Chapter Ten - Seeing Eye to Eye
I have no words to open this chapter with. Just, uh, see for yourself. It's a doozy.
"This is the way the world ends. This is the way the world ends. This is the way the world ends. Not with a bang, but a whimper."
~ T.S. Eliot
Marinette's Point of View
It's my turn now.
An hour ago, Nino called me. His voice was hoarse. He sounded exhausted. You could practically hear the tears running down his cheeks as he spoke to me. He wouldn't tell me what his trial had been. I wasn't surprised. Ivan also has yet to say what exactly his challenge was. He hasn't spoken a single word since at any of our meetings, just shaking or nodding his head when any of us ask him questions. It hurts to see him regressing back to how he was before Mylene helped him come out of his shell, but I can't say I blame him. This has been hard on all of us.
Adrien- My breath catches in my throat.
"Marinette?" Tikki hesitantly lands on my shoulder, speaking into my ear. "Are...are you okay?"
Ever since I was on the phone with Nino, I've been curled up in the bathroom of my apartment. I've seen so many people in their challenges. Heard about others. Suddenly, it's all catching up to me. Nino and I were the only ones left. Now that he's had is...
"I'm terrified," I whimper, barely managing to look up and meet Tikki's gaze amidst my tears.
If I fail, someone will pay the ultimate price for it. How is that even fair? How is it fair for someone else to pay for my mistake? For someone to pay for anyone else's mistake? It's not. It's not fair. What if I mess up? I can't, but there's no way I can guarantee I succeed.
There's nothing I can do. No way I can escape. No way I can prevent it. No way I can delay it. All I can do is wait, so that's what I do.
I sit and wait.
I've spent a day here now. Sitting and waiting and dwelling. Wondering when the Gamemaker will come knocking.
Tikki is worried about me. She keeps trying to get me to stand up. To get me to eat. To drink. To sleep. She says I need to keep my energy up for this. She's not wrong. At this point I've long since run out of tears to cry. But I can't bring myself to move. I know doing this to myself is just shooting myself in the foot. After all, if I'm depleted of all energy, I'm going to mess this up. I don't want to fail this for Manon. I want her to live. I don't want to fail.
But I also can't convince myself to stand up and take care of myself, so that I can do it right.
After a second day, Tikki finally manages to make me get off the floor to take care of myself. It takes more effort than I care to admit to even stand up, let alone stumble to my bedroom. I flop down onto the bed, curling up on my blankets. I'll eat and drink once I've slept. Change clothes too. But for now, I just need to sleep. I need to be prepared.
"Sleep well, Marinette," Tikki whispers, kissing my forehead.
She must use some sort of kwami magic, because the moment she does, I fall fast asleep.
When I finally wake up, I do feel refreshed. Thank goodness Tikki doesn't give up in trying to take care of me.
Then I take a shower.
Change clothes.
Eat some food.
As I finish my breakfast and begin to take my dishes to the sink, there's a knock at the door. My plate slips from my hand, shattering on the floor, as I slowly turn. Tikki says something; I don't process it. Instead, I slowly make my way over to the door. I hesitate, my hand shaking as I try to wrap it around the door knob. After a few minutes, I manage to gather enough strength to turn the doorknob and open the door.
Sitting outside is a cassette player and-
"A spoon?" I'm so confused that at this point I'm not even processing my fear. Crouching down, I pick both up before turning around and bringing them back to my kitchen table, almost forgetting to even shut the door behind me. "Tikki-" I look up to see her finishing up some cleaning of the dish I dropped before. "Oh, I'm sorry about that. Thank you."
She nods, flying over with big, wide eyes. "Is that it then?"
I frown, staring at the two items as I set them down on the table. "I think so. I mean who else would-"
"-leave a cassette player." She finishes, landing on the table so she can properly examine them.
We both stare at it for a moment. This is crazy. This is really happening. The last challenge. Taking a deep breath, I reach forward and press 'play' to hear just what the Gamemaker has to say.
My voice is echoed back at me. "Marinette Dupain-Cheng. Ladybug. The heroine of Paris."
Then the recording stops. I stare at it before looking to Tikki, terrified. Did it break? Did something happen to it? Is it defective? Crap! I can't complete the challenge if I can't hear the rest of this cassette. What am I supposed to do?
"Are you ready for your challenge?" Eyes wide, I turn around, coming face to face with myself.
She's leaning in the doorway to my bedroom, grinning. Every aspect matches me: the outfit, the hair, the eyes. Everything. She walks closer, leaning against the other end of the table when she finally decides to stop.
