Chapter 85: Facing Reality

When Ritsuko conducted and finished her tests with Toji, she took him over to the operation's building of NERV HQ. After a relative short walk and going into Misato's office, the Major was not seen.

"Hmm…" the head scientist stated looking at her watch. Her eyes blinked and narrowed realizing how long she has been awake and working.

"Guess she's runnin' a little late?" Toji asked.

"…a little bit. Have you eaten yet?" she asked seeing him shake his head no. "Alright, let's head to the cafeteria. I haven't eaten anything for a while either and could use a caffeine intake."

Nodding, both left the office and headed toward the cafeteria. Once both reached it, there was a small number of employees in line and sitting at tables or stools. The doctor told him that she will pay and stated to grab whatever he'd like. Seeing that he got a standard breakfast and orange juice, she settled for coffee and a pastry. Sitting down at a table, Ritsuko took in the warmth that the black beverage gave being held in her hands. Taking a sip, her insides started to warm up swallowing the coffee.

"…" she said placing the cup on the table and staring at it. Recalling events after the Angel attack, she pulled another all-nighter. Doing nothing but tests, screenings, MAGI calculations, and trying to figure out what happened with Unit-01 made her feel more than exhausted. Thinking about how the dummy-plug system operated, she felt her eyelids close from feeling so heavy.

"Ya okay doc?" the jock asked quietly seeing the faux blonde jerk her head up a little.

"…yeah…" she responded blinking her eyes open and shaking her head a little. "Just a bit tired."

"Hey doc, can I ask you something about Shinji?" Toji stated looking at his plate.

"Hmm? What about him?"

"Well…was he really…a demon?" he asked looking up with a serious face.

"…a demon?" Ritsuko repeated blinking then smirked. "Last time I did a test on him, no. Why?"

"Phew," he said with relief. "I thought for sure he was havin' those devil eyes. He told me that his eyes got hurt and were recovering. So at the time, he was wearing some hi-tech contacts or just colored ones, right?"

"…" the doctor reacted feeling more awake. "You saw his eyes?"

"Yeah. I-I mean, if I wasn't supposed to I'm sorry. I was curious at the time and h-he didn't seem to mind showin' me."

"No…it is alright," Ritsuko answered taking another sip of the coffee. She saw him relax even more and starting drinking his orange juice.

"To answer your question accurately, those were the colors of his eyes after an Angel battle. He wasn't wearing any contacts."

"…!?" Toji responded spitting out his orange juice in a mist to his side. "What!? Those were real!?"

Seeing her nod, he set down his drink and shivered in his seat. Normally, that sight of gag comedy would have made her feel better. However, the aspect that mildly joking about the deceased male pilot still stung. Thinking that she was just too tired, she mentioned to Toji to take his time eating. Both finished their breakfast in awkward silence. Making their way back to Misato's office, they found that she was there. Toji felt elated to see his commanding officer, but she looked very tired. Thinking it was from the loss of the male pilot, he decided to just focus on what they needed from him.

"Morning Rits. Is he clear?"

"Morning. Yes, he is overall in good health. I got him discharged a bit ago."

"That's good," Misato said smiling at him which he gave a small smile back.

"He stated he wanted to know what happen during the previous Angel attack."

"So…you want to know what happen yesterday." Misato asked.

"Yes ma'am."

"I'll be taking my leave Misato. See you later," Ritsuko said walking away and gave a back hand wave. After leaving, the office door closed.

"Okay. Just to let you know, this isn't a clip from a horror movie or anything. But it is up to that level. You really sure?"

"…" Toji steeled himself and nodded his head.

"…" Misato stated then reached into her desk to pull out a portable monitor. It was a small 10" x 10" screen with added plug-ins and slots. Turning it on, she picked up a miniature CD that was on the desk and inserted it into the monitor. Handing him the screen, he held it and gulped.

"This is visual only. There isn't any audio," she added. Seeing him nod, the screen flickered to life and started the video. When the video ended, the Fourth Child had a horrified facial expression. Misato looked stoically at her desk for a second before turning to him.

"Wha-Wha-What the hell happened!?" he asked shaking all over.

"We are still trying to figure that out."

