The amber drink in her hand glistened in the light through the pattern of the tumbler like crystals and Lucy leaned back into the soft couch, letting out a soft sigh before downing the rest of the bourbon.
"You're still holding up?" Olivia sank down next to her and filled the glass again. Lucy lazily looked over to her and saw the fourth Martini in the other girl's grasp.
"All good," Lucy answered as she straightened her back. "I don't have to get back home, that makes it a little easier."
Olivia grinned. "You can finally drink again. The past few months I was wondering whether you've actually converted to being a good girl now. That's not like you."
"I suppose I tried and failed," Lucy gave her a dry grin. "Can't deny my personality."
"How are you doing otherwise? Now that you found back to your real self?" Olivia calmly asked. "Everything with your parents?"
Lucy only held up the half-emptied glass of bourbon, a gesture that had become second nature in the two weeks since the funeral and Olivia nodded. "It's a way to deal with it. You got the emancipation down? That's what Carter got two years ago, after the accident, remember?"
"Actually, no," Lucy sighed, turning her red rimmed eyes, marked by the alcohol, to the brunette. "It was on the table but we went with adoption."
She grinned as Olivia's eyes grew slightly. For the young woman who never showed any sign of surprise because everything was under her control, that was a big deal.
"You really feel indebted to these people, otherwise you wouldn't have turned down the chance to be able to do whatever the hell you want - and your entire trust fund. Come on, you would've made Forbes pretty much immediately – under 20s even!"
Lucy shrugged her shoulders, too intoxicated to feel much. "I suppose so."
Olivia knew she wouldn't get anything else out of the other girl so she motioned for the rest of her minions to join them on the couch.
The night passed quickly. Lucy never felt happy at any point but she wasn't expecting that anymore. Her parents' death hit her harder than expected and she originally thought being at the tower would help but it didn't. Not even her grandmother dying had been this bad and the only reason she could think of was that her grandma has passed away in her sleep, whereas her parents were killed - in an assassination. After four glasses of Bourbon she didn't care anymore though and decided that was the reason.
###
"You're still alive?" Olivia turned from the brunch assortment as Lucy stepped out the bath into the living room.
"Barely," Lucy sighed as she dropped on the sofa next to Jane and grabbed a croissant.
Heather giggled slightly. "We thought we'd lost you during Never Have I Ever… I can't believe you and Harry Osborne…"
"I know I was drunk but I distinctly remember telling you that we'll never talk about that again," Lucy interrupted the other girl who shut her mouth but still sported a grin.
The girls enjoyed the massive breakfast with gallons of coffee and Lucy was once more amazed at how Olivia managed to throw the best social events – her mother taught her well.
When brunch was done and their hangover somewhat cured, they said their goodbyes and left the penthouse to get to their respective homes.
Lucy navigated her Audi into the garage at the tower before taking the elevator up to her own floor. When she stepped out, Nat was just walking into the living room. Catching a glimpse of Lucy, she stopped and waited for the girl to walk up to her.
"How was the sleepover?"
Nat recognized the distinct bloodshot eyes immediately and she wasn't surprised, but she kept smiling.
"It was fun," Lucy smiled politely but she was pretty sure she couldn't fool Natasha - she was a spy and she knew her too well. She hoped her mentor would just assume she was in so much grief still that she couldn't have fun.
Nat regarded her calmly for a moment, but then apparently decided not to pursue the topic any further. Lucy let out a slow breath, relieved that she avoided a confrontation again. This grief bit really helped get away with the "sleepovers" that occurred more and more recently since the funeral. Before Lucy could disappear in her room, Nat called after her.
"We're driving upstate tomorrow morning, 9am."
Her mentor walked away before Lucy could ask why but it was probably just an irregular Avengers meeting.
###
"I told you we'd get here first."
Lucy pulled up to the gates of the base before the guard recognized her badge and opened them.
"Yes… but at what cost?" Wanda pulled a face. "The way you took those turns was suicidal."
"Oh, please, it was fun," Peter called from the back. "Like a roller coaster."
"Without security," Wanda scowled which made Lucy look at her.
"You're gonna complain to Steve? Please don't, I'm not really in the mood for a lecture."
Wanda gave her an incredulous look. "Do you think I'm dumb? Of course I won't. I still rather drive in your kamikaze vehicle than with the old people."
"Or you could get your driver's license," Peter suggested from behind.
"You're one to talk! You couldn't even be bothered to turn up for the test."
Peter grinned at the witch's retort. "I'm faster swinging around."
"Until someone cuts the strings," Lucy suggested ominously as she turned off the engine.
The spider didn't have time to ponder her words as Lucy ushered them inside to the living room where Hill was already waiting.
"You got here early!" She smiled knowingly. "Do I wanna know what your driving style is like?"
Wanda sighed audibly and Lucy grinned at the older woman. "Learned from Tony, learned from the best."
"Debatable!" the witch called and everyone started laughing.
