A/N: It's 11:13 pm, yessss, I did it! xD
Some explanation before you read but you'll be able to find this info at the end of the chapter, too.
KGB - It was the main security agency for the Soviet Union.
(*) - Archangel Oblast is an existing region in Russia. The detail that Tala and Boris were born in Severodvinsk is not my idea, they officially met with Volkov there according to the manga.
(**) - Baba Yaga is an ogress who steals and eats children in the Slavic folklore. (Yes, I know what you think. ಠ_ಠ )
Chapter 21 – Part II
"I was your trial, Boris. I was the 'boy' you had to kill." Alexa told him in a calm, broken voice. The leaking tears blended with Boris' blood on her face.
"What?" Sergei was bewildered, not sure if he was hearing well what she had said.
Tala felt that he froze right then and there. He also wanted to deny what he had just heard, but the way Alexandra looked at Boris with deep agony couldn't mean anything good.
"No." Boris managed to whisper at last, looking horrified. Stepping back, he started hyperventilating. "No, no, no, no, no. No! No!"
His volume raised with each word, unintentionally backing to the opposite wall that eventually blocked his way, not able to run any further.
"That was a boy! That was a boy! And he died! HE DIED! You're lying! You're lying, he died! I killed him! YOU FUCKING BITCH! WHY DO YOU DO THIS TO ME?!" He shouted from the distance, pointing accusingly at the blonde girl.
"I'm so sorry!" Alexa cried, breaking down that made Tala finally move into action.
"Sergei! Take Alexa somewhere else!" He ordered, he didn't want another fight between the two.
Not receiving response from his muscled friend, Tala turned expectantly to Sergei who stared in shock at the madden Boris and crying Alexandra, seemingly glued to the spot where he stood.
"SERGEI!" Tala yelled at him. He needed his help if he wanted to secure the situation! Boris was obviously losing it again, and he was determined to protect his teammates this time.
The big guy snapped out of his stupor and looked at the captain in anticipation.
"Take Alexa to her room!"
Sergei didn't need more, he immediately stepped to Alexa and grabbing by her arm, he gently led her out of the room. She didn't resist. The door closed after them, leaving Tala alone with Boris.
Now, that he didn't have to worry about Alexa's safety, Tala turned his attention to his crazily pacing friend. Boris was uttering the same words through his gritted teeth, silently crying in denial as he held his own head like he was trying to get rid of the poignant memory.
Tala still couldn't make any sense of the whole situation. He didn't understand what might have happened with Boris and Alexandra, or what past they had shared, but Tala felt the similar anxiety what he could see on Boris, creating a lump in his throat.
"Boris, calm down." Tala said, approaching cautiously before the crazy boy who didn't respond to his words at first.
When Tala carefully touched his shoulder, he expected an aggressive reaction from him, but Boris surprisingly stopped pacing and looked at his captain with his blood-soaked face.
"Sit down! Tell me what happened."
Despite holding its usual commanding tone, his tender words and gestures worked like a charm as he led Boris to the couch. The troubled boy sat down, he tried to calm down. Breathing shakily as he was gulping the air to numb his disturbed mind with oxygen.
"Boris." Tala urged him quietly as he occupied the armchair in front of his friend. "I think you should tell me what happened with you."
Boris leant back, looking up at the ceiling. His white shirt became red in a trail under his chin, his trousers were spotted with blood patches from his hand.
"Okay, I'll tell you." Boris said, his voice sincere and clear for the first time after an awfully long time. "But I need to smoke for that."
He didn't ask for his captain's approval, he got up from the couch and walked into the bedroom he shared with Sergei. Tala abominated any noxious habit, he scorned his teammates (mostly Boris) when he caught them smoking or drinking alcohol between beybattles, however, he knew that Boris was hiding items in his room.
The cigarette might have been stored away carefully because Boris was rummaging up his stuff for a long time. When he finally found it, he returned to the common room and sat back to the same spot, tucking immediately the first pile between his lips, lighting it with a match.
Tala made an exception for him this time and didn't forfeit the cigarette from him. He wanted Boris to talk, and if he could do it only with smoking, so be it.
"You didn't understand for a long time why Volkov separated us in the Abbey. You thought we were trained the same way, just in different groups." Boris began, blowing out the first puff of smoke in the room.
He seemed different somehow. With hands resting on his legs, holding the cigarette between his index finger and thumb, prisoning the smoke in his palm, he looked tired like an old warrior who had seen too much violence in his life.
Tala was leaning forward in his eagerness to hear his story, sharpening his senses to catch every word and small, speaking body motions from Boris.
Oddly, in this state, the way he was sitting, it reminded Tala more of his friend from the street than ever. Boris' voice was raw and confident, acting maturely as an adult he was. In the past years, Tala had often forgotten that Boris was actually older than him, putting himself involuntarily into a role that he was responsible for his big friend as a captain. He didn't understand either, but he now felt relieved for some reason.
This was his adamant, strong friend who had run away from home because he hadn't tolerated the brutal beatings from his parents anymore, and who had forged an alliance with him in order to survive the harsh winters. Boris was again the ruthless boy who didn't let anyone to mess with him or with his redhead friend.
"Well, there was a reason that we were in different groups. Volkov wanted you to become the face of BioVolt, to represent the Russian Beyblade team before the public. For me… I was destined with a different fate." Boris took a pull on his cigarette, exhaling slowly as he stared at the floor, tough Tala could swear that he was seeing something else before his eyes. Something related to the Abbey.
"They wanted to train the perfect KGB-agents." Boris blurted out eventually, getting over it as quickly as he could.
Tala knitted his eyebrows in a frown, gaping at such nonsense.
"Wha… KGB-agents? …What do you mean?" He stammered, sensing a knot was forming in his stomach.
"I don't know much about Volkov's plans, but he had many irons in the fire back then. He trained children to win the Beyblade Championship; had a plan to dominate the world with the bitbeasts; and he secretly trained parentless children to serve the country with the sharpest combat skills." Boris let the information sank in Tala's mind, then he suddenly started chuckling. His laugh was empty. "I am the Lethal Archangel."
