The Diego Diaries: Home (dd6 562)
=0=There
They ate their food and dessert, then sat back with a beer. Sun grinned. "That was so good, its illegal. Right?"
"That's everyday if you want it," Lissie said as she sat next to two mechs that were like brothers to her. The room was bristling with Immortals. "You do know that Wirelite and Chromo, Cezar and a few others are here."
"No," Jack said with a grin. "We have to see all of them."
"We will," Steiner said. "Just settle in. Liss and I are training now, Home Guard and officers corps. Even infant there comes to class like a good little mech."
Everyone turned to look at Ironhide who paused a spoonful of pie just before his mouth. He frowned slightly. "I'm as big as you slaggers."
"You'll never be that big, infant," Hardie said with a grin. He had a beer, his peds up and a full tank. Muy contento wasn't big enough to describe how he felt right now. Grins and chuckles of amusement greeted that.
"Apparently, Delph and the Kid have room for us," Jack said with a grin. "I haven't slept in a house, a real house in ages. I might not remember my manners."
"We're going to need a whipping boy then. I nominate Ironhide, my best little mech. The infant, that is," Delphi said as he smiled at his bestest and once upon a time onliest little mech.
Ironhide stared at the crowd smirking at him, then took the smart road for once. "I am, aren't I," he said with a preen.
Enormous laughter and a surprising amount of agreement greeted that as the door opened and a youngster peered inside hesitantly. It was Pulley, a high caste former troublemaking kid who was mentored with the big mechs through the Watch. "I was looking for Commander Springer and Commander Drift ..."
Drift spotted him, then waved. "Come in. Have a seat."
Pulley hesitated, then stepped inside followed by Coros and several others. He hesitated again. "The others came with me, Commander."
"The more, the merrier," Drift said as Ratchet rose and handed off Possibility to Prowl.
"I got this, sonny boy," Ratchet said with a smile. "Come with me, infants. You look like you could use a meal."
Drift grinned at them and nodded slightly so they followed Ratchet to a buffet line like no other they'd ever seen.
Ratchet turned to them. "Have you eaten?" he asked.
"A bit. Not much," a kid named OD said. Behind him listening nervously in the attention of so many big and important mechs, soldiers and the Prime himself, kids named Elkin, Dell, Ovid and a small pretty femme named Jessine watched as Ratchet took a plate and handed it to Pulley and Coros. "If you want to run with the big mechs, you have to eat like one. All of this is great. Fill up and I'll bring you a drink."
Jack who sat near where they stood leaned slightly forward. "Are these relatives, Ratchet?" he asked.
The kids turned to look at the two giant mechs sitting with infants and a beer bottle. They were overwhelmed a moment by their looks, size and ultra masculinity couched in an Ironhide face. Everywhere they looked there were military mechs and femmes of the most decorated and gnarly variety. It was almost too much magnificence for them to take in. They were silent as they stared at Jack.
"These kids are part of the Watch mentoring program, right?" Ratchet asked as he handed the other kids plates.
"Yes, sir," Jessine said as she stared up at the tall medical bot who had once been described to her as that 'mad doctor from the Iacon slums'.
"These kids are stepping up," Springer said from nearby. "These kids are amazing. We're going on horse patrol tonight and they're coming. They've been taking riding lessons at the stable and they're learning all the things a Watchman should know. There's few kids around as fine as these."
They stared at Springer as he spoke and for everyone in the room it was obvious that hero worship wouldn't be enough for this group of kids to express the esteem in which they both held Drift and Springer.
Hercy nodded nearby. "These infants are considering policing and security careers. There's not a group of infants anywhere as top notch as these are."
They glanced from mech to mech, listening with awe and wonder on their faces as they spoke. Ratchet who knew the tale blitzed it to Sun and Jack. They glanced at him, then the kids. Sun leaned slightly forward. "There's nothing finer a mech or femme can do, infants, that matters more than ensuring the well being and safety of our people. You infants if you become policing officers will be the last line of defense between the enemy and our most vulnerable people. It makes me proud to see such stand up infants. Your genitors must be proud," he added through Ratchet said that was still undetermined.
They glanced at each other nearly capsized with the praise and attention. "We want to do this," Jessine said as she stepped closer. "I don't want to do anything else. I've gone on beats with the femmes, Chromia and Arcee. It's so amazing. They're so amazing," she said.
Arcee peered around a mech, then patted the floor next to her. "Get your food, Jess, and sit with us."
Jessine glanced around at Arcee, then smiled brilliantly. Turning to the buffet, she began to get food with Ratchet's help.
"You infants are the future. You're why we fight," Sun said with a stern expression to the five mesmerized young mechs who stood before him with plates in their hands. "We go out and do the battles. But you will be here going through the colony helping people, getting them home, sorting out their woes. That's the work of Primus, Himself."
