So this chapter is a little different.
For this chapter I really wanted to try and get more of an outsider's view. It seems to me because that, for most of us, our lives are probably more like those of the Capitol citizens, than the Districts. Therefore, it seemed important to get a Capitol perspective, so many of the things that might seem strange from a District perspective, are part of normal life here. I'm hoping that Aurelia comes across more as someone we can understand and relate to, and as someone rather naïve to the horrors her world is built on.
"Old or young, lovely or plain, rich or very rich, he'll keep them company and take their extravagant gifts, but he never stays, and once he's gone he never comes back." – Catching Fire, Chapter 15
AURELIA (1)
Aurelia Brightscape, aged 18. The Capitol
It all happens, as most things seem to happen in Aurelia's life, because of Cordelia. Well, actually in this case, technically speaking, it all happens because of Cordelia's new boyfriend.
"Tiberius Summervile," she'd gushed the first time she'd told Aurelia about it. "Can you believe it, Rey? Tiberius Summerville wants me to be his date to his show next week."
Aurelia could well believe it considering they had been spending the best part of several weeks together leading up to this moment. To be honest, she wasn't sure why Cordelia was all that surprised. She probably wasn't. All this gushing was probably just Cordelia boasting about the fact that she was dating a minor celebrity.
Well, minor celebrity is stretching it. In Cordelia's circles, her friends from fashion school, Tiberius Summerville is somewhat of a superstar, an up-and-coming stylist who is expected to make it all the way to Hunger Games fashion. (His dark eyes and floppy hair probably don't help in this aspect either). To the general population however, his is a name that might occasionally appear at a fashion show, and outside of that is more or less unrecognisable.
Still, Aurelia is happy for her older sister. Or at least she was for the first few weeks. After several months of hearing Cordelia talk about 'Tib this' and 'Tib that' it starts to get a little grating. There are only so many times she can listen to tales of how funny Tiberius is, or how good looking, or how clever and creative. She has only ever met Tiberius once, when he'd come to the house to pick up her sister, but Aurelia's impression of him then was that he was a bit too stuck up on his apparent genius. In fact, Aurelia is quite content to ignore his existence entirely (as much as that is possible when Cordelia won't shut up about him).
That is, until the day he lands the jackpot.
Aurelia walks into the kitchen one day and finds her sister like this:
"Oh my God, Aurelia! Oh my God, oh my God, oh my God!" She's squealing, phone still clutched in her palm. She looks like she's about to burst, so Aurelia feels duty bound to ask her what she's making so much noise about.
"Oh my God, Aurelia," she gasps once more. "Finnick Odair is going to model in Tib's show! Finnick Odair!"
Finnick Odair. Wow. Now he's a proper celebrity.
The truth is Finnick Odair held somewhat of a special place in Aurelia Brightscape's adolescent heart. She was fifteen when he won his Hunger Games, and at that age her heart was full of all sorts of romantic notions that she would now fervently deny if asked.
Practically everyone at her Capitol girl's private school had been obsessed with Finnick Odair that year in the way that teenage girls do best. Suddenly everyone was wearing trident jewellery and dying their hair bronze and covering their bags in little 'Four' badges. The most well-connected girls managed to get tickets to be in the audience at one of his interviews. Others hung around outside the tribute centre trying to get a glimpse of him. Her friend Camilla had bragged to anyone would listen that her family were going to District Four on holiday that summer and that she was going to meet Finnick Odair and make him fall in love with her. Aurelia had even had a shell bracelet that year, like Finnick's tribute token, that she wore on her wrist every day until the string frayed.
But Aurelia is eighteen now, and the teenage crush she'd had on Finnick has since faded, removing the rose-tinted lens she'd used to view him through. Finnick Odair is attractive, physically. You'd have to been blind not to see that. However, he's not the person she'd used to daydream about. He's just another too rich, too pretty, boy. Every time he's in the Capitol the tabloid holos carry a new story of his wild partying, his extravagant clothing, his numerous sexual exploits. He's a figure that introverted, homebody Aurelia struggles to connect with.
Even so. Finnick Odair. Wow.
Cordelia sees it in her face.
"Do you want to come?"
XXX
The fashion show is exciting. Aurelia's doesn't know much about Capitol high fashion, unlike her sister, but she appreciates the bright colours and symmetrical faces and glitz and glamour of it all. There are a few celebrities in the crowd: a famous singer, several soap actors and a holo , Aurelia feels very important as they take seats on the very front row that Tiberius had managed to procure for them.
Nothing happens for quite a while. Cordelia seems unphased.
