Chapter 7
"It's not going to work."
"He won't be fooled at all."
"Oh, he'll swallow the bait just fine" said Westley, countering Fezzik and Inigo. "I know the man better than both of you. It's true that he won't put himself in great danger when he can avoid it. But look around you" he said as he turned around and swept his arm around the whole deck of the Revenge, "and tell me this looks dangerous. Remember what she used to look like."
Inigo compared the Revenge's appearance to her old self. Greta and her crew had done wonders with the sails. All were now trimmed in a bright red lacy border, with a large sun as the central design on the largest sails. It looked nothing like a pirate ship; rather, it had a look that could have been from a land far away. On the main deck stood a tent adorned in similar colors with a small sun-adorned flag atop fluttering in the breeze. Although there was no time to paint the whole ship, much of the important trim had been spruced up and only the best ropes, barrels and tools remained above deck. Two polished cannons were pointed toward the center of the ship, and colorful ribbons brightened other areas.
"No," Westley continued "he'll believe it because he WANTS to believe it. He may be a bit paranoid about other kingdoms, but the idea that a mysterious land south of the great sea has heard of the great Florin will be more than he can stand and he'll simply have to find out more for himself. No my friends, the trick will be getting him to stay on the ship for our plan to work. I think he'll at least want to step foot on her, but we need to convince him to stay onboard. We'll have to work on his pride or vanity, whichever will work. I think it best if Fezzik and I go into the cabin before we're spotted; with no accent and your hair cut shorter he won't recognize you, Inigo. We'll leave the door open a crack and be within earshot, but to communicate anything we'll have to use a crew member as a go-between. Remember to use your new limp Inigo, and please remember to call the ship the Intrepid. I don't think we can get out of this thing alive if they figure it out while we're still at anchor. Contessa, your beard is slipping a little."
Contessa checked her fake facial hair, smearing the gum and pressing it tightly on again. Fezzik put a mighty hand on Inigo's shoulder. "Be careful Inigo. If Humperdinck discovers your identity, he'll have you killed. Rest assured he will die at my hands shortly after."
"Thank you my friend" answered Inigo patting Fezzik on the chest. "But if it's all the same to you I'd rather all of us come out of this alive." Fezzik followed Westley through the door and out of sight. "Okay everyone" announced Inigo loudly to everyone on deck, "the performance begins. What land are we from?"
"SOLARUS!" yelled the crew.
"What language do you speak?"
"SOLARIAN!"
"That's right! So shut up when the king is here; if you have to talk, say only a few words in a funny accent and use your hands a lot. It's showtime!"
And Westley was right, after the Intrepid nee Revenge anchored offshore of Florin's harbor and sent a boat out announcing themselves and bearing gifts, Humperdinck and an honor guard returned to take a look at the visiting ship and meet her captain.
"Your Majesty" Inigo said with a bow, "welcome to our humble ship from Solarus. I am Captain D'Vough. It is most gracious for you to visit our humble vessel. I wish that we could invite you below deck, but I'm afraid some of our food spoiled and the hold hasn't aired out yet. Please accept our best hospitality on deck today. Would his Majesty care to get out of the sun?" asked Inigo as he waved toward the tent.
"No, it is quite nice today. I'm afraid affairs of state don't allow me as much time outside as I would like." Humperdinck heard a chattering and looked up in the rigging to see a monkey. As he did so his crown fell off the back of his head and was barely caught by one of the guards. "My father had a large head and his crown was sized accordingly. My everyday crown fits better but I left it back in the castle; in all honesty it's rather plain in comparison." Inigo nodded and explained that the ship had a monkey mascot of sorts by the name of Bosen. Humperdinck then eyed the cannons. "Are those ornamental?"
"No your Majesty," replied Inigo "but as your eye can tell they haven't been used in some time. With our travels and items of trade we can't be too careful. Fortunately we have the fastest ship on the water and can outrun any ship we face."
"Actually Captain, you have the fifth fastest. Florin has the four fastest ships on the water" Humperdinck boasted.
Inigo knew that Florin really only had two ships of any speed, and both were slower than the Revenge. Any other ships in the so-called 'fleet' were really just fishing boats or transports. "Your Majesty will excuse my claim, for I do not been to overly boast; not only is this ship the fastest but I must lay some of the credit on the crew. Their skills at sailing are a thing to behold." During the conversation the crew had busied themselves with menial chores while grunting or spouting gibberish at each other and of course waving their hands a lot. While coming on board, the king had snagged his leather boot on a nail in the deck tearing the boot's heal slightly. A crewmember had rushed in quickly and hammered the nail down and uttered "Solar prestige a gammon" before skittering off again.
"Your confidence in your abilities is admirable, but I'm afraid a bit mislaid" Humperdinck said as he thought quickly. If he could humble this ship they might be willing to become an ally against the local kingdoms. If they were actually better then perhaps something could be learned of their techniques and an excuse found for a possible bad showing. "I propose a race. No doubt you saw the rock formation offshore on your way in. From the docks, first around Gateway Rock and back to the dock is the winner."
