Back with yet another exciting chapter. And boy is this one a doozy.
A big, gracious thankful to my wonderful readers and reviewers.
Trigger warning for those who are sensitive, have PTSD, or have difficulties with traumatic events: this chapter will contain acts of violence, as well as attempted sexual assault and implications of spousal abuse and spousal rape briefly alluded to. You have been warned. I advise my readers to approach these subject maturely and delicately. These are serious subjects and not to be taken lightly.
If Someone Cared Enough
Chapter Seven: Escalations
"Hurry up everyone!" Hagrid called out as he lumbered past the first few train cars, "Bes' be gettin yer luggage on the train before the las' whistle blows. Firs' years need help liftin their bags; come on now, prefects."
Lily took one last look at the castle looming in the distance and sighed. Another year—another hectic, tiring and emotionally draining year—down and she was going home. Home to be doted on by her overprotective parents and either insulted or ignored by one very foul tempered and petty sister. A part of Lily debated whether staying for even more teenage drama would be preferable to Petunia glaring at her over toast and jams every morning. She could picture it now, her sister's long neck tucked down between her bony shoulders, thin lips pursed into a tight line while she sniffed derisively as though the way Lily stirred her tea was somehow offended the Queen herself.
As if reading her thoughts, Mary laughed, her eyes following Lily's gaze up towards the castle, "I think it is too late to ask if you could stay for the summer, Lily."
Lily sighed heavily once more, "I know. I guess I'll just have to resign myself to a very dull and unpleasant summer of no magic and all the sisterly scorn a girl could ask for."
"Any hope she's possibly come around to the idea of magic since last summer?" Mary asked, somewhat joking, somewhat hopeful.
Lily shook her head, "Doubtful; she hasn't changed in the time I was gone any other year, so why should now be any different? Still, would it kill her to write even a single letter? I would even take a sarcastic 'Dear Lily, try not to get eaten by a dragon this year.' At least then I could say she cared. But nope! Every summer I come home and every summer she locks herself in her room or looks down her nose at me while telling her snobby friends that I go to some sort of…reform school for delinquents!"
Mary patted Lily's back, "That's got to be rough."
Lily worried her lip between her teeth, "I hadn't really thought of it before now, but Petunia is probably going to make things with Severus more complicated too. How am I supposed to talk to him with her hanging around waiting with a cutting remark about his clothes or his looks? She seems to take pleasure in pointing out just how poor he is. I can't exactly clear the air with her insulting us from the other room. And as for tackling his issue with muggles; good luck! If anything, Tuney will just further push him into that mindset and I'll never get through to him."
"Don't you two have some sort of special hang out place?" Mary questioned, "Yeah…that place by the water, right? Covered by that big tree you like to sit under."
Lily nodded, "We do, but we haven't sat under it together in a year or two," she admitted, "Things were already getting a little strained between us before this year. We kept arguing more and more. Besides, I'm not sure if I want to bring him there before we have some things worked out."
"How do you mean?" Mary asked, putting the last of her luggage onto the train storage compartment.
"I don't want to repeat any of our old routines because I don't want to give Severus the impression that we can just let things go 'back to normal'. This isn't like one of our usual fights where we forgive each other and just move on and bury all the issues we were having. I don't want him thinking things can return to how they were like always. If I bring him to the tree and we sit there together like old times, I'm worried history will repeat itself and it will be just like all the other times we have fought," Lily looked searchingly at her friend, "You know what I mean?"
"You don't want Snape to think things haven't changed," Mary stated understandingly.
Lily snapped a finger, pointing at Mary eagerly, "Exactly! If we treat this like nothing's changed, he'll shut me out like he always does. I don't want him to close up again. Then things will never get better. We have to clear the air. I need to treat this like a new experience for both of us, something we've never done before. Then maybe he'll see that this time things are different." Lily side stepped a few younger students playing in the corridor as she entered the train.
"Want me to come over?" Mary joked, "Then it really won't be like any fight you two have had before."
Lily snorted, "Because that would go over so well. Merlin's soggy left nut, this is hard."
"Lily!" Mary gasped with false shock.
"Well it is," Lily insisted, "I had this whole thing planned out in my head, but now that we actually going home and I can put it into action, I have no idea where to actually start. I mean, what if he doesn't even want to talk to me now? I've ignored him for days and I used that name on him just like everyone else. What if he thinks I'm on Potter's side now or something?"
"Considering how much you've avoided Potter since he pants Snape, I highly doubt it Snape is going to think you've gone all 'team Potter'," Mary drawled, "You saw him when you left to talk with Simone; he misses you. Hell, he's dying for a chance to talk to you now," Mary jerked her head at something behind Lily, prompting the redhead to turn around.
