The Diego Diaries: Party (dd6 317)
-0-A long winding driveway at a highly secured farm north of New York City
They drove up the driveway which was tree-lined with wooden snow fences along both sides. Sheep and cows grazed in the fields as the road gave way to a big beautiful rambling farmhouse built in the late 1700's and added onto over the decades. It had been in Maureen's family since the beginning and the 250 acres with it were filled with orchards, a huge prepped field for a kitchen garden and animals.
Dogs barked as they parked along the drive, a group of ten concept cars unlike any other. They had come through a bridge to this place and a short drive to the party. Stepping out, they were greeted by both Witwickys, both Morshowers, Bolger-Settles and Fultons as well as the Army femmes.
After a moment of happy greetings, it got quiet again.
Judy Witwicky was staring at Ratchet with her usual directness. "Ratchet … where did you get your fashion ideas?"
Everyone turned to look at Ratchet who felt suddenly self conscious. "What?" he asked with surprise.
"Okay," Judy said as the other women nodded, "all of you with us. You boys? Take care of the bots. You females, with us." She turned and began to walk toward the house. She slowed. "Elita and Arcee? You, too. Neo and Laret, you look great."
The bots hesitated, then followed.
Neo and Laret looked at each other, then Prime. "Should we go, too? It appears to be a femme thing."
Prime shrugged. "It might be wise."
Neo and Laret walked past them and caught up. All of them entered the house and were gone.
The bots stared at the house, then each other. "What does that mean, Warren?" Prime asked with a touch of confusion.
Warren who like everyone else was struggling to keep himself from laughing turned toward Prime. "I think they're getting a touch of fashion advice for the party. Shall we go up? Everyone is going to be here soon enough."
Together, the group followed Warren and a chuckling Glenn Morshower to the house. They would pass a glorious Cybertronian crystal garden in the front lawn, one that Maureen had specially designed at Specialty Fabrication-Decor, Art and Home. They would even send three of their artisan mini-cons to install it. It sparkled like fire as the group walked toward it, paused a moment to admire its beauty, then disappeared into the house.
-0-Inside
They walked into a huge house with homey touches and tremendous warmth and charm. Walking up stairs, they walked down a sunlit hallway to the master suite with its sunny spaces and full length mirror. Everyone entered, then waited rather nervously for the human women to speak. They were at the moment silently considering everyone.
"Where did you get your fashion ideas, boys?" Judy Witwicky asked as she cut to the chase.
The bots glanced at each other, then the women. "Uh, the usual places … media … the internet," Alor said as he shrugged.
"MTV, movies, fashion websites and magazines, television … soap operas … wikipedia, reality tv."
Everyone looked at Delphi.
He shrugged. "I like the big hair."
"MTV, fashion blogs … websites and stuff," Ratchet said as he stood self consciously in his rather risque garb.
"That's not … normal attire for most things," Maureen said with a grin. "You need an assist and as fellow Cybertronians we feel the need to help."
The femmes glanced at each other, then their attire. They were wearing ripped jeans, Doc Martens, tight t-shirts over negligible cleavage and jackets. No makeup. No jewelry. "What's wrong with this?"
"Nothing, if you were going to a gang fight," Judy Fulton said with a chuckle. "Ratchet, no offense. You know you're loved but you look like a floozy."
Everyone scanned for meaning, then laughed.
"That's the word I was searching for, Loon, when someone asked me about you the other orn," Prowl said before Ratchet slapped the back of his head.
Ratchet grinned. "Then what do we do? We only know what we see."
Lois Morshower-Howell pushed him in front of the mirror. "How do you change your image?" she asked.
"With images from the database or good small suggestions," Prowl said as he grinned at Ratchet.
"Okay," Judy Fulton said as she rubbed her hands together. "Can you modify the cleavage for starts? Use math to make it proportional." She grinned. "I was good at math in school."
Ratchet smirked at her, did the math, then he morphed. It was a huge improvement.
"Fuck. I want that tech," Judy Witwicky said as she sat on a chair nearby.
Huge laughter and agreement.
"How about a summer dress? This is a garden party and barbecue. That might work elsewhere but not here. Scan for one, Ratchet. Something with a full enough skirt that it swishes when you walk," Judy F said.
A momentary morph and he wore a light yellow summer dress. He grinned. "This works?"
"Indubitably," Judy F said as everyone laughed. "Now get flat shoes so you don't sink in the lawn that match the biggest color you're wearing, something cute in a sandal, make the jewelry simple and find a shade of red that occurs in nature and can't be found in a child's crayon box for your hair."
Ratchet laughed and complied. He was a bit shorter but immeasurably better. As he was morphing, so were the others. Gone were the strange clothing choices and here were nice garments, sensible and attractive shoes along with simple jewelry, hair and hair colors. By the time they got to makeup -"day time makeup, girls, scan for images'-all of them looked fit for a high class party in the boonies.
Elita who was sitting on the bed in a DRESS with Neo who looked sweet in hers looked at Ratchet. "We have no idea how you femmes work. All we know is your media. How do you manage with this slag all the time? We don't have to paint our faces and wear weird shoes. What do you really think of the difference between us and you?"
