Warning: Chapter includes alcohol and marijuana use. Everyone drinking/smoking is doing so of their own free will, so please keep that in mind. Lucy will not be participating in either.

*Chapter Thirty-Two: Merry Fucking Christmas- Part Four

(December 25th, 2017, Monday Night)

"Merry fucking Christmas!"

Gray tipped back the bottle, a burning liquid sliding down his throat. A lazy grin spread over his face before he passed the bottle to Erza, watching as she took a swig, her lips pressing to Jellal's a moment later.

Music played from Natsu's phone, the battery three quarters of the way full, ensuring them a few hours of playing time before it was drained. More bodies had joined the party, the gifts pushed to the side of the room, giving everyone the space they needed to dance or sit down, conversations about nothing and anything scattered around the room.

Lucy quietly hummed along to the song where she sat, her back pressed against the wall, looking up occasionally at Natsu and the other people smoking in the corner. A window was wide open, allowing smoke to filter out of the room.

Levy was with him, as well as two men Lucy had seen, but never spoken to. Jet and Droy, Levy had called them, both standing close enough to breathe the same air as the short woman.

Of course, that air was filled with smoke, from cigarettes and marijuana.

She watched as Levy passed a joint to her lanky friend before that man passed it to Natsu. He took it, inspecting it for a few seconds before shrugging, taking a hit. Lucy had to press her lips into a tight line to stop herself from laughing when Natsu started coughing, probably from taking too hard of a hit. He pounded his fist against his chest three times before clearing his throat, deciding to try again.

He past the joint to a man Lucy knew as Lyon, Gray's brother. She had seen him before, but always with longer white hair. He must have recently cut it, the sides shaved with just a few inches on the top. Lucy flushed when his eyes fell on her, raising a brow before rejoining his conversation with Natsu.

Lucy's chest constricted at being caught staring, so her eyes sought out others, distracting herself from the slight embarrassment. Cana, a woman named Ultear, and Yukino were playing cards, the losers of each hand having to take a shot of alcohol. From where she sat, Lucy saw Cana had a hand that would win, but she folded, probably to get another gulp of vodka.

Lucy wasn't drinking or smoking, and no one tried to make her change her mind. She was thankful for that, not wanting to deal with peer pressure on top of her usual anxiety. Watching the people around her have fun was enough for her, observing them as they let go of their problems and cut loose.

"Mind if we join you?" a man asked, Lucy's eyes snapping up to see Jellal and Erza.

Lucy felt a ripple of sickness through her body before she reminded herself there was nothing to worry about. While she didn't exactly trust them, Natsu was close by, and he wouldn't let anyone hurt her. Besides, she needed to get outside of her comfort zone every once and a while, and now seemed like a good time for that.

When she nodded, the couple sat in front of her, Jellal holding up a deck of cards with a familiar logo on the back. "Do you wanna play with us?"

Lucy bit her bottom lip, her voice small but firm. "Yeah." The idea of a game sounded fun, even if nervous energy kept thrumming through her system.

She adjusted herself while Jellal shuffled the cards, his eyes finding hers. "I assume you know the rules to UNO?"

"Yes," she said with a nod, her stomach bubbling with something she couldn't place, but it was light and a little scary. Lucy didn't cast it away, merely letting the feeling settle as the game began.

Everyone drew one card, revealing it to see who dealt. Erza had the highest number, so she gave everyone seven cards before turning one card over to start the discard pile. It was a green '6', which was lucky for Lucy considering half her cards were green. She organized hers by color then number before they began.

Jellal was to Erza's left, so he started, Lucy following after before it reached Erza again. The game started slow, a good moment passing between each turn until Lucy felt herself relaxing.

Her inner fears nearly ate her alive when she put down a green skip card, hoping she wouldn't take it personally when she said, "Skip, E-Erza."

Erza merely chuckled, eyes flitting up to Jellal since it was now his turn. When Lucy wasn't met with a hateful glare, she calmed down, realizing it was just a game. While she could see they all wanted to win, they were still being civil, not taking it seriously when someone had to something unfavorable in the game.

Jellal won the first round, but Lucy won the second. Her heart had hammered when she said, "Uno." Her hands would have been shaking, but she kept them tucked in her lap, her card already memorized. She was happy when she saw the color hadn't changed between her last turn and then, so she laid down her last card, winning the round.

They weren't keeping score, just playing for fun. For the third round, Gray and Rogue joined, Lucy scooting back to give them more room, even if it was only two or so inches. Her voice was low the entire time, but since she only had to say a few words at a time, she usually got them right without stammering.

The more rounds they played, the more Lucy felt her tension fading away. What they were doing right now, it was so normal it almost felt like a dream. Lucy even managed a small smile when she won again, barely beating Rogue who also had one card left.

"Great job," Gray said, laughing at Rogue's pout. He collected the cards, holding them towards Lucy. "Do you wanna shuffle now?"

Lucy's eyes zeroed in on the deck of cards before flashing to meet Gray's gaze, her body tightening as she admitted, "I'm, not good... at it."

"Oh," he started, his smile turning softer before he cut the deck. "Do you want me to teach you?"

"You don't, have to," she said, but he shook his head.

"It's cool. It doesn't take long anyways."

Gray held up the two stacks of cards. "Okay, so you're gonna take the deck, and make it about half like this. Then you're gonna curl your fingers around them, like this."