Tala furrowed his eyebrows, wondering if he should worry for Boris' mental health.
"I don't see the connection." He pointed out to the incoherency of his speech.
"I know. It doesn't make any sense for you right now." Boris rubbed his eyes, wincing in pain when he accidentally pressed his broken nose as he thought over his following words.
"Volkov's dream was to raise the most loyal KGB-agents for Russia and for himself. He wanted to give back Russia's glory after the Soviet Empire fell apart. He kept grumbling about that all the time when he visited our trainings.
'Russia must stay united!' 'We, Russians shall be the leaders of the world!' 'Democracy's weakening our Motherland! You must give back the glory Russia lost in the sea of the poisoning liberal thoughts! If anyone disagree with this, they are your enemy and must be eliminated!'" Boris finished mimicking Volkov's rough, angry voice. "I didn't fucking understand the half of his speeches back then."
Tala furrowed his eyebrows so hard, his head started to ache, holding on to the armrest of the armchair because his world had just turned upside down. He was barely able to form a rational thought. His mind couldn't process such incoherence as training children to be KGB-agents. That was too… fucked up.
Although Vladimir had liked voicing these thoughts to Tala's group, as well. It had been no secret that Volkov had been grieving over the Soviet Union's dissolution, and admitting half-heartedly, this was the bond Tala had shared with the cruel man.
Tala's family had lost everything with the dissolution; his father had been dismissed from the army, had lost his prestige as a soldier, and they had become poor. That was then his father had turned his suppressed aggression and frustration against his family, beating Tala and his mother brutally almost every day.
Not hearing anything else in his life, Tala also felt anger for the end of the Soviet Union and put every blame on that.
If the Soviet Union hadn't been disintengrated, his father wouldn't have lost his job, wouldn't have spent his days at home, beating his family. His mother wouldn't have left them behind, Tala wouldn't have been so desperate to run away from the terror of being killed by his own father, and he wouldn't have sat in an armchair now, listening a boy he had known from the streets.
Swallowing hard, Tala bit back the unwillingly summoned rage inside him, and kept listening to Boris' story.
"Our main purpose was to learn combat kills, spying and chemistry to create poison. We had beyblade training, too," Boris continued, his voice and breathing was calm now, almost remote. "But our main purpose was how to use it as a weapon. How to kill with it. You see, a beyblade is still just a kid toy for most people and easy to enter with it anywhere, but actually, it can cause serious damage."
Yes, Tala knew that. Sometimes he wondered how the championship organizers let them beyblade regarding how many times they damaged the stadium. Tyson had already destroyed two with Kai's and Brooklyn's help, and even that couldn't stop Mr. Dickenson to build another one and announce the next Beyblade World Championship. Each year, the competition became wilder as the beybladers explored their new powers.
If a beyblade could do such a harm on a complete building, Tala didn't want to imagine how a man would look like after a beyblade attack.
"I-I can't believe it…" Tala managed to say, again, too many questions swirling in his mind though he couldn't catch any of them. Like a wet, oily fish, they slipped away. "This is madness."
They had grown up in the same building, living with the same people between the same walls, eating the same food, yet their childhoods were totally different.
"How could they keep it as a secret for so long? How is that I've never heard about this?"
Boris rolled his head at him with a pitying expression.
"Volkov was good at keeping secrets, you know that. Moreover, it was highly confidential."
"'Highly confidential!'" Tala spat frustratedly. Recently, he heard this word way too many times.
"I don't think anyone knew about it outside of the Abbey, and Volkov quickly made it clear for us what happens with the one who talks."
"I have ideas." Tala remembered the horror when Volkov had haphazardly picked boys out of their group and punished them with a whip.
For some reason, Tala had been punished like that only once – when he had lost the battle against Tyson.
"He had a perverted game, hiding a 'spy' among us." Boris told an example anyway. "We had to find out the identity of the spy in a specific time frame. If we successfully figured it out, we had to beat the spy as a group for his failure. If we couldn't find out who was it, they practiced enhanced interrogation techniques on us to get used to the fear of dying in case we get caught by the authorities."
"What is an enhanced–"
"Torture." Boris cut in, rushing with the conversation. The cigarette trembled in his hand as he repeatedly lifted it to his lips to inhale the nicotine.
Tala's mouth became dry. Numerous images with Boris crying out in agony flashed before his eyes, feeling stupefied by them.
"How did they…"
How did they torture you? Tala wanted to ask, but didn't dare. He was not sure he wanted to know at all.
Still, he needed to know!
He ached for more terrifying details that could fire up his desperate, grieving heart, chasing away the panic from his mind with the wrath that gave him strength to keep listening.
"Don't wanna know every detail, Yuriy. It's better if you don't." Boris warned him softly, but Tala couldn't agree with him.
He needed his anger!
"Did they often torture you?"
"No. After the first failure I didn't let the others to make the same mistakes again. I almost always found out who was the spy in the end. I was the best candidate in the group." Boris smirked at him smugly, but his eyes gleamed with self-hate.
Now, Tala understood the reference of 'Lethal Archangel'. Boris must be truly deadly thanks to his training, and both he and Tala had been born in Severodvinsk, the second largest city of the Russian subject, Archangel Oblast(*).
Dripping sound hit suddenly Tala's ears in the great silence and he looked at Boris' hand. Blood was dropping on the carpet, contaminating it.
Tala shot up to break the suffocating silence and tension between them. He needed a small break. He needed a brief time to re-organize the overwhelming thoughts in his disturbed minds and the aching feelings in his painfully pulsing heart as he sought for the first-aid.
Bringing it out of his room, he pulled the armchair closer to the couch, sitting on its edge to lean closer to the pale boy. First, he gave a clothe to Boris for his bleeding nose then examined the deepness of the cut on his hand.
"So, how did they break your spirit?" Tala continued the inquiry with the attempt to distract his restless soul.
Boris shot a glare at him, offended by the question as if he was denying his words.
"There must have been something that made you follow their orders, otherwise you'd have set on fire the whole building. Or you'd have run away just like from your home. I know you this much." Tala explained, carefully pouring antiseptic on the falcon's hand.
