Hello my darlings!
Like always, I love and appreciate all the feedback and reviews. Really just the fact that ya'll are still hanging in there with me for this story is a gift. It truly is ;)
I'm pleased so many of you enjoyed Nesme coming more out of her shell.
I know some of you feel her speech was a little shoehorned in, but I honestly wasn't trying to make it that way. I've been setting up Nesme's backstory for a while, with little snippets here and there about her stepfather, his culture, and above all, Nesme's bloodline as a muggleborn. She's more quirky in a way we all can relate to or believe because she's from a muggle heritage.
Nesme honestly seemed like the best person to talk with Severus about the particular issue of legilimency because she can relate the most to Severus on hardships. Neither of them is necessarily ashamed of what they've lived through, but that doesn't mean their experiences and feelings revolving around it aren't private or important to them. Tampering in the mind is a controversial subject and Nesme, as someone not really inclined in either leanings about it, can best give Severus some perspective on what exactly he is risking and the importance of understanding that what he uses it for must be worth compromise his morals.
Simone preaches about right and wrong, but she's only experience a certain type of hardship; discrimination. She knows nothing of poverty or abuse, has had support and love from her parents and the security needed to truly come into her own. She can preach all she wants the moral dilemma of what Severus's is doing, but she can't give him the perspective needed for him to see just exactly what he is risking and what lines he would be crossing.
Nesme can get Severus to see his situation from both sides, because she can get him to realize how he'd feel on the opposite side of the wand, stressing to him the importance of not abusing this ability.
Okay, I really loved writing this chapter. Adds a bit of levity mixed in with "Uh-Oh, is the secret out?"
Trust me, that statement makes sense once you read the chapter.
If Someone Cared Enough
Chapter Sixty-Five: Spying is Easier When You're Good at it
"Remind me again why we're doing this?" Sirius asked with disinterest.
"Because," James said—with waning patience—for the fourth time, "Snivellous is up to something. I just know it."
The pair were staking out a mostly empty corridor just shortly after breakfast. Though safely concealed beneath James's trusty cloak, they still crouched low behind a suit of armor waiting with baited breath for their target.
"Of course he's up to something," Sirius drawled, "He's a slytherin; they're always up to something. It's what been a slimy snake is all about."
"But this time it's more than the usual sneakiness," James argued back, "Now he's skulking around in secret, ducking into weird places and dragging his loser friends and poor Evans along."
Sirius rolled his eyes, "You know she might be going willingly."
James shook his head, "Doubtful; they still don't seem to be talking much to one another. Whatever they fought about must have been big."
"I'll say," Sirius agreed, smirking, "I hear they didn't even really celebrate each other's birthdays this year. It was just them sitting on opposite ends of their friends in awkward silence while sharing a cake. They exchanged cards, but no presents."
James turned to Sirius, "How'd you hear that?"
"Meldonna," Sirius explained, "She has been gossiping about it. I guess she's excited Evans has had another falling out with Snivelly."
James clenched his fists, "If he called her a mudblood again, I'll—"
"Fly in on a gold plated broom, hex the nasty git, and sweep precious Lily off her feet," Sirius theorized, "Up away into the sunset where you'll live happily ever after, right?"
James narrowed his eyes at his friend, "You make it sound stupid."
Sirius raised his hands in mock surrender, "I have nothing to do with that; it's a dumb thought on its own."
James glared at Sirius when a bit of noise down recaptured his attention, "Look!"
James and Sirius watched as Nesme, that round faced Hufflepuff Snape hung around with, poked her head out into the corridor. Looking shiftily up and down the hall, she smiled in relief and waved to someone behind her.
In short order, Thea and Simone slipped out of the bathroom, closely followed by Lily and Mary. Stepping far more cautiously, Snape and Davis brought up the rear.
"That's the girl's loo," James whispered, "What's dirty ol' Snivellous doing in there?"
"It's the haunted loo," Sirius pointed out, "Maybe Snivelly's dating that pimply-faced ghost." He snickered to himself.
"Why are the other's with him?" James persisted, "What's Snape planning?"
As the pair looked on, the group of bathroom cavorters talked quietly amongst themselves for several minutes, heads together. After a few minutes, they all straightened and nodded to one another.
