I know I'm slightly neglecting Earthly Wonders and Trespass at the moment, but I have so many ideas flowing for this! Don't worry, I'll get back to them… for now, have some more of these loves!

As the term went on Clara started to feel much more at home in the school. Jess, Faye and herself had quite the routine between them now and the number of attacks were decreasing every week thanks to Paula's work and their support. Paula would always be with her in lessons, but she was rarely needed outside of that. Clara spent a lot of time studying with the others and helping them out if needed.

They were back in the library one Thursday afternoon, biology work out on the table. It was nearing half term so they had quite a few projects to finish up. They'd been working through one of the chapters in the textbook. Clara glanced up when she heard the rabble of people walk in, Jess and Faye quickly followed. "What on earth is Jackie doing in the library?"

"Who knows, let's get back to this - they're not worth our attention if we're honest," Faye responded to Jess' comment.

Jess turned back to her book, "ergh I don't get it, hormones are complicated."

"No kidding…" Clara mumbled as she caught sight of Danny for a second. She'd generally kept out of his way since the first couple of weeks, and he had returned the favour.

"Don't be stupid, you've already finished it you can't fool me," Faye rolled her eyes and pointed to where Clara had put her arm over her notepad to hide her work. "It's fine, any chance of sharing your wisdom or are you just going to stare into thin air all evening?" Clara sat herself up and cleared her throat, bringing her attention back to the matter at hand.

"Sorry, okay so hormones are secreted by the glands shown in the diagram, the question is talking about how they all work together and affect the body. The first part wants to know about the use of hormones on the female reproductive system…" she spotted them grinning, "you're both actually children!" Jess and Faye both burst out laughing and Clara put her pen down, lifting her hands up. "I give up!"

Jess chuckled and rolled her eyes, "you're far too mature Clara Oswald, have a laugh sometimes!"

"Oh I do, usually at you," Clara pointed out, "hormones?"

"Hormones."

She finally explained the question and they all got through the work, "oh man it's got late, we should get back to the room before we're slaughtered by Madame LaChere," they all chuckled slightly. Their French teacher was a bit of a nightmare when she was on night duty. Clara cleared up her books and followed them out, rather glad she could finally go to sleep and clear her mind of everything she was thinking about right now.

#-#-#-#

Saturday came far too quickly and suddenly everyone was getting ready to go home. Some people had already gone and Jess' parents had just arrived. "See you in 8 days then," she hugged Clara, "you can call anytime okay?" Clara nodded, clearly a little nervous at the prospect of half term.

"I will, have a good holiday," she smiled, trying to keep positive.

"I'm sure your Dad will be happy to see you," Jess told her. Clara really wasn't sure… she'd missed her Dad, but she'd missed him since her Mum died even when she was at home so that wasn't new. She missed her Gran more, that was the one thing she couldn't wait for. "See you guys," Jess smiled and jogged off to join her parents as they left. Clara and Faye sat back down on the sofa where they'd been.

"What time is he coming?" Faye asked and Clara shrugged, "hasn't he told you?"

"He's never been one for organisation to be honest," Clara told her, "Mum always used to do that bit. He'll turn up at some point," she smiled a little at some of the memories that came to mind.

"You're a lot better at talking about that now you know?" Faye pointed out, "you barely mentioned her when you first arrived - it'd make you panic."

"Dad never wanted to talk about it, I guess I got used to him getting angry when I bought it up, but Paula made me talk to you two about it and now it feels a little more normal - it actually helps, it usually brings up good memories when we talk about the little things like that," she told her.

Faye smiled, "well we like hearing about her, she sounds like a great Mum," she told her. "Anyway, what you going to do this week?"

"Probably read mostly, maybe go round to my Gran's a bit if she's not too busy. Sounds dull I know, but I like it," she chuckled as Faye looked at her very confused. "What about you?"

"I think my brother is going to drive us to blackpool at some point, and Mum said something about a couple of days away but she didn't say where. Should be alright though, minus the work we have to do…" Clara chuckled at her disgust before looking round as she heard her name. She jumped up when she saw her Gran, running over and hugging her.

"I didn't know you were coming?!" her Gran hugged her tightly back. Faye smiled at the sight between the two of them.

"I've missed you silly. Your Dad will be here in a minute love, he dropped me at the front. How've you been?" Clara finally let go and stood up.

"Yeah okay, it's alright here," she looked over at Faye who came to join them. "This is one of my roommates Faye, Jess already left with her parents."

Her Gran greeted Faye, "been looking after my girl then?" Clara rolled her eyes, a little embarrassed.

"Gran they're my friends not my carers," she smiled, "but they have been really good with me, even when I was in hospital."

"Hospital?! When was this?!" Clara almost jumped at her voice. "Why didn't anyone tell us?!"

Faye looked a little shocked too, "it's fine. Paula, my support teacher, she tried to ring but there was no answer. I told her not to bother Dad and I said I'd ring him but… well, I didn't want to worry him, you know what he can be like." Clara shrugged.

"You said he knew Clara," Faye told her, "they need to know what to do if-" Clara stopped her there.