Lucy watched, studying his movements as if she might be tested later. Her own fingers twitched, wanting to make the same actions, but she kept them in her lap, terrified of making a fool out of herself.

"And then, you're gonna take your pointer fingers on the back of the decks, like this. With your thumb, you're gonna slowly pull up while your finger on the back pushes down. And hopefully—"

A few cards started falling from each pile, each one covering the other gracefully. "— only a few come down at a time until they're all done. And after that, you just push them together." Gray made the new deck nice and neat before cutting it again. "Then just repeat it until you feel it's good and shuffled. I mean, it's never gonna be perfect, but it's pretty good."

Gray looked up at Lucy's eyes, seeing the hesitance written on her face. He kept his soft tone, wanting her to see he meant her no harm. If she was going to be around, it was worth getting to know her. She was a functional member of Fairy Tail now, and he wanted her to know she didn't have to be so afraid.

Though, if she was, he couldn't blame her. He had come to realize he handled the earlier situation with Natsu almost dying poorly, but he couldn't take it away. He could only try to show Lucy he wasn't a bad guy.

"It might take a while 'til you get good at it. I remember it took me a long time. I bent so many cards." He chuckled, seeing Erza and Jellal nodding in agreement. "The more you practice, the better you'll get. When they're older cards you gotta be more careful. See, these are already kinda bending. Sometimes it helps shuffling them the opposite way to fix that, but still be careful."

Lucy slowly nodded, wanting him to know she was still listening. She hadn't said a word, merely observing and mentally taking notes.

Then Gray said something Lucy wasn't expecting, her eyes widening and heart racing when Gray held out the deck with a smile on his face. "You wanna try?"

Lucy immediately shook her head, not wanting that much attention on her. They must have misinterpreted the reason she said no, Erza speaking up to address an issue Lucy hadn't even thought of. "Don't worry if you bend the cards a bit. They're more durable than you think."

'What if I break their cards? They wouldn't forgive me.' Lucy swallowed thickly, ready to shake her head again before Gray set the deck in front of her.

"Just try once?"

Realizing she was creating more attention by refusing, Lucy grabbed the deck, wanting to get it over with. She parted the deck in half before curling her fingers around it like Gray had before, her brows furrowing as she tried getting the placement of her fingers just right.

Lucy tried mimicking what Gray just taught her, but she wasn't lucky enough to get it right the first time. Her cards came down in chucks, too much on her left before any of her right side came down. She wasn't shuffling as well as it should have been, but thankfully Gray had already shuffled before her attempt.

"That's good," Rogue said, trying to encourage her.

Lucy tried fighting the heat in her face, not wanting to blush from embarrassment. She could feel their eyes on her, and praise only made it worse. She didn't want anyone seeing her mess up. 'At least they're not making fun of me for it,' she thought, sliding the full deck of cards to the center of their odd circle, letting someone else take over.

Erza grabbed the cards, shuffling them herself while she spoke. "You did well. A little practice and you'll get even better."

Lucy's first impulse was to say 'doubt it', but she nodded instead, deciding she could practice alone in her room with the deck of cards Natsu had. It was half the size of the UNO deck, so maybe it would be easier to handle.

They played another two rounds before the group broke apart, some going to smoke while others wanted to drink. Lucy stayed where she was, her chest feeling light and bubbly from what just happened.

Despite her mind telling her negative things all night, she had fun playing cards with Natsu's friends. They were nice and patient with her, and that meant more than she could express. She wanted to thank them for spending time with her, but she didn't want to sound pathetic, so she kept her thoughts to herself.

"Hey, Lucy!"

She looked up, watching as Levy waved her over to another circle forming. "Come play with us!"

Lucy blinked, easily seeing the difference between normal Levy and high Levy. The girl's eyes were red, a huge crooked smile resting on her face. She couldn't sit still, her body swaying side to side, more to the right than the left. She beckoned Lucy to come closer, holding up some playing chips as she said, "Come play Coup!"

"Coup?" Lucy whispered, hesitantly getting up before crossing the room. Her decision was made easier when she saw Natsu in the circle, his back turned towards her as he sat crisscrossed. Unlike Levy, he remained perfectly still, even his breathing seemed calm.

Lucy found out why when she reached him, sitting next to the man. She looked up, surprised when she saw how red and unfocused his eyes were. He had a small smile on his face, his eyes hooded and body relaxed. Lucy had no doubts Natsu was as high as a kite. He looked zoned out yet oddly happy, part of Lucy wishing she had tried smoking too. She wanted to feel as calm as he looked, as carefree.

However, Lucy had seen enough of her friends get high to know not every high was the same, even when smoked or consumed from the same stuff.

Lucy wondered if Natsu had a body high or a head high, or perhaps a hybrid. She didn't ask, merely amused when he looked down at her, blinking slowly before his smile grew. "Hello."

Lucy didn't know if Natsu was trying to act normal or not, the man giving her a nod before looking forward, his shoulders shaking as he suppressed a laugh.

He was definitely high, and not fooling anyone.

Natsu turned his head, the action itself feeling laborious. Levy explained the rules to 'Coup', but she kept pronouncing it weird, leaving off the 'P' at the end. He blinked a few times before furrowing his brows, grabbing the top of the box the game came in before holding it up to Levy. "It's Coup. Like soup."

Levy paused, concentrating hard on what Natsu said before shaking her head. "No, it's pronounced koo. The p is silent."

Natsu twisted his lips, not liking that one bit. He held the box in his lap, grumbling louder than he meant to. "I'mma call it Coup with a p."