"They're planning something," Sirius said, finally drawn in by the secrecy.
As Nesme and Davis headed down the far end of the corridor, Mary hooked arms with Snape and Lily and led them down the opposite end, heading straight towards James and Sirius's hiding spot.
"Shit," James cursed, ducking down.
"We're in the cloak, you idiot," Sirius hissed, "Just keep quiet and we'll be fine."
The girls passed the spying Gryffindor's without conflict, having no clue they were there. However, Snape did pause for a minute on his way by them. Tilted his head to the side ever so slightly, a puzzled look came over his face. He sniffed the air.
Sirius muttered a little spell, sending a small breeze downwind of them.
Confused, whatever Snape thought he smelled was gone. Shaking his head, he went on his way.
"Do you have to wear so much cologne?" James asked Sirius in exasperation.
"At least I thought of a way to disperse it," Sirius defended, "How was I supposed to know he'd smell me."
James glared at Sirius from under the cloak, "Have you seen the size of his nose?"
The pair held each other's gazes for a moment, before twin grins spread over each of their faces. Holding back their laughter, they turned their attention back to the stragglers of Snape's group.
Thea and Simone stood whispering by the bathroom. Every so often Simone would gesture to Thea's book bag, a look of concern on her face. Thea seemed to mirror her concern, yet she shook her head, shrugged the bag over her shoulder and clutching it more firmly to herself.
"Wonder what's she's got in her bag that's so important?" Sirius mused.
"Whatever it is, I bet you it has to do with Snape," James said with great conviction.
As the Slytherin girls stood talking, a large furry mass waltzed out of the bathroom, sending James's heart plummeting into his stomach.
"Fuck," Sirius cursed behind him.
Amadeus strutted towards his owner as Simone crouched down to pick him up. Cooing to the hairy beast, Simone cradled it like a child, nuzzling her face into its belly. Setting the oversized creature back down, Simone gave it a gentle pat on the behind.
"Behave yourself, Amadeus," She called as she and Thea went off to their first class.
"Fuck, fuck, fuck," Sirius muttered, taking a careful step back as Amadeus paused and turned in their direction.
"That thing sees through cloaks," James recalled with panic.
Amadeus headed towards, his great, bushy tail swishing lazily in the air.
"We have to stay hidden until Serapeum and her sidekick are gone," Sirius hissed, "Back up!"
The pair inched backwards at a hurried pace, doing their damnedest to keep their footsteps quiet while out running the cat.
Amadeus would not be stopped, however, picking up the pace into a jolly, playful prance.
"Fuuuuuuck," Sirius ground out, nearly tripping over his own feet.
"Just a little longer," James said in a hushed voice, eyes on Simone's retreating form, "Almost…almost…"
Simone and Thea rounded the corner and out of sight.
"There!" James came to a halt, forcing Sirius to trip as the cloak abruptly yanked out of his grip and sent him crashing to the ground out of its coverage.
"Hey," he snapped, glaring at James and rubbing his side, "A little warning, next time."
"Relax, we're in the clear now," James said dismissively as he tucked away his cloak. He looked smugly down at the cat waddling towards them, "You almost exposed us, you little rotter. Better luck next time."
Amadeus sat down with a thump, eyes narrowed in displeasure.
"Now we just need to see what Wormy found out," James said to Sirius.
As if on que, a chubby rat scurried out of the recently vacated bathroom, its beady eyes swiveling back and forth to ensure the coast was clear.
"Well speak of the devil," Sirius said, dusting himself off.
The rat turned in their direction and made a beeline for them. It was halfway to James and Sirius when it's eyes landed on the cat nearby.
Unfortunately for the rat, Amadeus had seen it as well. Perking up, the enormous feline sprung to its feet and crouched into position.
"Uh-oh," Sirius uttered, "Oh…oh no, wait just a minute kitty."
It was too late. With a playful wiggle of his hindquarters, Amadeus leaped towards the plump little rodent.
The rat squeaked in fright, frantically running away with the cat in fast pursuit.
"Bad cat!" Sirius scolded, " Very bad cat!"
"Wormy, come this way," James called, "This way!"
