"I have a complaint."

Captain Magno eyes me with amusement. "Oh? and what would that be?"

I point to Dita. "She keeps following me into the bathroom."

"I heard that men have this tube between their legs, and I wanted to see how it works!" Dita protests.

My eye twitches. "Do you not have a nudity taboo on Mejare, or is Dita just that thick?"

The captain glares at me. "I don't like you referring to my crew that way."

I grit my teeth. Who does she think she is?

The captain. Duh. Try not to get spaced.

I stuff my anger down and put a neutral face on. "I apologize, but my point stands."

"We do have a 'nudity taboo' as you put it, but I don't think most of us would extend that to males." Magno responds cordially.

"Does that mean I can just walk into the girls' bathroom anytime I want to and stare at them?" I ask in a deadpan tone.

"Absolutely not." The captain turns slightly towards Dita. "Dita, you can't go into the men's bathroom. it's impolite."

"Okay." She seems genuinely remorseful.

Without thinking, I reach over and rub her head. "Hey, cheer up. Maybe you'll get to examine a male some day. Maybe ask the cooks before we get eaten."

"We don't eat men."

I turn slightly to see Meia. She's glaring at me.

"I know that, I'm teasing her." I say. "Nobody believes that women eat men."

A screen opens up, and Bart's face appears in the air over the bridge. "They don't?"

I stare at him with my mouth open. "Are you serious?"

"Well, dad always said-"

"Do these," I gesture to all the women on the bridge. "Look anything like the horror stories that Tarak jammed down our throats?"

"...I guess not."

"Tarak and Mejare are pushing an agenda of hating each other. Obviously, we need to take their words with a lot of salt." I glance around the bridge. Aside from Erza being missing, the rest of the crew is here, including the giant bear costume. "That goes for the women too."

"You can't give us commands." Meia says menacingly.

I glare back for a second before raising my hands in defeat. "Fine. It was a suggestion, then."

Meia still looks like she wants to tear my throat out, so I turn and head for the door. "I'll be in my bunk if anyone needs me."

Dita follows after me. "Mister Alien! Can I really see your tube?"

I smack my face. "You idiot..."

"I want to see!"

"Look, if you asked to see, I don't know, Ezra's crotch to see where her baby is coming from, would she say yes? Do you think it would be acceptable to ask?"

Dita looks confused. "But that has nothing to do with this."

"It does." I turn to face her fully. "Hey, do me a favor and tell me about how relationships work on Mejare."

Dita smiles brightly. "Okay!"

We head all the way to my bunk, Dita explaining the whole way.

"When two women like each other very much, they get married. That means they're exclusive to each other. Normally, one of them acts as an Ohma, and the other as a Fama. Occasionally, two Famas or two Ohmas get together, but it's rarer."

"I though every woman could be a Fama." I comment.

"They can, but a lot of Ohmas are completely disinterested in becoming Famas. They decide never to have children, so they get named their role in the process."

Interesting. "Do unmarried couples have children?"

Dita sags slightly. "Yes." She says a lot more quietly.

Okay, land mine. From that reaction, I bet that she's the daughter of two unwed women, and that negatively affected her life. I change the subject. "So... how does your society view nudity? Captain's answer wasn't very in-depth."

"Your naked body is something you're only supposed to show someone you're married to." Dita says, instantly perking up and pointing a finger in the air as if she's lecturing me, a smile plastered on her face again.

"And that is why I can't show you my body." I say with satisfaction. Thank god Mejare isn't a free love kind of planet, or I would have lost that excuse. We get to my bunk and I sit down on it, and start sifting through my bags. Dita sits down beside me with a confused look.

"But... I thought we were going to get married?"

...Huh?

HUH?

"What? No! What gave you that idea?" I stand back up and face her.

Her face isn't showing she's hurt, just confused. "Because-"

The alarms start buzzing, drowning her out.

I turn around and bolt for the door. "We'll continue this later. I need to see what's up."

I head for my Vanguard, Dita on my heels calling "Wait!"

