This has to be a dream or a nightmare

by yuricrazywolf

"Lexa could hear people telling her to move out of the way but she ignored them as the golden wolf turned its head up looking straight at her. Lexa bit her lip stopping herself from gasping as she stared into pale ice blue eyes, the golden wolf's snarls stopped immediately as it stared right back at her." What will happen next? You'll have to join this adventure to find out ;)

11. Chapter 11

Hello darling fans! Gosh I know that it's been months since there has been an update and I know not many read this part but for those who do this is why it's been so long. While I was in school a few months back I have been putting a lot of hours into passing all my classes then follow that with doing overtime at work which has been…tiring to say the least -_-
We then get hit with the coronavirus and had the say at home order, to sum everything up, school was transitioned onto online and it was unbelievably hard for me and so stressful. But thankfully I passed with hard work and determination!
I have been writing during the stay at home order but then some things happened in my personal life in which I have lost several family members (some to the virus and one to bad health). Then I came very close to losing my job, which is extremely important to me for personal reasons, but I thank the heavens that I manage to keep me work. All of this is has caused me to push aside writing the story because honestly, I wasn't in the right mind space to write anything.
I am feeling much better now and keeping my head held high, this wolf won't go down without a fight! :D Anyways, thank you to those that have taken the time to read this part and please enjoy the new chapter!

Also let I'd like to give a big fluffy hug to Gaywarriorgirls thank you ever so much for helping this silly wolf with her awful grammar and spelling! :D

(small note here, instead of going through trouble of doing the Trigedasleng it is now italicized and certain parts are italicized and underlined, this will make sense as you read on :D)

(See the end of the chapter for more notes.)

Chapter Text

Anya POV

( Before Clarke and Lexa have dinner with Indra and Gustus)

Xx

If Gaia herself didn't smite Anya, then the Lunar Trikru definitely well, she has failed her mission and not just any simple everyday type (like being the head manager of the sanctuary). Anya has failed probably the most vital mission to ever exist in Trikru history, she's allowed her best friend to find out about werewolves and she didn't erase her memory; out of all the people in the world to discover this secret, Lexa is the very creature that should have never found out about their existences. Lexa isn't allowed to remember anything that can reveal her past or it would risk absolutely everything that the Wise Wolves and Lunar Trikru built up for her. Blood and tears of been shed, arguments and fights have broken out, loss and agonizing pain have been felt, and all of it was dealt with in order to give Lexa the chance to survive. The Wise Wolves and Lunar Trikru truly believe that what they agreed upon 19 years ago was the wisest plan when it came to the decision with Lexa; but Anya didn't share their perceptive, she knows deep in her heart that by willingly choosing to defy her mission was the right move.

Anya didn't want this moment to come so soon, she had wanted the chance to slowly inform her dad about what she decided to do. The most she has been able to tell her dad was that she despised her assignment, she has been forced for years to lie to her best friend. Anya has been controlling Lexa without her even knowing and when needed she has manipulated her memories, and Anya hated herself for it. Keeping Lexa from remembering her past has torn her up inside, Anya would rather take a knife to the gut a thousand times rather than to continue to betray her closest friend. When Luna had told her she posted the pictures of Lexa and Clarke online she had been beyond pissed off, it had taken all of her self-control not to snap and harm that girl and because of that damn Luna, Anya has been forced to face her demons far sooner then she liked.

Xx

"What the hell is going on Anya!? What is that Alpha doing with Lexa!?" Indra practically snarls at her, the woman is fuming mad, her hands balled up shaking badly enough that Anya can guess that she'd love nothing more than to punch the daylights out of her. Anya looks at Gustus, she knows he will at least hear her out but he is just as angry and by the way, his face is slowly going red. He isn't too far behind from wanting to clobber her as well. She couldn't exactly blame them, if Anya was in their shoes right now, she knows she'd be feeling the same,

"You know your assignment, it is so simple and you've been doing an excellent job for years. You've kept Lexa on the right path, guided her to follow the Trikru ways, help to suppress her memories, and have been keeping her safe from harm. What has changed?" Gustus asks being far calmer than his wife, Anya fidgets under their heated stars the amount of disappointment they had of her is so overbearing it feels like she can evaporate. She looks away from their gaze keeping her attention on the hardwood polished floor, choosing to study each cut of the perfectly trimmed wood. Anya can't meet their eyes; she can't stand to see just how pissed they are that she has betrayed them.

Xx

When Lexa had found that wolf in that wild forest fire, Anya didn't think much of it, she had assumed that the wolf was corrupted since it was alone and it didn't even have a lunar flower anywhere near it. So, Anya had the wolf transferred to the Sanctuary like it had been no big deal, while she went to the hospital to make sure Lexa was alright. Indra and Gustus were angry when they heard of what happened, (Anya got chowed out for letting Lexa help with the wildfire) but they had been happy to know that the wolf that bit her was corrupted because it meant it wasn't an intentional attack. Anya had reassured Lexa's parents she'd get their daughter back to health and be up in running in no time and the blonde wolf was forgotten.

Apparently, that wasn't going to be Gaia's plan, the Goddess just had to throw a wrench in her path, well more like a fucking avalanche, because things changed when she actually came face to face with the golden wolf. Anya was there with the vet when he looked the blonde wolf over, she saw for herself how badly the wolf had been mistreated, scars marking almost every inch of her skin, underweight enough to see several of her bones, and her organs so messed up that the golden wolf couldn't physical eat her appetite meal intake. Anya thought for sure that the sane part of the blonde wolf was long gone, but then the wolf opened her eyes and Anya was shocked to be staring into a pair of ice blues instead of yellows, some sanity was still intact in the girl. Once she was alone with the blonde wolf, she showed her the tattoo reassuring the wolf that she was a friend and she is a part of the Lunar Trikru guardians, but instead of the golden wolf connecting with her, she tried to attack. After that Anya had figured that maybe the wolf was just slowly corrupting and she had let things play out, she submitted the giant with the others and that would be the end of it.

Yet, the wolf still kept those blue eyes even when years went by with her living with the other corrupts and never once has Clarke tried to create a link with her. Anya could see as clear as day that Clarke was not going to become corrupt any time soon and she was supposed to report immediately to the tribe, but she didn't. Anya simply couldn't bring herself to call to inform her tribe of the situation because the blonde wolf had already been on thin ice and she didn't know what the Wise Wolves would do to her. The Wise Wolves want strong and healthy Alphas to be able to reproduce and keep their population growing, so who knows what they would have done to an alpha that was slowly losing herself. Then there was that mess with the hunters who somehow got into the sanctuary, each person has tried to kill Clarke for her coat, and in some twisted way, she understood why. Anya can only imagine how much someone would spend to own her coat, some psychos actually want real authentic golden fur, they probably spend over $40K just to be able to brag about it.

Anya felt like some great cosmos force either wanted Clarke dead or corrupted, everyone seemed to be against the poor girl and she had to put a stop to it. So, Anya broke the rules and kept Clarke a secret so that the wolf could at least live out the rest of her days in peace, there was no way she'd have Clarke be released when she had such an obvious hatred for the human race. Yet, Anya felt miserable for the blonde, a wolf still keen to the world around her, and each day that wolf looked like she wanted death to finally catch up.

Anya couldn't stand by and watch it happen, she wanted to help, she tried talking to her about who she was and what her tribe could do to help, but Clarke wanted nothing to do with her. The blonde wolf only saw Anya as the person that kept her in a cage and treated her like she was beneath her (when in reality, the wolf is above her). Clarke didn't want Anya's help and that was when she knew she had to have Lexa do it; for whatever reason Clarke didn't kill Lexa when they first met and that had to mean that Clarke trusted her in some way so Lexa would be perfect for the job.

Thereafter, Anya began telling Lexa about the wolf that she had saved. She acted as if she couldn't stand Clarke and wanted to give up on trying to help, she knew her best friend would latch on to that responsibility in a heartbeat. Anya had been so happy to see those two working together, since the first day Lexa earned the wolf's trust to allow her touch, where Anya and several others would have lost their hand if they were within reach of the giant predator. Anya became hopeful with the rate that Clarke was improving, that she began thinking of getting her released to the tribe, and then they would jump in and take care of the rest. The plan would have worked out perfectly, Anya's tribe would help Clarke live her life with other wolves as herself and Lexa would only know that she helped a caged wolf be free; Anya wouldn't have been betraying her tribe's trust or broken the main rule.

But life just had to test her because, in the process of that said plan, Anya has had numerous mini heart attacks when she has caught Lexa putting herself in countless dangerous situations. She had considered calling off the plan immediately but then she had witnessed how this huge wolf who could snap a bone in half with one bite, become a sweet puppy just from having Lexa beside her. That was the first sign, Anya should have known something was up and the second sign came when Lexa had been attacked by Molly and Clarke protected her, the alpha choosing a person over her own wolves. Anya figured out by then that they had to have feelings for one another, she kind of hoped that the feelings they shared were sisterly but then Lexa saw Clarke's human form and well it didn't take a genius to see they were both attracted to each other. Anya can honestly say she has never met any couple more in love than those two dorks, the way they read each other like open books, how they copied each other in littlest ways, and both constantly reassuring each other when the other was upset. Anya made a promise to herself that she was going to fight for them to be together even if it meant turning against her own tribe.

xx

"Lexa changed, she's had more life in her in these last few months then she has ever had in her whole life, and I have that wolf to thank. Clarke has brought out the real Lexa faster than I ever could, a lone alpha wants the girl that the Wise Wolves deemed a disgrace," Anya finally found the courage to say, she looked up holding her head high even though she wants to look down but she has to stand firm, she is doing this for Lexa and Clarke. She is going to be strong for them and damn anyone to hell who thought they could change her mind. "You're right, I have been doing a good job since the day I was assigned to Lexa when I was just a little girl. But every year that has passed by I have watched Lexa's personality fade and become lifeless!" Anya snapped this time, not bothering to hold back her anger, why should she? She has been ordered to basically let her childhood friend vanish, pushed to witness the girl she grew up with drift away and become a stranger.

Anya had watched in dismay as Lexa would drown herself from the outside world, never wanting anyone to be close after having been bullied for trying to act like a "normal" person. From there on Lexa has taken one day at a time, fixated on needing to save the animals, and learning that she had a gift for being able to help them. Lexa's passion has driven her to ignore her own needs, believing that she was placed on this earth in order to protect and rehabilitate the abused animals. Anya has tried to keep her life exciting in the normal world, going to parties to hook up with girls and just being wild, or going to concerts to experience the high of adrenaline when exposed to people's upbeat energy, or even going to random events and fairs like Pride Fest. She'll give Lexa credit though, she went to all of them with Anya, but none of them kept her interest for long before she was drawn to the animals again and in reality, Lexa constantly wanted to work with wolves.

Anya can see how her words affect Indra and Gustus, how the logic in her words has pierced them in the hearts. Gustus looks to Indra, his face downcast because he can't hide the fact that this whole assignment is pure hell. Indra only spares him a glance but the split break of eye contact tells Anya they hate this mission just as much or even more so than her. Anya is standing there waiting for someone to speak up as the room falls silent and they can hear Lexa and Clarke walking around upstairs, the few squeaks of the old wood makes it sound like they are stomping. Indra closes her eyes and takes a deep breath controlling her emotions, shoving her true feelings down, she opens her eyes, and there's a hard edge reflecting in them.

"You've allowed your emotions to get in the way, Anya. Now because of you, we may have to erase Lexa's mind of this alpha, or we must kill her. The whole reason for this mission was to give Lexa the chance to live and you have ruined it," Indra spoke low and cold, like freezer burn on the tip of one's fingers, Anya felt her stomach knot and she strained to keep the tears from forming in her eyes. She bit the inside of her cheek to keep from crying, she wasn't going to let either of those things happen, not when there was a third option. Gustus may be in agreement with her because he is such a gentle soul that he glares down at his wife.

