A/N: I do not own LOTR.
Thank you to all of you guys who favourited or followed the fic. You all are awesome!
Winniefawn: I hope that you love this chapter as much as you did the last one! ENJOY :)
La Femme Absurde: I'm glad that you're still sticking around. I hope you enjoy the chapter :)
Moonbeam178: Thank you so much! Hope you enjoy this chapter too :)
LightCDark: Karma biting back Brinielel sounds tempting... Thank you! I hope you enjoy this chapter too :)
Myharlequinromance321: It's always flattering to see new people enjoying the story. Thank you so much for the best wishes! Hope you enjoy the chapter and best wishes to you too :)
Katriella Rosewood: I want to write Eohere again too! So glad you liked the story. Hope you enjoy the chapter too :)
Timeline: A few important points:
Lotr doesn't exist in Lanette's world and even if you want it to exist then Lanette is ignorant to its presence (which is extremely surprising as Lanette is portrayed as an avid reader and the fact that she doesn't know about one of the most famous series as well... ) That is why I decided on the non-existence of the books as Lanette will not be a character with foreknowledge.
Lanette is a general surgeon, born and living in California, USA. Although she studied MBBS and specialisation in England. Therefore she is able to be a practising surgeon at the age of 27.
The timeline is roughly like this,
-She arrives in Middle-Earth at the end of October, 3016
-She stays in Bree for four months, (Nov, Dec, Jan, Feb and a bit of March)
-Meets Èohere a week into March, 3017
-Travels with him for almost 5 months, (March, April, May, June, July and a bit of August.)
-Stays in Rohan for 2 weeks until the end of August.
-Leaves for Gondor travels the whole Sept and reaches at the start of Oct.
-Meets Cathiel in November.
I hope it covers any questions you might have. If any confusions feel free to ask me. With that done,
Enjoy the chapter! RR.
Chapter#14: Lady Cathiel.
Sheets of rain poured down, sounding off of the hard marble of Minas Tirith. The howling winds cracked across the darkened night; the black riotous yet haunted. Trees whipped around furiously, their tops dancing to the howls. With every howl the windows rattled and doors smashed before they quietened to give a eerie gloom. The streets were empty, the few guards rushing into the shelter to protect themselves, although the soldiers still stood taught beyond the walls, facing the roaring winds of Pelennor with nothing but their steel wills.
The manors were quietened. Almost everyone had retired to their beds hours ago before this storm started deep into the night. The Lord Dervorin's manor, in particular, showed the few darkened balconies at the front. The lamps illuminating the entrance flickered and dimmed. The iron gate rattled against the chain, it's noise echoing across the quiet of the house. The swing whipped around, its branch creaking loudly.
The darkened path was interrupted, as above the kitchens, on the right corner, a small crown glass showed orange hue on the inside. Although it was dim enough to be neglected by any onlooker.
A gush of wind blew across the Pelennor and the window broke free of its bind. The wood creaked as it unbolted. A wave of cold wind entered the room and the candle sitting on the small wooden flickered and dimmed before blowing out and plunging the room into dark.
I sighed in annoyance. Getting up and shutting the small leather book with a snap, I picked up the candle stand. 'Just when I was about to know what he found in the cave!' I groaned. I padded my way across the new room, stumbling into the bedpost and then into the shelf. Navigating through my hands I pulled open the door stepping into the posh hallway. Lantern sticks lighted up the whole corridor. All the rooms were closed and locked as I was the only resident in this part of the manor. I took down a lantern and moved inside, not wanting to stay out here alone in the horrific weather. I stood for a moment at the entrance and took in my surroundings. It was more than twice the size of my previous room, which was no wonder as my previous room became too crowded if more than three people stood in it simultaneously. The bed was in the middle of the length, pressed to the side wall. Bed sheets were rich satin, the blue contrasting with the polished brown of the posts. It was a little bigger than single ones, maybe somewhere in between the medium range. A large wooden cabinet was placed across from it. The round coffee table was placed in front of the large window with two chairs surrounding it. What I really loved about this room was the fireplace (although I had no firewood yet to make any use of it) and the small plush carpet in front of it. A shelf occupied the right of the door but it was empty aside from a small candle stand. It was still a little ambiguous for me to be posted as a Lady companion of Lady Cathiel. Yesterday night was a flurry of activity and today I was transferred to this room. I had thought that I was chambermaid of the lady but Anaŕiel had been amused and explained to me that a lady companion accompanies her lady where ever and acts as an adviser, sometimes even a friend. By the time I transferred my little assortment of belongings and had gotten a round of these halls along with the outskirts of the Lady's quarters it had already been growing dark and dusty. Anaŕiel had assured me that I will get to meet Lady Cathiel tomorrow and had shooed me out of the kitchens and into my lonely room. Soon after sleep evaded me, the roaring weather making it impossible to be at rest. With nothing better to do, I had picked up the sole leather bounded novel placed on the lonely shelf. It didn't take me long to get engrossed in it, although due to the fact that I had not read for months it was a little difficult to make out the words.