Lucy had a harder time keeping her laughter to herself at Natsu and Levy's pitiful argument. Not only that, Natsu acted more like a toddler that got his juice taken away when Levy corrected him again, that behavior growing worse when everyone else agreed with Levy, even Lucy.

"I feel so betrayed," he mumbled, his voice not matching his statement. Natsu sounded monotone, eyes in a daze as he licked his dry mouth, wishing he had some water with him.

"Do you know a cool dehydration test?" he asked, interrupting Levy as she explained the rules.

Lyon tried to stop him, but Natsu shrugged off the hand on his shoulder, holding up his hand. "No, it's really cool. You just pinch the skin on the back of your hand and see how fast it goes back to normal. If it doesn't go back to flat for like, I dunno, a while you're dehydrated, and if you—"

Natsu started pinched at his skin, quieting down from his new distraction. Lucy had to pinch her own arm to keep from smiling, finding Natsu ridiculous when high.

It probably didn't help that he had some alcohol too, even if it was just two shots of that whiskey he brought. He had asked Lucy if she wanted to drink or smoke before the party began, and when she said no, he told everyone not to offer anything to her. He wanted to respect her choice to stay sober, and even asked if she was okay if he had some alcohol or weed.

Lucy's heart still warmed when she thought of his consideration, knowing he was her closest friend there, and if he was intoxicated, it might make her feel uncomfortable. However, Lucy told him she didn't mind. It was a party after all, and if she felt uncomfortable, she could always go back to her room since it was right down the hall.

"Okay, does everyone understand?" Levy asked, breathing a little deeper to combat the high from taking over. She had a better tolerance than her friends since she had been smoking with Jet and Droy for a few months now on their days off, but she wasn't immune to its effects.

"I wasn't listening," Natsu admitted, finally dropping his hand, the skin on the back of it red from his incessant pinching.

"Me either," Lyon said, laughing when Natsu started laughing.

Levy rolled her eyes, fighting the urge to laugh herself as she looked over the rules again, explaining them the best she could. However, halfway through, a laughing spell hit her, her body shaking as she struggled to speak clearly.

"The Duke can... The Duke, he... he—" Tears welled in Levy's eyes as she gave up, covering her face in a feeble attempt to hide her high. "It's not even funny! Why... why can't I... stop... laughing!"

Thankfully Ultear and Gray came up, joining the game. She grabbed the rules, able to say them without trouble since she didn't have as much to drink. When the rules were said, the cards were passed out, everyone taking two chips from the pile to start the game.

It was essentially a game of 'bullshit' but with different elements. Lucy played her turns carefully, only taking one token while others tried to push their luck. She had a Captain and was entitled to steal two tokens from any player, but that was too much for her, so she didn't use her ability.

While she knew she wasn't lying, she knew others were. There were only three of each cards, yet four players claimed to be the Duke, taking three tokens during their turns. Lucy watched their faces carefully when they spoke, trying to figure out who was lying. She wasn't going to call anyone out on it, afraid of being wrong, but she was happy when people started shouting bullshit, revealing who was and wasn't lying.

Natsu had been one of those liars, losing one of his cards in the process. Instead of being upset, he only laughed, tiptoeing his card to the draw pile before putting it under the deck.

When it was finally Lucy's turn again, she swallowed hard, hoping she wouldn't meet much resistance when she made her move. She put three tokens into the pile, paying her dues. "I a... assassinate, Levy."

She picked an easy target, someone she felt wouldn't be mad at her for her decision. She was too scared to pick on anyone besides Natsu and Levy, the two being more understanding than most. If Yukino was playing, she might have picked her instead, but the girl was off somewhere behind her, drinking with Sting and Cana.

"Damn!" Levy's mouth parted, her teeth gnawing on her bottom lip as she looked Lucy in the eye, trying to see if she was lying or not. She groaned when she couldn't figure it out, discarding one of her cards without calling bullshit. "I'll let it go this time, but next time you better watch it Dragneel."

"Huh?" Natsu tilted his head back, his eyes narrowing at Levy. "What about me?"

"Not you, moron," Gray laughed, nodding towards Lucy. "The other Dragneel."

"Are they related?" Jet asked, eyes flitting between the two, seeing no similarities.

Lucy shook her head while Natsu glanced at her. "Nah, she just needed a name so she's borrowin' mine."

"You don't have a last name?" Jet looked her over, making her face feel warmer.

Lucy avoided all eye contact, head lowering as she started putting her guard back up. She didn't want to talk about herself, especially to someone she didn't know. Levy might have trusted him, but Lucy couldn't say the same.

"She does," Natsu said, grinning at Lucy before looking back at Jet. "We just told ya, it's Dragneel."

Before Jet could say anything else, Natsu looked over at Ultear, trying to get the attention off Lucy. "Your turn?"

Natsu didn't miss the way Lucy's shoulders relaxed when the game went on, Jet deciding to leave her alone. While Natsu's body wasn't cooperating with him much, his mind was mostly intact. It just took him a while longer to process things, but he was still mostly aware of his surroundings, even if sometimes he felt himself slipping, zoning out for periods of time.

He thought he kept passing out, but no one said anything about it, so he guessed he was imagining it. He had never been high before, always declining offers because he worried he might get addicted. Levy told him it wouldn't happen with marijuana, and while he was hesitant, he decided to try it at least once.

He had to admit, it felt pretty good but really fucking weird.