Peter gave Hill his puppy dog look which worked with everyone except Shield agents, something Lucy thought was regrettable when dealing with Nat – not that they didn't try.
"Why did we come up here today anyway? No one told us anything."
Hill smiled knowingly but decided that they should be privy to some information.
"We've called an Avengers meeting. I can't tell you what it's about exactly but it's probably gonna result in a short mission. Nothing we can't handle in a day."
Lucy and Wanda gave each other a long look. They didn't have time to pry out any more because the rest of the family arrived at that point as well.
Nat raised an eyebrow when she saw Lucy who smiled back angelically and Tony only grinned.
"I did teach her to drive."
"Yes and I'm starting to regret having allowed that," Natasha scowled with Happy enthusiastically nodding behind her.
"I feel like you need a few more lessons with me on driving like a normal person," he said.
Lucy grinned. "But I'm not a normal person, am I?"
"And here goes the ego," Sam shook his head before turning to Hill. "Conference room?"
The agent nodded and the adults made their way towards the hallway while leaving the kids behind in the living room.
They crashed on the sofas but Lucy couldn't shake the feeling that she had about this meeting.
Suddenly, she stood up, startling Peter. "Let's go see what this assembly is about."
Wanda gave her a confused look. "How?"
"I thought we could try and hack into the security footage."
"Are you mental?" The witch's mouth stood open but Peter's eyes grew in excitement.
"Let's do it!"
Wanda sighed. "Please think about this again."
Lucy waited a second. "Just did – let's do it."
Even though the other girl wasn't completely on board with the plan, she was bored enough to join them in Lucy's room.
As the three crashed on her bed, Lucy pulled her laptop on her knees and Peter bent over so he could see.
"Remember to disable J.A.R.V.I.S. first –"
"I'm not stupid, spiderling," Lucy grumbled as she got on Tony's private server level and tipped a few familiar commands. "Try it."
Wanda sighed but called out. "J.A.R.V.I.S?"
No response.
"Great!" Peter beamed. "You've gotta teach me how to do that."
"You can figure that out for yourself. It's not Hemmingway analysis," Lucy mumbled, too absorbed in trying to get into Fury's paranoid mind.
"There we are." She leaned back after a few minutes of hectic typing and let the live stream of the security camera roll. Thankfully, the entire compound was equipped with the best technology so even the security footage looked like a made-for-TV movie, rather than grey pixels on a black background.
"I think a quick response is the best option. Everyone joins in at once and we use the element of surprise. This shouldn't be too dangerous or lengthy."
As Fury finished talking, he stopped at the head of the conference table and the three kids excitedly looked at each other. So the team was going on a mission.
"We have Sam, Rhodey and Clint as the fallback team, in case it takes longer than a day and we need to establish camp down there."
Hill concluded the presentation and the three men nodded in approval and Lucy just wanted her to keep talking. They were too late to catch the beginning of the conversation and they still didn't know the destination.
Now Steve sighed.
"I know a Saturday excursion to South America wasn't planned, but I agree that a swift response is the best solution. We need to be able to deliver Lucy some good news, if we can't give her peace of mind."
Lucy heard the others' breath stock and felt her own hitch as well. So, this was about her parents like she'd suspected! But knowing the adults they wouldn't let her go with so she needed a different tactic. Before she could finish that thought though, a voice distracted her.
Meet at the Quinjet at 12pm.
As Fury finished, his eye quickly flew up to the camera and back down again in less than a second, but Lucy still felt like he'd looked directly through her. She didn't know whether the others saw it but it didn't deter her from finally finishing her line of thought.
"Get out of there, they're leaving," Wanda hissed, even though no one could hear them yet and Lucy retraced her steps with her thoughts still on board another train. She reactivated J.A.R.V.I.S. and the kids put on Netflix, not trying to scramble to the living room and risk being seen rushing out her room.
Lucy didn't concentrate on the show, in fact she lowered the volume slightly and got the others' attention.
"I have an idea."
Wanda moaned. "Please don't."
Lucy gave her an exasperated look and continued. "They said this is to do with my parents. I need to know what's going on but they'll never let us go officially."
Peter looked at her with curiosity but Wanda seemed like she'd much rather continue watching Brooklyn 99.
"We know which plane they're using. I say we sneak on the Quinjet and take part in the fighting."
"That's the stupidest idea you ever had," Wanda immediately responded in a serious tone, keeping eye contact with Lucy.
"Come on, Wanda!" Peter nudged the young witch. "I know you're bored too."
"But not suicidal." She was still dead-serious. "You cannot do this."
Lucy gave her a long look and realized the redhead wouldn't be convinced, so she just smiled and nodded. "Alright, it is a dumb idea. Let's watch."
Peter gave her a confused glance but Lucy ignored him and Wanda seemed happy they finally listened to her and the three turned back to the show.
A few minutes later they were interrupted again, this time by Natasha who asked them to come downstairs. The kids, pretty good at playing dumb, pretended they didn't know what this was about and scrambled up. Wanda was first through the door and when she'd left the room, Lucy held Peter back slightly.