I placed the lantern on the table and situated myself back on the seat. Looking out of the window my eyes met with nothing but dark. I tried to look around but gave up after a moment and returned to my book, not noticing as the hours flew by.
The morning dawned with a greyish hue, the clouds still surrounding the margin. I was woken two hours later by a maid knocking shyly on the door. I had gone to sleep a little before dawn and was not exactly in an optimum condition to meet the Lady and making an impression. After the fourth knock, I had dragged myself out of the bed. Rubbing the sleep out of my eyes I creaked open the door. I was greeted by the sight of a petite maid holding a steel bowl of warm water. A towel was draped on her right arm. She did a slight curtsy. "M'Lady, I have brought the water for you." Her voice was timid. I was already tired and after the events, I was not exactly trusting of anyone in this household aside from Anaŕiel and Brilon. Biting back a sarcastic remark I murmured incoherently in English and opened the door wider, plastering a small smile on my face. She shuffled into the room, her dark eyes curious at my language and her brown ponytail swaying behind her. I instructed her to place the bowl on the table. I washed my face and hands in the basin and then proceeded to brush my teeth with the paste that was so common in this city, all the while waiting for the maid to leave. She stood at the corner with her head bowed down. Her petite frame looked timid in this slouched position.
"You can leave if you have any more work to do." I offered lightly as I took the towel from her extended arms and dried my arms.
She looked up at me with wide eyes, "I am assigned to you, my lady."
My head snapped up from the towel and I stared at her incredulously. "Why would I have a maid?" I asked, my brow furrowing.
"You're the lady companion of Lady Cathiel." She paused for a moment, "It is the first time there has been a lady companion in our household in the past twenty years, M'lady."
"That is...different" I countered, not knowing what to comment at this piece of information. "but I still don't need someone working for me, I can do it on my own. I'm still a servant like you." I said in reassurance.
She stared at me with wide eyes, "No m'lady! A lady companion is not a servant. You're now a lady of a station in this house, just like Miss Terŕiela." It was now my turn to stare at her in disbelief. "Why didn't anyone inform me of this?" I complained about a groan. I turned around to take my dress out of the cupboard all the while trying to come up with some sort of game plan. Nothing came to mind at that instant. I chewed on my lip and cursed softly, Too much for keeping a low profile.
I munched on the piece of toast, my body slouched in annoyance. People flurried around me performing the many tasks. Aroma of roasted meat spread in the kitchen, the spices making my mouth water. Shaking away the trance I looked around in boredom. I had nagged at Anaŕiel for a whole of forty minutes for some sort of work. She had sighed and given me a light smirk before shooing me towards the counter to take my breakfast. I wasn't used to being this free for years now. Back home I had managed my apartment along with my job, making free time a luxury. Even here I've always had some sort of job or work. Other times I was busy travelling or studying. And now, since the morning, whenever I tried to do some even minute task myself the girl, Bnaŕia had looked mortified. A while ago I was folding some of my clothes when she had come into the room bearing firewood. One look at me and she had dropped the wood rushing forward to snatch away the laundry. She had given me a look and explained in a timid voice how things would be difficult for her if High Miss or God forbid Lady Brinielel saw me doing my work. At the mention of Lady I had tensed visibly and handed her the task without another word. Knowing what she did to Lord Rameron's wife I didn't want to take the chance. If I had thought yesterday that Lord Dervorin gave her some sort of punishment for her petty acts I couldn't have been more wrong. She was again up to flaunt around in the morning and even dining with the Lord who was engaged in polite conversation with his daughter. It made me realize how much she had everyone wrapped around her fingers. What she said was done and no matter how dangerous the results no one dared to speak up against her. I wondered again what had really happened to Lady Cathiel for her to live her life holed up without human interaction. Surely marriage wouldn't..couldn't have been the real factor.
I was startled out of my reverie by Bnaŕia as she came to stand beside me, her posture sloughing and submissive. I gave her a thoughtful look. There she was, yet another mystery I couldn't figure out. Why was she so timid? Surely this wasn't because it was thought pretty for women to quieten in submission these days. Or maybe because life wasn't that big of a success for a woman showing signs of intelligence and leadership. Or maybe I just wanted to hate such farcical ideas that seemed to be deeply rooted in the brains of the locality. My expression was cynical as I turned my head towards my cup. I drowned the tea in two large sips and pushed the stool inside the counter as I got up. My attention was focused upon Bnaŕia. She looked up from beneath her lashes "M'lady" she sounded, "Lady Cathiel has invited you to join her for the noon tea." As she finished her eyes strayed towards my empty cup. She furrowed her brow before looking at me apologetically, "I can tell Lady Cathiel that you've just had your tea-" I shrugged, stopping her successfully "No need, The Lady of the manor has invited me, it is extremely impolite to decline her, besides" I walked around the counter and looked back at her rushing figure, "tea is life." I didn't wait to see what her reaction would be, walking purposefully towards the impending meeting.
