AN: Long update and I do apologize for a long wait. I have a lot going on in my personal life but these next two day's i'm working on the next chapters and I'm going to try to release one to two more chapters over the next two days. So I heavily apologize! . Thank you guys so much for following and liking my story as well as some of the comments ^^ I haven't gotten too many but I'll take that as a sign that it's a good story so far? Anyway a lot of fluff and small trigger warning to abuse. Anyway, Enjoy! -R.M
Emma woke up that next morning and got herself ready. She had no classes but decided that she would read and take a small tour in the gardens to clear her ever deafening mind. As she pulled on a light cape for warmth, she picked up her rucksack and made her way out of her room and down the halls of the palace. She fell into the routine and noticed the same people outside doing their daily jobs each time she walked out at this hour.
This whole predicament had been topsy-turvy, keeping the blonde on her toes and she would be a liar if she said she didn't completely enjoy her time with the old queen. She had somewhat gotten closer with Regina in Neverland and now, well now she is learning of the woman behind the regality.
As Emma continued, making her way around the corner and towards the doors to exit the palace, she heard voices near and hid against the wall near a statue of some sort of deity she's guessing.
"I think there is more to her than that my dear." An all to familiar tone came and Emma instantly felt irritated by it.
"If so, it will come out. But no need to force anything now Mal. I know you are just looking out for me, but let's not dwell on such trivial things right now. " The exasperated queen voiced out, peaking the woman's interest.
An audible sigh could be heard. "As you wish, I'm just giving you my council as I have always said I would. In any case….I do have to meet with others for a week to two weeks time. I'm glad to have spent the night with you, but please if you do need anything….anything at all you know how to get ahold of me." Maleficent's voice sounded softer, almost insecure. Emma sneaked a slight glance at the usually stone cold woman and wondered how invested the two were with each other.
Holding her breath, she heard Regina talk with the same softer tone, but not holding nearly the amount of conviction nor emotion that the dragon did.
"I will, now get there and back safely alright…" Her tender voice came out almost more comforting than Emma knew possible. She watched as Regina fixed the woman's dress and jacket before smiling up at her. "Now hurry." She whispered and as she watched the queen about to pull back, Maleficent gripped the womans forearm and tugged her to her, bending her gently while cupping her face with her free hand and placed a passionate kiss on her lips. Regina's eyes closed and her face softened while Maleficent's eyes gazed ahead of her and made contact with Emma's green prying orbs.
Emma almost fell backward from shock as she had almost fell over, was this a competition she had no idea she was competing in? As she slowly made a trek backwards, she decided of going another way towards her desired location and as she put some distance between herself and the duo, she then felt someone grab her and put a hand over her mouth while hot breath pressed to her ears.
"Know your place…." The mature alluring voice came out. "She is a queen and you are nothing more than a lost sheriff girl long away from her home. Behave while I'm gone, or it is the last mistake you will make besides the idea to somehow go through that god forsaken portal you claim to have fallen through." And no sooner did the last word leave her mouth did the woman disappear into thin air and left Emma stay to her own thoughts.
She stood there for a good moment in wonderment, this idea of Maleficent is quite a twist on the story of sleeping beauty and this whole idea of Regina and her being lovers, well…she'd be a damn liar if she didn't think the fallen queen hadn't dabbled in the fairer sex.
Fixing her cape and ruffling her tousled blond curly hair, Emma let out a deep sigh and wondered how much more would happen between them before she completely fucked up this time and caused further issues in the future. This was way out of her element, hell she hadn't even had magic all that long nor does she know anything about controlling anything and wonders to herself when she will let herself slip and then fuck up everything.
As Emma walked out to the vast garden and saw none other than queen herself in all her fair glory. She was standing under the apple tree with a goblet in her one hand and a lost expression spread across her face. She looked beautiful and troubled; a near poster for beautiful tragedy.
Emma was about to turn, wanting nothing to do with upsetting the mentor of the queen. But, as she was about to head away she heard her name being called out and cursed silently under her breath.
"Emma, join me won't you?" The queen called out. "Since you are my loyal subject I do have a question."
Turning on her heels, she faces the woman and slowly walks to her. "What would be troubling you my queen?"
"I am curious, now that there are no ears to overhear and no company…why did you agree to be my subject?"