"We're going."
"What?" The spider turned to her questioning.
"We're sneaking on the Quinjet but we can't tell Wanda cause she'll tell Steve. You saw how serious she was."
Peter nodded and his eyes grew in excitement. "We'll tell her we're doing lab work."
Lucy grinned at his quick thinking and the two quickly made to catch up with the witch.
When the team told the kids that they were leaving for the mission the same day the trio showcased their acting abilities once again and as they all got up, Lucy and Peter made their way towards the lab.
Dressed in their suits, they snuck to the Quinjet via the backdoors. The team was still outside sorting through equipment so the two easily climbed into the baggage area behind some boxes. As they heard the others stashed their bags only feet away from their hiding place, Peter and Lucy held their breaths. Once they heard the muffled voices only from the front of the plane and the bridge close, the two smiled at each other. Lucy handed him a piece of gum to minimize the pressurizing effects as the plane started and vertically ascended.
The flight was pretty calm and the silence that Lucy and Peter had to keep didn't help them stay awake so they finally gave in and closed their eyes. They opened them again when they heard an explosion and realized they'd landed and the fighting had already started. Excited, both got out of their hiding place and made their way towards the battleground. Peter started taking off towards what seemed like an abandoned building and Lucy went the other way where she could make out some henchmen around a bunker. With a flick of her arm, she shot five darts in quick succession out of her glove and managed to hit four of the bad guys. This was going well, she thought and satisfied, went on further down the path. Another deafening explosion in front of her sent her tumbling back however and it took a few moments before the dust had settled enough for her to see again.
"Oh, I better be dreaming and you're not actually here," a voice behind Lucy had her spin around. Sam was eyeing her sternly and before Lucy could respond, he dragged her back a few paces, just in time to avoid being hit by another blast.
"I'm helping!" Lucy said as soon as she found her balance again.
Sam shook his head in disbelief. "You're not. You're not part of this mission and you have no idea what we're doing." At Lucy's defiant face, he took her shoulders and looked at her intently. "You get back to the jet right now and I'll consider telling Nat that you never got off."
Lucy was about to give an angry response but another blow was heard and the entire area was covered in thick dust again. When it settled, Sam was gone and suddenly panic spread in Lucy's chest.
"Sam? Sam!" she yelled as she made her way back from where she'd come from but apparently she'd lost orientation and couldn't see the jet anymore. Hectically, she turned in circles, trying to remember where she'd gotten off but the building from earlier had disappeared. The heat wasn't helping either and the ground started flickering in the sweltering Peruvian weather.
With another hit close to her, Lucy was stumbling and almost fell but was caught by a mechanic grip and lifted in the air, just in time as the explosive sent a blast through where she'd been standing. Lucy twisted her head to see the silver suit and she could feel Rhodey's disapproval through the mask.
He dropped her at the entrance to the Quinjet, pushed her in straightaway and before Lucy could orientate herself, the hatch closed and the jet lifted off the ground.
"Are you okay? Are you hurt anywhere?"
When she heard Natasha's voice right next to her, Lucy was relieved but her heart also immediately dropped. She nodded without looking into her mentor's eyes and took a trembling breath. Nat's hands on her shoulders steadied her and Lucy couldn't stop the tears from forming in her eyes. She still couldn't bring herself to look up but suddenly she felt two arms around her, embracing her in a tight hug. The adrenaline left her at once and Lucy clung onto Nat and started sobbing into her shoulder. The hand stroking up and down her back couldn't console her, so Natasha started humming a Russian lullaby and finally Lucy's breathing normalized.
Nat was worried, scared, furious and panicked. She usually didn't have many feelings but Lucy managed to send her over the emotional edge time and time again. It wasn't scaring her – she'd been living with the Avengers for years and with Clint even longer - but she was still getting used to connecting with someone else emotionally to the extent it happened with Lucy. While she was angry and completely astounded at the girl's ideas, the relief was more prevalent after the worry fell off that had weight on her since Sam notified her that Lucy was there in the fighting. Holding the girl in her arms, she tightened her embrace again to reassure herself that Lucy was safe and unharmed.
Once Lucy stopped sobbing, the two pulled apart and the disappointment and anger Natasha felt at her actions took over. Lucy looked up at her and swallowed hard as she saw Nat's hard eyes that didn't reveal any of her emotions which was always a bad sign. Not that she needed any subtle hints – she knew she'd messed up badly. Natasha grabbed her shoulders and navigated her to the side of the plane before sitting her down next to Peter. Lucy hadn't realized while she was upset herself, but Tony didn't respond well to their impulsive decision and Natasha pulled him away harshly before he could get up further in Peter's face. Rhodey was sitting with the boy, calming him down, while Tony tried to keep it together. Lucy flinched at how scared he must've been and with his special worry about Peter, she knew why he'd responded so toughly. She sunk down next to Peter and Rhodey also placed a hand on her shoulder.
"It's going to be alright, both of you."
