I am not entirely pleased with this chapter, but here it is at last. Thank you, my devoted readers, for your patience. As usual, I own nothing regarding Greek Mythology except for the characters I create! Please review and enjoy!
CHAPTER 12
With a frustrated groan, I throw down the seventeenth scroll I have scoured since arriving in what Hades refers to as his "workroom." The seventeenth scroll on which Karmê's name does not appear. I know I should be relieved thus far because the absence of her name on the scroll means that Karmê is still alive. But the fear that her name might appear in the final scroll that lies before me untouched is stronger than my optimism of leaving here with the knowledge that Karmê still lives.
But delaying the inevitable only makes the occurrence harder to experience. I open the last scroll and begin to peruse the list of names that appear on the parchment. So many names and ages. Men and women, elderly individuals and small children. There are even young girls who either died unmarried or in childbirth. I have always known that no mortal can escape death, but I did not realize until now that the process itself has no barriers to persons regardless of age. Death seems to me such a loathsome state of being that I cannot help but hate it.
My mind is teeming with emotions that run contrary to one another. Naturally, I want to scream with frustration. I want to throw myself on the ground and launch a temper tantrum that would rival that of a six-year-old (in this respect, I am no different from my brother Ares). At the same time, I am experiencing exhaustion and find myself longing for sleep. Twice I catch myself beginning to nod off and only by frequent pinches along my arms am I able to stay awake. It is crucial that I complete my task and learn whether Karmê is here in the Underworld. But the monotony gradually becomes too much and, like the mortal I now am, I finally succumb to sleep's spell.
It is the feeling of someone gently shaking me and softly calling my name that finally awakens me. Had I still been a dignified Olympian goddess, I would be horrified to discover that I have been slouching forward against the stone desk with my head on my arms like a child. But such trivialities matter little to me now. I open my eyes to find Hades standing beside me, his well-chiseled face grave.
"Dawn is approaching," he says quietly. "You had best be on your way back before your mortals wake up and discover your absence."
I nod and look down at the scroll I had been perusing, hoping to conduct a last moment of rapid searching for Karmê's name. I only just manage to reach the end of the scroll when I feel my uncle's hand on my shoulder. It is only then that I turn and allow him to lead me from the room, leaving the Roster of the Dead (and the morbid feelings it inspired!) behind. Yet I feel a spark of hope, for I did not see Karmê's name in the list of deceased mortals. She must be alive! She must be.