"Indra, do not be so curl, we don't know if this may affect Lexa! There is still a chance that things will remain the same; Lexa doesn't even know that this girl is a wolf and the alpha knows she can't say anything about her kind," Gustus looks to Anya to confirm the claim, honestly, it burns at Anya's soul that she has to look away because she can't back him up. The two go off in a tangent of curses as both of them become angrier than before and they are just about ready to backhand her. But before either of them can lunge at her a loud thump sounds off above them followed by scampering and another louder bang. Indra and Gustus both look at Anya as if she is able to know what is going on upstairs,

"I'll go check and so you know, Lexa didn't react badly when she found out about Clarke, didn't even freak out. Lexa accepted Clarke immediately, she's been fascinated by her ever since wanting to know everything about her. Even with how much time Lexa spends with Clarke there have been no triggers for Lexa's old memories," Anya backed out of the kitchen heading to the stairs, the pair kept looking up towards Lexa's room being obvious that they want to see for themselves what was going on; but they seem to still have some amount of trust in Anya to allow her to go instead, "I know you guys love Lexa just as much as I do and you know deep down that this whole mission is bullshit and unfair. I have faith that Lexa is strong enough to handle the truth about everything with the Lunar Tribe and even her origins, but only if she has Clarke," Anya paused once she reached the doorway to the hall wanting them to understand that she is being serious and that none of this is a joke. Indra and Gustus exchanged a glance trying to communicate nonverbally what choice would be best, Anya hoped to Gaia that they at least wouldn't make a rash decision.

"Before you try anything with Lexa, can you at least witness for yourself how much Lexa cares about Clarke and how much that alpha worships your daughter?" Maybe mentioning Clarke a few times wasn't the best move but Anya really wants to drive the point home that Lexa needs Clarke in her life just as much as the alpha needs her. Anya isn't blind, she's noticed the yellow in Clarke's eye, the third sign to the alpha becoming corrupted and she can only assume that it's thanks to Lexa that Clarke hasn't reached level six.

Anya knows for a fact that Gustus and Indra are probably the most loyal of the Trikru tribe, they have dedicated their whole lives to following the rules set down by their Heda. Never once have they strayed from the path that Heda sets for them when their commander gave orders the pair always followed through. Gustus and Indra have helped raise the newborns, they have guarded mothers to be, and they were even chosen by the Wise Wolves themselves to be the ones that raise Lexa (well, second after the last couple).

Heda is proud of them, she values them, trusts them so much that she has faith in them to stick to their current mission. Anya is asking a lot of them; she is basically telling them they may have to dishonor their Heda. She tries to shove down her own dismay at the fact that she has already dishonored the commander. Before Anya can dwell on that thought any longer, Indra is the first to cave as she lets out the breath she's been holding in,

"I am still angry at what you have chosen to do Anya, to make a decision that defies both our Heda and the Wise Wolves order all those years ago is absolutely foolish," Indra barked out irritated but she is not nearly as enraged as before, she looks to Gustus first and he nods, seeming to already agree what his wife will say next. Indra looks back at Anya fixing her with a furious glare, "However, you are right, we truly love Lexa, she is the only child we will ever have and we wish for her happiness. For this reason, we will see if this alpha truly is worth the world of hell, we all must go through if they are to remain together. Heda nor the Wise Wolves will be pleased with this, I hope that you are prepared for the consequences of your actions," Indra waves her off, instructing her to move along as she turns to Gustus to speak further on this new change. Anya sighs, turning away and quickly heading upstairs, even though Indra has agreed to at least see for herself how Clarke cares for Lexa, she is still afraid.

Anya stood outside of Lexa's old childhood door, glaring at the wooden frame as if it was reasonable for the mess, she was in. Why Heda believed that she could handle this mission was beyond Anya, there were so many others in her tribe that could have been assigned but no, it had to be her. Anya can feel the tears falling down her cheeks, she wanted to scream, there is too much burden on her shoulders and the weight of it all is going to kill her one day. Anya whipped off her cheeks taking a deep breath to ease her heart and to claim the storm threatening to burst out. She reached out to open the door but the knob didn't turn, confused she stepped closer to the door and pressed her ear to the flat surface,

"Yeah, no pups yet, we can wait on that. For now, though to help you work through your ruts we-"

"Son of a bitch, seriously, Clarke!" Anya whisper yells as she moves away from the door, she should have snapped and kicked open the door that this stupid (yet kind-hearted) alpha has revealed anther secret but instead Anya is finding it extremely difficult not to burst out laughing. She has to move away from the door and put a hand over her mouth to stop the laughter from slipping out. Anya laughs as softly as she can and hopes that Clarke isn't able to hear her, it only takes a short moment of being around these two and their shenanigans that Anya's stress is forgotten.

Anya shakes her head, to think that Lexa who has never been interested in sex with a guy is willing to be intimate with Clarke in her rut is outstanding. Lexa must really be deeply in love with this clueless wolf. Anya sighs moving towards the door again and knocks loudly to both alert and spook them. She can hear someone scrambling off the spring bed and hitting the floor before heading towards the door.

"I'm hoping the door is locked because you two are changing or finishing up. Either way, you need to let me in Lexa," Anya speaks loud enough for them to hear her so they don't think it's Indra or Gustus on the other side. As Lexa works to unlock the door Anya takes a moment to collect herself and hide all of her burdens yet again. She prays to Gaia with all her heart that everything will work out for everyone, she accepts the fact that Heda will cast her out, knows that the Lunar honored Trikru will undoubtedly hate her. She knows she will be disappointing her dad...but she can only hope that if Lexa finds out the truth about everything that she will not hate Anya by the end.

Xxxxxxxxxxxx

Clarke's POV

(After the dinner with Indra and Gustus)

"Why aren't you wearing these?" Clarke questions as Anya wraps a large ring of flowers around her throat. The older female is making sure that the ribbon the flowers are stitched into is not too tight on her skin, she feels the female push two fingers between the ribbon and her throat then wiggles them. Clarke shivers lightly when she feels something wet on Anya's fingers or maybe they were cold, whatever it was the sensation soon disappears. Anya is very keen on making sure this collar is in place, once she is satisfied with the one on her neck she gestures for Clarke to give her the left hand.

"We have the newcomers wear them, it's so everyone knows you are a guest and not some stranger coming to crash the festival," Anya laughs but there isn't much humor to her tone if anything Clarke picks up on anxiousness and maybe even fear but it is hard to tell when the flowers let off such a strong smell. She can barely pick up Lexa's scent who is still in the car with her mom and is talking with her parents and Anya's dad, the group is talking quietly in their mother tongue. She thinks she picks up on her name being mentioned but still, it's unclear, she glances back at Lexa to be sure that her mate to be hasn't called though Lexa faces Anya's dad so maybe they are simply talking about Clarke, hopefully good things.

When Clarke and them came across Anya and her dad, they barely had made it into the forest and she hadn't noticed them right away; Clarke had been too busy talking with Gustus about which part of the forest is best to find bucks. She'd been drooling about the idea of taking down a nice fat buck when something nearly tall as a pine tree approached their group; that massive male made Clarke yelp like some wimpy pup. She nearly had a heart attack while that damn male had the nerve to laugh at her along with the other humans.

Clarke was humiliated that the human could scare her, but really what bloody creature approaches literally out of the shadows without even announcing themselves? Once Clarke's heart settled down along with some comforting words from Lexa, the male introduced himself as Nyko Pine, father of Anya and historian for the Trikru tribe. She tried to be as polite as possible but she was a little angry at being frightened and irritated that she didn't detect them by smell immediately. Clarke was truly worried for a brief moment that she had let her guard down too much and exposed her group to potential danger. Yet when she scented the strong aroma of flowers, she saw that Anya was holding on to bunches of the sweet plant. Clarke would have snapped at her for messing with her sense of smell but the older female said the flowers were meant for her as by tradition and now, Anya is working to put them on.

"Why would someone want to run into a party just to bash into everything? That's very rude, I hope there are other humans to keep those reckless delinquents in check," Clarke huffs as Anya secures the last flowers around her right wrist, the female meets her gaze and she can see something spark within them but for the most part, they remain distant.

"Clarke if there was a trophy for cluelessness, you would win it in a heartbeat," Anya laughs staring at her for a while as if studying her mood, maybe the human worries Clarke will not be able to handle being around their tribe or maybe it is something else that has the human's eyes shifting to where the others are then back to herself. Anya is not behaving like her normal confident self, the female is being so withdrawn it made Clarke's belly stir, her wolf demands that she must comfort her pack sister,

"Thank you, Anya, what is wrong?" Clarke reaches out placing her hand at the side of Anya's neck when her eyes linger more upon the group. A quick glance to them Clarke can see that Lexa is peacefully talking with her family, for a moment her mind spaces out as she thinks of how much confidence her lover has that Clarke will be accepted by their Heda. Clarke isn't as confident as her love, she worries that more lies will have to flow out her mouth before this great woman decides if she is worthy of Lexa, it's rather a lot of pressure. Clarke feels Anya's heart rate elevate against the pads of her fingers as the older female laughs and gently pushes her hand away,

"I'm fine Clarke, no worries, just wondering if a clumsy girl like you can really keep her other half-hidden," Anya winks to indicate that she is joking but there is truth to the words. Clarke doesn't linger on the exchange for long as Anya slings an arm around her shoulder to lead them back to the group. Clarke isn't a stupid, she knows Anya is lying, something is bothering her but whatever it is the female is not ready to reveal what troubles her. Clarke will drop the subject for now but once Anya, Lexa, and herself are all home Clarke will pry the answers out of her pack sister. Once she and Anya approach them, Lexa looks over and Clarke can practically feel as her lover's eyes glide up and down her body, Clarke feels the heat rising to her cheeks.

"You look beautiful, like a pink rose in a garden of plain flowers," Lexa winks, and Clarke can't help but laugh feeling her face grower warmer, her love gestures to get into the cart, she wants to protest but at the same time she can't exactly turn down Lexa twice. Plus, her parents are watching to see her next move, to reject Lexa again will be seen as disrespectful and they could see Clarke as being uptight if she were to do so. Reluctantly she moved towards the back of the cart, while she was working out how to get into the thing she hadn't noticed Indra and Gustus exchanging a long glance.

"What a romantic you have raised Indra, though I suspect it mostly comes from the father," Nyko walks over to Clarke and she has to bite her lip before she can bear some fangs. Clarke still doesn't like to be close to any strangers, it makes her feel uneasy and to make matters worse the male holds out his hand to her. Nyko is silently offering to help Clarke inside the wooden crate, she intended to slap it away but a quick glance at Lexa tells her that wouldn't be a smart move. Unwillingly Clarke took the large male's hand and allows him to help her get into the cart while Lexa hopped down, she cast Lexa a quick glare feeling like she'd been tricked,

"Of course she gets it from me! Indra is too straight forward, no mystery or surprises," Gustus chuckles as he settles back into pulling the crate after Clarke is seated comfortably, Nyko then takes a spot beside Lexa's dad to help him. The males effortlessly move the cart along Clarke may have been slightly impressed that the humans actually have enough strength to move the cart smoothly. She takes the chance to observe her surroundings from the new height advantage. She can see further into the forest even being able to make out a few prey that are searching for a late-night snack. Clarke feels her stomach growl as if it is taunting her about how little she's eaten today, she ignores the small ache and keeps her focus on the trees around them. Though the meat that Clarke had at dinner was hefty, it wasn't enough to keep her full, it merely calmed the ache in her stomach from the morning.

The forest isn't nearly as dark as it normally is, maybe it's due to the orange glow in the distance which is where they are heading. She can hear the faint mummers of the humans but they aren't close enough for her to make out any words. Clarke can't say she is disappointed having to ride the cart, the height difference is a real bonus, she considers standing up to see how much more she can see but she pushes the idea out of her mind since she doesn't have the best balance on this contraption.

"Keep this up and you'll be surprised where you'll be sleeping tonight," Indra warns her husband, the male only laughs as he focuses his energy on the new rough patch on land. The new trail causes some of the things in the cart to shuffle so Indra reaches down to adjust the bags that are settled between them. Clarke lifts her feet in order to give Indra the chance to fix things to her liking, the movement causes Indra to glance at her legs which then leads the female to take notice of the scars around her ankles.

Indra freezes for a split second the female takes in the new scars just as she did when Clarke had sat across from her at dinner. She can see that Indra wants to know how she's gotten them but she holds her tongue, which Clarke is grateful for, she has no shame for the many marks that cover her skin. Clarke knows that humans just have an odd fixation for things that don't appear "normal" so she isn't angry for when humans stare but to ask how the scars came to be is a different story. Indra manages to tear her gaze away from the marks and meet Clarke's eyes, the female slightly finches when she sees that Clarke is always watching her but she only smiles to reassure the female that no harm is done.

