Chained and Free

Her cheeks hurt. Never in her life had Iris smiled for so long that her cheek muscles actually ached and prompted her to rub them to alleviate the soreness. But sitting across from BT as he regaled stories of some of the things he'd gotten into over the years had her nearly hyperventilating. He seemed to have one goal in mind, and that was to make her laugh as much as he could before they needed to part ways. "Barry wasn't happy, I nearly broke my nose that time," he went on, explaining when he was trying to do something called parkour and had misjudged a distance between two stone pillars.

"I can't even imagine how much that must have hurt," Iris stuttered out with a hand over her mouth to hide the fact that she hadn't been able to swallow her bite of pizza because of her laughing.

"Exactly why I never tried it again," he agreed with her off-hand as he lifted his glass of coke in a mock-cheer. Iris, still smiling, did the same before taking a careful sip to finally swallow the bite of pizza that had been caught in her cheek while laughing. "Didn't stop me from working out, though."

"I at least hope you're more careful now," she added on, lifting her slice up to bite into the crust, the last of the slice that remained.

BT leaned back in his seat and clapped his hand over his heart. "I am. Scouts honour."

Iris discretely raised an eyebrow as she swallowed her bite. "Were any of you actually in the scouts?" she pondered, to which BT just offered a crooked grin and a wink as he dropped his hand and picked up another slice of their pizza. Iris knew that she wasn't going to be able to eat anymore after this slice, having only the appetite for two, but BT was already half-way through his forth as she wiped the grease from her fingers.

"No wonder you're so skinny, you don't eat anything!" BT pointed out once he'd polished off his piece, wiping of his hands as well.

Iris just shrugged her boney shoulders. She'd never really eaten a lot, even before she ran away from home. It was just how she was built; a small amount of food kept her well-fed and energized for enough time to go by before she ate again. Kevin's body was large enough and the alters kept it in good shape, so they probably needed to eat a lot more to keep their physique.

"Just the way I am," she answered. "It makes it much easier when I need to get groceries, since a small amount last me for about two weeks when I'm careful. If you all buy groceries the same way Luke does, it's a wonder you can afford it."

BT snorted at the mention of the other man. "Luke's got no clue what he's doing when it's his turn to do the shopping. This guy will just remember things that everyone's had in the past and buy whatever comes to mind; usually means he's just getting a bunch of junk. I'm pretty sure he spent over a hundred dollars in the snack aisle alone, and forgot to get things like bread, or fruit."

Iris grinned as she thought back to the amount of junkfood that was in his cart; however, she had also spotted a couple of healthier foods, like a bag of apples and some bananas. "Well, you guys are the ones who make him go."

BT let out a groan of complaint as his head dropped back to land on the wall behind his seat—he was too tall for it to hit the cushioned back to their seats. "Don't remind me. And we never learn, either. We always think he'll remember better from the last time, but we're wrong."

Shaking her head, Iris couldn't believe the normalcy that came about when bringing up another one of the personalities in Kevin's body. It was easy to forget that they all shared a body; the way they acted and spoke about one another made it truly seem like they were all individual people, living their everyday lives separately yet in the same home. She never would have been able to guess that this was what it would be like to meet someone with D.I.D, let alone for it to be her soulmates.

Before they could continue the conversation, one of the younger guys that worked there came up to their table, noticing that they had stopped eating the pizza from where he had taken over behind the counter. "Hey, you guys want a to-go box for the rest of that?" he asked with a nod to the remaining half of their pizza.

"Yea, could you divide it into two for us?" BT asked before Iris had a chance to speak, causing her to straighten in surprise. She didn't even get a chance to protest before BT pointed at her in silent warning, mirth colouring his features. "No, you're taking half."

Pursing her lips and holding his stare, she only lasted for two seconds before huffing and leaning back in surrender. The worker chuckled before he collected the pan from the table and took it behind the counter to box up for them. "You eat more than me; I didn't need half of it."

"What kind of gentleman would I be?" he retorted with a smirk.

