Isabella
"I hope you like it." Edward blushed. We were sitting in the living room, everyone having left hours ago. He clasped a silver bracelet around my wrist. There was a white stone in the middle that shimmered in the light.
"I love it, Edward." I gasped.
I wasn't a big fan of receiving gifts. The attention always made me uncomfortable, I didn't deserve to have money spent on me.
But this gift- Edward's gift- made my heart flutter against my chest. My cheeks turned pink and a small smile danced upon my lips. His hand rested on mine for a moment before moving away. I felt the sudden cold. I wanted the warmth back. I wanted him back.
"It was my mother's." He said. "Her mother gave it to her when she got married and now I'm giving it to you."
His gazes into my eyes. For a moment I forget to breathe.
"Th-this isn't a marriage proposal right?" I force myself to laugh. My face burns red and I let out a deep breathe. What was happening to me?
"No. Just something to always remember me by." His lips curve up.
"Esme won't mind?"
"She loves you Bella. She wouldn't give this to anyone else."
I quirk my eyebrow up.
"Not even Alice," he says. "It's not even her style. It looks perfect on you."
Alice liked blingier jewelry that made a statement. This bracelet was vintage and older and looked as if it had lived through many years.
"You don't know how much this means, Edward. It's perfect." I curl up in the corner of the couch and wrap a blanket around myself. We could hear everyone in the dining room. They were laughing loudly at something Alice said.
I rejoiced in the silence. Edward and I didn't need conversation to be comfortable. We were content just being… together. That spoke louder than words. I needed him and he needed me. We needed each other.
Two days later, I was still smiling. I couldn't stop smiling. Everything was going right for once. I was feeling happier than ever before. I never felt like this with Demetri. My heart was only half full. I only had a slight daze in my eyes. But with Edward it felt like my heart was about to burst and there were stars all around. I was Euphoric!
"Where'd you get that bracelet?" Bianca grabbed my wrist all of a sudden. I yank my hand back only for her to hold on tighter. Her thumb grazes over the stone. "It's beautiful. It's so… so vintage!"
Bianca Boticelli was loud, blonde, and beautiful. She had a bubbly personality like Alice but was also quiet and reserved just like me. She was my friend and the first person brave enough to actually come up to talk to me. We worked at Lottie's Bookstore in downtown Henderson. She went to Henderson high school and new nothing of my past or Forks or anything that happened. I was determined to keep it that way.
As far as everyone here knew, I was just Isabella- the painfully shy, socially awkward girl. Yes I had panic attacks and would get that distant look in my eye at time but everyone learned that it was best not to ask about it. Something were better left unsaid.
I yank my arm back and she eventually lets go. I sigh and tell her that "I got it for Christmas from a… friend."
"A friend?" She smirks. "They way you just said it, shows that this friend is no friend."
"i-I don't know what you're talking about." I stammer and go back to placing the cart of the books on the shelf. It was a quiet Sunday afternoon, nobody was in the store but us.
"You're blushing Isabella. You're seeing somebody, aren't you?" she places her hand on her hip and cocks her head to the side.
I gulp and turn away from her. She never let up. I push the cart over to the next shelf of books and start to stack them. I counted in my head. I had stacked fifteen books but I had twenty more to do. I needed to count them just to make sure I had fifteen because if I didn't make sure then my heart would start to race and panic would take over and I'd have a complete mental break down and Bianca would think I was a freak.
She talks to much. I love her but she stresses me out.
"Don't you have something to do?" I grit my teeth together. I realize how rude that just sounded and immediately regret it. A look of hurt flashes across her face.
"I didn't mean that." I sigh. "I-"
Ding!
The sound of the bell grabs our attention and we immediately turn our attention to the front of the store. I almost drop the books in my hands. My heart plummets to my stomach and I stumble back.
"Isabella?" Bianca cocks her head to the side. "What's wrong?"
"I'm- I'm just not feeling well." my face turns a pale white and I bite my bottom lip until I taste blood. Of all bookstores in the state, Edward had to choose this one to come to? The whole point of working in Henderson was to start over. Have no distractions from the past. Edward was part of the past.
Bianca confidently walks up to him and her lips curve up into a smile. This is her flirty face- she uses it on all the guys. I hide behind the bookshelf- my hands clench and unclench into fists.
