A/N: Quite a bit shorter than my last chapter, but this is just a bit of fluffy filler. Enjoy!
Nick finished his pint, intently watching as Jack sipped from a martini, "What kind of mammal goes to a bar to get one of those?"
"You can never go wrong with a martini, Wilde. You're the one who wanted to come here, so you mustn't judge me for drinking," Jack waved his hands, going over the top in his words and the enunciation.
Nick ordered another pint, "And uhhhh," The fox hesitated, "A martini for me and one for my partner too."
"You're too kind," Jack was clearly getting a bit more than buzzed. Nick was starting to feel the same way, although he wouldn't be happy until he couldn't walk. Nick, still struggling with the fact that Finnick of all people could be connected with the scum of scum. They had always stuck to some sort of moral code in the past, albeit a twisted one.
"Nickkkkkkk, you're thinking too much. Just order me another martini," Nick had completely spaced on the fact hat their drinks had arrived. The fox did as he was told, signaling the bartender.
Warily, Nick tasted the mixed beverage. Immediately, Nick downed it like a shot, "Barkeep, another!" Nick practically shouted.
"You're supposed to taaste it, Nicky," Jack whined, and Nick barely acknowledged him, focusing instead on drinking his pint. The two sat in silence for a bit, finishing drinks and ordering more.
"You knew 'bout Judy's promotion, didn't ya?" Nick had really began feeling the drinks now, "You were barely fazed by the revelation, despite ya little bunny theatrics."
Jack scoffed, "Who needs 'em?"
Nick was not exactly sure by what Jack had meant by that, he wasn't even sure if it was a proper response. Instead Nick drank some more from his pint. Then an idea popped into his head, "Oh my God Jack! What if..."
Nick clumsily grabbed the martini glass from Jack's paws, as he hadn't received his new one yet. Despite the small protests, Nick dumped the contents of it into his pint. Jack watched curiously as the colors mixed, and then as the drink was tilted back into the fox's mouth.
Jack wasn't expecting Nick to projectile vomit into the chest of the, now more noticeably bulky, cheetah barkeep. A small growl escaped from his throat, before he calmed himself down, "Settle you bill, and then please leave."
Jack looked to Nick expectantly, and Nick looked to him. Then he did a double take, "I'm supposed to pay?" Jack's face still had a light smile on it, and he nodded, "What's our bill at?"
Jack shrugged, and Nick looked towards the cheetah, who handed him a rather large sheet of paper. Nick skimmed it, arriving at a fairly large circle at the bottom. Nick dropped the bill, grabbed Jack by the wrist, and ran from the bar.
The cheetah yelled after them, but didn't chase them. Nick didn't want to risk it though, and so they drunkenly stumble-ran through the streets and alleys of Zootopia. Luckily, they had left the cruiser at the station so they couldn't be ID'd.
When they had gotten a significant ways away, and through enough twists and turns Nick was sure a cheetah couldn't navigate at high speeds, the two slowed down. Nick couldn't help but laugh through his gasps for air, "We're mammals of the law!" He shouted into the night air, before resting against the brick and sliding to the alleyway's stone floor.
While Jack tried to stop laughing himself, Nick's phone began ringing. Nick pulled it out clumsily, but the alcohol was seriously effecting his coordination. He couldn't even swipe to answer it. As it went to voicemail, Nick tossed the phone to Jack, "Password's: Carrots. Call 'em back, won't ya?"
Jack laughed lightly at the password, and typed it in. Apparently the missed call was from it's namesake, and Jack quickly tapped the call button. It was answered almost immediately, "Nick? Why didn't you pick up? You're usually quick at that," Jack tossed the phone back, and Nick nearly fumbled it.
"Because, Carrots, we're the fox and rabbit Zootopia needs, but doesn't deserve.. We're saving the city from overpriced beer," Clearly his body wasn't liking his jokes, as it shut him up the only way possible. Nick vomited all over the alley ground.
Judy sighed, "Are you drunk, Nick? And who's there with you? I hear laughing," It was true, Jack couldn't help himself. And Nick was definitely drunk.
"Nah, just a little buzzed. Oh! And Jack's with me! Say hi Stripes!" Nick exclaimed, and Jack waved at the phone. It didn't click in either of their minds that Judy couldn't see him wave.
Nick looked through his phone, trying to think of something to do, "Oh! I'm gonna add the Chief to this call, 'kay?"
"Nick I really don't think that's a good idea, it's nearly midnight," Nick pondered this for a second.
