It was the same round room. The same white walls. The same tall thrones. The same sleepy Nobodies. The Room Where Nothing Gathers usually boasted a tone of absolute boredom — so much so that it was a comfort to the Organization's members to have some semblance of routine in the daily pandemonium that was their lives. No matter what chaos awaited them, they could at least look forward to a dull meeting every morning before heading off to their varying levels of topsy turvy. Tonight, however, the air in the room was different. Tonight, there was an overwhelming sense of unease. The atmosphere reeked of foreboding and nervousness. Emotions that these half-beings were not supposed to be able to feel.

"Sir, please excuse our lack of preparedness. We have not had time to write reports."

Saïx perched tensely on the edge of his throne, mindlessly rubbing his forehead in an effort to loosen the painfully stiff muscles of his brow. His posture was straight as a board with his legs crossed at the knee as always, a perfect image of well-practiced poise, but his face was etched with discomfort and exhaustion.

"Never mind the reports," Xemnas leaned forward in his seat, appearing a bit strained himself. "Tell me what has happened."

"Roxas entered Castle Oblivion with Axel, as ordered," Saïx began. "He traversed fourteen rooms before collapsing, complaining of headaches and abdominal pains. Axel brought him back here where he lost consciousness. He is now in Vexen's care."

Vexen cleared his throat. "Yes, we have examined him thoroughly. We are not entirely sure what happened, but we have observed an increase in size and erratic movements from the entity. It is rapidly draining Roxas' energy and completely disrupting his equilibrium."

"Well that much is obvious," Xigbar taunted, seemingly annoyed to be awake. "Kid looks like hell. How about telling us something we don't know?"

Vexen glared fiercely at him, preparing to retaliate when Xemnas interrupted the impending squabble. "Do you believe that the entity is hostile?"

Composing himself, Vexen shifted slightly before responding. "Based on what little evidence we can gather, I would say yes, it's quite dangerous. Roxas' vitals have gone haywire, and it's getting harder and harder to rouse him from these comas he keeps falling into. What's worse," he paused. "The creature seems to be aware of us. Every time we interfere, it responds by attacking Roxas from the inside."

"Attacking him how?"

The scientist was visibly uncomfortable as he listed the events. "Sometimes it'll just thrash about and nauseate him. Other times it might induce muscular contractions strong enough to break bones. At its worst, it has caused several fainting spells and a frightening decline in the functionality of nearly all of his systems. Frankly, it's a wonder he's still alive."

There was a long beat while Xemnas mulled over the disturbing report. The air in the room was heavy. Suffocating. Not a soul dared breathe while they awaited the Superior's response.

"I must say," Xemnas sighed. "This is rather disconcerting."

It was Saïx who had lost his patience this time, uncrossing his knees as if to jump out of his seat and lunge across the room at Vexen. "This has gone on long enough! Roxas is ill and suffering. The experiment must end immediately if he is to survive!"

"Haven't you been listening? We're trying to—!"

"Gentlemen…" Xemnas intervened. "Vexen, Zexion, have you made any attempts to remove the vessel?"

The scientist kept a stern watch on Saïx while he spoke, spitting out each word with exaggerated enunciation to ensure their clarity. "We have, sir. We've been met with only failure. The vessel puts Roxas into a state of near-death every time we try."

"Seriously?" Xigbar questioned with disbelief. "It's seriously trying to kill him?"

"I attempted to give him a simple painkiller," Vexen exasperated. "It… It stopped his breathing. It wouldn't release him until I had left the room entirely."

The room filled with the high-pitched squeaks of leather against leather. Every man seemed to curl in on himself, recoiling to the backs of their seats with notable apprehension. Some were motionless, paralyzed. Others fidgeted and trembled. Mouths opened to speak, only to close again. For the first time in a long while, no one felt safe.

A long exhale broke the silence, followed by an incredulous whisper from Saïx's throne. "Just what the hell is this thing? How does it know what you're trying to do?"

