When they got back Hayley and Greg had already arrived. Clara ran over and hugged them smiling now she felt a little better. Hey you, how you getting on kid?" Greg asked her, smiling back at her. "You're looking a little brighter?"
"I'm getting there, I remembered some better stuff - reminded me it's not all bad," she smiled.
"Yeah well, I need to check your body is alright with is all. Is that okay?" Hayley checked. Clara nodded and went over to sit on the sofa with her, actually beginning to tire slightly now she was back home. The doorbell rang just as she sat down and Clara immediately went to stand up.
Danny stopped her, "no no it's for me you stay there," he smiled and went to the door, opening it. "Mum you're a star, thank you so much."
"I didn't know how many people would be here but I did plenty," she put the bag down. "How you doing?"
"Good, better now Clara is doing better. Don't worry about school either, her support teacher is making sure we get all the work we need," he explained.
"Oh I know you'll be sensible, but look after yourself right?" he checked.
"Right, on it. Did you want to stay for dinner Mum?" Danny asked.
"No no the cafe is busy I'd better get back. Keep me updated okay?"
"Of course," he hugged her. "Bye Mum." He shut the door and picked up the bag again, walking through to the kitchen.
Grace spotted him and followed in. "What you got there?"
"Mum made dinner for us all," he replied, taking the pot out. "Wow she wasn't kidding when she said she did a lot. Do you want to see if Hayley and Greg want to stay? I can sort all this out you sit down." Grace smiled and nodded, leaving her be.
As he put the dinner in the oven he thought back to earlier times. Days when he would be cooking Clara dinner and she would sit on the tabletop, swinging her legs back and forth in her blue dress and teasing him about everything he was doing. Now he could just see through to the lounge where she was sat on the sofa looking increasingly worn out, resting against Hayley as her eyes drooped a little. Her hair had grown, now almost down to her elbows, not having been cut since they first met. She still looked beautiful, the little glint in her eye and the dimples in her cheeks - to him she was perfect whatever was going on. But they were young, too young for either of them to have any of this, but Danny couldn't just make it go away so he would keep on fighting for her.
Lost in thought he barely noticed anyone else entering the kitchen, "need a hand mate?" Greg asked, stunning Danny from his daydream state. "Ooo sorry you alright?"
"Yeah, all good. Sorry I just got lost in thought. Is Clara okay?" he checked.
"Tired, but physically fine. That's not why I'm in here though, how are you coping?" he checked.
Danny sighed, standing up from where he was leaning and checking on dinner. "I wish everyone would stop asking me that."
Everyone could see Danny was being wonderful, but Greg also knew he was probably not looking after himself properly. "We ask because we care. Now you might be able to fool Grace, your parents and even Clara but Hayley and I spend our days and nights looking after people and we know when something isn't right."
"Of course something isn't right, I can't stand looking at her so broken," Danny shrugged.
Shaking his head, Greg put a hand on Danny's shoulder to stop him. "You need to think about yourself as well. When was the last time you slept properly?" Danny went to answer but realised he needed to think. "I thought so. After dinner you should go home or back to school. If all goes to plan she'll be back tomorrow - I know she's desperate to get back to normal."
"Yeah, you're probably right," a sudden feeling of fatigue overwhelmed him as Greg spoke and Danny knew he couldn't argue anymore. "Thank you. I'll get this served up, could you grab everyone to the table?" Greg smiled and left the room.
Dinner was quite enjoyable, everyone in a relatively good mood just trying to make the atmosphere as normal as possible. When everyone had finished eating Hayley, Greg and Grace all disappeared into the kitchen to tidy and wash up leaving Clara with Danny. "You're quiet," Clara observed. "You're tired."
"I guess I am a bit. I'm gonna head back to school soon, but Hayley and Greg are gonna stay here with you. Is that alright? I can stay if-"
"Danny go. You've been doing so much for me you've not had any time for yourself and you deserve it. Get some rest, I'll be fine I promise you. Give Jess and Faye a hug from me and let me know how they are?" she asked.
