Healing the Moon

by YaoiHime420

Renji knows he is the monkey - always chasing the moon, but never able to capture it. What will the monkey do when he discovers that the moon is broken and not as out-of-reach as he's always thought? YAOI

9. Renji's Story

'Healing the Moon'
RenjixByakuya

Chapter 9: Renji's Story

Warnings: First off, I think I forgot to put warnings earlier in this story :( My bad, I will go fix that soon.
Warnings for this one: Reference to past abuse! Dirty talk, naughty behavior and sexual acts YAY!

x
Previously, on 'Healing the Moon':
((The older man looked confused, so Renji elaborated. "Just about anyone you know that grew up Rukon... there's a good chance they had at least one similar experience."))
x

Byakuya felt his eyes widen at the words his lieutenant spoke. The younger man appeared calm, but he could sense an undercurrent of pain. His companion spoke again, voice hardening. "Not Rukia, though. It was my job to protect her, so if someone seemed interested in her, I... distracted them. No matter what I went through, even if it was the same day or the same hour, I'd take anything intended for her." Fierce auburn eyes met his. "She does not know any of this, Byakuya."

Hearing what had not been said, Byakuya shook his head, whispering, "I won't tell. Your story is safe with me, as mine is with you."

The crimsonette gave a short nod. "Sometimes, it was forced, other times it'd be a way of getting food. Like, there was this guy that sold bread and vegetables at the docks. If you went to him in the evenings and let him do whatever he wanted for an hour or so, he'd give you some of the stuff he hadn't sold that day. Sometimes, it was a punishment if you got caught stealing from a street vendor, or as payment for medical treatment, but nobody was nice about it."

Byakuya saw the dark amber eyes slide away from his as his partner continued in a whisper. "There are a lot of people out in Hanging Dog and the other districts. Honestly, I've lost count of how many times... how many people... and it was over the course of about 3 years. From 13 to 16... by the time I was 17, I was big and strong enough to fuck up anyone who came near me or Rukia."

Horrified by the thought of his wonderful, kind-hearted Renji being treated like that, Byakuya was unable to stop the furious flare of spiritual pressure he released, raging against these unknown assailants who had dared to defile the Rukon Dog.

He was surprised when his subordinate flinched away from him and his angry riatsu. "Fuck! Calm down, Taicho! That don't feel good, you know!"

Mortified that he'd just lost control like that, and that his innocent partner had been on the receiving end of his pissed-off energy, Byakuya quickly reined in his riatsu. "I'm sorry, Re-"

The younger man waved an unsteady hand at him, trying to smile even as sweatdrops appeared on his face. "It's alright, baby. Sorry I yelled. When you're mad, your spiritual pressure hurts. But, it does kinda feel nice that you'd get that mad over what happened to me. Even in our fights, I don't think I've ever felt you quite so... furious."

Byakuya lowered his eyes and took a deep breath. "I know what you mean by it feeling nice that I got angry. Yesterday, it was comforting to sense the rage you felt over me getting hurt."

He heard Renji reply softly. "Then I'm glad I comforted you. You want some tea now?"
He nodded, and his companion got up to get it. He glanced up when his host returned with the tea. Renji sat down and spoke quietly. "What I went through... I don't really have a specific story like you do, cause my situations kept changing. But I'll tell you whatever you wanna know, and since we started this conversation cause of reactions, I can tell you more about mine if you want."

Byakuya tilted his head, speaking gently. "Only if you're ok with telling me. It helps to know I'm not alone, but I do not want you to tell me if it will upset you."

The crimsonette shook his head, his tone calmer than before. "I'm fine, baby. The first several times I tried to willingly bottom, that voice would pop up as soon as things started getting intense. It said I'd get hurt, and that the person I was with just wanted power over me."

Byakuya felt his eyes widen at these words; their reactions might be different, but Renji really did understand about the voice. The younger man seemed to notice, and he asked softly, "Is that what your voice tells you, baby?"

He nodded slowly. "I tried telling it you wouldn't hurt me, but..." he lowered his eyes and breathed, "But then it pointed out the position I was in, and that if you didn't want to stop, it'd be easy for you to take what you wanted."

He heard Renji whisper, "Oh, Byakuya. No wonder you freaked out so badly. I'm sorry, I shouldn't have started that."

