Elain

He wants to kiss you the shadows whispered to her, pulling a gasp from deep in her throat. Elain didn't know that the shadows could speak to anyone but him, and by the way that Azriel's eyes darted to the shadow hovering at her ear, she figured maybe they didn't.

He wants to kiss me. He wants me to kiss him. Elain had felt it, had known it, but to hear it said to her so plainly, from the shadows that danced around him and lived within him.

Elain slipped her hands from his cheeks and saw his smile falter slightly as his hands dropped beside him. He wanted to kiss her and had just told her she made him feel alive. She could barely keep the smile off her face as she grabbed his hands and pulled them towards her. Elain brushed one of his scarred hands on her heated cheek and rested the other on her erratic heart. He made her heart sing and her mind race and she was going to kiss him.

Do it they whispered, sending a slight chill down her spine as the shadows grazed her sensitive fae ears.

It was all the encouragement Elain needed before she pulled her hand away from Azriel's and grasped the back of his neck. His body loosened at her touch, allowing her to pull him down towards her. Elain met him halfway, balancing on her toes as their lips connected. It was fire and ice and every single feeling wrapped into one. Elain had never felt anything like this before. She had shared a chaste kiss or two with Greyson but nothing like this. Azriel deepened the kiss as a small moan escaped Elain's throat.

She had moaned, from just a kiss, and her cheeks and neck flared a bright red. She made to pull away from him in embarrassment but Azriel had used the slight opening of her lips to slip his tongue against hers. It was electricity and euphoria and Elain swore she could take flight in that moment.

Azriel's wings shook out and wrapped around her, pulling her in tight as her arms constricted against his neck. She was gasping for air, not wanting to break away from him long enough to gulp in a breath. Azriel pulled away and peppered kisses along her jaw, nuzzling into her neck and breathing in her scent. Elain's hands fisted through his silky hair, trying to find enough purchase to pull their bodies even closer together.

To her dismay they broke apart, still only inches from each other's faces. A small laugh escaped Elain's lips, brushing her own hot breath against Azriel's neck as his fanned against her cheek. She pulled back and stared into his eyes, they were deep pools of hazel that flared with warmth and desire.

"Azriel." Elain gasped, still feeling breathless as she drank him in. "Do it again."

A wide smile tugged on his lips and Elain felt even more breathless than she thought possible. He was stunning, absolutely beautiful. A ray of sunshine in her dark world, a patch of cool shade on a blistering day. And in that moment, Elain knew, he was everything.

He pulled her in for another kiss, the claws at the top of his wings pushing into her back lightly as she melted into him once again. This was the world, her life, all experiences both good and bad wrapped into one. Her heart tugged in his direction and she felt connected to him like she never thought possible. Azriel was her world, he was the center of it. He was the sun, the earth and she was a moon, orbiting around him with nothing to hold her to this world except him.

"Elain," Azriel groaned, resting his forehead against hers. He was breathing heavily and his eyes fluttered shut as he repeated her name Elain.

She hummed in response, adoring the way her name sounded coming out of his mouth, echoing through her in his deep rumbling voice.

"Tell me this is real, Elain. Tell me I'm not imagining this."

The disbelief in his voice made her stomach tighten up and her throat constrict. This was everything she wanted, every wish she ever had come true. Could it be the same for him? Had he been thinking about this, wanting this just as much as she did?

"This is real. I'm me and you're you and we're here together and it's perfect." Elain whispered, pressing a light kiss to his nose, his closed eyes, his cheeks. "This feels so right, Azriel."

Elain stepped out of his embrace, her heart pounding and her head feeling light. She looked up at him and couldn't keep the smile off her face. He was radiant and he didn't even know it, couldn't see himself the way she saw him. His smile mirrored hers as his eyes stayed wide in wonder. Elain's hands reached up and touched his face, cupping his cheeks lightly. She couldn't stop it, would never get enough of him, could never get used to the fact that she could do this. He was here, and he wanted this as much as she did.

"I want to fly, Azriel."

"What?"

"Let's go somewhere. I want to fly with you, Azriel." She beamed, hope filling her chest. "Right now."