"…Are…all the robots like that? Explode you while in the cockpit?" he wondered scared.

"No…just Unit-01. Your Eva, Unit-03 was infected with a new type of Angel. It overtook the Eva at a microscopic level. Rather a miracle that you came out with only bruises inside of what could have happened."

"Y-Yeah?" the Fourth Child said quietly though didn't look convinced.

"Listen, you weren't involved in what happened. No one is going to blame you. It was your first time synching up with your Unit. Anything could happen so don't feel like you can't do this. This is just a very bad freak accident for right now."

"…" Toji commented looking at her still scared. Looking back at the monitor in his hand.

"What were those orange lightening things and black halos? Are the Evas themselves demons, angels, or demigods of some kind?"

"…" Misato stated keeping a straight face. The aspect that she wondered that herself made her feel that she wasn't too crazy to think that way.

"I honestly do not know. You'd have to ask Ritsuko that question."

"…" he said shivering a little. He handed back the portable monitor to her.

"I'm assuming…all this is a secret, right?"

"Yep."

"O-Okay…so…what's next?"

"Since you are good to go, here comes the depressing part. We are going to send you back to school. A rep will go with you to excuse all the absences you occurred while you were here. As the other pilots were ordered, you still need to go to school. At the same time, you must treat what you just saw as if it never happened," Misato stated seeing his eyes widen a little bit.

"On another note, don't play hooky. Just because you are Eva pilot doesn't excuse you from not going to school or passing your classes. Is that clear?"

"Yes ma'am," he replied with a sigh of disappointment.

"Well, that is all I have for you now. If there isn't anything else, I'll call the rep to get you," she said and saw him shake his head side to side.

"I'm good and ready to go."

Calling the NERV rep, it took the individual some minutes to get to Misato's office. Saying goodbye to the Fourth Child, Misato sat back in her office chair. Seeing the monitor on her desk, she immediately put it in the filing drawer. Looking at her paper work in her inbox, she grabbed all of them to take her mind off of the remembrance of what was playing on that portable screen. A cold shiver went through her thinking about the combusting scene and the eerie voice that came through the speakers in the command center.

At the South-East Police station, Rayne was pacing around in the shooting range. Ever since she had that sensation in her chest yesterday, she had been brooding about the significance from it. Despite witnessing the altercation of the Third Child into the evil version, a part of her still cared for him. Though meeting him and the others at his new apartment went bad, she had called him on two separate occasions afterward to see how he was doing. From hearing him over the phone and not seeing him, it felt like how they talked before...until things went downhill.

'I bet it is nothing,' she thought turning around and walking to the opposite wall.

'I bet it is like last time.'

'I am just worrying and reading too much into what that was yesterday.'

'I say that,' she thought reaching the wall and turning around again to continue pacing.

'But I still have that nagging feeling from before.'

Stopping, she pulled out her cell phone and began looking through it for his cell number. A part of her wanted to hear his voice and him state that he was fine. Another part thought that she was overacting. Trying to reason with herself, Rayne kept staring at the number. Her thumb kept going back and forth from hovering over the call button and off of it. Sighing out loud and pressing it, she closed her eyes and brought the phone to her ear.

"…" she said starting to pace again as the phone was ringing.

After the fifth ring, the voicemail recording started. Remembering that he was a school student, he wouldn't answer his cell during class. Deciding to leave a message and ending the call, the nagging feeling never went away. After putting her mobile phone away, she reasoned to herself to go back to work. Leaving the shooting range, Rayne closed the door to hear mild commotion somewhere in the station.

'What's going on?' Rayne thought hearing a lot of murmurs from the officers in the building. Walking to the low wall of cubical spaces, a portion of staff was whispering to each other while others were looking over or around their cubicles in a certain direction. Going down the hallway a little, she got to Jack's office. He was standing in the doorway looking toward the admin and Chief's office.

"Hey Jack, what's going on?" she whispered getting closer to him. He glanced back and lifted his head up and down.

"Hey," he spoke quietly back then glanced back as she stood next to him.

"I am not sure," he replied putting his arms across his chest. "Three guys in black suits, sunglasses, and ear pieces walked in. They are in Chief's office."

"Sounds like agents."