Boris sniffed and watched as the captain irrigated his wound.
"I did try to run away if you remember."
Tala bit his lip and avoided Boris' eyes, focusing on bandaging the wound.
Reviving the only time when Boris had managed to sneak out from his dormitory, he had found Tala and practically pleaded to run away with him from the Abbey, back to the streets. But Tala remembered vividly the cold hands of the Russian winters and the hunger that had driven him crazy, so he had refused to go with him.
He had had a better life in the Abbey than on the streets. Tala had been also beaten and mistreated on numerous occasions for petty reasons, but it had been nothing new for him. He had also been beaten by his father many, many times at home. He had gotten used to it.
In the Abbey, he had been popular, he had slept in a bed, he had eaten three times a day. In contrast to Boris, Tala had had a bright future as a beyblader in the Abbey.
Therefore, he had turned down his friend and gone back to his comfortable bed on that night. Boris had refused to leave without him, so in the end, he had stayed, too.
"Don't put this all on me." Tala's tone held a silent warning, defending himself against the guiltiness that ate his inside. "There must have been something that kept you in the Abbey and helped you survive the days. Everyone had something."
"Yes. For me, it was you, what else?"
Tala stopped and jerked his head up at the plain reply.
"Volkov knew you were the only friend in my life, so every time when he wanted something from me, he just had to mention your name and I did everything he wished for. Like a goddamn faggot." He said accusingly like it had been Tala's fault that he had such strong feelings for his friend.
Then with a sigh, Boris continued without the sharpness in his voice.
"I was also constantly threatened with my own life. I had to obey, otherwise I would have been killed either by the hands of the guards or my own group as a part of their training."
Not able to hide the compassion in his eyes anymore, Tala turned back to the wound while he kept listening. He didn't know how long he was going to endure it without angry tears. His heart was clenching already so hard in his chest that he felt almost sick.
But he must stay strong, remain calm. For their friendship. He owed Boris that much. At least, now he understood the existence of the walls between them.
"One time," Boris continued, stubbing his cigarette to the leg of a table beside him. "When I refused fulfilling his command, he threatened he cut your throat right before me."
"So, what did you do?" Tala was sure Volkov had been bluffing then. He would have never killed him. He had been his favourite… Right?
"What did I do?" Boris repeated with incredulousness. "You're alive, no?"
He scolded him with a cutting glance. The last time he had talked with Tala liked that, it had happened way before the Abbey, when Tala had been only a lost, desperate child and hadn't been Boris' superior as a captain.
The fact that Volkov had said such thing didn't surprise Tala at the slightest. That man's had a fetish threatening people.
He was rather surprised by the fondness Boris felt for him. All along, while he had been busy to become the best beyblader on the world to make proud his country, Boris had fought for them both.
"What was the command?" Tala asked, because he knew Boris mentioned this memory for a reason.
Boris sighed again and closed his eyes.
"Every year, we had a big exam, a trial on which we had to show the skills we had learnt so far. We had to do awful things to prove our value for Volkov. On one of these exams, I had to kill a younger boy. I denied the command at first, I couldn't do it."
Hearing that, Tala breathed out the air he didn't realize he was holding in for quite some time. It was relieving to know that Boris had been trying. He had been fighting back at least. This thought gave him hope.
"Volkov didn't like that. He told me that either I kill that boy right then and there, or he kills you. I had to decide which of you died that day. I chose you."
They were sitting in a luxurious hotel room, in the middle of a desert, but the air was frozen around them just like it had been always in the Abbey. The real world, the present seemed distant to him; they were in the black pit of their shameful memories. Maintaining his sanity had never been this hard as Tala slowly started to put the pieces together.
"The boy who was actually Alexandra?" He whispered, terrified.
Boris shook his head silently, eyes brimming with tears.
"I don't know. I don't know. It's…" Boris trailed off in a wavery voice, unable to find the proper definition for his misery. "We should have fled from that madhouse when we had a chance, Yuriy. We should have run away when I told you."
Tala's throat clenched, salty tears stung his eyes.
They remained silent for a while, until they fought back the tears that tried to escape, and Tala finished bandaging his ally's hand. As soon he finished, Boris took out another pile of cigarette from his pocket.
"I know this is hard for you," Tala spoke up, "but I need to know specific details in sake of the team. I need to know if you and Alexa… if it's true at all… how you two will be able to work together?"
Boris shook his head again.
"I don't believe it was Alexa. It's impossible. That was a boy. He looked like a boy. And I felt when… when… For fucking god! I killed him, Tala! I killed that miserable boy! Choked him to death!"
He jumped up from the couch, pacing restlessly again in the room. Tala didn't know what to say to this. He was not there. He watched Boris helplessly, not sure how to provide comfort. He didn't know people how did that.
"You always had to kill to prove your value?" Tala asked instead, quietly because he didn't want to lure the Death to the room.
"I had to kill only once. I mean, human. I was practicing killing smaller animals previously. The next two years, I had to do field practice with guns. Then the accident happened in that tower. You know, the one that collapsed for some reason. After that, the whole KGB-project was shut down. Volkov directed me to practice only beyblade, moving me into the same group with you. I guess, he put already too many resources in my training to get rid of me." A weak smile appeared on his face at once. "I was walking on air, seeing you again whenever I wanted, being around to protect you. But I couldn't show it. I was scared that if Volkov had noticed it, he would have separated us again."
Tala's gaze dropped to the floor. He remembered that day when he had reunited with Boris, although he had lived that memory differently.
He had feared his friend, hadn't recognized him. His eyes had been vicious, his face had been wild. Tala was certain that his friend's soul had died there, so he had always tried to avoid him whenever he could.
He wouldn't have thought even in his dreams that the happiest memory of Boris from the Abbey was the same day that he counted his worst. They had had to work together in the same group again, just like on the streets, but Tala hadn't been able to trust him anymore. Boris hid his emotions too deep under his malicious mask.
"You've never talked about this to me. Why didn't you tell me?" Tala asked though he already had several possible answers in his head.
Staring out of the window, Boris replied without turning to him.