"I can't agree more, Sun," Hardie said. The kids turned to look at the fabled general relaxing nearby. All of them being raised high caste knew tattoos and the number of exempts and Immortals in the room at the moment made them nearly light headed. "Our infants are our gold. You kids are going to be fine officers. Springer and Drift only have great things to say about you. All the mechs and femmes like having you with them. Keep doing what you're doing. It brings you honor."
"We will, Abba," they said as some of them bowed their helms respectfully.
"Are you excelling in school?" Sun asked with a slight grin of amusement at their sweetness.
"We are, Abba," Ovid said as the others nodded. "We caught up. We're in regular class now. Our school was good but not this hard."
Sun nodded. "Then you bring honor to yourselves. Every inch you improve yourself, that's ten more feet of protection our people have. Remember that."
"We will, Abba," the boys murmured.
Jessine passed by with a heaping plate and a smile as she walked to where Elita, Arcee, Moonracer and Chromia sat. She sat down among them and began to eat as she basked in their company. The boys would join her, sitting with Drift, Springer, Sandstorm and Twin Twist. Ratchet distributed drinks and sat again, more than content with the interlude.
The off line conversation was just as entertaining as that online and before they changed subject Sun, Hardie and Jack would be going on patrol with the Watch tonight. Horseback riding would be a new thing for all of them but Hardie. He had fallen off a few times tying one on with Prime, after all.
=0=Migration
They were coming in five thousand at a time. It would take a few orns to clear the group, all 672,487 of them. The Seekers were already gone, going through the repatriation process at the Aerie Hill Federal Government Annex on Main Street in that city. 658 Seekers were retrieved and with them were a lot of families and elders. Two new Clan Chieftains were reclaimed to almost hysterical delight from one clan, a small one that lived in the south pole of Cybertron.
Small pockets of Seekers had lived in small areas separated from most others who lived around the Greater Vos area and while Breezy's clan was well known and very unique even among Seekers, most of these were small and little known. For their Clan Chieftains to return sent those few who were here into a frenzy of dancing and singing, something that was joined in by everyone there.
Aerie Hill would be a swinging town tonight.
=0=Party
Partition sat on the floor by a big window engrossed in conversation with Riff, Cargo, Keystock and Rad-R. Bron-E and Borealis were sitting across the room near their genitors, Edict and Hobbes. The Squad was there sitting by the windows or on the floor eating, drinking and laughing.
Even Lucien.
Joon and Vinn were here without their three kids and new grandson as were Madura and Proteus with their new son, Rugur, Edict with Hobbes who was laughing with Vinn over a story or something, Laslo who was sitting beside Lucien who was telling a joke of all things to Proteus along with Anders and Burris who were listening with amusement … it was such a sight that Ratchet took snaps for his collection.
Sun grinned at him. "I suppose there's a story for everyone in this room?"
"Actually, handsome," Ratchet said as he lounged in his chair with his big old peds on the coffee table and camera in hand, "this is a miracle, A MIRACLE, I SAY!"
Everyone in the room paused to look at Ratchet slouched in his chair with a dazzling smile on his face.
"What's a miracle, Ratchet?" Burris asked as he peered around Sandstorm.
"Why you are, Burris. And you, Lucien. ESPECIALLY you. And you and you and you," Ratchet said as he nodded to everyone. He glanced at Prowl. "Even you, Granny. Do you have any idea just how many big eyed children in this room call me Mom?"
HUGE laughter, several requests to increase that number and a lot of slag later …
"You aren't getting any insane notion that you're going to adopt any of the slaggers in this room are ya?" Ironhide asked with a gimlet optic.
At that moment, the door opened and half the metrotitans around began to walk in with booze, desserts and slag. They slowed as they came in to bullshit a moment, then find their place. Everyone was surprisingly comfortably accommodated, covered in infants who wanted to sit on their laps and then Ratchet glanced at Ironhide with a grin. "Yes."
BEDLAM!
=0=Way out there
They fled the scene, running for their lives. None of their intel told them that Prime was this close and that he had such firepower. Most of those who came at Prime's call headed in the direction of his voice. Nothing was given in the message of location but then that would be a nearly impossible thing given how widely everyone was scattered. Those who got the message did get a directional download that was embedded in it so that they could follow the trail backward toward the source.
The group was a battle hardened collection of smaller ones led by a mech who had entertained challenges when they came together but got none. He was a big mech, broad of shoulder and analytical of mind. He had been a civilian who had been well educated but had a hard cold streak of badness in him that couldn't be denied. He was a jack of all trades on both sides of the military divide, administrative and fighting. He was no one's fool and no one to frag off.
He sat on his command chair and pondered the route, something that never happened before when he was in the lead. He had called his ships to pull away, cutting their loses so as to fight another orn. He would regroup, then follow a couple of strange signals both ahead and farther away. He would do so with some very skillful navigation.
He was heading for a nebula nearby to regroup, sort out the traffic locally and up ahead. He had received two messages before this happened, one from Razorclaw and one from Ominous of all mechs. He had parted that mech's skull on more than one occasion. It was to his advantage not to tell that mech who he was. He was going to bullet a reply soon enough. He just had to cover it so that the net he was sure that Prime had wasn't going to pick it up.