I knocked at the polished oak twice before the door was opened by a short plump woman. Her, surprisingly, corn hair were tied back loosely and her white skirt fell with light waves to the floor. A distrustful look flashed across her face before she opened the double doors wider to let me and an awed Bnaŕia in.
The inside of the room was wide, furnished in a similar fashion to that of Lady Brinielel although much bleak. A wide fireplace was crackling across the room and in front of it, a Lady was occupying one of the seats, a large number of refreshments and tea placed in front of her as she waited patiently while staring into the fire. The room was doused in an orange hue and the outside light was blocked with heavy velvet curtains. I moved towards the lady, straining my eyes to get a better look at her in the dimly lit room. The lady turned to face me the moment I stepped closer. Her violet gown swept around her feet and a fringe of her black hair escaped from the thin headpiece. Her hazel eyes met mine for a fleeting moment before she drew them away. When she got up her shoulders were bent humbly, not at all what I expected from a lady of her status.
I situated myself on the plush single sitter after a curtsy. The Lady herself became comfortable and nodded towards her maid. In a moment Bnaŕia was led to the adjoining room. I watched her being led away with discomfort. Why did she even bother? Not like there was something that Bnaŕia would be able to chatter away, she wasn't just suited for social gossiping.
"It makes me glad to make your acquaintance, Lady Lanette. I have heard a lot about you." My eyes snapped towards her face. I gave a smile dipping my head lightly.
"Not at all." A tense moment stretched on. My gaze swept once again across the room and then fell upon the masked expressions of the lady. "Although you're not at all like what I thought," I added instinctively. Which proved to be a mistake as the lady's maid, who chose that moment to step back into the room, snapped towards me. She was visibly angered.
"Why? Are you going to go and gossip with Lady Brinielel that her sister is not a threat to her in her holed up position!". My patience was thinning at this horrible atmosphere. I tilted my head and gave her a cold look.
"I never said that. If there is one thing I can assure you then it is that I won't be going around twittering about you," I scoffed, "especially not to Lady Brinielel." The maid looked like she wanted to say something again. Lady Cathiel looked up at the maid and she quietened, biting her lip and giving me a glare. I turned my attention back towards the lady, who was once again gazing at her folded hands on her lap.
"I know that you are not comfortable with me around and if you want then I'll come around the least I possibly can." I sighed softly, "I won't take it personally as I believe that you have the reason to doubt other's intentions."
The lady looked at my face to judge my expression. I made sure to keep as monotone as possible, after all, she was still the bloodline of Lady Brinielel. It was strange that I didn't even seem to get along with one of the two ladies of the household. Lady Cathiel nodded with slight hesitation.
"You can join me whenever you want Lady Lanette," her eyes snapped up to the maid as if asking for confirmation, "although you might find it a waste of time as there will not be anything to interest you here."
"I'll judge that for myself."
Another moment of silence. I gazed at the crackling fire. The hot red flames making different patterns. It was mesmerizing to gaze into a fire like that and to forget all about the present and wallow in the happenings of yesterday.
The maid came into my vision as she poured out two cups of tea. She put them on the china saucers and looked up at me,
"Would you like some sugar?"
"A cube, please." I accepted the cup with a murmured thanks. I drowned it as fast as possible without seeming rude. I couldn't think of anything to chat about and the lady didn't seem like she wanted to make the effort, staring into her tea as she sat. I placed the cup on the table and swept my eyes across the room. The lady was lost in her own world and the maid still staring holes into my skull. I took that as a cue to leave. I got up swiftly and bowed a curtsy,
"I shall be leaving now. My room's in the parallel hallway if you need my company." I added the last part lightly, hoping that she won't exactly want my company. The dull atmosphere had already caused my mood to go down the gutter.
"Ah! It was a pleasure, Lady Lanette." Lady Cathiel's voice was devoid of any pleasure she said that she had felt on my company.
"Of course not! The pleasure was all mine." I replied dully before moving swiftly away and out of the room. A distressed Bnaŕia scrambling after my quick stride.
Three days passed in a similar fashion. I got up and dressed every day, with no little help from Bnaŕia and went to sit with the lady for fifteen minutes. Even those minutes were spent sitting idly and sipping on some warm tea, the lady staring into the fire more and more frequently. The rest of my day was passed sitting bored in the kitchen during work hours and chatting with Anaŕiel and Brilon late into the night. I tried a few times to go out and walk a little but the continually decreasing temperature made it hard to be out and about wearing just a dress. If I thought about it, I could've just asked for some new clothes to be made but I was already getting paid for a job I wasn't properly doing so I just kept quiet and let the time flow.