"I'll explain it all later," she gave her a look that Faye understood, but evidently her Gran did not. Just at this moment her Dad walked through the door.

"What exactly do we need to know? Dave there's something wrong with Clara and she won't tell me what!" Dave didn't exactly speed over.

"There's always something wrong these days," he mumbled, "what is it this time?"

Clara got in before her Gran could respond to that, "it's fine, it's nothing. We can talk at home honestly it can wait," she clenched her hands a little, feeling her palms get sweaty. Faye shook her head but Clara tried to ignore it. "Can I just get my bags and we can go? Please?" She walked off and out of the room, "I'll be back in 5," she told them and went up to the their dorm.

"Clara's been having fits," Faye told them as soon as she was gone.

"Sorry who are you?" Dave asked.

"One of her roommates and best friends, and she's been having fits. They think it's linked to her pre existing problems. It's not like epilepsy so it's not as easily controlled by medication. She's had about 4 or 5 this term, but she only had to go to hospital with the first one. Clara knows when they're going to happen now, and she knows what to do - we all do. Paula took us through everything so we can help her when it happens. If it goes on for more than 5 minutes, then she has to go to hospital, but otherwise just keep her safe and out of danger. I know she doesn't want me telling you all this but you have to know - you're her Dad!" she directed that to Dave. "Clara's told us some of what's gone on, but not a lot about you. I don't know whether you just don't care or you're scared to care, but she's your daughter and she needs you more than she'll admit." Faye looked at the clock, "I need to go and check she's alright before my parents arrive."

There was a pause before Dave spoke. "Can you take me?" he asked suddenly, looking somewhat shocked and a little teary. "I think I have an apology to make." Faye smiled a little at her achievement and nodded, leading him up to the room.

When they arrived she opened the door slowly and looked inside. Clara was sat on the edge of the bed looking at the floor, something didn't look right. "Clara?" Faye went over and saw her eyes. "Right let's lie you back," she told her and helped Clara lie down. She looked round and saw Dave stood in the entrance. "Are you coming in or what?!"

Dave didn't answer or move, he just watched as Clara started shaking on the bed. Faye kept a small distance between them as she did. "I need to get Paula, can you just come inside and sit with her?!" Faye kept glancing at the clock for timings. Dave didn't answer again and instead walked backwards and away from the room. "oh for goodness sake…" she sighed and looked at Clara's phone on the side - her only option now, but it was locked.

"Can I do anything?" Faye looked up and saw Clara's gran at the door. She let out a breath she didn't even realise she'd been holding and nodded.

"I need to get her support teacher, can you stay with Clara? Just watch she doesn't injure herself but don't get too close." Faye quickly got up and left while Clara's gran came in and sat beside her.

She sat down and knew she could only watch, "oh my love what's happened to you? I knew I should have called you before this but your Dad convinced me we should let you settle in. I'm sorry sweetheart, but I'm glad you've made some good friends who are looking after you," she stopped talking when Clara seemed to settle. As soon as she was still she moved to sit on the edge of the bed.

Paula walked in a few seconds later, "when did she stop fitting?"

"Only about 30 seconds ago," Clara's gran replied and Paula nodded. "Is this what happens now?"

"Not all the time, but sometimes. Faye said her Dad was being a little off? Where is he now?" Paula asked and her Gran sighed.

"Goodness knows," she started. "He's struggled to cope with Clara's anxiety problems since her Mum died. Dealing with his own grief as well got too much - that's why she came here. I wasn't overly happy about it, but it was probably the best thing for both of them. I thought things might be a little better now, but maybe not…"

Clara started to stir now and looked up at her Gran, "where's Dad?" she asked, sitting up carefully.

"I'm not sure love, but don't rush to get up," she told her, but Clara shook her head.

"I'm fine, just kinda tired. Where did he go? I need to talk to him," Clara swung her legs over and stood up, taking a moment to get her head together. She looked round at the three people currently looking at her concerned. "I know what's happened, it's happened, I'm fine. What's the point in stressing about it?" Clara sighed and walked out of the room to find her Dad.

Dave was back in the common room exactly where Clara expected him to be - it's not like he knew anywhere else in the school and there was nobody else in there. Paula had followed her down, Clara presumed that Faye was filling her Gran in on what had just happened. "Please wait out here, I need to talk to him alone."

"Just don't get worked up Clara, you're still vulnerable," Paula told her, "I'll wait just out here so if you need me you can shout." Clara nodded before going inside and shutting the door behind her. Dave looked up from the door to see her walk over and sit beside him on the sofa.

"You were…" Dave didn't quite know what to say clearly. "Are you okay?" he finally asked.

"Yes. Tired, but the fits do that to you. I'll probably sleep a lot later, but I needed to talk to you now," she told him. "Do you really think of me as a big set of problems?" she asked him outright. Something she'd noticed about herself was that when she woke up from the fits she had quite a bit more confidence for a couple of hours - something she often made the most of.

Dave was obviously stunned at the question, "Clara I…" he sighed and turned to look at her. "you're my little girl and I worry about you, but I don't know what to do for the best anymore. I've never been able to help you when you have your attacks, and now the fits as well, I just can't do it!" Dave stood up, "clearly you're much better off here than at home."