"You're going to love this festival Clarke, there will be lots of things we get to listen to the old music, eating lots of festive foods, listening to old tales, plus my grandparents are just going to adore you!" Lexa chatters excitedly as she walks beside the cart, Clarke hears Indra let out a fake laugh followed by something in Trigedasleng. Clarke was going to ask what she said but then Lexa continued to chat away and she didn't want to be rude to her mate to be.

She tunes out most of what Lexa is saying because she can't help but feel wrong that Lexa is having to walk as Clarke is given a ride. Clarke doesn't hate the cart but she isn't practically happy with it, besides the obvious factor considering Lexa, she feels weird that she is being pampered like some omega. Which of course all omega should be loved and spoiled since they are the only wolves that can carry on the next generation, but for an alpha to be treated this way isn't right. The older adults babble amongst themselves and Clarke does her best to ignore the temporary treatment in order to give Lexa her full attention. Lexa is explaining how her grandparents will want to know everything about her and she saddles hints that they will have to continue the lies. Clarke lets out a displeased grunt, all of these lies are slowly going to consume her, a good wolf stays true to their word, a lying wolf will get back lashes.

Clarke notices as they head deeper into the forest that there are a few other humans walking along the path as they are, some even wave and call out a greeting. She does her best to keep her attention on Lexa but something is making her stomach stir, as if something bad is going to happen tonight and she has to be aware, the feeling soon has her observing the surroundings. Clarke keeps her focus on both Lexa and the human's safety, vowing she will protect them from any harm that may come their way. But she has to admit her sense of smell is being distracted by the many flowers she is decorated in, with all these damn things on Clarke she can't even smell right, hell she could even be mistaken for an omega.

Xxxxxxx

Clarke can't believe her eyes, there are hundreds of humans all around she has never seen so many in one place, she isn't sure if she should be more nervous or excited, maybe both. There are humans of all ages from small pups that babbled nonsense to older ones with silver in their hair and a number of them gathered in different groups. The human pups that we're able to walk were together off to the side running about and yelling excitedly, they chase one another while their parents watch from not too far away. The middle-aged adults were either helping to organize tables with different sorts of foods, jewels, and clothing or they were trading off for things that were set out.

The area the humans are gathered in is surrounded by large torches placed all around in a huge square, the fire's light shines bright enough to keep most of the darkness out. A few humans stand close by the fire posts most of them facing the outside most likely they were the guards to keep out the party crashes as Anya has mentioned. Even with the chatter of all the humans, Clarke can hear instruments playing somewhere in all the mess,though she doesn't recognize any of the sounds that play, it piqued her interest to find out. Clarke notices a few other humans that also wore flowers just as she is, it is actually reassuring to know that she isn't the only one that is a guest. Yet the flowers Anya gave her are a single white color while others had a variety of color hues, she wonders if there is a reason for the difference.

Gustus and Nyko walk straight through the crowd, having no issues with pulling the cart onward and other humans were kind enough to move out of the way and some of them even shot towards others to clear a path as Clarke and them pass through. While they dove deeper into the crowd the noises that surround the place become overwhelming. The humans are talking both in English and Trigedasleng, some of them shouting at the top of their lungs to get the attention of others and young pups screech from either hunger or delight. While humans busy themselves with warming up the food their utensils bang and scarp as loud as claws at a concert. The music that plays is blaring, it isn't balanced, there is some instrument that screeches like the dying cries of a helpless bird.

Clarke wants to cover her ears, she isn't liking all this commotion, her skin is crawling with unease and to make matters worse the humans are definitely taking notice of her, they are staring. Why is she growing so anxious? She's dealt with loud noises before like when she used to perform or that time Clarke had been to the club with Lexa but back then the humans were drowned out by the music. This right here was different, there were no other sounds to distract Clarke from the rest and it didn't make her feel any less easy that the humans were observing her. And it wasn't like being in the restaurant on her double date with Luna and Anya; those humans didn't know what Clarke is but they could sense her deference and she took comfort from feeling their fear which had given her the edge to be brave. But the Trikru tribe is different, a few of them feared her unknowingly, yet amongst these humans, some of them gave off a feeling that confuses her, respect, admiration, and if she isn't mistaken pride?

Clarke squirms in place, her claws lengthening and sharpening, she is remembering those darker days when she'd be required to dance and entertain the crowds of humans. How Nia would blow into that whistle and she lay flat on the stage, head between her paws, eyes to the ground, be a good girl, and only when the music played was she allowed to move. When the music would start and she moved to the beat of it, she'd match the sound because Clarke knew she'd pay dearly if she failed, all the while the humans laughed, calling her a good dog, an obedient bitch, a pretty puppy, and humans even dared to touch her.

The one time a human first successfully touched Clarke, she had turned around so fast and snapped at the male's fleeing hand. Nia had been outraged not only at Clarke but at the male as well, the she-devil walked right up to that human and slapped him across his face hard enough that he lost his footing. Nia yelled at him to never touch what belonged to her and had him escorted out of the party. Once he was no longer in sight Nia used her cane to strike Clarke across her snot hard enough to make her nose bleed, she had then been muzzled and tossed into her cage. Clarke was restricted to the basement for an enter month, even when Nia continued the parties the she-devil wouldn't allow anyone to come to see her prized pet. After that event, the humans weren't allowed to be anywhere near Clarke while she was performing.

Clarke let out a small whine hoping that Lexa will comfort the growing stress, she hadn't expected to have this kind of reaction, foolishly Clarke thought she was brave enough. But it seems Lexa can't hear her over all these sounds and her love is too far down to reach. Clarke considers reaching down to grab Lexa's shirt or something; she doesn't care if she flashes her underwear because of the dress, even if Lexa has told her it's not ladylike. Clarke feels like a worthless wolf, as strong and fearsome as she can be. Clarke is still so terrified of her past repeating that she needs the touch of a human to calm her fears.

(Short panic attack!) not sure if this considered an anxiety attack or panic attack (-_-')

Clarke isn't sure she can do this, after all, these humans keep staring up at her like she is a display, a thing to admire, a thing to tarnish, a thing to fake admiration. What alpha can't simply handle a crowd of humans? Why do these weak pathetic creatures have to put her on edge? She isn't weak...right?! Clarke has torn apart humans who have tried to kill her, she has made them scream, she's made them feel pain, she has even defended herself against her old owner! But that was only when she had to protect Nylah and she only seems to have the strength to defend herself when she's in danger, why can't she be brave enough to handle a gathering of humans? Clarke whimpers, how pathetic...

Clarke's vision goes cloudy, everything around her vanishes, her ears ring as they slowly cancel out all sounds, and she can only hear the thundering race of her own heart. She closes herself off from the threats surrounding her and her wolf mind takes advantage and begins presenting images after images, showing Clarke how easy it will be to crush these humans beneath her paws. How her true form can make these pitiful humans whimper like pups as they have made Clarke do so. She only needs to bare her fangs, snarl, swipe at them with the claws, and she'd be free of the humans that want their entertainment, the temptation to change forms grows. Clarke's eyes water, she feels so weak in this human body, this form is just another way to mock the fact that she can never fit into this crowd, that she is alone, no one wants her like this,

Clarke has to be true to herself and the wolf mind is proving that it makes more sense to embrace what she should have been a long time ago, mindless. Why not give in to her wolf? That mind will erase the past; all the years she has been mistreated; all the times that someone has raised their hand at her to make her cower; how she took their beating again and again and again; she let those humans tear away a part of Clarke that will be forever gone. The pain that weighs on the chest has her gasping and the wolf mind is giving her the chance to get rid of it; all she has to do is embrace her wolf's ways. Clarke can feel her human mind trying to fight back, desperate to remind her there is a huge reason why she hasn't given up her human self.

(End of an anxiety attack!)

Clarke feels something tapping her leg and she whips around ready to attack whoever touches her, but her human mind screams within to stop immediately, and then she remembers. The world around Clarke comes back, she feels the movement of the cart beneath her, the sounds of the Trikru tribe shouting in thrill, and she is staring at the female that raised her greatest love, Indra (who oddly enough is holding out a pair of earplugs). She doesn't take them right away; Clarke has learned what they are meant for but she doesn't understand why the human wants to give them to her. Clarke pushes aside her momentary breakdown in order to pay attention, she makes a mental note that she has to tell Lexa about the mild meltdown when they are alone.

Indra didn't seem to anticipate that she would hesitate, Clarke guesses she may mistake her hesitation for wanting an explanation as to the human studies, her eyes narrowing as though she is trying to solve some complicated problem. she wonders how long the female has been offering the plastic cones, Clarke isn't even sure on how time has passed while she momentarily lost herself. But Clarke's isn't about to admit to this stranger that her two minds decide to battle out for dominance out of the blue, which is something rather concerning since this hasn't happened in a while, but she'll have to think that over once she's alone.

"They're new I promise when Lexa was younger and attended her first festival, she struggled with large crowds and they made her have panic attacks, but when she puts in a pair of these, it has helped," Indra adverts her eyes as she offers the earplugs again, Clarke studies the female's face trying to understand this human, she was grateful for the distraction as it helped to bottle up the earlier issue.

When she and Lexa were dining with the married pair, Indra had been distant and rather rude, she'd constantly shown her distaste for whenever Clarke refused to answer any questions on her history. Yet what bothered her most was when Clarke had traded plates with Lexa, Indra made a sound of disgust as if Clarke had just given her daughter the scraps off a poor hunt. Clarke chose to give the human the benefit of the doubt, that maybe she misheard her (though she seriously doubted it considering her excellent hearing). Maybe the human just had the urge to protect her only child, Indra could not be ready to let go of her daughter and for that reason, Clarke is giving her more patience.

"Thank you, Mrs. Woods, I'm sure they will definitely help later on," Clarke smiles, perhaps showing some fangs for Indra glances at her mouth as she reaches over to grab the small cones. Clarke pockets the earplugs inside her dress, she'd use them for when she absolutely needs them, it's bad enough that the human witnessed her momentary weakness,

"You're different from them," Indra mutters as she looks ahead of them as they slow down, Gustus and Niko are needing to ask humans to move aside so that they may pass. The humans are polite enough to move out of the way as the large males have to be more creative with moving around the humans, they already seem to have decantation in mind. Clarke has a good guess as to where the males want to take them, just ahead there is an empty slot of land right along with the other food booths.

"Different from who?" Clarke questions as she observes the surroundings, she glances down to make sure Lexa is not having any issues with walking amongst the mass but she is doing fine. Lexa is chatting with Anya, easily navigating with the humans that move in the opposite direction, some humans even exchange greetings. Anya glances up at Clarke who gives her a smile then mouths out if she is alright and Lexa of course notices and looks up at her as well, Clarke chuckles nodding to reassure them. Anya makes peace with the answer but Lexa does not, she holds her hand up signaling which number Clarke is feeling right now. She knows she needs to be honest but Clarke doesn't want to address her earlier issue just yet, so she signals a 1, uncomfortable but stable...she feels guilt nipping at her heel,

"No one dear, my inner thoughts came out, it happens with old age. Don't you find the mind to be such an incredible thing?" Indra looks over to some humans that Clarke assumes to be her friends as they wave to her. "Just a passing thought I have been having recently, but wouldn't it be interesting if someone so powerful that they can actually will another person to do whatever they wanted?" Indra doesn't look at her directly, but the words were meant for Clarke all the same, she glanced at the older female curiously, what was she trying to imply? Or was she simply making conversation?

Clarke thinks of her own ability to command another creature, she doesn't do it all the time even though the power feels incredible, but it also feels wrong. Clarke has once commanded Jam to leave her alone when he wouldn't stop biting her paws and he obeyed, but the look of confusion that crossed his face made her feel awful. Jam spent at least a few hours walking around dazed with glossy eyes and did exactly what he was told, staying completely away from Clarke. Lexa and Lincoln noticed the change in Jam; they both worried that the mutt was sick or that he was in some sort of pain. She didn't say anything because she felt guilty for being the cause of all the worry and it was only Anya that somehow knew what was wrong. Anya was kind enough to speak to Clarke alone and question if she had done something to the dog and she admitted to the crime. Clarke expected Anya to be angry at her for forcing a creature to go against its nature but instead, her pack sister asked her to undo the command and ask that she not do it again. She did as she was asked and tried to defend her actions but then Anya told her to remember how Clarke's handlers forced her to do many things and to think of how that felt before she ever tries to control someone else,

"I guess that is interesting, but I find it wrong to want to control anyone. No living creature should be forced to do anything that they don't want to do," Clarke replied, keeping her gaze forward as she spoke to Indra, it sounds hypocritical to her own ears considering she's done it before but she hasn't done it just for the hell of it. Clarke thinks of what Anya told her to remember and she feels the pain of what it's like to be controlled, "I can see why some creatures want to be able to have control over another, to have things go your way, to have no struggles, and to have that controlled wo- person be perfect," Clarke feels Indra's eyes on her this time, the human staring at her face intensely but her expression is blank and she shows no emotion, so she can't gauge whether or not she has offended her. Clarke faces the female, meeting her eyes as she holds her head higher and for a second Indra casts her gaze down before meeting hers once again.

