Disclaimer: I do not own Heartland, nor any of the characters, give credit to those who deserve it.

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I apologise, this took way longer then I intended. But it's school holidays for the kids, I'm sick and I would so much rather be in bed. But here is chapter 8.
I admit it isn't perfect but it'll do. I need sleep.
I hope you enjoy it. Chapter 9 will be out as soon as I feel better!

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Chapter Eight

"Daddy." Lou whispered as if she was making a forbidden call and she wondered if she was in a sense, because she wasn't sure if her grandfather would ever be okay with Tim returning to Heartland but she needed him. "Daddy..."

"I'm here. I'm here, Lou, you've been crying. What's happened?"

Lou sniffled, using her sleeve to wipe her eyes. "She knows, Amy knows the truth."

Tim took a sharp breath, he had expected that Lou would tell her, especially now that Marion was dead but he did not expect it to be so soon. "Is...are you okay?"

"I need you." And she did, she needed the person who backed her, the one who knew every piece of the truth. Lou need her father.

"I'll be on the next flight." Tim stood up, if Lou needed him then he'd be there. "I'll...Georgie..." He looked down the hall to where his granddaughter was playing. "What should I..."

Lou bit her bottom lip, a million emotions hitting her at the one time. She needed her father, she needed someone to back her up and hug her when she cried but she also knew that Georgie could not be around. She couldn't hear about what happened, she couldn't see her mother in tears. It wouldn't do the seven year old any good, it would only sadden her. "I...you need to stay there. Georgie can't...Daddy, what am I going to do?"

Tim could hear her voice cracking, she was on the verge of crying. "Hey, listen to me kid. You're incredibly strong, but it's okay Lou, it's okay to cry, to let that emotion out."

"I'm so tired of crying. I've got to pull it together."

"No." Tim disagreed. "You need to let it out, this is going to take time, Lou. A lot of time. Amy will be in a world of turmoil, but so are you. Your Grampa..."

"He stayed with me, dad, he chose to stay instead of chasing after Amy."

Tim felt the relief flow through his body but at the same time he knew it would have been hard on Jack's behalf. To have to chose between the two girls. "You need to tell him, explain it to him. Lou, he doesn't know the half of it. He needs the truth."

Lou closed her eyes, drawing in a deep breath to keep herself from breaking down again. "I don't want to taint her to his eyes. The problems mom had with me, they are..."

"Don't. Don't say they are your fault. They aren't." He told her firmly, as he had told her a million times before. "You cannot keep this to yourself Lou. He deserves to know, and you deserve to be treated better. The truth is just part of the healing process. So you tell him. Alright?"

Lou sighed, listening to the sound of her grandfather making her a mug of coffee. "Alright, dad."

"And if you need me, then I'll be on the next flight. I promise." He paused, as if taking a moment to collect himself. "You're the bravest woman I have ever had the privilege of knowing and I know this is hard, kiddo, emotionally hard but this needed to happen. This secret has need to come out for a long time. I'm just sorry that I never made good on my promise."

"You tried all you could, dad, you fought for me that is more then anyone else has ever done. I love you."

"I love you too, sweetheart. Talk to your Grampa."

"I will." She promised because she knew he was right, her Grampa needed to know the truth.

"Your dad?"

Lou glanced up to just as her Grampa entered the room, hanging up the phone in her hand and throwing it on the sofa beside her. "Yeah." She glanced over at the kitchen, towards the front door. "You should be with her." While her tears had finally stopped flowing, her heart was still heavy with sadness and her mind was still full with thoughts of Amy and what she was going through. She wondered why her grandfather was with her, and not with Amy, surely he would have rathered to comfort her. God, she had begged and wished multiple times for him to hug her, to just be with her and now she was wishing he would just go and be with Amy.
Lou didn't want to seem ungrateful, because she was incredibly thankful that for once he had chosen her but he also understood that it was Amy's world that was falling apart. She was the one losing her identity, she needed him more.

Jack passed the mug of coffee to her. "She's over at the yard." He didn't add that she was over there with Spartan, the horse Marion died saving. He thought it was a strange time to visit the horse but he let it go. Perhaps it was Amy's way of coping, she'd always used animals as a way to combat her emotions. "I'll talk with Amy in a little." He didn't say it but he needed this, to be with her, to support her. When Lou had needed him most he wasn't there, this was his chance to show her that he could be. To show her that he still cared for her, that he always loved her.