"Mn-" Emma paused and breathed out a soft hum. "You remind me a lot of the woman who adopted my son I suppose." Not a complete lie, she tells herself. "You do seem fierce and…pardon my language, but pretty damn crazy when you lose your temper but, I also know that people aren't just that way from living a wonderful privileged life and much like her…I see the demons in your eyes that I saw in hers and I felt that….perhaps if she had someone who didn't choose sides or be biased….maybe, perhaps…her soul would have been saved a lot of heartache." Emma thought of the woman who had desperately fought for her son, the woman who fought back tears as she watched him leave her, the woman who looked utterly broken and terrified despite her strong mask when the town chased after her. She looked in front of her and saw the still hurt woman, and truth be told, it broke Emma's heart, because no one deserves to be that alone or hurt.
"I see...you are like some sort of saviour then." Regina snickered and looked up at the apples on each branch with a soft sigh. "You know, no one just chooses to grace me with their presence unless they want something. Are you saying that you are different?" Regina then glared slightly ahead of her, knuckles turning white.
"I am not saying I'm a saviour…but I'd like to just be Emma…I want to give you aide when you ask of it and I want to help how I can. I don't expect anything than my life for myself and I mean what could I want? I'm still learning the ways of your world and for all I know, you're not a so called 'evil queen' for what I gather; you lead with an iron fist sure….but from what I've learned George is a tyrant, King Stephan is an imbecile with a power hungry streak…the sultan stays to his own devices, Arendelle are recluses who have let their people starve on multiple occasions because they don't want to open their gates to trade. So…from what I've seen on your trade system, your economy, agriculture, and military system is that you are the most lenient as well as most flourishing country. So what then makes you evil…Re-My queen?" Emma challenged.
Regina looked like a fish out of water almost, being told everything that she already knew but from the mouth of someone who had nothing to gain or lose, what did this mean? She felt her words die on her tongue before trying her best to gather her composure."
"Well, I have wiped out villages before….I have killed people…taken hearts…manipulated and used people and you can say that I'm not evil?" Regina questioned almost incredulously.
Emma looked at her and though she wore her makeup, her jewels, her beautiful dress she still looked like a young girl who had been through her fair share of pain. Emma could recognize it as she herself had been through her own demons and was still dealing with the results of her own terrible doings. Granted, it was never on the scale of Regina's grand performance; but it was definitely a different time she was living in and had she been born in the enchanted forest during that tie, she could have been just as bad.
"Well" She paused. "I've learned that evil is never born, it is made. And I can tell a tortured soul as I myself had been manipulated, abused, and hurt by my fair share of people who said they would love and protect me." Emma said and though she wanted to sound firm, a small crack could still be heard.
"You know, I'm never going to say you were right in all of that but…. Hasn't there been worse things done by different Kings? By previous wizards or witches? Were any of them labeled as such? Were any of them ridiculed by others? I've seen you and your interaction with your mentor, I've seen the way you treat the maids with care and I see the pondering look on your face when I walk into a room and it's just you. I think, I'm a good judge of character and I see passion, a passion that…forgive me if I speak out of context, but a passion that no one has ever taken the time to help you flourish in." Emma finished and she felt her heart thrum in her chest almost painfully. She knew she spoke too much and most of what she was talking about was things that she observed from her time with Regina in Storybrooke.
With a hammering heart and a pregnant silence, she felt her eyes linger on the tensed jaw of the queens as she looked deep in thought.
"Well.… " Regina cleared her throat. "You are quite an observer I do suppose. You are one interesting woman Emma." Regina lifted her goblet before taking a slow drink of the contents, feeling the warmth fill her throat and stomach as it slid down. Her brown eyes gazed ahead and though there was indeed still silence, it was a bit more comfortable.
"I just wonder….why it is that no one else see's me? Have I really just been a tyrant who everyone wants to overthrow so that damned woman can be queen?" She asked and if one looked hard enough, one could see a glistening spread across those beautiful brown eyes. "I tried to let her lead once when she was young, and I set it up myself to see how she could handle it. She was so bull headed and thought this world was blue birds and rainbows…it's not. It is not all happy endings, it's not all beautiful, and it's not always what you want it to be." She almost sneered, laughing in a sad broken glee that did not go unnoticed.