About a train car away, Snape stood among the chattering masses. Every so often he would glance Lily and Mary's way before ducking his head back down, as if he wanted to catch Lily's eye but was afraid to be caught staring.
When he looked back up, Lily met his gaze dead on. Giving him a halfhearted smile, she mouthed 'later' at him. She pointed to her trunk and mouthed 'at home'.
Surprise lit up Snape's features for a moment, his eyebrows shooting to his hairline. Something like hope flittered across his face for the briefest of moments and then it was gone, his expression closing off once more. Giving Lily barest nod of his head, he turned and headed off to find a compartment, followed not by Mulciber or Avery surprisingly, but rather Simone's friends from Ravenclaw.
Mary smirked proudly, "See, I was right. He's dying to see you."
"Yeah," Lily mused, "and it looks like Simone has people on escort duty in her absence again," she gestured to the departing Ravenclaws.
Mary watched the students leave down the train corridor, "You're right. Where is she anyway?"
"Oh, from what I've heard, Simone and Thea never take the train," Lily explained, "A house elf picks them up the school gates so they don't have to take such long travel."
Lily recalled seeing Simone when she and Mary where first getting into the carriages to head to Hogsmeade station. Simone had been traipsing across the lawn with Thea in tow, both clad in regular wizard wear instead of their school robes. Simone's robe had a sort of translucent lace like quality to the bottom and Lily had glimpsed a pair of fine dragon hide boots with pointy heels peeking through the thin material, prompting her to wonder how anyone could walk in those things. Both girls' hair piled high on their heads with lace shawls draped over their shoulders, they looked more like they had stepped out of the fashion section of Witches Weekly than two students returning home for the summer.
"That girl has to do everything differently, doesn't she?" Mary muttered, "What's wrong with taking the train? It's the last hurrah with friends before summer break."
"I think Simone and Thea can afford to travel and visit all their friends over the break," Lily pointed out as they weaved in and out of the crowd of students in order to find a compartment for themselves.
Mary pouted, "Lucky, wealthy jerk," she pressed her face against the window of one compartment's door, hands cupped around her eyes to peer inside the foggy, dirty glass, "This one looks empty."
"Good," Lily breathed a sigh of relief, heading inside and getting situated. While most of her luggage had been stored elsewhere on the train, her remaining trunk carrying her change of clothes for home was going up into the compartments overhead luggage rack, Lily grunting a little as she hefted it up.
Just as Mary was about to shut the door, a hand shot into the compartment and blocked her.
"Ladies," Sirius said smoothly, pushing the door open to allow for him and James to fit through, "What a lovely surprise, me and James were just looking for a place to sit."
Behind Sirius, Remus and Peter were standing around looking unsure of themselves.
James mussed up his hair, turning to Lily with a grin, "So Evans, I was hoping we could stay in touch this summer." He made to sit down.
Mary stood in the center of the compartment, her hands firmly on her hips, "Oh no. No, no, no. This place is taken, Potter. Go find somewhere else to strut around like a prized peacock." She pushed James away from the seat he was moving towards and steered him to the door.
"Oh come on, Macdonald!" Sirius said casually, "There's plenty of room to share. Plus don't deny you love me." He gave her a cheeky grin, already sprawling across a seat.
"We just thought we'd make some friendly conversation," James added, "Nothing wrong with that, is there?"
"More like you're here to flirt," Mary huffed.
"And that would be a problem because...?" James asked teasingly, looking over at Lily to flash her a charming smile and a wink.
Lily took a deep breath and stood up, brushing imaginary dust off her skirt as she went, "James, I really would rather it just be me and Mary right now."
James' smile faltered, "But I thought you and me could talk," he said, "You know, really get to know each other."
"Why, because Snape's out of the way now?" Lily asked, "Potter, I've made it perfectly clear before that I do not like your behavior, so what makes you think I would be eager to be friends with you after what happened by the lake."
"But...I told you I'm going to change," James sputtered, "And I had nothing to do with what Snape said to you."
'Well you did a wonderful job antagonizing him,' Lily thought, "I'm not blaming you for his actions, but that doesn't make yours any better. If you really are going to change, I would like to see evidence first before you try and cozy up to me. Really James, trying to move in on me while I'm upset is sort of like taking advantage, don't you think?"
James blanched, "T-that's not what I was trying to do."
"James if you really care about me, you'd give some thought to my feelings. I lost a friend, I'm hurt. This is the worst time to try and come in acting charming and trying to win me over. It's insensitive, especially when I can see how gleeful it makes you to have Snape out of the picture," Lily stated firmly.
"What's the big deal," Sirius asked with a yawn, "It's just Snivellous; you should just get over him already."
Lily glared at Sirius, "Just because we had a falling out, doesn't mean that I suddenly find that name funny, Black," she said harshly, "It's infantile and petty and I won't put up with it."