He looked taken aback but nodded quickly. He grasped at her hand and tugged her onto the balcony that led out of her room. The feeling of his hand in hers took her breath away. Just earlier that night she had been stealing small grasps of his hands at any chance but now she could do this always, could hold his hand while walking around Velaris, could reach out for him under the table at family dinners. She wanted this, wanted him, and she hoped he wanted her, to be with her. They had kissed but did it mean anything to him? Elain couldn't imagine that Azriel would just kiss her with no regard to what it meant to her. But she had been the one to kiss him.

His arms wrapped around her, pulling her into his embrace as he shot off the balcony and into the skies. His wings beat loudly behind them, booming in time with her heart. The night air was chilly but his body was radiating a deep warmth. Elain threw her head back, marveling at the bright stars that glittered above her.

She would never get used to how brilliant the night skies were here. It had taken months for her to realize that nights in this court were more breathtaking than she ever would have imagined. It's the night court, Elain. Nesta had chided her, rolling her eyes like she always did. But Elain still didn't appreciate it as much as she should have, she loved her early mornings too much. She had made a habit of going to bed early to be able to watch the sunrise, so it was rare that she basked in the shining stars. She needed to see this more often, needed to bask in the twinkling lights that shone a thousand times brighter than anything she saw back home in her youth.

Elain turned her focus to Azriel's face and found him staring at her, his eyes bore into her soul and made her heartbeat quicken. A small smile lifted up a corner of his mouth and Elain knew he heard the change of rhythm. She was glad, was glad for his Illyrian instincts. He deserved it, he deserved to know what he did to her, what he made her feel.

"You take my breath away." Azriel said, leaning in close to her so she could hear him. His words tickled at her ear and made her cheeks bloom a bright red. Elain nuzzled into his neck, pressing a kiss to the rounded top swirl of his tattoo.

The words fought to get out of her, and she wanted to say it. She wanted to offer herself to him, to be his and for him to be hers. She didn't know how he would respond, what he would want but she couldn't wait any longer to find out. They had kissed and it had been perfect. She had taken a risk and she knew, she just knew, that she had to take a few more tonight to keep him by her side. Elain needed to know this was real, needed to know they wouldn't go on tomorrow as if nothing had happened.

"I want to be with you, Azriel. In whatever way you'll let me, for however long." She replied, hoping he heard her over the beating of his wings.

"Elain," He whined, a shudder passed through his body as he pulled her even closer to him. "Do you mean it?"

Elain nodded, not knowing how to really express how much she meant it. "With everything I am, Azriel. I am yours."

His breath caught and his wings stilled for a second, sending them plummeting through the air before his wings snapped back out and buoyed them. She should have been scared but she wasn't, she felt safe in his arms, protected. A small giggle bubbled from her lips and she pulled back to stare at him. "Do you believe me?"

Azriel nodded quickly, his eyes staying locked on the horizon. She wanted him to look at her, to lock eyes with her and get lost in them. But Elain knew he wouldn't do that, she could see the tension that had built in his shoulders the second he had lost focus and lost height. He wouldn't be distracted again until they had settled back onto her balcony.

"Let's go home." Elain suggested,"I want to kiss you more."

Azriel huffed a laugh and let his eyes flick over to meet hers before focusing back on the sky. He tilted his wings to the side and sent them looping back around towards the manor. His wings beat even louder and they seemed to dart through the air quicker than she ever had before. A smile bloomed over her features at his urgency and she didn't stifle the giggle that burst forward through her lips.

She wouldn't hold back, not with him, not now. She would wear her heart on her sleeve and let her emotions flow freely. He was perfect and made her giddy and she wanted him to know how happy she was around him and how comfortable she felt in his arms and under his gaze.

Azriel's wings snapped in tight and he landed loudly on her balcony as a little yelp escaped her lips. He held her close, not putting her down right away as she stared up at his face.

"Hello."

"Hello, Elain."

A yawn escaped her mouth and she cursed herself, she didn't want this day to end. It had been perfect, more amazing than she ever could have expected when she woke up. A day in the garden had turned into a whirlwind romantic night and she didn't want to say goodbye. Would she wake up tomorrow and have it all be a dream?