"Well, you did pay for the entire thing," Iris pointed out, but BT just waved his hand as though to push the comment aside. So far, she hadn't won a single thing when it came to their mini-arguments. She had a strong feeling that the score wasn't to change any time soon. "Thank you, BT. Dinner was amazing; I hadn't had pizza in a while and this was perfect."

BT's expression softened as he gazed into the gentleness of her eyes, knowing how dangerous it could be to get lost in them. "Any time, doll. And I mean that."

Their food was brought back in take-away containers, like mini-pizza boxes, and the two stood up to leave. Iris pulled her coat back on, preparing to head back out into the chill of the day, especially now that it had gotten later and most likely cooler. "You got work again tomorrow?" BT asked as he took the two boxes while she pulled on her gloves.

"Yea, another morning shift," she answered, some of the fatigue entering her tone. "Hopefully a dull day, after this morning," she added on a moment later, smiling to him as they made their way in the direction of the exit. BT made sure to wave at the man behind the counter, shouting a farewell and receiving one in return. "What about you? Work tomorrow?"

"Yea, Barry's got a meeting or something so all the luck to him," he answered easily, having no problem referring to the other alter like it was an everyday occurrence. Although, she supposed that for them it would be.

Iris stuck close to BT as they made their way back in the direction of her apartment, passing her work and all of the other people making their way home for the evening. The conversation between them was light, keeping away from any topics that may dampen the mood from the evening. She deliberately kept away from mentioning work as often as possible, since she noticed it caused him to tense and glare briefly ahead every time he thought about what had happened at her work. He, in turn, avoided bringing up topics pertaining to family and growing up with soulmarks. She didn't outwardly react when such things came up, but he could see it in her eyes that it was drawing dark memories to the surface.

Neither wanted the other to have anything but pleasant thoughts, enjoying the remainder of their time together.

"Thank you for dinner," Iris began with a smile as they approached her building. "And for…everything else."

BT's expression softened as he stopped just shy of her building's front entrance. He wanted so badly for the evening to continue, but they both had responsibilities that they couldn't just forget or put aside. "You've made my life worth it, doll. Especially when I get to see that smile." His admission brought a luminous flush to her cheeks, prompting her to duct her head in embarrassment. "Now, now, none of that."

Shaking her head and trying to relieve the heat in her face, Iris inhaled deeply and stepped forward with whatever courage was left in her. Wrapping her arms tightly around BT's middle, the man was frozen in surprise as she gave him a tight hug, the first touch that she had initiated since they'd met. "Goodnight, BT."

Finally moving, BT returned her embrace and pulled her in even closer as one of his hands stroked along the back of her head. Her hair was soft to the touch, like silk beneath his hand. "'Night, Doll. Sleep well."

Drawing back from one another, Iris peeked up at him through her eyelashes, the ghost of a smile still on her lips, before she turned to head inside with her half of their leftovers. BT remained where he was standing, watching her through the glass window of the door as she turned to the stairwell. Casting one more glance in his direction, he immediately lifted his hand to wave. Her smile bloomed full again as she waved in answer before ducking quickly into the stairwell and out of sight.

BT smiled to himself while turning back the way they'd come, heading toward the zoo. "Oh, we're in trouble now," he muttered to himself, thinking of their little soulmate.

Iris was smiling her entire trip up the stairs, her mood having improved drastically since that morning. BT did an amazing job of taking the edge off of her fear, leaving her feeling safe even after an altercation that was advancing into the physical. Cheeks aching from smiling so long, the taste of pizza still on her tongue and the memory of BT's warmth as she hugged him goodnight were all too good to forget or dampen her mood.

Until she arrived at her apartment.

Stopping short at her door, Iris's face paled at a piece of paper taped to her door. Keep them covered.

She knew that writing. It was her father's writing; messy and thick, in permanent marker with significant pressure behind the writing utensil. Glancing quickly down the hall in fright, there was no one else out of their homes. Even though she knew she was alone, the hairs on the back of her neck stood on end and Iris quickly ripped the paper from the door, leaving behind the tape and a tiny tear from the page. Darting into her apartment through the minimal space she allowed it to open, the frightened woman immediately turned and began sliding locks into place.