"Yeah. Don't know which organization they belong to. Could be from the government too for all we know right now."

"Wonder what they are here for?" Rayne asked when both saw Nami leaving Ryu's office. She looked stressed and spotted the orange eyed officer. Looking nervously behind her, the secretary walked toward them while doing a hand motion of walking with one hand and pointing toward Jack.

"…" Rayne said looking at him to see the tech officer blink then moved into his office. Following him, Nami came into the office shortly after and closed the door a little.

"What's going on over there?" Jack asked interested.

"SELEE agents are here," she answered taking a deep breath then exhaled.

"S-SELEE?! Why are they here?!" he stated surprised.

"…" Nami said then looked at the young female officer.

"…is it me they want?" Rayne asked seeing the secretary nod. "Did they state what for?"

"Ryu tried getting as much information as possible. He didn't get much, just the usual run around."

"And if I refuse to go with them?"

"Then Officer Hymity," one of the SELEE agents stated opening the door. "We will furlough this station for disorderly conduct and harm of our agents in the field."

"Oh, is that so?" Rayne stated. Turning toward the operative, she gave a small smile. Moving closer to him, she saw her eyes glowing a little from the reflection of his shades.

"I haven't paid SELEE back for kidnapping me earlier," she said softly seeing the agent wasn't fazed by the haunting shine. "If you would allow me to pay you guys back, then I will come along willingly."

"I don't care. You will-!?," the man said then got punched painfully in the ribs. He was about to gasp when the female officer snatched her hand over his mouth and gripped it murderously.

"Wow…you are still conscious. Come, let's go get the others," Rayne said putting him in a headlock with one arm and keeping the other hand over his mouth.

"…" both Jack and Nami watched with surprised faces.

As the young officer dragged the grunting and injured operative out of the room, they followed. Other cops in the building turned toward the new commotion and were watching one of the black suits struggling and being dragged from one office to the Chief's office. Seeing where the other two agents were in the room, Rayne opened the door quickly. The two operatives that were standing in front of Ryu's desk turned around to see their other member being thrown at them.

Reacting fast enough, both agents caught him. However, the young officer rushed in and did a hard roundhouse kick to the operative toward her right. Knocked unconscious and colliding into the remaining one standing, they fell to the floor. The pinned agent tried to get out his firearm when he got knocked out from a hard kick to his face. The operative that was thrown was about to move when a pistol muzzle contacted his forehead. Looking at the individual, it was the female officer pointing her gun at him.

"…" the conscious operative said slowly shifting to try to get to his service firearm.

"Ah-ah-ah," the female officer said wagging her finger while pushing the muzzle of her pistol on his forehead harder.

"…" Ryu said putting a hand on his face sighing through his nose.

"You think doing this to us will go unnoticed?" the agent said sweating a little.

"On the contrary, this is just payback for the kidnapping stunt earlier. Since I am the only one acting out of line, it should be fine. DON'T YOU AGREE?" Rayne said with a sweet smile.

"…" the SELEE agent said then heard his ear piece turn on. After hearing the message, he gritted his teeth.

"…fine…"

"Good. Shall we go then?"

"What about them?" he asked when all she did was grin widely.

Both Nami and Jack came to the doorway of Ryu's office along with officers looking through the office windows. All watched as the younger officer hog tied the conscious agent first. She then proceeded to hog tie the others. She ignored the agent yelling at her and his threats to shutdown the station. Taking one of the other agent's earpieces and putting in her ear, she dragged the knocked out agents to the unmarked van that was parked directly in front of the police entrance. Coming back to the one still awake, she untied him. From humiliation and irritation, he threw a punch at the young officer to only get a pistol in his mouth.

"Gahk!" he said trying to back up as Rayne kept up with his pace. He hit the side wall in the Chief's office and felt the pistol go a little further in his mouth.

"I'm sorry, what were you going to say or do?"

"…"

"Hmm, speak up. I can't hear you clearly," she stated still smiling and pulling the hammer back.

"…" the agent said feeling beads of sweat dripping down his back and forehead.

"How boring," Rayne said grabbing the agent's back collar. Pulling the handgun out and repositioning it to the person's back, she pushed him forward.

"..." the SELEE agent said gritting his teeth and walked forward.

