CHAPTER 19 – A GOOD NIGHT
They had been supposed to go out on a date tonight.
They had planned this outing over a week ago. Amelia and Arizona had both blocked the night just for the two of them, they had arranged their schedules at the hospital, they had booked a table at their favorite restaurant, they had even chosen a week where Sofia was at Callie's so they wouldn't have to worry with a sitter… In other words, it had been supposed to be the most perfect evening.
Except everything had gone wrong. From the very moment Arizona's foot had touched the cold ground this morning at five AM to get ready for work, she had felt like she had been driving on a highway to hell.
Firstly had come the stomach cramps as soon as she had been out of bed. Since her period hadn't been supposed to be here for another week yet and there hadn't been any sign of blood, she had popped a painkiller in without looking any further into it and had gotten up.
Then had came Terrance, the six years old Wilson and her had been following for a chronic lung infection. He had unexpectedly thrown up all over her while she had been listening to his breathing with her stethoscope. That she could still handle. It had been a little irritating, but he hadn't done it on purpose and he had looked so embarrassed by the whole thing, Arizona hadn't wanted him to feel worst than he already had been so she had downplayed it. She had changed into fresh new scrubs and had gone back to her day.
The only two surgeries she had had today had been supposed to be routine. An appendectomy and a benign tumor excision. Both of them had ended up in a bloodbath, the OR standing still in a mourning silence as she had sorrowfully announced the time of death. The worst part had come right after, announcing to the parents their child's death. That part never got easier. Every time the words "I'm so sorry for your loss," left her mouth, Arizona could feel her heart dropping uncomfortably in her guts. As they had cried for a pain they would never recover from, she had felt like the Reaper Death. Like today, she hadn't been a good enough surgeon. Sage and Julian had been full of life and hopes and dreams waiting to happen and now, they were lying in the cold morgue all alone because of her.
She had paged Amelia in hope to maybe catch a few minutes with her so she could just cry for her losses into her secure embrace. But the brunette had had a busy schedule with little to no time for pee breaks so instead, the pediatric surgeon had found herself sobbing uncontrollably into a supply closet all by herself, her own arms wrapped around her knees.
Eyes still puffy and red, she had decided she needed a second cup of coffee if she wanted to survive the rest of today. Barely had the hot beverage been in her hand, had a rushing doctor passed her by with a shove of the shoulder, making her spill her coffee all over herself. She almost had another crying breakdown right there and then in the middle of the cafeteria. Feeling devastated and hostile, she had contained herself and for the second time today, had changed into fresh blue scrubs.
That had also been then that she had realized that her morning assumptions had been wrong and her period had indeed decided to show up early. And of course, from that tragic moment on, her stomach cramps had ten folded to her greatest discomfort. She had popped a tampon and another painkiller in.
When she had finally gotten home one hour and half before Amelia and her were supposed to actually go out, she still had thought the date was a good idea. She had been feeling exhausted but she had felt like she could use a peaceful and calm moment out with her girlfriend after her hectic day.
But misfortune had had other plans for her apparently. As she had finally been relaxing under warm water, she had lost her footing and she had fell down harshly onto the shower hard tiles, her elbow banging unapologetically into the folded plastic chair she clearly should have been using instead of the handle bar. She had yelped in pain and before she could do anything, big crocodile tears had been pouring out her crystal blue eyes, no stopping sign in view anytime soon.
She had felt so pathetic. Sitting onto her shower cold tiles floor, her elbow painful, her cramps even more painful. The most painful of all though had been the memories of the two little humans dying onto her table earlier today.
That had been at that moment that she had decided that tonight's date wouldn't be happening.
Right now, all she wanted was to eat comfort food, watch a crappy movie she could cry in front of, go to bed early and feel sorry for herself.
Amelia came home forty minutes before they were supposed to go out, a wide smile spread on her lips. She was finally out of the hospital and the prospect of passing some down time with her partner left her all giddy.
"Hello," she said far too cheerfully as she dumped her keys into the bowl provided.
Amelia's smile fell short when she saw the blonde's figure though. Arizona was lying onto their couch in fetal position, sobbing profusely and used tissues were littering the living room. Her heart dropped in worry. She had no idea what was going on but it clearly was something big to make Arizona this upset.
