Welcome back to the one-shot collection!
So this was requested by a Guest reviewer, asking for an argument out of Pluto that ''gets out of hand'' and boy, did it get out of hand! Enjoy!
Disclaimer: don't own
''Sangomom, I want you to disown Hayami.''
The keeper looks up from the training menu he is inspecting and merely stares at Hamano for a few seconds. The midfielder stares back without hesitation, completely serious.
''Hamano,'' says Sangoku slowly, and the younger boy tilts his head, ''I… honestly don't know what to say. I can't 'disown' Hayami because we're not family and even if we were, why would I do that?''
The midfielder huffs. ''You nag so much, you might as well be the team's mother,'' he mutters. Unfortunately for him, Sangoku hears it and shoots him a murderous glare, which the younger teen simply waves away. ''Anyway, Hayami should be disowned because he said it's good Pluto isn't a planet anymore.''
Someone chokes.
''Disown him,'' mutters Kurama.
Sangoku shoots him a Look, with capital L, but any other reaction is prevented when the sliding doors of the clubroom open and Hayami arrives.
The maroon-haired teen pauses when he sees half of his team glare at him, while the other half looks exasperated – not that that's surprising, it's pretty much their default state by now – and as his eyes stray to Hamano, realization crosses his face.
He sighs.
''For the record, I only mean that it's logical Pluto isn't considered a planet, because there is no scientific justification for it to be one.''
His teammates – the ones actually picking sides, that is – only seem to get angrier at that.
Hayami sighs again, accepting his fate and placing his bag by the lockers. Then he moves towards one of the benches and sits down, pushing up his glasses. ''Look, first of all, it's out in the Kuiper Belt, along with millions of other chunks of ice and rock. Second of all, there are bigger things in the Kuiper Belt, so why shouldn't those be considered planets if Pluto is considered one? And it's impossible to call everything there a planet, because there are too many, and the word would lose its meaning.''
Sangoku is inclined to give in to that logical explanation. His friends… not so much.
''I DON'T CARE!'' cries Hamano, pointing a shaky finger at his best friend. ''You're a traitor to me, Haya! How could you?! I trusted you!''
Hayami is starting to look a little uncomfortable – only a little, though, which isn't very surprising, considering the amount of time he spends with the other midfielder. ''H-Hamano, come on, I'm just-''
''I don't want to hear it, you traitor!''
Hamano turns away from his, perhaps former, best friend. Hayami stares at him for a few seconds and then glances at his other teammates, shrinking away when he notices the glares shot his way.
Sangoku, seeing it too, frowns. ''Come on guys, you're being unreasonable-''
''No, Sangomom!'' protests Hamano. ''Not you too!''
The keeper shoots him a glare, muttering under his breath, ''patience, patience, patience dammit-''
Ignoring the issue of Sangoku's mental stability in favor of continuing the earlier conversation, Kurama – surprisingly – shoots Hayami a disapproving look. ''I get what you're saying, buddy, I really do, but I can't help but wonder, where did your heart go?''
''My- my heart?''
Nishiki nods gravelly. ''You see, Haya, it's not an issue here of scientific stuff, it's about- about accepting and protecting each other! We abandoned Pluto, the littlest planet, how can we ever forgive ourselves for that?''
Hayami raises his eyebrows. ''Pluto is a rock, Nishiki. What does it matter if we don't call it a planet?''
''You just don't understand it, dammit!'' Kurama slams his fist down on the bench, making the maroon-haired boy jumps. ''It's not about that!''
''Kurama is right!'' seems like Hamano is getting back into the argument now.
''…I really don't get it.''
That was the wrong thing to say, for Hamano throws himself to the ground, punching it in desperation. ''OHANA MEANS FAMILY AND FAMILY MEANS NO ONE GETS LEFT BEHIND, DAMMIT! IT'S PART OF OUR SOLAR SYSTEM SO WE SHOULD PROTECT AND NURTURE IT!''