Lou stared into her mug of coffee, her knees pulled up go her chest. "She is going to hate me, and she has every right too. I never should have come back, I've destroyed her entire world."

"God no, no Lou." Jack sat down on the sofa beside her, shaking his head. The worst thing she could have done was stayed away, he needed her here. "You didn't destroy Amy's life, all of this," He waved his hand in the air. "Is because you love her. You let your mother raise her even..."

"No Grampa." Lou whispered, cutting him off. "I didn't let...I didn't let mom do anything." She breathed deeply, not at all surprised that he thought this way. He had come and gone during those years, and when he was at home she was kept busy with school and chores, told to stay out of the way. But the biggest thing was, she had never told him the truth because of that threat.

"You are just a child Lou, a stupid irresponsible girl. Do you think he would believe you, of course he wouldn't. It would just push him further away from you."

"Do you want a spankin'? 14 is not to old, I'll give you one. You keep your mouth shut, your Grampa doesn't need the stress of your lies. You knew giving Amy to me was the right thing to do, Samantha. Say it. Say it was the right thing to do!"

"Do not mention a word of this to your Grampa, or believe me I'll send you to boarding school for the next four years. You won't see Amy. Understood?"

It was that last threat that kept her silenced, after all her mom didn't want her grandfather to find out what she was doing. Jack still thought of his daughter as a wonderful human being, one that could do no wrong. She didn't want to ruin the image he had but it was time for him to know. "No, Grampa, mom wasn't trying to help me. She took Amy for her own selfish reasons."

"Now Lou..."

"No!" Lou stopped him, her glare giving off some sort of sternness because she needed him to listen, to hear her tell the truth. Short of repeating the rape because he didn't need to hear that part. "You need to hear my side Grampa, you need to know how she ripped Amy away because she was driven mad by hatred for me and jealously that I was able to have children." She saw confusion his eyes, and it was understandable, he'd been fed so many lies just like Amy. "Mom blamed me for her inability to conceive more children, and when I um," She paused, taking a moment to just collect herself. "Got pregnant, she changed. She'd never been overly warm and loving. You know that don't you?"

Jack cleared his throat. "She was a hard woman to please some times, but she loved you, I saw it in her eyes the day she told me she was pregnant."

Lou nodded slowly, she didn't doubt that her mother had probably loved her then but she certainly changed after the birth. "I think she did love me then, but my birth was difficult. You know that. I don't think she told you that it was the reason she couldn't conceive again, she blamed me for that."

"Oh Lou, that wasn't your fault." His eyes flickered over to the picture of his daughter on the mantle. "I just don't understand...why would she..."

"I know it wasn't my fault, Grampa, I know it now but I was just a kid. It was a lot to process. When I fell pregnant, it was as if she became jealous and bitter, and obsessive over the baby. My baby." She felt the tears spring to her eyes, and she closed them, her head down. "She took Amy, she raised her because Mom believed I owed her. That my child was some sort of redemption I had to pay."

Jack placed a hand over his mouth, a small sob escaping his lips. That was not his daughter, Marion never would have done something so horrific to her daughter, not the Marion he raised. "No, Lou, no." But the words weren't spoken as if he didn't believe her, they were spoken in denial. Denial that his daughter would do something like this.

"I know it's hard to believe but it's why mom and dad fought after the birth of Amy. It's why mom wouldn't let me near her. It's why I had to leave, because it was physically ripping me apart to be so close to my daughter but so far." She felt her bottom lip quiver but she pulled it between her teeth and willed any emotion back, seeling herself. She'd cried enough tears, this was her story and she had to own it. "I tried to tell you, but she threatened to take Amy away, or to send me to boarding school."

Jack's hands trembled. "You left..."

"Because I was broken. I still am, but at least now I'm stronger. I won't let the fear I felt for mom rule over me, I can't anymore." She reached out her hand to take his. "I'm strong Grampa, but I need you and I...I need my baby. I need her not to hate me."