"But then I imagine the point of view of the controlled and think of how frustrating and terrifying it would be to be in their place," Clarke says with a bit more growl then she meant to but she isn't going to apologize, she means what she says and if Indra doesn't like her answer then too bad. "It's none of your concern how I know this but to have someone control you to the point that you have no will? What twisted sick monster would want to do that?" Indra stares at her longer gaze drifting all over Clarke's face, she can see how the human is trying to puzzle something out in her mind but Clarke stays firm, keeping her eyes firmly on the female even when she feels Lexa tugging at her dress she doesn't look away.

"You make a fair point Clarke, good to know Lexa has found her a smart one," Indra uses the edge of the cart to get to her feet holding onto the ledge as she makes her way out. Clarke isn't going to offer help, if what she can guess about this female she absolutely hates being treated like a weakling. She glances around surprised to see that they have been stopped for a while and someone had already removed the boar meat that was in the middle of the cart. Clarke sees Gustus adjusting some things on the table that's been set up and Nyko has begun a fire to keep the meat warm. She hears her name being called again along with another tug at her clothes,

"Hey, is everything ok?" Lexa calls out and this time Clarke looks down at her, the expression she has speaks of the worry that is building on her shoulders. Clarke smiles at her love before she grabs the edge of the cart and jumps out of the wooden box. She barely gives her mate to be a chance to react as Lexa quickly backs up holding out her arms as if she needs to catch her but Clarke easily landed on her feet.

"Yes, your mom was just making small talk, I think?" Clarke wonders, not really sure herself because the choice of subject was very different compared to other conversations that she's had. Clarke glances back at the older female as her husband helps her get out of the cart, Indra's question felt rather specific, like the older female knew something. She pondered if maybe this female knew Clarke is a wolf or maybe that Indra is a wolf herself but she has no scent of one or maybe Clarke has been reading too many of Lexa's mystery books. Clarke shakes her head, that has to be it, she was very good at hiding her wolf tonight to the point it makes her feel shameful. She hears Lexa chuckle and she looks to her, Lexa is looking at her mom a smile tugging at her lips,

"I was sure she'd try to tell some embarrassing stories about me like from when I was a kid," Lexa grins, Clarke has seen her lover happy before but this is a whole new level of excitement, she is practically jumping in place. Clarke smirks and the overwhelming joy is something new to her, Lexa is normally a calm human but here amongst those she knows and understands she is like a pup. "My grandparents are around here somewhere, so we'll run into them eventually. My parents said it will be fine if I go ahead and show you around, there is so much to see, where should we start? Maybe music? Or maybe see if the elders are still sharing stories? Or we could go see Greta, she made that painting you liked in the dining room! And why are you looking at me like that?" Lexa laughs her cheek going red and slowly spreading to her entire face,

"I don't think I have ever seen you this excited before, it usually feels like it's just me that acts this way," Clarke grabs Lexa by her hips and pulls her in for a kiss, her female grants her the affection but pulls away when Clarke tries to nip. She bares her fangs to show distaste for being denied what she craves, Lexa grins as she places another kiss to her forehead,

"Behave, my parents are right behind you and I highly doubt they'd want to see their little girl making out in front of them," Lexa's tone turns serious but Clarke smiles only understanding that they would need to find somewhere away from the parents if she wants her tongue to invade Lexa's mouth. She sighs, releasing her love and taking this moment to grab the earplugs from her dress pocket. Clarke notices that Lexa has some carrying pouch slung on her shoulder, the bag resting on her hip. The size of it is rather hefty but it seems Lexa isn't struggling with whatever lay inside. She takes a small whiff but can barely make out a scent, but Clarke guesses she scents metallic though her flowers didn't help any,

"Fine, I'll behave," Clarke puts in the first earplug and she catches the questioning look on Lexa's face "your mom gave them to me, it's kind of loud for me," Clarke explains, beginning to tense up now that she is amongst the humans and she feels her wolf mind urging to change forms to warn these humans that they must keep their distance. Clarke's skin prickles as small bits of fur poke through her pours, claws scratching at the surface of her nails, and she knows that she shouldn't be walking around these humans. Yet Clarke doesn't want to spoil Lexa's fun, her mate to be is glowing while she waits patiently to show her world to her.

"That's sweet, maybe my mom does have a sweet spot for you after all," Lexa takes her hand once Clarke is ready even with the comforting warmth of Lexa's fingers interlocking between her own she can't stop her body from trembling as Lexa pulls her into the crowd. Clarke doesn't reply because she can't think of what to say, she is trying to keep herself from losing control. Lexa tugs her along gently, her enthusiasm seems to blind her to the fact that Clarke is not comfortable, yet she doesn't have it in her to admit that she's...afraid. Clarke expects that the humans will rub or bump against her as they walk on but oddly enough, she notices that most of the humans actually move out of their own accord.

"So where should we go first, my mate to be?" Clarke questions, she relaxes a little when the humans don't invade her space, it almost seems like they were doing so on purpose. She sees a few of the humans glancing at the flowers that decorate her body before meeting Clarke's eyes, some of them smile or tilt their heads to the side. The head tilts remind Clarke of when the mindless wolves offered their throats out of trust but that can't be the reason here. Clarke narrows her eyes, maybe it is just her imagination? Or can it be that because the tribe knew Lexa that they are being respectful? Some of them did wave to Lexa or call out a greeting and she willingly replies back to them,

"I know you have to be starving by now so we are going to stop by several food booths and then head over to the elders hopefully they are still telling stories," Lexa explains while turning left randomly kindly excusing herself when bumping into a male, the human looks slightly annoyed but then his gazes meet Clarke's and any form of protest that he might have said dies out. The male nods slightly before moving aside giving the pair a clear path, Lexa thanks him, and the male mutters something to Clarke but it is in that language she's barely begun to learn, what did forgive me omega mean? She thinks she picks up "me" but the other words made no sense to her.

"Food sounds really good, I hope it's not more vegetables Lexa, I won't eat it," Clarke answers, still intrigued by the fact that the humans aren't bumping or crowding her, it is bizarre, but at least she's feeling comfortable. Clarke is able to relax enough that not even her wolf mind protests though surprisingly her human mind insists that she be on alert. Her mind is restless, a small pain throbs at her temples like a headache is coming on as if she is trying to remember something but simply can't make the memory activate. Clarke shakes her head pressing at her temple to ease the pain, this ache must be coming from not eating enough,

Lexa laughs commenting something about her being silly, yet a red flowing object at a distance has caught her attention. Further away from where she and Lexa are walking, Clarke sees a large wooden stage, and upon it is some kind of chair that is made of twisted pieces of barks and sitting upon it is a female. The female is clothed down in some material that Clarke has seen before but she can't exactly remember where, though the long red cloth that drapes over her shoulder is stirring a feeling of déjà vu. The female is chatting with a male, who is offering her a basket filled with fruits, the female takes it with a smile before placing it to the side where a number of other gifts lay by her feet. Clarke notices there is a line of humans that each held onto some sort of present for the female, the gifts ranging from foods, trinkets, bottles, and even clothes.

Clarke titles her head as she spots a small gap in the line as there stood a young boy who also had white flowers decorated on him. The little one had jet black hair with bits of blonde mixed in his bangs, dark brown slanted eyes, and high cheekbones, he looked like his parents who stood behind him. The young boy is smiling ear to ear as he chats with his mom and the boy is eagerly jumping up and down. The mom is holding onto a gift that looked like maybe a wooden box? Clarke isn't sure, the little family looks rather happy, she wonders if it is the boys first time coming here as well. The boy's father suddenly looks up and glances around himself as if he felt Clarke's watchful eyes, she immediately looks away as the male's gaze neared her, Lincoln has told her many times that she shouldn't stare.

"Clarke? Babe?" She feels something warm pressing to her lips and Clarke snaps back into attention a little spooked that she might have been caught staring at some random humans. Clarke was going to defend herself that she was doing no such thing but then Lexa pushes something into her mouth and what meets her tongue nearly makes her purr. Clarke chows on the richest, mouth-watering, tender piece of meat she's ever had in her whole life, and she has not a single clue what animal it comes from. She licks at her lips savoring the lingering flavors, she hadn't even noticed she closed her eyes and once she opened them Lexa was holding out a stick with several pieces of meat pierced through them, "Spaced out on me there, huh?" Lexa laughs as she grabs Clarke's hand to take the stick, "What got your attention?"

"The female over there sitting in the weird chair, why's she getting gifts?" Clarke doesn't hesitate to tear into the offered meat, she lengthened her fangs just by a smidge in order to take off clearer pieces. She glanced up to take in the surroundings, she hadn't been paying attention to where they were going, merely trusting Lexa to guide. A little further back from where they stand there is a good-sized fire blazing away, the flames roasting a hunk of meat that rests on two large stomps. Tending to the meat is a male who stood off to the side cutting off several chunks before handing it to a child who then gave him a bracelet, "and what am I chewing on?" She questions continuing to eat,

"That is Heda, our commander, the gifts aren't for her though she only takes them momentarily. After the festive ends, Heda or her closet general collects all of the gifts and take them to the original origin that the village began and where Gaia supposedly visited," Lexa explains before directing Clarke to follow her since her hands are busy holding onto three more sticks like the one Clarke is eating from. "Uncle Nyko knows more about that, it's more of a fairy tale than being real from how I understand it, I'm sure Nyko wouldn't mind telling you. But one thing I know for sure is that the gifts reflect how Trikru has come a long way and we return something that we have borrowed from Gaia. It's the Trikru's way of saying thank you for allowing people to continue to live on her,"

"That's rather sweet, so here isn't the original place Becca began, Trikru?" Clarke continues to eat getting distracted a few times when they pace by new food places, some of them had the most heavenly scent like melted butter, minced garlic, fresh rosemary, and other foods that smell sweet but not nearly as bad like back in the ice cream house. The ice cream she had from the place was rather delicious but scenting every sugary item in the house was a slap to the muzzle,

"No, not at all, the place that Trikru began was in Ton DC good thousands of miles from here," Lexa hands Clarke the next stick after she finishes the first one, she doesn't hesitate to eat the next one, the rumbling in her belly is beginning to ache and she really needs to fill up.

"Are you giving a gift?" Clarke asks before stuffing her mouth again, she feels a small sensation like someone is watching them, Clarke cast a quick look around but found no eyes lingering on them, though she did see someone who looked an awful lot like Anya the distance made it difficult to know for sure and scenting her would be impossible. Whoever the look-a-like is the female has her back towards them and she was chatting with two gray-haired humans, the trio seemed like they were arguing and the male in the group cast a look Clarke's way when he saw her staring he quickly looked away.

"My grandparents typically give the gifts, my grandpa makes these beautiful welded flowers from extra sword pieces. Weapons are not allowed to be given as gifts to Gaia, it would be considered a threat," Lexa brought Clarke's attention back to her and she looked away from the trio who began walking further away. Clarke shrugs off the feeling that the trio may have been talking about her, it wouldn't be that surprising if they were talking about her since she is new here, "I have a few of the flowers here in my bag actually, my mom gave them to me so I can trade them for whatever we might like to get," Lexa pats the bag on her hip and Clarke honesty forget she had the thing with her even though she had been so curious earlier what was inside of it.

"Let me see, I never seen a flower made out of metal," Clarke hands the empty stick off to Lexa who keeps a hold of them in her free hand as she opens the bag. Clarke peaks inside, she saw quite a few small little flowers piled on top of each other but it was too dark to make out any details, she only catches the glare of the metal. Clarke reaches inside to pull one out, what comes out the bag is a thing that looks exactly like a poppy flower, the little thing could have been mistaken for the real thing if it wasn't so cold to the touch. Clarke turns the flower over in her hand, fascinated by the little thing she reaches up to trace the petals one by one.