Sangoku decides to interfere now, seeing as Hayami is too shocked to really know what to say now. ''From what? Aliens?'' asks the keeper dryly.
From the front of the room, there's suddenly a cough, sounding suspiciously like someone is trying and failing to cover up an automatic ''yes.''
Everyone looks at Tenma.
The captain merely shrugs and gestures to Tsurugi. ''What? Just ask our resident alien boyfriend.''
Tsurugi gives him a long-suffering look. ''It's been half a year, Tenma, get over it. Please.''
His only answer is a glare.
''Nevermind that!'' Hamano pulls the attention back to the topic at hand, pointing dramatically at Hayami from where he is still kneeling on the ground. ''How could you betray us like that! Saying Pluto isn't a planet is like saying Shinsuke should go back to elementary school because he's too small to be a junior high schooler!''
There are a few seconds of silence.
And then it seems to register what he said. ''Hey!'' Shinsuke shoots up angrily, and his anger only seems to grow when his friends start snickering. Seeing as they're not stopping even when he glares at them, he walks over to Hayami and sits down next to the midfielder. ''Fine then! I'll just side with people who will appreciate me!''
''Shinsuke!'' gasps Nishiki, ''how could you! You have betrayed us too!''
The small keeper glares at him. ''Well, sucks to be you then, you betrayed me first.'' And he turns to Hayami. ''Please convince me of the righteousness of Pluto losing its planetary status,'' and he bows. ''I'll be in your care.''
Over the first-year's head, Hayami shoots Hamano a triumphant smirk.
The other midfielder glowers at him.
Then he turns to the team. ''Okay! So, who is agreeing with me about the absolute awesomeness that is Pluto and that what happened to it is horrible? And who is agreeing with them,'' he waves vaguely in Hayami and Shinsuke's direction, ''even though it's obviously wrong and they're just a bunch of sad losers? No neutral sides!''
In one move, Tsurugi stands up, grabs his bag and walks to the exit. ''Fuck this, I'm out.''
''Tenma! Hey!''
Taiyou jumps on the brunet with a hug, which causes said brunet to lose his balance. ''Woa- Taiyou, be careful!''
The other captain pulls away with a sheepish laugh. ''Sorry, sorry, it's just, I haven't seen you in weeks!'' then his smile turns into a look of confusion as he stares at Tenma, and the other Raimon players there. ''Um… not that I mind, but what are you guys doing here? If you wanted to hang out, you just could've said so.''
The rest of his team seems to agree.
The Raimon players just kind of fidget, looking very out-of-place at Arakumo Academy.
''About that…'' Tenma hesitates, chuckling awkwardly. ''Refuge? Please?''
Understanding dawns on Taiyou. ''Oh. What happened this time?'' he asks, already gesturing for Tenma, Ichino and Aoi to follow him, along with the rest of the Arakumo team.
The blond-haired midfielder merely sighs. ''One word. Pluto.''
''Ah.''
''Captain, there are some people here to see you.''
Mahoro, captain of the prestigious Genei Academy soccer team, glances up at the doorway. His attention is immediately pulled towards the figures dressed in bright yellow and blue. ''Amagi? What are you doing here?''
''Amagi-kun!'' Yukie, who decided to join the soccer team as manager after her two childhood friends restarted their friendship, smiles cheerfully at the sight of the purple-haired defender. ''It's so nice to see you again!''
''Hey Mahoro, Yukie-chan,'' greets the third-year, grinning brightly.
Mahoro returns his smile and gives his companions – Hikaru and Akane – a nod. ''So, why the surprise visit?''
''We need your help!'' Akane says cheerfully, earning a bunch of raised eyebrows.
Genei's captain glances at Amagi, looking for answers. The defender grins sheepishly. ''Say, Mahoro, what are your thoughts on Pluto?''
His friend blinks.
''Wait, what?''
''MINAMISAWA GET OVER HERE!''
Those are Kurama's exact words when he interrupts Gassan Kunimitsu's training.