"Or not," Amelia muttered to herself.
The neurosurgeon quickly discarded her coat and shoes to come and kneel in front of the couch. Her hand grabbed the other woman's and gave it a gentle squeeze. "What's going on?" she asked sweetly, secretly hoping her fear wasn't too evident in her tone.
"I'm-I'm so sorry," Arizona blew out her nose and let out another sob before carrying on. "I kno-know we-we were su-supposed to go out to-tonight but I had a ver-very shitty day. Like shittily sh-shitty."
"What happened?"
Amelia's voice was so calm and caring. It felt like a safe boat into Arizona's current emotional whirlwind and it grounded her. She had a safe ship named Amelia she could hop on and hold onto like her life depended on it.
Quite a few people who had known Amelia younger had told Arizona that the brunette was a hurricane. Derek had even once told her he was happy to see his little sister with someone who could be calm and reasonable when Amelia was being destructive. Arizona had simply scoffed at him this day. She loved Derek, he was a cherished friend but he cruelly lacked some clairvoyance. Yes, she was here when Amelia was going through rough times and nightmare-like memories, but the brunette did and was doing the exact same thing for her. They were both damaged goods and in dear need of a stable partner when their mental stabilities went flying through the windows.
So, when her girlfriend was serenely looking at her with so much tenderness, Arizona knew it was going to be alright. The words flew out of her mouth into a long monologue before she could stop herself: the puke, the kids, her elbow, the coffee… Everything was getting spilled out and Amelia listened carefully, taking in what the blonde was telling her as if nothing else in the world mattered right now but the misery Arizona was feeling. As she talked, her sobs subsided and her mind became lighter, her inner tension relaxing.
"I don't want to go outside ever again. And I feel guilty because we had this date planned for a while now and everything was going to be perfect. You were really looking forward to it and I'm ruining it because I'm a big mess."
"Do you know why I was looking forward so much to it?" the neurosurgeon asked.
"That sinful cheesecake we always share for dessert when we go there?"
Amelia chuckled. "While it is to die for, it isn't the actual reason," she explained. "I wanted to enjoy some quiet time with you. Just the two of us without any interruption for a few hours, staring at your perfect face and do the crappiest jokes so you'd laugh," Amelia paused, her eyes sinking into Arizona's and she squeezed her hand.
She wished the pediatric surgeon knew how raw and truthful she was feeling. The shine filling her bright blue eyes told her she did. They both leaned forward to meet into a powerful yet comforting kiss.
"Mmh, snotty kiss," the brunette teased her as she pulled away.
"Shut up!" Arizona giggled and Amelia's heart fluttered in her chest.
There was the sound she had been longing to hear for the past ten minutes.
"You know what, fuck restaurants! We don't need a restaurant to do all of that," Amelia said. "We have Thai food on speed-dial and a perfectly oversized ice cream pint in the freezer," the brunette's hand came to rest on the blonde's temple and her thumb caressed her delicate features. "We also have Brokeback Mountain on DVD. Your favorite, right?" she asked with a little smile.
The blonde nodded, her bad mood fading away with each passing minute under Amelia's care.
"I'm going to grab you a hot water bottle for your belly and some painkillers. Oh, and I better gather some blankets too so we can snuggle into a warm cocoon."
"Are you sure you don't mind?" Arizona asked, still feeling a little guilty.
"Who cares about some stupid plans when I have the perfect excuse to stay at home and hold my girlfriend in my arms all night long? Can't do that at a restaurant for sure," Amelia winked at her playfully. "I mean, technically I could but it would be awkward and I'm not sure about the amount of food effectively ending up in my mouth rather than in your hair or on your clothes. And I'm kinda concerned about the other customers too."
Arizona giggled again and softly hit her on the shoulder. "Dork. Go grab the stuff while I order the food."
Amelia kissed her forehead and made the famous military sign, "Colonel, yes colonel!"
Their evening was absolutely perfect. The food Arizona had ordered would probably left them feeling full for three days, the movie was playing onto their TV screen and they made comments and complained about everything wrong with it. Arizona got plenty of cuddles and then some. While the painkiller did poorly to relieve her from her cramps, at least her elbow wasn't aching anymore at each movement.