"Then why'd you call me?" Silence.
Nick pressed the button, ringing Chief Bogo. Bogo answered after a few rings, obviously not happy at being woken, "Hopps, Wilde, what is this? I was trying to sleep. Do I have to deal with you two even when I'm at home?"
"I'm here toooo," Jack quickly added, trailing off into a small giggle.
"Is that Savage? Jesus I think I can smell the alcohol through my phone. You three are drunk off your asses, aren't you?" Bogo's disdain only deepened.
"Not me Chief," Judy said.
Sighing, a click was heard from Bogo's side, "Well that's two of us. This better be something worthy of my time, Wilde."
"It is, Bungalow. We had a huge request for you, pertaining to our operation," Jack glanced over again at Nick, unaware of what this request was.
Bogo's tone sobered up, "What would that be, Wilde?"
"Can you get those cheapskates to lower the price of a martini and a pint?" Nick and Jack burst out laughing. Bogo grunted, and hung up. Judy giggled a little, before saying goodnight and hanging up herself.
"We should buy a bar, Nick," The fox nodded lazily, "We could lower prices. Overtake the greedy owners who actually want to own a bar seriously."
Nick stood back up, on unsteady legs. Jack mirrored him, but quickly fell over. Nick laughed, and Jack sat up, clearly upset. The rabbit sniffled.
"Jacky, nooooo. Don't cry, or I'll have to hug you," The rabbit perked up a bit at that, and an idea came to him, "What if I carry you? Like on my back or something? Just don't cry, pleeease."
Jack smiled slightly and nodded, head seemingly weighing more than the rest of his body combined. Nick bent down, lifted Jack up, and let the bunny loop his arms around his neck. Staggering slightly, Nick attempted to steady himself. Jack did his best to act as a balancing weight. It didn't help the larger mammal much.
As soon as he got himself properly steadied, Nick set off towards the nearest open street. Nick let Jack direct him, hoping the rabbit would lead them somewhere more entertaining.
Nick instantly regretted opening his eyes. Blinding light assaulted him from every possible direction, and it made his intense migraine even worse. Attempting to get his bearings, Nick slowly adjusted to the light. He was obviously not in his bed, this one was much larger than his. Rolling over, Nick froze.
Sleeping next to him in this strange place was none other than Commander Jack Savage. Who just so happened to be fully naked. Nick scrambled backwards, toppling over the edge of the bed onto the floor.
The full extent of what had happened hit Nick like a sack of bricks when he realized he too, was completely naked. Slowly standing up, Nick glanced around the room. Was this Jack's house? Or some stranger's?
Glancing over at the nude rabbit, Nick's eyes were drawn to the deep, jagged scar marking his side. What it had been from, he could only guess. There were quite a few smaller scars littering Jack's small form, none as prominent as that one.
Nick made a metal note to ask late, but quickly noticed the wide open eyes of his partner, "Enjoying the view, Nicky?"
Looking away, Nick hunted for his clothes. Although after ten minutes he gave up, coming back to rest on the bed, "So...this your place?"
"Nope, no clue who lives here. You should check the closet for clothes, see if any are your size," Nick paused, ready to take that advice. Instead he turned around and looked at the rabbit.
"Jack...did we uhhh. Did we hook up last night?" Nick could see a light blush tint Jack's ears, although he didn't comment on it.
"Honestly, I'm not 100% sure either. The evidence before us can lead us to quite a few conclusions. One being that we did," Nick sighed, and made his way towards the closet, "But I can't remember over half of what happened last night. I remember drinking martinis, then running. That's about it."
Nick laughed, "That's about where my night ended too," Rooting through the closet, Nick quickly found that this was the apartment of a much larger, female mammal, "No luck here."
"Think we should just run for the nearest precinct?" Jack asked, still laying down on full display.
"Well, what's the worst that could happen? If we're caught here then we'll be charged with breaking and entering. If we can make it to a precinct than maybe we can hide in a broom closet for the day," Nick mused, "Although, if we're caught naked in a broom closet together that'd be pretty hard to explain too."
"Welp, I'm willing to try it," Jack said, sighing and sitting up, "Ready to run?"
"Not really...I'm a bit sore," Nick's eyes widened. If they had really done it, had he bottomed?
A/N: Nick's worst fear is a possibility: He bottomed during gay sex. How will our hero cope with this tremendous hit? Aye though, I thank y'all for the support. Although I do appreciate a review or two. (Still having beta troubles, sorry!)