'Healing the Moon'
RenjixByakuya
I OWN NOTHING! Also, I know I'm not spelling some stuff right, I've just gotten comfy writing riatsu instead of reiatsu or whatever
Chapter 2: In the Office
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Previously, on 'Healing the Moon':
((Not looking at him, Byakuya replied softly,"What the monkey does not realize is that while the moon appears whole, it is actually broken into a thousand pieces beyond repair...and so is not worth catching."
Then his captain was gone.))
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(Wednesday Morning- the next few chaps take place over the course of Wed)
Byakuya was at his desk even earlier than usual the next morning. After his encounter with his second-in-command last night, he'd returned to his lonely home, unconsciously resenting the solitude. His staff tended to keep to their quarters when their duties were done, and whenever Rukia was in, she usually stayed in the suite of rooms she had picked as her own. This left Byakuya to his own devices most of the time.
He'd been unable to sleep, tossing and turning as images of bronze eyes and crimson hair chased his mind in confusing circles. This is why he now stared at his desk without seeing the cursed thing, his tired mind still stumbling in circles that revolved around the Rukon Dog.
Though, he supposed, perhaps that wasn't quite as bad as nightmares invading his sleep.
He gave a soft sigh, tracing the edge of his desk with one slim finger. He was quite sure that when Renji had asked about the monkey fable last night, the younger man hadn't actually been talking about the story. So when he'd replied to the redhead's question, it had been the first thing that came to mind. The damn moon wasn't really what was broken, and he wondered if Renji could've possibly understood...
With a frown, he struggled to refocus on the paperwork and duties that had kept him from losing his mind over the last century, trying not to think about that bright smile or intense auburn eyes...damn, he was doing it again!
"Sir?"
Byakuya's head snapped up to see the torture known as his lieutenant standing in the doorway of the office.
~X~X~X~X~
Renji noticed how his captain's shoulders squared at his appearance, tensing as if for battle. Those dark violet-steel eyes narrowed dangerously, but Renji's attention was captured by the shadows under them. The noble looked exhausted. Had Byakuya not slept well?
Feeling a tug of worry, Renji stepped further into the room, asking softly, "Captain, are you ok? You... you look kinda tired."
The platinum eyes narrowed further and his superior snapped, "I am fine, Lieutenant Abarai. It is none of your concern."
Taken aback by the vicious tone, Renji felt his spine stiffen defensively. Geez, see where concern got him? It probably would've hurt less if the ravenette had just slapped him. After last night, he thought it'd be ok to at least ask if his commanding officer was doing alright! What an arrogant...
Renji clenched his jaw against the sharp retort growling in his chest, words that would surely be considered insubordination and get him in trouble. He barely managed to get out some words that sounded half-way respectful. "Of course it's not, sir. Forgive me. I'll find some duties elsewhere for now and stay out of your way."
Without waiting for a reply of any kind, he spun and headed for the door, his steps just short of running. He was not fleeing, dammit! But he could feel his spiritual pressure fluctuating, and he knew that could give him away to anyone that could read riatsu... like his captain. He had to get out of here, get somewhere where he could get a handle on his shit before all his secrets came out.
~X~X~X~X~
Byakuya tensed as spiritual pressure began flaring off of Renji in waves. The younger man was usually good at keeping his energy controlled, but now it lashed through the room, raising the fine hairs on the back of Byakuya's neck.
His lieutenant was striding towards the door, and Byakuya didn't realize he'd planned on speaking until the words "Wait, Lieutenant Abarai." had fallen from his lips.
The Rukon Dog froze mid-stride, hand outstretched for the door. Byakuya could sense that the younger man was desperately trying to rein in his energy, but it was like trying to stop a storm.
Byakuya frowned thoughtfully; nobody lost control of their riatsu to this extent without reason. In an effort to find out what was disturbing his subordinate, he closed his eyes to focus on the energy flooding the office.
First off, it was at a similar level to when Renji was engaged in full battle, fierce and wild. Cords of aggression radiated from the man by the door, spreading along the floor, walls, and ceiling. Anger, frustration, resentment... pain. Such unbearable, soul-deep agony.
Why? What force could possibly hurt the brash, cocky redhead?
Just as Byakuya asked himself this, an image of Renji when he'd snapped at him passed through his mind. Renji had only asked if he was ok, and had been affected by his vicious reply. There had been hurt in the dark amber eyes, and he had taken no notice until now.
Byakuya tensed as the waves of energy surged closer, surrounding him. He realized that the closer the spiritual pressure came, the softer and lighter it became. The aggression faded, leaving pain in the feathery strands that coiled passively around him. As the aggression faded from the tangible energy, other feelings made themselves known. Linked with the pain was worry and concern, and a sort of tenderness Byakuya wouldn't have expected from the fiery Rukon Dog.