That was when Amelia noticed just how Arizona was comfortable. And not comfortable as in feeling at ease and relaxed but as in her bed was comfortable. Amelia thought Arizona may be the most comfortable person she had ever laid on. They were approximately the same height so it wasn't awkward and their bodies met curves for curves. The crook of her neck was the exact right size to inhabit Amelia's head and in case she wiggled down, soft pillow boobies were waiting for her.
Amelia also liked that her girlfriend's belly wasn't as muscular as hers. The soft flesh and barely there fat made it that much easier to just melt into her embrace. Her arms were the perfect size to grab her girlfriend's butt. And her leg/thigh felt nice too. Always warm against her cold feet and while the blonde often complained about them, she never actually removed her leg, instead letting Amelia do her thing.
Don't get her wrong, other people happened to be comfy too. But not nearly as much as Arizona. Like Addison for example. The redhead was too tall and while her breasts were definitely present, Arizona's were much more fuller, hence comfier.
Tonight however, she could feel the abdomen muscles quivering ever so slightly against her and spotted the small grimaces flashing on Arizona's angelic features from time to time. Just like that, she knew the pain medication the blonde had swallowed earlier hadn't relieved her completely. She also knew Arizona's tendency to hide her pain away, which she found incredibly annoying but Amelia understood well that it wasn't easy for her partner to show her vulnerability, since it was something she still struggled with herself.
She knew how painful her cramps could be at that time of the month, so her hand traveled under Arizona's tee-shirt to land on the side of her belly, stroking the baby soft skin under the fingertips in hope to calm her tensed muscles. A pair of lips dropped a sleepy kiss onto her forehead in thankfulness.
After a few moments, the neurosurgeon could tell her motions weren't effective so her hand wandered lower under the blonde's sweatpants as her lips strolled onto the blonde's neck. They wrapped themselves around her pulse point, nibbling and immediately soothing the bite with her tongue. Arizona whimpered quietly and tilted her head away to give more space for Amelia to work with. New flesh exposed, Amelia meticulously peppered it, careful to not let any inch undiscovered and unloved.
Arriving to Arizona's ear, she pushed the blonde's silky hair to get a better access and latched onto the sensitive spot. Under her, she could feel the belly muscles tensing for an entirely different reason, the pain finally taking the back seat to let want take the wheel. As she found a particularly sensitive spot, Arizona's hand cupped the back of her head to keep her there.
The brunette smoothly slid a thigh in between the other woman's to give her something to grind against. The sudden movement seemed to sober the blonde up though. Amelia's hips rolls were stopped short by Arizona as she wiggled herself up onto the couch, putting some distance in between them. Amelia raised her eyebrows, confused and intrigued at the sudden stop.
"Did I do something wrong?" Amelia asked, her somber blue eyes seeking bright ones.
"No, of course not," the pediatric surgeon reassured and then asked apprehensively, "But… what is it exactly that you're doing?"
"I thought it was pretty obvious."
Arizona could feel the heat embarrassingly tainting her cheeks with a bright red blush against her will. "Makin' out?" she said tentatively.
Amelia laughed lightly. "I was more thinking about making love. Unless you don't want to of course, I'm fine with making out too."
Her pupils dilated ever so slightly at her partner's admission. "I want to. Trust me, I truly do. It's just, I'm not exactly disposed? You know, bleeding and all that. Are you sure you want to?"
Arizona's thoughtfulness made Amelia's heart melt in her chest. She understood where the blonde was coming from. She still felt like a baby bisexual in many ways, but right now her concern was totally unnecessary. Her hand tenderly cupped Arizona's cheek and her thumb stroked the skin back and forth.
"Babe, it's alright. I like you. Period or no period, you're still awesome in my eyes and I still crave you the same. And a little blood isn't going to put me off. Trust me, I'm a surgeon," she added playfully with a wink.
"I- I don't want you to feel like you have to. I get that period sex isn't for everyone. I personally don't mind it and being a lesbian, I'm familiar with it. And it's okay if you're not comfortable with it. I don't expect anything from you."
"I know I don't have to. I want to. You had the crappiest day ever and you deserve some good. I want to do everything I can do to help you relax. Your womb is aching and the painkiller didn't help, I can tell. You're hurting and I hate seeing you in pain like this. Now, climaxes can help with that. I masturbate all the time when my cramps get very bad," she shrugged nonchalantly. "Will you let me help please?"