Sirius rolled his eyes and shrugged, "Whatever."
"Now, I believe I've made my point quite clear," Lily went on, "Mary and I would just like to be alone for now, alright?"
"But Evans," James began.
"No buts, James. If you really wish to be my friend, then please give me some time to deal with some things and prove to me you can change," Lily insisted.
"Right, you heard her," Mary said, "Out with you all," she grabbed Sirius by the ear, dragging him up from the seat.
"Ow, ow ow!" Sirius cried, trying to pry Mary's vice like grip off his ear, "Let go!"
"Out," Mary repeated, dragging Sirius to the door and pushing him out.
Mary then turned to James, "Well?"
James held his hands up in surrender, backing out the door and being careful to stay out of Mary's reach, "I'm going, I'm going. I'll...see you around, Evans."
Once the boys were outside the door, Mary shut it with a satisfying thump. "Now, how about a game of Exploding Snap?" she asked with grin.
{page break}
The girls played and talked for the first half of the trip, giggling and teasing one another. When the trolley came by, they helped themselves to ice mice and chocolate frogs. Mary also got herself some licorice wands, which Lily absolutely abhorred the taste of.
The train was nearing home—only an hour or so left of a ride—when their compartment door swung open unceremoniously.
"Black, we're still not interested in hanging out with you," Mary growled, going to slam the door shut.
"Well good thing we ain't Black then, ain't it?" Was the unpleasant reply.
Mulciber stood ominously in the doorway a smirk plastered across his face.
"What do you want?" Lily demanded, standing up quickly. Under her robes, she clutched tightly to her wand.
Mulciber shrugged, "Just thought I'd come by and see how my favorite Mudblood was doing," he said. He leered at Mary, "Alright there, Macdonald?"
Mary glared at him, swallowing her disgust, "Piss off, Mulciber."
"Oh, and here I thought you and I had become such good friends," Mulciber joked, "Guess we'll have to do some more bonding," he reached into his robes.
Thinking fast, Lily drew her wand and went to point it at Mulciber, "Stupefy—,"
"Expelliarmus."
Lily's wand was torn from her grip and sent spiraling into the air.
Lily could only watch in horror as her wand landed in the hand of the one who disarmed her.
"Now that's not very nice," Avery drawled, leaning against the door frame. He twiddled Lily's wand between his fingers, "didn't your filthy muggle mum ever teach you any manners?"
Lily grit her teeth, "Didn't your mother teach you not to pick on people?"
Avery smirked, "As a matter of fact, no. She didn't really have a problem with how I treated my lessers."
"What a lovely person she is," Lily snarled, her teeth bared.
Mulciber laughed loudly, "She's a far better woman than you muggle lot." He had accioed Mary's wand during Lily and Avery's exchange of words. A firm grip around Mary's forearm, the burly boy sneered down at the girls, "Now, I do believe we were going to get better acquainted."
Avery nodded, "That's right. We've been dying to have some fun." Stepping fully into the compartment, he closed the door and spelled it shut. Pulling down the blinds on the windows, he waved his wand and a dull humming filled the room, the outside noises in the corridor falling eerily silent.
He grinned nastily, "Just so we won't be overheard. Nicking that spell from Snape's book was the best thing I ever did."
"So it's not just his homework you steal, but his spellwork too," Lily fumed, "He does everything for you and you steal from him? Some friends."
Avery shrugged, "It isn't a balanced relationship, but it suits me just fine. Besides, whoever said we were friends? Snape's just...convenient. Now...what can we do to you two? A hex? A curse? I'm sure you'd both look just wonderful puking up slugs."
"That's too juvenile," Mulciber said, "Make maggots crawl under their skin. Or better yet, make their blood boil."
Lily glared up at Avery, "You two really are foul excuses for human beings, aren't you. Picking people, tormenting them. You're complete creeps."
"Flattery will get you nowhere," Avery replied, "Besides, there's no one to stop us."
"Severus would," Lily insisted, "He'd be downright furious if he knew you were bothering me."
Avery smirked, "Snape's no longer got use for you, my dear. Remember? He cut you loose and has finally accepted how worthless your blood makes you."
Lily shook her head, "You're wrong."
"Oh, and how do you figure that?" Avery taunted.
It was Lily's turn to sneer, "You think you know Severus, but you don't. He only lets you see what he wants you to see. As if he would show you the real him. You're just stepping stones in his own goals. You took advantage of him so that he would do things for you and you think you'll take credit for his hard work. But he'd never let you do that. He's not giving you any of his real secrets. You're just getting the scraps; the skills and secrets he thinks insignificant enough to toss you."
Avery's face twisted, "Watch what you say, Mudblood."
Mulciber laughed, "Looks like the cat's got claws."
"Shut it!" Aavery snapped at his cohort.
