"Where have you been? I've been looking for you everywhere!"
All Hermione could see as she entered the dormitory was a flash of red hair as Ginny approached her in a couple of fast, long steps and wrapped her arms around her. It was obvious her friend had really been concerned... how would she react now, if she revealed all she had been doing during that time?
"I'm alright, Ginny, no need to be so worried," answered Hermione, sending Ginny a rather reassuring smile. "My detention... just took a bit longer than..."
"Honestly, 'Mione, is that... that idiot going to torment you like this for the next month just because you said something wrong to him? Well, he certainly should learn how to control his emotions, shouldn't he."
Hermione did not answer, feeling her cheeks go red. Now she understood how difficult it was to hide her emotions. Puzzled, she hoped she would not reveal too much to her friend, even though she was aware of the fact that keeping it all away from Ginny was simply wrong. Ginny deserved at least her honesty.
However, at the same time she knew that if she told Ginny everything, it would be the end of their friendship. And without Ginny by her side, she would no longer be able to survive this difficult year at Hogwarts.
"Let's go to sleep," suggested Ginny. "It's late already, and we have a difficult day tomorrow."
It was hard not to agree with her. Fridays were probably the most difficult of all days of the whole week, which meant a lot, considering the fact that it was their N.E.W.T.s year, and it meant that every day brought loads of work with it.
"Yes, you're right," replied Hermione, then found her night gown. "What do we have tomorrow?"
"Double Charms, double Transfiguration and double Potions," said Ginny, who was already changed into her pyjamas. "And you'd think Fridays should be free."
"Not anymore," Hermione chuckled, putting her night gown on, then slipping into her bed. It was good to be back to the normal life.
It was almost as if she lived a double life – when she was with Ginny, she was just a normal student and lived a life she had always known. And then, in the evening, she was no longer a student but a mysterious woman she did not know who had saved someone's life, and she was slowly falling in love with him, even though she knew she should not. Her life was already complicated enough – she did not have to add anymore to it.
However, at the same time she could not forget that her life would not finish with her graduation. After she had finished her education, she would need to live her life on, and if fate was giving her a chance right now, why would she not take it? On the other hand, was really a chance? Or maybe a trap?
"You seem upset," mumbled Ginny from her bed, glancing over at her friend. "Are you certain you're alright?"
Hermione wished she could tell Ginny – it would make everything so much easier; she would not have to deal with her problems by herself... but she knew that it was not a problem like any other. Revealing this problem to Ginny would cause consequences that could be unpleasant to both of them.
"Positive," she answered with a small nod. "I'm just tired, that's all."
"Why am I not surprised," Ginny laughed, then pulled her blanket almost over her head. "Good night, 'Mione."
"Good night, Ginny," replied Hermione.
However, she did not fall asleep right away. She lay there, staring at the ceiling and thinking. Although she had thought that it would be even more difficult now, as she had allowed Snape to kiss her again, she realised that her mind was much calmer now – and it troubled her for some reason.
"You're seriously going mad, Hermione Granger," she said to herself in a whisper, then closed her eyes and slowly fell asleep.
It was quite early in the morning when she woke up, but Ginny was already awake and out of her bed. Seeing that, Hermione quickly got dressed and climbed down the stairs to their common room to find her sitting in one of the armchairs, reading something.
At this hour the common room was usually quite desolated, and so it was this time – there was no-one but the two of them now. No wonder Ginny heard her friend's footsteps. As soon as she did, she raised her eyes to look in the direction of the noise.
"Good morning, 'Mione," she said gently. "I thought you'd sleep some more... you haven't been sleeping well as of late."
"I'm fine, Ginny, no need to be worried about me," responded Hermione, sending Ginny a reassuring smile. "I'm honestly well rested today."
"Sorry," muttered Ginny, "I just cannot help but feel that something... something's really wrong, and I don't know what it could be. You're all happy and smiling, but... maybe... maybe I'm just overreacting, sorry."
At that moment Hermione felt even more guilty than before. She wanted to shout it out loud that there was something seriously wrong about her and her relationship with their Potions master, but she dared not. It made her such a bad friend, but at the same time, she believed that she was saving their relationship.
"I guess you might be tired, Ginny," answered Hermione, reaching her hand out for Ginny to take. "Come, let's grab something to eat."
It felt terribly wrong to keep lying to the only person she had in the whole school, but she knew it was the only way she could act. At least for now. Then, she would find a way to explain everything to her, maybe she would understand...
"Maybe in the afternoon you'll find some time to respond to the boys," said Ginny, apparently quite amused, as they walked through the corridors. "Can you imagine that they wrote to me in the evening and asked why you hadn't replied to them straight away? As if they'd completely forgotten what it was like when they were at school!"
"Maybe they have," answered Hermione, laughing out loud – and it was a genuine laughter. "They're having the longest holidays in their life, so I guess this is their only worry: whether I have replied or not."
"I wish I had a chance to do the thing they have," mumbled Ginny. "I wouldn't have to study everything... and maybe I'd really have my Fridays off."
"But you might never get to know the spells you're going to learn," noticed Hermione. "Besides, it's just one year. Just a couple of months, really. And honestly, I've never had a better time than here, at Hogwarts."
