Hello lovelies,
I'm back!
I hope you are all keeping well, safe and sane in these crazy times.
Please enjoy this slice ofOpposites Attract.
malen'kiy means little one in Russian, at least that's what google translate says. Who can guess which Criminal Minds episode I talk about?
I can't wait to hear you feedback! Smoke signals, morse code, comments or kudos are all gladly taken.
Enjoy xx
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Sitting on Maria's sofa, Natasha waits for her new hair colour to develop. Netflix playing in the background while she idly flips through the different series, never quite settling on anything.
Natasha couldn't remember the last she just sat somewhere. It must have been back at the compound. Natasha misses her old Nokia phone, it was for all she knew still on a quinjet somewhere, somewhere, wherever Steve was.
Steve...she misses Steve. His steadfastness, his can -do - attitude...his smile. Natasha shaking her head angrily at herself 'Don't go there Romanoff, it won't help you.'
It had taken her over a week to make the journey to Paris. Natasha stayed with Laura and the kids, until Clint got word that someone had gotten him out. Natasha would bet all her Swiss bank accounts, that needed to thank a specific 'Man with a plan' for this.
Leaving them was never a question for her, she owed it to Clint to keep his family safe.
Watching Laura handling the kids trying to give them some sort of schedule and normalcy seems surreal to her, but was oddly soothing to her frazzled mind.
The quietness of Clint's safe house, the evenings with Laura on the sofa, cuddles with the kids balanced her in a way she wouldn't have thought possible.
Leaving them behind after Clint had send an encrypted message was one of the hardest things she ever did, but she needed to move.
A bounty was still on her head after all.
She had jumped countries quickly staying no longer, than it took her to make it to the next border. Natasha moved south from the US into Mexico and onto Cuba. Here an old contact managed to smuggle her into Europe.
Europe was always easy, the Schengen Agreement allowing free movement across several countries without a passport check, a fugitives dream.
Maria had been a godsend and Natasha let out an unusual display of emotion when her friend met her at the port in Lisbon. Now she was safely ensconced in Maria's Parisian flat.
Natasha hadn't dared to call Sarah, for all she knew Tony had given the government all her officially and unofficially known contacts. She would not drag her friend into this.
The back of her neck prickled, she could feel another presence in the flat. A quick glance at her watch, it was too early for Maria to be home. Taking a breath she relaxes her posture, trying to calculate the distance to the window and feeling for the knife stuck in the waistband of her yoga pants. She flips over the back of the couch when the footsteps come closer, knife poised of the collarbone of the intruder.
"Hey, it's just me." Maria holds up her hands "you're getting paranoid, Tasha."
Pushing out a forced breath, Natasha smirks "Say something next time."
"When I enter my own flat?"
Natasha flips back onto the sofa "if you're home earlier than usual, then yes!"
"I had a visitor today." Maria's heels clicked on the wooden floor as she makes her way to her bar cart, pouring two glasses of vodka.
Natasha raises an eyebrow "it's not even five yet."
"It's five o'clock somewhere in the world." Maria sits down on the sofa "you might need it, once you read this." Handing Natasha an unmarked file.
Nat looks at her friend carefully, befor opening the file.
No expression crosses over her face, but Natasha downs the vodka after reading the first two lines.
Maria was ready with the bottle for a refill, Natasha would need it. Curling one leg underneath her Natasha disregards the file and downs her fourth glass of vodka.
"Where did you get this."
"Someone from Berlin dropped it off today."
"Carter."
Maria nods.
"Is she still here?"
"You want to talk to her?" Of course she would, Maria should have taken that bet with Carter earlier on, she'd be €100 richer by now.
"Want to, not really. Need to, yes."
—-—
"Getting into the habit on bringing home files, Maria?" Natasha stands in her friends kitchen trying to reach the top of Maria's cupboard with a wet cloth.
"I'm going to run out of apartment for you to clean."
"Sarcasm is a poor woman's wit." Natasha hops down the chair gracefully before snatching the file out of Maria's hands.
"I've brought you some work so I don't smother you in your sleep."
"Well, you can try but you'd never succeed!" Natasha singsongs while perusing the details.
"You trying to ease me in?" She asks after a second. The mission was pure recon, a rookie could handle this.
"Circumstances have changed a bit." The two women share a look, before Maria continues "You don't have a team anymore."