"I think you have it easier but I like being a girl," Judy W said as she inspected everyone. "There's nothing like being a girl."
"I think we need to make a new girl rule here," Maureen said as she sat beside Laret on a love seat. "Raise your right hands and repeat after me."
They stared at her, then each other, then raised their hands.
"I, insert your name here, do hereby swear," Maureen began.
"I, Alor/Ratchet/Prowl (warily)/Elita/Arcee/ Neo/Laret/Turbine/Delphi, do hereby swear ..."
"That if I ever have to be a girl again you will contact one of us immediately." -Maureen laughing
HUGE laughter.
"That if I EVERhave to be a girl again I will contact one of you immediately." -all of them including Prowl
Prowl grinned, then looked at the others. They looked as good as could be and would blend a great deal better than before. "You have your orders. We have to mingle and check out the slaggers on Warren's list. Some of them have good ideas but we don't know much about them. If you find yourself in trouble ping someone and they'll come pull you out. Any questions?"
No one did so they walked out to the living room where the others were waiting.
Ratchet twirled, then grinned. "Neo and Laret were the only ones to pass inspection."
"This is different and I can see it's better somehow. We better have a sit down on how to blend in with pretender gear here on both sides of the gender divide. Its clear we have a problem with camo," Jazz said with a grin. "However, there's nothing wrong with this," he said spreading his arms wide as he stood next to Mirage looking hot and appropriate.
"Slaggers. See if you EVER dump another detail on me," Ratchet said.
They goofed a moment, then walked through the house heading for the party that was gathering outside. Several hundred were already there, walking around the house toward the scene in the back. Some of them watched newcomers walk out with their hosts and other VIPs and felt the burn. They had walked around instead of through the house. They would have to find out who they were.
Such was the pecking order in the 1% anywhere.
Maureen halted them before the group. She grinned. "We have a special guest here, someone who wants to film on Mars. We know he holds a special place in your spark. He's around here somewhere. We invited Michael Bay."
Groans and laughter greeted that as they then continued forward. They would break up and meander around, meeting others, having drinks and canapes as they gathered to do what they came for. Intel for Warren Roberts.
Some of them would also hunt for Michael Bay.
-0-Around the party
"So, Orion, what do you do?" a business mogul asked who was part of the push for the space station between Earth and Mars.
"I am a philosopher," Prime said with a slight grin. Prime according to Prowl was a wealthy philosopher who wrote groundbreaking books on how to live an ethical life and he, Prowl was the editor. They were friends of the Roberts who often vacationed with them on the Mediterranean and shared a beach house in Hawaii. They lived on a mountain top near the Canadian border.
So sayeth The Prowl.
Prime who was laughing loudly on the inside as he went through the hoops grinned at the business man's blank stare. "I am working out a very esoteric point of view that postulates not only is the unexamined life not worth living, neither is the life that is lived in isolation, ie, the interconnectedness of all that is. We are at essence ethical beings with deep ties to the well being of all that is."
The businessman stared at him, then nodded. "Okay."
Nearby …
Ratchet was sipping champagne in a nice glass as he hovered near Bryce Billings and Tawny Mantree, the lead actors in The Bridge, the longest running bot-human television series which was based on Mars. It was a hard hitting crime drama and they were the two leads. That they were two of the most famous actors on Earth before this was also interesting.
Mantree, a UK citizen was beautiful, cultured and sweet. Billings was rugged, handsome and stalked by half the women of Earth. The buzz was that their chemistry on screen was also true for real life.
A fan grrl could hope.
They were talking to several individuals who were in business and government. One of them was questioning them about life on Mars. "What's it like to work there?"
"Great. I love it. It's the most interesting place I've ever been and the tech they use is amazing. The crew is tight and the scripts really well done. The author, Nitro of Vos is always there to talk to. He works with Ironhide in the Armory," Bryce said as Tawny nodded.
"How much of the city and stuff can you see? I heard that Earth 1 and the company has the right to go here and there now," another said.
"We do. We have the same access as N.E.S.T. and Sciences. Earth 1 and our company are no longer on probation by Primal decree," Bryce said.
"It's great to come and go," Tawny said.
"What about some of the places off limits? What about the Temple? Can you go there?" someone asked.
"We can. They only have high security danger areas off limits, though we're going to use the prison in the story next season," Bryce said. The show was currently on hiatus and both were here to make a movie during their down time.
"What's it like there? What do you see when you go? Have you?" the businessman asked.
Bryce considered the question. "We have but you're not going to know. It's a matter of trust. We aren't going to break it. We love what we do and being there. We're not going to tell anyone what you're not supposed to know."
Ratchet grinned. Bryce was on the future husband's list. He would linger and listen but Bryce and Tawny would hold their ground. They would in turn never know who sent the rare wine and expensive chocolates to their apartments when they returned to Mars later on.
Ratchet turned to glance around and saw Michael Bay standing nearby talking to movie people. Grinning slightly, he walked across the grassy lawn to his next target, Public Frenemy #1 of Autobot Nation.
-0-TBC 4-3-18 01-22-2022