The only sound to follow was an excruciating silence as his comrades quietly entertained every morbid fantasy about what the creature could be in their minds. The imagery they conjured up was enough to turn their stomachs at the thought of sharing Roxas' affliction. Fear spread like a virus among them as the reality of being the entity's next potential victims set in.

"Sir, if I might add something…?" Zexion interjected in a small voice, summoning everyone out of their gruesome thought spirals for the moment.

The superior smiled down at the young apprentice, refreshed to hear from someone who wasn't arguing or lashing out. He gestured politely to the young man. "Please proceed, Zexion."

Zexion had been clutching his notepad with a death grip, but did not even look at it as he made his case. "This thing has a plan. We don't know what it is, but it has loudly and clearly asserted its dominance. It is in charge here."

While he paused to let his suggestion sink in, the leader pressed him to continue. "Your point?"

Zexion bit his lip, hesitating to go on. He glanced up at Vexen and was quickly met with a reassuring nod. He swallowed audibly and took a breath. "It can't stay in there forever. I think the entity is going to come out of Roxas… on its own terms."

There was movement in his periphery as his comrades instinctively shifted in their seats. Legs were crossed, arms were tucked in, hands were folded, and jaws were clenched in response, each man taking on a significantly more guarded posture. Repulsed, Xigbar was the one to voice the simple, primeval reaction everyone shared. "Aw gross…"
"Pardon me, Zexion, it's been quite some time since I last took a course on human anatomy," Saïx condescended. "But if I'm not sorely mistaken, Roxas is not properly equipped to eject the entity 'on its own terms.'"

"He doesn't have to be," Zexion countered, finishing his theory with an insistent, almost pleading tone. "This is a very powerful creature we're dealing with. When it decides that it's ready to come out, it doesn't need a clearly-marked exit. It just needs to be strong enough to break down the door."

The room winced in unison.

"You mean chestburster style?" Xigbar gulped.

"Maybe. Maybe not."

"Well what other option is there?"

Zexion dropped his eyes, nervously brushing his coat. "Well…"

He didn't need to finish the sentence. Their imaginations more than did the job for him. His voice trailed off, only for Saïx to pick up where he left off. "Are you suggesting Roxas is going to just birth the damn thing out himself?"

"Not entirely, but—"

Xigbar laughed out loud. "Shit, we better start planning a baby shower!"

"This isn't funny, Xigbar!"

"Settle down, gentlemen."

Xemnas halted the conversation, weary of the petty quarrels and shouting matches. He linked his fingers peering through them while he contemplated the situation. His underlings held their tongues while they waited for his conclusion. After a moment, he dropped his hands and addressed the congregants at large. His composure had faltered slightly, and he seemed almost desperate for answers.

"I am willing to entertain your theories. Just what is this creature living inside our Number XIII?"

Saïx crossed his arms. "With this level of hostility, it sounds like some sort of demon."

Vexen scoffed. "Don't be ridiculous, there's no such things as demons."

"Sure seems pretty damn evil, though," Xigbar cut in. "I'm just saying."

Saïx rolled his eyes and threw out another suggestion, one he wasn't sure he even believed himself. "It could be a Heartless. They've shown some limited sentience. Certainly enough to match this creature's behavior."

Zexion piped up, still sounding underconfident compared to his comrades. "It could be human."

Vexen stroked his chin before shaking his head. "It's too powerful to be human. Besides, stray hearts don't generally turn back into humans. At most, it would be a replica."

"You're not entirely correct, Vexen," Saïx reminded him. "There are two known instances of stray hearts regaining a human appearance."

Vexen conceded the correction. The keyblade hero Sora's heart had taken on his human appearance and infiltrated Castle Oblivion many months ago, and was still in a deep coma as far as the Organization was aware. It was one of the very few known instances of a human and their Nobody coexisting as separate beings. The only other person to accomplish this feat was their Superior.