I get into the Vanguard and launch. The Paksis sends me a slight chill, letting me know it hasn't forgotten the first time I climbed into the modified Van type.

Dispatching the enemies is easy, and I spend my sweet time getting back to the Nirvana.

I need to figure out what to do with Dita. I didn't realize just how bad she had it for Hibiki. I know in the anime Dita said she had fallen in love with Hibiki the first time she met him, but she thought they were getting married all the way back at the start? it's only been a few days!

I remember that she had a bad time back on Mejare, but what the hell kind of environment produced that attitude?

I need to have a talk with BC. She's the only one I can trust to give me a unbiased opinion, ironically.

I drift past the bridge, and I can see the bridge crew staring back out at me. I wave and do a loop, then head back to the docking bay.

I had initially planned to head straight to BC to ask about Dita, but once I open hatch to the Vanguard, I find a worried Dita and an angry Meia.

"Meia."

"Your solo performance was too dangerous. Next time, wait for orders."

I scratch my chin. "I didn't have time to get orders."

"And you thought you could take them all yourself?"

I sweep my arms out to the sides. "Obviously, I can."

"You mean, your Vanguard can. It's not you that's great, it's the machine."

I glare at her. "If I wasn't in it, it wouldn't do anything."

A now-familiar chill stabs at the base of my spine. Not now, you stupid sphere.

"You need to get back in your place."

I hop off the gantry onto the deck floor, marching right up to Meia. "And where would that be?"

"You are our prisoners. Don't forget that."

I clench my fist. Don't punch her, it will make your life worse. Don't punch her, don't punch her, don't punch her. "Fine. I'll defer to you. Let's hope it doesn't get us blown to kingdom come."

She narrows her eyes, but she leaves without saying another word.

"Um... Meia is a good leader." Dita carefully starts speaking. "You should listen to her. Really."

"I know, Dita." I slump down to the ground. "I'm just not good with people yelling at me."

"Me neither."

I check my calendar once I'm back in the cell. The plasma door isn't powered up, and I'm free to leave, but it's still the cell.

I've been here all of four days, if you count that chaotic day when the Ikazuchi launched as the first day.

Something they never covered in the episodes is how long they journey was. I remember that stating from the second half, it was about ninety days of travel, but the first half has no time scale to speak of.

I know Christmas comes up, but I don't even know if that happens in the first or second season.

Four days. I'm counting starting from the day of the year I left my home, supplemented by my phone's calendar. It continues to count the days naively, as it has no network to connect to.

Dammit, Paksis, if you're going to upgrade things, make it so my devices work with the ship I'm on.

If I assume that each season was half of the journey, that means that the entire trip lasts about one hundred and eighty days. Since the last two episodes they've arrived at Mejare and Tarak, that means... about eight days between important events.

I am going to get so bored.

Being curious by nature and an engineer by trade, I thought I could get along with the engine crew, but they turned me away. Turns out, they barely accept having Duelo around, and that's because Parfet enjoys spending time with him.

The bridge crew doesn't exactly like me either. Especially Cel.

What else is there on this ship? Security is managed by either BC or Meia, neither of whom would like me on that end of a laser ring, I'm sure. I'm okay at baking, but I can't cook, so that's out. I could work in the registry, but I'd have to wear a maid uniform.

Hibiki spent his time maintaining his Van type, but he was a mechanic with intimate knowledge of how they work from his job before being abducted by pirates. I'm sure I'll have to figure out how to maintain the thing, but where can I get the skills?

I hear knuckles on my doorframe.

"You wanted to see me?" BC asks.

"Yes." I turn around and sit on my bed, gesturing to a stack of boxes against the wall for her to sit on. "It's about Dita."

"Dita? I was sure you were going to ask about Meia."

"Meia? Why?"

"She raised a complaint against you, for undermining her authority."

My jaw drops open. "But... I said I'd listen to her commands."

"She says you were insubordinate even while saying that. Something about a castle."

Castle? I replay the conversation in my head. Oh, kingdom come. "I'll have to apologize to her, I guess. She's doing her best."