Arizona was at loss of words for a few seconds. Amelia's care made the line between liking and loving a little more blurry and what had started as small butterflies into the pit of her stomach now felt like giant flying bugs spreading warmly all over her body.
"You're the best girlfriend I could ever ask for," she said, her voice cracking and Amelia couldn't help but find it utterly adorable.
"Is that a yes?"
Arizona nodded. "Please."
"Wait! One question: pad or tampon? 'Cause I'm pretty sure pads aren't really the best for what I-"
Arizona stopped her before Amelia could spiral into a ramble by pecking her. "Tampon. Now stop worrying so much, I'll tell you if anything feels weird, 'kay?"
Amelia pulled the woman back down under her and her leg glided right back where it had been a few moments earlier. Arizona's eyes fluttered closed as she let her hips move freely, no longer worrying about crossing a line they weren't ready for. The sight of Arizona succumbing to her inner desire only spurred Amelia on.
The neurosurgeon's lips strolled down her neckline only to be stopped by her sleeping tee shirt. She teased her collarbones and her left hand made its way under the top, her grazing fingertips making the skin came alive with shivers under its passage and eventually settled onto a bare breast. She teased the flesh until she felt the nipple hardening against her palm. She sat up and helped Arizona do the same to quickly discard the piece of clothing. Barely had it touched the floor, the neurosurgeon's mouth sealed around one of the other woman's inviting rosy bud.
Arizona gasped and her hips shifted to seek more contact so Amelia swiftly lay them back down. She moved her leg softly to help Arizona along, putting more pressure where she needed her the most while her mouth devoured every inch of skin that the blonde was offering her. Soon enough, hasty breath evolved into full moans and the pediatric surgeon's touch became less precise, blindly responding to the want growing in her lower belly without any question.
Arizona grabbed Amelia's ass with a full hand to pull her impossibly closer to her, as if she couldn't get enough of her. Sensing her lover was close, the brunette contracted her thigh muscles to bring her over the edge. Arizona came with a guttural groan and the neurosurgeon could see the ecstasy running through her lover's body. Her eyes fluttered shut, her back arched up, her hands squeezed harshly, goose bumps ran all over her body… Arizona looked breathtaking like this. Well, she always looked breathtaking but even more so in coital bliss. Amelia gradually slowed down her grinding movements and let the blonde come back to her senses.
Finally she came to a still and Arizona snaked her arms around her lower midsection, hugging her loose.
"You alright?" she asked to the blonde.
Arizona poked one eye open to look at her. "Perfect."
"Good, that was what I was aiming for," Amelia joked and kissed her.
Her mouth then traveled onto her jaw, kissing her way up until she found a blonde's ear. Her hand finally passed the last barrier disconnecting them and drifted into her panties. Her fingers were almost immediately welcomed by an unusually big amount of wetness and she couldn't help the moan that escaped her throat. There was something utterly pleasing about knowing she was the reason behind this mess.
"Someone is turned on," she teased into the shell of her ear, knowing it was a sensitive place and hence increased Arizona's craving.
"My breasts get ridiculously over-sensitive when I'm on my period and you're being a tease," Arizona confessed, visibly embarrassed.
"No need to be shy about it, honey. I like the way your body respond to mine," the brunette mumbled as her lips headed once more towards her chest, wanting to make the most out of Arizona's declaration.
Coated with arousal, her fingers expertly worked her partner's already engorged clit until Arizona came screaming not once but twice. Her pace eventually slowed down and left the over-sensitive bundle of nerve when Arizona moaned uncomfortably. The pediatric surgeon sent her a satisfied smile as her breathing slowly came back to normal.
Amelia softly peppered the blonde's tensed belly with thousand of kisses to calm the cramping muscles. It had started sweet and tender however, Arizona could now see the other woman travelling more and more south with each kiss, her eyes filled with desire. She quickly clamped her thighs together and Amelia looked at her questioningly.
"Uh-uh," the blonde shook her head. "I can't take another one."
Amelia smiled kindly at her. "'Kay," she dropped one last kiss onto her stomach.