Byakuya shook his head, offering his partner a small smile. "I helped you start it. And honestly, I was really enjoying it until I noticed the bed and wondered if... if we were headed there."

The bigger Soul Reaper shook his head. "Not that I know of. I wasn't aiming for that; I was having the time of my life just making out with you, baby, tasting you and hearing the sounds you were making for me while you held onto me so tightly."

Byakuya blushed, even as his heart pounded at the warm, awed way Renji spoke of the little intimacy they'd achieved before his freak-out.

The crimsonette tilted his head, gazing at him. "If I didn't know better, I'd think you like when I talk like that. Your energy does such a fascinating fluttery thing whenever I talk about naughty stuff involving us."

Byakuya felt his blush deepening until it felt as if he had his face in a hot spring, and he couldn't reply. The redhead looked thoughtful for a moment, then murmured, "You know, I really loved those sexy little moans you were making just for me while I was leaving that mark on you."

Byakuya felt his breathing become shaky at his partner's low, seductive tone and suggestive words, and the memory of how good that had felt, and he lifted his fingertips to the spot his lieutenant had been focused on, just above his collarbone. The skin was super-sensitive, and he tried tilting his head to see it.

Suddenly, a grinning Renji had caught his other hand and was tugging him up off the couch. "C'mon, there's a mirror in the bathroom." Byakuya found himself smiling as he allowed Renji to pull him to the bathroom. He stepped in front of the mirror and looked at his reflection.

There, just above his collarbone and a few inches over from his neck, was a dark red mark about the size of a thumbprint. He traced it with a finger, noticing that it was almost painfully sensitive. He realized the Rukon Dog had paused in the doorway, biting a thumbnail and watching him warily. Byakuya asked softly, "Are you ok?"

The younger man shrugged, replying in a cautious tone. "I just realized you might not like it and be mad at me for doing that to you."

Byakuya smiled and shook his head as he returned his eyes to the mirror to admire the mark of passion. "No, I like it. Though, will it stay this sensitive?"

Renji moved to stand behind him, meeting his eyes in the mirror. "Nah, that'll stop soon, couple hours or so. But the hickey itself should last a few days."

Byakuya wrinkled his nose at the funny-sounding name, and Renji chuckled warmly. "You're so adorable. It's also called a lovebite, baby. You like that name better?"

He nodded, and the bigger Soul Reaper stepped closer behind him, strong arms tentatively sliding around his waist. The auburn eyes watched him in the mirror, gauging his reaction. Byakuya leaned against the solid chest, pulling the arms tighter around himself and interlacing their fingers as he smiled at his partner's reflection.

~X~X~X~X~

Renji gave a soul-deep sigh of relief when the noble welcomed his embrace, and he lowered his head to carefully rest his chin on a slender shoulder. He couldn't help staring at their reflection, loving the sight of them together, especially since Byakuya seemed perfectly content to stand here with him, too.

A thought occurred to him, and he whispered, "Did... did you still wanna stay the night?"

The smaller Soul Reaper frowned. "Why wouldn't I?"

Renji felt himself blushing, and tucked his warm face against his partner's neck as he mumbled, "Cause of what happened earlier. I didn't know if you'd still wanna..."

He trailed off as he felt a hand touch his hair and heard the gentle reply. "Oh, I see. It's alright, Renji. And yes, I still want to stay here tonight, with you."

Renji peeked at the mirror to meet his superior's platinum eyes. "I'm really glad you do. And I'll still tell you anything you wanna know 'bout me. I wanna show you my plan for tonight's sleepin' arrangements first. That ok?"

The ravenette nodded, smiling at their reflection. "That sounds good. It's not real late yet; we could get comfortable and talk some more."

Renji grinned and nuzzled under the older man's ear, getting a shy shiver in response. "Hai, Taicho. I like talkin' with ya cause you have a beautiful voice and way of speaking, and everything you think and say is really important to me."

He smiled at the blush on his captain's cheeks as he straightened up and tugged on the pale hands. "C'mon! I hope you like my idea." He took Byakuya to the front room and had him sit on the couch they'd slept on last night, putting his feet up. Then he scooted his other couch to push the furniture together. Face-to-face, the equally sized couches made a sort of nest, the backs and armrests making the walls.