"Either way," Vexen added. "A human fetus is not sentient. It wouldn't have any awareness of us or our interference, and it wouldn't be able to assault Roxas like this."

Taking things seriously for once, Xigbar offered the next suggestion. "What if it's some new hybrid monster or something? Something we've never seen before?"

"Intriguing…" Xemnas hummed curiously. "An entirely unique being of our own creation…"

It seemed that the conversation had gone in circles for hours and fatigue was rapidly setting in for everyone. Vexen's testy mood was only worsening in response to Xigbar's bothersome quips and jeers. Zexion, wary of the rising antagonism in the atmosphere, seemed to shrink into his seat, covering his ears when the clashes got out of hand. Saïx's head was pounding so hard that his vision blurred, and he winced every time a voice was raised until the pain became so great that it triggered his own rage.

"So, if we interfere, we could lose Roxas. If we don't interfere, we could lose Roxas. We've no way out of this."

Xemnas, weary and perplexed, all but threw up his hands. "It would seem so…"

Xigbar hurled another gibe in Vexen's direction. "Well you're the scientist, why don't you come up with something?"

Zexion whipped his head around to defend his fellow apprentice. "We work day and night searching for a solution."

"Well, you certainly are doing something day and night, that's for sure."

"What's that supposed to mean?"

"I'm just sayin', seems your focus is on other things these days…"

"How dare you!"

Vexen waved to cut Zexion off, fuming at Xigbar with fury in his eyes. "I certainly haven't seen you come up with anything, you lout!"

"Hey, who're you callin' a—!"
"That's quite enough!"

Xemnas roared, having finally lost his patience with their juvenile bickering. His booming voice halted the altercation almost immediately, and he heaved a sigh when he had finally regained control of the room.

"It seems tensions are rather high. It is late, and we are all fatigued. I think it best if we revisit this issue tomorrow after we've had some rest."

He turned to the scientists. "For now, keep Roxas comfortable. It would appear that there is not much else we can do at this time. Keep me apprised of any changes in his condition."

He shifted his attention back to the small collection of men around him, taking care to lock eyes with each one as he made his final request. "Before I dismiss you, I would like to know if there is anything else unusual that you wish to report. No matter how insignificant it may be."

He waited for nearly a minute, focusing on every face below him and giving them an opportunity to voice the concerns that were so obviously burning in their minds. His knowing expression seemed to drill right through their foreheads, and for a moment, they feared that their leader could read their thoughts.

"Nothing?" he arched a brow suspiciously, but still no one spoke. Finally, accepting that he would not be getting anything from them, Xemnas relented and waved an arm, ending the meeting.

"Very well. You are dismissed."

A flustered-looking Zexion was first to go, hurriedly ducking into his corridor and out of sight. Xigbar shot one last smirk to Vexen before slinking into his own portal, closely followed by Vexen, who disappeared with a seething glare. With only the Superior and his second in command left, the room was mercifully quiet. Though there was more to say, both took some time to appreciate the stillness, relieved at the small glimmer of peace they could share. With a far more relaxed demeanor, Xemnas leaned toward Saïx and delivered his last instruction for the evening.

"Saïx. As soon as he recovers, I would like Roxas sent to Agrabah to eliminate the giant Heartless there."

Saïx blinked, his jaw dropping at such an order. "Sir? That could—"

"If this creature will only vacate Roxas when it wants to, perhaps we should give it a reason. We can interfere without actually interfering."

Saïx pondered the idea. Xemnas was never one to make hasty decisions. Every order he gave was carefully planned, so it would stand to reason that he'd already put some thought into this. Still, he could not shake the feeling of unrest in his stomach. "It's risky, sir. The entity might become aware of our intentions."

"Our options are quite limited."

Saïx would have liked to feel even slightly hopeful at the prospect of a workable solution, but could only sigh at the sad reality of the situation. "Roxas is in no condition to fight. He would be obliterated."