BC gives me a strange look again. "So, what is it about Dita?"

"I was talking to her, and she..." I bite my cheek. "She seems to think we're in a relationship. I was wondering why happened to her that she'd form, or at least claim to form a deep attachment from so little."

BC narrows her eyes. "You don't know? I thought you could see the future."

"I told you, I can't." I fiddle with my sleeve. "All I know is that Dita was on that decommissioned section of Mejare. When I brought up unwed couples, she also seemed down."

BC shakes her head. "Your knowledge is so mysterious. I didn't know Dita was on that section myself, yet you come to me asking for information."

"So, you don't know?"

"No, I don't."

"I don't suppose you have a therapist on board."

"Aside from Paiway, we don't have any medical personnel." BC thinks for a second. "Duelo is a good addition, since he's a real doctor."

"But he wouldn't have Dita's records. Oh well."

BC clears her throat. "Anyway, I have news for you. Since Meia doesn't want you working under her, you've been transferred to the registry."

"...But I don't what to wear a skirt."

BC raises an eyebrow. "That's your complaint?"

I shrug. "It'll keep me occupied. Once I figure out how to appease Meia, I'll come back to the active fighting unit."

BC takes a single step back and scrutinizes me again. "You seem to get along well with us women."

I smile. "Yup."

"You weren't born on Tarak."

"Nope."

"...I'm going to get the full story out of you eventually."

"Maybe."

"Alright. Head down to the registry. Gasco will tell me if you don't show up."

"It's not Gasco, it's Gascogne!" I say under my breath, a slight smirk crossing my face.

Apparently, not under my breath enough. BC shoots me a look before turning and walking off.

Okay, time to head down to Reg.

It's a long walk.

Somewhere along the way, I start to hum to myself. A simple tune, nothing complex.

"Oh, it's you."

I turn to the side to see Meia join me heading down the hallway from a side passage. I continue humming to myself after acknowledging her presence.

After a full minute, Meias teeth grind audibly. "What are you humming?" She demands.

"Uh, sorry." I apologize automatically. "It's 'Closer' by the Chainsmokers."

"Well, stop, it's bothering me."

"Of course."

The next minute is spent is silence, the two of us taking several of the same turns. As the silence is starting to irritate me, I break it. "Are you headed to Reg as well?"

She raises an eyebrow. "Why would you need to head to Reg?"

"I'm being transferred." I shrug. "You'll have me out of your hair for a while."

Her glare is stabbing into my head. What? I thought she'd be happy with that turn of events.

"I thought you said you'd defer to me."

"I did. It's not like I asked BC to transfer me..." I stop in place and let my jaw hang a bit loose. "Wait, are you mad that the decision got taken from you?"

Her face ornament twitches as her cheeks color slightly and her frown deepens. Looks like I hit the mark.

I school my features to keep from laughing. "Well, the final decision will of course be yours. I doubt BC actually put through any paperwork yet."

This seems to mollify her somewhat.

What was Meia's deal again? Her Ohma wasn't home much, they both died due to her Ohma's experiments, and because of the packed rocket, she got claustrophobia. Both her parents died, and she became a punk to cope until she got recruited to the pirates.

I can't recall where she got her control issues from, but I remember that Jura isn't able to take over the squad when she goes missing.

We get to the Registry before anything else can be said. Most of the girls there eye me curiously. Meia heads over to Gascogne and starts talking in hushed whispers.

"Isn't that one of the males?" Comes a voice from the side.

I hold my head still, pretending I didn't hear.

"It is! Why is here?"

"Maybe they're making him pilot a Dread!"

"No, that can't be. He must be helping Meia get her Dread ready."

"I heard it got modified by those crystals, so it doesn't fit into our old bays anymore."

God, I forgot how hard it is to ignore gossip. Not to mention that they're stage whispering. I can clearly hear all of it.

Gascogne walks up to me, Meia behind her a few steps.

"So, I hear you're transferring to Reg?"