"Can I have this one?" Clarke asks twirling the flower between her fingers watching as the light of the fire bounces off the metal. Clarke forgets about the last stick of meat she holds in her other hand before she can let it go to waste she tears off the last bit of meat before handing Lexa the empty stick, once they came across a small fire Lexa toss the sticks inside,

"Of course you can, here let me put it in your hair so you don't lose it," Lexa takes the flower and Clarke bends her head down giving Lexa the chance to weave the steam into her hair. Clarke grins more than happy to have something from this festival that will last her for years on end, maybe she could collect one for every time she came to the festival with Lexa. Once her love has the flower in the place, she and Lexa continue to visit most of the food stands and her female would trade the metal flowers for the meals, Clarke was happily getting full on every food, and not one of them tasted bad. Clarke's favorite food was still the first one that they went to, she learned from Lexa that the meat came from an ox and she adds that animal to the list of things that she plans to hunt down.

As soon as Clarke is merely content with the meats that fill her belly, Lexa then leads her towards the center of the crowd. Clarke takes a moment to search for the boy who is dressed in white flowers, but she sees no signs of him or his parents. Why she feels the urge to find the boy is uncertain, yet her wolf mind is insisting that she has to find him as if he is important. She huffs at the mere desire, what will she gain by finding this human male? The boy is just a boy and that is all, Clarke will not waste her time in finding him.

Lexa slows down suddenly and Clarke sees that they have reached the center and the elders are still telling stories. The humans that have gathered are sitting amongst the dirt or leaning against rocks, each one facing towards the east where an elder sits upon a wooden chair though this seat is rather plain compared to the commander's. Lexa scans the area choosing a spot that is further away from the rest of the humans probably because so many are occupying the space. Lexa explains how anyone is technically free to sit up front and share a story, though it is most traditional for an elder to share a tale from their lifetime. She sees amongst the humans that there are a good number of them who have their own flowers,

Clarke listens to Lexa as best as she can but her attention keeps getting pulled away (this whole damn festival has a lot of distractions) in the distance, there is a large boulder that a few humans are studying, some of them point at it and others move closer to look at the stone. Clarke grows more curious as she sees an elderly female carrying some bowls before handing them off to a few humans and she then gestures to the wall repeatedly. Clarke hears Lexa gasp mumbling a few words in her native tongue, but before Clarke has the chance to ask her what is wrong someone else begins to speak.

"Good evening young ones! How has the night treated everyone thus far?" The female speaks loudly but she speaks a bit odd, her English isn't smooth like Lexa's, Clarke has to force her attention away from the humans gathering around the boulder and look towards where an elder female has taken a seat. The elder's face is graced with a welcoming smile as she looks over the crowd, a few of the humans answer her question but the female gives them little focus as her gaze locks with Clarke's,

"What do we have here? A lady gifted with the jasmines, a newcomer to our fair tribe, have you been enjoying yourself?" The female's smile is kind but Clarke's good hearing can pick up on the edge in her tone. She observes the human closer, feeling as though she has seen this one before, the female's skin tone was the same as Indra's but a tad lighter, eyes a bright Hazel, and her hair longer curlier than Indra's. Clarke realizes that this human must be Lexa's grandma and that is why her lover is shaking her head and muttering something like, of course, she would do this,

"Yes ma'am, the festival has been rather fun so far, but we have been mostly visiting the food stands, each one has been delicious," Clarke answers speaking loud enough so that she may be heard, though she does tense a bit when most of the humans look their way, she moves closer to Lexa's side and squeezes the hand in her grip. The female nods still keeping the smile but her eyes do shot down to where Clarke holds Lexa's if she is not mistaken she senses some distaste,

"We give our thanks to Gaia for blessing us with these hunts, but you have only seen a fraction of our festival, you must see the rest to truly understand us. Whom is the funny looking thing that has brought you here?" The female smirks when Lexa scuffs, Clarke looks over to her and she is grinning right back, "you've caught yourself quite the looker, but is she daft? A creature cannot be blessed with both beauty and smarts," this time she speaks to Lexa directly and Clarke is more than certain that she must be family,

"Come now, don't be a brute, why not share your story and we can all talk after," Lexa is being playful but there is diffidently a firm tone to her voice as she addresses who Clarke can only assume is her grandma. The female's grin widens and several humans around them laugh, Clarke wants to know what she has said but doesn't get the chance to ask when she sees an elderly male approaching them and then taking a seat beside Lexa. Her lover's tribe sure seem to fancy her, they all seem to want her attention, Clarke may or may not be feeling bitter for being ignored but she isn't going to say anything because that would be selfish and she isn't a selfish wolf, but that doesn't stop her from letting out a frustrated growl,

"You best watch your tone, my son didn't raise a punk," the male turns to Lexa clearly speaking to her and Clarke is surprised to see her love lowering her head seeming to feel ashamed. Clarke glares at the male edging closer to Lexa if it is necessary to pull her love away from the potential threat. Though she shouldn't give the old man such credit, there is no way the male can actually be any type of threat to her, if it becomes necessary, she will shove the male right to the ground and keep him there.

"But she's deliberately trying to embarrass us! It's my girl's first time here and she doesn't do well with a lot of people paying attention to her," Lexa argues, Clarke looks back and forth between the pair completely lost, what the heck are they saying? The elder suddenly reaches over and flicks Lexa's forehead, her female jerks back and Clarke is about ready to give the male what he freaking deserves for even daring to touch Lexa, but then she squeezes her hand and shakes her head. Clarke wants to ignore the silent command but Lexa wouldn't have told her not to if it isn't for a good reason, with some effort she makes herself stay in place but she does pull Lexa closer to put some distance from the elder male, lucky old jackass,

"You know it's her way of welcoming your girlfriend, she may be willing to accept the girl but I am unsure, she doesn't fit into our tribe," the male grumbles as he looks over at Clarke and narrows his eyes, she glares back at him, what was this human's problem? Clarke's irritation is growing, she doesn't know what they are talking about but with the way that Lexa looks between her and the male it is clear they were talking about her, "how are we not sure that this girl will not be the same as those little barbarians that harmed you before?"

"She is nowhere close to being like them, she loves me. Give her a chance grandpa, she may surprise you, Clarke is like no one you'll ever meet," Lexa's voice pleads and for a moment she pulls away from Clarke to lay a kiss upon the male's cheek, she should have felt betrayed but the male does look like an older version of Gustus, and again she realizes that this one is family and obviously, Lexa is allowed to be affectionate with her family. She feels that bitter taste of jealousy scratching at her tongue, Lexa has so many family members while Clarke has none, she lets out a sigh trying to ignore the taste. Sharing Lexa with others seems to be something that Clarke will have to work on, she's never had to share someone before, normally Clarke gets all the attention that she wants with no trouble. She's made her peace with being fair about dividing Lexa's attention with Jam and Jelly though with those fur balls they have become rather attached to her.

She tries to think of when Raven first became her sister if she had been this jealous but the memories aren't clear. She reaches up to press at the side of her temple as it slowly throbs, it shouldn't be this hard to remember something so simple but that lifestyle was years ago and the only things that she can remember are dark. The only memories of the past that circle her mind are of the night her family was murdered, as well as the last time she heard Raven's desperate cry. She feels the urge to distance herself from Lexa and her grandpa, their relationship is making it difficult for Clarke not to be sour and they aren't even speaking to her. Clarke is tired of this conversation if anyone could call it one since it all sounds like plain gibberish to her. Lexa hasn't done this before, not include her in a conversation, maybe because it is with her family that she does not include Clarke.

Out of the blue Clarke hears the jingles of bells, like the ones that Jelly has on her collar, she searches for the source of the sound and it leads back to the boulder. The same elderly female from before stands in front of the large rock structure and in her hand, she shakes a stick with several bells on it as she waves goodbye to some humans. Clarke leans back trying to see past everyone to look at the boulder wanting to know what about the stone is catching the human's attention, she thinks she spots some splashes of colors but isn't sure.

The elder woman catches her staring and Clarke was going to look away but then the female grins and gestures for Clarke to come over. She glances around to see if the female means the invitation for someone else but no others are looking her way. When she looks back at the elder female, she seems to chuckle and gestures again to come over. Clarke's curiosity is getting the best of her, she definitely knows that, but for whatever reason, she really wants to see what is on that rock. Clarke checks on Lexa who is still chatting to her grandpa in that language of theirs and they haven't looked her way at all, too caught up in whatever they're talking about. Clarke figures that it will be fine for her to slip away and be right back before Lexa notices, it shouldn't take long. While the two continue to talk Clarke dismisses herself then heads towards the elder female who's smile widens as she approaches and thankfully the humans still keep their distance.

When Clarke makes it to the boulders she is stunned to see what looks like pictures engraved into the rough surface, but the pictures are glossy as if it is wet. Clarke can't help herself; she moves even closer, her nose tickling with the scents of fruits and brunt tree bark. The pictures on the rock differ from each other, some clearly made by a human pup based on the height which was a figure of what might be a deer? Or maybe a bear? Whatever it is supposed to be, the pup did an awful job at it, but there are other pictures that are far clearer. Clarke sees a fox with her kits gathered at her paws, the mother has a majestic orange/red coat while her kits still had their brown pelt; another picture not too far away is of an owl soaring through the wind its wings opened wide with colors mixed of browns and gold, and another picture is of a rabbit but it had antlers as if was a buck. Clarke marvels at each picture, they are beautiful, her fingers twitch feeling a sudden urge to reach out and trace the lines of each one.

"Aren't they beautiful? Everyone has been taking part in painting the walls, Alma would've been so proud," an elder female speaks to Clarke breaking her out of the trance as she had been drawn to the pictures. The female that spoke to her is the elder who had beckoned her over, the female is covered in splashes and smears of colors most of the mess is on her lower torso and Clarke can make out small handprints, but she doesn't seem to mind the mess, "would you like to try painting something as well? I'm sure I can help you find some space on here somewhere," Clarke tilts her head confused, these are not picturing but paintings? She hasn't seen anything like this but she does rather love these forms of pictures instead of the ones that are on Lexa's dresser,

"I have never painted anything before, how do you do it?" Clarke questions, she isn't going to turn down this offer it is much too tempting to be able to try something new. The female's smile is wide enough that it almost looks like that crazy cat from the TV and then the elder hurries off towards a table that has several of the odd-shaped bowls, she grabs several of them before coming back to Clarke and holding out a few of them for her to carry.

She notices a mark on the female's shoulder, it's a tattoo like the one Lexa has but this one has a beautiful flower curling around the Trikru symbol. The flower looks like a starburst... she's seen it before but where? Clarke feels a sharp ache strike at her temples like something was trying to come to the front of her mind but it was held back. She shakes the feeling off and ignores the small headache that throbs at her temples, Clarke smiles at the female as she takes the bowls in order to be helpful,

"Then you definitely should give it a try, it can be so freeing to draw something that has been circling around your mind or even to draw something you love," the older female gestures for Clarke to follow her as they walk around the boulder searching for a spot that is clear, "I am named Greta, what is your name?" She asks while looking over the boulder, they slowly make their way towards the back of the stone where there are more clear spots and there are continues to be enough fire torches to light up the path they walk along,

"My name is Clarke, it's nice to meet you, Mrs. Greta," she answers, she kind of laughs to herself that she willingly gives out her name now. There was a time that Clarke protected her name at all costs since it was the only thing from her past that wasn't taken from her. And it is thanks to Lexa that Clarke is able to be open and that it doesn't hurt to allow a few people to get to know her. Though Clarke still withholds a lot of things, she has troubles with trusting anyone, the only ones who know Clarke well enough are Lexa, Anya, and Lincoln. But if she was being truthful it is really only Lexa that has her complete trust since she is the only human that Clarke feels comfortable enough to tell everything,

"No need to be formal with me omega, I'm hardly at that level of respect," Greta looks over her shoulder still smiling but Clarke doesn't know what she has said, but the word omega has been muttered at her practically this entire evening, it is getting really annoying, "Where is your assigned alpha by the way? With all due respect, I hardly doubt the Wise Wolves would allow an omega to wander around alone," Greta pauses as she finds a bare spot on the wall and then places the bowls down on the ground, she turns to her when Clarke doesn't answer. Greta is waiting for her but obviously, Clarke can't do that when she has not a damn clue what she's said. Why have many of the Trikru tribes tried to talk to Clarke this way?