With a grin, he vaulted over the back to sit in the couch-nest, arranging their pillows at one end against the armrests. Byakuya looked surprised, but intrigued by the setup. "Interesting; it's just like a giant nest!"

Renji nodded excitedly. "Exactly! See, my little lovebird, I was thinking that this'll give us more room to move in our sleep, and it'll be great for other stuff, too."

A fine black brow rose as his guest asked in a pretend-suspicious voice, "Oh? And just what 'other stuff' are you planning, Abarai?"

Renji grinned as he sprang out of the nest and retrieved the book Byakuya had been reading earlier. He handed it to the surprised-looking noble. "Here you go. Now, get comfy, like a comfy position you like to read in."

The ravenette obeyed, quickly finding a spot he liked. Reclined against the pillows in one corner with his legs stretched out, his superior looked up at him expectantly.

Renji crawled back into the nest and scooted close to the smaller Soul Reaper's side. "Earlier, you promised I could hold you again."

Byakuya tilted his head. "I did. Do you want to enact that promise now?"

Renji nodded, shifting closer until he could lay his head on his partner's shoulder. He stretched his body out alongside the noble's, gently wrapping his arm around a slender waist. It felt so good, so right, to be snuggled up to his powerful, graceful moon, and he sighed happily.

"Thank you, Byakuya."

~X~X~X~X~

Byakuya was touched by how incredibly happy Renji seemed, just by being able to hold him. He glanced at the book he held before setting it down, opting to run his fingers through the silky red mane parked on his shoulder. A pleased hum rewarded him as the arm around his waist tightened just a little. After a moment, the crimsonette spoke softly. "You could go ahead and read if you want, Taicho. That's a really good one."

Byakuya continued caressing the soft, fiery hair as he replied. "I could, but I find I'd rather pay attention to you. Besides, you said we could talk, and trust me, I can not talk and read at the same time."

The younger man gave a soft laugh. "Me neither. Listening and reading is hard, too. So whattcha wanna talk about?"

Byakuya shrugged innocently. "Oh, lots of things. For starters, how about you tell me if Lieutenant Hisagi is one of your friends that finds me attractive?"

Surprised auburn eyes rose to his, and he smirked. "Honestly, did you think I'd never noticed that flirtatious tone of his? He is very subtle, that man, but not subtle enough. I simply hadn't taken much notice before."

His partner nodded. "Yeah. Shuu likes you, but you ain't gotta worry 'bout him tryin' anything mean. Most Rukon survivors would never force themselves on someone, cause they know just how awful it is. A silver lining, I guess; it's a lot easier to move on with someone who's been through the same thing cause they tend to be really patient and understanding."

Byakuya shifted so he was on his side facing the bigger Soul Reaper, playing with the ends of the long, blood-red hair as he whispered, "So, Shuuhei has been... well, I guess that would be his story. I... I thought for so long that I was alone in what I went through. Not only am I not alone, but apparently, it happens a lot, which is a very sad thing."

The arm around his waist tightened a bit as his host shrugged. "Yeah, but we get through. We just gotta deal with reactions. Shuu actually used to react like you- he'd freeze up when he tried to bottom. And I... when I tried to bottom to him the first time, I punched him right in the face without even meaning to."

Byakuya felt his eyes widen. "Really? What did he do after that?"

The redhead smiled. "Laid down with me and rubbed my hair and back for a long time while telling me it was ok, I hadn't done anything wrong, and that he understood."

Byakuya asked softly, "Like you do for me?"

Renji nodded in agreement. "Yep. Anyways, he likes you, but like a lot of people who don't know the real you, he's kinda scared of you."

Byakuya sighed. "That is never the impression I wanted to give. Not to comrades, anyway. I want respect, not fear. But I am not... I don't... " He sighed again, unable to find the right words.

Renji asked gently, "You don't have enough confidence in your social skills to change how people see you?"
He nodded, and the crimsonette smiled reassuringly. "That's ok, baby. People really only get to see you at work or when you're fighting. Maybe we can find a social situation you'd be comfy in? Tomorrow's Friday, and you know Rangiku will invite you to come out with us. Maybe this time, you don't say no?"

Byakuya murmured, "I'll have to think about it. It has been a long time since I've gone out socially."

His partner nodded in understanding. "Fair enough." The hand on his back began gently rubbing as Renji asked softly, "What else did you wanna talk about?"

