Author: This is a parody of a parody of a parody! Parody-ception!
*BWOOOOOM*
DRA-GON-SOULS!
Dumplin: I'm here, I'm powerful, and I'm terrifying!
Trunks: What's your story?
(Trunks gets smacked)
Dumplin: Watch the goddamn Let's Play, maggot!
Chronoa: Saying "Supreme Kai of Time" every time I'm in a scene is exhausting. Just call me Chronoa for simplicity's sake. Now go fight evil-doers.
Dumplin: Ballin'.
Towa: I'm an evil demon scientist. I'm also incredibly sexy.
Dumplin: Humina humina humina!
Towa: Ha! You're funny.
*KA-BOOM*
Towa: You destroyed all my plans, you bastard!
Dumplin: Sorry about that. Wanna get married?
Towa: Eh, why not?
*Here Comes the Bride*
Towa: Hey, Dumplin, want to watch me make something cool?
Dumplin: You bet!
*Lightning crash*
Baby Blob Puddin: Nyah~!
Dumplin: She's adorable!
Towa: That is absolutely NOT what I meant to make.
Trunks: What is that thing?
Dumplin: She's our daughter, maggot! We are a big happy family!
Towa: Yeah, no.
Baby Blob Puddin: Nyah~! I'm gonna perform a magic trick!
*Super Mario Power-up Sound*
Kid Puddin: (singing) I'm A Big Kid Now!
Paata: Hi Puddin. I'm Paata, a cadet Time Patroller.
Kid Puddin: Awesome! Can we be friends?
Paata: Even better. We can be pseudo-siblings and do a bunch of happy sibling things together while the editor of this story ships us relentlessly.
Kid Puddin: Yay!
Editor: Boo!
Kid Puddin and Paata: Let's train!
Punohsa: Sorry, kid. You can't train.
Kid Puddin: F##k!
Punohsa: You need to get in control of that strength of yours.
Dumplin: Done!
(Time Door slams closed, but then opens to show grown-up Puddin)
Puddin: Ready to train now!
Punohsa and Paata: Awesome!
Editor: sHiP?
Author: No.
Puddin: Sports break!
*Take Me Out to the Ballgame*
(Puddin hits a home run)
Puddin: Oh no! I hit the dragon!
Punohsa: Oh no! She hit the dragon!
Dragon: WHY AM I EVEN HERE?!
Dailli: You beat me in baseball! That makes you my greatest enemy!
Puddin: Who are you again?
*Jingle Bell Rock*
Puddin: And a Merry Christmas to everyone!
Towa: I'm too evil for families and Christmas. I'm leaving.
Puddin and Dumplin: Wait… WHAT?!
Towa: I'm alright gone.
*Door slams*
Puddin: Mom!
Dumplin: Bitch.
*Sad music plays*
(In the Time Nest)
Author: Okay Punohsa, Dumplin's drunk and Puddin's depressed, so here's a POV chapter for you.
Punohsa: Am I major character now?
Author: Yes.
Editor: Ship?
Author: No.
Punohsa: Go home you're drunk.
Dumplin: I'm not THAT drunk. *Hiccup*
*Silence*
Dumplin: Fine.
*Sad music still playing*
Dumplin: I got over myself, so don't worry, Puddin. We'll be okay. The two of us will get through this together.
Puddin: I know, Daddy.
(Pause for a moment to absorb the feels)
Punohsa and Paata: We're here too.
(silence)
*School Bell Rings*
Author: Daili, here's POV chapter. I made you to suck at life for my amusement. Dance for me, fool!
Daili: Ha ha! I must be a major character! See that Puddin? I am your rival. Now we can finally be together… in battle!
Puddin: Seriously, who the fizzity-uck are you?!
Daili: But I am the great, amazing, super special awesome, wonderful, handsome, formidable, powerful, unforgettable…
Author, Editor, Audience, and Dragon: NOBODY CARES!
Author: And now, Puddin is ready to take the next step in her journey to become the ultimate Time Patroller and save the world…
By burning it to the f##king ground!
DRA-GON-SOULSSSSSSSSS!
AN: I'm focusing my energy on the last few edits to the next chapter of Puddin. I promise I'll have a bigger author's note when that chapter gets published real soon. Hoped you liked this chapter :)