"I don't want to be rude but you need to stop talking to me in Trigedasleng, I don't understand you. So, if you're trying to talk to me can you please just say it in English?" Clarke huffs maintaining eye contact with the older female so that the message was clear, it may be wrong to be getting angry at this human. After all, it isn't her fault that most of these humans keep assuming that she is familiar with their language, plus she is wearing the damn flowers to show that she is a newcomer! Unless the white flowers that she has just mean something else like she is dating a Trikru member, but then that wouldn't explain the little boy's flowers,

"Look Lexa has barely started to teach me your language and for the majority of this evening people keep assuming that I know it," Clarke bites out, but her annoyance mainly stems from when Lexa and her grandpa were talking, it really just put her in a bad mood. Clarke isn't stupid, she knows they are talking about her, and having Lexa basically turn away to acknowledge the male was kind of hurtful. She nips at her lip to keep herself from growing bitter, she's not sure why she is feeling so greedy of Lexa today, this is her home, her family, Clarke needs to remember that, she can't be selfish when it comes to sharing her. Greta stares at her eyes wide and mouth parted, she looks frozen in place, not at all fazed that Clarke snapped at her,

"Lexa? As in the daughter of Indra and Gustus Woods? How can you possibly know her?" Greta stares at her clearly shocked that someone like Clarke could possibly know Lexa and her family. Clarke isn't happy with the tone of her voice and draws back her lips to flash her fangs in warning, she will not allow this human to downgrade her. This female is similar to those who have been casting wary glances at both she and Lexa, those humans seem to have an issue with their relationship,

"If you have to know Lexa is my m-girlfriend, why the sudden judgment? Is there a problem with that?" Clarke growls out softly, why does this tribe have such issues with her? The Trikru may have been respectful enough to keep their distance from her but that didn't stop them from judging Clarke as she stayed by Lexa's side. But it wasn't everyone, it was only the humans with the flower tattoo that judged them and many of their glances held confusion and even a few with anger.

Why? What is wrong with Clarke being here with Lexa? Can these humans tell that she feels weak amongst them? Or could they tell that she isn't equal to Lexa who is the most amazing human to ever walk this earth? Or did they know that she isn't brave enough to face them without having her love close by? Clarke claws at the palm of her hands, even though she's uncomfortable here she isn't going to voice the troubling feeling that stirs inside of her. Clarke feels like her human mind is taunting her for not paying closer attention to humans with the flower tattoo, the sane part of her mind was trying to warn her early on to be alert, but like an idiot she dropped her guard. She has to ask Lexa if she has noticed the judgments as well or if Clarke is just being paranoid,

"N-no, apologies Clarke, I haven't heard of Lexa having a girlfriend, she has never brought anyone to the festival, you must mean a lot to her," Greta smiles though she keeps her eyes cast down turning her head to the right and baring her throat like Molly would do when she annoyed Clarke. Normally she would move closer to press her snout against the offered flesh but this was a human, not a wolf. Greta could simply be looking away because she is embarrassed by how she acted, Clarke has seen Anya do it whenever she's asked a question that was too personal,

"I do and she means a lot to me too, I would be lost without her," Clarke takes a deep breath to calm down and turns back to the boulder to redirect her attention. Greta has chosen a rather clean spot for her to try this painting activity, Clarke looks down to the bowls she still carries honestly forgetting she's been holding onto them. She may be overreacting, about some of the Trikru members giving she and Lexa weird looks, she is in a new place that has been putting her on edge. Clarke sighs shaking her head before deciding to squats down to place the bowls on the ground and begins to look them over, each bowl holds a different color like red, blue, green, purple, orange, white, and black and each bowl has a different scent like flowers or fruits.

Before Clarke can second guess it she dips her fingers lightly into the black and purple and brings the mess of liquid closer to the light. She watches as the colors drip down her fingers then settle into her palm and the two colors twirl together in a spiral. Clarke closes her hand to mix the two and when she opens her hand, she finds a pretty midnight purple like the skies on a summer night. She isn't sure how she knows to do that but it feels so familiar, like she has done this once but Clarke has never come across paint, maybe the feeling is from another lifetime. Clarke keeps the mixed colors in her palm and starts to smear it across the blank rock in front of her. She feels her wolf and human mind pulling forward a memory, one that she hasn't forgotten but hasn't thought of in many years, it is of the time she spent a night under the stars with her family.

Clarke's fingers dip into the bowls again and she moves her fingers across the rough surfaces completely focused as she creatures the night sky as she remembers it. She whips off her hand on the dress before dipping her fingers in the paint again using white this time to make the stars and moon. Clarke can hear the murmurs of humans around her, their voices closer than before yet she is too focused on continuing to paint the stone, so she drowns them out.

She can't explain this feeling that takes over her, it feels so powerful and energetic, fueling her to keep gathering the paint on her fingers and to spread it over the boulder. Clarke feels the tickle of a hair on the cheek and brushes it back, she hardly notices that Greta has refilled the bowls as she keeps moving on. The image of her mom comes to her clear as crystal, her mom's shimmering white coat bright as the moon's light, her dad's fluffy fur a light brown with mixes of blonde, Raven's coat a dark brown but with mixed shades all throughout her coat, and then there is Clarke's coat a pure golden color she doesn't have any mixed colors in her fur like her dad's. Clarke slows down as the painting is almost complete, she only needs to add the lake and she will have finished creating her old home.

Xxxxxxx

Lexa POV

Lexa's heart nearly jumped out her throat when she hadn't found Clarke beside her, she'd been so busy trying to convince her grandpa Hakan to give her girlfriend a chance, that she didn't even notice when the hell Clarke slipped away. Lexa had been ready to properly introduce her grandpa and to apologize to Clarke for basically ignoring her but when she turned to her, she found the she-wolf missing. Lexa meant to take off immediately to find her, panicking that maybe Clarke is feeling overwhelmed and she had to step away because she failed to keep her safe. But Lexa didn't get far before her grandpa stopped her and pointed towards the caves where Greta loves to invite people to paint.

Grandpa Hakan reassured her that Clarke had gone off towards Greta some time ago but Lexa couldn't see Clarke or Greta. Lexa would feel a lot more at ease if she could see that Clarke is actually there but grandpa lectured her about not being rude by running off while grandma Chilam is sharing a story. Only because Lexa finally made a breakthrough with her grandpa did she decide to stay put, she didn't want to offend either of her grandparents in case it may put them in a bad mood.

Lexa cooperates by listening to the same story she's heard a thousand times but she keeps glancing over towards the cave where more and more people are gathering towards the back, which really wasn't a good sign for Clarke. She knows very well that Clarke doesn't enjoy crowds, they make her nervous, put her on edge, and she instinctively becomes protective of herself but when Lexa is right beside her the tension lessons. Lexa keeps wondering why in the world Clarke would willingly wander off when she has this fear of crowds, what is it about painting that could interest her girlfriend to take on a crowd of people? She thinks over if Clarke has ever encountered art before, but surprisingly Lexa can't think of a single incident that her girlfriend has experienced and Clarke is a wolf with so little life experience that of course she be drawn to something new.

"You keep looking at the cave Lexa, I never imagine you to be the clingy one," Grandpa Hakan spooks Lexa, not even noticing that she is looking towards the cave again. Lexa blushes turning away from where people continue to gather thinking maybe everyone is crowding around because Greta is painting. Clarke must be having an incredible time to be able watch the master work out her creations, Greta is remarkable at making almost every kind of art. Lexa finds such peace whenever she has watched Greta paint, like the time that she had come over to her house and made the family portrait. Greta had once tried to show her how to be crafty but Lexa has zero talents to be able to make anything fancy like the elder,

"I'm not clingy, I'm just a little worried, Clarke has an issue with being around a lot of people," Lexa defends, she's tapping her foot on the ground an old habit from when she gets anxious, she pinches the sides of her knee to stop and takes a deep breath to calm down. Maybe she is being too clingy, it isn't a bad thing that Clarke has ventured off on her own, it's actually good for her, so why does her chest feel so tight? Lexa worries that she may be too protective of her girlfriend, it isn't as though she's weak, well physically she is not but mentally Clarke is defenseless. She hears the applause of the crowd and Lexa looks up to see her grandma Chilam has finished her tale and is making her way over.

"Where have the las gone? Has she grown tired of you already?" Her grandma sweeps down to pull Lexa in for a deep hug then kisses her forehead repeatedly. Lexa ignores when she hears the tribe around them start to poke fun if she chooses to react then her grandma will be even worse, something that the elder has definitely taught her daughter,

"She's wandered off to the cave Grandma, I am actually thinking that both of you should come with me so that I may introduce you to my girlfriend properly," Lexa pulls back enough to at least kiss her grandma's cheek so that she may stop embarrassing her as she so loves to do.

"Yes! I must meet the girl that has managed to earn your trust to be able to be here," Grandma doesn't even wait to see if Grandpa is ready to go before, she grabs a hold of Lexa's hand and pulls her to her feet. Lexa barely gets her legs working beneath her to keep up with her grandma as she begins guiding them towards the cave. Lexa sighs thinking it best to allow her grandma to treat her like a child if only so they may get to Clarke sooner. The feeling in Lexa's chest won't lighten up, it feels so weighted and her heart keeps hurting, there's something in her that just keeps making Lexa worry,

"What is Clarke's history? Who are her parents?" Grandpa has made it to their sides keeping up with them as Grandma hurries along with Lexa in tow. She glances at him thinking of what would be the best answer, the truth is out of the question, but a complete lie will only bite back at her in the end. She looks away, knowing she has already clued her grandpa that something is at a miss, but what choice does she have? Lexa can't tell her family the truth about Clarke, it wouldn't be right to expose her girlfriend like that, plus she'd be betraying Clarke's trust in her which is something Lexa worked really hard to earn,

"I can't tell you everything because that wouldn't be fair to Clarke but I will say that she's been through a lot. Clarke's parents died a long time ago and she grew up in the foster care system with never once being adopted," Lexa lies, (or least parsley lied) her gut twists at the words she has to say in order to keep Clarke's identity safe, it's the same lie she's given to her parents and she needs to keep up with the story that they have made up. Lexa feels her grandma's grip twitch and squeezes down on her hand but she keeps walking on putting up a brave face. She glances at her grandpa's face who unlike her grandma shows the pain he feels on Clarke's behalf, a sadness reflects in his eyes as he looks to Lexa,

"Poor child, a life that you thankfully never had to endure but for this girl to have to been through such a thing must have created a deep pain within her," Grandma's voices crack like she is holding back a sob, though the pain her grandma feels isn't really for Clarke it is more so that she doesn't want to imagine Lexa has come close to that lifestyle, she shakes her head tugging on Lexa to move faster. "We must be kind Hakan, to be cruel to one who has suffered would upset the goddess herself," Lexa looks to see what her grandpa has to say but the man has fallen silent and only nods his head yet it is obvious that he is turning his thoughts over,

"Thank you, but don't pity her, Clarke is incredibly strong-willed, she doesn't let anyone put her down and she'll always be straightforward with you even if it can come across as rude," Lexa laughs remembering the many times that Clarke has said things that really should have been kept to herself, but her bluntness is something that Lexa admires in an odd way. Maybe the reason that she loves her girlfriend's bluntness is because she knows that she will never bullshit her, unlike how so many people who seem to have the habit of lying to her but not her family of course.

She and her grandparents have finally arrived at the cave but now they have to weave through the crowd that has gathered. "Greta must really be doing an amazing job but what in the world is she making to have this many people here?" Lexa questions while trying to glance over people's heads to see the elder's work,

"She could be doing a demonstration, Greta adores being able to show the young ones how to paint rabbits and such," Grandpa adds as he asks several people to please allow them through, Lexa keeps an eye out for ahead of golden hair, searching the crowd for any hints of Clarke. She isn't having any luck and all these people certainly aren't helping, Lexa wishes she had Clarke's sense of smell, she 'd be able to find her in seconds. She at least doesn't feel as anxious as earlier, the small weight in her chest has lessened and she feels some sort of pull closer to the cave rather than the back. Lexa not sure why she does it but she moves forward now guiding her grandma to follow her instead, she moves between people having no problems getting closer towards the overly large rock structure.

Lexa finally breaks through to the front of the crowd and what she sees makes her jaw drop. Before Lexa's very eyes is an artwork that might as well be photograph because it is so lifelike and she knows the landscape it is based off of because she has been there. Lexa has seen this land with her own two eyes in the dead of night while she had been comforting her girlfriend whose history she had finally learned. Lexa had laid beneath the night sky watching the different hues of lights that painted the night, stars by the millions spread wide, and a crescent moon luminous enough to lighten the forest around them.