Sidestepping the pursuing feline, the rat serpentine down the hall back towards James and Sirius. Shooting past them, it ducked behind a pillar as the cat followed. Moments later, a rather human yelp sounded out.
"…caught him," Sirius said with a cringe.
Peter came out from behind the pillar in a disheveled state. Hair askew and robes rumpled, he glowered at his snickering friends as he trudged towards them.
Dragging behind him on its belly was Amadeus, chewing and tugging on his robes with gleeful abandon, purring madly.
"So…uh," Sirius began, fighting away a grin, "I see you may a friend…"
"Sod off," Peter snapped, tugging his robe out of Amadeus's grasp, "See if I do anything for you two ever again."
"Don't be like that, Peter," James pleaded, still smiling.
"Yeah, we wouldn't have let him eat you," Sirius added. He plucked up Amadeus by the scruff of his neck, "You're a naughty kitty, aren't you? Yes, you great big pain in the ass."
Amadeus meowed plaintively, ears flattened to the sides of his head.
Sirius grinned wider, wagging a finger in the cat's face, "You can't outsmart us, you hairy fiend. We're smarter, cleverer." He let out a shout when Amadeus snagged his waving finger with is claws.
"Furry Bastard!" he cried, dropping the cat and sticking his finger in his mouth.
Amadeus held his head up triumphantly before darting off down the hall.
"Forget the cat," James said, turning to Peter, "What did you find out?"
Peter shrugged, "Nothing I could make sense of. They were talking about needing a password for something. Or a key; they didn't seem sure which."
"A key?" Sirius parroted, still nursing his hurt finger, "For what?"
"Dunno," Peter replied, "They needed to get into something, but I couldn't make out what; Myrtle was sobbing on and off the whole time, making a big racket."
"Must be why they pick there to meet," Sirius theorized, "Using Moaning Myrtle to drown out what they're saying."
"Maybe," Peter conceded, "They were messing with the sinks a lot too. Kept circling them; twisting handles and poking at the mirrors."
James and Sirius looked at each other in bafflement, "Well that's weird. You think they hid something in the sink?"
Peter shook his head, "I couldn't check because if I changed back in the bathroom Myrtle would have seen me."
"Good thinking," James complimented, "Can't have her running her mouth and outing us."
Sirius tapped his chin thoughtfully, "So they're looking to unlock something; that isn't much to go on. Any idea if it has anything to do with Thea's bag?"
"Bag?" Peter questioned.
"Yeah, that quiet girl," Sirius explained, "She was clutching her school bag awful tightly when she left. I think she's hiding something in there."
"Oh," Peter said nodding, "It was probably that book, then."
"What book?" James asked.
"They had this book with them," Peter elaborated, "Thea and Simone were the ones who brought it in. They were prodding it with their wands and trying various spells on it."
"Was it a spell book?" Sirius pushed.
Again, Peter shook his head, "Couldn't tell, it didn't have a title anywhere on the cover. But Snape was dead set against opening it. He got into an argument with Simone about it even. She seemed convinced it had something to do with the key they were looking for."
"Must have been a notebook then," Sirius said, "Snape's gotta be keeping his plans in there; probably something about this 'key' or something."
"Then why wouldn't he want Simone to open it?" James questioned.
Sirius waved his arms in exasperation, "He's a Slytherin! They don't trust anyone, not even each other. Whatever he's cooking up, I doubt he wants Serapeum to be totally in the know; she'd steal his ideas."
"She and Thea were the ones who had the book, though," James pointed out, "And they apparently left with it."
Sirius shrugged, "Then I haven't a clue what the hell it is. Either way, if Snape is involved, it's probably really bad."
"All the better reason to tail him until we have our answers," James said decidedly, "But first, let's see what's all the fuss with this bathroom."
"Are you sure, Prongs," Peter asked nervously, pretty sure Myrtle will blab if we all just flounce in there."
"First off: Sirius flounces, I strut," James clarified, earning the finger from Sirius, "And secondly, we won't be seen by her at all," he waved his bundled up cloak, "Shall we, gents?"
It was a tighter fit under the cloak with three people as opposed to two, but nothing they hadn't managed before. With careful, slow movements, they crept into the bathroom. Watching where they stepped—lest they walk into a puddle and alert Myrtle to their presence—they converged on the sinks in stealthy silence.