"Do not send him alone. Assemble a team to accompany him. We needn't give Roxas more than a light jostling."

For the moment, Saïx could think only of Axel. As the one member of the Organization the boy trusted, it was obvious that Axel would be on that team. If nothing else, it seemed the most compassionate choice. If Roxas were to perish on this mission, at least he would be with his only friend. On the other hand, it seemed especially cruel to force Axel to watch him succumb to whatever hell this entity would unleash upon its host, knowing there would be nothing he could do to save him. All the while, Saïx could only wonder why he cared at all about being compassionate or cruel to either one of them when he lacked the heart necessary to produce such empathy.

Seeing that his comrade remained unconvinced, Xemnas defended his position, appealing to Saïx's keen sense of logic. "You did say it was high time this vessel was removed, and I would tend to agree. I am merely suggesting a course of action that might preserve the boy's life."

There simply was no solution. No option existed that was without risk. Saïx had no choice but to comply. "Of course. I will give the order, sir."

The throbbing in his head was becoming unbearable. Saïx eagerly awaited his dismissal, but to his dismay, the Superior posed yet another question. "Saïx, are you feeling unwell?"

His breath caught in his throat. "Sir?"

"You do not seem yourself."

It seemed a bit of an understatement, but the observation was enough to catch Saïx off guard. After his argument with Axel, he'd gone to his room to write a report on the incident at Castle Oblivion. His wandering mind hindered him, and page after page ended up in the wastebasket. He'd made so many attempts that his wrist became sore once again. His recollection of Axel's expert massage skills only served to distract him further. Try as he did, he could not sweep the temptation from his mind.

He couldn't have been less in the mood. He lay naked on his bed, hoping the frigid air might quell the growing arousal. He cursed his primitive desires at the same time as he surrendered to them. When he was finished, he felt no sense of relief. He was neither calm nor relaxed. If anything, he felt dirty. The headache began shortly after that, and nothing seemed to placate it now.

"I've not had much sleep, sir," he admitted. "In a long time."

Xemnas feigned a look of sympathy. "Perhaps you should indulge in a brief respite. Xigbar can easily hand out mission briefings."

Saïx shook his head. "This is a critical stage. I mustn't become lax in my duties now."

"Even you need your rest."

At this point, Saïx would have said anything to convince the Superior to finally release him. He would have tea. He would take a lengthy shower. He would beg Zexion for a sedative. Whatever it would take to satisfy Xemnas' curiosity and prevent any further prying. He needed to get out of there before he collapsed.

He bowed his head obediently. "Yes, sir. I will consider it."

Xemnas' smile was as haunting as it was polite. "Pleasant dreams, No. VII."

Day 194 — I'm just done

I fainted again. I don't even know what happened, it was so fast. Castle Oblivion hurts your eyes when you go in there, and going through every door only to end up right back in the same room where I started was disorienting. My head was starting to ache and I was having those flashing images again. I don't know what was going on, but I saw myself in those images. I saw my comrades. But I don't remember any of the things that I was doing. Were those dreams? Were they memories?

Anyway, the creature in me didn't like it, I guess. Whatever it did, it really hurt. It was like it was trying to break through my skin. I could barely breathe. It was really scary. Is it powerful enough to do that? Can it just burst out of there any time it wants? That's terrifying. I would never survive. Why aren't they doing anything about this?

Maybe it's just me, but the others are acting weird. I suppose they're just nervous about this whole thing, but I see a lot more than nerves on some of them. Their eyes are changing. Their whole faces are changing. I can't describe it. They look at me and they become almost unrecognizable. It doesn't seem to happen to Axel, though. He always looks the same. I'm glad I can count on him.

I'm on bedrest now. Indefinitely. I want to be pissed about being stuck here, but I'm too tired to fight anymore. I'm just done. I don't know how much longer they're going to leave this damned thing in me and I have no idea how they plan to get it out, but I'm over it. At this point, whatever happens, happens. I just don't have the energy to care.