—-—
Natasha tries to breath, the pain on her side making it harder by the minute. This mission, her 6th on her own had been a bust. These idiots overpowered her on her way out. Maria would never let her live this down, she had warned her not to go, the intel too sketchy, too many variables she couldn't control on her own.
Natasha went anyway, whatelse was she supposed to do? Continue to sit on Maria's sofa and clean her apartment until the world needed her again?
She needed to do this, she needed to help, she had red in her ledger and the world was one good person down thanks to her and the others.
After some gentle persuasion from Maria through various back channels the Red Cross had Sarah on a precautionary lockdown. Natasha had thrown a fit after Sharon told her that Secretary Ross had ordered 24/7 CIA surveillance on her friend, hoping Sarah would lead them to the wanted Avengers. She wanted her protected and safe, and that means she stays at home until they can clean this up.
She knew Sarah would rail against her once she figures it out, but she couldn't help herself.
She analysed each assignment with Sarah in mind; had refused some - had extended some parameters, trying to make the world a better place, while Sarah was on hiatus. Natasha hoped that would pacify her friend once this whole mess was over.
Not like Sarah kept quiet in her forced lockdown, a couple of political position paper had popped up, outlining the need of pardoning the Avengers, even now she still couldn't keep her mouth shut, Natasha grumbles in her mind.
Slinking further down in the cave Natasha had staked out as her hiding spot, she activates the emergency evac app on her phone.
'This is a one off, Nat.' Maria's warning rings in her head.
Natasha thinks back to the last time she needed such a help, it must have been when she was on the run with Steve, he had carried her out of the destroyed bunker, the way the sun lit his face, a small smile on his face as he drove the borrowed car.
'Is he feeling this lonely, too?'
It's the first time since New York, that she was running missions on her own, without him.
It felt like dancing without her dance partner. Every time she suits up, she expects to see him, waiting for her, his shield on his back, ready for another dance.
She misses him, not only in battle but in front of the tv, squabbling over take out and movies.
Is it too much to ask, that she wants it back? Is he thinking about her? Or had he washed his hands of her, the double agent, just as Tony had?
The sun starts to come up, bathing her surroundings in a deep orange.
Suddenly she hears some noise, people are approaching. Sighing Natasha readies her Glocks, she might need to shoot her way out.
Crouching down she makes her way towards the cave entrance, her skills kicking in, Natasha tries to count how many people are outside, she'd wager 3 maybe 4.
The team outside isn't speaking Arabic, that much Natasha is able to discern, it isn't English either, that means they aren't belonging to the other group.
"Agent Romanoff?" The whisper creates a small echo in the cave and Natasha freezes. They speak English all of a sudden, but a slight African accent traces their vocals. A male voice clearing their throat and then "Integrity!"
Natasha grits her teeth, 'Damn Maria for being so obsessed with Criminal Minds.'
"Blackbird." She answers loudly, slowly she backs her way out of the cave.
Her hand comes up out of instinct, shielding her eyes from the bright sunlight, after the dark cave, she makes out three silhouettes.
"It's good to see you, Miss Romanoff." Now she sees them properly.
"It's good to see you too, your majesty." Natasha crosses her arms in the Wakandan greeting.
The king smiles and he and his two companions reciprocate in kind. Natasha recognises one of the women as Okoye, the other one was unfamiliar but also bore the arms of the Dora Milaje.
Okoye greets Natasha with a stern face but a barely hidden smile, before introducing her to Unathi, a new recruit Okoye explains.
"How do you feel about spending some time in Wakanda, Miss Romanoff?"
"Your Majesty?" Natasha falls into step with him.
"A place where you can recuperate." He had clocked her deliberate movements the moment she stepped out of that cave. "And maybe meet some old friends?" The king grins at her, as he helps her settle down in the comfy jet seat. Defying all protocol, Natasha grabs T'Challa's hand and squeezes it.
"Thank you." Natasha tries to convey her thanks not only for her rescue, but for her friends as well.
"It was the least I could do."
—-—
Seeing Wakanda for the first time, it takes Natasha's breath away. The country is marvellous, unlike anything she's ever seen. A herd of zebras chases down below them. "It never gets old." Okoye comments at Natasha's gasp once the city of Birnin Zana comes into view.