Above them, Myrtle hung listlessly in the air, sighing and simpering to herself in forlorn self-deprecation.
"Which sink were they at, Wormtail," James whispered as softly as possible.
"The one on the far right," Peter whispered back, "The one with the dirty mirror."
"Looks pretty ordinary to me," Sirius said quietly. He turned the faucet, "Doesn't even work."
"Maybe Snape messed with it," James suggested, "Jammed something inside it, I bet."
Sirius stuck his finger in the spout, feeling around.
"Nothing here," he concluded, "Did they do anything else?"
"Well, they were trying to pulled the faucets and mirrors off," Peter confessed, "They seemed convinced something was behind them."
"That's weird," James observed.
"This is a waste of time," Sirius huffed, "Let's just follow Snape and see what he's up to."
As he said this, Sirius took a step backwards, only to land his foot plop in a puddle.
Immediately the crying stopped.
"Who's there," Myrtle demanded, glancing around furtively, "Come to make fun of me?"
James held a finger to his lips as he and his friends stayed deadly still.
"Show yourselves!" Myrtle cried angrily, "Is this some sort of joke? Playing games on poor Myrtle?"
Growing frustrated with the lack of response, Myrtle scowled.
"I don't have to stand for this," she declared, "Out with you!"
Waving her hands, Myrtle brought a deluge of water spewing out of the toilets in a great, big wave and sent it hurling in the direction she heard the splash.
"Incoming!" Sirius shouted.
Scrambling out of the wave, he and his friends made a mad dash out of the bathroom as water rained down on them, dredge up from Merlin knows where. Stumbling over the soaked cloak, the trio collapsed just outside the bathroom, falling over each other to land in a heap on the floor.
"Do you think she saw us?" Peter asked worriedly.
James shook his head, spitting out some water with a grimace, "I don't think so, we had our backs to her."
"Now can we go follow Snivellous?" Sirius asked in annoyance. He stood up, shaking out his wet pants legs.
James sighed, wringing out his sodden cloak, "Sure."
A gaggle of girls passed them, eyeing the odd site.
"Ladies," Sirius said with a bow, prompting the girls to giggle as they walked away.
James elbowed Sirius, "You can flirt later. Take out the map; let's find what Snape's been up to."
{page break}
"Can you see anything?" James asked, trying to see through the narrow space in between two heavy books.
Sirius shook his head, "Nah, the angle's not right. We need to get closer."
Now water-free curtesy of a few drying spells, the trio of nosey Gryffindors slide in and out of the rows of bookshelves in the library. Trying to find the perfect place to spy from, their eyes peeked out between crevices in the stacks of books, fixated on the goings on of one lone table tucked away in the corner.
"He's not doing much," Sirius observed from a better hiding spot, "He's just reading."
James leaned forward, "Reading what?"
"I can't see the title when the book's lying flat on the table now can I, Prongs?" Sirius quipped sarcastically.
James glared at him, "Don't get your skivvies in a twist; I was just asking."
"Well the answer was obvious," Sirius shot back, "We're bloody standing next to each other. If you can't see the book, what makes you think I can?"
Peter wrung his hands together fretfully, "You guys, be quiet or he'll hear us."
"This was a waste of time," Sirius complained, "We've been here nearly an hour and he's done hardly anything. We missed Transfiguration; that's a detention for sure."
"It'll be worth it when we catch Snivellous in the act," James argued.
"Though in the act of what, is anyone's guess," Sirius groused stepping back from the shelves, "I'm out of here."
"Wait," James said suddenly, grabbing hold of Sirius's sleeve, "Someone's coming over."
He pointed frantically at an approaching figure.
Sirius sighed, "It's just Serapeum. And her crony," he added as Thea came into view, "They must be out of class by now. You know…because they actually went to class."
"Shh!" James waved Sirius off, staring eagerly at the Slytherins.
"They've got the book again," James whispered excitedly as Thea produced a leather book from her belongings, "Maybe they're going to read it."
"Reading, how exciting," Sirius drawled.
