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Her head was pounding. It was the wine, she knew it. And the tears. She had cried so much before falling asleep. She had cried for her mother, long gone and thus unable to hold her while she felt sad. She had cried for herself, a broken woman, incapable of overcoming her demons from the past. She had cried because she was angry at herself, at her father, and at him. What had she done? Kissing a man she barely knew, a man she thought she hated but whom she had enjoyed the soothing presence when he had played for her. She had been drunk but conscious of what was happening to her. She rarely forgot now that she was used to the feeling. But she wanted to, they had started to build a relationship of respect and she had ruined it, surrendering to her stupid desires to be a woman like any other. At least she could have chosen a man with more than half a face. She slapped herself at the thought. He was more a man that she could ever dream of, she had seen it, hidden behind her rock on the small beach. Yesterday had been a complicated day and she had managed to ruin whatever was the relationship they had started to build. She knew he was disgusted of her. After what she had lived no man would want to touch her anyway, she should continue the way she had done until then. No emotions, no feelings, be successful and dive into work.

Today was the day when she had to review what had been done so far in the Casino. Gather all the workers and architects, the investors and supervisors, make a speech, ask and answer some questions. If only it was that simple… He would be there. She had to face him and she would. But she would also avoid any other kind of conversation with him, not as if he would want to talk with her anymore… How she hated herself! She wanted to tell this story to someone but she was too ashamed with herself for now. She would first have to process it which should take about a week and a few bottles of wine, and then she might evoke the incident to Claire and Josephine.

She woke up, bathed and readied herself for the long day to come.

On his side Erik had had troubles sleeping. He played and replayed what happened in Hortense's house in his mind. What she had confess to him, how she had cried over it, she didn't have an easy life either. He remembered what Jeanne had told him once:

"You have suffered a great deal, I know it. But you have to understand that a lot of people in this world have had a complicated life too, you're not the only one that has the right to claim he's hurt. At one point you'll have share with someone what you went through, and you also have to accept that someone tells you how hard his or her life is. You have a strong heart and a resistance to the rest of the world that you have built since you were a child if I understand it well, mmmh? Don't wallow in self-hatred and self-pity, it stops you from going forward, it stops you from getting what you really want. You told me you lived hidden from the rest of the world for years because the world didn't want you. That's not true, some persons were mean with you, there's always stupid and mean people and you should spit at their faces and continue on your way like nothing happened. It should not affect you! You are young, strong and from what I can see good looking. No! Don't! I mean it, half a handsome face can be better than a full ugly face. What lies under your mask only matters for you! So many people have disfiguration due to the war and despite the trauma they continue to fight for a life on this planet. You're intelligent and an amazing musician you could become whatever you want. Just accept who you are, what you've been through and also accept to allow some persons to get to you. Accept that it's rare to find someone left unscathed by life on this planet!"

She was right, she was always right. He was not alone in his suffering and despite her beauty and strength Hortense was a broken creature, pitifully sticking to an old addiction that poisoned her mind. It had taken him time to get rid of his addiction to morphine. He had managed to gradually reduce the quantities but it had taken years. He had stop for Christine, because he wanted to be conscious of every moment he would spend in her presence. During almost ten years of his life he had gone on and on with injections. When he was in Persia, when he was an assassin… He had to forget too. His life had become a bloody chaos between killing, hating, crying and taking drugs. He was too absent of his own life to realise he could have had any girls willing to lie down for protection. He could have known what he would always be denied. Always? He could have done it yesterday! With her. She wanted it didn't she? She had started to kiss him, and what a kiss, her lips had been full and moist against his, she was soft but demanding… Why the hell did he stop? Had he become good? She had moved him and thus he knew she did it because she was drunk, not because she was willingly throwing herself in his arms. Such a beautiful woman, even broken, wouldn't want anything with him. But if he understood it well she had been used to giving herself while drunk. That's why she had done it, simple. She would hate him now… And he had to see her at work…

A few hours later, about forty people were gathered in the main room of the Casino Bellevue. Erik was amongst them, staring blankly at the little stage where the stakeholders would make their speech. After a bit of waiting he saw her, standing straight in her black dress closed up to her neck. She was wearing black lace which covered her skin from the middle of her cleavage to the middle of her neck. From where he was he could see the swell of her breast under the fine lace. It seemed that every time he was in the presence of this woman he was either angry, busy at hating her or willing to cover her with hungry kisses. That last state of mind made him want to hate her more, but he found it hard since their conversation the night before.

Their eyes met, his were as unreadable as possible but animated with a fire that she had not yet seen in his blue-green orbs. Hers were determinate but she winced when she crossed his stare. She was not ready to face him. She continued to walk to the middle of the stage, trying not to think about him or about anything. She made her speech, answered and asked questions. She thanked everyone and gave the next steps to follow for the future week that would precede the great opening. She quickly retreated to the other side of the building.