Lucy looked up at the man with worried and apologetic eyes and he returned a stern look.
"This was the stupidest decision you've made so far, but you know you'll get through this," Rhodey stroked their arms and with a few deep breaths, Lucy was able to nod and agree with him. Peter next to her had calmed as well but looked still quite shaken.
Peering over Rhodey's shoulder, Lucy could see Natasha talking intently to Tony, getting close up in his face and apparently that's what he'd needed because he seemed much calmer than before.
The atmosphere on the jet was subdued and Sam and Clint had hidden themselves in the cockpit, while Steve stood next to one of the small windows, completely ignoring the two kids. When suddenly Tony's phone rang, the loud ringing startled everyone. He pulled a face as he looked at the display and took a deep breath before answering it.
"Hey Pep," he said softly and Lucy felt as if an icy dagger went through her heart. She hadn't even realized that Pepper would be worried out of her mind at not being able to find Peter at the base.
"Yes, he's here. Oh no, please stop crying, Pep, he's not hurt, he's fine, they're both fine," Tony said softly. Lucy's eyes grew while Nat placed a hand on his shoulder.
"I didn't, Pep, of course, I didn't allow him to come!" Tony tried desperately to calm his fiancée down.
Nat seemed to realize that Tony wasn't handling this well so she took the phone from him and started talking softly to Pepper. She was successful and able to hang up not long after, having promised the other woman to return as quickly as possible to the base.
While Nat was still talking to Tony, Steve finally turned around and faced the kids sternly.
"I hope I don't have to tell you that this was a completely ill-advised and irresponsible decision," he addressed them in a curt tone and Lucy knew they were about to receive a serious dressing-down.
"You know exactly how this team works and how we choose missions and assignments. It was clear that you might be allowed on some and we were quite impressed with your skills and abilities when you have accompanied us." He directly looked at Lucy who had a hard time holding his gaze.
"But today you've shown a level of immaturity that we are not used to from you. You were not authorized, you didn't know what the mission objectives were and you weren't accounted for. I don't know what you were thinking but considering the severity of your mistakes, you mustn't have been thinking at all. As your commanding officer and personally, I'm gravely disappointed in your actions today." He gave them another long look before turning towards the cockpit and checking in with Clint and Sam.
Lucy didn't look at Peter but she could feel him slump next to him. She couldn't remember ever having felt worse. They'd upset their guardians, Steve was disappointed and more furious than ever before and she didn't even want to imagine what her grandma would have to say about this. That thought alone almost brought the tears back to her eyes so instead of dwelling on it, she closed them and leaned back against the wall of the jet. Not much later, Lucy felt someone crouch down next to her and she immediately recognized the smell that instantly calmed her. Leaning back into Natasha's arms and feeling her mentor's hand soothingly stroking her hair, she finally fell asleep.
###
Once back at the compound, Nat ordered Peter and Lucy to get to the living room and wait there. Not wanting to upset anyone any more than they already had, the two did as told without risking another look at any adult.
When they entered the family area, Pepper jumped up out of the seat she'd been occupying for the past hours and almost ran towards the kids.
"Oh, thank God, you're both alright!"
She engulfed them in a tight hug and Lucy was sure she could feel tears running down the older woman's face. The phone call had made her feel even guiltier than before but she almost couldn't stand this. When Pepper pulled away, Lucy forced herself to look back into her eyes.
"We're really sorry for worrying you," she started and Pepper sighed heavily.
"You scared the life out of me when I realized you weren't here anymore," she said with a shake of her head.
Peter sunk his head and Lucy couldn't hold the ginger's gaze anymore either. Pepper sighed once more and softly moved the kids towards the living room.
"I'm assuming Tony and Nat will want to have a discussion with you in here."
Lucy bit her lip and gave a soft nod in response. Before she left the room, Pepper turned and even managed a small smile.
"It's gonna be okay. This was a stupid, reckless decision, but we'll all get through this." With that she left the remorseful kids behind, awaiting the inevitable judgment.
They didn't have to wait for long. A few minutes later, the door opened and Tony and Natasha entered the room and closed the door behind them. Without saying a word, they walked over to the sofa next to the one Peter and Lucy occupied and sat down, eyeing the kids sternly.
Finally, Nat took a deep breath.
"I don't think we need to explain why we're here."
Even if Lucy had attempted to hold eye contact, the tone of her mentor's voice turned her stomach upside down and she couldn't bear the disappointed look anymore.
"Your decisions today were irresponsible, reckless and completely mindboggling. I don't know how in the world you came up with the idea of hiding in the Quinjet and taking part in a mission you weren't authorized to be on."
Nat paused and Lucy still didn't risk a look up. From the corner of her eyes she could see Peter slump more and more in his seat.
"I think Steve already talked to you about the implication this has for the team and as a commanding officer," Tony continued and his voice was heavy with disappointment and remnants of worry and anger.
"But you didn't just break official rules by going without authorization, you also broke our trust and rules by putting yourselves into direct danger for no reason whatsoever."