"Fashion shows always run late, Rey." She says in the sort of casual demeanour that makes it seem as though she's been to a million shows like this, although Aurelia knows the closest experience she's had to this is her fashion college's end of semester event.
When it does finally start, Cordelia takes out a little holo pad and starts taking little notes. Aurelia watches the models. There seems to be a bit of a theme going on- they all have tight curls coiffed to the top of their heads. Most of them also seem to have been doused with a fair bit of golden hair spray. Many of them also seem to be wearing the most outrageous boots that Aurelia has seen on a real-life person. Thick platform heels, shiny leathery material, often covered in multiple silver studs and gems. Aurelia is quite jealous really. She would love a killer pair of boots like that. (Maybe Cordelia could get some off Tiberius?)
Still, most of the show she spends waiting. Every time a new model appears she looks for Finnick Odair, but it's not him. It's another tall, skinny coiffed model wearing outlandish boots. Still she's knows he's coming. Everyone knows. There's a certain tension in the crowd although they're trying to play cool about it.
Another model appears. It's not him.
Until it is.
As an androgynous looking model wearing very little apart from their thigh high killer boots disappears backstage, suddenly it's him walking down the catwalk. His curls have been coiffed just as tightly, and there's a hint of gold at the highest point, although his hair is pretty much golden in colour anyway. Tiberius has dressed him in a beige, angular looking jacket that lies open across his tanned chest. On his bottom half he's wearing what seems to be a black jumpsuit, heavily covered in zips, folded down at his waist. At his neck, a thick silver chain with multiple hanging medallions is casually draped, and on his feet are off course a pair of wicked black leather platform boots. It's a bizarre combination but somehow it works.
Aurelia feels, rather than hears, the photographer's cameras pick up their pace as Finnick makes his way down the centre of the room. Cordelia has latched onto her arm, her long fingernails digging in painfully, as she tries to contain her excitement.
He's right in front of them when he stops and turns. So close that Aurelia could reach out and touch him if she wanted. If she could dislodge the death grip her sister has on her arm.
He doesn't look at them. He keeps his gaze fixed high and distant. Aurelia thinks he's not seeing any of it.
XXX
At the end of the show Tiberius appears and is immediately swarmed by people and cameras. Cordelia decides she wants to try and fight her way through the crowd to be with him. Aurelia suspects she's just hoping to get her photo on the holonet. Aurelia however has no interest in the crowds of people, and no interest in the afterparty Cordelia is talking about, so she tells her she'll meet her back at home. Cordelia hands her the car keys and waves her off happily, already heading off in the direction of Tiberius, so Aurelia tries to work out in which direction she needs to go to escape. It's a big building and she's not entirely sure which door they entered through, so after several laps of the room she decides to just pick a door and see where it leads her.
Nowhere, it turns out. The door leads to a dimly lit staircase that, judging from its bare concrete walls, is only intended for staff to use. Aurelia is just trying to decide whether she turn around and try another door, or see where these steps lead when she realises she's not alone. He's half a flight of stairs up from her, leaning against a wall and looking miserably down a phone clutched in his palm.
It's Finnick Odair.
He doesn't seem to have bothered touching his hair which is still coiffed up, but he has changed into a simpler outfit- soft knitted jumper and dark grey trousers. He notices her at about the same time she sees him, and his expression visibly sours.
"What do you want?" he says. His accent is the first thing that strikes her. It's much stronger here than Aurelia has ever heard him use before in an interview and for a moment she lets her brain get distracted by it. A moment too long. She can see the annoyance building in his face and forces herself to find an answer.
"I don't- nothing. I don't want anything." She pulls the words out of her mouth uncomfortably. It's really him. Wow. This doesn't feel real. She feels disconnected from this moment. Wow. She's talking to Finnick Odair.
Finnick Odair snorts at her response. He's tapping at the phone in his hand.
"Everyone wants something from me," he says, still looking down at the phone.
"I was just trying to find the way out," Aurelia tries to say, but Finnick Odair's not listening. He's talking over her.
"Tonight's my night off, OK? I'm not having sex with anybody."
What?
She must say it out loud because suddenly he's looking up at her, and Aurelia can see he's trying to backtrack their conversation. Or rather his rant.
"I'm sorry," he says after a moment. "Forget I said anything." His face is just as beautiful as ever, but there's something in the set of his shoulders and the desperate tapping of his fingers against his phone that seems off. And, of course, the fact that he's standing alone in a dark stairwell.
"Are you alright?" she asks, which seems to both amuse and irritate him again.