It took significantly longer than usual, her hands shaking terribly and causing her fingers to fumble with the thin locks.

She could hear the shake of her breath through the pounding of her heart; any other outside sound was blocked out. Stepping away after the last lock slid into place, Iris turned to examine her apartment. The rush of blood made it difficult, however, as the edge of her vision blackened and blurred.

Her legs gave out as she approached her bed, leaving her knees to hit the floor with a slam that ricocheted up her bones. She barely felt the pain, however, as her hands slammed against the bed in a desperate attempt to catch herself. Throat tight and lungs burning like they were filled with acid, Iris could feel the terrifying chill beginning to spread up to her cheeks as she struggled against her own body's reaction.

Breathe. I can't breathe.

From her knees to her hip, Iris's fisted hands tugged her comforter from the bed as she fell, trying desperately to keep herself up in some way. It was useless. Her overactive breathing was taking control, the panic from years and years of memories and fear, all coming back, became too much. Too much. The crinkle of paper from the note still clutched in her hand penetrated her senses, barely audible through the rush of blood and air, but just enough.

Keep them covered.

Her marks. She'd been careless. At ease with her soulmates, she'd become careless and let herself relax enough to not worry. To not fear. It was the fear that had gotten her this far; fears had kept her safe all these years.

Her back hit the floor as her heavy, hyperactive breaths became distraught wheezes. One hand gripping the paper tight enough to rip and tear it, the other gripping the blanket for some kind of desperate leverage, then Iris's vision faded out completely.

BT stopped in the middle of the street, an odd discomfort starting in his chest. He didn't see the man with angry, whiskey eyes as he marched passed from the direction of his soulmate's apartment.

Iris whimpered as her father tightened her scarf around her neck to a dangerous degree; she could feel the uncomfortable press against her trachea that caused her breaths to wheeze suddenly. "How many times have I told you? Huh? Keep this damn thing on, or wear the turtlenecks we gave you!"

"I…I'm sorry. I was hot," Iris tried to explain, her voice small and pained as she looked down at the floor beneath her father's leather shoes.

"Shut up," he snapped, preventing her from going any further. "You think I care? I don't. If those damn words hadn't appeared, you wouldn't have to do this now would you?"

She knew not to speak against her father, it would end badly, but the words left before her young mind thought the action through, "I don't control them, I didn't make it happen."

It didn't take more than a split second for her to regret ever opening her mouth—she should have stayed silent; she'd known to stay silent but for some stupid reason she'd spoken anyway. In the next instant, her father's hand flew across her cheek with such force that she was turned and thrown backward, colliding with the doorframe to the dining room. Her eyebrow split upon impact with the corner of the wood as blood welled to the surface instantly. It was hot against her skin, like someone was pouring hot syrup down her face.

The feeling was frighteningly familiar by that point.

"Howard!" her mother shrieked, spotting the blood as Iris dazedly sat on the floor with tears burning in her eyes. A smear of blood on the pristine white of the doorframe marked where her head had struck. "You idiot. How are we going to explain that!" her mother demanded, marching over to Iris and grabbing her upper arm roughly to pull her up from the floor. She didn't care if she caused bruises. Her arms could be covered, those bruises could be hidden.

Her cheek and eyebrow could not.

"Fucking brat was talking back. You know I won't stand for any of her bullshit!"

Iris was manhandled less than pleasantly in the direction of the bathroom, her mother still shouting at her father. She had school the next day, and she had already been called in sick too many times for people not to begin to suspect. The physical pain was terrible; her head was throbbing and her eye burned where some blood had gotten into it from the split in her brow—she could feel it beginning to swell around the cut. She could already feel her cheek swelling and it was obvious to her that a bruise was soon to form as well.

The internal pain, the emotion pain, was worse. Her parents did not care one bit that their daughter was bruised and bleeding; they were worried about getting caught as the cause for her injuries. She was a hated freak in her family, meant to be barely seen, never heard, and surely never remembered.

