Because I love you
By:IcedragonslayerEmi791
Chapter 5: a time for tears
A/N: Thank you to those who have follows and reviewed, Lets Fly my Fairies!
~~~~~~~~Lisanna~~~~~~~~
I have been working with Bickslow for about two weeks, I was no closer to solving this case than a dog trying to find a bone on the Northside were the richy fucks lived. But after I had drunk myself stupid at the Snake pit with my good friend Kinana that I had a plan. Kinana was gonna admit herself as a patient there to try to get dirt from the inside. Her only concern was her daughter Firelily, However Kinana had a awesome boyfriend. Erik had agreed to take care of her till Kinana got back. It was because he had grown up in the same carnival till he was nine when he ran away, life didn't get much better for him his foster father Brain had been just as abusive to him, it had closed him off to everyone but Kinana she was the only who could reach Erik, when he was 17 and she was 16 she ended up pregnant with Firelily, it clamed him and while he still does not like people he is not as angry anymore. He was doing this because he like the rest of knew Bickslow had to be innocent, he had known Bickslow as a kid and knew there was not a crazy bone in his body. I had left that night with a plan and Kinana would get the job for the Celestial Star News she wanted. Kinana was studying journalism, exposing Fairy Hills would get her the job that was for sure.
But today was a new day and I was getting ready to go back to Fairy Hell that's what I had begun calling it with a massive hangover, Freed and I were both trying our best to keep Bickslow under wraps. Lately he has been getting the shitty end of the stick, he got in a fight and got canned. The fight was pointless too, over food. Masturbating Charlie had taken Bickslow's whole tray and Bickslow was not happy about it so he bit Charlie, It took Freed sticking a pen behind his ear to get him to let go, The bite was bad too, Bickslow had broken skin and Charlie had to have stiches. For that he was canned and thrown in the hole. Bickslow didn't care he had said " Oh so I get to play by myself?" I couldn't help but think that maybe it was my fault he was fighting back again but Freed said don't blame myself, that Bickslow had always been the one to fight back when it came to food. I sigh and walk out to my car, I had been saving for six weeks to buy one, it was a 91 Toyota Carola. It was a pos but it was a car. Once Elfman was in we head to work. Elfman didn't even know the plan, it was only between Kinana, Erik and myself. I pull in to the gate and sigh again as I put the car in park, today was gonna be a good day, it think to my self, maybe just maybe he would finally talk to me, tell me what happened, oh mavis I hoped so. I shut the car off put my Flyleaf hoodie on and head inside. It was still early so it was cold inside. By noon I would be roasting and need to take it off to find a place around my waist. I look down at what once was a white hoodie that now had a blood spot on it from that fight, I was the only one Freed trusted to lead Bickslow back to his cell to cool off, once I had him in there he decided he was gonna be extra nice and spit blood at Freed, while most of it ended up on Freed I got some too all over my hoodie. I didn't care though.
I head in and clock in with Freed, That was one relationship that had changed too, Freed has become my friend instead of just my boss, often letting me leave if I needed to or just leaving me alone with Bickslow for as long as I needed. While he didn't talk much to anyone else, Bickslow talked to me. I had learned a great deal about him, like he used to skateboard, tight rope walk, parkor and some gymnastics from growing up the way he did, he loved music, loved horror movies. But he had no fear that I knew about, he could speak Romanian as well as Boscon, Math was his best subject in school and he had wanted to be a mechanic. I snuck my bass in one time and played for him he watched me the whole time, as I played beyond the realms of death by Judas priest for him after he said that was how he was feeling. I chuckled when he said that but as he watched me play his whole demnor changed it was like a little kid watching their first concert. But there was the side nobody knew about, inside he's a mess, scared and at this point he maybe crazy but I didn't care, I consider him my friend. Once Freed gives me the all clear I head into the day room and there he was in the window spacing out again, I hear Braham's lullaby in the background playing at least they had a new song to loop. I remember the song Bickslow came up with to this one " Go to Sleep, Go to sleep little Pshyco, Sister Twaty gonna make it all better now, go to sleep little pshyco go to sleep, go to sleep and drool, go to sleep", when he had sang that one I about died of laughter. I walk over and put my hand on his shoulder, he swings around with his cuffed wrists like he was gonna hit me, " Oh its you" he says, " Yeah it's me" I tell him, " Don't touch me" he says. I had forgotten that, Bickslow didn't like to be touched. He had come to associate someone touching him with pain or abuse. " Im sorry Bickslow" I tell him , he rolls his eyes and gets out of his window, I lead him to the room were we talk most of the time, he says nothing to me, I sigh and wait till he says something " Hows things Kitten?" He asks, " Good" I tell him. " Cool," He says. I had to tell him " So do you remember a kid named Erik?" I ask him. " Yeah" he says " I'm friends with his girlfriend, we have come up with a plan to get you out of here" I tell him, I watch him shake and than realize he was laughing, " Get me out? Only way outta Fairy hills is in a body bag Kitten" He says as he stares at the wall. " Gray got out" I tell him " please he was in the I'm a whiny bitch and tried to be a pussy side, not the im a Psycho and need to be locked up side" He says. " we both know that's not true" I tell him, he sighs before he shrugs his shoulders in agreence. " So are you ever gonna tell me your side" I ask, " Nag, Nag, Nag" he says and I laugh. This was the side I loved of him, Wait loved? " Fine, toss me a cigarette" he says, I didn't smoke but started keeping a pack on me for him. I toss him one and he stumbles to catch it, it than light it for him and he takes a drag