"So I've been told." I put a polite smile on my face. "It seems I've left a bad impression on the actual fighters, but I have to be useful somehow."

I can see Meia grinding her teeth.

Gascogne crosses her arms in front of her without accentuating her bust. "And you think you'll be of any use down here?"

"I don't see why not." I shrug. "I can lift heavy stuff in the back, or if you're short on..." I look around at the maid uniforms. "...waitresses, I can help with dispatch. Just don't make me wear the dress."

Gascogne smiles. "But you can't be a part of Reg without the uniform!" She turns around and heads towards the back. "Hibiki, follow me."

"...Yes ma'am." I grouse.

There's a changing room in the back, and Gascogne slips a red dress like thing, a white shirt with poofy sleeves, a pair of white gloves, a pair of pointy white boots, pantyhose, and most disturbingly, padding.

Specifically, padding to fill out the chest of the costume.

Don't get me wrong: I like cosplay. I have a sort of respect for those guys that cross-dress at conventions, and have considered doing it myself. It's just, I've never considered having to wear pantyhose.

At least I don't have to do anything like balloons for the chest area. Just a lot of cloth.

It's not that hard to put on, all said and done. For not actually measuring me, Gascogne got my size surprisingly close.

I step out to find that the entirety of Reg is waiting expectantly, with the addition of Meia.

Why is she sticking around?

"That's more like it." Gascogne smiles, the metal stick in her mouth pointing upwards with the motion.

"You're really going to force me to wear this." I exaggerate being off-put.

"Okay, now there's a few things you need to know about the Reg." Gascogne continues without acknowledging my remark. "One: Those terminals over there allow you to set up the various menus. Two: You need to memorize what each of the pilots likes to use. Three: We recommend the Kamikaze set. Forth and final:-"

"Don't forget to smile." I finish for her, scratching my head. "Why do you recommend the Kamikaze set? We don't know how long it's going to be until we get home, so why would we risk more... pilots..."

I look around the bay. Everyone is giving me a weird look, partly frightened and partly curious. Meia manages to add a good dose of anger on top of those.

"What? What did I say?"

"How did you know about the smile thing?" One of the girls to the side asks timidly. She's got a light blue shade of hair.

"Oh." I wrack my brains for an out. "BC told me when she told me to come here. She said that the smile is the important thing."

"Really? BC said that?" Another of the girls, this one with black hair muses. "That doesn't sound like the vice-captain."

"And how did you know about the Kamikaze set?" Gascogne says with her eyebrow raised.

"Well, duh. Kamikaze is generally ascribed to suicide attacks."

The blue haired girl steps up to me. She's clearly nervous. "Um..."

I smile politely. "Yes?"

"We recommend it to remind the pilots that they need to come back. Nobody is actually supposed to pick it."

"Oh. I... guess that makes sense." No, it doesn't, but I'm trying not to stir up trouble. "I don't think we've met. My name's Hibiki."

Amazing how easy changing my name has been. I offer my hand and she grabs it, the handshake thankfully not lost in translation.

"Oh! I'm Zan."

Zan...? I've heard the name... "Oh! Dita told me you like to sing."

Out of the corner of my eye, I can see Meia and Gascogne give each other looks.

Zan smiles, her tension draining slightly. "Oh please, I'm not that good."

"That's not what Dita said." I decide to tease her a bit. "Why don't you sing for us right now?"

Her cheeks color. "I couldn't possibly-"

One of the other girls, one with brown hair, grabs Zan's hand. "Come on Zan, you haven't sung since we left we started this mission!"

Gascogne coughs. "We're on the clock ladies. No time to be goofing off."

"Okaaaaay" Comes a chorus of voices.

Gascogne steps up to me. "Looks like you'll fit in just fine."

...CRAP. It just hit me, a major reason Hibiki didn't stay with Reg was because he didn't fit in at all.

"Hmm, since you need to learn the procedures, let's have Zan teach you. You already know her, so it should make some things go smoother."

"...right." I sigh. How do I fix this?

"What happened to your enthusiasm?"