"Can't get a phone signal," he says simply.
"You can borrow mine if you need to call somebody?" she offers tentatively. She doesn't want to make him angry again, but she isn't sure what will set him off.
"Why?" he asks. It's a strange response, and Aurelia is not really sure what he means. This whole interaction has been very odd to tell the truth.
"Don't you need to call someone?" She feels stupid even asking the question. Of course he does. That's why he's upset he can't get a phone signal. But what else is he expecting her to say?
"So I can just borrow your phone?" Finnick asks frowning.
Yes. Wow. What is so difficult about this. Aurelia is starting to feel a bit annoyed, which is something she never thought she'd feel if she ever met a celebrity.
"You don't have to." She's trying to work out how she can escape from this awkward interaction now. Would it be really weird if she just left now, back through the door she came through? Surely not any weirder than this conversation. Then at least she would be away from here and its not like she would ever meet Finnick Odair again.
She's just stealing herself to do it when Finnick speaks again.
"Sorry. I guess I'm just a bit suspicious of people. If I could borrow your phone that would be amazing." He actually attempts a smile then, but it doesn't reach his eyes.
"Sure," Aurelia says, digging around in her coat pocket. Finnick comes down the stairs towards her, until they're standing level. He's so close. Aurelia is starting to feel a little starstruck again.
She unlocks her phone and hands it over to him.
He obviously feels like he owes her some more explanation, so he keeps talking.
"A car was supposed to pick me up after the party later, but I don't think I can face it.I just want to call them to send a car now instead."
Well that's something Aurelia can relate to.
"Yeah, I'm actually trying to escape that party as well. If I can work out how to get out of here."
"Oh yeah?" Finnick's smile looks more natural now. She's amusing him again. "Not a big partier?"
"Definitely not. I'd much rather be at home watching 'The Way of the Sorcerer'," she laughs. Then she blushes. Why did she have to say that to Finnick Odair? Now he's going to think she's such a dork.
But to her surprise Finnick just frowns curiously, and asks, "What's that?"
So she finds herself telling him all about her favourite holo show, probably going into far more detail than he really wanted. He doesn't interrupt her though. He actually asks questions and seems genuinely interested.
"You should watch it," she says.
"Yeah. Maybe I will," he smiles. Then he finally excuses himself to make the phone call.
XXX
Holophone Message
To: Aurelia Brightscape
From: Unknown
Does Nellie die?
Holophone Message
To: Unknown
From: Aurelia Brightscape
Who is this?
Holophone Message
To: Aurelia Brightscape
From: Unknown
It's Finnick. Does Nellie die, because I'm going to need to buy a load of chocolate if she does?
Holophone Message
To: Finnick Odair
From: Aurelia Brightscape
I'm not going to tell you. You'll just have to watch and find out.
Holophone Message
To: Aurelia Brightscape
From: Finnick Odair
That's not helpful.
Holophone Message
To: Finnick Odair
From: Aurelia Brightscape
Get the chocolate anyway then you're prepared either way. You can never have too much chocolate.
Holophone Message
To: Aurelia Brightscape
From: Finnick Odair
I think my stylists would beg to differ.
XXX
She had thought that would be all she ever heard of Finnick Odair, excluding the news of course. His face still regularly popped up on gossip new channels regularly, whenever he was in the Capitol which seemed to be multiple times a year.
And then one day he suddenly starts messaging her. And not just messaging her- messaging her about 'The Way of the Sorcerer'. Wow. It's been a while since she had something to geek out with over that holo show. She never thought she would be able to geek out with Finnick Odair.
Through his messages, Aurelia begins to build up a different picture of who Finnick Odair is. Of course, he's just as funny and charismatic as he is on the holonet, but instead of the flirtatious charm he seems to deploy exclusively in interviews, she's finding that his sense of humour is much more sarcastic and self-deprecating.
She gives him more suggestions of holo shows to watch, and they discuss those too. He seems to like any ridiculous fantasy shows with copious amounts of magic and quests the best. He does like to laugh about Capitol reality holo dramas, although he says it hits a bit close to home. Aurelia realises he's probably met most of the stars.
(He doesn't like any of the gory violent holo shows).
Then one day he says he's in town. Does she want to meet up?
And that's how she becomes friends with Finnick Odair.
"I don't really have any friends," he tells her.
"Not even back home?" Aurelia says.
"I used to," Finnick says, frowning. "But it sort of got all weird when I won. I guess they see me differently now."