Lily wasn't through with Avery, "You think you're using him, but he's using you too. He's smarter than you and twice as talented and you can bet he's going to recognized for it. No one would ever believe someone like you to be that brilliant. And that's why you keep him under your thumb; because you know he could actually be somebody someday, while you would be no better than a vagrant in the real world if you didn't have your family name to fall back on. Without that, you'd be nothing and it eats away at you to know a halfblood is twice the wizard you ever were."
Avery's face warped with rage, "You..."
Mulciber guffawed loudly, "Turns out the bitch can bite too."
"YOU SHUT IT," Avery roared, flushing scarlet, "How dare you talk to me like that, you little bitch."
Lily held her head up proudly, trying to hide her fear as the boy bore menacingly down upon her, "I'm only stating what you already know."
Mulciber continued to laugh, "She told you what for, didn't she?"
"We don't need to put up with the likes of you," Lily stated, "I'm asking you to leave."
Avery smirked, "What if we don't want to?"
Lily narrowed her eyes, glaring at him. Reaching for one of her bags, she turned to Mary, "Come on, Mary. We'll find another place to sit."
"Who said you could go anywhere," Avery began, grabbing a hold of Lily's bag, "We're not done here—"
Avery never got to finish his sentence.
Without warning, Lily whirled around and slapped Avery clean in the face, "Don't touch me or my things!"
"Why you little!" Avery lunged forward. Getting an arm around Lily's waist, the pair tussled in the cramped compartment.
"Lily!" Mary cried in alarm. She would have come to her friend's aid but a hand closed painfully around her wrist.
"Now, now," Mulciber chided, waving his wand at her, "We wouldn't want to get in the middle of that, would we?"
Avery attempted to grab a hold of Lily's hands, but Lily was having none of it. Flailing around like an angry cat, she threw elbows and punches at whatever part of Avery she could reach. One well placed hit managed to connect with Avery's eye painfully, causing the boy to recoil on instinct.
With Avery's hold on her loosening, Lily took her chance and landed a good blow to the bully's nose.
"Shit!" Avery cursed, holding his bleeding nose.
Mucilber was practically in stitches from laughing so hard, "Who knew a mudblood was a better fighter than you, eh, Avery? And a girl at that!"
Avery's snarled, his lip curling back like a wild animal, "That's it. I've had enough of this little tart." He lifted his wand, eyeing Lily carefully. A strange look passed over his face and he leered at her, "It's time she did something useful..."
Lily's eyes widened, "What are you...?"
Avery took a step towards her, his wand raised as he looked her up and down, appraising her.
Realization hit Lily like a ton of bricks. "Mary, run!" she cried, making a break for the exit.
"Petrificus Totalus," Avery's spell hit Lily full force, sending her toppling to the ground, still as a statue.
"Lily!" Mary yelled. She struggled furiously in Mulciber's grip.
Mulciber grunted as his captive got him in the stomach with a well placed elbow, "Stupid chit, Imperio!"
Mary went slack in his grip, her eyes glazed over and blank.
Avery raised a brow, "Really, William?"
Mulciber shrugged, "What? We're already taking it this far, why not use an unforgivable?"
"Well if you must, but personally I find taking hold of the persons mind like that robs you of the pleasure of them suffering through every moment," Avery replied, talking like he was speaking to a slow child, a tired distaste in his tone.
"Nah, I like it better this way. She much more cooperative this way. I could make her do anything if I wanted," Mulciber explained, looking at the pliant girl in his arms with glee.
Avery tsked, "Do what you want," He nudged Lily onto her back with his toe, "It won't make much difference I suppose; we're just going to obliviate them anyways."
Lily could do nothing but watch in silent horror as Avery leaned down and picked her up, his hands straying to her backside as he took on her weight.
Propping her up against the seats, Avery grinned, wide and threatening, "I'm going to enjoy this."
As Lily looked on in terror, Avery grabbed hold of her robe and wrenched it open.
"Nice," Avery said approvingly, taking in Lily's shape beneath her blouse, "You can never see shit with these robes. You've got a nice figure. Let's see how nice." He reached for her shirt and tore it open, buttons flying away with the force.
Lily tried to scream but it was to no avail. She couldn't open her mouth, so the sound was too soft. Even if she could scream, the spell Avery used on the compartment would ensure nobody heard her.
Across from her, Mulciber was pulling Mary into his lap. With a perverse chuckle, he fondled her backside and tugged her skirt, licking the side of her face lecherously.
"Nice," Avery said, dragging Lily back to her nightmare, "Very nice," He cupped one of her breasts in his hand, squeezing harshly.
"Tacky bra, though," he went on, "Cheap. You think that lace will cover up what a classless bint you are, Muddy?" He brought up his other hand and held her breasts firmly, bouncing them slightly, weighing them in his hands as though he was comparing produce at a fruit stand.
