Despite knowing that he needed to tell Private the truth, Rico didn't know how to broach the topic. Skipper and Kowalski trailed them for days, mostly after learning Antarctican, but Rico knew there was more to it than that. He could see the shadows in their eyes, the distrust. It was understandable, considering that out of all their team, Rico was the most likely to disobey orders. He could tell that they knew they hadn't gotten through to him in the conversation. But they also knew that they couldn't keep the two of them separated forever.

So Rico laid low for a couple weeks and became the soldier he knew Skipper would want. He obeyed every order and avoided Private unless he was around the other two. His two commanding officers began to relax, and soon their dynamic was close to how it used to be. Everything was going swimmingly until the day the picture came, carried by a pigeon.

"Men! Front and center!" Skipper barked, his eyes glued to the page.

They assembled instantly, saluting their commander. "What is it, Skipper?" Kowalski asked.

"Blowhole! That fiend! That ruffian! He's got them holed up!"

"Them, Skipper?"

"Manfredi and Johnson!"

Rico's stomach dropped and he gasped, stepping back and breaking the line. Images from his past flooded his mind, followed by sensations. Hot and cold swept his body and he barely stayed standing. He forced himself to watch Kowalski and Private hurry over to Skipper, begging for more information.

None of them noticed his panic attack, and he forced himself to focus on the warmth of the sun on his head, the breeze ruffling his feathers. He focused on his teammates, noting their unique features, the way they pinched with worry. A familiar hatred welled up inside of him, a hatred so dark that it was stickier than his hatred for his brute of a father. He had never thought to hate somebody more than him, but he did.

"Rico?" Private asked, and Rico fought the wave of nausea to look at the innocent face.

"Hm?" he grunted.

"Are you okay?"

Rico nodded once then turned away and dove into the chilled waters of their habitat. He swam to the bottom, holding his breath. He needed to think, needed time to process the information, but most of all, he needed to tell Skipper, Kowalski, and Private the truth about Manfredi and Johnson.

'But how?' he wondered, tears stinging his eyes. His scar burned as if the knife were still dragging through his flesh, reopening his fighting wound. A touch to his shoulder startled him, and he turned to see Private, who smiled and pointed upward. After a moment's hesitation, he followed and jumped onto the platform, facing his commanding officers. He couldn't imagine the look that must have been on his face, but his superiors actually looked concerned.

"Rico," Skipper began, taking a few steps closer. He paused then embraced him briefly. "It wasn't your fault that Blowhole got them. We can still save them. They're still alive, Rico."

'That's not the problem, Skipper!' Rico wanted to scream. 'They're the enemy! They did things, horrible things! They're WORKING WITH BLOWHOLE!'

But not one word could escape his beak, not even in his own tongue. His entire body quaked, and he stared with eyes that were suddenly full of tears. He let out a strangled noise that was loud enough that most of the zoo went quiet, from the animals to the people. With no other warning, he threw his head back and shrieked, grabbing his skull as memories threatened to overwhelm him. He could hear people calling for a zookeeper, but he couldn't stop. He writhed and screamed, clutching his face as the memory of pouring blood and searing agony overwhelmed him.

"Make it stop! Make it stop! Oh, Icza, goddess of ice, make it STOP!" he bellowed, but there was no answer.

xxxxxxxxxxxxxxx

Private stood behind Skipper and Kowalski, numb with shock. Rico was being carried away by the zoo vet. He had shrieked so loudly and writhed so energetically that he had actually been tranquilized. Skipper's face was set, but there were shock and concern in his eyes. Kowalski watched with beak agape as their companion was taken into the clinic and out of sight.

The zoo was emptied within an hour and closed early. As soon as all the humans left, Marlene hopped their enclosure, followed by the lemurs.

"What was all that crazy with the explodey penguin?" Julien demanded; his voice lacked his usual pep.

"Classified," Skipper murmured.

"Is he going to be alright?" Marlene asked, tugging on her whiskers nervously. "I mean, that's not normal, even for him."

"I…I don't know," Kowalski said. "Skipper and I knew he blamed himself, but that was…strange."

"Blamed himself for what?" Maurice asked.

"Classified," Skipper said a little more forcefully.

Private waddled away as they began to argue about the 'stupid classification system,' and he sat down on the edge of their platform. He didn't know what to think about what had happened, what he'd seen, what he'd felt during Rico's breakdown. Flashes of what could only be memories had passed before his eyes, memories that weren't his, but what they showed was horrifying. He didn't want to think about them, afraid that they would sharpen into focus and he would find out…

Find out what? He knew there was something in the flurry of images and physical sensations that he had noticed, that was important in some way, but they had gone by so fast, full of movement and other things that made him shudder. He felt something rubbing his face, and he looked down to find his own flipper massaging the left side of his beak. That wasn't his habit. It was Rico's, and it confirmed that what he'd seen were memories from some traumatic incident in the older penguin's past.

Unwilling to delve into the terrible images, Private stood up and waddled back over to Skipper as Marlene and the lemurs left in a huff.

"Permission to make a love smoothie, sir?" he asked, his voice hollow.

Skipper and Kowalski blinked then turned to him. "We've had an awful lot lately," Skipper said, but there was no anger in his tone.

"I think you'd better make it three. We'll check on Rico tonight," Kowalski said, usurping Skipper in a rare show of leadership.

Private nodded and opened the hatch, gesturing for his commanding officers to go first before following them down, his mind a swirl of pain and anger that wasn't his.