The project was going well, they managed to keep up the pretense to everyone else while working well on it as much as they could. They were doing well, albeit it could have been going faster but there was a line and they had to keep behind it. When they had their progress meeting they played it out well, despite the Mr Fraser doing his best to try and get them to make up. At least he was impressed with the work, even if they did get a lecture for not doing enough. They were counting down the weeks until half term, but it was taking a while.
Clara hadn't had the best day for various reasons and she had made her way to her spare room at the end of the day and sat on the bed. She text Jess and Faye and told them she needed a bit of time, lying back and staring at the ceiling. A few minutes later she looked up and saw Danny coming in, she smiled at the fact that Jess and Faye had obviously hunted him down again. He walked over and sat down beside her, "talk to me?"
"I'm okay, just a difficult day," she sighed and moved to rest against him. "It's a year tomorrow," she told him and Danny nodded, quickly realising what she meant.
"Clara…" he took her hand. "It'll be okay, she'd be so proud of you."
Clara nodded and sat up, "I know, she wouldn't want me to be upset either so I am trying not to be."
"You do whatever you need, I'll be around as much as I can," he told her.
"I know, I-" their conversation was broken and both their heads shot up as the door opened.
"Clara I-" Paula stopped as she took in the scene in front of her. "I know I said you should be friends but this isn't quite what I had in mind…"
"It's not what it looks like. Well, it kinda is but I mean, there's more to it," Clara told her, "I should probably explain."
"You should, but not right now, I need to talk to you," she told her, "alone."
Clara quickly picked up her tone of voice and facial expressions, "no, Danny can stay," she grabbed his hand nervously. "What's happened?" The very fact Paula wasn't arguing over Danny told her it was serious.
"Your Dad's had an accident, the hospital just phoned," she told her. Clara shook her head in denial, "drunk driver hit his car on the motorway. He's alive and awake, but quite badly injured. I'll take you in now."
Clara kept shaking her head, her breathing rate increasing. Danny instinctively slipped an arm around her and she leant into him, tears escaping. He rubbed her back, whispering to her to calm her down. The more stressed she got the more chance there was of her having an attack and that was the last thing she needed. "Come on, you need to go and see him and I know you can be strong for him," he told her. "Deep breaths."
Paula watched on, she briefly considered intervening but when she saw how quickly Danny calmed her down she stayed back. "Can Danny come?" Clara looked up, "I know this all makes no sense to you, but I can't go into that now, please. Dad already knows."
"Alright, fine, but we will discuss this later," she shrugged in confusion, "I'll meet you at my car in 5 minutes." Paula left the room. Danny pulled Clara a little closer and kissed her head.
"Everyone's gonna find out," she suddenly panicked.
"Hey, that is not our major concern right now. Go and get your coat, I'll see you at the car. One step at a time okay? We will deal with Paula after we know your Dad is okay."
When they arrived at the hospital Clara ran in and straight through to resus, knowing he would be there. "Clara," Greg spotted her and went over, "how are you feeling?"
"Fantastic," she replied, rolling her eyes.
"Still sarcastic, that's a good sign to me. Now listen, your Dad is awake and talking, but he's got a few fractures and he's going to be in hospital for awhile," he explained. "You can go and see him, we'll be taking him up to the ward soon." Clara nodded and walked over. Greg greeted Danny and let them go over. Greg stood back with Paula, watching them. "I've never seen someone so dedicated, especially when you consider their age."
Paula looked to him, "wait you know about them as well?"
"Ah - this is news to you evidently," Greg replied. "I took a little persuading too don't worry, especially with that Jackie girl in the picture, but they make it work and in some weird way it does make sense. He gets Clara, don't jump to conclusions about them."
"It's just a bit of a shock to be honest, I thought they hated each other," Paula was still completely confused if she was honest.
"Almost BAFTA worthy, you'll feel a fool once they've told you everything I assure you," he chuckled and walked over to check everything.
Dave was quick to reassure her that he would be alright, "you just keep working hard and making me proud, that's the best thing you can do for me."
"On one condition, you get better," she smiled, trying to keep strong. "Just because Gran and I had our turns doesn't mean you needed one too."
"I just felt left out," he smiled. "Morphine is a wonderful thing isn't it?"
Clara rolled her eyes, "I can't believe my Dad is high."
"I love you sweetheart," Dave replied.
"Love you too Dad," she smiled. "I'm just glad you're okay."
"You know me, always fighting, I might have 3 broken limbs and some slightly screwed up insides but there are more important things - like you," he reached for her hand with his one reasonably good arm. "I'm so proud of you."
Clara blushed a little, "alright Dad I think you've had enough drugs now." She looked up when she noticed the porters arriving, "I think you're going on a little journey upstairs. I'll follow soon."