Byakuya hesitated, blushing as he wondered the same thing he'd been wondering since sometime yesterday. The younger man tilted his head. "Something embarrassing?" He gave a tiny nod and lowered his eyes.

He wanted to know what kind of lover his lieutenant was, how he would treat him. His experience was limited and tragic, so he didn't really know what it was supposed to be like. If he could get past his fear and get that far, Byakuya wanted to know what to expect from the bigger Soul Reaper. He was also insanely curious.
"I was wondering... how do you... um... what are you...?" He trailed off, completely unsure of how to phrase his question, and horribly insecure about the answer he'd get even if he did manage to get the question out.

After a moment, he heard Renji's voice. "Byakuya?" He lifted his gaze to meet warm honey eyes, and the Rukon Dog spoke carefully. "I might be totally wrong, but is it possible you were trying to ask what I'm like in bed?"

Byakuya knew his face had to rival his companion's hair right now, and he struggled not to lower his eyes as he gave a shaky nod. Renji smiled reassuringly, still rubbing his back. "Thought so; your riatsu was getting all fluttery again. I understand you're embarrassed, baby, and that's ok. I also get why you wanna know this, so just let me know if you actually get uncomfortable, and I'll stop, ok?"

When he nodded, the redhead began speaking in a gentle tone. "Well, first of all, I'm pretty sure I've mostly been giving off a dominant vibe the last couple days, yeah? But you oughtta know, I like being submissive just as much. It has to be with someone I trust, though, or I'll freak out and someone's getting hurt. But I've made a lot of progress since leaving the Rukon, so as long as I really trust the person I'm with, I'm a damn good submissive and I enjoy it."

Byakuya could feel how hard his heart was beating as he asked in a whisper, "Why do you think I need to know that?"

The bigger Soul Reaper smiled charmingly at him. "So you know you always have the option of being dominant. You ever wanna give that a try, you got yourself one ridiculously willing bitch right here. I trust you, and I'd be happy to submit to you, Taicho."

~X~X~X~X~

Renji chuckled softly at the expression of stunned disbelief that his captain now wore. "Oh, baby! You oughtta see your face! Yeah, I've had lots of fantasies about 'us' over the years, and they don't always revolve around me taking you, oh no. A lot of them revolve around the complete reverse."

His superior was blushing deeply, but holding his gaze as he whispered, "I don't know how well I'd do at that."

Renji leaned close to kiss a red cheek. "That's ok. I didn't say we should try right now; just information for the future. And if you do ever wanna try, I'll help you through it."

He felt a slender hand slip into his as Byakuya replied softly, "Ok. I'll hold you to that."

Renji smiled and gently squeezed the hand. "As for what I'm actually like, guess it depends on the mood. See, I'm really good at being gentle and tender. I like being sensual and taking care of my partner when I'm dominant. And I like being treated that way when I'm submissive, too. But sometimes the mood is different and it's more fun to do something else..."

He trailed off, suddenly unsure if he should tell the noble just what kinda stuff he was into when the mood was right. Byakuya was gazing at him curiously, head tilted. "In the shower, you said that I've gotten myself someone who likes 'rough shit'. Is that where you're going with this?"

He nodded slowly, lowering his eyes to their joined hands. Using his thumb, he caressed the back of the older man's hand, speaking quietly. "When I'm in a certain mood, and my partner is, too, I like things I don't really think you'd understand. I'm not sure you'd understand how someone could get pleasure from being treated a certain way, or... or..."

He heard Byakuya's voice, coaxing him to continue. "Or what, Renji?"

Renji took a deep breath. "Or how someone could want to do certain things to someone they care about. I don't just like being treated roughly, I... I like giving that kinda treatment, too."

Once again, he heard his moon's voice, soft and wonderfully accepting. "Alright. So, when this mood strikes, what kind of 'certain things' do you like doing or having done to you?"

Renji glanced up to meet warm steel-violet eyes that were full of curiosity as he whispered, "Being tied up is one. If I know I ain't getting hurt, I like the feeling, and it shows some serious trust to give up control like that. And... basically, anything I like having done to me as a submissive, I like doing as a dominant, and vice-versa."