They lent together, Danny's arm resting around her back and Clara rested on his shoulder, "of course I will. You get an early night, I can see you're worn out from everything today but you've done so well."
"I will, I want to go and see Dad first though - I need to thank him," she smiled softly, "I'm really very lucky."
"Lucky?" he questioned.
"Well obviously not in every way, but I could be going through this alone and I'm not, I've got the best support system a girl could ask for. I'd never have got through this without any of you," she looked up and kissed him. "I love you. Go back to school, I'll see you tomorrow. Don't worry about me."
Danny smiled and slicked her hair back behind her ear. "If you need me then call me."
"I just told you not to worry," Clara rolled her eyes and stood up. "Come on, get out."
Chuckling, Danny also stood up and nodded. "Alright I'm going I'm going, see you tomorrow." He left and once he'd gone Clara went into the kitchen, "can I do anything?"
"We're almost done love. How are you doing?" Grace asked.
"Okay, can we go and see Dad now?" she asked. "I need to thank him."
"I'm a little tired-" Grace started.
"I can take her up," Hayley smiled, "Greg can stay and provide an endless supply of tea as and when you need it."
Clara chuckled, "make the most Gran, he makes good tea." She hugged Grace, "we won't be long, I love you."
Grace rubbed her back gently, "I'm so proud of you sweetheart."
#-#-#-#
When they arrived at the hospital Clara practically ran up to her Dad's room, bursting in and immediately hugging him. "It worked Dad, I've started to remember so much."
"That's amazing sweetheart, I'm so pleased. You're so strong," he hugged her back, rubbing her hair. "I love you, I'm so proud of you."
"How are you doing Dad? What have they said?" she asked, looking him over.
"Good, the physio is going really well. I'll be out towards the end of the month if it keeps going well," he told her. "You look tired, you didn't need to come down here you know?"
"Of course I did, I needed to thank you properly. Besides, you will always give the best hugs," she smiled and stood back up finally. "You look tired too though, you're working yourself hard. We won't stay, I just really wanted to see you."
"You staying at home tonight?" he asked. Clara nodded, "stay as long as you need."
"No I'll go back to school tomorrow, I need to get back to normal. Thank you Dad, sleep well," she kissed his cheek and smiled, heading home.
#-#-#-#
Returning to school still felt weird. It was the one place she still didn't really remember very well, but after the experiences at home she realised it was the only way to get the memories back. She hadn't told Danny what time she was going back, instead she timed it to be during morning lessons so she could meet Paula in private and get back to her room.
Sitting on her bed did still feel a little strange, but somewhat familiar at the same time. Paula sat on the chair by her bed, "it went well then?"
"Yeah, it really worked. I just need to get everything here back - it's frustrating. I feel like I'm missing out on so much work too, I need to make sure I've got everything up to speed," she went to stand up but Paula stopped her.
"One step at a time. Clara you're the only student I know who could probably miss half a year of school and still ace her exams. We'll get things sorted for you, but let's focus on getting you settled back in first. How much do you feel you remember?" Paula asked as Clara settled back.
Everytime she tried to put memories together her head thumped a little so Clara had to give herself a moment to form an answer to that question. "I remember a lot about Danny and I. I remember some bits with Jackie, unfortunately. But I couldn't tell you the layout of the school or what lessons I have, and I don't really remember Jess and Faye…" she sighed. "How do I just forget my roommates?"
"They're your best friends, you'll remember them in time don't worry. How are you feeling now you're here?"
"Tired, it's a lot to take in. Like even with you… it's like I know I can trust you but I don't know why and that's a hard instinct to fight. I'm sorry," she pulled her knees up. "I don't want to let anyone down."
"You're not, honestly," Paula told her. "You've been missed kid, Jess and Faye haven't stopped asking me when you were coming back and they practically jumped on Danny when he got back yesterday," Clara opened her mouth to reply, "don't worry, he did get to rest. In fact he looked pretty fresh this morning when I checked in."