Emma, though fearfully had walked closer and gently brushed some hair behind the woman's shoulder; throwing caution to the wind and pushing back the voice in her head that said this was a bad idea.
"That's because not everyone has been through pain or hurt….some haven't fallen asleep with tear filled eyes and a loneliness that is satiated. Some can never see behind strong eyes that were forced to be strong, and some can never see the hurt that lay's below the clothing and within the skin." Emma whispered and she saw a lone tear fall down Regina's eye and roll down her cheek.
Emma brushed it softly away with her thumb and showed a small smile. "There's always more to a story than what everyone say's My Queen and I choose you." She whispered and felt her heart ache and the hurt that etched across the woman's face.
Why, why did she feel such a way. Why did she care so much, why was it Regina? She asked herself this many a times, even back in Storybrooke, she put the woman first before herself. She put herself between Regina and the crowd, she believed her when no one else did, and when she believed in the brunette their magic was unparalleled.
"You're a fool." Regina whispered as she felt her voice break and the strength she held onto began to crumble.
"Maybe, but I know I chose right my queen. Because everyone deserves someone who will stand by their side." She said softly and she slowly smiled, her hand gently grasping the cup in the brunettes hand and set it down.
"Care and even love is weakness Emma." Regina backed up slowly, her hand clutching the cloth that sat above her heart.
"Perhaps, but it is also a strength. It can help you fight and have reason to fight, it can give you the light that helps pull you from the dark and it can help the loneliness." Emma rebutted while walking closer to her and stood right in front of the seemingly smaller woman. "I'm not asking you to love me or even look at me as this person. But, just give in to what your heart say's sometimes." She said above a whisper as if the words would scare the woman.
Regina looked up at Emma, maybe she was a saviour. She shone so much brighter, her green eyes were an abundance that withheld the secret's her heart desires, her pink lips spoke truth, her hair gleamed gold within the suns highest peak and she shone so much brighter than any star in the sky.
"If you're right…why are you helping me. Tell me again, tell me!" She almost yelled and tears begged to fall. No one chose her, no one was with her on anything. Maleficent wanted her love and though that was just fine she couldn't fully love the woman because hell she barely knew the emotion.
"Because every lost girl deserves to be found, every hurting girl deserves to hear that it will be ok, every girl that had been abused deserves to hear that she never deserved that and things will now get better…..Because My Queen…you deserve to have someone choose to hear you and choose you and I do choose you. Now, if you don't believe me….meet me here at sunset and I can repeat these things to you. " Emma smiled and took the woman's hand gently and pressed her soft thin lips against her knuckles before bowing her head and let go gently. "I bid you a good day." She softly whispered and turned on her heel and decided to go to the library.
Regina, after the woman had left fell to her knees and the sounds of her mothers voice echoed in her head.
'Foolish girl love is weakness, friendship is weakness, you are powerful and you are all you need'
'I told you to not trust anyone but me, you foolish child!'
"Stop" She cracked out and held her head as tears built up in her eyes.
'Oh now you want me to stop?! Who are you to tell me what to do, I am you're mother and I know best!'
'You are a disgrace, you do not know anything about being a proper queen. I'm so disappointed!'
"Mom please stop." She whispered and clenched her eyes closed as the visions of her past flooded her mind, the painful memories resurfacing and at the softest of touches, she flinched. "NO!" she screamed and looked up in a dazed fright to see the small older man that she had known her whole life.
"Oh Regina." A man with a soft note of a spanish accent said in a most loving tone and scooped the woman up in his arms. "She's not here anymore….it's ok and I'm so sorry." He said softly and she laid her head into the man's chest.
"Daddy.…" She cracked out softly as she shook in his arms . That is when one wall broke down and she knew that this was terrifying and that more was potentially to come.
Emma paced around the gardens as the sun just sat over the mountains and she looked at the candle lit path as well as the guitar in the corner. She sighed softly and walked to it and picked it up, putting her makeshift strap around her and began strumming softly and began to hum a song she knew by heart as she had fallen in love with the artist. 'Perfect' by Ed Sheeran, the lyrics coming into her head but she wasn't about to sing it as she didn't think she was ready to even say them to the woman as she was unclear where the two stood and she wasn't sure if it would be a mistake.
