A/N: Time for a lemon!
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The sex that night did not go the way that Kanda was expecting it to. Allen was the one to instigate the sex, so Kanda had been fully prepared to let him take the lead from start to finish, including letting him be the dominant one during the actual act. It was only fair that they took turns being the one on top. Kanda had been completely willing to let the Moyashi take him, yet, from the moment they reached their bed, it was clear that Allen fully expected to be the one on the bottom.
Kanda certainly had no problem with taking the lead and dominating his Moyashi's body - he hadn't actually wanted to be on the bottom - but it worried him that Allen was being so submissive during sex. Especially now that his feelings towards their relationship had truly changed for the better.
Allen was a fighter and he didn't take any crap from anyone, especially when it came from Kanda. That same thing should have applied to sex. The Moyashi should have been putting up a fight every time they slept together and trying to take control. Kanda could sort of understand why Allen had defaulted to being the submissive partner back when they were just starting to figure out how to be in a sexual relationship, but that was something that he had fully expected to go away once Allen's feelings changed. It was worrisome that it didn't.
Yes, Allen had figured out rather quickly that being the submissive didn't mean lying there like a log and simply letting his body be used, but playing with Kanda's hair and grinding their hips together were a far cry from fighting for dominance; the brat wouldn't even initiate a kiss. Kanda could only conclude that Allen was still too scared of him to try, but that made about as much sense as the fact that he was being so submissive did.
Even tonight, now that he had said, "I love you," out loud - even if he hadn't truly meant it - Allen was still defaulting to being submissive. He may have dragged Kanda to the bed, but once they got there, all he did was drop their hands and stare expectantly up at the samurai.
Even though Allen's behavior confused him, Kanda was quick to capture his lips and push him down against the mattress. It may have been weird that the Moyashi was being submissive, but this was still the first time that the brat had suggested sex, and Kanda wasn't going to let that go to waste. There was something arousing about having Allen actually ask for sex instead of just going along with Kanda's whims.
Once he had Allen properly pinned to the bed, Kanda began ravaging his Moyashi's mouth, tasting everything that the boy had to offer and taking great pleasure in the fact that kissing was all it took to make the normally innocent Moyashi moan like a filthy whore.
When kissing was no longer enough to satisfy the growing heat inside him, Kanda moved on to the boy's neck and throat. He refreshed the fading hickeys from their last encounter and added some new ones, taking great pride in the fact that Allen's fair, porcelain skin was marked as his and had been that way ever since they started sleeping together. And while he wished that the marks could be seen by everyone, so that they would all know that the Moyashi belonged to him, Kanda understood why Allen insisted that the marks be in places that could be easily covered by his clothes, and it was enough for now that he knew that they were there; admiring his handiwork in public could wait until Allen was ready for everyone to know about his pregnancy.
Finished with the latest hickey, and being driven mad by the way Allen was playing with his hair, Kanda turned his focus on getting the Moyashi's clothes the rest of the way off. The brat's new maternity clothes were more difficult to remove than his usual attire, but Kanda knew better than to give into his impatience and rip the garments off. Once the Moyashi was fully naked, Kanda tossed his own shirt aside and turned his attentions on the boy's bare chest. Allen's nipples grew more sensitive with every day that passed - it had something to do with his pregnancy, but that's all Allen would tell him - and Kanda loved the screeching noises the Moyashi made when they were teased. He looked forward to the day when he was going to be able to make the brat reach orgasm just from teasing his nipples. Though when Allen suddenly spasmed and released his load, screaming out Kanda's first name as he came, it became pretty clear that that someday was actually today.
Kanda wanted to play with his Moyashi's naked body some more, but after hearing Allen scream like that, it was time to focus on getting his own release. After leaving a few tender kisses on the Moyashi's slightly swollen belly, Kanda shifted his focus lower, barely managing to remember to grab the lube before he set about stretching the Moyashi's hole.
Allen returned to his senses just in time to have Kanda shove his dick roughly into his hole and ram his prostate dead on. It was an unexpected pain that was immediately drowned out by pleasure as he came yet again.