I was putting on my shoes waiting for Bnaŕia to be done with her little chores. She always insisted on following me around and I obliged politely as I had no other company. Her timid self-made for a better company than the boredom I felt in Lady Cathiel's quarters. The most progress we had made until now was me asking whether she likes coffee or not, which she responded with a small quirk of her nose and a shake of her head. After that, I had just left her to her own devices. It was proving to be extremely useless whenever I tried to converse with her. So by the second day, I had stopped trying and now was waiting for her to initiate the talk. Maybe she'll get tired of my continuous company and open up a little. I wanted to get along with her. Not just cause it was my job but also because I did not have time to just go around living around comfortably. These days I was even tenser and I desperately wanted to do something to make Lady Cathiel realize that I wasn't here to be a hassle to her. I needed to befriend her as she was now my only hope for any answers. With so much free time on my hands, I had been reminiscent too much in the past. I realized yesterday that it was November already, a year had passed since I had stepped into this odd life. The fact had brought tears and I had spent the rest of the night crying softly into my pillow. Did one year mean that everyone back home already believes that I am dead? With every passing day, I felt the little spark of confidence fading. Every day the thoughts of being stuck in this world, so unlike my home, for eternity solidified. Every day I felt my mood growing worse. I was growing irate and snappish because of the bottled up anxiety. I had no one to share my fears, my concerns with. At least no one who knows where I really am from. Every day I thought about the far gone possibility of the road to Rohan. What if I had stuck with Èohere? At least I would've had someone to share my burdens with. I felt anguished, scared, disappointed and hurt. Maybe many other emotions too that I wasn't able to describe. But most importantly I felt alone. Alone in this constricting society and petty feuds. Alone in a country, I knew nothing about and among people I couldn't really be honest too. Alone in facing the problems that weren't related to me and trying desperately to solve someone else's complications when I can't even begin to think of my own ones. Just simply and complexlyalone.
In my dark and gloomy mood, I failed to notice the concerned glances of Bnaŕia or the troubled expressions of Anaŕiel or even the soft unusual concern of Brilon. Maybe I could've shared my burdens with them but I didn't. I did not want to go around telling something as far-fetched as my story. So I stayed quiet and spent my days wallowing in self-pity.
I got up and walked towards the door just as Bnaŕia came to stand beside me., done with her chores. The walk to the Lady's quarters was quiet. Bnaŕia being the quiet person she was rarely initiated conversation and I being too lost these days didn't try to bother. I stopped to compose myself outside the oak doors and exhaled a tired breath. I knocked twice before moving inside. The room was always like a painting drawn on a canvas. The only thing that was ever different was the lady's dress or hairstyle. The pose, the tea, the cakes, the roaring fireplace and the cynical expression of Naimĺa was exactly the same every day. The same old and boring routine.
I gave a curtsy to the lady and sat on my designated chair. Naimĺa served the tea as we exchanged a few pleasantries and then our voices faded into silence as we sipped on the tea, staring at the burning amber.
My gaze swept into the room after a while of stillness and fell upon the wall mirror on the side. I stared at my own reflection wondering how can I change so much in appearance than my previous self and yet remain exactly the same. My dark brown hair was tied in a ponytail, which now reached almost to my half back due to the courtesy of Bnaŕia. My almond brown orbs stared back at me tiredly, the bags under them becoming prominent due to the lack of proper sleep. The dark green colour of my dress contrasted with my skin, which previously being tanned for a few months due to the travels was now gradually turning pale, back to the original colour. My expression was one of distress and no matter how monotone I tried to appear it remained the same.
"Lady Lanette," I startled back to the present at the sudden sound of Lady Cathiel's voice. Her tone seemed hesitant as she looked up at me from beneath her long lashes. I turned towards her in question. She inhaled sharply and sat with her back tense.
"Why did you do it?" I raised a brow in question.
"What did I do m'lady?"
"Helping Lady Asteìla, Lord Rameron's wife." I sighed in exasperation. I was already tired of answering the same question over and over again.
"I knew what was about to happen," I met her eyes, "there was no way I could've turned a cold shoulder against someone's life." She returned the gaze. Her expression was one of confusion.
"You do not know whether they deserved the pain or not." I considered my answer. I truly didn't know at that time but still-
"I didn't at first but-" My tone was dubious, "-but now I'm quite sure they didn't. No one does, unless they killed someone or caused the death of someone, they don't deserve the same pain."
There was a tense silence. I shifted on my seat, turning to face the lady fully.
"You were just a maid. You could've been sentenced to death." I stared at her incredulously.
"I don't believe that," she opened her mouth to counter it but I continued, "and it has already transpired, there's nothing I or you can say or do to change it." She stared at me for a long moment before giving a small nod. For the first time in the last four days, I saw her lips curling into a small smile.
"You are a strange lady." I couldn't help but laugh at that. If I got a dollar for every time someone found my totally normal antics, in my opinion, strange I'll soon be becoming a millionaire.
"So are you," I replied lightly, not wishing the suddenly good atmosphere to shatter. Lady Cathiel smiled again and looked into the flame, settling into silence once again.