"You're-you're-"
"Oh, my bad." She laughs. She laughs with my laugh. It's actually horrific. "Does this make you uncomfortable? Here, let me change." She winks, and slowly her form melts to someone different. Then, the spitting image of Adrien stares back at me, but my voice still comes out of his mouth. "Is this better?"
"How?" I manage to force the question out of my mouth, spitting it like it's poison.
"Wouldn't you love to know?" Now it's Adrien's voice that greets me. Slowly, he walks around the table, stalking me like a predator stalks his prey. I try to move away, only to end up bumping my hip against the counter. I'm cornered. "What's got you so nervous, Mari?" He puts his hands on the counter on either side of me, effectively trapping me beneath him. The smirk on his face is so out of character for Adrien. Everything about Adrien is off here, even if the looks and voice match him. "Do you feel your heart quickening? Don't think I missed that glance to my lips. Looking for a kiss?"
It's this that ultimately brings me from my trance, shoving him backwards and scrambling away. That's not Adrien, no matter how much it looks like him. "You aren't Adrien." I can't work up the nerve to vocalize the second part of that sentiment, but I think we both understand it. Adrien is dead because of you.
He rolls his eyes. "I give you the chance of a lifetime to enjoy this opportunity, and you don't even take it?" He snorts. "How pure. No wonder the public loves you. The innocent heroine. You don't even want to pretend for a few moments. Really?"
"What do you want, Gamemaker? What's my challenge?" I snap, struggling to keep eye contact with him.
"Hurry up before I kill you." Tikki hisses, alighting on my shoulder.
"Fine, fine." The Gamemaker waves his hand to shut us up. "Marinette, you're beloved by many people in Paris. Whether as yourself or Ladybug, you have so much attention on you. But we both know there's one person in particular who arguably loves you more than anyone else: Chat Noir." He pauses, and so I nod, biting my lip. "Everyone seems to think you're pretty, but Chat," I cringe hearing him use my nickname for my partner. It sounds so wrong coming from his mouth, "thinks even more highly of you. He thinks you're beautiful. And what he so often speaks to is how beautiful your bright, blue eyes are."
I take a deep breath, knowing I need to maintain my cool. "What does that have to do with my challenge?"
"Simple. Did you know that, so long as someone receives quick medical attention, they are capable of losing an eye and not dying of blood loss? They just have to be careful to avoid digging too deep and hitting the brain."
"You want to remove my eye?" He shakes his head at my question, chuckling like it's a ridiculous concept.
I breathe my sigh of relief too early. "I want you to remove your eye. With the spoon I provided you with."
My heart begins to grow more frantic in its beating in my chest. "What?"
He rolls his eyes. "Don't lose your head yet, dear. I'm not quite finished."
"What more can you even ask for?"
"You have till noon, not only to scoop your eye right out of your eye socket," The monster pauses, obviously savoring the tension coating the room, "but also to eat it."
I nearly throw up at the words. "Y-you want me to what?"
"Come on, Marinette! You're Ladybug. You're a smart girl. Surely you understand what I'm saying. I just spelled it out for you!"
"But...but..."
"But what? I'm not even finished yet, Marinette. You see, here's the thing." Once again, the Gamemaker changes forms, this time donning the appearance of my partner, Chat Noir. "I also have your precious partner." I freeze, remembering the scene Tikki inadvertently showed me with Plagg. Plagg is Chat Noir's kwami. Which means the Gamemaker is telling the truth. "And if you don't play along, something terrible might happen to both him and his kwami."
"I-I'll do it." It's barely even a whimper.
"What was that?"
"I'll do it."
He leans forward. "Sorry, one more time? I couldn't hear you."
I lunge forward to slap him, but he catches my wrist. "I said I'd do it."
"Lovely!" Before I can stop him, he leans forward and plants a kiss on my cheek.
I try to retaliate, but he pulls away too fast, and before I know it he's gone.
"T-Tikki?"
"Oh, Mari," My kwami sobs on my shoulder.
"Be ready to call an ambulance."
I've never heard Tikki be so frightened before. "No, you can't-"
I close my eyes, taking a deep breathe. "I don't have a choice. I have to."
It takes me an hour to psyche myself up for the challenge.
An hour is all I give myself. In all honesty, no amount of time in the world would allow me to get psyched up for this. But I can at least offer myself an hour to try.
Now I stand in my kitchen, Tikki sitting by the phone. The moment the eye is out, she's going to call. While that's happening, I'm going to eat the eye.
My eye.
I try not to think about that.
The hand clutching the spoon shakes. Why did it have to be this? I need my hand to be steady to get this out. Tikki volunteers her help once again, but once again I shoot her down. I can't do anything the Gamemaker might consider cheating. I know what happened with Kim, after all. I refuse to let that happen with me.