"Ah, just... Nah, I'll be fine for now." I head over to Zan's desk. "It looks like I'll be in your care." I say.

"Oh, okay."

We spend the next hour going over the most common sets used, and learning some of the pilot's preferences. The Nirvana has a lot more pilots than I'd imagined, about fifty.

I wonder how many of them make it home.

I start practicing, and it turns out my acting classes had come in handy. I can cheerfully smile and recommend someone goes and kills themselves.

I notice that the other girls are basically just talking among themselves in their downtime, so once I'd basically proven I could handle the job, I decided to slack off a bit.

"Hey Zan. What songs do you know?"

Zan blushes slightly. "I... I know most of Merfre's songs, and I am good at picking up a song quickly."

"Really." I'll have to listen to Merfre later. "So, if I sing something, you'd be able to pick it up?"

"I..."

I take a deep breath.

Hey.
I was doing just fine before I met you.
I drink too much and that's an issue,
But I'm okay.

Hey,
Tell your friends it was nice to meet them,
But I hope I never see them again

I know it breaks your heart,
Moved to the city in a broke down car, and...
Four years no calls,
And now you're looking pretty in a hotel bar
And I~ can't stop
No I~ can't stop

So baby pull me closer in the backseat of your rover
That I know you can't afford;
Bite that tattoo on your shoulder
Pull the sheets right off the corner
Of the mattress that you stole
From your roommate back in Boulder
We ain't ever getting older

I stick my tongue out. "Yeah, I know, I'm not good at sing-"

"That song sounds so pretty!" The Brown haired girl says.

Zan nods her head. "Is that song from Tarak?"

I hesitate. "Not really. I mean, yes, but it's not all that popular there. Most people wouldn't of heard it." Hopefully, that excuse will get me through any questions about how odd my stuff is.

"Wow. What other songs do you know?"

"Um... Actually, let me get my phone. I can play you the music."

I get some odd looks, but none of them try to stop me from heading into the changing room and grab my phone, opening my music application.

The six girls on duty all crowd around to see the relatively tiny screen. This means various bodies are touching me. I hold as still as I can to avoid any "Incidents." I cue up Closer, and let it play.

The girls are entranced by the music. I let it play to it's conclusion, and start scrolling through my list of songs for what to play next.

Five of the girls start chattering excitedly, but Zan narrows her eyes.

"Um..." She looks like she's trying to gather courage for something. "If that was from Tarak, why was there a female singer?"

My blood runs cold. I must be a colossal idiot. "Ah. I... That's really, really hard to explain." I look at the five others, still talking about the song... and my phone, for some reason. "Look, can you keep it a secret? I'm still trying to get the hang of..." I bite my tongue.

"S-Sure." Some color comes to Zan's cheeks.

"Anyway!" I say much louder. "Let's play... 'If You Only Knew' by Shinedown."

I made sure to only play song with males in it from then on. After an hour or so of goofing around, Gascogne comes back.

She gives all of us a scolding and we go back to our positions.

"Let's see how you do, Newbie." She says to me.

"Welcome! Here's is our easy to read menu. Today we are recommending the Kamikaze set. Do you know what you'd like to order, or do you need a few minutes?" I raise my right hand to shoulder height, close my eyes, tilt my head, and plaster my now-overused polite smile across my face.

"Hmm, I'd like the Glittering set." Gascogne says while rubbing her chin. "But add two extra missiles."

I cue it up and Gascogne watches as I type in the order.

"Er..." I turn to face her, as she's come around the counter. "I'm sorry, but the Glittering set doesn't allow for extra missiles."

Gascogne takes a step back and narrows her eyes. "So? I want extra missiles."

I wrack my brain over the sets we offer. This is obviously a test to see how fast I can think on my feet. "Would you like to try the Unicorn set instead? It has more missile room, but is less maneuverable."

Gascogne nods her head. "You pass."

...Wait, wasn't my goal not to pass?

Goddammit.

A few more days pass, and I get all sorts of acquainted with the Reg. I end up doing inventory, mopping, and practicing for combat.