'I can't believe Magnolia legalized this for medical use... It's so trippy...'

It took about fifteen or twenty minutes before he started feeling it after he smoked, but once it started trickling into his system, it was all over. Natsu could feel his high, more aware of it than when he drank alcohol. He had to admit, his body didn't ache as much as it usually did, but at the same time, getting high didn't make him feel warmer on the inside like alcohol did.

He only took two shots, wanting to be buzzed but not drunk. He knew the alcohol would wear off faster than the marijuana, but he was okay with that as long as he didn't make anyone uncomfortable. He was mostly there, but sometimes his mind surrendered, letting whatever happened, happen.

Like now, as he dragged his hand over his face. He knew it was weird, but he couldn't stop himself, needing to rub over every inch before he was satisfied. It didn't make sense to Natsu, but he was okay with a little embarrassment, not minding acting like a fool as long as he had a good time.

"I coup Droy," Jet said, sliding seven tokens to the center pile.

Droy groaned before discarding his last influence, meaning he was out of the game. The game was going by relatively quick, and so far everyone had either one or no cards left. Lucy had lost a card when someone assassinated her, and since she didn't have a Contessa or the bravery to call bullshit, she discarded her non-assassin. She figured her Assassin was more valuable than her Captain.

A few turns passed before Lucy had three tokens, her heart racing as she slid them into the center pile. 'No turning back now,' she thought, eyes staying on her one face down card. She couldn't bring herself to look up, afraid he might be upset when she said, "I assassinate... Gray."

"What?" He gaped, looking down at his only card left. "Why not Natsu?"

"He's been out for two turns," Levy said, mock whispering in Droy's ear a second later. "He's not very observant, is he?"

That got the two laughing while Gray narrowed his eyes, weighing his options. "Well, I got nothing else to lose. I call bullshit."

Lucy's heart plummeted. She swore the blood drained from her arms yet made them feel heavier somehow. She took a deep breath, flipping over her card to reveal her Assassin.

"God damn!" Gray groaned just as Natsu burst into laughter.

"HA! In your face!" He grinned, peering down at Lucy as a blush worked its way on her face. He watched as she discarded her Assassin, grabbing a new card from the deck. Natsu leaned over, easily seeing it since she didn't try to hide it from him. She even tilted the card, allowing him a better look. He snickered as he looked back at everyone, a triumphant smile sliding on his face. "You guys are so fucked."

Lucy couldn't fight her smile, her head low to try to hide it. She didn't know what Natsu was talking about. She had a Duke, but that didn't mean she was going to win. That just meant she could get three tokens each turn, but if she didn't play well, she would still lose.

She wondered whose Duke she had. Whenever someone lost an influence card, they had to put it under the deck to be drawn later. She put her card face down, not needing it at the moment. It was Lyon's turn now, the man still laughing that Gray was out of the game.

Lyon played it safe, taking one token before his turn was over. Levy stole two from him, claiming she had a Captain. Lyon called bullshit, forcing Levy to reveal her card. It was a Contessa, something Levy could have used earlier when Lucy assassinated her.

Levy huffed before putting her last card in the pile, standing so she could take another hit by the window. Droy and Natsu joined her, the only people left playing being Lucy and Lyon while everyone else was watching.

Lucy swallowed before sitting up straight, taking three tokens from the center. "I take... three with my... Duke."

Lyon covered his mouth with a hand, his eyes glaring at her tokens as he thought, debating if he should call bullshit or not. There was a good chance she was lying, but there was also a chance she was telling the truth. Deciding to let it go, Lyon took a single token, letting Lucy take another turn.

That went on once more until Lucy had nine tokens, her options now limited. The rule stated a person couldn't have more than ten tokens, so she was forced to coup someone. Since the only person was Lyon, Lucy gathered her tokens, the man already knowing his fate.

"Good game," he said, smiling as he leaned in. He extended a hand towards her, Lucy's eyes widening at the gesture.

She took a shallow breath, hand slowly dropping her tokens before reaching out, accepting his hand shake. She was surprised by how cold his hand felt, thinking it was vastly different from Natsu's. "G-good... game," she whispered back, unsure if he could hear her.

He let go of her hand, helping Ultear pick up the remaining pieces before putting them back in the box. "I need a drink," he said, getting up to join the small group on the other side of the classroom. They were passing the bottle around, exchanging stories without a care in the world.

Lucy froze when Ultear gave her a pat on the back, the woman's eyes kind as she said, "Congrats." She joined her other brother by the window, talking to Gray without smoking what they were passing around.

Lucy took a few deep breaths, her skin warm with a flush as she kept reminding herself everything was okay. Nothing bad had happened, and if she hadn't gone through what she did at the lake house, she wouldn't have been reacting that way.

'It's okay. Everything fine. Just relax. You'll be okay. It's fine... It's fine.'

While Lucy wanted to retreat back to her original spot, she forced herself to stand, padding her way over to Natsu. He was leaning against the wall near the open window, a cigarette in his hand while he listened to Gray and Ultear's conversation.

Just as Lucy made it to Natsu's side, Lyon came up, snatching the joint from Jet's hand before taking a deep inhale. "Thanks," he said, passing it back.

Jet didn't look offended, but Lucy figured it was because he was too high to care. She kept herself close to Natsu, feeling safer near him. Her mind wasn't so loud when he was around, her guard once again softening as she allowed herself to relax. She knew she couldn't rely on him as a crutch forever, but she would cross that bridge later.