I snuggled back into the thick woollen comforter and mumbled a grateful thanks to Bnaŕia who was poking a rod into the gradually rising flame. Sleep had again evaded me for the most part of the night and I had an extremely irate day. Making an excuse for my throbbing head I had settled into the bed once again just as the sun was setting and the biting winds started blowing at the edge of the day. I wasn't exactly sleepy but I felt too cold in my cotton dress, which was now looking to be very improper in the mid of November, and the warm fireplace and soft wool of the oversheets had looked to be too comforting to resist. I stared out of the window as Bnaŕia shuffled around the room taking care of even the minute details. Before she herself settled on the small chair and warmed her hands on the flame. A knock on the door startled her out of her thoughts and she stood up abruptly to open the door. I looked over my shoulder to see Naimĺa standing before the door holding a paper wrapped large package. Her disapproval was imminent and her eyes swiftly took in the room before locating me and dropping into a stiff curtsy. I sat up slowly, more out of curiosity than anything else.
Bnaŕia looked back at me and I nodded to let her in. Grudgingly I threw off the covers and shivered as the cold air from the open door made contact with my skin. I swung my legs to the side and got up.
"M'lady, Lady Cathiel has sent this to you," I was surprised. After that little chat we haven't really talked although her attitude towards me had warmed a little and in many instances, I had her found her looking at me with a thoughtful expression.
"Lady Cathiel walks in the Gardens on the seventh level, sometimes, at the midnight. She wants you to join her today."
"She goes out of the house?" The maid rolled her eyes.
"She can't just live holed up in her room for years." She replied, "She just avoids the human company." I nodded and mumbled a small I'd love to! before Naimĺa swiftly dropped into a curtsy and moved out of the room. I was sure that my face was lit by a goofy smile because when I looked up I saw Bnaŕia smiling at me with huge joy mirroring my own. I couldn't help but let that small spark of hope be ignited again. Maybe, just maybe, I really will be able to find out what I am looking for.
I sighed and pulled the thick royal blue woollen coat around myself. My breath puffed into the foggy night as I waited in front of the gates of the seventh level for Lady Cathiel to arrive. The three guards eyed me with suspicion and I gave them an innocent smile before turning my waiting gaze towards the upcoming path. After almost ten minutes a sole figure came into view. The face covered by the shadow of the fancy hood and the dark skirt of the dress trailing a few inches behind the woman. The guards looked back and forth between me and the gradually approaching Lady Cathiel before realization dawned on them. They stood stiffly and gave a deep bow just as the Lady came to join us. She gave a small nod before moving into the gates and I followed her.
My eyes went around bewitched by the royal facade of the seventh level, so unlike and yet the same to the other levels. It was richly decorated by benches and decorative statues and fountains leading up to the great entrance. We turned a little before the entrance and headed towards the houses of healing and the gardens before it. The healing houses, which I had to visibly stop myself from exploring, were submerged in darkness only a few rooms lighted by the orange hues of fires. We turned to the left and headed into the gardens through the twisting and turning paths until we reached a small fountain in front of an ivy decorated bench. The Lady moved over and sat on the seat before gesturing to me to do the same.
We sat in silence for a while. I stared at the lush gardens taking in the serene beauty with awe. The fountain sparkled against the deep dark. The drop splashing around like crystals. The ivy twisted and turned around the polished marble forming intricate patterns. The-
"Lady Lanette," I tore my gaze away from the natural beauty and looked at Lady Cathiel in question. "why did my father want you to become my Lady companion?" I shrugged and looked back at the fountain. I had no answer for that as even I was wondering why. "He said that he feels you have much to learn." I cut out the from me part, not wanting to sound rude just yet. She stared at me for elaboration. I sighed and stared away. Quite ironic that the whole weeks I had been looking at her and she was looking away and now our positions seemed to be reversed. I just couldn't meet her eyes and even I did not know why. "He cares for you," I spoke softly, staring into the hazel orbs. Her eyes quirked in question, "Your father, I meant to say." She gave a scoffing sound and tensed. I wanted to make her believe that because I had seen that tired old man filled with regret a few days back. "He does, you know."
