Thanks so much to my only reviewer Desires of Autumn Leaves. To answer your question zzdoricorezz was (just in my opinion) an awesome writer who had (as you can read from the story's) a different view on Boirs and Kai's relationship and was able to write it out so well that it made me think.
This is the link to her page, sadly nothing is on it anymore, it's been wiped clean. I wish I could still read all the other story's she wrote, if my memory serves me right she had around 15 I think. Miss her so much.
/u/1939925/zzdoricorezz - just fill in the gap and replace the dot with a . You know the drill.
TishaLiz
Disclaimer: I do not own Beyblade or any of the characters, just the events in this story.
========================= No Yoai, No Rape, No Sexual abuse. =========================
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Just before death (Re-write)
by zzdoricorezz
Chapter 5
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Kai wakes up before sunrise in the same position he had the day before, staring at the ceiling. This time Kai doesn't wonder how he got there as he's now got it into his head that he's in Boris' house.
Shifting slightly Kai notices there's some weight on top of him and looking down onto his chest he finds the clothes Boris had dropped on his bed yesterday with the shoes on top. Kai isn't surprised that Boris would have placed it on top of him. He was told yesterday that he'd better have changed outfits by the next time Boris saw him, But he didn't feel like changing.
He went to sleep in the same clothes but this time removing his jacket and shoes himself. Yesterday after recovering from the shock Boris caused him he realised his shoes was not on his feet. He won't let Boris remove them a third time.
Moving the clothes off of him and pushing himself up, Kai notices a small piece of paper falling from the pile. Picking it up the words 'clean up' is written on it in what Kai recognises to be Boris' hand writing. Kai can't even recall the last time he saw Boris' hand writing but he knows it belongs to him.
Sitting up Kai wonders if Boris has gone out otherwise he would've told him to clean up himself. Boris wouldn't have passed an opportunity to try and upset Kai but then again this is Boris. Maybe Boris left him a note on purpose to only make him think that Boris had left the house. That sounds just like Boris to play at such games.
On the other hand, Kai likes the thought of taking a shower and putting on his new clothes. One he would feel better and two it wouldn't give Boris something to terrorise him about anymore.
Moving his feet over the edge of the bed Kai finds a cup sitting next to him that looks like coffee. It's no longer steaming hot, so Kai reaches out to feel how warm it still is. Finding it luke warm means that Boris had placed it there quite some time ago. Although it's not as hot as coffee should be, it's not too cold to drink either. Kai can't deny that he's in desperate need of caffeine and sugar. Another two things he haven't had in a very long time.
Picking up the new clothes and shoes, Kai makes his way to the open door and takes a look out into the hall. All the lights are still off and listening carefully Kai can't say that Boris is in the house. Relaxing at the thought that he doesn't have to watch his back for a few minutes Kai leaves the bedroom and enters the bathroom almost across from his room.
As the sun has nearly started to rise it is still mostly dark, Kai switches on the bathroom light and closes the door. Kai doesn't know how long ago Boris left or how long he'll be gone so he doesn't waste anytime. Opening the showers glass door, Kai opens the taps for the water to start heating up.
Taking off his socks and straightening, Kai notices that he's standing next to the bathroom mirror. Turning to look at himself Kai recognises a clearly shocked expression on his own face. Kai hasn't seen himself in a mirror a part from his reflection in shop windows in months. Seeing himself in such a state, Kai starts wondering if Boris isn't feeling pity and that why he's helping him. An angered expression crosses Kai's face, he doesn't want anyone's pity, it's his own fault that he's in this condition right now.
The steam caused by the hot water running, fogs up most of the mirror and it makes Kai feel less exposed. Slowly lifting his shirt and pulling it over his head, Kai closes his eyes. He knows that he has lost a lot of weight and he can feel his own ribs. Aside from the scars he got from his stay at the abbey, Kai has acquired some new unwanted marks and scars from the streets. He's not sure if he wants to see just how bad he really looks.
Drying himself off after taking a shower, Kai puts on his new clothes and feels somewhat like the victim of a stalker as the clothes and shoes fits him perfectly. Turning back to the mirror Kai doesn't only feel like a new person but also looks like a new person, except for the cursed blue tattoos on his face. That's the only thing ruining him from feeling better, he must rid himself of it somehow.
Folding his old clothes neatly, Kai plans on keeping them. He can't just throw them away. These thin and worn out clothes are the only things that had kept him alive and were the most valuable things he owned in the past few months, although they helped little for the cold. Folding his jacket, Kai finds the money note that had given him the excuse to come back to this house.
Leaving the bathroom Kai first checks to see if the coast is clear. After that stunt Boris pulled yesterday Kai isn't so sure that Boris is in his right mind. Kai will not give Boris the satisfaction of jumping every time he appears out of nowhere. Recalling that feeling he felt and that look on Boris' face Kai feels the familiar urge for revenge.