The Kuchiki heir was watching him with wide silvery eyes, and Renji searched for any sign that he was making his guest uncomfortable. Byakuya seemed surprised by the information he was getting, but otherwise calm, with no judgement or disgust in sight. "So, if you're partner's ok with it, you like to tie them up if you're in the right mood? I think I see; you'd have all the control, and it would show that your partner trusts you completely."

Renji nodded, relieved and pleased by how well the ravenette was taking this. "Plus, if you can't really move or participate, you feel the pleasure more intensely."

His superior nodded in understanding. "Like when you don't feel injuries until you stop fighting? Once you become still is when you feel the pain."

Renji smiled at the analogy. "Exactly, except it feels good."

Byakuya smiled back, blushing lightly. "And yesterday, you said that sometimes, you like having your hair pulled."

He grinned at the reminder. "Yeah, but it sorta has to be done a certain way, cause I don't want it pulled out. Not yanking or jerking. A steady pressure is best, maybe with a little tug."
He shivered at the thought, seeing his partner's surprise as the noble tilted his head.
"And how do you achieve this steady pressure?"

Renji shrugged, gesturing with his hand. "You slide your hand into the hair, close to the scalp, and make a fist. You wanna make sure to get as much hair as possible so the pressure is spread out; it really sucks to only have a tiny section pulled cause that actually hurts. Simply making the fist will work, or you can pull a little. Oh, and when you've got their hair like that, it's easy to direct their head, and if you can direct the head, you can direct the body. A ponytail or braid works, too, cause you got most of their hair right there."

As the words left his mouth, he realized Byakuya's hair was still in its high ponytail, and he felt his cheeks warming. His captain raised his eyebrows. "You, know, Renji, I believe I just read your mind."

~X~X~X~X~

Byakuya watched as his blushing lieutenant grinned at him. "Oh yeah? And what, praytell, was I thinkin'?"

Pretending to contemplate the redhead, he murmured, "You were wondering if I might let you give a demonstration of your hair-pulling prowess."

The bigger Soul Reaper chuckled. "Something like that."

Byakuya smiled as he said quietly, "Ok."

Renji stopped laughing as his auburn eyes widened. "Huh?"

He shrugged, speaking softly. "Well, nothing you said indicates that it actually hurts, and you seem awfully excited about this particular subject. Also, I trust that if I don't like it, you'll stop."

The crimsonette gave an excited nod as he shifted closer. "Of course I would. You really gonna let me do this?" He nodded, and that seductive smile crossed his partner's face. "You're awesome, baby. One thing- don't resist it, cause that'll make it pull harder than I mean to, k?"

Byakuya breathed, "Ok." Then the younger man was kissing him tenderly, and he felt a hand wrap around the base of his ponytail. There was a gentle pressure on his scalp that sent surprising tingles through him, and he allowed the light pull to tilted his head a couple of inches so Renji could deepen the kiss.

Now the light pressure held his head still as their exchange became hotter and more passionate. Byakuya realized this felt good; no wonder his partner had said he liked having his hair pulled! He moaned into the kiss, and felt the grip on his hair tighten a bit as Renji growled in response.

Then the kiss was broken, and Byakuya panted softly as his companion gazed at him, still holding his hair in a firm, but gentle grip. "You're doin' great, Taicho. You wouldn't believe how proud I am of you right now. Can I keep going?" Unsure if nodding would be wise while his hair was captured, Byakuya whimpered and pulled on his companion's yukata, which his hands had somehow become fisted in.

He registered the look in the dark honey eyes- even now, Renji was on the alert for any negative reactions from him, ready to stop if he gave any indication he didn't like this.

He tugged on the yukata again, and felt the fist at the back of his head wrapping itself in his ponytail as the Rukon Dog shifted closer. The gentle pressure increased, coaxing him to tilt his head further, and Byakuya didn't resist it, giving a soft moan as his neck was exposed. Gods, there was just something about this that felt so good, and so naughty at the same time.

Warm kisses were feathered along his throat to the spot below his ear, then the lobe was tenderly nipped. He moaned at the return of that pleasurable sensation, squirming to get closer to his partner. "Ahh, Re-Renjiii."

A low growl washed over his ear, making him shiver. "Gods, baby, my name sounds so fuckin' good on your lips."