They wheeled him off and Clara stood back with Danny, Paula walking over to her. "You okay? You handled that really well."
Clara nodded, "you think? He looks so… frail. He's acting like it's all okay but I saw his notes and some of those injuries are really serious," she sighed.
"He's in the best place," Danny told her, "they'll look after him here."
"He's going to be here a long time, he'll need physio and rehab and multiple surgeries with long recovery times and with nobody at home able to help he won't be allowed home inbetween. They won't let me help because of my history so he's going to be stuck here," it was all starting to piece together in her mind and Danny immediately spotted the signs of her panicking.
"Clara, look at me," he spoke strongly but without shouting. "None of this is your fault, okay? And everything that is wrong can be reversed. He might be here for a while, but it's for the best. Even if you didn't have medical problems you're too young to be caring for your Dad, you need to be at school. You have Paula and Jess and Faye and me, we'll all be there for you. You'll be able to visit too and Hayley and Greg will keep you updated I'm sure. Just keep calm, your Dad needs you to do that," he looked her right in the eyes and got her to breathe with him to settle. "Better?" Clara nodded. Danny stood up and looked to Paula, "sorry Miss."
"No, um, no it's fine. Clara why don't you go up with the nurse - Greg was it? He said he'd take you. I think Danny and I need to have a chat if that's okay?" Clara looked up to Danny who smiled reassuringly and let her go, knowing she'd be fine with someone she knew. "Come with me." Paula led Danny to a room just down the corridor, a far too familiar room. "I need to know what is happening but Clara has enough to worry about right now."
They sat down and Danny nodded, "she's panicking about what's going to happen now you know,"
"Well I can't answer that until I know more details," Paula replied honestly.
"I know," he looked down, "I know it looks bad. It is bad I guess, but it makes sense. I don't know where to start…" he sighed.
"How long?" Paula asked. That was probably a good starting place.
"The first half term after Clara started. I mean we talked before that too, she helped with some of my maths and then we spent a bit of time together and then… it just happened I guess. I can't say exactly when, it just did." Danny explained as best he could, but he had to admit he too was a little nervous.
"What exactly is 'it'?" she asked.
"Whatever you want to call it. Going out, boyfriend and girlfriend, bla bla bla. We haven't labelled it Miss, it just is. I love Clara," he admitted, "I know we're only teenagers, believe me we've been reminded of that more often than we would care for, but this isn't just some stupid kid thing," he didn't know how to explain it, it worked better with the two of them but Clara didn't need this right now.
"So why are you still with Jackie? This isn't something I should be condoning in any way," Paula told him seriously.
"I know, but can you imagine what would happen if this got out? Clara's just getting back to normality and now this with her Dad… there's never a right time. It's not fair, not on her or us, but it's the best way. Jackie and I, it's all just- an act. Always has been really, we were just expected to be together, so we were. I don't feel anything for her. Maybe we were friends once, but I don't agree with how she acts. Clara helped me see how much she was holding me back and I've changed that, but for both our sakes right now I'm just sticking at it," Danny looked up, "please, you can't tell anyone, you can't do that to Clara."
Paula looked at the boy sat in front of her and suddenly realised how much she had misjudged him. The care and maturity in his eyes said more than his actions over the previous couple of years ever had. "Alright, for now I keep quiet, but we will talk more. Who else knows about you two?"
"My parents, Clara's Dad and Gran, Jess, Faye and Hayley and Greg here," he told her. "Speak to any of them, they all understand," Danny offered, "can I go and make sure she's okay now?" Paula nodded and he quickly rushed up and out of the room.
"Trying to get your head around it huh?" Hayley was stood at the door, "we met before - Paula right? I'm Dr Fallows, Hayley."
"Right yeah," Paula nodded, "it's quite a bit to take in. I spend a lot of time with Clara and I had no idea."
"She's good," Hayley smiled and walked in, handing Paula a cup of tea she'd come prepared with. "Thought you might need someone to talk to."
"It's not my Dad in hospital," Paula pointed out.
"No, but you're Clara's support at school and I don't want you to jump to the wrong conclusions about her. Excuse me for going defensive, but she's been through enough," Hayley sat down opposite her.
Paula nodded, "I think I'm so used to immature teenagers that dealing with someone so grown up and mature for their age is almost a challenge."
"I understand, it took me awhile to get used to Clara. You're constantly alert for signs of her attacks but at the same time you have to remember that underneath that is a girl that learnt to grow up very quickly when her mother got sick," she explained.
"You dealt with her Mum a lot?" Paula asked.