Jack felt as if his heart was breaking and when he looked up and into his granddaughters eyes, he saw the 14 year old all over again. The crying, the tears, the a shadow of who she had been prior. He had missed it all, and while it had been partly Marion's fault, he also blamed himself. This woman before him was his world when she saw younger, how could he not have seen it. "I'm sorry. I'm so sorry, Lou." His voice cracked, and the tears flowed, his sobs racking his body. "I'm sorry, my god, I should have known." He held her hand tightly in his, wishing to pull her into his arms and hold her tightly. "I didn't know. I should have known." He cried for her, without realising this was the first time in days she wasn't crying for herself.

Lou discarded her mug, gently shifting on the couch so that she could wrap her arms around him. Hearing him gasp at the sudden contact. "You didn't know. It's okay. It's okay." She attempted to sooth him.
She felt that emotion swirling within her stomach, the need to cry but she wouldn't. She'd shed enough tears in the last few days, what she needed now was to help him to understand. So that he would then help Amy to understand. Maybe then her daughter wouldn't hate her, at least not forever.

….

Jack laid on his bed, a photo of Lyndy clutched in his hands. Sobs racked his body, eyes shut tightly though the tears still ran down his cheeks.
For years they had prayed to have a child, had tried countless times before the doctor told them it was impossible. He would never forget the look on Lyndy's face that day, the devastation that her dream of being a mother would never be fulfilled. It had broken his heart, crushed it. The thought of his beloved never having that missing piece. Until...Until the impossible happened. Their miracle baby.

Marion.

Jack had thought he had done a good job at raising his daughter, she was loving, kind person. Gave him barely any trouble until she brought home Tim. But it had all been a lie.
He hadn't done a good job, in fact, somewhere along the line he must have done something detrimental. The more he thought of everything, the more he thought it was his fault.

Whatever he had missed in those years had led to Lou and to Amy's devastation, because even through her trauma, the daughter he raised would have loved the baby she had, not blamed her. And now he didn't know how to help the girls, how to fix what Marion had done. He felt lost.

"What do I do Lyndy?" He sobbed, hugging the photo to his chest. "How do I mend them?"

This wasn't him, the only other time he had laid in his bed and sobbed like this was when he lost Lyndy. This time it was because he'd failed her, he'd failed Marion, and most importantly he had failed the two emotionally tormented girls under his roof.

"I messed up, Lyndy. I failed you. I didn't see it, I didn't protect our family." His words were mumbled among the tears. "I'm so sorry, my darling. I wish you were here. I need...I need your help." He opened his eyes, the wetness and tears making it hard to see. "I need your guidance. How do I fix what Marion broke?"

...

Amy stood in the doorway, she could hear the sobs coming from the room down the hall, her Grandfathers room but she felt no sympathy for him. He'd lied to her, he'd taken her whole life and moulded her into a person she might not have been if she knew the truth. Amy was angry with him but there was also no one she felt more angry with then the person sleeping in the bed just a few feet from her.
In the dimly lit room she could see that Lou had obviously been crying, and she wondered if the older woman felt as emotionally drained as she did, tired because of all the tears she had cried.

Even though she felt this utter intense anger at Lou, she also felt an emotion she couldn't quiet place. It was why she stood in that spot, feet freezing against the wooden floor.

This was the person she had craved to meet when she was younger, when then had changed to hatred for the woman who took her father away. Except he was never her father.

Everything she ever believed was a lie and in the middle of the darkness she found herself looking for some sense of resemblance, for a sense of identity in a stranger. A key to who she truly was but all she saw were opposites. Amy found herself wondering who she looked like, because she knew she didn't look like Lou.
Feeling the tear slip down her cheek, she quickly wiped it away. Taking a hesitant step inside the room, she leaned against the wall and slipped down till her bottom touched the floor, her line of sight never waving from Lou's face.

This woman was the cause of everything, yet the one who held the most answers.

The one who could tell her who she was, who she could have been.

Amy just sat there on the floor, tears trailing down her cheeks looking at the woman who abandoned her. Her real mother.

"Who am I Lou? Why did you abandon me? What...What happened...Why didn't you want me?" Amy whispered, leaning her head down on her knees. "Did you ever love me, Lou? Did you?"

Thoughts?

I do hope to have a better chapter for you out next time.

Much Love. x