Byakuya's head was still secured by one hand, and he felt the other spread over his lower back, pulling him close. He gasped as his own aching body encountered another, and the redhead breathed into his ear, "This is what you do to me, baby. Turn me on till I can't even think straight, and if I knew you'd be ok, I'd bury myself in that perfect ass and make love to you until my name was the only thing you'd remember."

Byakuya whimpered at the sexy words, tentatively grinding against the bigger Soul Reaper. A moan of satisfaction and approval rewarded him. "Yeah, that's it, baby. I thought so; you like dirty talk. That's perfect."

The hand on his lower back slid down to his ass, kneading for a moment before catching his thigh and encouraging him to hook his leg over his partner's lean hips. He obeyed, instantly noticing how the change in position made their bodies press together more firmly. Renji sighed happily against his ear, nuzzling him. "Tell me, baby. Admit you like when I talk dirty to you."

Byakuya moaned at the soft command, shifting his hips to get more friction between them. "I do. I like when you tell me what you wanna do to me. The words you use and the way you say them... please keep talking to me, Renji."

~X~X~X~X~

Renji was in heaven as he held the smaller Soul Reaper close, a slender leg hooked over his hips. Byakuya was so responsive when he wasn't nervous, even seemed eager for his attention. And he liked naughty talk! Renji purred into the delicate shell of his partner's ear, "I could make you scream in pleasure, baby, make you feel so damn amazing, and I'd watch that ecstasy fill your lovely eyes as you cum just for me."

He gave a deep moan as he rocked their bodies together harder. "That perfect ass of yours would tighten on me as you cry out my name. I wouldn't be able to hold back after that, you know. Seeing that pleasure wash over you, and knowing that I was the one to make you feel so good, I'd cum so hard, lose myself deep inside you, every drop just for my brave, beautiful Byakuya."

Still holding the noble's hair with one hand, he slid the other between their bodies as he lifted his head to meet the amethyst eyes darkened with desire. The older man was panting and moaning, obviously enjoying what they were doing. The lithe body jolted when Renji's questing fingers found and captured the impressive cock already slicked with precum.

Byakuya whimpered at him, holding onto the front of his yukata so tightly, it'd surely rip at any moment. "Ren.. ahh, Ren-jiii! Please ahh oh gods, Renjiii!" His partner began urgently thrusting against his hand, his desperate need to cum obvious.

Smoothly, Renji slid the edge of his hakamas down, allowing his own aching, precum-soaked length to spring free. He wrapped his hand around both, pressing their bare, slick cocks together and stroking them as he watched for Byakuya's reaction.
It might've been a bold move to pull with his once-abused moon without asking first, but it paid off beautifully. Deep liquid-steel eyes fluttered almost closed as his superior arched into the attention, whimpering in pleasure. "Ohhhh fuck, Renji."

He growled at the ravenette as he stroked them harder. "Don't you dare close your eyes, baby. I wanna see them when you cum for me." Obediently, the dark eyes fluttered back open to focus on his, and Renji nodded in approval. "Good. From now on, your orgasms belong to me, Byakuya Kuchiki."

He kissed the noble deeply, watching the hazy violet-chrome eyes as he sped up his strokes. The smaller Soul Reaper cried out into the kiss, silvery eyes rolling back as Renji felt a hot eruption between their stomachs. He broke the kiss so Byakuya could breathe, holding the dark eyes as his own release slammed into him. Once again, it was the fact that he'd made his beautiful, powerful captain cum that sent him over the edge, and he moaned as he came, still stroking both of them.

Once he was sure he'd drained every drop from his trembling companion and himself, he reached for the soft, partially damp cloth he'd planted earlier. Renji hadn't assumed anything would happen, but he'd wanted to be prepared, just in case. Quick, gentle, and discreet, he cleaned up his guest, himself, and the couch, all while softly praising his partner on how well he'd done. "So proud of you, baby."

Once they were clean, Renji fixed their hakamas and shifted close to gently embrace his companion. He smiled when Byakuya instantly melted into his arms, relaxing against him as though it came naturally. He tilted his head to nuzzle the slender neck, breathing, "I love you, Byakuya. Thank you for that. Feels like you're relaxin', but I can't see your face, so would you mind saying something so I know you're ok?"

Content, satisfied platinum eyes met his. "I'm good, my sweet Renji. That was... new, but I liked it. Thank you."

Renji smiled at the smaller Soul Reaper snuggled against him. "I like when you call me yours, baby. So everything's good, yeah? I didn't pull your hair too hard or go too far talking dirty?"