"Bye," was all she could muster while pushing the agent out of the room and ignoring the staring eyes of all the officers nearby.

By the time both got into the van, everyone was at the entrance watching them. Telling the agent to drive, the van turned on and started backing up shortly after. Nami started waving a little with a depressed face which trickled to all the other officers. Ryu was the last one to raise his hand for a moment before putting it down. Once the van got onto the street and was out of sight, he and Nami were the last ones standing at the entrance as the other officers slowly went back to their spaces. A small amount of silence went between them before the secretary spoke up.

"What do you think will happen to her?"

"…" the Chief said rubbing the back of his neck with one hand. "Other than interrogation and possible imprisonment, I don't know."

"Is it because Ikari took her into one of their secured areas?"

"That and the fact that she knows one of their secrets that is to be kept hidden from the public."

"How damaging is the secret?"

"I have no clue…but to go this far to threaten a police station shutdown and furlough the entire staff, must be pretty severe," Ryu said getting out his pack of cigarettes.

"You think Ikari is at the SELEE facility?"

"I think he has some protection being at NERV."

"…" Nami said looking at the ground depressingly. She saw him offer a cigarette in which she took one. Both stepped outside to smoke.

By the time Toji and the NERV rep reached the school, lunchtime was in session. Both went to the administration office without causing much attention. After entering the building and some time passed, all paperwork was straighten out. The Fourth Child wouldn't have the string of absences tied onto his record. It also included sudden absences when an Angel attack occurred or when NERV had testing to do for the pilot. Leaving the admin office, both parted ways and waved goodbye.

'Guess I'll head back to homeroom,' he thought walking forward.

Upon arriving to the classroom, he peered in. Not seeing any students, he sighed in relief. Entering and going toward his desk, he stopped next to his. Looking up and finding a particular desk in the front row, he had flashbacks of who was sitting in it. The first one was when the Third Child had dark magenta eyes. Another came with him having blackout glasses on with scars on his body. A third came seeing a close up of Shinji's face with black-red eyes and his stoic expression.

'…' Toji thought shaking his head side to side to rid of the images. 'Feels awkward that you are gone.'

Sitting down on his desk, he put his arms on it. Resting his head on them, he was wondering what he could and couldn't say to his classmates. Knowing the run down of information was okay, a lot of NERV stuff was not okay to say to the public.

'I wonder how the other pilots will react,' he thought thinking about each one. Remember that the female twin was considered a backup pilot, he cringed.

'…ah shit…she probably hates me,' he thought wondering what would happen when he crossed paths with Rana. Too wrapped up in his thoughts, he didn't notice one person walking into the classroom.

"T-Toji?!" Kensuke stated with a smile heading over to his desk. "You're back!"

"Kensuke…h-hey man," Toji said lifting his head up and turning toward his friend with a smile. "How've ya been?"

"I've been alright. Where did you go!? You all the sudden just vanished out of nowhere!"

"Y-Yeah…stuff happened," the male pilot stated feeling uneasy. He heard his friend sighed.

"Let me guess…you became the next Eva pilot, right?"

"Y-yeah…sorry man for not telling you."

"It's alright," Aida said though he was crying with jealousy.

'Same old military nut,' Toji thought with a smirk.

"Well, you can make it up to your friend by telling me all about your Eva and what you have been doing so far!" Kensuke stated sitting in his desk with excitement on his face.

"Whoa there man. There is stuff I can't say to anyone except NERV staff!"

"Oh yeah? Did Major Katsuragi order you?" he asked with a smug.

"Ha! Damn straight she did!" Toji stated with an equal smug back. As they were conversing back and forth, two more students came back to the classroom. Both male students didn't hear them enter. One of them gasped to herself while the other continued talking to her.

'…!?' Hikari thought feeling her insides tighten and feeling relieved. 'He came back.'

"…" Asuka said stopping and looking at the other two students.

Recognizing both, her face became rigid. Irritation gathered in her mind still finding that the jock being the new Eva pilot was incomprehensible. Knowing that she couldn't change anything, she decided that she needed to get something off her chest. Before the Class Rep could call the boys out, she saw the Second Child immediately went to them. Both stooges noticed someone coming toward them. Turning to the person, both recoiled a little seeing the Second Child stopping next to their desks.