The Moyashi's second orgasm caught Kanda by surprise, but he managed to hold his own against the boy's spasming passage and not release before he was ready. It took longer than he liked for Allen to return to his senses again, but Kanda wanted to wait until the boy was coherent before proceeding with the main event. In the meantime, he got to savor the sight of a Moyashi that was lost in pleasure, with his head thrown back against the pillows and his messy white hair splayed around him. The flush on his face and the way his skin glistened with sweat made him gorgeous, but the best part was the way his mouth hung open and his expressive silver eyes had all but rolled back into his head. Kanda found that Allen was at his most beautiful during sex, and the view was definitely worth the monumental effort it took to hold himself back.
Once the Moyashi was aware of his surroundings again, Kanda began pounding mercilessly into the boy. He loved the way Allen attempted to beg for more yet failed miserably because he couldn't manage to string two words together. This time when Allen came, Kanda allowed himself to follow, releasing his load as he buried his shaft deep inside the boy.
Coming down from his high, Kanda's first coherent thought was that if he had known that sex with the obnoxious Moyashi was going to be that good, he'd have set aside his pride and done it years before the incident that had landed them in their current situation. But the samurai was not the type to dwell on what-ifs, so he pushed the thought aside and focused on more practical things, like moving off of Allen so that his weight was no longer on the boy's pregnant belly. The movement made Allen stir, and the content smile that graced his face was gorgeous. Seeing that the Moyashi was ready to let himself pass out, Kanda acted quickly, pulling him into a seated position and then off the bed.
Allen may have whined about wanting to sleep as he allowed himself to be led to the bathroom, but this was one of those times where he was grateful for the samurai's growing overprotective side. When they were done with sex, Kanda always made sure that he cleaned himself up, used the toilet, and brushed his teeth before letting him go to bed, and even if he would rather just pass out after sex, Allen appreciated that his husband was looking out for his health.
Once they were done cleaning up, Kanda guided the half-asleep Moyashi back to the bed, where he immediately broached the subject that had been bothering him all night. "You know, if you ever want to be on top, all you have to do is say so."
The subject was unexpected after what they had just done. Allen had been expecting it to come up eventually, but not so soon and not instigated by Kanda. He had thought that it would take weeks of Lavi pestering them about who was on top before they had this conversation. Not only that, but it was just too weird that it was the samurai himself who was suggesting that they swap positions in bed. Allen wasn't prepared to be talking about this right now, so he tried to turn it around on Kanda. "Why would it matter if I want to be on top or not? It's not like you're actually going to give up dominance and let me fuck you. The whole thing is moot."
The explanation would have made perfect sense, if it weren't painfully obvious that the brat was being glib in order to avoid responding to the suggestion. And it irritated Kanda that the Moyashi still didn't trust him enough to be honest with his feelings. "I'm being serious, Allen. If it's what you want to do, I'm more than willing to let you top me. You don't have to be submissive all the time."
The sincerity of the words made Allen feel a little guilty about the assumptions he'd made about his husband; his inability to read Kanda had only gotten worse since their marriage. After everything that had happened in the last few months, Allen should have been able to tell by now when Kanda was lying and when he was telling the truth. And it was that guilt that caused the embarrassing truth to slip out. "I genuinely have no interest in topping. I enjoy being on the bottom. It may be considered the submissive position, but I like it. I like being able to watch your face while you make love to me. It's so much more expressive during sex than it usually is."
Kanda almost laughed at the irony of that. The reason that the Moyashi had just given for liking being on the bottom was one of the things Kanda liked best about being on top; watching Allen's face as he lost himself in pleasure was completely intoxicating. Kanda briefly debated pointing that out to the Moyashi, but the way the boy was staring at him, clearly expecting an argument, put an end to that idea. A fight was the last thing he wanted right now. And while Kanda didn't believe Allen's claim that he was being submissive because he liked it, the brat wasn't exhibiting any of his usual tells, which in theory meant that he wasn't lying. So rather than prolong the conversation and risk upsetting the Moyashi, Kanda chose to let the subject drop. "If you ever change your mind, just say so."
"I won't. But if I do, you'll be the first to know. Thank you." Allen let out a contented sigh and snuggled closer, using the samurai's shoulder as a pillow. "And thank you again for making me keep the baby."
Kanda frowned in embarrassment, but he still wrapped his arms around Allen's softer body; the way the boy was laying on him meant that his baby bump was wedged between them in such a way that Kanda couldn't reach it, so cuddling would have to do. "Whatever you say, Moyashi."