Ultear sighed heavily, drawing a few people's attention. She was looking out the window, frowning at the grass bathed in moonlight. "Another year with no snow."

"When was the last time it was a white Christmas anyways?" Gray asked, joining her. They didn't seem to mind the smoke passing by, sucked out the window by the wind.

"Two years ago?" Levy said, her eyes closed as she tilted her head back, enjoying the feeling thrumming through her body and mind. "Remember, we all built a snow woman."

"Not a snowman?" Jet asked, causing Levy to shake her head.

Levy held her hands up to cup over her breasts, then thrust them out a few inches. "Cana gave her huge boobs. Like, massive!" She giggled before giving her imaginary breasts a few squeezes. If Levy wasn't high, she wouldn't dream of doing such a thing, but in that moment, she didn't bother feeling anything but silliness.

"Didn't she cut some of Gildarts' hair and use it as a ponytail?" Natsu asked, eyes squinting as he smiled at the memory. Gildarts had been angry, but even he had to laugh at how silly it turned out. 'Wonder when Gildarts is getting back. Maybe I should ask Makarov if he knows anything.'

"He needed a haircut though," Gray said, running his hand through his short dark hair. "It was almost down to his ass."

"Were you looking?" Lyon teased, earning a punch to the shoulder from his brother.

Ultear rolled her eyes, her smile turning soft as she gazed at the ground, wishing there was snow. "Maybe it's a good thing it's not a white Christmas. People keep complaining about how cold it is."

Lucy wanted to ask why she made it sound like that was a ridiculous complaint, but she kept her lips sealed, listening as Natsu tried humming to the song playing in the distance. He was way off, going too slow to match up. She didn't mind, the sound soothing in an odd way.

"I think it's fine," Gray said, fingers unbuttoning his shirt.

Lucy widened her eyes, taking a half-step closer to Natsu, making their arms press against each other. He didn't seem to notice, merely humming along as he smoked his cigarette, his eyes remaining unfocused.

While Lucy tried to keep herself calm, Gray stripped out of his shirt, tossing it behind him as if he didn't need it in the first place. "Mom always loved the snow."

Ultear rested her elbow on the window sill, her cheek tucked into her open palm. She let out a long sigh, her smile never waning. "I hope she's happy wherever she is. There's probably snow there." Their mother loved the snow, preferring the colder months over the warmer ones.

Before Gray could agree, Lyon scoffed, causing both siblings to cast him a glance. His brows were pinched together, his nose wrinkled in disgust. "Mom is lying on our kitchen floor, and the only thing she's surrounded by is her own dried up blood."

Ultear was a strong woman, but even that made her stomach roll, picturing their mother's dead body perfectly in her head. A large gash parted her skull, her blood indeed covering the kitchen tiles. She saw it clearly because she was the one who put her there, cracking the bat over her mother's skull to save her own life. The image haunted her dreams every so often, reminding her she was the reason her mother was no longer with them.

She may have been a zombie, but she was still their mother, and Ultear killed her.

While Ultear was unable to say anything, Gray was, growling as he shoved Lyon's shoulder. "What gives?"

"What? She shouldn't fill her head with stupid delusions," Lyon shot back, his own hand grabbing at the hem of his shirt, ready to yank it off.

Lucy's stomach and heart dropped as she listened to the family fight, her body moving closer to the only person who made her feel safe in that room.

Natsu's chest tightened, not liking where the conversation was heading either. He seen it coming, experiencing a moment of clarity. Instead of saying anything, Natsu stayed out of it, knowing his place. He knew from experience it wasn't a good idea to jump into a family feud. It was better to wait it out and let them handle it on their own, even if he had his own opinions on the situation.

Natsu looked down when he finally registered a weight pressing against his arm. He saw Lucy seeking comfort, his brows furrowing before he looked back at the two men glaring at each other, one without a shirt and the other in the process of yanking his off.

Natsu narrowed his eyes before taking a long drag from his cigarette, wrapping an arm around Lucy's shoulders before tucking her under his arm to protect her. Not once did Natsu think she was in danger, but if she was that close to him, she was scared, and he would help if he could.

He was met with no resistance, the woman accepting his help without a second thought. If he wasn't worried about getting involved, he would tell Lyon and Gray to keep their clothes on, but he kept quiet, his eyes avoiding them as they hashed it out.

It wasn't his business. It wasn't his fight.

"I don't care what you think," Gray started, jabbing his finger into Lyon's chest. "But you can't talk to people like that. Especially not your fucking sister. Apologize."

"I'm not apologizing for shit. She's the one who should be sorry. She killed her!"

"She didn't kill anyone. You and I both know Ur was already dead. There was nothing anyone could do. Ultear only did what anyone would do in her situation. She survived."

"By killing mom."

"No, but saving herself and putting Ur out of her misery." Gray bared his teeth before shaking his head. "You think she would've wanted to be walking around without a mind of her own? No. Ultear did what she had to do, what you would've done if you were there."

"I wouldn't have killed her," Lyon urged, but Gray didn't buy it.

"Maybe that's why you wanted to be a runner, huh? Too afraid of doing what needs to be done?"

"No, I'm just not okay with senselessly killing people. Mom could've been fine in the house by herself until someone makes a damn cure for all this shit." Lyon swayed a little, fighting the urge to relax and let his mind rest. His high was trying to take over, but he was angry, forcing himself to stay in the moment instead of giving in.