The former Raimon striker takes one look at his yellow-clad friends and then moves towards them, quickly followed by the entire Gassan team – if there's one thing they've learned, it's best to either stay out of the current champion's schemes if they want to stay sane, or know as much as possible and pick a side if they want to have some fun.
Training wasn't interesting anyway.
''Alright, what happened this time?'' asks Minamisawa without even bothering to greet his two former teammates.
''Hamano and Hayami started it,'' mutters Kurumada.
The Gassan striker crosses his arms and raises an eyebrow.
Kurama returns the taller boy's stare head-on. ''Pluto.''
Minamisawa needs a second to process that and then sighs.
''Of course, why the hell not.''
''Shindou, no.''
Raimon's former captain looks slightly insulted. ''I haven't even said anything yet,'' he reasons.
Captain Kishibe of Kidokawa Seishuu doesn't look impressed. ''I have known you for two years, Shindou, and ever since you won the Holy Road, your team has only caused chaos. I'm actually happy with my mental state right now.''
Shindou narrows his eyes.
Kishibe doesn't seem to care.
''We just wanted to know what your thoughts are on Pluto's loss of its planetary status,'' mutters Aoyama from where he's standing quietly next to Shindou.
Kidokawa's captain stares at both of them for a long while, and then-
''You're kidding.''
''Hello Kaiou Jr. High-!''
''Get out.''
Kaiou's captain slams the door in Kariya's face.
''Rude.''
''Coach Kidou, could I ask you for your opinion about Pluto and whether or not it should be a planet?''
Teikoku stares, uncomprehending, at the Raimon manager – the redhead, Mido-something – talking to their commander.
They're not sure if it's because the redhead looks like she won't take 'no' for an answer, or because Kidou is actually amused, but he doesn't sent her away.
Or maybe he didn't recover from the Raimon craziness after all.
That's possible too.
''Hello, Kurosaki-san and the rest of Seidouzan,'' greets Kirino politely, nodding at the orange-clad figures and giving their coach a smile. ''Gouenji-san, good afternoon.''
''Hey there!'' grins Nishiki next to him, holding up a hand in greeting.
Gouenji stares at the two Raimon players for a second. ''Does Endou know?''
The two yellow-clad teens share a look and then simultaneously shrug.
Seidouzan's coach narrows his eyes, glances at his team, at the Raimon players, and then back again. Then he seems to come to a decision. ''Kurosaki, everyone, have fun. I'm going to see if Endou has popcorn.''
''Coach, wha-?!''
Fubuki stares at Sangoku and Shinsuke for a long while, contemplating the current situation.
His team watches nervously.
Being so far away from everyone else, usually they don't get caught up in all the drama, but they've certainly heard the rumors. Now that they're in Tokyo for a match, however, things have change.
''Alright, what is it this time?'' asks their coach slowly. ''Annual chocolate festival? Baseball camp? Legendary Raimon-trio war?''
The two Raimon keepers share a look, and Sangoku sighs. ''Pluto.''
Fubuki blinks. ''Huh, we've never done that one. Sounds interesting!''
Hakuren is starting to fear for their lives and, more importantly, their sanity.
In the end, there are two sides.
The Planet Family, consisting of Genei Academy, Gassan Kunimistu and Seidouzan.
Their mortal enemies, the Dwarf Planet Plutoids, Kidokawa Seishuu, Teikoku and Hakuren.
The final battle, held at Raimon Jr. High, is just about to start. Both sides are armed to the fullest, nerf guns, paint balls, soccer balls and even a few plastic forks.
Endou has invited most of his friends over to watch the chaos unfold, much to their amusement. The coach is like a little kid in a candy shop, with how cheerful and expectant he seems – not that they can blame him. Their team had been unruly and had only gotten worse the older they got, but certainly not to this extent.
Both sides are watching each other warily, waiting for someone to make the first move. ''Hayami!''