"A race, your Majesty?" Inigo asked as he feigned surprise. "Might I suggest a wager? The loser must supply the meal tonight at a banquet in your city." Humperdinck's face started to grimace. "Don't worry. Only a small portion of our food spoiled. There will be plenty to arrange some courses I'm sure the royal palate hasn't tasted before. To show our good faith, allow me to present your Majesty with an additional gift so rare I suspect no one in this land has seen one before." Inigo gestured for a crew member to hurry and retrieve the object. Humperdinck luckily happened to be looking in the opposite direction when the pair of Westley's arms reached out from the opened door and handed a cloth-wrapped bundle to the crew member, who rushed it back to Inigo.
Inigo unwrapped the bundle. "Your Majesty, I present to you a Chinese puzzle box. Within its many slides, blocks and pins is a secret chamber that rewards the person clever enough to solve it. Each one is handcrafted and no two are exactly alike. This one may be hundreds of years old." He handed the wooden box to Humperdinck, who tried unsuccessfully to shift the first few pieces.
"I've never seen its like. I shall enjoy solving it later."
Inigo looked around conspiratorially and motioned the king closer. In a low voice he said "It would be understandable if your Majesty's fastest ship was indisposed and we had to race a slower vessel. A loss would not rule out Florin as having the fastest ship." Inigo straightened up and smiled slightly at the king. After a moment Humperdinck returned the smile and nodded ever so slightly.
He turned to Tu. "Take this back carefully and give it to the Court Counselor to study. Give orders to set up the great hall for a banquet tonight; menu to be announced shortly. In the meantime have the Zephyr brought to race immediately." Tu started to object, but Humperdinck dismissed him, leaving two junior guards with the king. He then turned back to Inigo and lied in a voice loud enough to be heard by everyone. "All my ships are ready at a moment's notice except for my fastest ship the Boreas; unfortunately she is in port having her barnacles rotated and isn't able to sail at this hour. No matter, the Zephyr should be fast enough."
"It may not be fast enough, your Majesty" bragged Inigo as he paced with his practiced limp, "my crew members know a few tricks to squeeze the most out of the smallest wind. Perhaps you have a trusted person who you would like to observe? I'm sure it would be most instructive." Inigo held his breath; this was the critical point that decided the next course of action.
"I do indeed. I myself shall ride along. I shall enjoy watching the stern of the Zephyr from over your bow." Humperdinck smiled inwardly. And if it should happen that this ship wins, he thought, I shall claim they cheated due to unsportsmanlike conduct and still claim victory for Florin.
And so it was. Both ships lined up and unfurled sails at the blare of the trumpet from the castle's wall. Humperdinck's joy grew greater as the Zephyr slowly pulled a full length ahead. The situation would have been different had Inigo not already given orders to hold back and let the other ship lead. In this position the Zephyr soon came abreast of the rock and started its sweeping turn around the stony formation. Just as it started to disappear briefly behind the rock, Inigo gave the signal. "Full speed! Tourbows out. Come about southeast; give it all she's got!" Humperdinck was stunned, not knowing what was happening. Previously unseen booms extended out of the bow and small additional sails deployed. The ship also turned AWAY from the rock and headed toward the open sea. The speed of the ship picked up dramatically and the coast started to shrink behind. Inigo turned to Humperdinck and asked "Would someone bring His Majesty a chair? He looks a little unsteady right now. I'm afraid the Zephyr is definitely going to beat us back to port." Humperdinck sank down into the offered chair. His guards, now with armed crew behind them, were offered no such luxury.
Having finally finished what he was working on in his room, Andy made his way out into the main entrance of the castle just in time to hear the trumpet at the start of the race. He made his way to the wall and asked a lookout what was going on. He watched the ships on the first leg of the race, the Zephyr's turn around the rock, and from his vantage point the Revenge peeling off in the other direction. The confusion became concern and then panic as he realized something wasn't right; furthermore, the crew on the Zephyr were blocked for some time from the view by the rock. As they raced back into the port, the crew was only then discovering that something was amiss and their celebration at the victory was quickly doused. With a great effort they brought the ship around, but by then the Revenge was a dot on the horizon. They gave chase for a short distance but the dot disappeared and they gave up, returned to port dejected and to wait for orders.
Back in the castle, Andy returned to the throne room to pace while he thought. Shortly Tu arrived and was surprised to see him there. "I thought you might still be in your room. Something has happened and I fear it is a bad thing." Tu briefed him on the happenings and conversation before the race. "The captain of the Intrepid gave the King this puzzle box as a gift which his Majesty then asked for me to give to you for study." Tu handed Andy the puzzle box.
"How fitting, since I am puzzled as to what happened. We can hope they are just showing off their skills to the King, but I feel something deeper is behind it. See if your men can find out anything else while I take this box back and study it. I hope it will yield a clue."