They entered the nebula relying on its ambient radiation and energetic chaos to hide them a bit. He would send his messages, then wait a few orns getting their fleet back into good order. Then he would decide and set out again. He wasn't very worried. He was a phase six mechanism after all. Sitting back, Pulsar of Capital City, former high caste mechanism and all around trouble on the hoof watched as the last of his fleet entered the radiation pool to disappear off everyone's sensor screens who might be watching.
=0=At a shindig
"And that's when I called for a runabout to airlift them to the Med Center," Partition said as he leaned against the window.
Lon nodded. "That was a mess. Not as big a mess as the two murders. Not much more is being released about either. I've signed up for detective courses but nothing too serious. I still love my beat and going out with Bez."
Bezel who was sitting between Roto and Terradive nodded. "Detective is great but a beat is the best to me. I love night patrols."
Partition nodded as Lancer sat down again with new beer for everyone. They took them, then relaxed. Sitting nearby, the youngling kids who came, all of the six of them listened to stories told by the other mechs. Some of the soldiers were sitting with them showing them knives made by Ratchet's ada and atar along with their scars when asked. It was as fascinating for them to talk to the kids as it was for the kids to talk to the soldiers.
Morius and Inweld were leaning in together to discus something or other about the break coming up on the duty schedule with some other younger mechs who were part of their group. They liked to climb in the Valles and it looked like the next few orns upcoming would be no different when their shifts were on stand down. Christmas Surprise was tomorrow and they would follow the crowds around, informally on duty if something came up but off otherwise. They both had someone they were seeing and it was fun. One of them was a forest ranger in the Valles, someone Morius had met on a hiking trip with friends and the other, Inweld was seeing someone who was a biologist for the Land Survey Bureau. Going all over the world to see things and do science about them was the bomb.
Prowl rose and walked to the bar to take a 'wine spritzer' or flavored vinegar for himself and Ratchet who was feeling no pain. Solus, Uraya and Sojourner were sitting on one arm of Ratchet's chair while Hero, Iacon and Halo sat on the other. They were telling knock-knock jokes and 'Confucius Says' jokes to each other that the humans had taught them to drive their genitors crazy.
It was working.
"Ha-ha," a tiny laugh said as Sojie smiled at Hero, Iacon and Halo. "What did the ..." She paused to think a moment, almost falling off the chair she was so filled with delight at the jokes being told. "What did the door knob say when someone came over?" She smiled at the others with almost a delirious amount of joy.
"I DON'T KNOW! WHAT DID IT SAY!?" Iacon asked with her tiny little voice.
Everyone at that end of the room was watching, entranced along with Ratchet who looked from one side to the other in blissed out enjoyment. Jack and Sun were mesmerized.
Sojie cackled, then leaned forward. She hesitated a moment as she thought what they might say, then she did what all kids do when they're overcome with their own glee. "He … he …"
"He hee-hee'd?" Ratchet asked as he smiled at the six little twiglets.
They looked at Ratchet, then burst into laughter. Sun braced Halo, Hero and Iacon with his arm as Ratchet braced the other three. They fell into laughter which would go on for some time. Ratchet took his spritzer from Prowl, sipped it, then grinned as Uraya gathered up to say something. "WHAT DID CONFUCIUS SAY!?"
"I DON'T KNOW, URI! WHAT DID HE SAY!?" Iacon asked with enormous joy.
"HE SAID … CONFUCIUS SAY DOGS BARK!" she finally squeezed out before falling into Ratchet's lap in convulsions.
BEDLAM on the arms of Ratchet's chairs. Huge laughter from everyone else.
=0=Way later that night
"You put your ped here," Springer said pointing to a stirrup on a horse named Dog. He was huge, massive and spotted. He was obviously an appaloosa but looked like a big Dalmation. "Swing the other over, slip it into the other stirrup, then use these reins like I showed you."
Jack grinned, then did the job, swinging into the saddle like a pro. Around him, the regular mounted patrols, six excited kids and his brothers, Sun and Hardie along with Steiner and Lissie were hopping up to go. They would. They would go everywhere in the colony, show the kids stuff along with the regular patrol and see what a miracle the colony was. They would tell stories, get coffee at a food truck in Retriarius on break, learn about basketball coming up soon, a family affair between Kaon's Kowboys and the Iacon Invaders, help a bunch of people, break up a few fights in bars and help take 32 drunks to jail.
It would be the most fun the entire group had in vorns.
Happy Christmas Surprise Eve to everyone.
=0=TBC 1-4-19 edited 1-6-19
When my sister was a little kid she saw a show about Confucian sayings and thereby decided to tell her own. They were that ditzy and then she included knock-knock jokes. We couldn't shut her up. She thought she was hilarious. Thinking back on it, she was. :D