"Yeah."
The jet hovers onto the landing pad of the palace and the head of the Dora Milaje guides Natasha of the plane.
A little welcoming committee was awaiting the rescue party, comprising of the Queen Mother and some of the ministers of Wakanda. Before Natasha is able to greet the Queen Ramonda, a flash of red barrels through the group and towards Natasha, letting out something between a sob and shriek.
The redhead can just about brace herself for the impact, as she's enveloped in a massive hug.
The group of Wakandan's share a soft smile as they observe the scene.
Holding back a groan, Natasha draws Wanda in "its alright, malen'kiy, it's alright."
She whispers while stroking the young woman's hair. "I'm so sorry! I'm so sorry for everything that happened." Hiding her face in Wanda's curls, Natasha takes in a shuttering breath. Her mind suddenly full of imagines of what happened to Wanda since the fight at the airport. "Oh malen'kiy, I never intended for this to happen. I hope you can forgive me one day."
Wanda draws back in shock, she hadn't meant to share like this, hadn't lost control over powers since she killed one of the guards.
Natasha shifts carefully, the throbbing in her rips not being aided by Wanda's crushing hug.
"I'm sorry!"
"You have nothing to be sorry for!" Natasha frames Wanda's face. "What happened is not you fault at all. What happened to you, should have never happened. I'm sorry."
"You're forgiven." Wanda smiles and kisses Natasha cheek.
"As touching as this all is, but what am I, yesterday's bread?" Another familiar voice makes itself heard. Natasha smiles gratefully, Sam always knows when to disperse the attention.
"One second, bird man. Need to greet the important people first." Natasha sasses right back and bowed before the Queen Mother.
"Your highness."
"Miss Romanoff, welcome to Wakanda."
"Thank you! I appreciate all your help and hospitality."
"It's our pleasure." Queen Ramonda smiles softly "Now, I will leave you in the capable hands of your friends to show you around, but if you join me for a private drink before tonight?"
"Of course, your highness." Natasha smiles in return, the request phrased as a question only to be polite.
"Wanda, please do show Miss Romanoff to the infirmary, as well." With that the Queen turns to her son "T'Challa accompany me to my quarters."
The king extending his elbow to his mother and guides her down the landing pad, but not before he turns around quickly pulling a face to the Avengers.
"He might be the king, but she's the boss." Okoye comments before following the entourage inside.
"It's good to see you, Widow." Sam kisses her cheek in greeting.
"Yeah." Natasha says softly, only now it becomes clear to her that Steve is not here to greet her.
"He's with Bucky." Sam supplies "he didn't know you were coming."
"The Princess thinks she achieved a breakthrough with the triggers." Wanda continues, while they slowly make their way through the palace. Despite her tiredness Natasha tracks their route, trying to memories the layout of the palace.
"So, Bucky is..."
"Still in cyro, but Shuri hopes to wake him up once the triggers are removed."
"And Steve is with him?"
"Most of the time, but the Princess kicks him out once a while, says she can only stand his moping for so long." Wanda giggles.
Natasha furrows her brows, why the hell would Steve be moping.
Wanda and Sam share a knowing smirk, those two - fucking clueless.
Sam opens the door to their suite.
"Home sweet home!"
One side of the room was full glass, allowing magnificent views over the palace garden. A comfortable sofa and arm chairs grouped in front of it, taking up most of the space, while a small Kitchenette and dining room table took up the other side.
Wanda and Sam took of their shoes before stepping further into the room.
"Our rooms are over here." Wanda guides Natasha to a small archway that lead to a hallway with two more doors.
"This is yours. I'm just next door." Wanda opens the door to Natasha's room. The bed prominent in the middle, large window panes offering the same view as the living room. "Bath and closet are through here."
"Thanks."
Wanda hugs Natasha once more "I'm so glad you're here."
"Me too."
Natasha steps into the bathroom and almost cries of happiness, this was a dream come true, a couple of tears make it down her face when she spots the closet, with clothes in her size.
—-—
Once again clean and in comfortable clothes, Natasha steps back out into the living room, when she hears raised voices, belonging to Sam and Steve. She could wager a guess what they are arguing about, her.
Well Steve was not going to argue about her, he was going to argue with her.
—-—
"Hey soldier." her soft voice vibrated through the otherwise empty room.