I hit record " It was May 25th my friend Laxus and I were outside we had just got done smoking a blunt, just a couple of kids goofing off really, I was showing him how to skate board and he was bombing, his size preventing him…. I looked down at my old flip phone it was five o clock I had to be home by seven to get the Circus ready for opening night, I had to fix the Gravatron, that damn ride never worked….I got on my board after saying by to Laxus that id see him later to watch him puke his brains out. I stopped at the Magmart on my way there got me a chili dog, a Faygo and a pack of Cigarettes. I hoped back on my board after I ate, stuffing my soda in my back pack, I headed home and….. when I got to to the dirt road I remember it was Funny considering all things,…. When I got to the sign I saw Alashar hanging upside down….. he had no head….. I dropped my board and ran in trying to find my Mama, Bugsy the midget and Stretch the stilt man both were dead…. Some one had stuck Bugsy on a stilt rotisserie style….. everyone in the big top had been cut open and de-de-decapataited….. the lions and tigers…. Were eating the remains… I puked by the liger's cage… I had to jump back as it took a swipe at me…. I just wanted to find my Mama….. I stopped at the Vardo were I grew up and and the door had been ripped off its hinges…. There were drag marks….. like she had tried to hide…. I called her and she didn't answer…..i kept looking . I heard the sirens in the distance….. I found her under the Gravatron….she had been raped and sodomized… as well as decapitated…. I picked up her body and cried….. next thing I know the cops were surroding me telling me to get on the ground ….. I-I-I dropped her and ran….. I ran to Laxus's using the roofs of buildings and trees…..i jumped to the roof of his house and felt something hit me… I rolled off the house and broke my leg….. the bone was sticking out….. I was arrested for murder in the first degree…. Laxus and Makarov tried to say I was innocent… I was admitted to Fairy hills till I was fit enough to stand trail….. a trail that never came" he said, he had tears running down his face. I felt something wet on my face I wiped my cheek it was tears. " Why the fuck are you crying?" he asked…. "I'm sorry Bickslow" I tell him, " Why the fuck are you Sorry? Your acting like you're the one who it happened to, guess what Lisanna it didn't ok? So stop fucking crying!" He spat at me…. I say nothing and lean in to him I had no idea what had come over me, but I pressed my lips to his, they were dry and cracked, I could taste the salt from the tears but there was also the taste of rot from him not brushing his teeth or a bad tooth. When I pull away he is glaring at me again like I had killed him " and now your kissing me? Fuck you're a dumb bitch" he says. I choke back my own tears as I text my brother to come get him, Elfman comes and I run out the door, I run past Freed who says nothing seeing my tears, I didn't want to deal with Freed right now I already knew what he was gonna say and I didn't have an answer for him.
My compulsive nature had just got the best of me and all I wanted was a stiff drink to drown out everything that had just happened. I run out the door and get in my car putting in gear turning on Ave Maria by Beyonce, it was proboly the worst song right now but I was so confused, I drove till I got to the Snake pit. I put my car in park and turn it off locking the doors. Could never be to careful in this neighborhood. I run inside and sit at the bar. Erik is the one who sees me first " Damn what got your panties in a twist" he says seeing me, " Just give me a beer" I tell him. " At this point I think you need something stronger than a beer Lisanna" he says. I wipe my tears away and look at him " Fine boiler maker" I tell him, Erik looks at me like I was crazy but makes it anyways, Erik was never one to pry but today was not my day " What has got you all worked up I'm making you a boiler maker" he says as he drops a shot of jack in the mug. I say nothing as I slam it back in one shot, I slam the mug down and tap on the bar, Erik looks at me with his one eye, he wasn't asking now he was demanding. In all the years I had been friends with Kinana I had learned he was pretty preceptive. " Id rather tell Kin" I tell him. " Well she's at the house dealing with Firelily" he says, I sigh and tell him " He told me his story and I kissed him", Erik whistles before he answers back "Well how did he respond" He asks. " He called me a dumb bitch" I tell him as I take a shot of Jack he sat in front of me, I watch as he takes a shot himself before he says " you probably caught him off guard, Mavis knows it the last thing he was expecting" he says, I take another shot and go to pay Erik before he stops me " Its on the house, Go talk to him" He says, I gulp and reach across the bar hugging him, Erik tenses up but returns the hug none the less, Erik like Bickslow didn't like to be touched, but over time and Kinana's help he got over it, he was not overly affectionate but he didn't push people away anymore. " Thanks Cobra" I tell him, " Welcome Lisanna" He tells me as I run out the door, I get in my car and head back to Fairy Hills.
When I get Back to Fairy hills its right around the time they shuffle them to roll out bread, cook or wash dishes. I walk past Evergreen and nod. Id tell her my plan later but right now I had to find Bickslow. I find him pulling a pan out of the oven, " Hey Bickslow, Can we talk? " I ask him, " About what" he asks " About what happened?" I ask him, he looks at me with those crimson eyes of his. " nothing to talk about, " He says as he slides the pan to a girl named Aliza who was in Fairy hills for killing her husband. " Please talk to me" I say to him, he sighs and grabs my wrist leading me off somewhere to the back of the kitchen after he told Strangler Sam to cover for him, " Look Lisanna it happened, what do you want me to say I liked it? Because I did but your just wasting your time ok? , im stuck here for life, im not getting out anytime soon, your wasting your time, find someone else, ok?" He says his eyes said it all he knew I was trying to help him, he knew why I had kissed him but he couldn't bring himself to go there. As much as he wanted it. He felt like it was a fantasy a dream, something to torture him. He lets me go and walks off, I wanted to tell him wait that I had a plan but my brain wouldn't form the words. I feel tears sting my eyes again and I didn't know what to do. I walk out of the kitchen drying my tears to go help Freed with getting everyone ready for dinner. holding back tears the whole time, my head had heard his words but my heart was not letting go….it was a time for tears.
Big Fan: It brings chills to me and im the one writing it!