"Hey, Roxas."

Axel was leaning in the doorway with crossed arms, a forced smile and tired eyes. Roxas had been so engrossed in his writing that he hadn't even heard the door open. For the past few days, Axel made a point to come and visit Roxas both before and after his missions, and it was clearly taking a toll on him. His stance was not the casual lean that Roxas was used to seeing, but more of a jaded slump, as if the door frame were the only thing keeping the man from collapsing to the floor in exhaustion.

"Axel. Back already? How was your mission?"

"Boring, as usual."

Axel dragged his feet as he sauntered to the bed to sit beside Roxas. "How are ya holding up?"

Roxas shrugged. "Well, I'm not dead yet."

Axel smirked, closing his eyes briefly to hide the sadness. "I'm glad to hear that."

There was an awkward silence for a while. Roxas stared at the ceiling, as he had done all day every day since being forced to remain in bed. The creature inside him flailed restlessly but he ignored it, having grown weary of its demands.

"I think it's working."

"Hmm?"

Roxas sat up, elaborating his theory. "It's collecting memories. My memories. I think they're coming back to me."

"You think so?"

He tried to summon up the images he saw while climbing through the castle. He found Axel's face, etched with sorrow. Roxas watched himself turn away while his friend reached for him. There was desperation in his voice. It tore at Roxas from the inside, but at the time his anger was too great to feel the guilt.

"Yeah. I'm getting them in pieces. I don't really understand them yet."

"Well, what do you see?"

He had reached the exit only to find Saïx blocking his path. He summoned his claymore and lunged. The image began to blur. Now Roxas was looking down at him, slumped onto the floor in a heap, panting, wounded, defeated. Looking up at his opponent with widened eyes, he presented the first facial expression Roxas had seen him make other than contempt. Utter shock. Bewilderment. Meanwhile, Roxas' anger only intensified, and as he walked past his best friend a second time, never once looking back even as the man begged him not to leave, he coldly rejected the only person who had ever cared about him. Roxas heard Axel mutter something from a distance as he was leaving, but he couldn't make out the words that were said.

"I see myself… leaving the castle."

Roxas' thoughts began to race. The pictures flew by more and more quickly. His head was aching, but he refused to shut them out. He was lying on wet pavement with raindrops spilling onto his face. He was injured. Everything seemed to hurt. A stranger was standing over him, peering at him with apparent curiosity, of all things. His rage boiled over. Roxas seized the opportunity and attacked, quickly tackling his adversary to the ground with both Keyblades aimed directly at his throat. The rain beat down on his back as his opponent began to transform. His vision clouded, flickering in and out. There was pain. There was fear. Something was crushing the life out of him. He couldn't breathe. Everything went dark.

There was a sickening clench in his abdomen. It was a crushing sensation much like the one from his memory. He winced, grasping the sheet in his fist and holding his breath while he waited for it to pass.

"Roxas…? Are you okay?"

It lasted only a few seconds, but was enough to send Axel into a panic. As the pain subsided, Roxas quickly pacified the man, assuring him that he needn't worry. "I'm fine. It was nothing."

"Roxas, tell me what's going on."

"Just give me a minute. I see…" He dug into his memories again, trying to remember the last one that had come to him before he collapsed in the castle. "Strangers."

He was being dragged along a cold tile floor. There were oddly-shaped vessels of some sort lining the dark hallway he was in. Then, there was light. Very bright light, emanating from several glowing screens dominating one wall. He was dropped into a platform where a frightening man who hid his face behind maroon wrappings was closely studying him. Roxas tried to speak, but no words came out. He couldn't move his mouth. He couldn't move anything. He was completely paralyzed. There was a machine above his head, making a dull whirring noise. The man stepped away, and moments later the machine was firing up. The whirring noise crescendoed dramatically and lights began to flash. The man was laughing hysterically. There was fear again. Roxas began to panic. He had never before felt so afraid. He tried to scream. There was no sound. Everything went dark again.