Pale cheeks turned pink as the noble shook his head. "No, you... you did wonderfully. As far as dirty talk... Renji, is it strange that I like that when I can't actually do those things yet?"

Renji shook his head, smiling reassuringly. "No, baby, that ain't strange at all. See, talking about naughty stuff can get your mind, and therefore your body, going, but without making you feel like you might be in danger."

Byakuya shyly returned his smile. "In that case, do you want to tell me what else you're 'into'?"

He chuckled as he smoothed stray hairs out of his captain's face. "Alright. The tying up is the one I was most worried about your reaction to. I like other rough stuff, though. Let's see... biting, scratching, spanking, maybe sometimes blindfolding, that about covers the rest of the kinkier stuff I like. I'm seriously looking forward to you scratching my back all to hell one day."

The older man blushed. "Do you often think of rough stuff when you think of us?"

Renji shrugged. "Used to, before I knew what you'd been through. The other stuff ain't quite so bad, but I haven't thought about tying you up since you told me your story."

The ravenette tilted his head, a look of acceptance in his dark violet-steel eyes. "But you had thought about it before?"

Renji nodded, knowing Byakuya would prefer honesty. "Yeah. For example, that scarf of yours has been a big part of a lot of my fantasies, whether it's me tying you up, or you tying me up. It's soft and really long; bet it'd be perfect for some bondage. But once you told me what happened to you... even though you didn't say nothing about him restraining you, it still don't feel right to think about tying you up anymore."

He was surprised when his partner leaned up to kiss his cheek. "You really do worry about me."

Renji nodded. "I do worry about you, Byakuya, all the time. That's what happens when you love someone- you worry 'bout them and want them to be happy."

~X~X~X~X~

Byakuya felt his heart pounding at Renji's words. He knew he couldn't say certain words himself; they seemed to stick in his throat, and refused to be said. But he knew how he did feel, and if he was honest, he'd felt this for quite some time, even before they'd started their still-new relationship.

He whispered, "I... I worry about you. When you leave on missions, I worry about you and get very little work done, and when you come back safe, I am relieved. And I want you to be happy. I... I have always liked seeing you smile, and your riatsu is so vibrant when you are happy."

Byakuya paused guiltily, knowing that those were not quite the words Renji wanted to hear. "I... I imagine it hurts that I don't say it back, but.. I.. I can't.. I'm sorry, Ren-"

Soft lips touched his, cutting off his apology as his partner breathed, "Don't, baby. What you are able to say is more than enough." The strong arms tightened around him, holding him in a world of warmth and safety as the younger man kissed him tenderly.

They parted, and Byakuya gazed at the warm auburn eyes as a hand came up to his head, fingers gently tracing his face. The affectionate action made him feel so warm and tingly, and he sighed contentedly. The crimsonette smiled at him, asking softly, "Did you have anything else you wanted to talk about before going to sleep?"

Byakuya blushed when a final question came up, one he'd been curious about since this afternoon, and he asked shyly, "In the office earlier, what... what were you thinking about that was so distracting?"

The bigger Soul Reaper grinned, a sheepish look on the strong features. "Well, there's a bedtime story. I was fantasizing about us, which I actually do a lot, but today's was more... vivid, cause now I know what you look like and the sounds you make when pleasure consumes you."

Byakuya felt his blush deepening, but he held the dark amber eyes, his curiosity outweighing his shyness. "Would you tell me about it?"

The redhead seemed surprised, but extremely pleased by his interest. "Really? You sure?"

He nodded, and his partner spoke softly. "Ok, baby. Well, it'd be in the future- I've earned every bit of your trust, and we've already gone all the way. We'd be at the office, but not too busy. I totally stalk you, creeping over to your desk without you noticing cause of the paperwork you're focused on. I start whispering in your ear, naughty stuff I want us to do together. Of course, you protest at first, fussing at me about behaving in the office. Mmm, but I am quite persistent, baby, and don't think I'm being cocky, but I'm becoming confident that as long as you're not refusing for a real serious reason, I'd be able to change your mind. A few of those amazing kisses, and some attention here..."

Byakuya felt a finger trace from just behind his earlobe down to his collarbone, and he shivered, already enraptured by his subordinate's fantasy. "Wha-what then?" he whispered, and Renji gave him a sweetly seductive smile, obviously happy that he was being allowed to share.