Her eyes closed and back turned towards the double doors, she swayed a bit and didn't see the presence of a woman behind her as she hummed the song while strumming the guitar. Her eyes flooded with the memories of her and Regina in Storybrooke, how didn't she see how they worked so well together? How did she not see the pain etched in the queens eyes that day they left Storybrooke the day of Pan's curse. Regina Mills, Regina damned mills was holding back so many tears and the look in her eyes when they locked eyes were so unreadable but, now…it made so much sense. She cared about Emma and she earned her trust and care…perhaps love and she trusted Emma enough to take care of the only person she loved; their son.
"That's beautiful.…" Came a husky voice behind her that she'd grown fond of. She turned and a sheepish smile spread across her lips.
"How long have you been there?" Emma asked curiously; her fingers still strumming the guitar in an almost nervous fashion.
"Long enough, do you have lyrics or….is it just a song for the guitar?" Regina asked and walked to the edge of her apple tree and sat on the spot beside it as she pressed down her powder blue dress that had soft diamond accents and white trim.
Emma took in the look of the queen and found it appealing, soft, innocent and she loved it on her.
"It does but I cannot recall all of them." She smiled a bit before walking closer and hummed. "I had the chef make us some seafood pasta in a tomato sauce and since it's nice I thought we could eat here and talk, perhaps."
"Why are you doing this for someone you barely know?" Regina asked and looked up at the blonde.
"Why did you spare me?" Emma retorted.
"Because.…I thought it might be a good politics move…" She whispered and looked away. Emma's lying sense was dinging a bit.
"And what else?" She asked with an arched brow.
"I don't know." Regina answered softly and sighed. "I just felt like I shouldn't so, I didn't." She answered honestly and looked up into green eyes that she had found rather comforting.
"Well...I'm doing this because I've felt like I've known you longer and call me….insolent or foolish, but….it seems like the right thing to do." Emma responded and slowly set the guitar down before picking up a picnic basket and smiled before laying out a blanket she packed from her room and unfolded it and laid it across the ground before taking her boots off and stepping onto the blanket and smiled. "So shall we eat and talk, or are you going to continue sitting there looking like you're posing for a portrait." Emma grinned.
"Why are you going to paint me?"
"Mmn I don't think I can quite capture your beauty to do the portrait justice."
At those words, Regina flushed a light pink and cleared her throat and Emma grinned goofily as she chuckled a bit before uncorking the wine and began to pour into two crystal goblets.
"You're one for words my dear." Regina cracked out before sliding her heels off and sitting right beside Emma, the blonde noticing that the shoes were almost a pure diamond with sapphire heels and she found some sort of hilarious irony that she was the prince in her nearly manly outfit and Regina was Cinderella. Oh how Henry would have a hay day.
"So.…" Regina began and took the goblet offered to her, sipping softly. "What is your son's name?" She asked and hummed a bit.
"Henry.…Henry Daniel Swan." Emma coughed a bit and smiled a bit as she almost gave Regina's last name and realized that would be quite stupid of her to do.
Regina's eyebrow's rose a bit. "So you and this woman are married?"
Emma shook her head and swirled the wine in her goblet. "No she just decided to keep my last name for him so he would have a piece of me." Emma nodded a bit while sipping the wine while humming a bit.
"That's.…a wonderful name though." Regina nodded as she pressed her hand to her stomach with a sad expression.
"What's wrong?" Emma asked while turning to the brunette, her eyes wandering down to where her hand was placed.
"Nothing-I just….I can't have children and that name is just a really good name for a boy. I'm sure he's a good child." She said with an expression with a million emotions. "For a girl however…I've always been partial to… Liliana… I always thought it was beautiful." She smiled a bit while looking to the blonde.
"I think that's a beautiful name My Queen." She said with a small smile and finished her goblet of wine while humming a bit. "You know I never thought I'd make a good mother, I never really had parent's so I used to think how can someone be a good parent when they themselves never saw one." She said a bit sadly.
"But I'm sure you are a pretty ok mother." Regina said with a small smile and hummed.
"I like to think I am." Emma chuckled a bit. "But you know I'm in a way happy I gave him up, because he was raised with such a wonderful mother that in a way I'm jealous of. But, isn't that good?" Emma hummed a bit.