The pain struck him a second time, more intensely than before, knocking the wind out of him. Roxas gasped, clutching his abdomen and squeezing his eyes shut.

"I'm going to get Zexion. Stay in bed."

"Wait…"

Roxas felt Axel rising from the mattress and reached out for him, tightly gripping his wrist so that he wouldn't leave. The pain faded and he sighed with relief. Axel knelt beside the bed, staring at Roxas with a worried look. Roxas was quiet for a few moments as he analyzed the puzzle. The memories triggered the pains. That was obvious. But how? Why?

"Axel… have I been in Castle Oblivion before?"

Axel didn't answer right away, uncertain if it was something Roxas should know about. "Yeah… We went there to investigate something a while back. There was an imposter wearing our coat that we were trying to catch."

"So… they weren't dreams, then. Those really were my memories…"

"What do you mean? What else did you see?"

The memories nudged him yet again, laying out another series of images for him to watch. Roxas saw himself walking in an alley in Twilight Town. It was dark outside. He was wearing clothes he'd never seen. He had been looking at the ground, watching his feet take each step, and nearly jumped when he saw another set of feet ahead of his. He looked up and was startled to see a tall hooded figure leaning against the brick wall.

"You. I see you."

Roxas froze, prepared to run. The figure lowered his hood and revealed himself as Axel. Roxas winced at the harsh sting that shot through the center of his forehead upon seeing Axel's face. The man seemed familiar, but Roxas was certain he hadn't seen him before. Axel spoke to him, but his words didn't make sense. He got angry and brandished a pair of wheel-shaped weapons with sharp spikes on them. Fire seemed to emanate from the stranger's body and spread quickly until it formed a barrier surrounding the pair. Roxas tried to back away, soon realizing he was completely defenseless and had nowhere to run. Suddenly, as if straight out of thin air, a weapon materialized in his hand, shaped like a giant key. He had no time to be surprised, as the stranger lunged at him with a cry of rage.

Just as before, Roxas was seized by an intense pain wrapping around his middle and squeezing him senseless. It was so quick that Roxas hadn't had the chance to prepare for it. He grunted as the air was forcefully pressed from his lungs, and for a moment he struggled to inhale.

"Roxas, it's hurting you. Let me go get—"

"Axel, what happened when I was kidnapped?"

As expected, the clench released him and the pain died down. Roxas was now convinced that this was a pattern, and had to figure out why it was happening. He needed to understand the meaning of these strange memories and their connection to the entity's movements.

"The things I saw didn't make sense. There's more to the story. Please, tell me."

"Roxas…"

"Tell me!"

Axel wanted to fight him, but Roxas would not budge. Defeated, Axel relented and gave Roxas just enough information to placate him without revealing everything. "The imposter we were looking for is the guy who ended up kidnapping you. His group were trying to get to you because… because you're a very powerful Keyblade Wielder."

Roxas stared in disbelief. "What? That's all?"

"Roxas, not many people can wield a Keyblade. It takes something special to be able to do that, and you have that something special. They wanted it for themselves."

"But why? What good am I to them? What were they going to use me for? What else does the Keyblade do that I don't know about?"

"Roxas…"

"Axel, I saw myself walking out of this castle all on my own. You were sad to see me go. Saïx attacked me to stop me from leaving. What happened, Axel? Why did I leave?"

Time was quickly running out, no matter how Axel stalled for more. He tried to convince himself it was for the boy's own safety that he wasn't told what would happen if the Keyblade was used on a person. Perhaps it was for the best that Roxas didn't know where he came from. Maybe it was all for the greater good. No matter how many times he repeated this collection of lies, Axel just couldn't make himself believe a word of it. It was no wonder Roxas took off when he did. Axel didn't blame him.