"Are you even listening to yourself?" Gray asked, deflating. He was tired of having the same fight with Lyon, tired of bringing up the past. Their mom was dead, and as unfortunate as it was, it didn't mean they had to tear themselves up over it. He missed his mom too, but he also understood there was nothing that could be done. Ur had turned, and once turned, they had to be put down. Ultear had no choice, but Lyon refused to see it that way.

"Yeah, are you?" Lyon discarded his shirt, not backing down from the fight.

Gray shook his head, wishing his mind didn't feel like it was swimming. If they were sober, the fight would have ended already, but neither man was letting it go. He sighed, deciding logic was the only way to beat Lyon, even if he had to struggle to keep up with his own thoughts.

"Say we had kept her in her house. What then? Were you gonna stay behind and feed her? You know as well as I do those things don't eat regular food. They eat meat, specifically alive, bleeding meat. Now, what would you bring to her to keep her alive, granted her skin didn't rot off before this magical cure came about."

That in itself made Gray scoff. "There's no cure anyways. We're all on our own, and no one's gonna come save us. This... is... it."

Natsu swallowed as those words sunk in, his head falling as his body felt numb. He had no idea Gray felt that way, his ideas going against what Natsu thought. He still held out hope, waiting for the day everything got better, that the cure was made and they could go back to some semblance of normal.

Was there even a point in holding out hope, or was Gray right? Was no one coming? Were they all doomed to die a painful and meaningless death?

While Natsu's mind started spiraling into darkness, Lucy closed her eyes, wanting to escape the moment. She knew if she left the room, it would be over, but her feet wouldn't budge. Lucy stayed planted against Natsu, waiting for them to finish their fight.

Her stomach rolled when Gray said there was nothing coming, that they were all that was left. She didn't want to believe it, her head turning towards Natsu, resting her face on his chest. His heartbeat was surprisingly fast against her skin, the man's composure suggesting he wasn't affected by their yelling, but clearly he was reacting to it. That didn't make her feel better, wishing they would stop all the senseless fighting.

When Lyon didn't respond, only stared in shock, Gray took a deep breath before letting his shoulders sag. "Look, I know none of this is okay, and I understand you're hurting, but you can't keep taking mom's death out on Ultear."

At the mention of their sister's name, Lyon flinched, guilt entering his system. He clenched his jaw, fruitlessly wishing they were all back at home with their mom, alive and well. Deep down he knew. He knew it wasn't Ultear's fault, but that didn't stop the pain. He wanted someone to blame, and she was an easy target. She wore her guilt on her sleeve, and he saw it every time someone mentioned Ur or a mother in general. She was tearing herself up about it.

So why couldn't he just, stop?

All she had done was allowed herself a small moment of happiness, and his first instinct was to crush her spirit, to take her good mood and hack away at it with his cruel words.

Lyon raised a hand, Gray not jolting for a second. However, instead of punching Gray, Lyon covered his eyes, his head falling into his palm as the tears started forming. He didn't try to fight them, merely letting the emotions take over. And with it, his high came back strong, his mind trying to help him by letting him forget about his troubles, letting him forget about his pain.

"Mom wouldn't want us fighting," Gray said, seeing his words were finally getting to his brother. "Especially not today. So, can we just move on? At least for tonight until we can talk about it when we're not both fucked up?"

Despite being tipsy, Gray was keeping himself together. He wasn't slurring, but he felt the alcohol thrumming through his veins. He was just glad he didn't try smoking tonight. He couldn't imagine how the fight would have gone if he was out of it.

"Please?"

Lyon nodded, not taking his hand off his face for a moment. He wiped his tears, sniffling back snot before looking down. He grabbed his shirt, throwing it over his shoulder before turning. "I'm done partying," he said, making his way to the door.

Everyone's eyes were on him, even Lucy, who had finally peeked after she felt the storm was passing. She didn't budge away from Natsu, soaking in his comfort and warmth, her mind not bothering to think it was embarrassing or weird. She needed him, and he was there for her.

"Wait," Ultear said, her voice threatening to crack.

Lyon shook his head, stopping at the door before slowly opening it. His eyes found hers, then Gray's. He cleared his throat, heart heavy and bruised, tired from the constant abuse it was put through from his dark thoughts.

"I want to be alone," he said, eyes flitting to Cana before Levy's. "Thanks for letting me come. Sorry, about..." His voice cut off before he left, leaving an awkward tension behind. The music playing in the background didn't help, everyone feeling their own kind of uncomfortable.

"Well," Droy started after a moment, his eyes glued to the door. "That was..."

'Awkward,' Natsu thought, glad his mouth didn't say it. Or, at least he didn't think he said it. His mind held a heavy fog, the only thing keeping him grounded being the cold air brushing against his heated skin. He tried taking another drag of his cigarette, only to find disappointment when he realized it was burnt to the filter. He didn't think as he let it fall to the ground, crushing it under his foot to make sure he didn't accidentally start a fire.

He loved a good flame, but only when it was in a controlled environment.

Levy was the next one to break the silence, walking up to Ultear before wrapping her in a hug. The smaller woman's face smashed against Ultear's collarbone, the high making her forget about personal boundaries. "I'm so sorry he said those things to you," she mumbled into Ultear's skin, giving her the strongest hug she could muster, but Ultear barely felt it.

She barely felt anything, her body and mind numb from what just happened. She knew Lyon blamed her for their mother's death, but she didn't know it was eating away at him. Her eyes slid shut, wishing the world would just stop, but she wasn't that lucky.