We've had one combat since I've switched units, but it wasn't the one with the sea urchin, so I'm not doing anything too out of order, I hope.

That's all well and good, but I don't have any plans for getting back to the fighter unit. Not to say that I wanted to stay in the Reg, but...

But I'm not the complete fuckup Hibiki was in canon, and that's screwing me over. Gascogne hasn't really had anything bad to say about me, so that's a plus.

There's ten girls that regularly work in Reg, and I've learned some of their names:

Zan, with light blue hair, eyes to match, and a shy personality. Likes to sing in her spare time, though I haven't convinced her to sing in front of me yet.

Endoa is the black haired girl who was talking to me my first day, with brown eyes and a love of sweets

Yola is the enthusiastic brown haired girl, apparently a lifelong friend of Zan.

Nur wasn't on duty my first time in the Reg, a reddish pink haired girl with gray eyes. She's mostly quiet, but she liked my singing.

Right now, Zan and I are doing inventory in the back.

"Hey, Hibiki?"

"Mmm?"

"Why did you transfer to Reg?"

"Oh, I... kind of pissed off Meia."

"I-I see. She's scary sometimes, isn't she?"

"Not really." I mark that we have exactly three-thousand, four-hundred, and sixty-five guided rockets. "She just feels the need to be in command. When things don't go her way, she doesn't know how to handle it, and she takes it out on others."

Zan pauses her work. "Wow. I didn't know that!"

"Yeah, well, it's obvious if you have any knowledge of psychology. I'm not really an expert, but I'm fairly sure I'm right."

"How about..." Zan thinks for a second. "BC?"

I raise an eyebrow. "Why her?"

"You seem to talk with her a lot."

It's true. She keeps pestering me to reveal more, or do some odd job or another. I'm sick of her face. "Yeah, you'd think she'd be too busy to pester me given she's the vice- captain, but whatever. Hmm, she's got a realistic attitude, which seems rare for Mejare. More militant. She wants people to do their jobs, but realizes people aren't perfect. I think that's the biggest distinction between her and Meia."

Zan writes something down. "I've never thought about it like that."

"Don't fret over it. It's a skill I picked up, but nothing I'm properly trained in." I laugh slightly. "I could be completely wrong, though."

Chatting with Zan is kind of nice. She's not afraid or suspicious of me anymore, and doesn't try to pry into my past. Most of my shifts have coincided with hers, and given the rotation that will continue for a while longer.

"Oh, yeah, I forgot to ask. Do you have any of... Merref's music that I could borrow? I'm curious as to what Mejare's music is like."

"You mean Merfre's? I have a CD, but..." She hesitates. "I only have the one, and it's precious to me."

"Ah. Nevermind then."

"B-But... If you want... I can bring my player and the disk, and we can listen to it while we work?"

"That sounds good." I nod my head.

"Mister Alien!"

Dita's voice comes from the main area. I wave bye to Zan and head out to see what she wants.

What I get out, she thrusts a boxed lunch to my chest, causing the fake breasts to shift oddly. "I found out the kind of food you normally get on Tarak, and I felt sorry for you, so I made you lunch!"

It's true I've been living on those Tarak food pellets, but I don't really mind the poor taste. It fills you up, which is what matters. "Er, thanks. You didn't need to do this."

"Mister Alien, when are you coming back to the fighter unit?" Dita starts to pout.

"I'm part of Reg now..." Wait, this could be my opportunity. "Why?"

"I want to combine with you again!"

My eye twitches, and Endoa tilts her head in confusion. "Combine?"

"Yes! Mister Alien and I get together, and it goes swoosh and bang and then we're really close-"

I clap my free hand over Dita's mouth. "You... frigging innuendo factory."

I release my hold in time for her to question "What's innuendo?"

The ship lurches, and BC's voice comes in over the intercom. "We're under attack. All members to their stations!"

I smile weakly at Dita. "Look, I'll see what I can do, but the people in Reg are counting on me."

Dita's bright smile comes back. "Of course! We're counting on you out there too!"