Don't see me. Don't see me.
Edward doesn't see me.
"How can I help you?" Bianca twirls a golden lock around her finger and steps closer. A quick burst of anger flares in my stomache, watching the two of them. She was pretty and tall and popular. She was the kind of girl Edward would date.
Not that he would.
He's with me. We're together. I love him.
But why is he smiling at Bianca like that? What does that mean?
It means nothing. He's being friendly, Bella.
Actually… wait a minute… it's more of a grimace. His shoulders hunch and he turns to her with a look of reluctance. I peek through the crack of two books. The only sound is the beating of my heart. I was gonna kill him and I was gonna make sure it hurt. He knew not to come here. I specifically told him not to.
The Euphoria has faded. Now I'm just bitter and angry.
You didn't say why.
Does that matter? He should've listened. Nobody ever listened to me. There's a reason I have trust issues.
"...Isabella?"
Fuck.
Her voice rang throughout the air. She's looking right at me. She knows that I'm behind the bookshelf. I felt the color drain from my already pale face. Everything was shaking. I was shaking. My heart pounded against my chest and and I felt this burning fire in my stomach even stronger than before. I was angry- no scratch that- I was furious.
I come from behind the bookshelf and I swear I see him flinch. If looks could kill… He knew I was about ready to murder someone (a.k.a him). He held a book in his hand that I knew for certain he wasn't going to read.
"I-I've got to go." I stumbled back, tripping on my feet. Edward purses his lips like he wants to say something but decides against it at last minute. I don't want to here what he has to say.
"Isabella, your shift isn't done yet!" Bianca yells. I don't respond. I'm already out the back door.
ooOoo
How the fuck was I going to get home? I didn't have a car. Emmett drove me here and it would take about three hours to walk back home. The icy air blue against my skin, tinting my cheeks pinks. I kept my head down as I walked around the corner, ignoring the strange looks I was earning. Tears prickled at the back of my eyes which was a combination of the frigid icy air and anger at Edward.
I was so fucking pissed. He didn't listen to me. Nobody listened to me. Everyone would know about Jacob and the trial and every other stupid idiotic thing I had done. They would treat me with pity. They would think I was crazy. I wouldn't be just Isabella.
After a few minutes of standing on the sidewalk, talking to myself like an idiot, I manage to reign in my emotions and bring myself together. I walk through the doors of the building next to me and I'm met by the sweet aroma of hot chocolate. I sit down at the first table I see and let myself sink down into the chair.
"How can I help you?" A man walks through the swinging door behind the counter. He stares at me for a few seconds before I realize he's waiting for a response. I'm the only person in the cafe.
"C-can I just have a hot chocolate?" I say the first thing on my mind.
"Whipped cream?" He grumbles.
I jerk my head up and down and he disappears through the swinging door. I wonder what Bianca knows. Has Edward told her everything about me? Or have they cozied up with each other yet? They looked pretty comfortable together.
The sound of the door ringing catches my frigid air from outside causes the hairs on the back of my kneck to stand up and pull the jacket tighter around my body. My hair covers my face and I turn slightly away, hoping they'll walk right past me.
But they don't.
"Bella?"
Edward. My head shoots up and can't help the sneer on my lips. I glare at him, causing him to stutter. He fiddles with the watch on his wrist but doesn't look away from me. His jaw is clenched and it looks like he wants to say something but something is stopping him.
I have nothing to say to him.
"I'm sorry." he exhales. His voice is rough and regretful, that much I can tell. He puts his hand on the chair and motions his head asking- can I sit down?
"No." is all I say.
"I bought you a book." he pulls it out of his bag and slides it across the table. I consider ignoring it but the title catches my eye.
Wuthering Heights. My favorite.
"I-"
"Yes. you've already read this book, I know." he cut me off and said exactly what I was going to say. "Your copy is all beat up so I thought that you'd enjoy a new one."
I bite my tongue and roll my eyes. He was a conceited, idiot, stupid ass boy. I hated him. I hated him so much I couldn't even describe it. That's how angry I am. But
"You promised. I whispered. "I told you specifically not to show up and you do the exact opposite-"
"I didn't think you'd freak out. I thought you were just embarrassed- I wanted to surprise you."