"You," Asuka stated and pointed at the jock. "Come with me."

"Eh? Why?" Toji asked then got his ear pulled by the redhead. "O-o-o-o-ow!"

"Stop complaining you stooge. Move it!" she stated leaving the classroom with him in tow complaining.

"…?" both Kensuke and Hikari stated blinking a couple of times. Looking at each other, they both wondered what just happened. Moving away from the classroom and into an enclosed adjacent to the walkway, the Second Child let go of his ear. Grimacing and covering his ear with his hand, he looked back at her irritated.

"What the hell was that for?!"

"Shut up. I am going to only explain this once so pay attention. It's about the Third Child."

"…" Toji said changing his irritated expression quickly. Standing up straight and putting on a neutral face, he looked directly at her.

"Go ahead."

"Hmph. Listen. Nobody knows that he's dead. We are ordered to keep it that way. Anybody asks, just say he is at NERV. Got it?" she stated seeing him nod.

"Both Wondergirl and Rana are a bit sensitive to anything mentioned about the Third so keep a tight lip about it around them. Also, don't spill the beans to the other stooge even though he's your friend. I haven't told Hikari."

"I understand," he said with another firm nod.

"Now that you understand, let me inform you of some facts. I am the best pilot there is. You are nowhere near me so get that into your thick skull…hey, are you listening!?" she asked getting irate from him looking away from her.

"Hey," he asked looking very insecure. "How…how do I face them?"

"What are you talking about?" Asuka asked frowning with hands on her hips.

"You know…Ayanami and Rana…in regards to the…Angel attack."

"Hmph," Asuka said tossing a couple of locks over her shoulder and put on a mocking smirk. "That's your problem stooge. You just have to deal with whatever they say or do to you. Hopefully you don't get too hurt."

"…" Toji said then glared at her. "Ya know what? You're a bigger bitch than I remember! Thanks for nothing fire demon!"

"W-What you say dickhead!?" she said out loud and getting in his face.

"Get outta of my face," he said quietly narrowing his eyes at her and standing his ground.

"Better apologize stooge," the redhead said in a low tone narrowing her eyes at him.

"Hey! What's going on here!?" Hikari shouted at them seeing both giving death glares at each other. When she got closer, Toji broke off the angry stare match and walked back to class with hands in his pockets.

"Remember what I told you jock," Asuka said frowning and watching him walk away. Her expression turned into a scowl seeing him not turning back but giving her the middle finger as he rounded the corner.

"Asuka, what happened? Why were you two arguing?"

"It was about NERV stuff. I was telling him his place and that he should understand orders from his senior and experienced pilots. That asshole was giving me back talk when I was trying to help him!"

"…something did happen…didn't it?" Horaki asked quietly.

'…crap…' Asuka thought feeling the pent up emotions inside subside greatly. She then treaded carefully in explaining that he was the new Eva pilot while going back to the classroom.

'Damn her!' Toji thought slamming a fist down on the walkway side wall.

Continuing forward, some students got out of his way from the nasty glare on his face. When he opened up the rear door to his homeroom, he looked up and saw more students inside. His irate expression, feelings, and thoughts turned to ice when he saw both Ayanami and Rana. Both were engaged in what seemed like mild conversation at the front of the classroom. Gulping and feeling butterflies in his stomach, he walked quietly toward them. Both of them noticed him and turned to him.

"Suzuhara," Ayanami said with a stoic expression and tone.

"Hello," Rana smiled weakly and gave a drained sounding greeting. The sound of the twin's voice made him very nervous and racked his brain in guilt.

"H-Hey there Ayanami and…R-Rana," he said then cleared his throat feeling a little warm underneath his jersey.

"Are ya two d-doin' okay?" Toji stammered unable to look them in the face.

"I am fine," the First Child said blinking and analyzing what he was doing.

"I am a bit tired…are…you okay?" Rana asked finding his behavior peculiar and not acting like himself.

"I'm…uh…w-well…u-um…" he said closing his hands into fists.