The evasive response made Allen smile. Kanda had become much more open with his feelings since their marriage, and it was amusing to try to figure out which things he'd talk about and which things his pride made him hide. "You know, I'm surprised you wanted a kid that badly. You and babies don't really seem to go together. It's always been weird to me that you want this baby so much that you were actually going to make me carry it. And even now that I've ... calmed down, it's still strange that you want the baby. I mean, I know you refused to let me have an abortion because you were looking out for me, but even then, you still had to have factored in your own feelings, because no matter how much you were trying to protect me, you wouldn't have made me keep a child that you didn't want."
Kanda frowned at the Moyashi's babbling. Now that he was certain that Allen truly wanted their unborn child, it was time to be completely honest with him, but that didn't make what he had to say any easier to say. "Actually, I didn't want the baby. Not technically anyway. Back then, my feelings towards your pregnancy were exactly what you thought they were: a sense of duty and responsibility. I had gotten you pregnant and that meant that I was going to have a baby. As far as the abortion goes..."
Kanda sighed heavily as he searched for the right words, mildly surprised that Allen hadn't tried to interrupt him yet. The earnest look in the Moyashi's silver eyes bordered on loving, and it was both touching and disturbing that the brat was so calm after being told that he had been made to keep a baby that neither of them had wanted. It was best to continue quickly before he lost himself in those eyes. "Not letting you have an abortion had nothing to do with me wanting the baby. I had no clue if I actually wanted to be a father or have a child, but I did know that aborting the baby was something that I was going to regret. The end of this war is in sight, and if we actually manage to survive it, I was going to look back on that moment and wonder why on earth I let you kill our child. I had to make sure that you kept it, for both of our sakes."
Allen's eyes had clouded over, but he had also broken the stare, burying his face in Kanda's shoulder before Kanda could get a read on his feelings, and that worried him. There was no telling how the Moyashi was going to react to what he'd just been told, but he most likely wasn't going to take it well. When Allen finally spoke, the words were quiet and he was clearly on the verge of tears. "...But you want it now, right?"
Kanda chuckled in relief as he kissed the top of the Moyashi's head; Allen truly had gotten his priorities straight if that was his biggest concern with all this. "I do. And not because I had to want it if I wanted to be with you. I warmed up to the baby before that first mission was over, and if you hadn't been so emotionally vulnerable at the time, I assure you that you would have witnessed a much more violent reaction to the discovery that our child is Innocence compatible. I'm scared, and there's a whole lot about pregnancy and babies that I just don't understand, but I love our child."
The answer was exactly what Allen had hoped to hear. The belief that Kanda wanted the baby had been one of the few things keeping him sane through his unwanted pregnancy, and even now that his own feelings had changed, he still desperately needed his husband to want their baby. However, something Kanda had just said was quite confusing. "What do you mean, 'you don't understand'? It's pregnancy, not rocket science. Doesn't everyone know all about that stuff?"
The comment earned him a flicked ear. "Not everyone was raised by General Cross, you know. Some of us grew up in laboratories where no one cared if we learned how the real world worked. I-"
Kanda's tone may have been flippant, but Allen could tell that the conversation was veering into things that made him uncomfortable, so he interrupted before the samurai could get himself worked up. "Right. Sorry. I forgot that your childhood was even less normal than mine was. But wouldn't General Teidoll have taught you- ... never mind. Even if he'd tried to teach you those things, you wouldn't have listened."
"Probably not."
Allen chuckled briefly at the way Kanda grumbled out his response. "Well, you've got the opportunity to experience it all firsthand now. Rather than just learning about it, you're actually going to get to watch your child grow inside me, and that's probably the better way to go about it. We've also got all those pregnancy books Lenalee brought over the other day. I know you don't care for reading educational stuff like that, but it's got to be easier on your pride than actually talking about it would be, right?"
Kanda blinked at the sincerity sparkling in Allen's silver eyes. The Moyashi's suggestion was genuine, meant to ease his embarrassment rather than tease him over his pride, and that was unexpected. But then again, this was also about their baby and their upcoming parenthood, so maybe it made perfect sense that the Moyashi wasn't going to tease him about something so serious. Not knowing what to say in response, Kanda rolled his eyes and acted annoyed. "Just go to sleep, Moyashi, or I'm going to have to fuck you again."