"I get you all worked up, nice and frisky. I can feel you trembling, baby, but it's ok, I promise I'll take care of you. I undress you slowly, admiring how lovely you are from head to toe, then I remove my own clothes while you watch. I guide you to bend over your desk. Your skin looks so pretty against the dark wood, and you've got your arms over your head to hold onto the front edge of the desk. You're stretched out, that gorgeous ass on display for me... and I bet you still don't have any idea how perfect you are. I don't rush getting to the 'main event', cause I don't wanna end this too fast. So I use my hands and mouth on you, caressing and stroking and kissing and licking you so good, and I can feel you quiver at my attention while I prepare you. Gods, it feels so damn good when you respond to me! Then you beg-"

The younger man abruptly cut off, looking nervous and ashamed. Byakuya realized he was panting softly as he nudged his companion, encouraging him to continue. "I value honesty, Renji. Keep going. I beg you?"

The crimsonette nodded, whispering, "Yeah. You beg me to stop teasing you, and I'd never refuse my moon anything, so I move close and slowly press myself in. It doesn't hurt at all, cause we've been doing it for a while, and I always prepare you real well. I lean over you, sheltering your body with mine as I begin moving. I go slow at first, savoring the sweet little sounds of pleasure you make. Ohh, but then my Taicho starts to get impatient- you push back against me and demand I fuck you like I mean it, and I'd obey you so fast-"

When his partner stopped, Byakuya could've screamed. "What then?"

The Rukon Dog made a face at him. "Then is when I heard 'For the love of the gods, Lieutenant Abarai!'. I snapped out of that fantasy so fast, I almost fell out of my chair."

~X~X~X~X~

Renji saw the mortification that spread over his lovely captain's fine features, and he smirked playfully. "Ahh, relax, Taicho. Like you said, it was distracting since we were in the office."

The noble shook his head, whispering, "But, I wanted to hear more."

Renji chuckled softly. "Well, it's not like that's the only fantasy I've had about us, baby. Plenty more where that came from, and I'll tell you whatever ones you wanna hear some other time. It's sleepytime now."

Without even bothering to check the time, his guest simply nodded in agreement with his decision. Renji climbed out of the couch-nest to turn off the lights. As he came back, he saw his beautiful superior laying in the moonight streaming in through the window, pale skin glowing and silvered eyes watching him expectantly, waiting for him to come to bed.

Renji felt peaceful joy spread through him. Gods, he loved this man so much! He could barely believe that the last couple of days and nights had been real, and that Byakuya Kuchiki was his. He crawled back into the nest, keeping his eyes on his partner as he slipped his yukata off and laid close to the ravenette.

Byakuya spoke softly. "I like when you look at me like that."
He asked, "Like what?"

The noble smiled, whispering, "Like you think I'll disappear if you look away. It makes me feel cherished when you look at me like that, but I'm not going anywhere. I will not disappear on you, my Renji."

He felt his chest tightening. "Promise?" he breathed as his hand found and caught itself a slender friend.

Byakuya continued to smile at him, gently squeezing his hand. "I promise."

Soothed in a way he hadn't realized he needed, Renji leaned close for a sweet, chaste kiss. "Good night, Byakuya. And thank you."

The older man snuggled close. "You're welcome, Renji. Good night."

Renji closed his eyes with a content sigh, starting to drift off as the sound of their breathing deepened in the silence. After a few moments, in that place between awake and asleep, Renji felt Byakuya shift in his arms as though uncomfortable, and he loosened his hold. To his surprise, the dozing heir didn't actually pull away, just rolled in place so his back was firmly against Renji's chest, then began feeling around for his arm.

With a sleepy grin, he slipped his arm around the slender waist, and his guest instantly settled. He shifted to spoon the smaller Soul Reaper, carefully curling up around his warm sakura blossom.

Renji placed a tender kiss on the back of his companion's head, breathing "I love you." He didn't see the small smile on his sleeping captain's face as darkness claimed him.

Something else he didn't see?
The nightmares that struck him in the night.
Renji never saw them coming.

x

Yeah, poor Renji's gonna have nightmares. We're coming back in the morning, when Byakuya wakes up and realizes something's wrong.