Lily shrieked, but it was too muffled to make much noise.
"Now, now, no need to be shy," Avery chided mockingly. He tugged her bra down and cupped her bare breasts, "These are some fine ones you've got here. Nice and plump; they fill the hand quite nicely."
Tears burned Lily's eyes. Every part of her was screaming to run, to thrash, to do anything, but she was helpless. She bit back a whimper as the tears finally spilled over and ran down her face.
"You've got quite the body hidden under those stuffy robes, Evans," Avery was saying. He leaned in close, his breath fanning across Lily's face as he gave her a cruel, cold smile, "Why don't we see what's under here?" he asked, reaching under her skirt and sticking a hand between her legs.
Lily let out what would have been a near inhuman screech if it weren't for the spell on her. Instead it was a distorted gargle of muted sound.
It was like watching a horror movie, but she was the victim in the film instead of part of the audience. Her body had become a cage, trapping her in one long drawn out moment of terror and violation.
Her eyes darted to Mary, her dazed friend sitting with Mulciber, her shirt open and her skirt tugged up, unaware of her surroundings.
Lily sobbed, her eyes burning with tears as she felt Avery's fingers pull at her knickers.
And that's when the compartment door opened...
{page break}
Snape wandered the train searchingly.
After a few hours of hanging out with Davis and the other Ravenclaws and Hufflepuffs in their compartment, Snape was taking some much needed time to himself.
It wasn't that he disliked Davis or his friends. In fact, the studious bunch appeared to have quite a bit in common with him when it came to an avarice for learning. Their hunger for knowledge rivaled his own, which was unsurprising. In the past Snape had avoided Ravenclaws because while their thirst for knowledge was admirable, they tended to be better at memorizing the knowledge than applying it. They knew the facts but not how to use them. Snape preferred his companions capable of thinking things out critically on top of their knowledge. After all, knowledge was knowing that a tomato is a fruit; wisdom was knowing that it still didn't belong in a fruit salad (A/N: recognize this quote and get a cookie!).
Davis and his friends though were different. Ever exploring and questioning, the group asked how and why, rather than just taking a fact at face value. They wanted to know how something worked and what's more, what else it could do that hadn't yet been done. Their inventiveness was a breath of fresh air for Snape, who had spent most of his school years being scolded for his risky potion experiments or shunned for the spellwork he created.
Still, as much as he appreciated their company, Snape was an introvert at heart and there was only so much socializing he could take in a day. So when his ….friends?...had nodded off one by one, he took his chance to sneak away.
Now he roamed the halls enjoying the relative silence. Most students were in their compartments, resting or relaxing for the remainder of the ride. The few who did loiter in the halls were younger kids who were easily scared off with a well practiced glare.
Snape scanned the compartment windows as he passed, looking for familiar faces. Without Simone around, he would have the freedom to talk with Avery and he knew the boy had been looking for him lately. Simone kept Snape in the common room until Avery went to sleep back when they were at school and she was glued to him during the day so he had been effectively banned from all contact with the older Slytherin. Now she was gone and he could seek the other boy out.
He knew he would need to make a decision soon. Avery said that sixth year was when he really started looking for new recruits and he didn't like to be kept waiting.
Snape felt a little guilty. Simone would be right pissed to hear he was still thinking about it. He knew Simone believed nothing good would come from joining his side, but it wasn't like she really knew what the cause was all about, right? She wasn't close to those in the know, the ones who had met him, so what if she was wrong?
And what other choice did he had? A nobody halfblood from a poor muggle hovel, no connections, no favors to call in. He even had a life debt hanging over his head thanks to that damn Potter. He would never make it in the cut throat reality outside of Hogwarts unless he put his lot in with those of power. What future would he have otherwise? No one on the light side was going to stick their neck out to give him a leg up in the world.
He peered into another few windows. Still no Avery. Where could that lummox be?
In truth, he had enjoyed the space from Avery and his friends. The group was all very simple minded. Their ideas were few and most thoughts unoriginal. They were lazy and had no value for hard work or ingenuity and if he was frank, their startling lack of intellect was infuriating when combined with their empty headed, obnoxiously loud laughter. Mulciber was like a braying donkey!
Still, he needed them if he was going to make it in life. When he first came to Hogwarts, he had initially hung out with them because of his lack of friends and a need for protection from the ruthless older years; Bellatrix and her propensity for curses coming to mind. But then, the pair had proven useful, their promise of a place among the Dark Lord's chosen few was too tempting to pass up for a unnoticed, unpopular boy that the would spit up and chewed out.