Lexa feels like she's been transported right to that very place, but what isn't familiar in this painting are three wolves; a large pure white wolf lays on their belly and between its paws is a pup: the white wolf is nipping at the pup's fur and besides one of the wolf's paw is a small pile of brown fur: the little brown pup is laying on their back batting at the white's snout baring its fangs in "threatening" way: leaning on the white wolf's shoulder is a milk chocolate colored wolf and along its spine, there is a blonde mix of fur. The milk chocolate wolf is looking to the skies and on his shoulder is a very familiar golden furred pup: the golden pup is standing on the chocolate one's shoulders using its head as a booster as if she is trying to reach the stars.

When Lexa is finally able to take her eyes away from the art she is expecting to see Greta but instead, she finds Clarke and she looks like a disaster. Her girlfriend's once beautiful dress is now smeared in paint mostly on her left side of the hip and she's even managed to get some on her face and hair. If this was anyone normal, they would have whined and complained about being such a mess yet Clarke is looking down at the paint with the biggest smile. Lexa is startled when Greta rings the bells the old timely tradition to signal Alma that someone has made another art tribute in her name, Lexa also catches Clarke jump in place having been scared as well, she laughs under her breath.

"Lexa, this las will put Greta out of business! She is an incredible artist, how have you not told us about her talent?" Grandma shouts like she can't believe her eyes and the mentioning of her name causes Clarke to look their way, Lexa grins immediately as her girlfriend comes running towards them. People were smart enough to move out of the way when they saw her coming,

"You have to see what I made Lexa! I am so proud of myself!" Clarke grabs a hold of her hand quickly and pulls her away from her grandparents, the she-wolf too excited to be able to tell that Lexa has company. "Greta has shown me what art is and she encouraged me to try it out, I have never done this before but I think it came out pretty good," Clarke talks on not even aware that so many other people are watching them though most of the crowd is starting to thin out, which would really be in their benefit. Lexa sees Greta admiring the artwork from the side as she cleans up the mess of paints and gathering the stone bowls. Greta sees Lexa and offers a small wave despite having her hands so full, she nods to her to acknowledge the elder before her attention is pulled back to Clarke,

"I could see it from back there, you're an amazing artist, I never knew you could do something like this," Lexa squeezes her hand she can see her grandparents following after them though a few paces behind, they are whispering to each other Lexa isn't able to make out anything they are saying. Since the pair seem to be busy with their own talk, she figures it be safe enough to ask "This is your family isn't?" Lexa whispers only for Clarke's ears to hear, she feels the slights twitch but her good behavior doesn't fade,

"Yes, this white one is my mom, the light brown wolf is my dad, and that furball is my older sister, Raven," Clarke stars at her work a sad smile at her lips but the pain that reflects in her eyes isn't the same heartbreaking sight like Lexa has seen in the past. She steps closer to Clarke wrapping a protective arm around her waist and holds her tight, "I wish you could have met them, Lexa, my mom would have given you such a hard time, I bet she would have wanted you to prove that you had the strength and heart to be my mate," Clarke laughs before she pulls Lexa in for a hug squeezing her as if her life depended on it, "my dad would have treated you with such care and wanting to constantly feed you," She shields her face in Lexa's neck and she feels a few drops of tears running on her skin, "he'd probably say some nonsense about you needing to be fat to be able to bare healthy chubby pups," Clarke laughs again, even though she is crying a little her tone of voice doesn't change,

"If you want, I can still prove myself to your mom, what would I have to do?" Lexa kisses the top of Clarke's head now realizing that the paint on her dress isn't completely dry and is more than likely staining her clothes, thank Gaia that this stuff comes off with a good wash. Clarke pulls away as she cleans off the tears and meets Lexa's eyes, she reaches out and grabs her cheeks in both her hands. Lexa doesn't mind the affectionate touch but she definitely feels the cold wetness of paint that will likely stain her cheek,

"Nothing, you have already proven yourself worthy to be my mate, in fact, you surpass me in how incredible you are," Clarke pulls her down for a gentle kiss and she melts into the she-wolf, this wolf could charm Lexa into doing anything and she'd be willing to do it all. She doesn't even care that her own clothes and skin is getting all messy from the paint that stuck to her girlfriend. Lexa pulls back a little to lay another kiss on Clarke's forehead grinning when she hears the quietest purr,

"I love you, I hope you know that you are equally as amazing," Lexa whispers back she hears someone clear their throat, she sighs knowing that she has made her grandparents wait longer than necessary, "come on babe, I want you to meet my grandpa and grandma," Lexa sneaks another quick kiss to Clarke's forehead before pulling away and turning towards the pair, she sees them both look over Clarke, that is simply something that Lexa well need to be used to even thought it still tends to bug her, "Clarke please meet my grandpa Hakan on my father's side and my grandma Chilam on my mother's side,"

"It's a pleasure to meet you both," Clarke steps away from Lexa to extend a hand in greeting, her grandpa doesn't take the handshake instead he is looking over Clarke's scars more specifically at the one around her throat but grandma Chilam has the good senses to step up and take the offered hand,

"Likewise dear, you'll have to excuses Hakan the old man never bothered to learn how to speak English but he understands you," grandma greets Clarke respectfully unlike how her daughter had treated Clarke when they meet though she can't give her grandma too much credit since the elder is purposely looking over the scar on Clarke's wrist. When her grandma tries to trace the mark, her girlfriend pulls her hand away and hides it behind her back and gives the elder a glare for trying to touch where she shouldn't. Clarke is smooth enough to move her attention to Lexa's grandpa and she smiles kindly choosing to ignore when her grandma huff in annoyance,

"That's good to know, why haven't you learned to speak English?" Clarke asks casually like he was potentially a friend, Lexa cringes when her grandpa frowns, his has always been a stickler for proper behavior,

"If you must know, I believe it more honorable to speak in my native language rather than the language of those that demand all must speak the same way. A shame you haven't learned to speak our language, most of those interested in dating a Trikru member have the decency to at least learn the basics," Grandpa nods his head to Lexa to translate, she sighs not wanting to get into this, so much for hoping that he will be kinder at least he hasn't started complaining about why Lexa won't choose someone from the tribe to marry, at least not yet. Lexa does a quick translation (though intentionally leaving out the last bit) so Clarke may know what's been said and the she-wolf only nods though Lexa knows well enough that she wants to ask more questions,

"Never you mind him las, this bitter prune has such high expectations of those who want to be involved in our family," Grandma smiles wide when the man scuffs ready to tell the woman off but he doesn't get the chance as she continues with saying, "just be yourself, dear, no lies and no tricks then you'll surely win the hearts of our family," Grandma Chilam is being entirely serious of course, what else can Lexa expect? She feels guilty at the reminder of the lies she and Clarke have had to come up with, Lexa just knows she'll disappoint her family if those lies are ever brought into the light. Clarke moves back and presses into Lexa's side, she's pretty sure that her girlfriend is feeling the same,

"I will always be who I am, no one gets to change that, but sometimes a sweet lie is better than the bitter truth," Clarke suddenly smacks at Lexa's butt and before she can ask what the heck's she's doing Clarke is pulling out her phone, "Lexa please take a picture of my painting, Greta says when the rain comes in the following days it will wash away and I want a memory of this," Clarke fiddles with the phone trying to remember how it works as her grandparents' star at Clarke curiously, Lexa is afraid this may spark an argument but surprisingly that resentment doesn't come,

"You definitely should capture this moment, though you should know technology isn't allowed to be used during the festival, it's disrespectful, to use any modern items during this time is to say that we do not appreciate the gifts that Gaia has given us," grandpa speaks up but his tone isn't rude it's actually gentle, Lexa quickly translates what he has said and she feels sad at how Clarke's happy attitude deflates a little, she is pretty sure that she has mentioned this beforehand or maybe she gotten so excited that it may have slipped her mind to tell Clarke about the basic rules when it came to the festival,

"I'm sorry, I didn't know that, I'm still learning your culture," Clarke makes to hand Lexa's phone back but then Grandpa Hakan raises a hand to signal her to stop, Lexa wonders if he's about to mock Clarke for not knowing more about the Trikru but Lexa is taken completely by surprises with what he says next,

"However, no one in our tribe has ever seen someone like yourself paint such exquisite art, I suppose a few photos should do no harm," Grandpa Hakan gestures towards Clarke's art and Lexa is too stunned to translate, her grandpa absolutely hates technology the old man constantly lectures how the forms of electronics degrade the mind each and every day and poison the way people ought to live. Last year he'd sooner chuck Lexa's phone into a fire pit rather than let her be on it, yet here he is giving Clarke the chance to take a freaking picture. Grandma Chilam thankfully translates what he says sparing Lexa from having to do, Clarke smiles at him before she grabs Lexa and guides her back to the cave. Grandma also reminds them that the hunting will begin soon and they shouldn't take long,

"We definitely need to hurry, I don't want to miss the hunt, that is like the only thing that doesn't need to be explained to me," Clarke has cleverly managed to turn on her phone since it was shut off before she and her family came into the festival square. Though the equipment is still all too new to Clarke and she often struggles to figure it out, she hasn't figured out how to use the basics yet. She pressing at the screen repeatedly remembering Lexa's passcode but doesn't know how to get to the camera,

"You're really something special, you know that Clarke? Pass me the phone baby, I'll take a picture of you in front of your work," Lexa takes the phone once it's handed to her, she keeps the phone low so Clarke may watch how to get to the camera. Clarke hums to herself likely making a mental note to repeat what Lexa did then she hurries off to stand in front of her work. The she-wolf stands beside the painting already smiling and just to be plain silly Clarke stick out her tongue at Lexa while she snaps a few pictures. Lexa stifles a laugh to make sure she takes clear images while Clarke changes the poses here and there, she can hear her grandparents chatting softly as though they don't want to be heard.

"This wolf is different, she is not like the others well maybe similar to the outcasts, but still even then she behaves oddly, why?"

"The way she was raised must have something to do with it or maybe it is a lie that she has told to Lexa to believe,"

"But Anya has told us that this Clarke is true and pure-hearted, we are seeing this with our own eyes. I don't see a wolf who wants to control and command, this one isn't like the other alphas,"

"I know, I have the same feeling, but if Anya has spoken the truth and we trust what we feel from this alpha, are we willing to accept that the lies we have told Lexa will all be broken?"

"I don't know! This is larger the-"

Lexa can't stop herself from grinding her teeth, her grandparents were doing that damn again, speaking in the very first forms of Trigedasleng. The language is so old that there are two forms of it, the very first one that can be traced back to Becca's timeline and the second is the modern one that's spoken today which has been changed and altered from the first form. The two forms of language are very different from one another that even Lexa can barely pick up a few words.

Only a selected group of people in Trikru know the first form by heart and those people's genetics can be traced back all the way to the first commander time, and solely those people are allowed to know it. The Lunar Trikru members have the privilege of learning the language and they get the honor of being tattooed with not only their symbol but also the rare lunar flower. Lexa holds some resentment towards that part of her culture because she isn't permitted to have the lunar flower or learn the older language because of her adoption, even though her grandparents, parents, and best friend have gotten those honors. When she was younger, Lexa desperately wanted to learn more of the Lunar Trikru but any time she asked to be taught about it everyone has refused to tell her anything. As the years went on Lexa had to ignore that part of her culture since she wasn't allowed to be involved, so she's spaced it out, and only at rare times is she reminded of the Lunar group.

Lexa didn't think that this would still be such a bitter thing for her, she thought she had grown out of that phase since her family never acted like they were better than her. In fact, her family does their best to not mention the Lunar group around her because they do not want to hurt her feelings. Lexa scolds herself for falling back into that habit, she has to remember that the only reason that she doesn't get to be a Lunar member is that she is not blood-related to the first commander timeline, that's it, it is not like Lexa is any less part of the family.