It's weird, being friends with someone famous. Finnick always wears dark glasses and a hat when they go out, but people still recognise him. Aurelia is usually the one that has to take photographs when they get stopped. Sometimes they just don't stop. Sometimes Finnick just grabs her hand and pulls her away and they run away to hide laughing. Sometimes they have to run away from cameras.
Still it's fun. Finnick is fun.
Cordelia thinks Aurelia and Finnick are dating (and so of course is amazingly jealous). It's not like that though. Finnick is her friend. She thinks he needs a friend much more than he needs a girlfriend. Besides can you imagine being Finnick Odair's girlfriend? No thank you, that sounds far too stressful and Finnick is simply far too unavailable.
They go for coffee mostly. Finnick likes his sweet with ridiculous quantities of sugar. Aurelia takes him to all the best coffee shops she knows and at each one he orders the most outlandish, sickly sweet, monstrosity on the menu. Aurelia sticks to her cappuccino. After a few months, she realises he's never had a milkshake so they then have to go and sample a milkshake at every place she can think of that sells them.
He tells her about his life in District Four. About his home and his life and his family.
One day he talks about the Hunger Games.
"What's it like to win the Hunger Games?" Aurelia asks. They're sitting outside a cafe on central avenue, drinking iced coffee.
"It's… it's not what I expected," Finnick says.
"In what way?"
"I wanted this. I wanted the fame and the money and the attention. But the reality… It's like… I feel I'm living in a dream I once had. Like one of those really vivid dreams you get with a fever, when you're ill. A dream that starts off beautiful but then you realise everything is not quite right, and that really it's all ugly underneath."
He's talking about the Capitol she realises. Finnick hates the Capitol although he won't tell her as much. He likes to pretend he's happy here, but Aurelia is beginning to realise he doesn't choose to be here. She's beginning to realise that maybe he doesn't have complete control over his life.
(She's beginning to realise that he's not at all the person the holonet makes him out to be).
"I thought so many times about what it would be like to win the Hunger Games," Finnick says. "About how I would be, how I would feel but nothing is quite what I envisioned. Like, I was too young, or too naïve to properly see things the way they were. It's all a big lie, winning the Hunger Games. What they tell you… it's all a big misconception."
Aurelia lets his words sink in for a moment. She listens to the sounds of the passing traffic.
"A fever dream misconception," she says, sounding the words out in her mouth. "Sounds like a title for one of your poems."
This makes him laugh for a moment.
"I'm not sure a poem about how my feverish misconceptions have fallen false of reality would be well received by the president," he says. He doesn't like the president either. Aurelia thinks maybe the president is the one that makes him come to the Capitol.
"No, perhaps not," she agrees. "Maybe you would write it just for me though."
"Maybe," he agrees.
She doesn't seem him for quite a long time after that meeting, although she knows he's been in the Capitol. The holonet is full of pictures of him out partying with socialites. She asked him once why he was always out partying.
"It's expected of me," he says which does make sense when she thinks about it. A lot of the Victors seem to go out partying. Still, Aurelia couldn't help feeling that Finnick doesn't really enjoy it.
It's several months later when there is a knock at the door one morning. It's about 10am and luckily Aurelia is the only one home, else it might be difficult to explain why Finnick Odair is on the doorstep. Especially considering the way he's dressed.
But Finnick Odair is on the doorstep and he looks awful. Not awful ugly because if course Finnick will always be beautiful, but there is smudged makeup around his eyes and his hair is all sticking up at a weird angle and are those feathers in the back? He's wearing tight, tight leather trousers, a velvet cape, streaks of golden body glitter and very little else. There's bruising around his neck and wrists and his pupils are blown wide.
Aurelia invites him in.
He stumbles a bit and so she helps him stay upright. She makes him some coffee and tells him to take a shower and half an hour later he's sitting on her family's sofa wrapped up in a blanket and wearing a pair of her father's trousers.
He still seems quite out of it, but maybe the coffee is helping a bit. He won't tell her what happened, but the bruising and the clothing and the fact that he's obviously coming down off some drug paints a certain picture. Until he starts crying that is and Aurelia becomes even more confused.
They watch the holo for a while, one of Finnick's favourite fantasy dramas until his hands have stopped shaking and he's beginning to seem more like himself again. He leaves before anyone else gets home and they never talk about it again. But from that moment on, Aurelia worries about him every time she sees a picture of him out partying. She worries that no one will be there in the morning to make him coffee, and she worries that no one will be there to hold him when he cries.
("What's it like being a Victor?" she asks him once.
"It's knowing you're never going to be free," Finnick says.)