Azriel caught her sleepy exhale and pulled out of her grip. "I should go."

"I'm not tired." Elain whined, pushing her lower lip out in a pout.

Azriel chuckled quietly and grasped her hands in his, pressing a light kiss to her knuckles. "I'll see you tomorrow, Elain."

"Stay with me tonight." Elain whispered, reaching a hand out to graze his as he pulled away. "Please we can- we can just sleep."

It wasn't proper, no, not at all. But Elain wasn't that girl anymore. She had left that life long ago and no longer wanted to be back in it. She wanted this, to be here with him at this moment. To say farewell to all the rules and boundaries that had swarmed around her and choked her. Elain could be something, something great because she was here with him.

"Are you sure, Elain?" Azriel asked, an apprehensive look on his face.

She smiled at that. Azriel, her Azriel. A zing of pleasure shot through her body at the thought. He was hers, for as long as he wanted to be. And she was his, for as long as he would allow her to be. She had never felt anything like this, this want and need for him to be close by.

"Stay."

Her hands were still clasped around his and she could see the hesitancy in his eyes as he searched her gaze for any doubt.

"Please."

Elain watched Azriel's throat bob as he swallowed and nodded at her, their eyes locked together. She let a smile overtake her face before she pulled away and padded over towards her dresser to get some nightclothes.

When she emerged from her bathing room, Azriel was still standing in the same spot, shifting awkwardly from foot to foot.

Elain slowly approached him, grabbing his arm and tugging him towards the bed. His cheeks were flushed in red and he looked down at his flying leathers and back at her.

Azriel unclasped the hooks on his thick armored jacket and pushed down his dark pants to reveal some thin long Johns and a short sleeve black shirt. Elain gasped slightly at his uncovered arms and she realized she had never seen him in anything but a long sleeve shirt. In all her imagination she always thought that his burns were localized to his hands, but now looking at him she saw that they swirled and snaked up closer to his elbows.

Azriel winced under her critical gaze and she forced her eyes to soften with warmth. He was beautiful and perfect and she had stupidly let her anger show through her eyes.

Elain's heart lurched as she realized he might mistake her fury with fear. She reached out and grasped his hands in hers, sliding them slowly up his scars to cradle his elbows.

"You are perfect." She hummed, pulling lightly on his forearms so his thighs rested between her legs as she sat on the bed, looking up at him. "I see strength and anger and hurt and it does not scare me. It is beautiful."

Elain pulled her legs up and pushed into the bed, scooting to the side to make enough room for his large form. She looked up at the ceiling and counted the seconds, hoping he would join her but still unsure if he would want to.

Azriel slid into the bed beside her, his warmth enveloping her. Elain turned onto her side to be face to face with him, she wanted to fall asleep looking at him. She wanted to dream about him. The moonlight that flowed through the window cast a sliver of light across his face. He was here with her and they had kissed.

"You're beautiful" Elain breathed, barely able to keep the words inside of her for more than a second. "More than beautiful. I can't find the words- You're so much more."

Red splotched his cheeks and the tips of his rounded ears and a sigh escaped Azriel's mouth as Elain captured his lips in hers. She couldn't get enough, wanting to feel him, to taste him.

"Elain" he breathed, nuzzling his face into the crook of her neck. It felt so right, it all felt so right and easy and they fit together like puzzle pieces.

"Elain, I get nightmares." He whispered into her skin, hiding his face from her view. He sounded ashamed and regretful and Elain knew this was the reason behind his hesitation tonight, why he was so insistent that he not stay here.

"Azriel," She whispered, cupping his face in her hands and maneuvering them so she could look into his eyes. "Oh, Azriel."

Azriel's eyes were downcast and it made her heart ache with guilt. He looked at her and it was like a knife cleaved into her heart. His emotions had always shown through his expressions but this was a new kind of vulnerability for him to show her. She had never seem him look like this, like he was bracing himself for her rejection.

"It's okay," Elain whispered, tracing a finger across his forehead and down the side of his face to stroke his cheek. "I get nightmares too."

Azriel closed his eyes and hummed lightly as he snuggled in closer to her and settled down to sleep in her arms.