That's how they managed not to talk to one another for a week and half. They would cross each other's path at work but avoid any kind of conversation. Fortunately, after the renovation work had been finished on the casino, Erik returned to Antonio's office to work with him on other projects. He was highly congratulated for his patience when working with Hortense and was promised to work on a major enterprise. He had clenched his teeth when talking to the man as the images of the crying woman came back into his mind. Couldn't he see that he was the cause of all her problems? Now that he knew the story he could not see Antonio Moretti the way he had before. But the man was always happy and gave him interesting ideas to work on, the only thing he had to do was to close his eyes and continue his life as he generally did. Meddling in family traumas was not what he was looking for and he would avoid it as long as he could. He was being selfish and he didn't care. He owed her nothing, so he would mind his own business.

As neighbours, even after he no longer worked for her, he still bumped into her from time to time. They just did as they had done for days: continue on their way without saying anything; too blinded by their own pride. Things became even more complicated for Hortense after an unexpected dream. She had awakened with a gasp an unfamiliar heat between her thighs. Her cheeks had turned red when the image of the fiery passion between her and a masked man that looked very much alike Monsieur de Raincourt came back to mind. First she had made a fool of herself by showing her drunk self to this man, kissing him foolishly, and now she was having some kind of fantasy dreams about the amazing things he would do with his tongue… She should stop listening to her friends. She had been seeing them the day before and had told them the problem with her new neighbour.

"You kissed him?" Josephine had said in awe. Hortense had nodded, looking at her millefeuille shamefully.

"And you were drunk? Oh Hortense, you need to stop those old habits of yours! He's gone and he won't come back to hurt you anymore. You can start living again, and you seem to be going the right way… I saw him with your father the other day, apart from the mask, well… He looks like a gothic novel's hero, tall and dark, but with a soft side and…"

"Hum, hum." Josephine coughed to stop Claire in her day dreams. "Francois wouldn't be very happy if he knew your thoughts on Hortense's neighbour!"

"Not to worry my dear, there is absolutely no risk for me to go and seek some comfort elsewhere, we have just tried some new amazing bed sport that would make you both blush. He is amazingly supple, and god knows what he can do with his tongue…"

"Please, we're in a respectable place and I wouldn't like anybody to overhear." Hortense had interrupted, looking very embarrassed as the shadow of a blush could be seen on her olive skin.

"Sorry Hortense, you know… You're young and beautiful and there's no doubt that he finds you so. You need to force destiny my dear! You have to show him you're interested and he will come…" Claire had whispered with a smile.

"Who told you I was interested?" Had said Hortense, louder than she had intended, provoking some surprised stares from the other customers of the café place. "Sorry… It would be the worst idea of my life anyway, he is a pompous jerk! Yes, sorry to speak such a rude language in your presence but it has to be said. He had been nothing but mean to me… And I to him. Except that night… And he fled away after our kiss anyway. I just need to forget it happened and continue my business as usual and…"

"Tss, tss… No my darling." Claire had said. "Stop making simple things complicated. Sex is easy. You need someone to make you forget the other pig. That's what you need! You're a widow, not a blushing virgin, thus you can do whatever you want as long as you stay discrete!"

"Maybe I don't want to do anything, and especially not with him! Could we please change the subject of conversation? I told you what happened, end of the story." Josephine and Claire had shared a knowing look and had resumed the conversation gossiping about who might come to the season.

It seemed that their conversations were not having a positive effect on her dreams and thus on her mental state. She needed some air to forget about those heated kisses she had shared with… Oh she had to get away from this place. She quickly dressed up and went to prepare her horse. She would gallop along the coast and settle wherever her mind would let her.

She decided to get down on the beach and push her horse to full speed, she loved this feeling of freedom, her hair waving behind her. She finally stopped on a small beach next to the little creek where she had seen… No. No more thinking. She jumped down her horse and took off her high boots, exposing her legs to the warm air. She went to the water and enjoyed the feeling of the waves on her bare feet.

Not very far away, Erik was riding Éclair, like almost every morning, galloping on the sand. The stallion seemed never tired and Erik had to dedicate some time every day to make sure he would take him out. He preferred the morning for he was sure to never meet anybody on his way, but sometimes he would do it at nightfall. He had liked the previous couple of weeks. It was quiet and uneventful but it had allowed him to focus on his work for Moretti and also on more personal projects. He had started composing again, just a few piano concertos but it was better than nothing for he had thought that his music would stop with Christine's departure. He had even managed to get rid of the presence of his neighbour into his thoughts. He passed on to a slow trot, that's where he saw a silhouette half immerged into the water. He decided not to stop if the person had not noticed him. As he got closer, he could see more of the silhouette. Well shaped legs and full muscled thighs half hidden by a long shirt, long dark brown curls floating on her back; it was definitely a woman. She turned, obviously alarmed by the clapping of Éclair's hooves on the sand.

"No way…" Erik swore. Why was fate that cruel with him?