Still, Simone wouldn't approve if she knew he was out here looking for them. She had been so adamant that all he would find was misery if he continued on down this path. But what did she know? She was wealthy, acknowledged, and—from what he could tell of her mentions of her parents—loved and cared for. She had everything, whereas he had nothing. What did he have to lose when he already had lost what mattered most to him.
Or did he?
Snape paused, uncaring of the first years who had to skirt around him nervously to get to the other end of the hall.
Lily had smiled at him today. Really smiled at him. It was strained and small compared to her usual beaming grins, but the warmth in it had been real. She had barely spared him a glance in days. But today she had looked at him, really looked at him. She'd sought out his eyes and held his gaze, piercing right down into the depths of his soul as only she could. Whatever she found there, he did not know, but it must have been worth something to her, as she had smiled at him and sent him a wordless message; they would talk once they were in Cokeworth.
If Snape was honest with himself, he had been quite convinced Lily would never speak to him again. What he had done was unforgivable and it would not be fixed like when they fought in their younger years. with a few days of her cold shoulder and then some enchanted paper flying like birds sent to charm her into forgiveness wouldn't work this time. He knew how much that word bothered Lily, he couldn't fault her for it. It was appalling to think anyone would accuse Lily of not belonging at Hogwarts. Her talent was indisputable, unquestionable. She excelled at anything she put her mind to, and woe to anyone who questioned it in his presence. Even among the Slytherins it was well known; Lily was off limits.
Snape frowned, Avery had been ecstatic when he heard about Snape's falling out with Lily. For years the brutish boy had insisted Snape would grow tired of Lily and her...ill breeding, but Snape had always ignored him or just rolled his eyes and played along. Let Avery think the friendship would end after Hogwarts; so long as he didn't bother or pressure Snape to drop her now. He'd think of a way to convince them Lily belonged in his life once he graduated.
But Avery had been over the moon. So much so that he had foregone his usual 'curse practice' on the younger Slytherins the day he heard about the Lake incident. If Snape reconciled with Lily now, it was doubtful Avery would take it well.
Snape shook his head, continuing on his way.
What could he do? He couldn't bare the thought of not having Lily in his life, but Avery had made it clear there was no room for her in whatever sort of future was promised to him for his services. What could he possibly do? It came down to a choice and it was one agonizing for Snape to make. Could he really give up everything for Lily? A girl who would likely never see him as anything more than a friend?
On the other hand, would he be able to live his life, no matter how successful it might turn out, without Lily in it?
Before he could deliberate on the matter more fully, something caught his attention. The section of the hall he had wandered into was empty, devoid of the usual student hustle and bustle, but there was a noise lingering in the air. A sort of buzzing sound, a low sort of din reminiscent of a bee or the hum of a lamp.
Snape knew this sound. It was one of his own spells at work. But who was using it? Snape growled; it better not be Potter again. After the scene by the lake, Snape had vowed to keep his things better hidden, but with how easily Potter and his lackeys always found him, who knew what sort of trickery they had at their disposal to uncover his secrets?
Curiously, Snape followed the sound, listening carefully..
He traced the noise to its source, a closed up compartment with its shades drawn where the humming was at its loudest. Reaching for the handle, he wasn't surprised to find it locked; anyone using his spell most likely didn't want to be discovered.
Drawing his wand, Snape muttered one of the more complex unlocking spells, very sure that anyone willing enough to steal his spell wouldn't use just any enchantment to lock the door. It unlocked with an almost inaudible 'click' and Snape reached for the handle again, prepared to face the culprit and give them a well deserved thrashing for daring to use his spells.
Canceling the muffliato, Severus yanked open the door and stepped inside without a second thought, wand at the ready.
The scene that greeted him inside was not what he expected to find.
{page break}
For a moment, everything was still. It was silent save for Lily's quiet hiccups.
Avery had been caught off guard, so like a deer in the headlights, he stood there not moving, hands frozen on Lily.
Mulciber blinked stupidly at Snape, not sure what to do. In his arms, Mary's head lolled sideways, her curly brunette locks falling over her face.
Severus stood rigid in the doorway. Unsure how to process what he was seeing, he looked at Lily. He took in her torn shirt, her white pale breasts standing out sharply in contrast to her black robes. He took in Avery's hands and where they lingered on Lily's skin. He took in Lily's wide watery eyes, so filled with fear and anxiety, tear tracks streaking down her cheeks.
As if he was a child again, Snape found himself standing in an open doorway, looking on in shock at his crying disheveled mother as father clutched her by the hair, one fist raised above his head.
Suddenly all Snape could see was red.
"Exeplliarmus!"he shouted.
"The hell, Snape?" Avery narrowly ducked out of the way, "Have you gone mad?"
"How dare you," Snape growled, "How dare you!" he fired another spell, which Avery barely managed to get out of the way of.