Roxas' face fell. "You can't tell me…"

"That's not it, Roxas. I just—" Axel cut himself off, treading dangerously close saying too much. "I don't want you to leave again."

"Axel, I'm your friend… whatever it is, if you just explain it to me…"

"Axel."

Their conversation came to an abrupt halt at the sound of Saïx's voice. Axel turned to see him standing in the doorway with his arms crossed and a disapproving look on his face. The two hadn't spoken a word to each other since the incident at Castle Oblivion, and Axel had no intention of changing that now.

"What do you want?" Axel sneered, having no patience for the bothersome interruption.

"I have a message for you," Saïx's tone was cold and clinical. "I'm afraid it's confidential."

"Can it wait?"

"It's marked 'urgent' as well."

Axel glared at him, but had no choice but to surrender. With a heavy sigh, he turned to Roxas as he rose to his feet. "Roxas… I'll see you later, okay?"

"Axel, please…" Roxas begged. "Don't keep me in the dark."

Axel winced, averting his eyes and gripping his friend's shoulder. He couldn't bear to look him in the face. Every glance seemed to bring an invisible set of hands to his chest, crushing his lungs until he couldn't breathe. The pain was astounding, yet Axel could only accept that he deserved every bit of it.

He reluctantly traipsed back to the door, following Saïx into the hall and leaving Roxas behind, alone and confused as he ever was. The very instant the door was closed, Axel reached for the collar of Saïx's coat and held him in place, closing in on him until only inches separated their eyes.

"All right, tell me what was so 'urgent' and 'confidential' that you had to—"

"Lea, what the hell were you doing?" Saïx interrupted in a hushed tone, shrugging out of Axel's grip.

"None of your damn business, that's what."

"It's far too risky to share such information with him. You know that."

"I'm not so sure!" Axel began to pace, using all of his self control to keep from knocking the man senseless. "Last time I kept it from him and he took off! You don't think maybe knowing the truth would at least ease his mind?"

"It would just give him one more reason not to trust us."

"He already doesn't trust us! And he has no reason to! All this secrecy is just making him more suspicious and resentful. That's human nature, Saïx!"

"Roxas isn't human. None of us are human. Now keep your voice down or he'll hear you."

Axel shouted even louder in response. "Let him hear me!"

Saïx huffed. "Damn it, Lea, can not one plan run its course without your interference?"

"Plenty! But not the ones that involve my friends. I stood by and let the Organization destroy someone I cared about once already. I'm not letting it happen again!"

Axel stomped a few feet away and leaned against the wall. There was a rapid fluttering in his chest and heat was rising up his neck and to his ears. He waited for Saïx to respond while he caught his breath. Surely the man knew who he'd been referring to, but he said nothing at all. Axel figured he ought not be surprised. Saïx had quite a talent for dodging sentiment and avoiding even the slightest glimpse of emotion, even if he hurt his friends in the process. Why should he show any attachment now?

"You fought with him," Axel muttered, hoping to be told it wasn't true.

Saïx's reply was calm and matter-of-fact. "Yes, I did."

"Trying to stop him leaving?" Axel shot him a look of scorn, prompting Saïx to roll his eyes.

"I failed, if that's any consolation."

"It's not."

"I was doing my job, Lea."

"That's 'Axel' to you."

"Fine, Axel," he growled through his teeth. "It wasn't personal. The Organization needs a Keyblade Wielder, and the only one we had was about to walk right out our doors."

Axel scoffed, clenching his fists as he approached the man. "He's just a kid, and you attacked him? You couldn't just restrain him and drag him back?"

"Could you?"

Axel was thrown off by the unexpected parry to his interrogation. He stared at his old friend with his mouth hanging open in shock. The attack was deliberate and calculated. The words stung sharply, and Saïx knew it. There was no trace of remorse in him as he continued to defend himself.