Lucy's heart sank with every word. It wasn't that she didn't know what she did wrong but hearing it laid out so plainly every time they needed to have a discussion felt like punches to her gut. She'd never had to deal with that in school. If they caught her breaking the rules, she'd have to serve detention but there was no discussion about the issue. Lucy had to admit that the tower approach – if harder to face and stomach - was definitely more efficient. She definitely tried to actively avoid trouble – most of the time. Lucy didn't understand her actions today at all.
"You are both grounded for two weeks," Natasha took over again. "On top of that, I don't think I need to mention that you've lost our trust and will not go on missions in the foreseeable future."
Lucy closed her eyes as she could already feel tears pricking at them. Natasha didn't allow any emotion in her voice which was always the worst sign. If she didn't sound disappointed anymore, she'd transcended the normal range of upset. Lucy didn't like admitting it, but she incurred that stage too often for her liking.
"We are incredibly disappointed in your actions." Peter slumped further down his seat at Tony's dressing-down and Lucy swallowed hard as she imagined the man's face.
"We're not even going to go into how you found out about the mission but I'm sure we have you to thank for that, Lucy. I checked J.A.R.V.I.S. and he has no recollection of that time in your room."
Lucy's eyes grew slightly and she swallowed hard but didn't dare look up. She didn't think Tony would investigate this far but apparently she had underestimated them.
"Hacking because you're bored or in order to break the rules is completely unacceptable and I thought you understood that. One more incident like this and we will restrict your internet access." Lucy didn't think she'd ever heard Nat sound this stern – and that said a lot.
Tony cleared his throat. "I think we can move onto the punishment then."
He and Nat got up and grabbed their respective kids. Lucy felt Natasha's strong grip on her shoulder and didn't resist as the redhead led her out the room and towards the stairs to their rooms. Inside Lucy's room, Nat sat on the girl's bed and stood Lucy in front of her. She cleared her throat but Lucy still found her shoes more interesting. She knew she was on thin ice and she was right - Nat wasn't having it at this point.
"Lucy." No response.
"Look at me when I'm talking to you. You didn't give Tony or me that respect while we were having the discussion downstairs but I've had enough of your insolence now."
Again, Natasha's words were a punch to the gut and Lucy's head jerked up. Bearing her mentor's gaze was hard but thinking about disappointing her further was worse.
"I really hope you understand how grave what you did today is." Natasha's eyes cut through Lucy and they were more serious than ever before. "This was a huge breach of our trust and I promise you that if this happens again, the consequences will be much more severe. It doesn't seem like it could get stricter, but believe me, we will go there. I sincerely hope for you that that won't materialize."
Lucy's breath stocked. She'd seen Nat angry before, she'd seen her disappointed and upset, but this was a new level. Understandably so. Lucy's shoulders slumped as she realized the extent of worry and agony Natasha must've gone through when she knew that Lucy was on the battlefield – unauthorized and without knowledge of the situation. Tears formed in her eyes already and the punishment hadn't even begun. Nat still had her eyes fixed on her and hid her emotions behind the hard expression. She didn't say anything but instead had her mouth pressed into a thin line. Lucy sighed but couldn't hide the quiver as she took in the breath.
"I'm sorry," she started and Nat's face didn't change at all. "I know it's not enough, especially since I seem to mess up worse and worse with each time, but I am. I'm sorry for worrying you, I'm sorry for breaking the rules and I'm sorry for putting myself in danger."
Nat sighed and some emotion returned to her eyes. Lucy wasn't sure whether she was happy about that – the disappointment and upset was clear to read in them.
"I'm glad you understand that. This is not about some small injury that could happen during a lab experiment or during training. This is a real mission and there's a much greater danger – even to your life. And I think you know that."
Lucy sunk her head but forced her eyes up again immediately and nodded, while maintaining eye contact with Nat's intense gaze. Her mentor took her hands into her own and pulled Lucy a little closer.
"There's always that element of this immense danger in any mission we go on, but we decide the ones for you based on how great it is. As a mother, it is difficult to see you go out there and putting your life on the line. I won't stop you from doing it, because I know how important it is to you and I understand that. But I need to be able to trust you and know how you'll do out there in order to rely on you as a teammate and not go crazy with worry."
Lucy was fighting a losing battle as more and more tears formed in her eyes and worry returned to Nat's eyes again. It only served to remind Lucy of what her guardian went through every time she went on a mission and even more today. She never thought she could feel worse than when she heard Pepper cry on the phone but apparently it was possible.
"Today, you risked your life more than usual because you had no idea of the objective, the plan or any engagement. I never want to have to go through this kind of anxiety again, so please, for my sake, do not ever do that again." Natasha sounded so sincere, Lucy felt another punch to the gut and nodded heartily.
Nat kept her eyes focused on Lucy for another moment before she took a deep breath. "I hope I made myself clear. None of this is going to happen again. Is that understood?"
"Yes, ma'am," Lucy answered immediately but the hoarseness of her voice was clearly noticeable.