She took in my expression and then gave a mirthless laugh, shaking her head. Her black fringes bounced around as her head became free of the hood. "Then you don't know how many times he had forsaken me, Lady Lanette. For if you did you wouldn't be saying that." I quietened at that. The lady's tone was full of emotion, too deep to not indulge the listener. I remembered back to when Brilon had saidher father is embarrassed by her.. and wondered if the father really cared as I thought. Then why hadn't Brilon phrased his words well? "There is a ball soon," Her tone was now soft, more composed than before, "I got an invitation, like always," I coked my head to the side, facing her with almost my whole front to listen intently, "and also a note from my father saying not to attend as he cannot deal with the embarrassment." She finished looking at my incredulous expression. Was the father as much of a snake as his daughter was? Everything pointed to that but I couldn't shake that image of her father in his study from my mind. All that emotion had seemed too real for my comfort. I opened my mouth but was cut off by a small raise of her hand, "It was always like this, for the past many years." She faced the bubbling water. "Now tell me, Lady Lanette, if my father finds me to be dismay, enough to not want me to indulge in society, what does everyone else finds me to be?" I had nothing to say, "Maybe a disappointment, a hag or a waste of good money." She finished softly and wrung her hands in her lap. From the corner of my sight, I saw a lone tear leaving her left eye and falling into her lap. I inhaled sharply and placed my elbows on my knees and sitting in a slouched position. "A Lady who just disappeared from the eye or a lady with a severe lack of self-confidence, maybe?" I replied after a moment. She looked up to meet my eyes and I held the gaze wanting to validate a point. "Lady Cathiel, from what I see there is no reason for you to stay holed up in your house. You are perfectly capable of making decisions for yourself." I exhaled in disappointment, "it is your life. You deserve to make yourself happy." Lady Cathiel smiled softly, "And how can I do that Lady Lanette? How can I make myself happy when the world doesn't want me to? When the only label I have left is a failure? A hag? A disgrace?"
"Go to the ball!" I blurted out. We both sat in startled silence.
"Do what, Lady Lanette?"
I inhaled sharply, the idea of making more and more sense in my mind. "Go to the ball with confidence. Prove to them that you are not disappointed in yourself. Prove that it's your life and only you out of all the people in Gondor can have a say in it!" She stood up incredulously and moved to stand in front of the fountain. From that angle, it was easy to see the paling expression and tightened hands. "You want me to just barge into a party? What makes you think that my father shall take me?" Her tone was growing scathing. She took a step forward and stared at me with a cynical expression. "Would you beg him to?" and then she gave a light laugh, "or are you going to give a report back to my father how I am beginning to lose my mind in that cage! So that he can dispose of me in a moment. Or better! are you going to gossip to Brinielel so that she destroys the little authority I have left?!" Her tirade ended as a shriek. She leaned back at the fountain, visibly taxed at the breakdown. I stood up and took a few steps forward, stopping a little distance away to give her space. "Lady Cathiel, I am your lady companion, not Lord Dervorin's or God forbid Lady Brinielel." I took another step forward, "Whatever you and I talk about stays between us, that is what I can assure you of!" She looked up from beneath her wet lashes, "I cross my heart and hope to die." I had meant that as a joke but in the situation, my tone came out as a true promise more than a light-hearted comment. "What is your reason to help me?" I smiled, "So maybe we can both help each other against our demons?"
"Do you think it will work?" She asked timidly, "Going to the ball, I meant to say." I chewed on my lip contemplating my answer, "Honestly, I don't know. But I feel that if you don't help yourself no one else can." She exhaled softly. Leaving her leaning position she stood straight, looking more the lady she was than she ever had. "Father and Lady Brinielel will never agree to this." She said as we were moving back to the mansion. I looked at her sideways and smirked, "Who said that they need to know?" Even from beneath the velvet hood I could feel her incredulous look. She settled to shaking her head in exasperation and a small sigh.
In this little hour, we had become more friends than we could ever have been in that stuffy tea time.
"Honestly, you'll rock forest green," I said again making Naimĺa shoot me another glare. "I feel that my Lady looks best in Violet." She ground out. "But she always wears violet," I whined looking up at her. "She should not even go to the ball Lady Lanette. It is the worst idea you as her Lady companion could've come up with!" She snapped back.
"Quieten Naimĺa." The lady replied from the front of the room as she swings around in her dark green gown. "It is my decision and the way you are yelling every one we are hiding this endeavour from shall find out before tonight." She moved to the back of the screen to change into her less fine dress and I turned back to the delicious custard pie I was previously devoted to.
The lady looked much healthier these days than she had done a week before during our talk. We had become fast friends in the time while planning her grand entry to the November ball, which was occurring in honour of some sort of victory Lord Boromir and to a small extent Lord Faramir had brought home. We had agreed, even Naimĺa, on the point that it should be kept from anyone other than ourselves lest someone makes things hard for us. The ball was happening tonight and there was this sort of nervous and tangible energy around the room. No one knew the outcome but I was sure this night would turn out great for Cathiel.
She emerged a while later in her violet gown and swept into her seat as regally as possible. We sat in silence for a few minutes enjoying the warm tea and then chatted away about all the little topics until the sun began setting and Naimĺa called Cathiel to get ready. I gave her hand a small squeeze and whispered encouragement before leaving my room praying constantly that it will all end well.
I was woken from my deep slumber by the bang of my room's door and a frazzled Bnaŕia rushing in. I sat up and slowly rubbed the sleep from my eyes. She gestured around vaguely and mumbled incoherently. I swung my legs out of the comfort and stood up. I moved towards her with a filled glass of water from her side table. With a strict remark for her to sit, I waited for her to calm down before asking for the situation.