"Yeah Dad, but incase you hadn't noticed I can't live here all the time! You're meant to be looking after me, but it feels like I have to tell you what to do about this and that shouldn't be my job!" Clara told him honestly. "I miss you! I miss how we used to be, I miss when you cared! I hate walking on eggshells around you, I hate not being able to talk to you, I hate that you don't love me anymore because Mum died!" She stood up now, "I'm going to get my bags, then we can go." Clara walked out before he could reply and walked past Paula, but didn't go to her room and instead went to the library - somewhere she felt safe.

"Clara?" she looked up from where she'd ended up sat on the floor in her usual corner to see Danny stood looking at her. "Sorry, I walked by the common room and heard Paula and who I presume was your Dad talking saying you'd run off - I figured you might be here." Danny sat down beside her and Clara sighed, "talk to me?" Clara didn't reply, looking down at the floor. "Everyone else has gone, Jackie and all her gang, they're not here. There's nobody else in the library, you can talk freely."

Danny waited for a moment and Clara finally shuffled so she was sat slightly more upright, "things are complicated at home. My Dad isn't coping well with my Mum's death and, evidently, not coping with me either. I just told him exactly how I feel and… I really wish I hadn't. Things are going to be so awkward at home now, I don't really know what to do. He saw me fitting earlier and just… walked away. If that happens at home…" she sounded scared, Danny just wanted to hold her and make her feel better, but that had been out of the picture since their conversation back towards the beginning of term.

"You don't live far from me, we established that already," Danny told her. "Give me your phone a sec," he said and Clara did so. He pulled up his contact and typed in his address. "I'm not going anywhere this week, anytime you need to talk in person, you can come over. If you need to call you can call, but my door is open - so to speak. I know what you said before, I respect that, but we can still be friends right?" Clara nodded a little, "good. And if you feel a fit coming on and you're scared of what might happen, just text me. One word, that's all you need to do, and I'll sort it. I promise." Danny told her. "For now you should probably get back, even if you don't think your Dad cares - I know other people do."

Clara smiled a little, taking her phone back from him and standing up, "thank you, it means a lot. I'll see how things go I guess... " Danny nodded, he didn't expect her to actually come round given how she felt about things between them, but he knew that just knowing someone cared was important for her. "Have a good week," she finished before walking out of the room.

#-#-#-#

When Clara got home she went straight up to her room. Her Dad had already dropped her Gran home and she wasn't in any mood to talk to him right now, and he was hardly making the effort in return. She quickly went over to her bookshelf and picked out a Jane Austen to read - she regretted not having taken these with her.

Settled on her bed and reading she felt a little more relaxed, she could lose herself in the world of another person's imagination. She'd got about 100 pages in when her phone vibrated on the bed beside her.

How you doing? Xx

She knew it was Faye before she'd even picked up the phone. Her friends really cared, she was grateful for that.

Fine. Home and reading, you okay? Xx

Clara put her book down for a moment, realising the time and that she was actually quite hungry.

Course. Just heading out for dinner. Are things okay with your Dad now? Xx

Clara typed out a message explaining what had happened… but she couldn't send it. It wasn't for Faye to be worrying about, not when they were on holiday.

Yeah all sorted. I'll be fine so stop worrying! Enjoy your dinner xx

There was no reply after that so she clearly got the message. Clara stood up from her bed and opened the bedroom door. She stood just outside the room for a moment but there was no sound coming from the house. Slowly she made her way downstairs, peaking in her dad's bedroom on the way to make sure he wasn't in there. He wasn't downstairs either, she checked every room but there was no sign. This wasn't a huge surprise, she'd got used to it before, but this time it seemed like he didn't have any food in the house either. Clara sighed, sometimes she wondered how he coped without her around and this was a good example. She didn't know what to do now, he probably wouldn't be back till late. She tried phoning him but, unsurprisingly, there was no answer. Day 1 of the holiday was hardly going to plan.

Scrolling through her contacts she suddenly landed on one that made her stop and think. She opened up Danny's name and saw the address he'd typed in. She couldn't go round, she didn't know who would be there, even thinking about it made her heart rate rise, but… she could…. She dialled the number, taking a deep breath and waiting for an answer. It didn't take long.

"Clara, hey, are you alright?" Danny sounded like he was moving around a bit, maybe unpacking.

"Have you got home yet?" she asked straight off.

"Yes, yeah I got home a couple of hours ago. Is everything okay? Your breathing sounds a little fast…" Danny sat down on his bed now to listen.

"Phone calls aren't my strongest thing… I just don't really know what to do, My Dad has gone out and I don't know when he'll be back but there's no food in the house and I have to eat for my meds…" she suddenly realised she'd just sprung this all on him, "sorry, sorry I didn't mean to throw that at you."

"No don't be silly, why don't you text me your address? I'll bring some stuff now. I know you won't want to come to a new place when you're anxious," Danny told her calmly.

"No you don't have to-" she started, but Danny stopped her.

"I'll be round as soon as I can," he hung up before she could argue. Clara text him her address and sat back on the windowsill, staring out and trying to figure out why she'd called him.