Placing the neatly folded clothes and money note on the small desk in the corner of the room then collects the coffee cup he'd emptied and leaves the room. So far Kai is sure that Boris hasn't returned yet, that's if he even left. Entering the kitchen Kai walks over to the kitchen sink and cleans his cup. After drying it Kai turns around and looks around at all the cupboards with closed doors. Kai doesn't know where the cup goes. Boris said to keep out of his closets and drawers, he didn't say anything about cupboards. And besides Boris will probably tell him where it goes anyway, why wait.
Starting on the left side of the cupboard where the plates and bowls are, Kai checks the rest of the cupboards. Finding the glasses in the next cupboard Kai can tell he's getting close. Just as Kai's closing the cupboard with the glasses he hears the front door closing meaning Boris has returned.
Not bothering himself with Boris, Kai moves along to the next door which he thinks has the cups. Opening the cupboard Kai is proved correct as he finds the cups packed in two rows. Predicting that Boris would by now be passing the kitchen Kai is sure Boris is standing in the doorway.
"Yes, I am looting your kitchen." Without looking to see if Boris is standing there Kai gives a sarcastic remark about why he is looking around the kitchen cupboards.
"Not like you'll find anything." Boris sighs to himself, realising it's too late and that Kai was already in the kitchen to be able to sneak up on him.
Boris walks over to the table in the middle of the kitchen and places a bag on top that seems to be full of food. Taking out a carton of milk, Boris walks over to the fridge.
"You're look better." Boris comments in a tone that is devoid of any taunt or sarcasm but with a hint of, dare Kai say it, care.
Kai stays silent as he responds to himself that he looks like crap. He definitely doesn't look like someone who battled in the previous beyblading championship. Suddenly thinking about beyblading and his old team a very familiar feeling of anger rises in Kai's chest. Why did he even think about them?
"What's wrong?" Boris asks as Kai's gaze has dropped to the floor and a hurt angry expression finds it way across his face. It's not a usual angry Kai expression as there's the hurt that's caused that anger is present. Kai has always had the technique mastered of showing only the anger and to hide the pain that been caused but Kai seems to have lost control over his emotions or maybe just his mask.
Realising that his inner feelings are showing Kai swiftly turns around to hide his face. He wanted to say 'nothing' but the way he is feeling now he's not going to allow his voice a chance to betray him also. It's this same feeling that landed Kai on the streets of Russia. This feeling of being abandoned by the people that said they cared, by his team, by everyone. It's that feeling that caused him to wall people out and wall himself in, that feeling that forced him into the embrace of solitude and loneliness.
Kai is pulled out of his mind and tenses as Boris places his hands on Kai's shoulders. Although Boris can't see Kai's face, he knows Kai is hurting. He knows no words would make Kai feel better or maybe his actions are just to remind Kai about emotions. Boris has spent most of his life teaching kids not to have emotions.
Wondering if Boris is trying to scare him or trying to console him, Kai can't deny that he feels a little comforted. This is the most anyone has ever try to comfort him. Not like Kai would let anyone touch him to offer comfort, then why is Kai feeling comfort instead of fear or maybe anger at Boris touching him?
Noticing that he's frozen on the spot as Kai can't seem to gather the courage or strength to shrug Boris' hands off and walk away, Kai is now starting to feel panicked. Whenever Boris laid a hand on any trainee it was to harm.
As if Boris can read Kai's mind that he's started to feel uncomfortable or maybe that Kai is just that bad at hiding his feelings, Boris removes his hands from Kai's shoulders and steps back to the table. Gathering up some more groceries Boris moves on to put them away in the pantry and cupboards.
Turning towards the door, Kai calmly leaves the kitchen avoiding all eye contact. Kai isn't sure what to make of Boris' actions, was it to try and comfort him or is he playing some new mind game? So far for today Boris hasn't said anything to try and provoke him, Boris can only be up to something.
Stepping into his room Kai walks over to the window to look outside, the snow is falling with a few cars passing by every now and then. Feeling very glad that he's not outside at the moment. Thinking back to Japan, instead of blistering snow it would be warmer and sunnier weather. On the streets of Japan life was easy but here in Russia it's almost always cold and snowing. But Kai would rather be here in the warm house, Boris' house, being terrorised, interrogated and maybe intimidated rather than to be out on the streets. Kai would take Boris making his life difficult over starving in the freezing snow.
"Here." Boris enters the room carrying a tray with another bowl of soup and a small plate with two slices of buttered toast. Kai slightly turns to see Boris placing the tray on the bed side table. Boris knew if he stood there waiting for Kai to take it from him, he would've been waiting forever. Boris was first considering to call Kai from the kitchen but knew that Kai wouldn't of touched the food if he was there watching him.
Boris is out the door when Kai turns from the window. Sitting down on the bed Kai can smell the soup. Soup again, simple food for a week and simple stomach, but Kai doesn't have a problem, it's better than sitting somewhere in the snow dreaming about it. After every bite and sip, Kai turns to look at the door to make sure he doesn't have an audience. People watching him does not infuriate him as much as it creeps him out. Why Kai would be bothered he doesn't know, the tattoos on his face do attract some strange glares.