"I wanted to. Million times." He spoke quietly. Although, he was showing his back to Tala, the window and night lights mirrored his regretful face on the glass, exposing all vulnerability and sorrow in his soul.
"But I already saw the fear in your eyes whenever you talked to me. I was afraid that you wouldn't understand. You were the only thing that kept me sane in that hell. If I had told you the truth and you would have turned away from me… I don't think I could have handled that. I didn't dare taking that risk. Besides, I didn't want to disappoint you with the facts. You seemed happy in the Abbey in the last years, during the World Championship."
The honest words were like a clean, sharp knife in the bleeding wound in Tala's soul. He buried his face in his hands, trying to hide away from the ugly world and its ugly truth.
Boris had seen it well. Tala had enjoyed his last years in the abbey, it was his treasured secret before his team. He had been a proud, admired leader of his group – just like his father had been in the army. Everyone had obeyed and submitted to him, and he had enjoyed the power of it.
Neither Boris, Sergei, Ivan, nor even Kai had had such a 'good' life in the Abbey, so he had never talked about it to them. Tala knew he should have felt ashamed for enjoying his years in the Abbey, but sometimes he still missed the familiar cruel routines.
Knowing the other side of the truth, Tala was not sure he could handle the weight of this burden. How his pale friend was able to wear it for years was another mystery for him. Boris had had a good reason to be afraid of his reaction. Tala was certain that he would have acted the way his friend had feared, abandoning him because of the things he was not responsible for.
Boris was the only man who knew Tala's true face. Without his help, he would have died of hunger on Severodvinsk's streets. Boris had thought him the basics of surviving, how to put aside his honor, and steal, deceive money from helpful fools, prioritizing his own needs.
In the Abbey, Boris was the only man who had protected him from himself, not talking about the things that had happened between those walls, letting his redhead friend to live his life blindly, but happily.
Tala didn't deserve this position. He didn't deserve to be the captain of this team. He was not worthy for Boris' alliance. Tala was Volkov's favourite trainee, he should have done something! Volkov might have listened to him. All these years, he had been utterly oblivious what had happened to the others. He had enjoyed the attention he had got from Volkov and the children around him. Tala had been proud that he could serve the twisted man's plans.
What a stupid boy he had been! A stupid, vain boy, chasing silly, beyblade dreams meanwhile his friend had had to fight for his own life in the same place what he had thought his home once.
He heard the closing steps, but Tala couldn't look up yet. He didn't want Boris to see him in this pathetic state.
A heavy hand patted his back. The touch was warm, caring.
"It's okay, lil' bro. It's not your fault. We survived the hell. We're unstoppable now."
Tala chuckled weakly at Boris' nonchalant, rough voice.
What a comedy. It was Boris who was suffering, yet he was providing him comforting words, just like when they had been homeless.
Rising up, Tala quickly wiped the tears out of his eyes, then hesitantly lifted his long arms to pull the other into a hug. Boris was already waiting for him, wrapping his own arms around him.
They hugged each other tight, tapping gently the shoulder blades with open palms to remove the awkwardness from the moment. Tala didn't remember if they had hugged each other ever in their life, but it felt right now. Despite that any of them was a sentiment type.
"Aight. I gotta put out this cigarette, or I'm gonna burn you." Boris said, breaking the embrace.
He pressed the lit end against the table leg again, then went back to stare out of the window. The air between them was calm now. Fishing out his third pile, Boris lighted it.
"That'll be the last one." Tala warned him, thankful that his usual harsh tone had returned.
Boris didn't seem to listen, but Tala was sure he had heard him. He dropped himself back to the couch, watching the night sky with the undestroyable falcon in silence. He let them enjoy this peaceful moment in the eye of the storm.
"What if… it was her..." Boris pondered, inhaling the nicotine. His thoughts were somewhere else, it seemed.
Whipping around to look at his captain at once, his eyes widened in revelation, and Tala worried that Boris irreversibly went crazy this time.
"If it was truly her then I'm not a murderer." He breathed with a reborning hope in his voice, as if he was whispering a wish to a falling star.
Tala furrowed his eyebrows, contemplating the situation and what to do next. He had his doubts and concerns. If it had been true and Alexa was that kid, Boris had still almost killed her. Twice, including tonight.
He wanted to put the team together somehow, but it was not easy with the circumstances. For that, Boris and Alexa had to make a peace, but he was not sure how it could work between the two, or how to do it.
Also, there was the question if he should still kick Boris out of the team. He was unquestionably dangerous. But Tala also wanted to atone his mistakes as a friend, and Boris might have deserved a new chance. On the other hand, he couldn't know when Boris was going to go berserk again, hurting someone.
Furthermore, Kai, a member of a different team was also hurt during the fight. Tala cursed himself for threatening the grumpy phoenix with a report previously. Compering to what Kai had done to Alexandra and what Boris to him was chalk and cheese.
One thing was certain, though. He must hear Alexa's story before he made any decision.
"Maybe." Tala said, rubbing his palms together nervously. He was thinking hard how to phrase his next request as carefully as he could. "We'll speak with Alexa soon. But first, I need to know your version. What happened that you lost the control? What did she say?"
Blinking up at Boris' tall figure, Tala couldn't read the various expressions on the falcon's face though it seemed opener than ever. He looked confused, licking his lip before exhaling the smoke.
"She said something about you and Sergei. It sounded like a threat."
"A threat?" Tala furrowed his eyebrows. Anger and anxiety mixed with his suspicion. "Why would she threat us?"
The falcon shook his head to the question, still struggling to recall the scene.
"What happened next?" Tala pressed.
"I don't really remember." Boris admitted honestly. "My mind shut down."
oOoOo
Sergei's grip on Alexa's arm was firm but gentle as he led the girl back to her room. She was weeping, upset by the drama they had just run away from. Closing the door behind them, Sergei let her go in the middle of the room and watched her dumbfoundedly.
What now? Should he go back?
Tala hadn't told him so once he was done escorting Alexa to her room though Sergei would have gone back with pleasure. He wanted to know what was going on.
But the captain only told him to take Alexa somewhere safe. He should stay. Tala would call him if he was needed anyway.
Alexa was weeping so sadly. He should give her some comfort. Calm her.