"Lady Cathiel she- It was a disaster- thrown out..." and then she promptly burst into tears. I should've stopped there to calm the little girl down but hearing that something had happened to Cathiel on a ball that had insisted for her to attend made my insides grow cold. The next thing I fathomed was me running through the grand hallway until I reached her rooms and burst through the doors. I saw Cathiel sitting on the carpeted floor near the crackling fireplace and Naimĺa holding her shaking shoulders. I quenched the sudden guilt at her broken image and stepped forward, the door closing behind me with a crisp sound. It alerted Naimĺa, who looked up from comforting Cathiel to my halted steps in front of them. I couldn't have prepared myself for the rage that entered her body right then. She sprang up to her feet and with two angry steps covered the distance towards me. "You!" Her fingers poked at my shoulder blades, "I told you that it'll end in a disaster. Told you to keep out of things you do not know about! But did you?" She grabbed my chin and sharply turned it to face Cathiel, "Look! Is this what you call a success? This is what I warned you against!" Cathiel took that moment to look at me. Her reddening eyes glazed with tears as she stared at my brown ones, I barely registered Naimĺa's voice, which had now grown soft due to tiredness, "Do you have nothing left to say?" Cathiel stared for an answer, her eyes searching mine. As if waiting for my mouth to form answers on its own accord, as it always did, but now I just stared at her helplessly with nothing left to say. "I-" I cut myself off and broke away from the gaze. At that moment I knew I had disappointed the only women who wanted my help. The guilt was running deep and whatever Brinielel had said days ago about me not knowing a thing about court came crashing back. I knew that this time, those tears were not exactly the fault of the Gondorian society that I doubted but the fault of my own false confidence and assurance. If I knew nothing then I should've just shut up and lived quietly. When I saved Lady Asteìla it had been due to pure chance not due to my own hands. I shouldn't have expected anything to turn out perfectly, after all, no matter how much it seemed to be, this was not a fairy tale but real authentic life in which my decisions can make or breaks others along with me. Overwhelmed, I dropped into a swift curtsy and left through the door. The last sound I heard being a quenched sob of Cathiel.
I laid restless facing the canopy of the bed. The cold winds blew outside seemingly seeping into the thick walls of the house. I got up along with the quilt and dragged it with me towards the crackling flame to get a bit of warmth. Soon I was lost staring into the deep red.
Last two days had been a long guilt trip. I've, rightfully, kicked myself for a mistake and had gone to apologize to Cathiel the very next morning but Naimĺa had been the one to answer the door and after a few scathing remarks, she had slammed the door on my face. With no other choice, I had come back and hoped against hope that she'll allow me to at least say a well placed sorry to Cathiel but to no avail which had led to me being angry as to why she was getting between our own matter until I heard the whole ordeal through Anaŕiel.
"I heard that it was fine for the first few hours into the ball," Anaŕiel said, stroking my hair as I sniffled with my head in her lap. "After the initial shock, everyone welcomed her, albeit hesitating, which was, of course, going to happen. She even got to chat and dance with a few men, it seems. Until when the toast was going to be taken, a few guards came in and caught her by the arms to drag her out. It imparted no little shock to the audience as it was highly improper but it seemed that Lady Radina, a close relative of Lord Denethor had pleaded to him to have such a sight removed from the hall. She accused the Lady Cathiel of threatening her and flirting with her spouse and many Ladies had seconded the notion." I leaned up and turned to stare at Anaŕiel cynically, "Cathiel would ne-" Anaŕiel dragged my head back to her lap and tucked a few strands behind my ear, "Child! How many times do I have to tell you? The court is run by the powerful. No matter how absurd that sounds, it the supreme say it, it is not absurd." I choked back a sob, "How is the life here so unfair? Is there no freedom?". She gave a soft sigh, "People who have freedom make the most mistakes because they learn practically in their life. In the court, those who leave any black mark of their lives opened don't survive, as people who love freedom do a lot." A moment of silence stretched between home, "Back in my worl- in my home, I had never experienced such pettiness. I had the freedom to live as I wanted, do what I wanted as long as I don't disappoint my parents I was happy. It is so sad to see everyone living their lives for someone else's eyes here." "Your home seems too good a place." Anaŕiel replied softly, "Yes, yes it was. Too good that I didn't appreciate it until I lost it." I said, wetting Anaŕiel's skirt with my wounded tears.
I tightened the covers around me just as the door opened. Knowing that it must be Bnaŕia, I didn't bother to look stood in front of the door for many minutes until I finally snapped and looked up to reprimand her. I stopped short. Cathiel and a very displeased Naimĺa stood before the closed door. Snapping out of the reverie I hastily made to stand up but stopped as Cathiel held up her hand. She came forward until she was standing facing me and sat down on the plush carpet. Her hands were folded in her lap and her skirt spread around her, dark green just like the fateful day. Her posture as regal as a lady of her status should have.
"Naimĺa, get tea for Lanette and me." Although her tone was still as soft and humble as before. "But-" She shot her a look and Naimĺa quietened. With another cynical but less angry look at me, she swept out of the room after a curtsy.
"Lady Cathiel-" I started after a few minutes of silence. "So I am a Lady once again?" I quieted. She sighed lightly.