"Nat!" Steve pushes her name through his teeth like it causes him actual pain.
He got up from the settee and only then notices that Sam and Wanda had left the suite. He drinks her in, her hair changed once more, but otherwise she was the same. At least that's what he likes to think.
Steve knew, he knew that no one could be the same after their experiences. He saw it in Wanda every time her powers seem to take over, everytime Sam startles at loud sounds, the far away look he gets when holidays or family are mentioned.
Natasha moves slowly into the room, her body still hurts when she moved too quickly and then she found herself in Steve's bone crushing hug. The spy tried not to wince too much, as his arms snaked around her sides pressing into her tender ribs.
"How did you get here?" Steve had let her go after one too many Mississippis's and now regarded her warily. The last time Natasha and T'Challa where together, the redhead electrocuted the king with a Widow Bite.
"Well your gracious host has extended the invitation to me and I felt like a change of scenery, so I thought why not? If I am on forced vacation at least do it properly in Wakanda." Natasha shrugged lightly. 'Oh dammit, even that hurts.'
"Forced Vacation? Forced Vacation? That's what you call being a fugitive in over 190 countries?" Steve was flabbergasted, how could she take this so lightly?
"Steve. Do you honestly think I've been on vacation?"
He shakes his head, of course not, Natasha had never take a vacation as long as he'd known her.
"What have you been up to?"
"Just some little ops here and there. Maria's been organising it."
"You were at Maria's?"
"It took me a while to get there. She's in Paris now, but yeah, she's been getting me some missions. Was getting tired of me cleaning her flat."
Steve snorts, he'd pay some money to see that. Natasha never cleaned. "You must have been bored."
"Yeah, and needed to make up for some good people no longer to be able to do their job." Nat's voice light, but somehow her tones makes him shiver.
Steve narrows his eyes, who is she talking about?
For a second the two stare at each , just taking each other in.
He had changed, sporting a beard now and the longer hair, the weary look was not new, but intensified.
Steve looks no longer like he has the whole world on his shoulder, but more like the whole sorrow of the world.
Natasha closes her eyes, she would loose all her anger, if she kept looking at him, and she was angry, so angry and mad at him.
Steve couldn't take his eyes of her, she was back, finally back. The last weeks had been horrible, not only the recent events weighing heavy on him, but to go on without Natasha.
She has always been there, his only constant since he had come out of the Ice, since New York.
It has always been her who was there, who helped him navigate the new world, putting things onto perspective. They never disagreed much. Of course yes, on the best food (Thai - Natasha / Burger - Steve), the best Disney movie (Dumbo vs The Lion King), that stuff they'd disagreed plenty but not on the big things.
He'd never thought they'd be on different sides on the Accords.
"Do you want to get into it right now or do you want to wait until after dinner?" Natasha crossed her arms over her chest, her stance defensive.
"What?"
"Do you want to have our fight now or rather later?" Natasha repeated impatiently.
"I didn't think we needed to fight?"
"Really? You don't think you haven't done anything that would warrant us to have a heated exchange of opinions?"
"Didn't we do that at the airport already?"
"Oh no!" Natasha started pacing "I'm not talking about the Accords, and not even about what happened with Tony in Siberia."
"What are you talking about?" He has never seen her like this, she is like lioness stalking in front of him.
Natasha held up a finger, disappearing for one second. She steps back into the living room, a file in her hand.
"What are you talking about." Steve repeats his question and Natasha all but hurls the file at him.
Steve tries to grab it but too late, some of the loose papers inside flatter down on the floor.
'Interview Sarah Enders
Captain Rogers at your house
You've been arrested for housing war criminals.' He could make out on of them.
'Order for 24/7 surveillance' on another.
Steve lifts his eyes meeting Natasha's gaze. The lioness has disappeared, replaced by something else, something softer that scares him more than her anger ever could. It reminds him of the day Wanda had messed with her mind. She felt betrayed by her past and her mind, Nat had explained later on. This time he betrayed her - that thought is like a punch in the gut.
She can no longer be in a room with him, it hurts, it hurts how easily he breaks his promises to her.
She turns around the doorknob already underneath her hand, only one thought in her head 'run...don't let him hurt you again.'
"Natasha." He pleads, don't let her go, don't let let leave again.
"You promised me." With that the door closes behind her.