"Good, he needed a decent sleep," she replied.
"You're not wrong, but it's alright now," Paula smiled, "right, it's break time. You okay to stay here?"
"Yes, I want to see them," she smiled, "but can you stay?"
"Of course-" Paula didn't get any further when the door opened.
"You're back! Why didn't you text us?!" Jess ran over to her. Clara stood up and hugged them both. "Doesn't matter anyway, you're here. How are you feeling?"
"Fragile, but I'm getting there. Are you guys okay? I know it all got very stressful…"
"Shush you it's fine, we are all good. Watching Jackie squirm when we talked about Danny being with you was great," Faye grinned. "Oh wait, do you-"
"Yeah I remember Jackie. Well, yeah, kinda. I still don't remember you guys though, before everything anyway, I'm sorry it all feels so weird," she sighed. "I'm hoping it'll come back soon. Being at home stirred so many memories, I'm on a roll."
Chuckling, Jess and Faye sat down with her and started telling Clara about their days, deciding to keep things as normal as possible. She was grateful for a normal conversation and enjoyed listening to their stories about the last few days. Things started to sound familiar - teachers names, class details, but she still couldn't quite place them. "Sounds like you've had an entertaining few days anyway," Clara replied. "I'm glad you've enjoyed yourselves."
"Never the same without you," Jess smiled, "really missed you."
Clara smiled and sat back on the bed, "you guys have been my rock, I feel very lucky. And before you say it, I know I shouldn't feel lucky, but I do so no arguments. What lesson do you have next?"
"Science. We're in the same class for that so we can catch you up don't worry," Faye told her. "What's happening for you next?"
"Science by the sounds of it, I'm not coming back just to sit in another room. I'm ready to learn again," she smiled and stood up. "Come on, you'll have to show me the way because I haven't got a clue where I'm going."
#-#-#-#
Danny wasn't in the lesson. He was meant to be, but he wasn't and nobody seemed to know why. Faye and Jess sat either side of Clara instead. "We've gathered we don't know where Danny is but where is Paula?"
"In her office probably," Clara replied, carrying on with the work they were doing.
"Okay new question, where does she think you are?" Faye tried. "Clara you can't go hiding things from her again."
"I've hidden things before?" Clara looked up briefly, "hm, fair enough. Anyway she'll just tell me I should take things slow and all that jazz. I just want to get back into it, I need things to help me remember and being stuck in one room isn't going to work. Dad was right when he sent me back home - it was hard but it worked. I need to do the same here - however hard it might be."
That seemed to be accepted and they carried on for the rest of the lesson, at least until Paula came in 5 minutes to the end. Clara looked down a little but she came over, "we need to talk outside, bring your bag."
"Look I'm sorry for not telling you Miss but we're nearly done-" she started but Paula shook her head.
"It's not about that, let's talk outside," she told her and went for the door.
Packing up, Clara quickly followed her - now concerned about what was going on. "Is it Dad? Is he okay, did something happen?"
"Your Dad is fine as far as I'm aware. Just come with me, let's get out the way before everyone piles out of lessons."
Clara followed her through to her office and went inside, seeing Danny in there. "What's going on?" He looked pale and he'd yet to make eye contact with her. Clara could see something was wrong - she wanted to go to him but something told her she shouldn't just yet. "What's happened?"
"I screwed up," he spoke quietly before adding, "really badly."
"What do you mean, what's going on Danny you're scaring me," she stood at the door still holding her bag.
"I'm going to leave you both, but I'll be just outside," Paula placed a hand on Clara's shoulder briefly before leaving the room - she hoped they could work this out between them.
"After I got back yesterday I went outside to get some air. Jackie and everyone came out, including some of the guys - the ones that aren't my roomates you know? Well no maybe you don't but anyway-" Danny paused, taking a deep breath. "They were drinking. I didn't realise, it looked like water and I had some. I realised but… it was too late. I had a big gulp. I didn't have anymore but I've never drunk before so I guess it just went straight to my head." Clara gripped her bag a little tighter, his tone scaring her. "Before I knew it everyone else had gone except Jackie. I went to get up but I couldn't stand properly and she steadied me and we-" he looked down, unable to finish the sentence. "We kissed."