"I remember you said you were eighteen when you had him…. You know when I first fell pregnant I was sixteen or seventeen…" She hummed a bit. "I miscarried though around five months in and that happened a couple times and when my mother said she wanted me to come to term and have a son I…I drank a potion that would make my womb barren…I hadn't realized though that…at the time I was around four months pregnant and that pain I felt was terrible…my mother said I would have carried to term and when I looked at his little body I just…I threw her out and I had never forgiven myself and neither did the King as he had wanted a son but…that is a story best left unsaid when it came to him." She showed a slight smile while finishing the rest of her wine.
Emma looked down at her as she felt every part of her wish that she could hug the queen and pull her close. "I'm sorry…that must have been so terribly hard…" She said softly and then thought of how that child would have been conceived and felt herself become almost sick.
"I could have even got past who the father was because that child would have been a part of me and maybe saved me from the hurt and loneliness, but it was never meant to be." She said softly and sighed a bit before breaking off another piece of bread.
"There's a reason for all things My queen and you know….when you've fallen completely down, the only place left to go is up. So let me help you up." She cracked a side smile.
"What are you, my prince charming?" She rolled her eyes and couldn't help but smile a bit as she looked into those green eyes and felt herself grow into some sort of peace.
Emma couldn't help but hold back the fitful laughter that threatened to spill past her lips. It was humorous at the irony, she was a Charming after all but never once had she thought to be like her dad. "Well then that makes you my princess?" She grinned back and stood up before bowing and offering her hand out. "So shall we dance into the moonlight?" Emma grinned and Regina poured one half glass of wine before taking another swig of it , almost finishing it before standing and holding the woman's hand.
"I suppose." She took the slightly calloused larger hand and felt herself being pulled up. Emma was almost knocked down as she felt the woman pressed flush into her upon pulling her up.
They locked eyes as they looked into eachother's eyes. "Hi…" Emma said with a sheepish smile that reminded her of the time she first saw Regina in the body hugging gray dress and was honestly slightly smitten by her beauty and here she was seeing the woman who was still so young and alone.
"Hi there dear." Regina smiled a bit before looking up into Emma's eyes, one arm wrapping around the girls shoulders before the other held the woman's hand. Emma then wrapped her free arm around Regina's waist, they were so close that the two would be able to hold a thin sheet of paper between them without falling; their hearts beating nearly in sync and their breath's intermingling one with the other. They moved off the blanket, shoeless feet pressed against the cool stone slabs as they began to slowly dance to the sounds of the nightlife around them.
Emma smiled as they slowly moved in a slow waltz, their eyes meeting and Emma swore that the universe was held in those beautiful brown eyes. Captivating, breath taking, ethereal eyes that hold a million stories, a million whispered pleas, a million cries, and a million laughs. She felt her heart lunge up into her throat as she couldn't find the right words to say, it was like if either one of them spoke it would shatter this moment.
Their bodies moved in a voiceless tune, a tune that their hearts had known for as long as time itself. "I've never been asked to dance before." Regina confessed as she smiled softly, her eyes breaking contact as she rested her head against the blondes shoulder.
"Is that so? I thought queens danced at balls." She whispered against the brunettes ear, earning a slight shudder.
"Mmn yet never had I been asked. My husband always danced with his darling daughter and I was left alone at most ball's." She hummed a bit while her body pressed even tighter to the woman. "Maleficent and I never attended events together really, if we do we usually just stay there because if I reveal my fancies then bad things could happen and she's not…out if that makes sense. A dragon has a duty to continue their lineage and that doesn't mean me." Regina said softly as she pressed her lips together tightly.
"So is that what she is doing?" Emma asked softly.
"Well even if she does the father never sticks around in their kind…it's an arrangement and that's all." Regina answered with a hint of sadness, sounding as if she's trying to convince herself.
"So tell me…" Emma whispered as she continued dancing slowly with the queen. "Have you ever been in love and loved in return?"
"Once, but it was short lived and innocent so the fact of it being a true love is uncertain…but a first love for sure." Regina nodded slowly as she slowly looked up into Emma's eyes. "Like your childs father except mine died in front of me…" She whispered and sighed softly.
"I'm sorry." Emma said softly. "Do you want to talk about it?"
"I- I don't really mention it since it's a darker time in my life that perhaps started me on this path….only showing how weak hearted I am and foolish…" Regina with her brows knitted together.