"Lexa? What's wrong?" Clarke is in her face in a blink of an eye, Lexa flinches back having been so lost inside her memories she didn't even notice that Clarke had moved. Clarke is looking around them trying to find whatever thing might have caused Lexa to zone out. She looks back to her grandparents and doesn't find them there, they may have headed to her mom's stand. Usually, the elders sit out the hunt so that the younger people may hunt to their heart's content. Lexa resists rolling her eyes, thinking it would have been nice if her grandparents had at least spoken up to say they were leaving,

"Nothing babe, I just remembered that we need to get some dried bison meat for Lincoln, he really likes the stuff," Lexa laughs to play off her sudden blank out moment, the lie came too easily and it bites at her gut because she has just lied to Clarke. But Lexa can't bring herself to tell the truth, at least not here, this part of her culture isn't something that Lexa was ever allowed to be a part of and it sings like hell to be excluded. Lexa understands why of course and she accepts the simple facts but that didn't mean she liked it, plus it's something that she has purposely pushed out of her mind in order to not think about,

"I'd offer to hunt a fresh one for him but I haven't had any luck finding bison, anyways your grandpa and grandma said they won't be joining us in the hunt but they did ask that we find them several rabbits," Clarke filled her in, she started to tug at her dress where the paint has already dried up, "Can I take off this dress? It's gotten heavy with all this paint stuff plus it is impossible to hunt in," Clarke yanks some of the dried paint off and lets the piece fall to the ground, she swings side to side getting anxious to get moving, Lexa's cheeks color red and she chuckles shaking her head,

"Babe you can't change forms, it is way too risky, you'll have to hunt in the form you're in now and I don't have any spare clothes for you," Lexa looks around making sure that no one else is close enough to hear them, thankfully everyone is doing their own thing far too busy to take notice of them. Clarke visibly sages, obviously disappointed, her bottom sets out in a pout,

"But I'm not a strong hunter like this, I need my true form to be able to hunt something really good, what if we went way further out?" Clarke argues already heading towards the east side of the forest, Lexa quickly walks over to her and guides her towards the north, the east side won't have many animals due to the weather change. She figures Clarke may be too excited to remember that simple detail,

"Can you maybe do a half form? Full-on wolf around a tribe that can track a bear down from miles away would be a really bad idea," Lexa loops an arm around her waist pulling Clarke close to nuzzle her cheek, she earns a smile giggle and kisses to the nose, the she-wolf hums considering the offer as they blindly head deeper into the woods.

"Will when you put it like that it wouldn't be smart to do even halfway, fine I'll hunt in this form just to be safe," Clarke sighs, she keeps heading forward stepping on small branches and kicking up leaves instead of picking up feet to avoid doing so, she is alerting small animals that they are passing through, Lexa pauses watching as Clarke continues to be rather clumsy. Lexa wonders if maybe Clarke is simply choosing to be reckless because she has been denied going into her wolf form and is throwing a small tantrum, so Lexa chooses not to say anything and continues to walk on beside the she-wolf.

Xxxxx

Thirty minutes into the hunt and a good four miles away from the tribe and it has been made obvious to Lexa that Clarke is not having a tantrum, this is literally how she hunts. Lexa now understands why her girlfriend has been losing weight. She has noticed that Clarke has been looking thinner since the fall weather began, Lexa didn't know the best way to approach the subject without offending her girlfriend so instead of talking things out Lexa has been making extra meat-filled dishes. Clarke would eat each dish too but the meat in them wasn't nearly enough for her, Lexa knows that the she-wolf has been fed by people most of her life and Lexa doesn't want to give off the same impression. She tries to give Clarke all the space she needs to be an ordinary wolf but with the weight that the she-wolf is losing it's going to affect her health. Clarke needs to gain a lot more weight in order to survive the winter when hunting becomes even harder, she needs fat so that she loses weight it won't take a toll on her life.

Lexa is now faced with a difficult decision of telling her werewolf girlfriend that she is not the best hunter, a wolf who is very prideful and doesn't tolerate when Anya or Lincoln like to tease about her nature, but of course, she doesn't think Clarke will hurt her in any way but still. Lexa needs to find a careful smooth way of showing Clarke how to hunt because all she does to find some prey is sniff at the air, tilt her head towards any new sounds, and then out of nowhere, she takes off running. This is just what her girlfriend has done though she comes back with a small bird, who thankfully is still alive from the sounds of distress it's letting out.

"I'm pretty sure this thing wouldn't impress your family huh?" Clarke asks holding out the bird by its little legs, the poor thing flapping its wings as furiously as it can, trying desperately to scare the hunter that caught them. Lexa fights the urge to snap at Clarke for treating an innocent animal this way, it's one of the many reasons she gave up eating meat, plus she can't get mad at Clarke for following what is natural for her, "but I did catch it in mid-air! It was carrying some twigs for some reason," Clarke grins widely and Lexa can see that all of her teeth have sharpened, the excitement of catching the bird must have brought them out,

"That's a rather impressive babe but we normally bring back animals that can feed more than one person," Lexa moves closer, gentle stopping the bird from flapping its wings before they can injure themselves, she tugs a little but Clarke keeps a hold on the bird's legs, "plus if this bird is grabbing small branches it means they are building a nest for their babies," at the word baby Clarke immediately let's go and allows Lexa to check the bird for any severe wounds (there's is none) before she opens her hands and the bird takes off like a buzzer.

"I hate this form, I can't hunt anything down," Clarke growls out taking her frustration out on a nearby tree by using her claws, Lexa flinches at seeing how easily Clarke's claws cut into the tree like it's plato, she glances around while Clarke claws at the tree again trying to find any type of tracks that Lexa can guide the she-wolf to follow. This is not the first time that Clarke let out her anger in an aggressive way, earlier when she missed catching a rabbit, she kicked at a rock hard enough to merge it into the bark of a tree. Lexa has seen many sides of her girlfriend, typically only the sweet teddy bear that she can be (not including the first-time meeting Lincoln) so seeing Clarke when she is frustrated is new but Lexa finds this a semi better alternative to bottling up her emotions. Once they are home, she and Clarke well need to find a way for the she-wolf to express her frustration in a healthier way than to just tear things apart. Lexa thanks the heavens that she spots some deer tracks just a little way to the left of where they are,

"Can I show you how I used to hunt?" Lexa moves up and grabs Clarke's arm before she swings at the bark again the poor tree looks like it may break in half. Clarke snaps her head in her direction, eyes having lightened in color making the yellow in Clarke's eye flash like a glare. Lexa keeps a calm expression, not wanting to alert her, she slides a hand down to Clarke's arm to grab a hand and kiss each knuckle. She smiles as she watches Clarke take a deep breath in then lets it out slowly and with it, she retracts the claws. The she-wolf stares back at Lexa for a few moments, trying to settle her nerves and as she does, Lexa gets to see how Clarke's eyes return to royal blues.

"Alright, maybe I can learn a few pointers huh?" Clarke laughs but the pitch in her voices gives away how discouraged she feels. Lexa brings a hand up to cup her chin and guides the she-wolf to meet her eyes. She feels confident enough to say that she knows Clarke better than anyone else in this world, Lexa can guess the types of thoughts that are swarming in her mind. She's more than likely thinking of how disgraceful it is that Clarke is not able to hunt properly, blaming herself for something completely out of her control. Lexa leans in to press a kiss to Clarke's lips and as soon as she does the she-wolf wraps her arms tightly around her, Clarke pulls away from the kiss to hide her face in the hollow base of Lexa's neck.

"Do you want to talk about it now?" Lexa rubs a hand up and down Clarke's spine, smoothing the small storm that must be brewing in her head. Clarke quickly shakes her head even letting out a small snarl in protest, "Then we talk about this later once we are back at my parent's house, you don't get better if you don't talk about it remember?" Lexa kisses Clarke's temple and squeezes her with all the force that she is able to, Clarke hesitates for a few moments but does eventually nod. They stand that way for a little swaying side to side while Lexa continues to repeatedly kiss the side of Clarke's face and Lexa grins when the she-wolf purrs lowly,

Once Clarke has calmed down and Lexa checks her eyes to be sure that she is in fact at ease, Lexa shows Clarke how to hunt. She first guides the she-wolf to check the landscape and see if she can spot any difference, Lexa doesn't give her the answer because she wants Clarke's confidence to build up, it takes a few minutes but eventually, her attention goes to where Lexa wants them. Lexa takes her hand to pull her over to the trail and has Clarke mimic her by crouching down to be able to see the ground better, though Clarke's eyesight is superior then her own and Clarke sees the deer's hooves in a snap. Lexa can tell that she wants to take off running as soon as Clarke takes a sniff but she keeps a hold of her hand and explains why charging forward is not the best move. Clarke's cheeks burst with red but she nods her head making no arguments, Lexa decides to lead the way while Clarke follows after. She keeps clear of any branches that can snap under her weight and she smiles to herself when the she-wolf does the same, even avoiding to kick up the loose leaves,

They don't speak the rest of the way as they follow the tracks, Lexa can't help but think of a mother wolf and how she would show her pups to hunt, it feels odd that she is the one to show a grown wolf. She thinks of Clarke's painting, remembering the white wolf whose eyes were brown like glazed honey, in the painting only Lexa can tell that the wolf was a force to be reckoned with. She imagines how the white wolf would have lead her little golden pup to stay close and be silent as the forest around them, that wolf should be the one teaching Clarke but instead, she has to learn from her, a human who's a vegetarian,

Lexa bites her lip to keep herself from letting out a sigh, it truly pains her heart that Clarke has been deprived of that lifestyle all because one shit face who wanted to make money. She grinds her teeth remembering all too well who is responsible for that misfortune, Finn Collins a good for nothing jackass who needs to be behind bars. Anya has been the one to step up and try to find the man, having reached out to the tribe and warned them of what he is up to but the man has somehow vanished off the map. There has been no illegal hunting lately which made it rather difficult to even find him. All the same though, once Finn comes out of hiding Lexa is sure that her tribe will help to take him down and have him pay for his crimes. The next problem to solve would be dealing with Nia who is already being watched over but she is tricky to pin down for her crimes since she has papers and money to force people to turn a blind eye. Nia hasn't even bothered to lay low; she continues her business like usual the only change that she has done was decreed the use of fur in her products, rather unusual considering her product lines. Lexa shakes her head to knock away the thoughts of the vile woman and focus on the present.

She tunes back into the world then checks the tracks, she can tell by the marks alone that the deer isn't far away. Lexa glances back at Clarke seeing how the she-wolf is actually focused on something in the right direction in front of them, she checks as well but her sight can't pick up whatever has caught her attention, it's not as though she may ask what it is or else they will scare the deer away. What Lexa can see though is the deer they have been tracking, she smiles right away then reaches back to grab Clarke's hand and pull her down to be out of view. Clarke looks away from where she had been looking and Lexa points towards the deer that is currently grazing on grass. The she-wolf definitely sees the deer and Lexa can bluntly see how much she wants to give chase but instead, Clarke just whines softly before looking back to where she had been previously,

"Why aren't yo-" Lexa's words get caught off as Clarke's lungs forward to cover her mouth and with it she feels the familiar tingle at her forehead. Clarke forces them to the ground and the she-wolf presses her whole body over Lexa as if it is enough to shield her,

"Don't say anything, there's a mindless wolf here and it probably just wants the deer, so we need to stay low," Clarke does speak to Lexa but her attention is purely focused on the right direction, once Lexa nods to convey that she won't talk Clarke removes her hand. She wishes that she had the ability to communicate like Clarke so that way they both could be on the same page. Lexa turns around to find the wolf that Clarke has spotted and is surprised as a wolf creeps out of the tall grass, "I think I have seen this wolf before, it looks familiar," Lexa glances at her girlfriend as she slowly moves closer to looms over her, but in this form, Clarke is too small to completely cover her.

"Wow, yeah it definitely is the same one, why the heck is she all the way out here?" Lexa doesn't pay much attention to what Clarke has said as the wolf comes into full view far too curious to observe a wolf in the wild. Compared to Clarke's wolf form this one is half her size or maybe even smaller, its fur coffee brown with bits of silver a detail that says the wolf is older, the wolf oddly has one paw where the fur is lighter like pale sand, yet that isn't what strikes Lexa as the weirdest thing because this mindless wolf has one yellow and one gray eye.

Notes:

I know this is technically a cliff hanger but trust me when I tell you I could have made it a LOT more intense but choose to move into a different route. Can't promise when there will be an update, I am already writing the next chapter but this one REALLY needs to be smooth so it will take time, so please be patient with me :D
Thank you to everyone that has been so kind and patient with me, I hope the wait was worth it, let me know which parts were your favorite! I'm always happy to hear what you guys think :)
(Small hint for everyone that might have missed it, concerning the one yellow eyed wolf, think of chapter 4-Clarke's flashback and chapter 9—teddy bear)
Love ya lots and pretty please won't you be sweet enough to leave me a treat?
-YuriWolf