At the table, there seemed to be a hushed argument taking place between Snape and Simone. The taller girl brandished the book about angrily, gesturing to it insistently while poking Snape in the chest from time to time. Snape for his part, was unmoved by whatever the girl was saying, his face resolute and impassive as he shook his head and crossed his arms in front of him in an X over and over.
"Whatever Serapeum wants with that book, Snape's not having it," Peter observed, "Do you think it's cursed?"
James snorted, "As if Snivelly's afraid to play with cursed items. He probably cursed it himself."
Fed up of whatever conversation took place, Simone shoved the book into Snape's, forcing him to take it with great reluctance.
Begrudgingly, Snape muttered something James and his friends couldn't make out, then sat down and hesitantly opened the book, Simone and Thea crowding around him.
"We can't make out the words of anything from here so a fat load of good it does us to have them open the ruddy thing."
James frowned, thoroughly put out, "True. It is all just scribbles from where we're standing. I can't—wait a minute."
"What?" Sirius inquired.
James stood on tiptoe, craning his neck to see better, "There isn't anything written in that book."
Sirius whipped back around to the table, "What?"
"The book's blank," James pointed out, "Look. Every page they flip; there's nothing on it."
"So it's a notebook after all?" Sirius asked, baffled, "I would have thought Snape would have it loaded with writings; especially since he's being so secretive about it."
Snape had his head bowed over the book, saying something out the side of his mouth that drew a flippant gesture from Simone, the girl jabbing at the pages with her wand insistently.
"Are they trying to enchant it?" James asked.
"Maybe the words are hidden with vanishing ink," Peter suggested.
Batting Simone's wand away, Snape brought out an inkwell and quill. Scribbling something in the book, he and his two female companions watched as the ink faded from sight.
"Would you look at that," Sirius said, impressed, "That's one way to keep your journal private."
"Hey, something else is appearing," Peter pointed out.
Sure enough, a slightly longer sentence than the one Snape put down seeped forth onto the page, though it was still too far away for James or his friends to make out.
"So…give a secret, get a secret?" Sirius ruminated.
"Not sure a book can do that," James said, unsure, "Do any enchantments or charms work that way?"
"Well, what else could it be?" Sirius asked, as Snape wrote a few more lines in the book, "It's not like the bloody book can talk to him."
"Shh, we don't want to be overheard," James warned, though it may have come too late.
Snape turned towards their hiding place, narrowing his eyes and squinting at the shelves.
James and the others kept as still as possible, hoping the Slytherin wouldn't be able to make out their eyes hidden among the shadows.
Shrugging his shoulders, Snape seemed to dismiss whatever he thought he heard, though clearly he wasn't going to take any chances. Closing the book, he tucked it under his arm and nodded for Simone and Thea to follow him, departing the library together.
"Come on, before we lose them," Sirius urged moving forward. A hand across his chest stopped him.
"Don't be hasty," James advised, "We don't want to be seen. Let's give them a head start and then use the map to track them."
The trio pursued their targets throughout the castle; to conceal the truth of their map from others, they acted as though it was a star chart for Astronomy they were looking over whenever anyone passed them in the halls.
"They're heading for the seventh floor," Sirius said, pointing at a group of footsteps wandering across the map.
"What do you suppose they're up to?" James asked.
"Beats me," Sirius said, "But whatever it is, I can't wait to catch them in the act,"
Picking up the pace, Sirius drew his wand, eager anticipation on his roguish face.
James smiled, holding his own wand at the ready, "If we catch them doing something particularly foul, maybe they'll get expelled."
Sirius gave his friend a wolfish grin, "That's what I'm hoping!"
"You can't run around with your wands out," Peter cried, struggling to keep up with the pair, "Or people will think you are up to no good."
His warnings fell on deaf ears.
"Almost there," James said, sparing the map a quick glance, "Right around….here—gotcha!"
Leaping around the corner, James and Sirius held their wands confidently out in front of them, grinning proudly.
Whatever victory they were hoping to achieve, however, never came as they realized they were staring at a blank wall.
"Wha," James gaped, flummoxed, "Where'd they go?"
Sirius pocketed his wand with a scowl, clearly put out.
"Did you read the map right," he asked with a frustrated growl. He grabbed the parchment from James and scanned it with fervor, "Maybe they ducked into a classroom somewhere nearby."