Still longing for her lover's taste though, she brought her wet fingers to her mouth and licked them clean as she sat up. She grabbed Arizona's tee-shirt and handed it to her.
"I'mma get you some new panties. Those ones are ruined."
The pediatric surgeon propped herself onto her elbows and looked at her with an eyebrow raised, confused. "What about you?"
"What about me?" Amelia asked, obviously confused too.
"Don't I get to help you relax too?"
The brunette finally understood what Arizona was talking about. "I'm good as it is," she chuckled and squeezed her thigh reassuringly at the doubtful look adorning Arizona's features. "I promise. Tonight's about making you feel good."
"You certainly did."
"Then my girlfriend mission of the day is accomplished."
Arizona raised both eyebrows in surprise. "Your girlfriend mission?"
"Yep!" the neurosurgeon replied proudly yet childishly. "Cause you're my girlfriend now, so every day I have to make sure that you're laughing and that you're feeling happy. Like a romantic agent 007."
Arizona's cheeks almost hurt from the big smile that unconsciously appeared on her lips. Amelia never stopped to surprise her with random adoring declarations. What did she ever do to deserve someone this caring and thoughtful?
She sat up and lovingly cupped Amelia's face with both hands. "My very own romantic and dorky agent 007. I like the sound of that," she kissed her languorously, her tongue gliding into Amelia's eager mouth and tangled with the other woman's.
The brunette's arms wrapped around her frame protectively. She pulled away, out of breath. "I'm going to get you some new underwear now and then we can finish watching the movie."
"Thank you. The period ones-"
"-are in the second drawer on the left," Amelia finished for her. "I know baby."
She took the old undergarments and threw it into the hamper and washed her hands before coming back with a new pair. She helped Arizona into them along her gym short. They cuddled back onto the couch and Amelia grabbed the blanket so they wouldn't get cold.
"They seriously expect me to believe they both pass every summer fucking into that mountain without any lube? Yeah, right," Amelia sneered.
Arizona giggled. "Shut up and just appreciate the movie."
"Fine," she huffed, "Just saying."
As the minutes passed by, Amelia could see the blonde's eyes dropping and a few yawns escaped her. At the end of the movie, Arizona couldn't help but cry. This movie never failed to make her cry unfortunately, it was simply too beautiful not to. Amelia just held her tighter and kissed her forehead.
"Come on, babe. I saw you nodding off a couple of times," she said as she turned the TV off. "We better go to bed."
"That would be nice," Arizona replied tiredly.
Suddenly the pediatric surgeon was scooped up into Amelia's arms and they were heading to her bedroom.
"I could have walked," Arizona said none accusingly.
"Maybe I just wanted to grasp a feeling," Amelia joked and squeezed her ass playfully.
The brunette gently let her down onto the bed and changed for the night.
"Gotta use the bathroom, be right back," Arizona informed and slipped away into the bathroom.
When she came back out, their bedroom was dimly lit and Amelia was already waiting for her under the sheets, a hot water bottle waiting on her pillow.
Arizona silently took her pajamas off, she wanted to feel Amelia's skin against hers tonight, it was comforting. She got under the duvet and hugged the warm bottle against her belly and let out a small sigh of relief. Amelia opened an arm to invite her closer and the pediatric surgeon gladly complied. She laid her head into Amelia's neck and tangled her leg with her partner's ones. Amelia was holding her book into one hand while her other was tenderly tracing unidentified figures onto Arizona's lower back.
"I had an amazing date tonight. Thank you, it was exactly what I needed."
Amelia squeezed her closer to reassure her. "Me too. I think that how I want to spend all our dates now. You, me, a blanket and just… being us."
"I like being us too."
"How's the uterus?"
"Still shredding itself apart but pain's more bearable. Thanks."
"Elbow?"
The pediatric surgeon bent it and stretched it out a couple of times. "Good as new," she commented at the lack of any soreness.
As Amelia started a new chapter, she could see Arizona's eyes dropping more and more but refusing to stay closed for too long.
"You can fall asleep, I won't hold it against you."
"But you feel good, I want to enjoy it for as long as I can."
Amelia chuckled before kissing the top of the other woman's head. "Go to sleep babe. I'll still be here when you wake up."
"You better," Arizona yawned and a few moments later, her deep and relaxed breaths filled the room.