With a curt nod, Natasha acknowledged her response and then sighed again. "Let's finish this then. Unbutton your pants and over my knee."
Lucy's stomach dropped at the familiar command but anything was better than looking into Nat's eyes for another moment so she quickly obeyed.
Natasha staled herself for the coming minutes. The worry she'd gone through when Sam told her that Lucy was there, on the battlefield, and refusing to return to the jet, was indescribable. She didn't know what the girl had done to her but the extent of emotion she experienced with her was new – the good and the bad. One thing she was certain about now was that she had to draw clear boundaries. This was the most reckless idea Lucy had come up with so far and Nat would go to great lengths to make sure it would stay that way. She was sure this was also to do with Lucy's grief over her parents' deaths but it only had been a few weeks. She wanted to give the girl some more time to comprehend it but that didn't mean that she would let her get away with her impulsively endangering her life or anyone else's. With a deep breath, she pulled down Lucy's pants and underwear in one fell swoop.
When the first smack hit her bottom, Lucy huffed and as Natasha settled into a steady rhythm, she started sniffling soon. The tears that had been building since their discussion soon began to fall freely as the sting in her backside kept building. Nat methodically covered the entire area and after the second round she stopped to pick up the ruler and continue with it. The sting was harsher than only Natasha's hand and Lucy buried her head in her arms. It wasn't as if she hadn't known this was going to happen. Deep down, she'd known from the moment she hid behind the boxes on the Quinjet, but the knowledge that she'd disappointed Nat so much that she felt like she had to use it hurt almost as much as the pain in her bottom. After another round with the ruler that had Lucy start squirming, Nat stopped.
"Why are we here?"
Lucy's stomach turned at the question. She hadn't expected to go over this again but it made sense. Nat was incredibly serious about this topic and Lucy understood, she really did. So, taking a deep breath, she tried to get her voice under control and started.
"Because I hacked into the cameras to eavesdrop on an Avengers meeting and I snuck onto a mission that I wasn't authorized to be on." It was useless to try and hide the tears in her voice.
"Correct." Natasha rested her hand on Lucy's back. "We've been over why this was absolutely unacceptable. On top of that, as soon as you got out of that plane, you were in official mission command, simply because you were out in the field. Yet you didn't obey Sam when he ordered you back to the plane, even though the first rule, in every mission you're on, authorized or not, is to obey any command immediately. I'm very upset at your behavior, especially seeing as the past missions have gone so well."
If she hadn't been placed over Nat's knee, Lucy would definitely slump further. She hadn't realized how far her insubordination had gone but she anticipated what Natasha said next, though she still felt rotten about it.
"You've lost a great deal of trust from all of us and we will think long and hard in the future whether to allow you on another mission. I think it's safe to say that you forfeited the right to any deployment for quite some time and it'll take time before you've earned our trust back."
Lucy had expected this but that didn't make the words sting any less. She knew Natasha was right but Lucy just wanted to sob and tell her she'd do better but she couldn't. Tears were still streaming down her face but she didn't seem to be able to fully let go.
Tipping the girl slightly forward, Natasha started aiming smacks at her sit spots where Lucy would feel the discipline any time she sat down in the next few days. It took longer than usual for the girl to be able to completely submit to the punishment but Nat wasn't surprised. She knew the girl built up a lot of guilt over the rules she'd broken and the worry she'd caused and Nat hoped that that would mean she wouldn't have to repeat this lesson ever.
Lucy felt like her backside was on fire and every measured stroke by her mentor added to the pain. Finally, she let out the first sob and went limb over Natasha's lap. The woman stopped the punishment and began stroking Lucy's back soothingly. It helped calm the girl down but not much. Once the sobs started, Lucy didn't seem to be able to control them anymore and just gave herself to the tears. Nat knew she wouldn't calm down over her knees, so she put Lucy's pants back in place and straightened the girl up before sitting her in her lap and embracing her in a tight hug.
"Shhhhh…" she whispered, placing her head on top of Lucy's, but it didn't help so she reverted to the cure that always worked and softly hummed a Russian lullaby. It was never easy disciplining Lucy and this was certainly the hardest spanking she'd ever given the girl. It had taken all her hard acquired self-discipline to continue with the punishment when she saw the girl cry before they'd even started. But reminding herself of the immense worry she'd felt and the effort it'd taken to calm Tony down on the jet reaffirmed her decision to make this memorable. Slowly, Lucy relaxed in her arms, the sobs quieted down to sniffles and the tears started to dry.
Natasha's arms around her made her feel more secure than she'd felt at any point since they'd gotten on the jet and Lucy was finally able to control herself. She couldn't believe Nat had actually forgiven her though, so she leaned back to look into her mentor's eyes.
"I'm so sorry… for disobeying, for putting my life in danger needlessly, for worrying you."
Nat smiled and stroked her hair calmly. "I know and you're punished and forgiven. I trust this won't happen again."
Lucy shook her head enthusiastically. "I promise it won't."