The leader of the Dwarf Planet Plutoids, Hayami, steps forward bravely. ''Hamano,'' he responds evenly, watching his best friends coolly. ''I would tell you to stop this madness, but I know you.'' He glances at his own Raimon allies. Sangoku and Shinsuke, obviously, and Kariya comes as no surprise – he takes any chance to annoy Kirino and cause trouble.
Aoyama is a little more of a shock, but that's mostly because he didn't choose the same side as Ichino. Not that that says much, considering Ichino fled to safety, but still. Midori isn't very shocking either, she just didn't want to be on the same side as Nishiki, but Shindou is a small surprise.
Hamano glowers at Hayami. ''You can still give in, and no one will have to come to any harm,'' he offers. ''You must realize this is wrong, Haya! What happened to turn you this- this cruel?''
Hayami merely glares at the other midfielder. ''Never. Logic will rule the world.''
''So be it.'' Hamano glances at his own allies, offering them a small smile. ''Seems like we've got no choice, we need to-''
''What you need to do is stop acting like a bunch of children.''
Everyone looks at the new arrivals in surprise. Arakumo seems mostly amused, while Aoi and Ichino both look slightly exasperated. Tenma, however, looks pissed.
''You can't stop this, Tenma,'' says Hamano. ''It's too late now.''
Hayami nods in agreement.
Raimon's captain narrows his eyes and glances at Endou and his friends. Seeing as his coach seems to be too entertained by the drama to put a stop to it, the only who can apparently stop this is Tenma himself.
Unfortunately, even now, he's still not completely sure how to handle his team when they get like… this.
And then it's like a switch is flipped, realization lighting up his grey gaze.
Unknowingly to everyone present, this is the moment Tenma's most successful threat is created.
A grin pulls the brunet's lip upwards. ''Very well then,'' he says, surprising everyone. ''Go right ahead.''
Hamano and Hayami share a look and then glance at their friend. ''Uh… you sure?''
Tenma nods. ''Sure. Be my guest. Start this war.'' His grin grows and his eyes flash blue. ''However, I just want to make something clear. Practice will be finished in,'' he takes his phone out of his bag and checks it, ''forty minutes. As captain, I expect everyone to be there.''
There's a tension to the air as everyone waits for the brunet to finish his little monologue.
Tenma smirks.
''Anyone who isn't there will have their training menu tripled for the next two weeks.''
Someone chokes.
Raimon pales drastically.
''You- you can't do that!'' protests Hamano weakly.
The brunet raises an amused eyebrow. ''Oh, can't I?'' he asks slowly and then taps on the red band around his arm. ''Then tell me, what's this? Hm?''
Hamano and Hayami seem both speechless, while the other teams are mostly just amused at this point. The other Raimon members seem to hesitate – the war is fun, definitely, but their current training menu is hard, and to have it tripled…
''I'm sorry, Hamano-senpai, but I choose life,'' says Hikaru, breaking the silence, and jogs over to Tenma.
That seems to convince everyone else too.
''Alright, fine!'' Hamano sighs once all of his Raimon allies have abandoned him. He glances at Hayami, who seems to be in the same situation. ''Truce?''
The maroon-haired midfielder nods. ''Truce.''
And that is the, quite anticlimactic, end of the Great Pluto War.
What's more, it's the birth of the Tenma's new super weapon – doubling or tripling his team's training menu.
(Tsurugi returns, half an hour later, and he's only slightly surprised to find all the teams gathered at the Raimon field.
When asked where he was, he just looks at everyone blankly.
''Visiting Nii-san. Why?''
(After the whole story is repeated, he looks at Tenma.
''You wouldn't actually have tripled their training menu, right?''
The brunet glanced at him in confusion. ''Of course I would've.''
Tsurugi stares at him for a long while. ''That would've killed them.''
(That's the day he learns to fear his best friend, and whenever someone asks him why he never pisses off his captain, the brunet's words still echo in his ears.
''I know. That's what I was counting on.'')))
I'm going to work on all of your requests, I promise! I'll try to write them in the order they're requested in, too, but it all depends on my inspiration XD
Anyway, until next time!
- Yara Meijer