(Simon's POV)
We could all hear the gun go off from the room, Maddie's hands covered her mouth as tears began streaming from her eyes, out of compassion I grabbed and pulled her into a hug for comfort.
I couldn't hear what else was going on inside the room and that really worried me, looking to we made eye contact with each other.
"Aye Doc.." I motion my head for him to be the one and open the door, steady he turned the knob and slowly peered inside.
He turned to look at me and Negan for us to come in with him, with Maddie still beside I walked in and looked to see where Laura was standing.
Her back was to us as she looked down at Brents body, his eyes were partly opened as one bullet planted into his forhead. No sound came from Laura, she just stood there with no acknowledgement of us being there.
Looking around I couldn't see where the gun was, hoping that she had thrown it or placed somewhere.
"Laura...Laura Angel look at me." I said with worry in my voice, tilting her head to the side half her face showed to us.
I could see the tears that rolled down the tip of her chin, lips quivering as she began to turning around to face us.
My heart broke at the look of loss of hope and despair plastered all over her face, her hands were shaking uncontrollably but what caught my attention was she was still holding the gun and that gave me an awful feeling.
Gently pushing Maddie away towards Carson I began to make my way towards her, Laura's attention kept on going back to Brent and them to me.
"Angel...Angel baby look at me...I know what you're feeling right now, but please give me the gun.." I begged, her attention went back to me for a moment till her eyes moved over at Negan.
Instantly I saw the emotion change in her eyes as she raised the gun and aimed at him, of course Negan didn't do or saying anything but I looked and saw that he was a bit nervous.
Of course she's fucking beyond angry, none of us really know what's going through her head and what she'll might do.
"Laura don't do this.. I know you're angry at him but doing that won't change anything.. please Angel just hand me the gun." I begged again, her eyes moved back and forth from me to her.
"None of this would've happened if you had fucking listen to me...why didn't you go back for him?" She asked Negan, her eyes softened but still showed deep emotion.
"I should've sweetheart but I didn't and I'm so fucking sorry, trust me I know what the hell you're going through right now." Negan said in sincerity, Laura shook her head and glared at him.
"No..no you fucking don't... I had to kill the only family I had left and it's because of you.." she sobbed, when seeing her aim the gun away from Negan I felt relaxed but then my heart nearly stopped when she placed the gun into her mouth.
"Oh my God Laura don't please!" Maddie cried hysterically, Carson had to grab hold of her so she wouldn't run towards Laura in fear of her pulling the trigger on reaction.
"Sweetheart Laura look at me..look at me please. Don't do this please, trust me I know this fucking hurts. Believe me I know what it's like to lose someone you love, but doing this shit won't change anything it'll only hurt the people who care about you more." Negan said, in my surprise to hear him actually say something like that in front of other people besides me.
Laura's motion never changed, the gun trembling in her hand. I could see how much pain was in her eyes, the loss of Brent really put her over the edge.
"Angel he's right, this isn't what you want. It's going to be pain , but you'll get through this..we all will with you. Brent wouldn't want you to go out like this." I said, with each sentence I slowly made my way over to her.
I was within reach of grabbing the fun from her hands but I just placed it out in front, patiently waiting for her to make the right decision.
Looking at Negan and then to me Laura pulled back the gun from her mouth, her face showing regret at what she was trying to do to.
The gun fell down to the floor from how hard her body began trembling, she placed both her hands over her lips as she began to break down.
"I know Angel I know.." I said as I pulled her against my chest, her face buried into my shirt and began seeping with her tears.
Looking back over to Negan I see him staring at Laura with great remorse, he was never one to show emotion towards anyone in public but this was an exception.
Maddie managed to pull away from Carson and make her way over to us, coming up beside Laura she slipped her arms through us and hugged her.
Laura pulled her face away from me and looked at Maddie, their eyes met with each other for a moment before Laura quickly bear hugged her and broke apart in her arms.
Watching as both of them came down to the floor in each other's grasp, Maddie caressed her hand over Laura's head trying her best to soothe her pain all as well doing her best to keep it together.
"I'm so sorry Maddie.. I'm sorry!" She sobbed, her hands holding onto Maddie tightly.
"It's ok Laura... it's not your fault." Maddie assured, her eyes looking over to Brent's body and nearly double over but she quickly looked away and hugged Laura tighter.
I had to bite back from letting the tears form in my eyes, sighing I wiped at my face and turned to look at Negan.
(Normal POV)
Laura stayed pried in Maddie's arms, the tears blurred her vision that she couldn't see Simon nor Negan, so much was coming out of at once that Laura couldn't keep up with her emotions.
and Negans voice could be heard and then footsteps came over towards them, Simon had gently grabbed her up and away from Maddie. Her body still trembling and hands wiping at her eyes, pushing her hair away she could see his face clearly.