"Good," Natasha praised. "You'll also apologize to Sam specifically, since you disobeyed his order, and to Steve because he's your commanding officer."
Lucy gave a nod in response. "Yes, ma'am."
She sighed heavily. "I think I owe an apology to the entire team for making them worry and go after us when they should have been concentrating solely on the mission."
Natasha's features relaxed once more and the disappointed and stern sparkle in her eyes made way for a different one. Lucy had no idea how she managed to make Nat look proud after the stunt she just pulled but by now she'd given up trying to find reasons for why the family might not want or keep her. The adoption paperwork that was currently going through checks should've probably been enough warning.
"I'm very proud of you for recognizing that, ptichka," Nat said softly and pressed Lucy's head against her chest again.
Lucy took a deep breath and was finally able to let go of all the tension in her body as she listened to Nat's heartbeat.
###
Peter and Tony had apparently finished earlier, as when Lucy got to Steve's office door, Peter was just exiting. He threw her a pained but definitely happier look as she questioningly cocked her head. Lucy just sighed and caught the door as it closed and stuck her head into the office.
"Could I talk to you for a minute, please?"
Steve nodded seriously – he'd probably expected her to pay a visit – and gestured to the seat in front of his desk. Lucy took a deep breath and slowly sat down, wincing slightly as her backside painfully connected with the seat of the wooden chair. Steve managed to hide his soft smile at Lucy's face since he knew exactly what had happened.
"I wanted to apologize for my actions today," Lucy started, forcing herself to hold Steve's stern gaze. He really didn't want to make this easy on her and Lucy really couldn't blame him for it.
"I'm sorry for putting my life and Peter's into danger and completely going against everything the team stands for and everything I've ever been taught. I have no idea why I ever believed this was a good idea and I promise that this will never happen again – ever."
Lucy stocked to take a deep breath and tried to examine Steve's expression though it was to no avail. Like Nat, he wore an unreadable mask that didn't let any of his emotion become known to her so she just continued her apology.
"Everything I did was wrong, from hacking into the security cameras to hiding on the jet and disobeying every order I was given. I understand that I violated your trust and that of the entire team and I'm sorry I worried you."
She paused again, desperately hoping Steve would finally say something because she really didn't know what else she could say that would make him forgive her.
Thankfully, Steve sighed and leaned forward on his table, locking his hands.
"Thank you, Lucy. I'm glad you understand that what you did was completely unacceptable and I expect it won't ever happen again." His voice was as stern as Lucy ever heard and she slumped slightly in her chair, ignoring the stitch in her bottom. Looking back into Steve's eyes was even more painful anyway.
"I assume you had a discussion with Natasha already?"
Lucy nodded and swallowed hard.
"Then I trust she touched on the most important things. There has to be a certain level of trust within the team and as you realized, you destroyed that with your impulsive decision today."
Again, even though Lucy knew all of this already, his words felt like a punch to the gut when she heard it laid out so directly. She couldn't stand the look in his face anymore so she suck her head and chose to inspect her hands instead.
"I know you will earn it back because I refuse to believe today was anything else but an outlier fueled by some ignorant teenage rebelliousness."
The tears returned as the corners of Lucy's eyes started burning. She took a trembling breath. Steve's disappointment was hard to stomach and every time her actions were the reason for it, memories of her grandma haunted her. Not wanting to seem disrespectful again, Lucy lifted her head and forced herself to look back into Steve's eyes. To her surprise, some warmth had returned to them and Steve's expression wasn't as hard anymore.
"Apology accepted. You're an exceptionally bright young woman and you know better than this. Show us that you can do better."
"Yes, sir, I will. I promise," Lucy immediately responded, desperate to convince Steve of the truth of her words.
Apparently, it worked, as a small smile crept on the man's face. "I have no doubt you will."
Steve studied her face and Lucy knew he'd recognized the tears earlier; they weren't easy to hide. His intense gaze seemed to cut through her – she didn't know how he or Nat did it – and she knew he immediately knew why she was so distraught.
"You're right, Peggy would most definitely not be happy with your choices today."
Lucy swallowed hard at his clear words but Steve didn't look as stern as earlier. In fact, he still smiled at her.
"But I also know that she herself got into many reckless situations – granted, not as grave as the one today – but nevertheless. She learned the importance of having a team and control over your emotions and so will you. While she'd be majorly displeased with your disobedience, she wouldn't be disappointed in you for having to learn. Quite the opposite actually, she'd be proud of you for seeing the wrong in your behavior and resolving to do better. That's everything we want from you and so far, you've lived up to our expectations."
The tears weren't going to be kept at bay anymore and Lucy started sniffling at Steve's words. She'd been convinced her grandma would've been completely appalled at her actions but Steve was so understanding she had to believe him. Before she could dry away the tears, she felt Steve's arms around her that pulled her up from the chair and engulfed her in a tight hug.