But how?
Telling her that everything was alright? Clearly, it was not. Sergei himself was shaken up by what he had just heard.
Alexa was the boy Boris had killed?
That just didn't make sense. Any sense. There must be a misunderstanding. It was obviously some metaphor he couldn't get without the proper details. Yes, that sounded better. Sergei could stick to that, settling his own nerves for now.
He looked up at the girl before him, she was eyeing the dresser in the corner as she was drying the tears on her bloodied face, calming slowly down.
Sergei put his huge hands on her fragile shoulders, and Alexa instantly turned her head at him, her only eye swam in fear.
"It's alright. It's alright. You don't have to worry." He said clumsily, a poor attempt to console her. He didn't know he could speak so softly though. Maybe it was enough now.
Alexa nodded insecurely.
"Your face is covered with blood." Sergei noted uncomfortably. "I think you should wash it. Do you need me to help?"
"No."
Alexa stepped away from him and disappeared in the bathroom.
Sergei breathed out with ease. Thankfully, she had her pride. It would have been awkward if he had had to do it for her.
While he was left alone in the room, Sergei looked around. Alexa's room seemed to be normal. Not too messy, not too organized. Her personal stuff was packed away, he didn't find any object that he could connect directly to her.
When she returned, her face was clean, and the wound on her temple was sealed with a medical patch. Alexa stopped before him, swaying uncertainly like she had been a stranger in her own room. She continuously glanced at the dresser as if she was expecting from it something.
"What's in the dresser? Baba Yaga(**)?" Sergei joked, trying to ease the tension.
"Huh?" Alexa was clearly not present.
"You keep looking at that closet. Do you want me to check it?"
"No! There's nothing in there." Her reply was unexpectedly harsh though Sergei quickly forgot it.
She was obviously in an unpredictable state of mind. She must be as confused as him, she stood there so helplessly and lost.
"I-uh… I need distortion." Alexa said as she rubbed her aching head.
"Distortion?" Sergei frowned.
"Dis… Distraction! Yes."
Sergei frowned more.
"Let's beybattle!" Alexa offered enthusiastically.
She already grabbed the doorknob, ready to leave, when Sergei stopped her.
"We can't. Kai destroyed my Seaborg and we have yet finished the reparation with Tala."
Alexa's excitement disappeared from her eye instantly, pacing back to Sergei with disappointment.
Then she suddenly perked up again.
"Okay, we repair him then!" She decided, pulling out a box under the bed.
Sergei helped her to put it on the coffee table, it seemed heavy. When Alexa opened it up, the box contained many beyblade parts, rings and various gears.
"Impressing collection. Where did you get them?"
"Oh, you know… here and there." Alexa replied evasively as she was rooting through the parts and rings. She opened her palm expectantly before Sergei. "Give me the core, please."
Sergei hesitated for a second. He trusted Tala more, but Alexandra seemed to know what she was doing. Also, she visibly needed this distraction.
Not so enthusiastically, he took out his incomplete Seaborg from his pocket and gave it to her.
"I'll try to finish it for you before I have to leave." Alexa promised, examining thoroughly the core, how to continue the build.
"Before you leave?" Sergei raised his brows.
Alexa chuckled dryly.
"What, you seriously think that Tala will send Boris away? No. They're friends. He will find a reason to forgive him, so he needs to punish someone else for the fight, and that will be me. This is how things normally go."
"I think you misjudge Tala." Sergei disapproved after a longer pause, not encouraging the girl in her self-pitying. "He makes irreversible decisions only when he has a good reason for that. Though your arrogance is quite challenging to ignore sometimes…"
Surprisingly, Alexa chuckled again at his words.
"I learnt from the best."
Whoever she meant, Sergei was relieved he saw the girl smiling, the tension between them finally faded a bit.
Small, clicking sounds continously broke the silence as Alexa was trying to link the parts together with forceps. Sergei tried to avoid the question, he didn't want to upset her, but couldn't resist against his curiosity.
"What happened between you and Boris?"
Green eye met his briefly, delaying her respond.
"You mean tonight or in the past?"
"Mostly in the past."
"I won't tell you." Alexa denied immediately, focusing on her work. "If Boris didn't tell you, I won't either."
Sergei watched her, searching for a different strategy in his mind.
"Then tell me why Boris attacked you."
Alexa sighed, annoyed by the question, but for Sergei's surprise, she didn't leave him without an answer.
"I already told it. Unluckily, I said the exact words that apparently triggered him. Everyone has a weak spot, and I happen to know where Boris' is."
Her implicit reply was not helpful, Sergei didn't learn anything new. Only more questions came up in his mind while Alexa continued.
"I didn't want to cause disharmony in your team. I tried to ignore the past. Guess, I was not prepared for a championship to be so stressful. I can't believe that fucking jerk was right! I'm a freaking cancer that drains the life. I should have died a long time ago…" Alexa chided herself with a growl as she tried to insert a small part into Seaborg unsuccessfully.
Sergei silently watched her grumbling, not sure if she meant these words to his ears, but he heard them, nonetheless.
"Who told you that?" He asked.
"Vladimir Gregorovitch, who else." Alexa snarled, her lips twisted with disgusted loathing mentioning his name.
She was still fumbling with the tiny part, not able to direct her shaking hand properly. Sergei noticed the frustration in her and stopped her trembling hand with his.
"You're not a cancer. You're a Blitzkriegs member. And Tala won't send you away. Believe me, I know him."
At the kind gesture, Alexa's body deflated like a balloon, exhaling her anxiety with one breath.
"I don't know. I'm scared of him." She admitted.
Before Sergei could say anything at the odd confession, the phone started to ring loudly in the room.
"I'll take it." He offered, hurrying to pick it up.
"Yes?"
"Sergei? How's Alexa?" Asked Tala's voice. It sounded unusually gloomy.
"Fine, I guess." Sergei shrugged, careful what to say in her presence.
"Come over. I need to talk with you."
Hanging up the receiver, Sergei turned to the girl who was too preoccupied with Seaborg to realize that the brief conversation had already ended.
"The captain called me to talk. I leave Seaborg here with you until then."