"You know it's not your fault, right?" Gray asked, frowning when Ultear sucked in a shaky breath.

"I... should go talk to him," she whispered, shrugging Levy off her before taking a step forward.

Gray moved in front of her, shaking his head. "He said he wants to be alone. I think we should respect that."

When Ultear didn't look convinced, Gray added, "He just needs to cool off. Okay? He'll come around." He put his hand on her shoulder, giving it a squeeze. "Just let him sort this out on his own. He'll see he went too far." Lyon had never been that bad before, but Gray figured it was the marijuana affected him.

Ultear must have suspected that too, wrapping her arms around herself before whispering, "Maybe none of us should be partying."

Erza glanced at Jellal, holding out her hand for him to take. They had been sitting on the other side of the room when it happened, blissfully drinking the night away with Cana, Yukino, and Sting. Rogue had left moments before the fight ensued, saying he was going to spend some time with Minerva before bed.

He laced his fingers with hers, his eyes soft and smile sad. Jellal must have known she was wondering the same thing. She had been like the others, wanting a break from all the real world stuff, if only for one night. She didn't think anyone would get in a fight, and she had been too stunned to stop it. Then again, even if she wasn't, she probably wouldn't have stepped in.

That was their battle, something she couldn't fix.

Gray's lips twisted before he cocked his head, eyes fixed on his sister's. "Why? I think we're all having a good time. Yeah, Lyon might've had too much, but that doesn't mean the party has to end."

Ultear sighed, her heart weighing heavy. "I just feel weird, celebrating while he's all by himself."

"He wanted that," Gray reminded her, hearing Lyon's words himself. "Besides, I think talking to him now is just gonna make it worse."

"I don't know..."

Gray frowned, his shoulders going slack. He knew how much Ultear was beating herself up about their mother, but he didn't blame her. Sure, he was sad Ur was dead, but there was nothing, absolutely nothing Ultear could have done about that. The damage was done, and Ultear could have either survived or died in a fruitless attempt to preserve their mother, something he didn't think Ur would want anyway.

"Do you wanna go for a walk or something? Get some fresh air?"

Ultear shook her head, her voice small. "No."

Gray removed his hand from her shoulder, hands dipping into his pockets on his jeans to keep from taking them off. He stripped when he was experiencing strong emotions, and he knew taking his clothes off now was only going to make matters worse. "What would take your mind off it?"

"Honestly?" Ultear took a deep breath before letting out a defeated sigh. "More alcohol."

Before Gray could suggest something else, Cana raised the bottle in her hand, her voice resounding in the classroom. "I hear that!"

Ultear blinked, eyes blown wide when she looked around the room, finally remembering there were other people. Her face paled, humiliation seeping into her brain. "Sorry," she mumbled, but mostly everyone shook their heads.

"We get it," Yukino said, giving the woman a weak smile. "Family doesn't always get along."

While that may be true, what just happened was far deeper than a normal tiff between siblings, but Lucy wasn't going to say anything. Her lips were sealed, body still pressed against her roommate's.

"Should we keep the party going?" Levy asked, struggling to put her hair up in a ponytail. She settled for a messy bun, her hands not cooperating with her mind. She wanted to stay up later, but if her friends wanted to call it quits, she would respect that.

"I think that's a good idea," Gray said, offering Ultear a smile. "We're not really celebrating anyways. We're just hanging out, having a good time. There's no harm in that."

Ultear wanted to disagree, but she knew Lyon didn't want to talk to her for a while. Their relationship hadn't been the same since the first day of the outbreak when he found her hunched over their mother's body, crying about what she had to do. She understood why Lyon didn't look at her the same anymore. It didn't help that Ultear looked like the spitting image of their mom, her being Ur's only biological child.

She could barely look herself in the mirror, afraid to see her mother's face staring back.

"I need a drink," Ultear said with a sigh, walking over to Cana who willingly handed her the bottle, letting her drown her sorrows.

"Does anyone wanna play a game?" Cana asked, looking around the room. She wanted to save the party, unsure when they would all get together again.

"Got any suggestions?" Jet asked, hand resting on Levy's shoulder blade to guide her towards the brunette.

Cana shook her head, looking around for any ideas. Her eyes settled on Erza, causing the woman to shrug. "It's been forever since we played never have I ever."

"Anyone wanna play that?"

"I'll play," Gray said, earning a grin from one of their hosts.

"Alright, that's the spirit."

"We're in too." Jellal and Erza shifted, opening their circle for more people to join. Erza had to move Happy, who was napping on the sleeping bags. She put him in her lap, the cat settling into the new position without much struggles.

Mostly everyone joined the circle, but there were a few stragglers, Natsu and Lucy being some of them. Upon seeing the fight was officially over, Lucy relaxed, pulling away from Natsu. Her heart felt upside down as her stomach rolled, unsure what she was feeling. She looked up, knowing one thing. She was glad Natsu was there to help her, easing her concern.

"Thanks..." she whispered, causing Natsu to meet her gaze.

He offered her a soft, warm smile. His eyes were hooded and red, but she could still see that deep green underneath. Natsu let his hand drop, fingers brushing against Lucy's back as he whispered, speaking from the heart. "Anytime."

Lucy swallowed thickly, wondering why she felt the urge to shiver. She chalked it up to being cold, the window still wide open, letting the outside air in.