She had no friends to go to, no family that cared, and no soulmates to match the many marks littering her body.

The pounding in her head was one of the first things that she noticed. Her mouth was uncomfortably dry, with her tongue was stuck to the roof of her mouth, and her world spun like she'd been drinking for hours. The second thing she noticed was the shriek of her phone's ring, distant and muffled against her spinning senses. The phone remained where she had left it in her bag, which was sitting just next to her front door.

Opening her eyes slowly, and painfully, Iris winced at the seemingly booming volume of her phone. Having been lying on the floor, her back ached and she knew that her knees were going to be bruised from the earlier impact. Even though her breathing and blood-pressure seemed to have evened out once she'd fallen unconscious, Iris could feel her heart beginning to speed in her chest once more. The fear was coming back, gripping her like a monster determined to drag her into the darkness.

Rolling slowly onto her side, Iris flinched at the crumple of paper still in her palm. Chucking the ruined note away from her as though it was aflame, she turned her attention to her discarded bag. Digging into the pockets, she produced her phone only a moment too late as the ringing finally ceased. The caller's identification was still across the screen, however, and Iris swallowed thickly at the 'unknown name, unknown number' that glared back at her.

She didn't receive random calls from those who weren't on her contacts. It wasn't something that she did. And even though she'd given her number to Barry, she'd only kept in contact with him and the other alters via email. Curling onto her side and tiredly drawing her knees up into her chest, Iris released a shuddering breath while attempting to keep herself from having a repeat attack.

Her father had been in her building.

Somehow, without her noticing, he'd been lurking around her like a shadow and had seen her expose her marks. Most likely, he now knew she'd met her soulmates—or in his mind, one of her soulmates. It wasn't likely that he'd realized her soulmate was a sufferer of D.I.D, and therefore combined all twenty-three into one physical body.

A buzz from her phone had her looking down at the device in her hand. The icon for a voicemail was at the top of the screen, setting her heart into immediate overdrive. She did not want to press it. She did not want to know who was calling. Yet, in the same instant, she desperately wished that if she listened to the message it might prove that it was just a wrong number, or a marketer trying to get her money.

Drawing herself slowly into a sitting position while she pulled her comforter around herself—even still wearing her coat and gloves—for warmth and childish reassurance, Iris tapped the icon to open her voicemail.

Entering her passcode and listening to the faint tone that came before a robotic female voice, declaring one new message, Iris tapped on the screen again to listen.

"Keep them covered. Don't make me tell you again."

Gasping in near pain as the phone fell from her hand, Iris leaned back against her heavily as her eyes immediately burned with tears of fear and pain. "I can't do this again," she sobbed to herself, hands immediately clawing into her hair. The scars her body bore had made her strong, that was the truth, but there was nothing else in this world that she feared more than her parents.

Especially her father.

Near the end of living with them, she'd been getting big enough that she could push back against her mother. She could slap her hands away, run before she caught up. Her father, on the other hand, would always be too big for her. He could grab her by one arm and lift her clear off her feet. He'd done it before, throwing her around like she was nothing more than a ragdoll.

"I can't," she sobbed, curling in on herself more tightly. "I can't, I can't, I can't."

I can't, I'm so sorry but I can't.

Her words to Barry were a haunting memory now, and she hated remembering that she had said that to him. However, it was a dark, glaring window into her mind most of the time.

To think she could be happy. Finding her first soulmate, with two more to follow, she'd thought that the pain of her life was in the past. It had been a serious error on her part to think that she'd be able to just be happy, to finally have the life she used to dream about as a child. Those dreams were what inspired her to run away in the first place. And the torment of living on the streets, her parents nowhere in sight, had given her enough time to think that she was free.

She didn't know how long they'd been aware of her, how long they'd known exactly where she was, but it terrified Iris to think that all along, while she'd been under the assumption that her parents were one of the few frights she didn't need to worry about, they'd been right there.

Her nightmares were coming back. Her monsters were emerging from the shadows right when she'd begun to let her guards down.

She didn't notice the email icon the popped up on her phones screen, taking over where the voicemail notification had been.