Alexa didn't bother to respond as Sergei silently took his leave.
oOoOo
Alexa was grateful for the silence, knowing it would not hurt her while she worked comfortably.
She was almost done with Seaborg when the phone rung again, and Yuriy asked her to go to the team's common room. She didn't anticipate this moment. Boris probably had told them already that she had tried to strangle him, providing Yuriy with the perfect reason to send her away.
It was a good month though. She enjoyed the time with the team, despite the amount of stress she must have dealt with.
When she stepped in the common room, she immediately noticed the looming atmosphere in it. The lamps gave warm dim lights, but the room was stuffed with horrific memories.
She was nervous. Her heart pounded wildly in her chest, knowing too well that the redhead was about to announce his forgiveness to his friend, and kick her out instead.
Alexa found Yuriy at the desk, Sergei – who looked like someone not able to recover from his shock – and Boris were lounging on the couch, as usual. His nose finally stopped bleeding, he cleaned up his messy face and changed his blood-soaked shirt. He automatically glanced up at the arrival, but when his gaze met with Alexa's, he quickly looked away. She did the same.
"Sit down." Yuriy directed her, pointing at the armchair that stood in the center of the focus.
Not eagerly but she obeyed, shifting uncomfortably under their eyes.
"There are several things we have to discuss." Yuriy begun, taking a deep breath before he continued. "I want to keep together this team, but for that, I need to know about the risks and dangers that we may face later, on the championship. Tonight, it was proved that Boris can go stark raving mad in particular situations. I assume, Alexa, when you told us that you and he received the same training, you were referring to Volkov's plan to train KGB-agents in the Abbey."
Not surprised that Yuriy already knew this delicate information about them, she nodded firmly.
"You told me that Volkov trained girls in the Abbey. Did all of them receive the same training?" Yuriy asked, folding loosely his arms before his chest, waiting expectantly for her reply.
Alexa frowned at him then at the two boys.
"Is this an interrogation now?" She bit, sensing the lurking threat around her.
"No. You don't have to answer if you don't want to. But I'd appreciate your honesty this time." Yuriy pressed, the blue eyes were piercing and cold again.
"Oh, so if I want to stay in the team, I must talk. That's what you wanna say, right?" Alexa clarified in a cynic tone.
"If you want me, us to trust you, it'd be better if we know your part in this story." Yuriy corrected him patiently.
Alexa breathed out through her nose, uncertain what to do. She didn't want to tell anything about her past, that led to nothing good, and she felt utterly uncomfortable under their judgement like she was sitting on an interrogation bench.
"I guess, I better go pack then." She said, rising from the chair.
"Don't forget what I've told you, Alexa. You're already a Blitzkriegs member." Sergei reminded her in his deep, calming voice that made her stop abruptly.
His face was sweaty, it must have been not easy to learn all the awful things about his friend, Alexa guessed.
"Alexa, I'm not kicking you out." Tala said with determination, stepping closer to her. "We respect your decision if you don't want to talk about it. I just highlighted to the fact that it would help us to understand your perspective more easily. I've had enough with the secrets and lies, I prefer to know the people I have to work with to win the championship."
To understand her perspective? What a sweet-talk to get information from her…
She didn't trust Yuriy. He couldn't convince her with these words. Alexa kept staring at him with running thoughts in her mind, trying to find out what his true intentions might be and how she could avoid the questions.
Yuriy must have recognized her concern, because he loosened his arms after a heavy sigh, and started to speak with unusual honesty.
"Boris and I met on the streets after we ran away from home. Our fathers beat us, our lives were in danger with them. We were ready to die with hunger on streets when Volkov found and took us to the Abbey."
Alexa listened to her with tensed muscles, hiding her shock that the captain shared with her such details about his childhood. She knew Yuriy was not a chatty type about his life and problems, despite that he constantly liked barking orders.
"Sergei was dumped by his own family because he had trillion siblings and they couldn't feed him. So, they practically sold him to Volkov. Now, you know vaguely where we came from. We have a shameful past we want to bury, but not before each other. We're in the same boat, we grew up in the same shithole. There's no point of the secrets. You're just like us." Yuriy finished, boring his clear blue eyes into hers.
God damn it, his tactic was working! Alexa already felt that she was going to walk into the trap and tell them important details about herself. Details she had never talked about to anyone in her life.
She didn't know what to do. Alexa was almost touched by Yuriy's last words when he said they were the same, and she sensed the small ray of hope rising in her soul. She wanted nothing else but to belong to somewhere, to someone, and suspiciously enough, the redhead just offered it for her. She wasn't sure she could afford another heartbreak, another disappointment in the faith of humanity.
Still, for the first time, the three boys' faces were not wild or deterrent, but open and inviting. It was hard to resist the temptation.
"Alright." Alexa said as she sniffed, easing herself down to the armchair. She was still not certain if she was doing the right thing, but… seriously, what worse could happen to her? She was eager to ease the burden on her shoulders.
"The answer to your question is a yes and a no."
Naturally, the boys frowned at her reply in confusion, so she explained it further. It was not easy to talk about these things. Alexa had had to learn for years how to hide this information in her brains, not leaking anything involuntarily out in any case, whereas now she was telling her greatest secret three teenage boys.
"Volkov's original plan was to train girls to be KGB-agents. Women are less suspicious, so it was not a dumb idea though he was struggling to convince his sponsors to fund this project for him. He didn't collect enough money to continue the training for us, and suddenly, he had to solve how to finance the 'well-being' of twenty or so girls."
She had yet said any specific outcome, but Yuriy swallowed in frightened shock. He was a clever man after all. The room was uncomfortably silence as they boys were listening to her with stiffened back. They had been never so interested in what she was saying before.
"So," Alexa said tentatively, knowing well that her next words were going to cause disturbance. "He started to use us as lab rats. He was doing the experiments with highest risks on us, making the processes safe before he used them on you."
She locked her eye onto Yuriy, referring to the chip in his head. Three of her groupmates had had to endure the great pain and had to die for that technology. The captain's chest heaved, his eyes widened in desperation, but Alexa acknowledged his upset state only with a cold shoulder. She turned to Boris and directed her next words to him.