"Or it's because your heart is pure, soft, and you have a loving heart that does care deeply and that is stronger than having a careless heart." Emma smiled a bit.
"I was to be wed to Leopold…" She started and looked up at Emma, seeking a sort of comfort. "I met with Daniel that night to ask him if he loved me enough to marry me and he hesitated but agreed and we said we were going to run far from my mother, the king, the kingdom and live in a small farm house and live simply which was ok with me." She smiled tearfully and swallowed down the pain she had felt. "Snow saw us…she asked why I was betraying my father and I was supposed to be her mother and I tried to explain how wonderful love is and how it shouldn't be taken lightly and that this boy beside me was the one I truly love. She said she understood and should tell her father and my mother and I said that was a terrible idea. She was young at the time and ignorant to saying no to a king and my mother, but she promised she wouldn't tell them and the night I was supposed to run away…my mother came and asked what was happening. She made it seem like she was ok with it and right when I was about to leave, Daniel following she turned and ripped his heart out and….she crushed it right in front of me.. I watched the life in his eyes leave as he said he loved me and I felt utterly lost after that." Regina whispered and looked down and pressed her eyes into Emma's shoulder, taking slow even breaths.
"I married Leopold that next day and found….many hurtful things about marrying a king who was not completely over his deceased wife as well as finding out that my mother tried to marry him at one point….and ….I felt so wrong as he called out every name but my own….and….was far from gentle…" Regina choked out, her tears falling heavily at this point; Emma's arms tightly held onto Regina and felt her heart ache heavily. "I couldn't say no…but even then I still asked him to please not and it fell on his drunken deaf ears….he's older than my father for gods sake…but no one cared….only did I receive a look of pity from my chamber maids who tended to me after he was done and left." Regina gripped tightly onto the clothing of Emma's shirt with the hand that wrapped around her neck and Emma held the woman up, stilling their dance as she pressed her lips comfortingly into the womans crown of her head.
"I'm so sorry my Queen."
"Regina.…"
"What?" Emma asked and opened her eyes slowly.
"Please...call me Regina….You know far more than a mere subject…..but just call me this when it just us I ask of you." Regina whispered as Emma swayed them soothingly, Regina nestled into the woman's neck and found a comfort in her musky scent. "How you've opened me up to you I question immensely, but perhaps you are my prince." Regina cracked a light joke before looking up at Emma with tear filled eyes. Emma slowly pulled back and gently rubbed the tears from under the womans beautiful eyes.
"Perhaps I am, but for now how about we eat and enjoy the night as it is still young." Emma grinned as she then picked Regina up with ease, thanks to her rigorous physical training, she was quite strong and it only helped that Regina was quite petite. She brought her down with her on the blanket and plated their slightly cold food and smiled childishly at the woman.
The two ate in a comfortable silence, occasionally making small talk about their likes and dislikes, just trying to make the conversations as light as possible given the previous heavy topic they just ended. As three bottles of wine lay empty and full stomachs filled them completely in a comfortable slightly tired stupor. The two women laid upon the blanket and gazed up at the stars.
"You know…" Emma slurred out a bit while laying under both her hands and Regina bunched up the cape Emma gave her under her head in a makeshift pillow.
"Hmm?" Regina hummed while looking up at the same stars.
"Stars are so comforting…their unchanging and always the same….when I was young I wanted to be like those and just stable and shine…I think I'm beginning to do that." Emma laughed lightly, and covered her mouth a bit as she laughed.
"Is that so?" Regina looked over at the beautiful blonde beside her and scooted a bit closer.
"I want to be the light in that darkness of yours and give you hope." Emma drunkingly admitted. "Damn that's cheesy as hell." Emma giggled and smacked her forehead as Regina giggled girlishly.
"It is my dear." She admitted and tapped the girls nose.
"But I will do it, I vow Regina to be your star in the night." Emma grinned and as she turned her head, she accidentally brushed her nose against Regina's and all of a sudden she was breathless.
Whether it be the alcohol or their emotions, neither were sure but as she couldn't hold back anymore. Regina cupped the blondes cheek and closed her eyes.
"I'll hold you to that Em-ma." She whispered huskily and gently pressed her lips to Emma's and it was then that they both felt a sort of electricity jolt through them and little did they know what exactly happened at that very moment.