"Well it didn't work." I snap.
"Yeah, I'm figuring that out now." he whispered- yelled. The man walked back through the swinging door. He had a sour look on his face and didn't even spare Edward a glance.
I take a sip of the hot chocolate and spit it right back out. This tasted like shit.
"Look, I understand that you're pissed at me but let me take you home and we can talk about this in the car."
"You don't get to order me around. You are just like Jacob!" I hiss. A look of hurt flashes across his face and I instantly regret what I said. Edward wasn't Jacob- he was far from it. I could trust Edward. I loved Edward more than anything and I always managed to screw everything up with my goddamn stupid mouth!
"I-I'm sorry, Edward." my voice is just above a whisper. Tears stained my cheeks and he reaches his hand out. He cups my face and wipes away the tears with his thumbs. I hold onto his wrists with both hands and lean into his touch.
"Let's go home, Bella. Let me take you home."
He didn't have to say anything else.
ooOoo
Edward drove me home and we didn't exchange more than three words. His face was impassive and revealed nothing about what he was feeling or thinking. I wanted to apologize but something told me to keep my mouth shut.
After twenty minutes he pulled up in front of my house. Neither of us said a word or moved a muscle. Emmett's and Rosalie's car were parked in the driveway. I would have some explaining to do.
"I didn't tell that girl anything in the store." Edward said after a few moments of silence. "I was just another customer buying a book. She knows nothing about us."
"How-" the question lingers on my mouth. How did he know? He couldn't read minds. At least I thought he couldn't read my mind.
"I talked to Rosalie." he sighed. "You ran out of the bookstore and after I bought the book, I called Rose. I wanted to know why you were so upset. It all makes sense now."
"I'm sorry." is all I can say. What else is there to say? I compared him to a rapist. I think it's fair to say that I've won the award for the worst girlfriend in the entire world.
"You have nothing to be sorry for. You were angry and upset- rightfully so." he added on at the end. "You didn't mean what you said. I know that you didn't."
"I don't how I can make up for everything-" I gulped. "I know that you would never hurt me. You're nothing like Jacob. You are ten times the man."
He's looking out the window, away from me. I rest my hand on top of his but he pulls away.
"Edward?" I whisper. "Talk to me."
"We should take a break, Bella."
All the blood drains from my face. My chest heaves up and down, trying to interpret what he's saying.
"What have you called the past year? That was us taking a break and look what happened. Do you want to be apart for that long again?"
"I love you Bella, you have to understand that but being back here has just reminded me of all the reasons I left in the first place. There's too many things holding me back-!"
"Like what?" I raised my voice. "ME? Am I holding you back? Just remember that I told you time and time again that you didn't have to stay with me. You could have left long ago, Edward. I gave you an option to get out of this relationship but you never took it."
"This is exactly why I'm doing this Bella." he groaned. Edward humorously laughs and hits his head against the steering wheel. "I wanted to believe that there was some hope for us. I want to believe that we can be something more than we are now but I can't be at college while I'm constantly worrying about you. I love you so much that it hurts when you're not around. I don't want to do this Bella but this has crossed the line."
"If this is what I said earlier than I'm sorry. You don't know how sorry I- I am." my body was trembling and tears blurred my vision. This couldn't be happening. Everything was perfect and now it wasn't.
"This has nothing to do with Jacob." He sighs. "I understand that you've been through an ordeal but you can't run away from your problems and lash out at others whenever you're upset. You scared me half to death when you ran from the store today. I didn't know where you went, anything could have happened to you."
I want to scream. I want to shake some sense into him but I can't stop crying. I can't stop feeling. I don't want this pain.
Everything was fine. Everything was perfect.
"Don't do this Ed-ward." I hiccuped. "We can make things work."
Author's Note:
Hi y'all! I'm so so sorry that it's been so long! I've been dealing with some personal issues and it hasn't been the best time to write. But I am back and I hope to get back on track with updating! I hope that you enjoyed this chapter and thank you to everyone that has read and reviewed! I can't believe that I got to over 300 bookmarks! Thank you to everyone and I'm so grateful that you've given this story a chance! I hope to update again soon but until then, enjoy!