The guilt he felt made him clench his hands harder and his teeth as well. Unable to lift his head, he couldn't face the possible accusing eyes that both the females could be showing him. It made him feel extremely small. Sweat started building a little on his back and decided to face their actions. Taking a deep breath in and out, he stepped back and deeply bowed.

"I'm…I'm sorry!" he said in a quiet voice for them to hear. The couple of students that were in the classroom watching were quiet and blinking in confusion. They never had seen the jock act this way before. Even Kensuke was surprised.

"…" Rei said blinking then tilted her head in confusion.

She was not sure what he was sorry for. About to ask him why, she felt she couldn't reply. Something about the Fourth Child's gesture and how fidgety and tense he was made responding to him harder. Fearing that she might lose composure, she decided to not dwell any further and not say anything.

Rana didn't say anything either, but could figure what the jock was trying to say. Seeing how out of sorts he was, she felt that he shared the same type of loss and pain. Remembering that both he and Aida were classmates with Shinji and maybe friends, there was a connection of similar emotional stress. In some ways, it made her want to cry that he showed that much care. However knowing what she was ordered to do, she had to do a different approach. She needed to show strength and willpower. Once back home or at NERV, she could let go again.

Stepping toward him as he was still bowing, Rana gently place her hand under his chin. Toji flinched a little then slowly rose to stand straight. His eyes were closed tightly at first, then slowly opened them feeling her hand gently poke his cheek. Blinking a couple of times and looking at the female twin, he saw that the twin had a tight smile on her face. Rei kept a stoic expression which was normal and not comforting. Turning back to Rana, the split mirror image of being a twin made him instantly think of Shinji's image. Feeling her hand retract from his face, he listened and waited.

"It wasn't your fault…but…thank you for caring," she said softly.

"…" Toji said feeling an immense release of weight and guilt from his shoulders and mind. So much so, he could only stare in amazement for how strong willed both were. Feeling like he could move again and swallowing the lump in his throat, he gave a small smile and slowly nodded.

The rest of the class periods went on as normal as it could be. By the time class ended, Hikari told Asuka that she needed to talk to Suzuhara regarding missed days of school. Seeing her frown, the Second Child nodded her head and left the room. The Class Rep watched as Ayanami and Rana walked out of the classroom at different times. Both of them had an aura of being drained and depressed.

"Hey Toji, you want to hit the arcade?" Kensuke asked when the Horaki came up to them.

"Sorry Aida. I need to talk to Suzuhara after school regarding how he missed a few days," Hikari stated in which Toji cringed.

"Oh, alright. Well, I'll see you tomorrow then!" the bespectacled student said clapping the jock's shoulder before leaving. When the remaining students left, they were the remaining ones in the classroom. Hikari brought her bag over and set it down on the desk in front of Toji's.

"I guess we can get started with—hey! What are you doing?" she asked seeing him stand up.

"Sorry Class Rep. I haven't eaten anything since this morning. I'm going to get somethin' from the vending machines then come back," he replied with an apologetic smile.

"…!" Hikari said with a mild surprised realizing it was an opening for her to take action.

"W-wait," she said opening up her bag and getting the extra bento out. "I-If you are hungry, I have an extra bento if you like."

"…?" he commented looking at her then at the lunchbox.

"I-I made a b-bit extra last night. It would be a waste to throw it away," she explained feeling butterflies in her stomach and trying to keep a straight face.

"…?" Toji said again looking at her then the lunchbox again. "Uh…alright. I guess."

He grasped the bento and set himself down at his desk. Opening it up and grabbing the spare chopsticks inside, he began to eat it. Hikari had to sit herself down in the desk in front of his to contain her nervousness.

"Is it okay?" she asked with a hopeful look.

"Hmm?" he asked with a mouthful. "Ya. Tastes good. So, wha'cha want to talk about?"

"…" she said feeling pleased and at ease. Placing a hand on her chest, she felt her heart beating a little quicker.

'Thank you Ikari.'

She asked the Fourth Child about what did he do during his absence. Toji did his best to make up a half-truth about moving his sister to a better medical facility and picking up a part-time job. The Class Rep already knew what his part-time job was, but just continued to listen to him talk. Playing a little with one end of her double ponytail, it helped contain her nervousness. She smiled a little feeling her first attempt was successful.