Finishing what's left of the meal Kai doesn't feel like going back into the kitchen but then again he doesn't feel like having Boris on his case either. Taking the tray and leaving the room, Kai sees Boris as he passes the living room doors busy with some papers. For someone who has lost everything, he sure is busy. Kai is sure these past few days of seeing Boris being busy with papers is more than what he ever saw Boris do in the abbey for years.
Entering the kitchen Kai passes another empty bowl sitting on the table, which can only be Boris'. As Kai has the water running he wonders if he should wash Boris' bowl also. It would be no extra effort for Kai and it would hopefully make Boris wonder. But then again he will not encourage Boris to make him his slave.
"Don't wash it."
As Kai hears Boris from the living room he turns off the water. Kai may always do the opposite of what he is told but Boris is not going to catch him with this one. Drying off his dishes and putting them away Kai turns to leave the kitchen to go and spend the rest of the day in his room.
Kai now regrets thinking about what made him end up in the state he is now. Kai used to be the one everyone feared because he was stone cold. He lacked emotion, he was aggressive and vicious in his beybattles. He was raised as a heartless Hiwatari, he owned a street gang. He survived the abbey but just a few months on the Moscow's streets alone broke him.
Maybe it was everything in his entire life that he'd suppressed and after years of mounting up everything that it's just came crashing down at once. Kai knows that Boris knows that he's been broken, that his spirit is broken. And Boris is the last person he would've wanted to know that. But strangely enough Boris isn't responding like he would've if this was still back in the abbey's time. Thinking about it, Boris has changed over the years.
"Emotions are weak, young Kai." As Kai leaves the kitchen a chill runs down his spine, Boris' voice is cold and it's the same as it was in the abbey.
Kai reflects on what he was thinking a moment ago and muses, 'maybe he hasn't changed'. "I agree." Kai agrees in a calm tone without bothering to look into Boris' direction and continues on his way to his room. Kai knows that tone, Boris is now purposely trying to upset him. Kai knew the peace and quiet wouldn't last.
Stepping into his room, Kai walks over to the window and then turns around watching the open door expecting Boris to appear in it any second. Boris won't just let it go, he has to push until he breaks something. He was like that even with Voltaire, putting his life on the line just to see if he can upset the tyrant. Why, Kai honestly wouldn't know. Voltaire sponsored all of the money for the projects in the abbey and then Boris turns around and tries to upset him? Boris always had that back stabbing personality to him, that is why Kai never wondered too much why his grandfather is in jail for life and Boris was walking free a week after he was arrested. He probably pinned everything on Voltaire.
Staring at the open door with no result of Boris showing up, Kai gets impatient. He can't just walk away, now he's the one that has to pursue this fruitless endeavour of trying too see who's more upset when they're done. Leaving the room Kai heads down the hallway to the living room, not sure of what he's going to say to Boris. That's if he's going to say anything at all, but he just has to show Boris he's not going to back down that easily.
Finding Boris busy with sorting out papers on a desk in the midst of his filing cabinet field, Kai makes his way over. Stepping closer to the desk, Boris doesn't look up to even acknowledge Kai's presence but watches something intently on the desk.
Stopping in front of the desk, Kai notices an uneven ruler spinning on the desk.
"Truth or dare?" When the ruler stops spinning and points to Kai, Boris looks up and asks in a playful tone with an expression of interest.
Kai stares at the ruler and then moves his unimpressed glare to Boris. What is Boris doing? What, is he eighteen now? All that Kai knows about truth and dare is what he saw in the movies the bladebreakers watched from time to time and then Tyson trying to get him involved in a game.
"The other side is pointing at you." Kai informs Boris in an upset tone. Two minutes ago Boris was the aggressor and now he's playing games. Kai kind of feels like he played right into Boris hands. Boris knew that Kai wouldn't be able to walk away, Kai always have to have the last word.
"Alright then, truth." Boris acts like he realises is mistake but continues anyway.
Kai half way manages to mask his unbelief but Boris can see how much it's aggravating him. Wondering to himself if he should play along and encourage this sort of behaviour, Kai really can't think of anything he would like to know from Boris.
"You forfeit by way of hesitation, my turn, truth or dare?" Boris takes the opportunity of silence and repeats the question. A worried, confused frown finds it's way onto Kai's face. Maybe Boris has spent way too much time alone.
"You know Kai, that's the most emotion I've seen in you since that day I've met you for the first time." Boris keeps up his care free and playful tone, he's sure that will irritate Kai even more.
Without saying anything, Kai turns and walks away. He was not prepared for that by a long shot.
"Never enter a battle if you do not have a battle strategy, young Kai." Boris' tone starts out playful and then ends the sentence with a cold tone.
Returning to his room, Kai admits that Boris had him there. He didn't expect what Boris was going to do, he let Boris get to him although he knew that was Boris' plan and then he just had to walk away. Boris won, hands down.
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End of chapter 5
To be continued...
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