"Roxas is not 'just a kid.' He's extremely powerful, and he took me completely by surprise. He delivered a hell of a beating that day. I was sore for over a week."

Axel grunted with satisfaction. "Serves you right. You could have hurt him."

His comrade's sinister, yellow eyes narrowed. "I barely laid a scratch on him. It's more than anyone can say for you."

Enraged, Axel took him by the collar again, slamming him into the wall. He couldn't speak. He couldn't even think. He could only feel, and what he felt was hotter than any fire he'd ever cast. He waited, daring Saïx to provoke him further, but the man seemed totally unconcerned by the assault. Once again having failed to intimidate him, Axel let him go. The pain inside him only intensified. He clutched his chest, turning away to conceal it from Saïx.

"I must say," the smirk was audible in Saïx's voice. "It's touching to see you so concerned for the welfare of your friends."

The taunting nearly set him off, and before he'd had a chance to compose himself, Axel whipped around, pleading with his former friend. "Would you just drop it? That's not what this is about."

"Then enlighten me."

For a moment, Axel considered that maybe he should. Maybe Saïx really was completely clueless. But it didn't matter. There was no getting through to him, and Axel didn't have the spoons to try anymore. "I've got nothing else to say."

"Don't walk away from me again, Lea."

Axel had finally turned to go, only to be stopped in his tracks by a voice that didn't belong to Saïx. It was familiar. Nostalgic. That voice was Isa. Axel turned to find the source staring at him with that same flash in his eyes. He saw the feeling, the memories, the humanity. The pain.

"How many more times do I have to watch you leave? Why do you toy with me like I can't feel it? When will it be enough for you?"

Axel took slow steps in his direction, as if cautiously approaching an animal that he didn't want to startle for fear it would run away. "I thought you didn't have a heart to break."

"I don't. Not anymore," Saïx dropped his head, as if staring longingly at his own empty chest. "But I have a vivid recollection of that very sensation."

Axel's steady trek toward him neither sped up nor slowed. His stone expression didn't waver in the slightest. Saïx only stood there and watched the distance shrink between them, waiting to see which man would break first.

"I feel nothing. I love nothing. I hate nothing. I am nothing. All I could claim was my purpose," Saïx's words began to shake. "I never stopped fighting for that purpose, but that purpose stopped fighting for me."

Having finally reached him, Axel placed his hands on his shoulders. "Isa, I tried. I walked away because you pushed me away. What was I supposed to do?"

"Lea, you haven't any clue what I've been through."
"Then just tell me! I'm listening!"

"You wouldn't understand."

"Why not? Why wouldn't I understand?"

In a most poetic gesture, Saïx pushed Axel off of him and backed away. His guard was reinstated and Isa disappeared back into the shadows. Axel reached for him, hoping to coax him back out, but Saïx recoiled and closed himself off. Ready to admit defeat, Axel cast one last line, begging the man to bite.

"If you want me to stay, give me a reason to stay."

A long silence followed. "What would you have me do, Lea?" Saïx whispered. "I can't grow it back. All I have left are the memories."

"Then use them."

He shook his head, never lifting his eyes from the floor to face the man he was rejecting again. "I can't."

Axel had sustained a number of injuries in his career with the Organization. He'd broken plenty of bones, been cut practically to shreds, and been burned by more magical attacks than he could count. He could clearly remember the pain of losing his own heart — both the physical agony of the keyblade in his chest and the emotional torment of loss and grief when he realized it was gone. He was no stranger to wounds or to pain. But none of the broken bones or lacerations, none of the burns, none of the agony compared to this moment. Axel and Saïx were through years ago, but it was only now that it had hit him. The severance of their bond was excruciating, more so than severing any limb might be.

Axel's throat was clenching so tightly that he could barely breathe. His eyes felt heavy. Unwilling to open himself up to any more of the man's scrutiny over his emotional behavior, Axel swallowed hard and turned to finally leave Saïx alone.

"Let me know when you figure it out."