She stumbled back. Danny stood up to help but she used the door and held a hand up to stop him. "Why didn't you leave straight away?"
"I don't-"
"We're 14 why should I have to be worrying about your inability to stay away from your ex?!" she shouted.
"Clara I-"
"Shut up, don't say anymore I can't. I can't do this. There's too much, it's too much," she opened the door behind her and walked out backwards before running down the corridor. Paula tried to stop her but she ignored her and kept running.
Unable to keep up she turned back and went into her office where Danny was simply staring at the space where Clara had stood, tears in his eyes. "What happened?" No reply. "Danny, what happened?" she sighed. "Stay here. Your parents will be here soon. Did you even tell her you were being excluded until half term?"
"Didn't get to that part…" he put his head in his hands. "I can't go after her she won't react well. She's fragile Miss, god what have I done?" he suddenly kicked out at a nearby chair in anger and Paula had to go over. "You need to go, she needs support."
Paula looked at the door again, she wasn't really meant to be leaving Danny alone until his parents arrived. "Right. I'm going after her but you don't move, don't talk to anyone and call me if you hear anything alright?" Danny nodded. "I know this was a one off Danny, I know you won't do it again but rules are rules. I'll be as quick as I can."
She left him in the room and headed towards Clara's private room, knocking when she arrived. There was no answer, twice. Paula pulled out her keys and unlocked the door - empty. Of course, she was trying to avoid Danny so she wasn't going to go somewhere he would go first. Running her hands through her hair she turned and headed for her bedroom, on her way calling the ward her Dad was on to ask them to let her know if she turned up. Jess and Faye were in the room when she opened the door "oh, sorry girls thought you'd be in lesson."
"Jess forgot her textbook so we dived back… is something wrong?"
"Yeah I… no. Look if you see Clara can you tell me? She's upset and run off. I'm going to try outside," Paula left, shutting the door again.
Jess turned around and Clara came out from behind the wardrobe. "What has happened? Why are you so upset with Paula?" Jess asked. Clara had text her and Faye to come to the room and was about to explain when she heard Paula running down the hall.
"I-" Clara started but couldn't get anything out and just felt herself tearing up, shaking her head and sliding down the wall to the floor. Both her friends knelt down in front of her immediately.
"Let me call Danny, he must be around somewhere…" Faye pulled out her phone but Clara grabbed it off her. "No? Is this something to do with him? Clara you need to try and calm down," she put a hand carefully on her knee. "Why don't you text me what happened if it's easier than talking?"
Clara took a deep breath and took her own phone out, handing Faye her own back. She started typing and both girls in front of her waited patiently until the message came through and Clara bought her knees back up to her chest.
Some of Danny's 'friends' gave him alcohol yesterday. Jackie cornered him. They kissed.
"What?!" Jess replied a little louder than she intended, making Clara jump. "I'm sorry love, I'm so sorry, but what possessed him?!"
"I don't know. I feel like I barely know him still, I don't know how I'm meant to react, but I don't want to see him right now and Paula will make me go back and listen to him. I can't, I can't do it," she let her friends try to comfort her. "I don't even know why I'm so upset because I can't piece anything together. Nothing makes any sense. I just… I need to be alone. I'm sorry, I know I told you to come here but I need to be alone."
"Clara I don't know if we should-" Faye didn't finish the sentence as Clara stood up and walked over to her bed, lying down on it. "Okay I'm sorry, we will go but promise you'll stay here? Don't do anything stupid…"
She sat up again. "I won't, but I'm going to go to my room so I can lock the door. I'm sorry, I don't want you to worry about me, I just can't get my head around all this."