"Along with that, one year, there was an exam for the boys on which they had to prove their strong loyalty to BioVolt and Volkov himself with a murder. This was a morbid ritual for them to get rid of their young innocence and become a deadly soldier for Russia. For that, Volkov needed targets that had to be weaker than the boys themselves, not making the fight too hard for them. He wanted to ensure the future KGB-agents passed the exam. But, it was also important for the target to be a human soul, so the boys could gain the experience of killing someone authentically." Alexa scoffed in a dark tone. "We came handy for this purpose. Volkov finally could get rid of us, erasing every evidence of our existence. And slowly, my groupmates disappeared one after other, leaving only empty cells around me."
The silence sat so long in the room, Alexa thought the globe stopped rotating under their feet. Her heart was still beating uncontrollably, filling her body with pure anxiety. It felt like she was in a dream. Because it was no way she was talking about her life in the Abbey after the many years of silence.
The shock of her teammates, the lack of their reaction soon became uncomfortable for her, unwillingly implying that it was her fault that brought so much pain in the team.
Like a cancer that drained the life from the organs…
"So, you lived in the abbey, too? Just like us?"
Alexa expected questions from Yuriy or Boris, but for her surprise, Sergei shattered the deafening silence among them, forcing the others to leave their stupor as well.
"Yes, I did."
She caught as Yuriy's eyebrows twitched in puzzlement at her reply. Soon, she was going to receive some unpleasant questions from him…
"I don't understand…" Sergei growled in a deep tone, struggling to see through his teammate's situation. "How we never saw any girl in the Abbey? How didn't Boris recognize you as a girl?"
"They always cut our hair very short. Volkov did everything not to reveal to anyone girls lived in the Abbey. He would have lost his position with that. Only boys were allowed to live in the Abbey, but you know this. Most of the time, they kept us underground, in the dungeons."
Sergei hummed disapprovingly.
"Why did you tell me that you lived outside of the Abbey then? Why did you lie?" The mistrust reappeared in Yuriy's voice, furrowing his eyebrows at her.
"Because if I had told you I lived in the Abbey, that would have led only to more questions." Alexa replied simply. "You didn't trust me from the beginning, and I know how suspicious you are, Yuriy."
"You still shouldn't have lied." Yuriy insisted, putting a hand on his hip.
This was what Alexa feared. The captain was already closing in, blaming her for everything that had happened because he was not able to handle the trauma in a proper way. For him, she was still just an outsider who disturbed the false harmony in his team. She had no doubts that Sergei and Boris were going to follow him soon, teaming up against her.
"What did you expect from me, really?" She laughed darkly. "Even Boris, your friend couldn't tell you the truth, how could I?"
Yuriy glanced at the falcon, uncertain what to say to that. Alexa knew she made a valid point he couldn't disprove.
Another uncomfortable silence conquered the room as they were processing the overwhelming details she shared with them.
"How did you survive?" Boris asked in a low voice eventually.
Looking at his unusually vivid pale eyes, Alexa recognized that he still couldn't believe she had been the boy he had had to kill, though desperately longed for an evidence that proved she was saying the truth.
"That's a good question." Tala agreed, still suspicious. "How did you survive?"
Alexa swallowed hard. She knew the two boys asked two things with the same question. She had to be careful with her words now.
"After Boris strangled me, the medics of the Abbey brought me back. I don't know how, but they managed to save my life." Alexa folded her arms, staring at her lap with furrowed forehead, wishing silently it wouldn't have happened that way. "As I know, none of the other girls survived this trial, and Vladimir Gregorovitch considered my return as a miracle. He said I was worthy to have a greater purpose, and immediately started my training. I was trained mostly alone, I had to stay under cover while I was learning the same skills."
"Did you also have trials?"
"Yes."
"Did you… Did you have to kill someone?" The shyness sounded foreign in Boris' voice, it didn't suit well to the boy, Alexa thought. She preferred him when he acted savagely, with confidence.
She stared at him for a few, long seconds, considering whether to answer this question. She already told them too many things Alexa wanted to take with herself to the grave.
"I won't answer this question." She declined firmly at last, though the bobbing throats on the necks showed the boys were speculating the truth.
Eventually, Yuriy let out a heavy sigh and shook his head, and Alexa didn't understand why until he spoke up.
"That man should have died a long time ago. He should suffer for his sins. How could he get away with all of this?" His thin lips distorted with disgust, his clear, blue eyes burnt with detestation.
"That's something we all can agree on." Boris growled, twisting his lips, as well.
"He's always been dangerously clever, hm." Sergei mused.
Alexa was taken aback, blinking almost dumbly at the boys' strong feelings. Despite confessing them that she was practically a murderous, living weapon, they sympathized with her. She expected judging, frightened looks, but they gave none of that.
"Boris said you threatened my and Sergei's life during the fight, and this made him go crazy." Yuriy said, diverting the topic to a different track. "What did you say to him exactly?"
"I said he wouldn't be able to protect you two from someone like me." Alexa shifted uncomfortably again in embarrassment. It was awkward to admit something like that to her captain, to her teammates who she was supposed to trust. "I was referring to Volkov. He has the same military skills, just like us."
Pausing for a moment, she couldn't stop herself saying the next words.
"I wanted to evoke the same reaction from him as on his trial. I wanted to prove to myself that I was not the same helpless child against him. That I can stand a chance against such a threat! But I was wrong. I'm not stronger. I'm just as useless as a nine-year-old child. My training was a failure. Vladimir Gregorovitch would be disappointed..."
She felt the weight of her memories was squeezing the air out of her lungs, suffocating her. She covered her eye to hide the leaking tears that unstoppably ran down on her face, though no matter how hard she tried, she couldn't stop the sound of her quiet crying.
What a pathetic sight she was now before these strong, unsentimental boys. Alexa could say goodbye to her dignity in their eyes, but even that thought couldn't subdue the waving rage in her chest.
"You wouldn't be part of this team if you weren't strong." Boris reassured her.
That made Alexa cry only even more. She didn't want to hear his hurtful lies!