"What's the big deal," Mulciber said, drawing his wand and coming to Avery's aid, "She's just a mudbloo—,"
"DON'T CALL HER THAT!" Severus roared, spittle flying from his mouth. He made a vicious slash in the air with his wand, and Avery bit back a hiss, his arm sporting a large gash.
"You bastard. Who's side are you on?" Avery snarled.
The trio began an all out duel right there in the compartment. Hexes flew left and right, deflected to ricochet off walls and bounce off the ceiling. Snape unleashed a barrage of curses at the pair of larger boys, yelling and screaming obscenities at them. Practically foaming at the mouth like a rabid dog, he unloaded as much fury as he could with each and every slash of his wand.
"You," he swung a curse at Avery, "Will," he sent a volley of hexes as Mulciber, Never," he parried one of Avery's curses, "Touch her," another cutting hex at Avery, "AGAIN!"
At this point, it was more Snape dueling and Avery and Mulciber barely managing to block them. Beating Snape in a duel was hard on a regular basis; fighting him when he was out of his mind with rage was something they had never encountered before.
As the boys fought, Lily finally felt the effects of the spell on her wear off. Huddling against the seats, Lily reached shakily for her wand which Mulciber had managed to lose track of in the fight. Pointing it at Mary, she managed to choke out a weak 'Finite Incantatem,' at her friend.
Mary slumped backwards against the wall, the glassiness of her eyes melting away.
"What...?" Mary mumbled, "What's going on?"
Above her, a hex zoom over Avery's head, leaving a deep scorch mark in the wall.
"Shit!" Mary cried, crawling on her hands and knees to huddle besides Lily and escape the burning wallpaper fluttering to the ground.
"Confringo!" Snape shouted, aiming at the pair of Sytherins.
"Protego," Mulciber began.
"Langlock!" Snape fired back before he could finish moving his wand.
Mulciber's spell died on his tongue, the muscle literally stuck to the roof of his mouth.
"Expulso!" Snape cried.
The curse connected head on with Avery's shield. Lacking the added strength of Mulciber's shield, the boy was thrown backwards against the wall, hitting it with a thunderous crash, falling down to collapse in a heap on the ground.
"Expelliarmus," Snape aimed the disarming spell at Mulciber, who was waving his wand and mouthing ineffectively.
The lumbering oaf of a boy took the full force of the blow, crashing into the window and landing on the ground, dazed.
Lily wrapped her arms around herself, staring at Severus in shock. She had never seen him this way before. It should have been frightening, it should have been absolutely terrifying, but all she feel was a deep seated sense of relief welling up inside her. 'You came for me...'
Breathing heavily, Snape stared down at Avery and Mulciber's prone forms. Hesitantly he took a step forward, and then another, wary that one of them may get back up. He kept his wand raised, trained on the two as he approached.
Hate filled his senses, so strong it was almost unrecognizable. It took over his thoughts, polluted them, the cloying stench of it clinging to him like an inescapable cloak.
He should end them, he thought. It would be all too easy. No way they could be allowed to walk free from this. Not after what they had done.
He raised his wand.
"Sev..."
The plaintive cry behind him pulled him away from his spiraling thoughts.
"Lily," he turned towards her, his eyes falling on her shivering form. She clung to the tattered remains of her shirt, having managed to tuck her breasts back into her bra. She looked so small there on the floor, her face red and blotchy, eyes bloodshot and lost.
Hastily, Severus shrugged out of his robe. "Here," he said, holding it awkwardly out to the redhead.
He turned to Mary, unsure.
"I'm good," Mary said softly, her eyes glassy. She pulled her robe from off the floor and wrapped it around herself, hugging it like a blanket.
Snape turned back to Lily, his robe still held out to her, "Lily?"
Lily looked down at the robe. Slowly, she reached for it only to pause.
"Take it," Severus implored, "You need to—."
In the next second Lily flung herself into Severus' arms.
"Sev," Lily whimpered, "Oh Sev!"
Her shoulders shook and Severus realized that Lily was crying. Cautiously, he wound his arms around her. Unsure what to do with his hands, he chose to place them on the back of her head, petting her hair. He was out of his element here. He recalled old movies his father used to leave on where people comforting someone would shush them, soft and whisper-like, but it didn't seem appropriate to him. He doubted the last thing Lily needed right now was to be silenced.
"Sev," Lily sobbed again. She repeated his name, over and over like a mantra anchoring her to reality, grounding her to the fact that she was no longer trapped, that worst was over.
Mary got to her feet on wobbly legs. She stepped towards Snape, seeking comfort in closeness, but not sure if his offer to Lily applied to her as well.
Severus looked up and met Mary's eyes over Lily's head, "Macdonald..." he began.
"Sectumsempra!"