"Let's go get washed up and some food in you ok?" He said, Laura hesitated to respond when trying to not look in Brents direction.
Shaking her head Simon started guiding her out of the room, Negan helped Maddie up off the floor and gave her a comforting hug.
"Go help Simon with her and get yourself something to eat, later on we'll all meet up to say our peace." He said to her, Maddie nodded her head in agreement and made her way to follow behind Simon.
Looking back at he watched as he was preparing to clean up his body, using surgical scissors to tear off his bloodied clothes.
"I'm going to go freshen up and inform the men about the news, make sure that he's properly decent for later." He ordered, Carson looked at him and couldn't help but see the hurt in his eyes.
"Yes sir" he said then continued taking off the later article of clothes, Negan began walking out the room and heard the running of water start on from the sink.
Walking up the sets of stairs Negan made it up to his office without being stopped or distracted, it was until he shut the door and locked it behind that the built-up emotions in his chest we're starting to seeping through.
Going to his liquor storage he pulled out a bottle of Gin and a glass, pouring himself a drink and engulfed it in a single sip.
One drink turned into two, then four and then six, tears began forming at his eyes so he shoved the glass away and just started drinking directly from the bottle.
I should've fucking listened to her, why did I have to be so God damn hard headed.. it's my fault that he got bit and I just fucking left like a coward. It's all my fault..all my God Damn Fault!
So engulfed with anger at himself Negan chucked the bottle across the room and watched it shatter against the wall, leaning at his desk he couldn't stop the tears that began rolling down his face.
Using one hand he held himself to balance and used the other to cover his face, his body shook as he silently sobbed.
"I fucked up...I'm sorry kid..." He apologized.
On the next floor below Simon was leading Laura down to her room, Maddie was following behind in silence. Of course there were some of the Saviors in the hallway but they didn't stop or speak to them, from how they stared at them they have an idea of what happened.
Opening the door Laura walked into the room not even bothering to turn on the light, reaching at the wall Simon flipped the switch and turned it on.
"Alright Angel... Maddie's going to help you getting cleaned up and dressed. I'm going to go get us three something to eat from the cafeteria, I'll be back.. please watch her." Simon said pointing to Maddie before he left out the room and shutting the door behind him.
Maddie had somewhat calmed down from balling her eyes, going towards Laura's drawers she decided to find something to wear.
"Go ahead and take a shower while I find you an some clean clothes" she said, Laura nodded in response and walked over to the bathroom, she was about to close the door till Maddie spoke again.
"Leave the door open.. please.." she asked politely but in another meaning, Laura didn't bother to argue and just complied.
Stripping off her clothes Laura turned on the shower head and waited for the right temperature to her liking, Maddie took a glance when hearing the water go off and almost began to cry again when seeing the dark bruises on her back and arms.
All of those were from when she went out to go save Brent, after all that pain she'd gone through was only to end his life.
Turning away Maddie went back to looking for something to wear for her, when the steam started forming up in the ceiling Laura stepped in and closed the curtain.
The hot water soothed the bruises on her skin, placing her head directly underneath the shower head the water wet her hair and trailed down her face.
Just standing there like a lifeless statue and letting everything that happened slowly soak into her mind.
Brent was gone, the only family she loves and had left in this world be taken away. Having to experience the same heart wrenched scenario from almost six years ago, Laura didn't know if she can even go on with herself without Brent.
Clenching her hands into fists all the blame she felt on herself for him dying began to built up inside, lashing out she full on started punching at the shower tiled wall.
Continuously hitting at the same spot every time, the pain on her knuckles started to come but she kept going. As the tile shattered and broke off the wall it cut at her skin causing her hands to bleed and trail down her arms.
Maddie quickly ran inside the bathroom and pulled back the shower curtain, panicking when watching what Laura was doing to herself.
"Laura stop it, sweetie please stop it!" She screamed and rushed into the shower to pull her away from hurting anymore, not even caring about getting drenched in the process.
Laura allowed her to move her away from the wall and hold her body, her hands stinging badly and bleeding non-stop. But she didn't even care about the pain or the fact she was being pulled out the shower and bleeding all over her clean bathroom floor.
Brent was gone, he's dead and there's nothing that can fix or change that. Even after all the bullshit he's thrown at her or fights they've had she loved that asshole to death and would give anything to have him back.
"I hate myself Maddie, it's all my fault he's gone...it's all my fault." Laura began to cry, Maddie grabbed a towel hanging from the wall hanger and started drying off her body and putting pressure on her knuckles to stop from bleeding.