"Here we go," I whisper to myself, lifting the hand up.
Once again, I hesitate. This is it. Once I start, there's no going back. I have to be careful while doing this, but I also can't take too long, or else I might not get everything done in time.
I need to just commit.
Slowly, I lower the spoon towards my eye, and it instinctively closes. I curse under my breathe, pulling the spoon away and reopening my eye. This time, I use my other hand to pry my eye open before approaching it with the spoon. .My eye begins to water and my vision goes blurry. My eyelid twitches, trying desperately to close and offer some meager protection. I just force my fingers to push harder. It can't be allowed to shut.
I stand like that for a moment, but the pain is almost unbearable. I haven't even stuck the spoon in yet. Am I really doing this?
There's no time to think. I just have to do it.
I plunge the spoon into my eye and scream. It's not too far in, but the pain is enough to make my hand holding my eye closed pull back. I almost lose my grip on the spoon too. That entire side of my vision has been plunged into darkness and searing pain. Tears trail down my cheeks, creating a salty, irony mixture that drips into my mouth. I sputter, but manage to regain a firm grasp on the spoon and begin to try and pull.
It burns. Once again, I nearly release the spoon, and this time I place both of my shaking hands on the handle before trying for the third time.
"Tikki!" I cry, trying to work up the nerve to pull it out. It hurts so bad, but won't it hurt once to try and tug it out? Especially since I need the eyeball too?
"You can do this, Marinette," That's all she can really do: offer me encouragement. Anything else could anger the Gamemaker. I have to do this on my own.
With a scream, I rip the spoon out, but my good eye sees that it comes up without the eye. I curse, brushing a concoction of snot, tears, and blood from my face so that it doesn't fill my mouth and lungs. I have to do it again. I have to get that eye out.
I plunge the spoon in again, trying to push it about - and shrieking in pain in the process - till I get under what I assume is my eye. After a few minutes, I manage it, pulling the spoon back out. My head feels like it's about to explode. Oh gosh, it hurts!
"Did...did I get it all, Tikki?"
She sounds like she's about to throw up. "There's...still a bit left." I don't risk looking at her, knowing she's by the window and not wanting to chance seeing my reflection. I must look disgusting right now.
Not knowing what else to do, I drop what I have fished out into my free hand before trying again. It's squishy and mushy and disgusting. I almost drop it, but manage to keep it within my grasp. I try not to squeeze it. It's so gross. It hurts so much. I can barely formulate coherent thoughts through the pain.
Hand up. Spoon in. Deep breathes. Ignore pain. Ignore crying. Bit deeper. Scoop.
It takes a few tries before, finally, I catch the remainder of eyeball. I nearly wretch as I catch sight of both parts.
Scrunching my remaining eye shut - though I guess my other eyelid shuts too - I gasp out, "Call the ambulance, Tikki!"
"R-right!" I hear the phone dialing as I force my eyes back open, readjusting the two parts of the eye so they're back on the spoon.
Oh gosh, that's my eye.
The realization still hasn't fully sunk in.
"Hang on, Marinette!" Tikki's voice sounds so far away.
Lifting the spoon up, I force my mouth open and shove it inside. Immediately I feel like throwing up, but I manage to resist, pulling the spoon back out of my mouth but leaving the eyeball inside. Wishing I could choke, I force myself to chew it, mashing it up before trying to swallow. I want to grab water, to force it down, but I'm too scared to. What if the Gamemaker sees that as cheating? No. No, I can't risk it. I have to swallow it before I can drink or eat anything else.
"They're on their way! They're on their way, Marinette. Just a little bit longer! You're so close!"
Finally, I force it down my throat, keeping one hand over my mouth to make sure I don't spit it back up. It hurts so bad. It hurts so bad!
Oh gosh, my eyes and head hurt from just WRITING that. To be fair, I don't know if this is completely realistic. It IS possible - I did some research - but I don't know if this would be how it's possible. Still, I tried. Oh gosh, that was a horrible one to write. I really don't know if this chapter or last chapter was worse. You guys will have to tell me.
In the mean time, thank you guys for reading. Leave a review if you are looking forward to knowing the fates of everyone on the other side of things. After all, we have yet to see what happened to those tied to someone who lost their challenge. Do you think they'll be okay?
That's all I can really write here for now. Gah, that was a really rough chapter writing wise. I don't even want to imagine it. I almost cried at one point purely from imagining how painful that must be. It was a really draining one. So that's where I'm going to leave this story for now.
Until next time,
Dagger