"I don't need your pity!" She managed to say, keeping hidden her gaze. Her miserable weeping was in perfect contradiction with her harsh reply.
"Don't even try, Boris. You've always been bad with the girls." Sergei deadpanned and Boris responded with a groan.
"Alexa." Yuriy's tone suggested he had enough with the crying.
He removed her hand from her eye, so Alexa had to look at him. She noticed with a surprise that he was already sitting next to her on a chair that originally belonged to the desk at the wall.
Amazingly, now that she had to stare at Yuriy's piercing eyes, Alexa was able to quieten her crying; frantically wiping the tears from her face to compose herself.
"Is there something else you want to tell us?"
Alexa shook her head. She felt tired. She didn't want to talk anymore.
"Are you sure? Like what is that might trigger you? Just so we can avoid these situations in the future." Yuriy queried.
Alexa froze. She knew what Yuriy wanted from her – a confession. If she wanted his trust, she must tell him now that she too had tried to strangle Boris. The captain asked this question for a reason. Yuriy probably knew it already, but he wanted to hear it from her.
It was futile to keep this information from him. But she was not going to talk about her weak spot!
"There's something. I'm sure Boris already told you this, but during the fight, I nearly… you know, choked him."
"What?" Boris cut in dumbfoundedly, not believing his ears.
"How?" Yuriy asked with a similar shock.
"When I removed him from Kai. I locked him in a death grip from behind to suffocate him." Alexa ignored the wide-eyed faces and hid behind her emotionless mask again.
"Fuck, I remember now…" Boris whispered, rubbing his neck absentmindedly as he revived the scene in his head.
"Didn't he tell you?" Alexa frowned at the captain who shook his head.
"His memory is foggy, he doesn't remember what he did. How did you stop?" Yuriy asked quickly, not letting her to shift the focus.
"It was Kai. Kai stopped me." Alexa admitted with a defeated sigh. "He saved both of us tonight, I guess."
Alexa glared at the falcon who, once again, looked back with an uncharacteristically apologetic face.
"Damn. If you don't remember at all, I shouldn't have said it." She cursed with a breath, regretting her decision to be honest for the first time. "But why were you so hostile with me then? I thought you recognized me and knew who I was. Why else would you challenge me to fight?"
The tension suddenly was replaced with confusion. Boris eyed her with the familiar menacing glare, not sure what to say at first.
"The fuck are you talking about?" He blurted out not really in an elegant way. "You were the one who insulted me in front of others. I was mean because you were rude with me from the beginning!"
"Oh?" Alexa raised a brow and recoiled at the surprisingly indignant retort.
Then she recalled the memories when she had made a drama not to sit with him on the plane, or when she had offended him with unkind remarks, or when she had got angry with him for not attacking her beyblade with full power because she had been dead tired.
Alexa thought Boris had been simply arrogant with her, but maybe, maybe he had been just trying to be friendly with her. In his own way. And when she had refused it viciously, Boris had got offended and bit back.
"Oh." She said again, admitting her mistake.
Boris made an annoyed growl in the back of his throat at her realization. The pause in the conversation felt awkward now.
"Sorry." Alexa said sheepishly.
"Whatever." Boris waved her off.
"I told you. You're bad with girls." Sergei piped in again.
"Stop repeating that." Boris snarled with gritted teeth and closed eyes.
"Maybe you should try your fortune with the boys. You might have more success with them." Sergei offered with a shrug, barely able to suppress his smirk, knowing how much this suggestion would provoke his narrow-minded friend.
Boris' eyes dangerously snapped open, sending a side-glance to the muscled guy beside him.
"Careful, Sergei, or I'm gonna switch into God-mode again."
Sergei snorted at the threat, brushing it off easily, not worried at the slightest.
Alexa listened to their little dispute with an unamused glare. These two idiots never knew when to quit, however, she had to admit, they smoothed the tension with their mocking remarks in the room. It was easier to handle the stress this way; with playfulness. Maybe she should learn from them.
Before they could continue though, Yuriy unexpectedly rose from his chair with an exasperated sigh, ending the long, tiring discussion. The team automatically mirrored his move, each of them ceremoniously standing up from the couch and armchair.
"Too many attempted murders I can deal with on a single day." Yuriy muttered under his nose, brushing back his two red strands that immediately fell back to his face. "Boris tried to kill you, you tried to kill him. I consider you even." He drew a cross with his hand in the air as if he was extracting the curse from the souls of his two violent teammates that infuriated the murderous intention in them.
If the situation hadn't been so serious, Alexa would have laughed at the method how Yuriy handled such a crucial conflict in the team. The captain seemed tired. They all were tired. This day was already too long.
"What now?" Sergei dared to ask the most important question. "Will Boris stay with us?"
Both Alexa and Boris looked at the captain with concern, waiting for his decision.
"I need to reconsider it. I learnt too much information for today. We'll continue tomorrow." He said, rubbing his stiff neck. "But first, I have to speak with Kai. Boris, you're coming with me. You have to apologize to him. This is the least after what you have done to him."
Boris was visibly not enthusiastic about the idea, but he didn't protest. Yuriy turned to his two blonde teammates.
"You two can go, have a rest. We'll meet tomorrow morning in the training room."
Alexa nodded, grateful for being dismissed finally. She wanted nothing else, but to crash into her bed and forget everything that happened that day.
A/N:
KGB - It was the main security agency for the Soviet Union.
(*) - Archangel Oblast is an existing region in Russia. The detail that Tala and Boris were born in Severodvinsk is not my idea, they officially met with Volkov there according to the manga.
(**) - Baba Yaga is an ogress who steals and eats children in the Slavic folklore.
That's it, ladies, gentlemen! I hope you liked this plot twist in the story, I worked really hard with this chapter. I don't know why, it was very exhausting for me. I hope I didn't mess up or missed out any important details. Don't be surprise though if I edit this chapter later. I know myself too well... Anyway, let me know what you think!
Also, thank you again to everyone for the awesome support I get from you! I want to express my special gratitude to La la Land who always proof-reads my writing after an upload, making the reading experience better for the others! *heart*
With the next chapter, the focus will be mainly on Kai again. Until the next upload!