"Pretty much every time she came in I was here. That's how I got to know Clara. When I first met her she was just a young girl like any young girl. By the time her Mum died if she didn't look so young you'd probably have believed she was 18. She had to learn to look after herself and her Mum and then after she died she was pretty much looking after her Dad too. It's nice to see her being able to be young again, but she's always going to have a more mature outlook on things."
"I think I'm learning that," Paula replied, "so this thing with Danny…"
"Should be treated based on what you know about Clara. As for Danny, Clara trusts him and she doesn't trust many people. He seems to know her better than anyone in just that short period - that's special," Hayley told her and stood up. "Sorry I need to get back."
"That's alright, thank you - that really helped," Paula nodded and let her go.
#-#-#-#
Her Dad had gone to theatre but Clara didn't want to leave. It was beginning to get later and she was tired which Danny had spotted. They sat in the chair in his currently empty room and Clara leant back against him, but she couldn't sleep. "You're restless," Danny rubbed her arm, "try and relax you don't want to be getting worked up."
"I know, I'm trying," she sighed. "Can we look at project stuff?"
"It's all back at school love," he pointed out.
"You reckon?" Clara replied, reaching for her bag.
"Ah of course you carry work everywhere," he chuckled. "Come on then."
They both stood up and moved to sit on the floor so they could spread work out a little to look at it. It didn't take long for the work to start helping as a distraction for Clara and they got going. A few moments later the door opened and Paula walked in to find them on the floor, Clara vaguely leant against Danny as they were brainstorming ideas between them. "Have to say this is not what I expected to see."
"Better than sitting around," Clara shrugged. "Plus we have a lot to catch up on."
"You're not wrong, how is everything going with your Dad?" Paula asked, sitting down on the chair they had earlier been occupying.
Clara looked to Danny to reply for her. Everytime she tried to talk about it her brain clammed up and she could feel herself begin to stress too much.
"He's in theatre, they're doing the internal injuries first - they think he's losing quite a lot of blood. It's gonna be a little while," Danny explained. "Clara's struggling to process it."
Paula nodded and moved down to the floor by Clara, "are you coping being here?"
"I don't want to leave, I need to be here for when he comes out," she replied honestly.
"I know, but we could just get out for a little while if the operation is going to take some time?" Paula suggested.
Danny spoke up now, "why don't you go with Paula and get some air, I'll wait here and if your Dad comes out I'll call you straight away, promise." Clara considered this, she could really do with the fresh air to clear her head.
"Okay, yeah," she stood up. "You can finish off that section," she smiled briefly at him.
"Cheeky sod," Danny rolled her eyes and chuckled, letting her go with Paula.
Clara followed her out and they made it outside. It was dark now, but surprisingly warm for the time of year which Clara was quite grateful for. They kept walking and Clara almost subconsciously led them to the peace garden, somewhere she hadn't been since her Mum died. "I was here when she died," she stopped at the entrance. "Hayley came out to find me. I'd not been here long. Gran reckons Mum didn't want me to see her go," Clara spoke quietly.
"Is that why you wanted to wait for your Dad?" Paula asked and Clara nodded. "Well Danny will call the moment he hears anything so you don't have to worry," she placed a hand on her shoulder, "why don't we have a sit down, it's lovely here." Clara took the step in and over to a bench, avoiding the one she'd been sat on a year previously. "I spoke to Hayley earlier, or rather she approached me."
Clara looked up at her in surprise, "what about?"
"You, Danny, your relationship. She set me straight on it all," Paula explained. "It makes a little more sense now."
"Really?" she asked, a little shocked. "But you're a teacher…"
"Yes, but you're not just a student Clara. You're very different, much more mature than any student I've worked with and I realise that. Seeing Danny with you today as well, it tells me a lot. Once I spoke to Danny as well I realised why you've kept this all quiet. I think we can find a way to go forward," Paula explained.
Clara lit up a little, "you're not going to make us tell everyone?"
"No, I'm not, but there have to be conditions," she explained. "I shouldn't be keeping this quiet, so I need to know that you're being sensible."
"In what wa- oh, oh! My gosh yes we are being sensible we haven't even thought about that geez," she blushed.
Paula chuckled at her reaction, "good to know. That's the most important thing, that cannot happen at school, you're both too young anyway. You have spent some nights together?"
Clara nodded, "when I've been really bad. Danny just knows how to calm me, I can't explain it, he just does."
"Yeah I've seen that today," Paula replied, "okay. Well you both need to be careful and it can't be daily."
"I know, thank you for this. Really, it means a lot. I wouldn't have survived at the school without your help," Clara spoke honestly. "It was the right thing for me, it still is."
"I agree, you're thriving with us. Even from where you started a few months ago you've changed a lot and that is definitely down to the people you've surrounded yourself with - Danny included - but Jess and Faye seem to have done a marvelous job too."