The energy was stopping a few inches from his skin; even as it surrounded him, the younger man's spiritual pressure was refusing to make contact, leaving the noble with only vague impressions of fear... and want. Byakuya frowned; what did his subordinate really want?
Curiosity got the better of him, and he impulsively raised a hand and thrust it into the drifting threads of energy. Byakuya gasped as, for the first time, he realized what Renji really felt.
Everything flooded forth, overwhelming him. Desire, strong and fiery, washed over his skin, passion that made his heart pound. Renji wanted him, more than he'd ever wanted anything in his life.
At the same time, the fierce, almost possessive passion was tempered by tenderness and a powerful need to protect. Fear and pain were still deeply entwined in the energy; his lieutenant wanted him, but was far too afraid of him to do anything about it, and it was hurting the warrior's soul. The Rukon Dog's spirit was breaking.
With a gasp, Byakuya jerked backwards, away from the bigger Soul Reaper's riatsu, as painful, frightening memories unburied themselves to strike him.
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Renji was barely breathing, frozen in the same damn spot. He hadn't moved a hair since his captain had said 'wait', so he was still staring at the door. He frantically tried to restrain his spiritual pressure, but it kept slipping out of his control like water.
He prayed Byakuya wouldn't attempt to read his energy; there was no telling what secrets he'd decipher. Then something unexpected happened - he felt Byakuya actually touch the strands of riatsu. He heard the smallest gasp, and knew that the older man was reading him like a book.
Fuck! Renji bowed his head in defeat, knowing the proud noble would probably be disgusted. Then he heard another gasp, and the clatter of a chair falling over just as his energy was relinquished.
Alarmed, he looked over his shoulder, only to see something that damn near broke his heart. His captain was standing against the wall behind his desk, staring at him. There was no disgust in the wide silver-violet eyes, but something far worse. Fear. Byakuya looked terrified, as if he expected Renji to do something awful to him.
Renji felt guilt flood him, even though he didn't understand why his powerful superior would be frightened. He started to step towards the ravenette, just wanting to make that scared look go away. "Captain Ku-" he cut off when the noble pressed harder against the wall and made a tiny noise like a whimper. Renji froze, holding his hands where Byakuya could see them.
He wondered what he could have possibly done to make his captain act like a cornered, abused animal. But whatever it was, it had to be his fault.
"I... I'm so sorry, Captain." he whispered, lowering his eyes to the floor. "I'm gonna, umm, take a sick day. I'll be back when you've got my transfer set up."
He backed away until he hit the door, surprised to hear Byakuya's voice.
"Tra-transfer?"
He nodded, still not looking at his captain... his moon. "I'm not stupid; there ain't no way you still want me in your squad."
He turned and slipped out the door, not hearing his name breathed into the office.
~X~X~X~X~
"Renji." Byakuya breathed as he slid down the wall to sit on the floor. Transfer? Where the hell had that come from? He most certainly had not been thinking of transferring his lieutenant. He sighed and leaned his head against his knees. The memories that had hit him, made him cower from the Rukon Dog... memories of pain and fear. He had not been able to explain to Renji what was wrong, but feeling that fierce desire from the younger man, and his buried memories rushing at him... for a moment, he'd been terrified that the bigger Soul Reaper was going to do the same thing.
But Byakuya had seen the confusion and crushed devastation in those coppery eyes; Renji had never intended to frighten him, much less harm him. Byakuya took several deep, steadying breaths and forced himself to focus on everything he'd felt in his subordinate's riatsu.
The desire, the consuming passion- he clenched his jaw against the thought that Renji would vent these on him against his will.
Fear and pain- this made his chest tighten as he realized he was responsible for the presence of these; he did not want Renji to be afraid of him, nor did he want to cause the younger man to suffer.
Tenderness and a need to protect- Byakuya gasped and pushed himself to his feet. Renji wanted to protect him, he would never hurt him. And now the Rukon Dog thought he didn't want him in his squad anymore!
Trying to compose himself, the Squad 6 Captain left orders for his Third-Seat and followed the faint path of distraught riatsu as quickly as he could. He had to make this right!
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Alrighty, 2 chappies down! Boy, Bya sure is acting odd! I'm pretty sure I'm making it clear what his problem is, but in case I was too subtle, Renji figures it out next chap. BTW Bya's reaction to Renji liking him was for the same reason this fic is gonna take a bit to get to any citrusy stuff.
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Next time on 'HtM'- Chapter 3: Byakuya's Truth