"Listen to right now, it's not your fault do you hear me. Things happen that we have no control over, he's gone and it fucking kills me. But I'm not going to let his death be my down fall and I'll be damned if you put blame on yourself." Maddie said determinedly, Laura looked at her with sadness, not knowing to accept her words.
Having her hold the towel on her hands Maddie grabbed another towel and wrapped it around Laura to cover her naked body, making sure it was held up she tended to her knuckles.
"I loved your brother Laura, hell he was the greatest thing to ever come into my life and now he's gone, I'm going to be hurting for a long time I'm not going to deny it but I'm gonna keep my promise to his last dying wish and that is to watch over you.
Because I'm not going to let you hang this over your head and make you do something that'll kill me even more and break Simons heart." She said while wrapping bandage sauge around her knuckles, Laura couldn't help but feel deeply touched at Maddie's heartfelt honesty.
Shaking her head Laura accepted her speech and demands, her tears still coming down her face.
"Ok...ok I'm sorry" she apologized and reach out to hug her, Maddie returned her hug and shared that private moment together.
(Laura's POV)
Dried off and dressed I sat on the bed staring down at my bandaged hands, Maddie was in the bathroom cleaning up the broken tile on the shower floor. Now that I'm finally calmed down I feel stupid for acting out like that, mentally I can hear Brents lecturing voice tell me to stop it and toughen up.
The sound of my door open startled me, looking over to see Simon holding three trays of food.
When his eyes looked over to me I tried to put on a face smile, placing the trays on the table he looked around to see where Maddie was.
"Where's Maddie at?" He asked, her voice called out from the bathroom answering his question.
Before he could tell me what he brought us his eyes went down to my knuckles, his brows raised in confusion and concern.
"What happened to your hands?" He asked, I looked away from him and tried to avoid his stern gaze.
I could hear his footsteps and felt his weight come beside me in the bed, his hand grabbed at my wrists to avoid touching the bandage.
"Laura what did you do to your hand, please Angel tell me." He begged, I tried to look him in the eyes and tell him but Maddie beat me to it
" She punched at the tile in the shower, cut her knuckles up really bad." She said then went over to the small garbage can and dumping the contents in the dustpan.
"Angel why did you do that?!" He asked demandingly, I couldn't help but flinch at the tone of his voice.
Placing my hands against my chest I looked at Simon with guilt in my eyes, his face softened when he saw me.
"I'm sorry Simon, I just acted out and didn't know what to do" I admitted, his hand let go of my wrists and went around to pull me close against his side.
I willingly leaned my head on his shoulder, just being like this with him made me begin to feel at ease. Simon rubbed up the side of my arm and kissed the top of my forhead, looking over at Maddie I could see a smile tug in her lips when seeing his gesture.
"I'm going to go shower and get ready, Si are you alright with her by yourself?"Maddie asked while as she claimed her food tray from the table.
"Yeah we'll be ok, Negan said at quarter to six we're all meeting in lunch hall." He informed, nodding her head Maddie smiled at me before exciting my room.
The room fell silent now, I decided to go grab my food tray from the table but Simon beat me to it and brought it to the bed.
" Here you go Angel..." He said with a smile, grabbing from his hands we started eating our food.
There was an awkward feel to the air, I couldn't think of anything to say or talk about.
How can you start up a conversation after having your brother die?
"So..Negan wants to know what do you want to do with Brents body." Simon said out of nowhere, it really caught me off guard.
Placing the food tray on the bedside I sat in silence to really come up with a answer, this is something not even me nor Brent were ever prepare for.
Of course we discussed if one of us would meet our demise the other will have a say in what to do with our body, I told Brent that if I were to die before him that I'd want him to take my body back to our home and bury me next to our parents.
Of course that wouldn't have been possible but he still promised it would be done, Brent never really gave me an idea of what to do if he'd die.
You know where I'd want to be if I knew it would be my last day on Earth?... That old tower we found a few months ago, just looking at that sunset over the horizon one last time would make me a happy dead man.
Simon looked over at me and saw tear roll off my chin, reaching out his hand cupped my face and wiped at the tears in my eyes.
"Hey...if you don't want to talk about this now..." He began saying but I shook my head and grabbed his hand.
" No it's ok... I was just thinking of what I want to do... I want to cremate his body." I said, his expression didn't seem to change for the next few seconds but he scooted closer and side hugged me.
"If that's what you want Angel...ok we'll go tell Dr Carson and Negan when Maddie gets back." He said, sighing with content I closed my eyes and leaned against him.
"This doesn't feel real...no one deserves to be going through all of this." I said with a raspy voice, Simon sighed and pulled me closer almost straddling in his lap.