Hortense had heard the noise of what sounded like a horse approaching. It was rare to meet someone that early on the beach, especially on a horse… It couldn't be a fisher they didn't travel on horses. Oh God; she was not properly dressed, should anyone find her here they would take her for a lose woman. She had almost stumbled into an old fisher while coming back of her early morning swims at the beginning of the autumn. The water had been still warm enough but she had decided to wait for spring to go back there. Last time she had wanted to dive into the Ocean it was her bloody neighbour she had stumbled on… Not properly dressed either. So, who was this person approaching, did she need to dive into the water to hide?

"Shit…" It was him. Of course it had to be him anyway. Fate had decided to trouble her nights and piss her off no matter what she did. She panicked, dive into the water, run to her horse, simply vanish? Not that the last option was possible but why would her leg not work? Her arms went on her breasts, she was not wearing a corset and then, she stayed still, aghast.

"I… I… Hi?" Erik proposed uncomfortable, shifting positions on his saddle and looking at the sand.

"What… What are you doing here?" She breathed walking a bit deeper into the water and tightening her grip around her to hid whatever she could.

"I should be the one asking, I have been galloping on the coast almost every morning for two weeks… I haven't seen you before." He said meeting his eyes, obviously annoyed.

"I… Well, here I am… Hum do you mind turning your back… I… I am not properly dressed."

She had just said that when a wave crashed on her, making her lose her balance and fall into the salted water. Erik's eyes widened in awe, not because he was afraid she would drown but because when she rose up he could see everything as her shirt was clinging to all her curves. He almost decided to leave but decided it was rude and he couldn't do it twice, as this time, it was not her fault. So he set foot on earth and went to her horse to grab her coat and walked to her looking away, handing her the piece of clothes. He was impressed with himself, so much self-control and gentleman like behaviour in what he had just done. Jeanne would have been happy with him.

"Th… Thanks." She said, tearing the coat from his grasp and pulling it on. "It's okay, I mean, I am more decent now… You… You can raise your eyes. I mean, if you want, you don't have to… I was just saying that I am not wet and almost naked anymore… Well I am still very wet but… Oh Jesus… Bloody hell, what am I saying, forget that please…" She blushed, horrified by what has just escaped her mouth.

Erik was about to implode. He could not meet her eyes as he felt his pants tightening at her words and after he replayed in his mind what he had just seen. That was cruel, so cruel to torture him like that.

"Please, stop talking… No harm has been done… Yet." He said huskily, meeting her gaze. He was fire, she thought. His beautiful eyes were animated by a fire that seemed to burn him alive. Was it because he saw her? Did he find her attractive, despite what he knew? Even after what she had just said? Was it a lustful stare as Claire would described when talking about Francois? Was she ready for that? What was she thinking about? Why her mind seemed to stop working properly when facing this masked man? Why was he talking about harm? Would he harm her? Oh, had she been too far? Was she being insulting?

"I… It wasn't meant to offend… I rarely find myself in such a humiliating and pitiful position. Can I have some space, I…"

Something switched in his stare, which made her take a step back.

"Humiliating and pitiful? And you walk away from me?"

"I am not… Well I am but… What's happening?" She said taking another step back as he moved forward. How could he change from a blushing passionate man to a crazy and angry beast?

"Do I frighten you? You didn't seem that frightened by my proximity the last time we were together…"

"I don't allow you to… I was drunk and… Oh Jesus I thought we were passed the childish behaviours. It happened and I am sorry, but I…"

"Oh, there's nothing childish in this situation. So, I understand better now, is it because you were drunk that you decided to jump into my arms? It's easier to forget you're kissing a monster when being in a drugged…"

The slap came. Quick but strong. She was boiling, her eyes red with unshed angry tears. Erik raised his hand to his mask to check it was still in place, before widening his eyes at her sight.

"HOW DARE YOU? After what I told you… Oh yes you are a bloody monster… You, heartless jerk, how can you say…? Oh…"

She put a hand in front of her opened mouth as the tears started to run down her cheeks. She started to run to her horse, jumped into her boots and put her horse to gallop.

Erik stayed still for a time, how did he manage to ruin everything again? She had not meant any harm this time, why did he have to push her? Why? It had been the last straw, when he had felt the slap he had wanted to slap her too but then he had seen her eyes. That's when he realised he had been too far. It was as if someone had blamed him for taking morphine to forget that he was killing in the name of the Khanum… It was true but cruel. Now she really thought him a monster. No… No, he couldn't let her… He needed to apologize. How he had deserved this slap. Something had switched within him when he had seen her, dripping wet, in nothing but a very transparent shirt. How he had wanted to kiss her in that moment. But he had done the most proper thing he had ever done since he had laid Christine on his bed and had left her alone to sleep. It had taken all his self-control. Why couldn't she keep her mouth shut? Was it such a humiliating situation to be left defenseless in front of him? His pride had been offended by her word and he had done the only thing he had ever done with her: be a foolish jerk to answer her mean foolishness. If they had been in politics, they would have started a war… Now was not the time to think, he needed to catch up with her, or at least to wait for her at her house.

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