Ginny glanced at her friend and smiled softly, then nodded.
"I still don't understand... how you could muster enough strong will to get back to school when you could have just started your job, and you'd probably get a wonderful one, since you are considered one of the greatest heroes of our times."
Hermione felt her cheeks go red.
"I just want to finish school," she replied shyly. "That's all. I feel like reading books cannot give me the same education as teachers, you know? And we have wonderful teachers here."
"Yeah, especially a certain Potions master," said Ginny and a laugh followed. Hermione forced herself to laugh as well, though her stomach turned a kind of a strange somersault, making her feel sick.
They reached the Great Hall. It was almost empty at this hour, because it was still quite early for the students to have their breakfast. There were only a couple of them, as well as just three teachers at the High Table – Professor McGonagall, Professor Flitwick and Professor Sinistra, who had taught them Astronomy.
"I wonder if Snape's going to miss his meals today, too," mumbled Ginny as she reached for a couple of toasts. "It would be so much easier, you know. Without him to look at during meals I feel much calmer."
"You'll have to look at him during our classes, Gin," reminded her Hermione, but Ginny just waved her hand.
"I know, I know, but still. The less Snape, the better the day."
Hermione nodded, but this time, she could not even force a smile. She wondered if Ginny would ever understand her behaviour and choices, then, if she hated Snape so much.
Well, Ginny had every right to hate him – he was biased and rude, and nothing had changed since before the battle. One would think he would be a better man, but he was still the same cold, unfair person he had used to be.
On the other hand, why had everyone assumed a person's change could be so sudden? Snape was but a man – he had his flaws, and fighting them would take time. And Hermione had noticed some changes in him... but it had happened during their private time together, and even though she would like to share it with Ginny, she knew she could not tell her anything. Because even if she claimed Snape had changed, Ginny would require proof...
"But don't you think," she started after a while, not sure whether she was doing the right thing, "that even though Snape is... well... Snape, he's a good teacher?"
Ginny grimaced. It was obvious she was fighting an internal battle with herself.
"Alright, alright," she answered finally. "He... might be a good teacher. Still, I would rather like a worse teacher who wouldn't keep on bullying us."
"I'm not quite sure," said Hermione, her voice quiet and full of thought. "I mean... I would love it if Snape wouldn't keep on bullying us, but I think we can stand him, and it's better if he teaches us more... and better..."
"I simply can't believe you're the one saying such things, 'Mione," chuckled Ginny. "I mean... you're the one he's bullying the most. How can you still be so undestanding towards him? You should be the one hating him, not me!"
Hermione felt as if some iron hand grabbed her insides. At this moment, she simply did not know what to answer to Ginny, but Ginny apparently was not expecting any answer – she just let out another short chuckle and patted her friend on her shoulder.
"Now I see why you've been sorted like this. All this time I wondered why you weren't in Ravenclaw, you know."
This time even Hermione laughed our loud.
The two remained completely unaware of the fact that their whole conversation had been overheard by the person who should have never heard even a word out of what they had been saying – had they known he had been around, they would have never said anything like that.
Snape marched towards the High Table with something like relief and happiness in his heart. He had heard Granger defending her from Weasley's words... it was more than saying "I love you". Words were just words, and she... whether she liked it or not, she was showing her true feelings through her behaviour.
On the other hand, he had also heard something else. Granger would like him to be a better man. She had never said that she would love to have a teacher who would be both good and kind, no. She had definitely said that she would love it if Snape would stop bullying the students... Then maybe that was the key?
They were going to have double Potions that day. Maybe he could show her that he could be the teacher she wanted... no. That he could be the man she was dreaming of. The man she needed.
"Oh no," said Ginny out of sudden. "Look who's just got in here."
Hermione turned her head just to see Snape sitting down. Their eyes met for a couple of seconds, and she would swear he smiled at her.
"Do you think he heard us?" asked Ginny worriedly. "We weren't talking particularly quietly, were we..."
Taking her eyes off Snape who now definitely bowed his head, as if to say good morning to her, Hermione looked at her friend and shook her head.
"No, I think he didn't," she replied. "We're just one of many students here, it would be impossible to hear us through all this chatter."
Because as they had talked, more and more people had been coming to the Great Hall for breakfast, and now, it was maybe not as cramped as it usually was, but rather full of people who were laughing and talking about their first week at Hogwarts. It would be normal to assume that Snape could not fish a word out of what they had been talking about – any other person would probably do that. However, there was something in Snape's behaviour that told Hermione that he had heard everything... or at least a great part of it.
"Good," said Ginny, her voice carrying a sound of relief. "I wouldn't like Snape to know what I think of him... even though sometimes I just dream of telling him all that in his face. But in my dreams, it is after I've graduated, not after the first week at school."
Hermione bit her bottom lip, then smiled.
"Don't you worry, Gin, I doubt he's heard a word," she said reassuringly, even though she knew she was lying – however, she did not want her friend to be even more worried. Ginny already had enough going on in her head. "You'll definitely have a chance to tell him what you think of him at the end of the year."
Ginny's smile was quite pale as she looked at Hermione, finishing her breakfast, but in the end, she let out a small chuckle.
"But first, we need to survive double Potions with him in the afternoon."