Lucy clung onto the man and cried into his shoulder while he soothingly rubbed her back in an attempt to calm her down. When she quieted down, the two pulled back and Steve smiled at the girl.
"Are you okay?"
Sniffling, Lucy nodded and gave a insecure smile in return. "Thank you. Really. I don't know how you can all be this understanding and calm after what we did."
Steve sighed and tightly took her by her shoulders. "You made a mistake but you'll learn from it. The only thing that counts is that you understand the wrong you did and how to handle this in the future. Our job here, Natasha's, mine and everyone else's, is to make sure you know how to do that and what the right path is. We'll never give you up again, for nothing in this world." He smiled gently at her. "Whether you like it or not – the adoption paperwork is almost through."
Lucy grinned back at him. A year ago, the idea of having someone care about her was completely out of question, something she'd only dream about. An adoption by someone she'd admired since she could think was completely out of this world, but here she was – and it was true. It wasn't so unbelievable anymore and she recognized that she'd become more secure in her place in the family. Lucy's actions had been horrendous but at no point had she believed that they'd get rid of her – that didn't mean she wondered why they'd keep her though. If she had a kid like herself, she'd probably thrown her out by now.
With a last smile to Steve, Lucy left the office, determined to find Sam and fulfill Nat's other order. The kitchen was probably her best bet as it was almost dinner time, so she made her way downstairs. She was proven right and thankfully, Clint and Rhodey were also there, so Lucy could make good on her promise and apologize to the entire team.
When she entered the kitchen, the three men turned to face her, their expressions not angry but also not revealing any of the warmth they usually did. Lucy took a deep breath and looked up to return their looks.
"I'm sorry for sneaking onto the mission and making you all worry about me. Especially because you needed to concentrate on the mission, not run after me and save me because I didn't know what was going on or what I was doing. I'm grateful you took care of me and I promise it'll never happen again."
The men's faces relaxed and all three of them smiled now. Clint seemed like he was about to say something so Lucy quickly continued.
"Sam, I'm also sorry that I disobeyed your order to get back to the jet. I know that even though I wasn't authorized, it was still a mission and I promise I'll remember my training from now on." She carefully looked at Sam who had a satisfied smile on his face and opened his arms, which was all the invitation Lucy needed before she flung herself around his neck.
"Thank you for your apology. I trust this is not gonna happen again."
Lucy shook her head vehemently and moved to Clint who also engulfed her in a tight hug.
"Apology accepted. Please don't ever do that again. I don't think I could take the worry and I doubt Nat would find it very amusing." He grinned as Lucy's expression turned horrified at the thought of Nat's reaction to a repeat of this.
After Rhodey had also hugged and forgiven her, Lucy smiled put her hands on her sides.
"Can I help with anything?"
Rhodey nodded immediately. "Yes, please. I was about to put the vegetables on the grill but I'd be much more relaxed if you did that instead of Clint. He can set the table instead."
Everyone laughed at the other man's offended face but Sam shushed him when he tried to argue against the – completely reasonable – assumption that something would explode if he were to handle electric appliances.
Nat walked down the stairs as Tony also made his way towards the kitchen. She smiled at the other man who only sighed when he saw her.
"How'd it go?"
"About as well as you can imagine. I hate this part of parenting but thinking back to the worry they caused us, I wanted to make sure this lesson would stick." She considered him carefully. "You stayed calm?"
Tony nodded. "Yeah, I did, thankfully he was very remorseful. I also sent him to apologize to Cap before we started. He needed a completely clean slate."
"So did I," Natasha nodded. "She should've done it by now."
The man sighed. "I'm just glad it's over. I have the feeling this won't happen again."
Nat had to agree with him. Lucy had been very repentant and she definitely got a harsher punishment than usual. Neither of them wanted to repeat this experience.
When the two turned and could see in the kitchen, they could observe the scene in front of them. Lucy was laughing while Rhodey was tasting the sauce, obviously not to his liking and Clint offered some spice while Sam just shook his head in desperation and placed a hand on Lucy's shoulder.
Tony grinned. "The princess of the Avengers tower."
"Oh please, you don't need to further her ego," Nat huffed. "It's big enough." She pulled him forward and entered the kitchen, making the four turn to them.
As soon as Lucy spotted Tony, she was over to him and carefully inspected his face to find any trace of anger or disappointment. There was none.
"I'm really sorry for sneaking on the mission and being so reckless. I promise it won't happen again."
Tony just smiled and embraced Lucy in a tight hug.
Slowly, the others came in for dinner, Wanda almost crushing Lucy's bones as she hugged her. Lucy was just thankful the witch didn't decide to slap her. Peter slowly sank into the seat next to her, wiggling slightly as his butt connected with the surface and he exchanged a pained look with Lucy. They really had been in this position too often by now but for some reason they needed to learn lessons the hard way. Nevertheless, Lucy was happy. Everyone had forgiven her even though stupidity had seemed to take the reins today and Nat gave her a warm smile as she passed her the salad bowl. Rhodey had been right – they got through this and they even seemed to come out stronger.