#-#-#-#
Danny went home. His parents were angry, but they took him home and told him he would be working in the cafe until he returned to school after the holidays. They wanted to see Clara, but Paula informed them she wasn't seeing anyone. Faye and Jess had told her where she was but they all agreed to leave her for a while. She stayed in there all day, only coming out to eat but she didn't speak to anyone.
The next day Clara went to lessons, but still didn't speak to someone and completely ignored Paula despite her best efforts. Jess and Faye tried to look out for her and she did respond to them a little more, but she barely came to their room. All 3 of them had told her Danny had been excluded but she didn't react at all.
The week passed and they reached Saturday. Clara came into the canteen at breakfast as Jess and Faye were already sat at the table with their food. "Does she look in pain to you?" Jess asked the girl opposite, watching her walk across to collect her food.
"Yeah… not walking right is she? Has Jackie got to her?" Faye questioned but Jess disagreed.
"When would she have had the chance?"
"True. I guess we can ask Clara but I doubt she'll say anything," Faye sighed. "We need to get through to her," they both looked back at each other for a moment while Clara finished at the counter.
Only a few seconds later there seemed to be a commotion occurring and they both immediately stood up, running over. They pushed through the crowd and found Clara on the floor fitting. "Do you lot have no sympathy? Don't just stand there!" Jess crouched beside Clara and moved everything out of the way so she didn't injure herself. She looked up to Faye, "the pain and now this? She must have been missing her meds…"
Faye and Jess both paused as they realised but jumped back into action. "I'll go and get Paula," Faye immediately ran off. She ran into the office, not even knocking and told her what was happening. Paula jumped up and followed, quickly stopping off to grab the medication and see how many she'd missed, shaking her head when she realised there was a whole week still in there.
They reached Clara again. All the way down the hall Faye had been hoping she would be still when they returned but she was still fitting. Jess immediately told them she called the ambulance as soon as it got to 5 minutes. There were other teachers there now, everyone else had been sent out. Finally she began to settle after what seemed like forever.
"7 minutes," Jess announced after looking at her watch. She then moved closer now Clara was still, moving her hair out of her face. Paula joined her on the floor, "this is bad isn't it?"
Paula nodded, "I think it is yes." They weren't talking about the fit, not that that was good but it had happened before. Clara had knowingly stopped her medication for a week, almost like she wanted this to happen, like a silent cry for help or…
#-#-#-#
Dave met them in A&E, bought down in a chair by one of the nurses on his ward. Clara was taken into resus, still having not come round, and they waited outside. Dave had managed to get in contact with Hayley when he found out she wasn't on shift and not long after she ran by him and Paula into resus, pulling her jacket off as she went. "How did this happen?" Dave asked. "Sorry that sounded harsh just…"
"No I know, I should have been looking after her," she sighed. "Something happened with Danny, he upset her and she reacted badly. She didn't want anyone around, just kept herself to herself. I never imagined she'd stop taking her medication," she sighed. "I'm so sorry."
Dave shook his head, "don't blame yourself. Clara has and always will be her own person. She is very good at avoiding sharing her feelings to try and protect others and I'm sure that's no different whether she remembers you properly or not."
"I suspect that's half the problem here too - She doesn't remember Danny well enough to realise he will never repeat his actions from this week. I just can't get her to listen," she sighed but stood away from the door as one of the nurses came back through.
Both Dave and Paula looked at him expectantly. "She's stable, we expect she will come round shortly. You'll just need to stay out here for a few more moments. I'm going to ring the mental health team now."
He'd been holding the door partially open and Hayley clearly heard him, running out as soon as he mentioned it. "Nice going Phil, go do your job," she shook her head. "I'm sorry, I'd planned on telling you myself - properly. Clara needs more help than we can give her now, the memory loss has caused deeper problems than any of us first spotted, we want to try and get her a bed somewhere that can help her."
"You mean a mental hospital?" Dave asked. He seemed angry for a moment but then realised, "It's the best place isn't it?"
"Yes. I'll stay with her through the process as much as I can, they should let me travel over with her and-" she stopped and realised something. "Where's Danny?"