James shook his head. Taking a corner of the map, he indicated where they were standing, "I'm telling you, they were right in this very spot a few seconds ago. That's not enough time to get to a classroom; there's hardly any rooms on this floor as it is."
"Well there's no door here," Sirius stated, gesturing to the corridor, "So it's not like they disillusioned it; the map would still show it."
"Then where are they?" James asked.
"How should I know?" Sirius shot back.
Peter piped up hesitantly, "Um…guys. Didn't this happen once before?"
James and Sirius looked at him questioningly.
"What's happened before?" Sirius asked.
Peter tapped his fingers together nervously, looking about, "People disappearing from the map. It happened that time in the common room when we were spying on Snape. A few days after Halloween; one minute he and his friends were there; the next they weren't."
"Hey you're right," Sirius said, eyes going wide, "Then it wasn't a fluke."
"Not only that," James said, examining the map closely, "It was in this very spot too."
Sirius approached the wall, running his hands along it.
"What are you hiding it?" he asked to no one.
James came up besides him, "What no, Padfoot?"
Sirius turned to James, a glint in his eye, "I say we wait right here till they reappear. If there's some secret entrance we don't know about, they'll have to come out of it eventually."
James nodded, a devious grin spreading across his face, "And when they do, we'll hex them good—"
"You!" croaked a raspy voice.
Filch hobbled up to them, his trusty cat at his side.
"You three!" he cried, brandishing an accusing finger at them, "What are you doing up here? Back to mess up this corridor again with your slop? I spent three days cleaning up that mess!"
"Uh…" James stammered, sheepishly pocketing his wand; that didn't help the suspicious against them, "Beg pardon?"
"You heard me," Filch bit out, "I was scraping gunk off the walls till my fingers cramped. I won't have you doing it again."
"That wasn't us," Peter insisted, recalling talk of such a prank, "It was the Prewe—"
Sirius slapped a hand over Peter's mouth.
"Prankster don't snitch on each other," he scolded in a harsh whisper.
"Get going with you," Filch growled, advancing on them menacingly, "Get going. Get! I won't have any more mischief from you three."
Flapping his arms about him, Filch chased the boys from the corridor, snarling after them.
"I guess having our reputation proceed us has its downsides," Sirius grumbled.
"Now how are we going to catch them?" James complained.
Sirius patted James on the shoulder, "Cheer up, Prongs. If there is a passageway there, they'll surely go back to plenty of times to come. We'll catch them another day."
James nodded glumly, "I suppose so. We'll have to keep an eye on them for now on."
"More importantly," Sirius declared, "We have to get a hold of that book."
We've all been wondering what our resident knuckleheads have been doing, right? Well here you go; they've been doing a whole lot of nothing and accomplishing very little.
Had a great time fleshing out the guys some more. While I despise Sirius's actions, I can't deny that he has some level of charm in the presence of people he likes. He also is very loyal and dedicated to those he cares about. So it's interesting to try my hand at writing those aspects instead of focusing solely on his jerk persona.
Peter has been great fun to work with. I've always felt that his cowardice and ultimately his betrayal were the result of years of everyone teaching him to lack confidence in himself. The teachers thought little of his abilities, most adults had low expectations of him, even his own friends basically dismissed his capabilities on a regular basis, joking constantly about his lack of skill or talent. He was more skilled than people give him credit for if you look at his accomplishment in framing Sirius and creating a spell strong enough to kill so many so he could escape. He even managed to become an animagus-no easy feat, mind you-and his friends wouldn't even let him have that victory, pointing out in canon that he supposedly needed their help greatly to do it.
He was built up to be this utter failure, the definition of incompetence that even he doubted he could do anything right. So of course he would be fully convinced he stood zero chance against Voldemort. It sounds like he joined Voldemort before Voldemort had actually heard the prophecy or chosen which family to target, so it wasn't like from the get go he decided to sell out his friends. It seems rather he joined when confronted in order to avoid being tortured or killed and then when the Potters were targeted, he was already enslaved to Voldemort and knew he'd be murdered if he didn't cooperate. It was still wrong to reveal their location, but for all we know, Peter might have believed that James or Lily was smart, strong, or skilled enough to make it out alive.
Please review, my dears.