Natsu dipped down, grabbing his smashed cigarette butt before pocketing it to throw away later. His eyes flitted over Lucy's face, trying to guess what she was thinking without much luck. He blinked slowly, feeling something strange crawling inside him, letting him know he was close to zoning out again. He would have welcomed it if not for Lucy being there, wanting to make sure she was okay after witnessing that fight.

"Did that... bring back memories of," Natsu mumbled, feeling pressure at his forehead. "With Gray, and yelling."

'Did that make sense? I hope so.'

Lucy understood what he meant, shaking her head to ease his worries. "No, just, still upsetting." She didn't like fights, whether she was witnessing them, hearing about them, or in them. The fight Gray had with his brother made her feel powerless, like there was nothing she could do to stop it without angering either one of them.

Luckily it was over, the dust settling. She took a quick breath, shoving her hands into the hoodie pocket before jolting, hearing her name being called from across the room.

"Lucy! Natsu! You guys gonna join us?"

She didn't have to look over to recognize Levy's voice, but she did give the girl a glance so she knew she heard her. Lucy's eyes found Natsu's when he spoke, seeing him struggle with basic sentences, like he was distracted or confused.

Truthfully, Natsu's mind was messing with him. His high came on in waves, bringing him in and out of clarity. He felt himself slipping, wondering how long it would be until he was self-aware again. Part of him was always there, it just changed how in control he was of that part.

"Do you, what do you say?" he asked, taking a few deep breaths in a feeble attempt to regain control. It was useless, his mind surrendering soon enough to the high. "Wanna play?"

"Sure," Lucy whispered, feeling oddly safe and secure. She had felt upset, and he had comforted her, made her feel okay again. With Natsu by her side, she didn't think anything could bring her down.

If only she had been right.

.

.

.

Let me know what you thought of Lyon's character here. Before saying Lyon was being out of character, remember Lyon blamed Gray for Ur's death in the manga even though it wasn't his fault. Sure, it had to do with him, but he didn't actually kill her, she made a choice. In this story, Ultear didn't really kill Ur since she was already a zombie, but she did end her to save her own life. Lyon can't let go of the pain of losing their mother, and he's taking it out on the only person he can, his sister. He needs time to heal from his pain, just like everyone else. Lucy isn't the only one hurting in this story, and she isn't the only one who needs help. Hope that clears up why I wrote Lyon this way. It would be too easy if everyone was well-adjusted and got along great.

Anyone ever been around a couple or family fighting and you can't do anything about it? Jumping in will surely make it worse, but you don't know if you should walk away or just pretend like you don't hear it? It's a very awkward and uncomfortable situation.

If you haven't yet, I suggest playing Coup. It's really fun. :) Anyone like Lucy playing card games with other people besides just Natsu? She needs to start opening up to them, or at least start becoming friends with them, and I think that was a great first step for her. What do you think?

I have consumed and smoked marijuana before. The first time I smoked was in Colorado (where it's legal for recreational use) in June 2018. I've gotten high five times (so far), and every time it was a different experience. I like edibles way more than smoking, mainly because they're easier to consume and don't leave a strong odor, but smoking made me feel it a lot faster. My strangest high was when I mixed drinking with edibles. Every time I felt like I was coming down from my high, the alcohol took over and I felt drunk, only to go back to feeling high. It was... strange, but fun. I don't recommend trying it unless you absolutely want to and aren't being pressured into doing it, and you're over 21 years old. My first time trying marijuana was when I was 26 years old. It's currently legal medically in my state, but not recreationally, which was why I waited until going to Colorado to try it for the first time. I'm writing Natsu's high based on when I drank and consumed because it was such a crazy experience. I didn't do anything crazy, I didn't act crazy, but the feeling itself was so indescribable, but I hope I did a decent job writing a high Natsu. There won't be a lot of drug use in this story, but it will be brought up from time to time, and it will always have a warning in the beginning of the chapter if the characters use it. Sorry if anyone was uncomfortable with it being mentioned, but I gave a warning in chapter one saying it was one of the things included.

Thank you so much for every favorite, follow, and review! I truly appreciate it. Like, it makes my fucking day when I get a review saying what you like about my story or even getting some constructive criticism to become a better writer. When things become overwhelming in real life, fanfiction has helped me so much. Whether it's writing or reading, I love escaping and peeking in on a different world. I hope you've enjoyed this story so far. I have so many plans for it that it's hard to keep track of all of them. Thank you for reading and supporting me! Also, shout out to those incredible people who gave me feedback last time: WhatAnimeHasTaughtMe, hiii guys, stranger1999, Mandapandaa, cOokIe-MOnzTa, mumof4, Animeforlife1412, ThaDesperado64, shootingstarssel, isabelangelica. guerraallemant, Supergirl20155, AlycePixi, beckstheunicorn, Lodemai04, valerioux, Nightside14, onestop, Lady Of The Sphinx, Gigi-San28, Flash805, TheUniqueFangirl, Terra of Life, MnMAllyn, Lizxcliff11, itsxoi, Guest, deboome, crazi4muzik, An Amber Pen, Tohka123, FlameDragonHime, positive vibes only, ElementalMiko12, Sam, Duchixx, LiviFanfics27, BB-Salamander(x2), WriterzBlock12, firelover11(x2), Amaimiss, Chikachoo, TurboWolf, kuro02, Lucy Dragneel, and Oli!

Up next, Chapter Thirty-Three: Never have I ever