"I know Angel..but things will get better." He said assuringly, looking in his eyes I pressed my lips against his.
Or course this is probably not the right time to be doing this, but I really need to feel something else right now it her then pain and depression.
Kissing Simon makes me feel uplifted and like nothing else matters, but even just closing my eyes I can still see his face.
I won't ever be able to see his face anymore, or hear his sarcastic attitude and words of older brother wisdom. Even after all the fights we've had and no matter how much thing's happened between us there's no one that can replace my brother.
Simon pulled away when I began shaking I'm his arms, concern in his eyes when I tried hard not to fall apart.
"I'm sorry Simon... I'm so sorry" I apologized not only to him, but to Maddie, my parents and to myself.
Simon placed his hand on the back of my head and pulled me close to his chest, slowly rocking himself to soothe help soothe me.
"It's ok Angel, it's ok." His voice carried, I could feel something wet hit against my hair but I didn't mind at all.
(Normal POV)
Negan told everyone to meet up in the yard, Brents body was prepared and laid out in the wooden pannels that prepared.
The news about what happened didn't take to long to spread around, Aarat was devastated about what Laura had to go through and for the loss of Maddie's love, she was about the last person to show up when seeing Laura and Simon together with Maddie.
Laura was listening to what Maddie was saying when seeing Aarat coming towards them, her arms spread out open ready to give a hug.
"I'm so sorry Laura." She said with tears swelling in her eyes, Laura accepted her hug and kissed her cheek.
Maddie came up beside and hugged them both, Simon stood behind watching as all three of them embraced each other in grief and heartbreak.
Pulling away from their hug Laura felt a soft tap on her shoulder, turning around and surprised to see Negans wives all together coming to her.
"Laura...I just..we want to say we're sorry for Brent. And if there's anything you need, we're here for you." Sherry said, Laura gave a soft smile and placed her hand over Sherry's.
"Thank you." She said in gratitude, Sherry was about to say something when Frances said to start heading over to where Negan requested them to be.
When they all started walking away Laura saw Amber being the last one behind, their eyes met for a moment till she looked away. She couldn't help but notice it looked like she was crying, not bothering to question it Negans voice called to everyone's attention.
"Thank you for coming to pay your respects,last night we lost a good man, probably the best damn good Savior I've met and had the pleasure to work with.
Brent was just a young kid when we found him and Laura, but I got to see that kid grow into a decent man. Shit...is it me or is it fucking hot out here?" He asked with a nervous cough, Laura could tell that making this speech was taking allot out of him.
Walking over Laura placed a hand on his shoulder to stop him, Negan looked at her and saw her smile softly.
"Thank you Negan, I'll take it from here." She said, he nodded with a grunt before stepping aside.
Laura wasn't really prepared to make a speech, of course you can't really expect anyone to in a situation like this. But for some reason she felt like it was the right thing to do, she didn't want everyone to just remember Brent as just a Savior.
"Thank again for coming, I know this isn't the first time we've had to say out goodbyes to people we lost. As many of you know Brent was a great guy, he took his job as A Savior seriously and always saw the good in people...
When we first met Negan me and him were on our own, we lost everything we loved and despite not knowing what to do Brent never gave up hope, it fucking hurts knowing that he's gone. He was more than my brother, he was my best friend, my guardian...the only family I had left and now he's gone.
That's why I'm going to find the people who were responsible for attacking our outpost and they're going to pay for what they did. They're gonna pay, Brents death will have justice I promise you that." She said with determination and tears on her face, looking to Negan she nodded her head.
Negan motioned for Carson to begin pouring the lighter fluid underneath the wooden pannels, Laura watched worth shakey breaths as the liquid was being dosed all into the wood.
When finished Carson had a long paper stick and a box of matches, coming to Laura he looked at her with remorse and handed the items in his hands to her.
Laura took them from him and began to light the paper stick, her hands were shaking the entire team but she managed to light the paper without problem.
Watching fire form on the stick Laura walked over the the wood pannel and looked down at Brents body, the dark depression was slowly coming back but her mind weilded over it.
Brent wouldn't want me to end my life in pain, I'm going make sure who ever caused his death will suffer.
With a last far well Laura threw the stick into the liquid puddle and watched as the entire wooden pannel underneath engulf in flames.
Everyone watched in silence as Brents body began to cover in flames, Maddie was hugging Aarat while crying softly.
Simon came up besides Laura and placed his arm around her shoulder, she didn't flinch or say a word but just watch the fire engulf everything.
Negan stood there and watched as Laura stare at the flames, tears streaming down her face but she didn't look upset anymore, there was only vengeance in her eyes.