Everything seemed to slow down. Snape pulled back from Lily's grip like he had been pushed. Shock overtaking his features, he fell backwards, hand going to his neck as blood spurted from underneath his fingers, a red streak arcing through the air. It seemed to take him forever to fall to the ground.
Avery stood by the window, wand still raised, a triumphant and wicked grin on his face.
"SEV!" Lily shrieked. She fell to her knees besides her friend. Reaching for his neck, she clamped her hands over it, crying and screaming futility.
"Shit," Mulciber said, stumbling to his feet.
"We need to go," he told Avery, "We don't want to be here when the train pulls into station. We'll go to Azkaban for this. You can't obliviate killing someone as easily as you can for touching a few girls."
"No but we can try," Avery sneered, pointing his wand at Lily.
He was just about to utter the spell when a commotion came down from the other end of the train car.
"Lily!" came Remus' frantic voice, "Lily, is that you? Are you alright?"
"Shit," Avery echoed Mulciber's previous statement, "Time to go."
The two Slytherins sprinted out of the compartment, just as Remus and his friends reached it.
"Hey," James said, "What are they doing here—oh Merlin!" His eyes fell upon the sight just beyond the doorway of the compartment.
"Please, help me," Lily begged, "I-I need to stop the bleeding...there's too much, i-it won't stop," she dissolved into a fresh wave of sobs.
Behind her, Mary was collapsed on the floor white as a sheet, tears falling silently down her face.
James eyes raked over Lily's ragged appearance, "...Are you okay? What happened?"
Lily only cried harder.
"Lily..." Remus said shakily, trying to remain calm, "You need to calm down. We'll help you," he turned to James and Sirius, "We need potions, fast."
"I-I'm on it," Sirius said beyond bewildered, he took off down the hall.
"And go get help!" Remus called after him.
"Got it!" Sirius shouted back.
Remus knelt down besides Lily, "Lily, my mom's a nurse...let me see what I can do..." he carefully pulled Lily's hands away and replaced them with his own.
"We need to keep pressure on the wound," he said, "We can't stop the bleeding fully until we get the artery closed."
"But he's lost so much blood," Lily cried.
"Is there anything we can do for that, Remus," James asked worriedly.
"Oh," Mary gasped, "I-I have something." She crawled towards her bag, producing a dainty little purse from inside. Frazzled and half scared out of her wits, she struggled to open it until Peter came over and assisted her.
"I've got blood replenisher," Mary explained, holding up a small vial, "For emergencies." When she had first packed it, never did she think she would need it for something like this.
James took the proffered vial, turning to Remus for guidance.
"Open his mouth and pour it in," Remus instructed, "Slowly."
James did as he was told.
A few seconds went by agonizingly slowly.
"It's not helping," Lily fretted.
"It will," Remus assured her, "It just needs time. Where is Sirius with those potions?!"
"I'll go check," James offered. He took off like a bolt of lightning down the hall.
By now, all the shouting and screaming had called quite a bit of attention. Students poked their heads out of other compartments, some confused, others curious. They converged upon the scene quickly, students in the back straining to see what was going on.
Lily clutched tightly to Severus' shirt, "Sev...Sev, you've got to hang on. Can you hear me? Hang on!" She peered into his eyes and was dismayed to find them blurry and unfocused. She became alarmed when they began to flutter closed.
"Sev?" she called, lightly patting his face, "Sev?!"
"Where is Sirius?" Remus shouted in frustration.
Lily shook Severus frantically as his eyes fell closed.
"SEV!"
This given some of my own personal history, this was not an easy chapter to write. I hope that my readers were not caused too much distress by this chapter. If so, I apologize.
It was very important to me before writing this story that I give great thought to this particular scene and how I wished to proceed with the aftermath. Rest assured this attack on Lily and Mary will be brought up in later chapters, addressing the impact it has on them and those around them. It will NOT be used as a cheap ploy to get views and then dropped as soon as possible. It will NOT result in Lily and Severus being physically intimate in the near future under the cliche guise of the victim trying to heal by seeking physical comforts with her love interests. I HATE, HATE HATE when writers do that. One chapter a character is raped or nearly raped and the very next chapter, they have sex with the love interest because the writer felt it would be 'good' writing. Sexual assault is a very serious subject and should never be written in for shock value and thrown out once it achieves the desired effect. You must follow through with the subject, how it affects the victims, how they recover, what lingering affects it left. Treat. It. SERIOUSLY!
I decided to include the implications with Severus parents because it is a common trait of abusers to sexually assault their spouse or SO without it being acknowledged as such. Society, especially during the time of this story, was under the impression that if you are married to someone, consent is automatically given permanently and can never be retracted, so abused spouses often times go along with sex when they do not want it because they believe it is expected of them and something they just have to do.
I hope my viewers stick with me through the following chapters. You all make my days so much brighter :)
Read and Review.