"I wouldn't still be here without them, I was really lucky to end up with two people who understand me," she smiled.
"You've had a pretty positive impact on them too you know? They've both grown up a lot - in a good way, they were a handful at times," Paula chuckled. Clara looked a little surpsied, "I know, you wouldn't know it now. I'm impressed with how well they've taken you in."
"They treat me like an equal, not like a stupid little kid - that's what I love. Everyone at my old school just treated me like an idiot as soon as they found out what happened, or they just gave me that sympathetic look all the time. Even my teachers didn't really try to understand, they just saw me as a problem. That's why I'm so grateful for everything I have now, it's made life so much easier," she smiled a little.
"That's what I like to hear, you deserve it. You're a clever girl Clara, cleverest in your year by far, you can do whatever you want to do and we are here to make sure that happens," Paula told her. Clara looked up at her, tears in her eyes. "Are you okay?"
"Yeah, Mum used to say that to me," Clara fought back the tears, "it was the last thing she said to me. That she wanted me to do whatever I wanted and that she'd always love me." Clara shook her head, "I'm sorry."
"Don't you ever be sorry, come here," Paula opened her arms and Clara immediately took advantage of the invitation. "The rules say I shouldn't do this, but you look like a girl that needs a hug."
"You observe right," Clara told her, hugging her back. Just as she sat back up her phone started ringing and she answered it possibly faster than ever before, "Danny?"
"Relax, it's all gone well. Your Dad is just about to come out of theatre - they said it went well," he told her.
Clara breathed a sigh of relief, not even having realised she'd been holding her breath the whole time he was talking. "Thank you, I'll be up soon," she hung up. "He's out, he's okay."
"Excellent, let's go back up then," Paula stood up and they walked back.
#-#-#-#
She had refused to leave her Dad's side all night. Danny had to return back to the school and Paula went with him to get some rest with the promise of the nursing staff that they would look after Clara. When she woke up in the chair sat by his bed the next morning she noticed Hayley stood in the corner. She looked serious.
"What's wrong? Is Dad okay?" Clara suddenly panicked as she woke up and considered the situation, immediately grabbing her Dad's bedside notes. Hayley quickly moved over and took them back from her.
"You know you don't want to do that," she put the folder back in it's holder, "your Dad is doing okay, but his team had a discussion last night after his surgery and he's going to need a further abdominal operation as well as the ops for his fractures. He's going to be in hospital for longer than they thought," Hayley explained.
"Okay, well they need to look after him that's what he needs," Clara replied, but Hayley still had a look about her. "There's something else?"
"They've called social services in," Hayley told her. "Your Dad will be in hospital over your half term and possibly even Christmas breaks. Your Dad is your only carer and given your Gran's situation they don't feel she is a suitable carer for such an extended period."
"But I'm at school most of the time?" Clara replied her voice breaking a little.
"Unfortunately they can't take that into consideration, you would still need a parent or guardian at home. If anything was to happen, there needs to be somewhere for you to go," she explained. "I'm sorry, I know this won't be easy for you but I'm here to support you all the way."
Clara didn't know how to react, she brought her knees up to her chest and stared at the wall. Hayley walked over and crouched down in front of her. "Where will I go?" Clara asked.
"I don't know that. They'll consider any family, then look at emergency foster placements, and if that isn't an option they'll try care homes. Just remember, whatever happens you'll still have school and us, and it won't be forever." Hayley put a hand on her knee, "I'll be right here when they talk to you okay? It's all going to be fine."
"Thank you," she whispered, "when is Paula coming back?"
"I'm here," Clara looked up to see she had just walked in, "they've explained. How are you doing?" Clara shrugged, but didn't reply as she noticed movement from her Dad.
"Dad?" she stood up and took his hand, "it's okay, I'm here."
Dave's eyes opened slowly and he looked around, smiling as soon as he saw Clara, "my beautiful girl. Are you okay?"
"I'm okay, how do you feel?" Clara replied.
"I've been better, but I'll live. Are you really okay?" he asked again.
Clara sighed, he knew he too well, "they're gonna put me into care while you're in, they say you might not even be out for Christmas."
"No, they can't do that!" he looked around and spotted Hayley, "how is this fair? This is Clara, you know she struggled with new people and new situations!"
"Mr Oswald I really need you to calm down for your own health," Hayley replied, "we don't have a choice. If I could take her myself then I would, but I'm afraid it's not that simple. I'm not going to let them make any decisions without my involvement though, that I can promise you."
"Dad please don't worry about it, Hayley and Paula will look after me. I need you to focus on getting better," she tried to put on a reassuring smile, but inside she was shaking.