"You were right," I looked at her in question, this time meeting her eyes. "This was something I had to do to save myself." I sat up straight looking at her with incredulity. "But what happened to yo-"
"That was inevitable." I chuckled in disbelief. "Inevitable?" I scoffed, "You were devastated."
"I said that it was inevitable, not that it didn't hurt me." I stared at her to elaborate which she didn't and then looked away to stare at the fire.
"I'm sorry," I mumbled later. "I-"
"Don't." my eyes snapped towards her. She held my gaze and then shuffled forward to clutch my hands in hers. "I don't want to hear your apology when what you said was right." I opened my mouth to disagree but she continued without breath,
"For the first time in last many years, I realized that people do not believe me to be a disgrace. It is only the clique of the friends of Brinielel that caused the misfortune."
"But the misfortune was too embarrassing!" I blurted out. She contemplated it for a moment. "You were kicked out!" I added instinctively. "I wasn't kicked out!" I raised a brow, "I walked out myself. It is true that the guards came but Lord Boromir politely came to my rescue and asked me if I would like to leave which I did!" I gasped in disbelief. "That son of a- He asked you to leave! On the basis of a complete lie. What a great commander he must make!" She swatted at my hands, "What language! He did it politely, at least." We stared at one another and then promptly burst into laughter. We were still cracking up, on things that weren't funny enough to be laughing about (maybe we lost a few screws in the past few dramatic days), when Naimĺa came back with Bnaŕia. Her eyes swept over us and when I was expecting a scathing tirade her eyes took in the pure joy on Cathiel's face and for just a faint second I saw them soften before she saw me noticing and tried to harden her expression but to no avail. I gave her a small smile and murmured a sorry which she accepted flustered.
I sipped on my tea as I listened to the pure joyful experience Cathiel was sharing
"-after years I danced and drank good red wine. Laughed among the new company and felt pretty in my old dress! I was truly mad at you for the first day but when the blind anger wore off I realized how truthful you were. Thank you so much, Lanette!" She smiled which I reflected. "Well, I really thought that I had led you astray for the first day. But now I am so glad that you finally seem to come out of your shell!"
"Although," she gave a light laugh, "I won't do that again." I raised a brow. "Why? Because you finally can?" My tone was sarcastic. She shrunk her eyes and inhaled. "Do you think I can? I mean the rumour-"
"Who cares?" I rolled my eyes and placed the empty cup on the table, "if you cared about the rumours then you shouldn't have gone to the ball." She still looked torn. "Look Cathiel, That day you quenched so many rumours. Like the ones of your disfigurement. What if another rumour circulates. Everyone knows you don't come out of the house, even if Lord Denethor didn't, they won't believe it." Her expression turned a bit sad, "Lanette, when the guards came in to drag me out, I first looked for my father. I-" She inhaled sharply, "I thought that he'll help but when I found him and I looked into his eyes, he just shook his head and turned away pretending as if he hadn't seen me. As if I didn't exist and turning away will make me go away. It really hurt." Her eyes glazed over before she gave a mirthless laugh. "I should've known." A few days back I would've been double minded. I would have still believed that he cared for his daughter but now looking at the hurt on Cathiel's face I only felt a surge of anger. How many double-faced snakes would I face? Did he only assign me to Cathiel so something I do embarrass her? I scoffed at the thought making everyone look at me.
"So we should prove to him that turning away won't make you go away." She raised her brow. "How can I Lanette? I don't even want to see his face." I smirked as I looked back as Bnaŕia, who after seeing my expression shrunk her eyes in silent question. "I heard that there is going to be a winter festival in a few days." Cathiel gave a laugh in disbelief and Naimĺa choked on thin air. "I don't think that's a good idea." Bnaŕia, for the first time in two weeks, commented incredulously. Just as I straightened to reply Cathiel's voice interrupted from behind, "Well I think that's a great idea!" My head snapped towards her mischievous expression and I laughed, "I second that!" I raised my hand to the effect and the room burst into laughter, although Naimĺa and Bnaŕia were more exasperated than mirthful.
As I looked into the lively look of Cathiel I wondered how had all the ladies of clique managed to keep such a lively soul under bounds. I asked Naimĺa the same thing when I was going back to my rooms and she accompanied me on my request. "She would still have been under bounds, Lady Lanette. Had it not been for you."
"Me?" I questioned curiously. She looked to the front not wanting to meet my eye.
"You have that quality m'lady, the one that inspires confidence and loyalty without a word." I bit my lip, not knowing how to reply. Never had I ever heard someone say something so deep about me. "It makes me wonder," I gazed at her sideways, "what was the atmosphere you were brought up in to have such open ideas about life? From where did you learn such confidence and attained such smarts?" I looked back at the front. "I was born in a society very different from this," I mumbled softly before quickening my step. I knew that if I strayed too long on such a topic I shall be cornered where I wouldn't be able to answer anymore.
To be continued...