Nico and Jason were standing in two separate doorways in the Jackson's basement, pressing their arms against the doorframe as hard as they could. Leo was timing them while Hazel and Frank watched from the couch. Will was reading a science textbook on top of the dryer.
"Push! You gotta push or it won't work!" Leo was saying.
Jason asked, "How much longer?"
"Ten seconds," Leo answered cheerfully.
"This is so stupid," Nico griped even as he continued to do as Leo asked.
Leo waved him off. "It's not stupid, you're gonna love it. Okay, it's time. Step away from the door."
Nico and Jason stepped out of their respective doorways and their arms lifted up into the air. Their eyes widened in amazement.
"Ooooh," they said in unison.
Leo shrugged as his smile spread into a shit-eating grin. "Yeah, well, it's magic."
As the three of them went to sit back down, Percy came bounding downstairs with a dark, tanned girl following close behind.
Jason turned to ask Percy for something but when he saw the newcomer, his jaw dropped. He let out an intelligent mumbling of random syllables that sounded like another language entirely. The girl giggled at him which only caused him to smile like a giant dork.
"Hey, guys," Percy greeted as he tossed everyone a diet cream soda can. "This is my cousin Piper McLean, she just moved in down the road."
He proceeded to introduce the gang to her when Will let out a squeal that made everyone jump. "Oh my god! You're Tristan McLean's daughter! Is it true he's retiring?"
"He's not retiring, just taking a break," Piper said too quickly for it to be true.
Leo tossed his soda from hand to hand. "You know, Jackson, I've noticed the pop-selection has really gone downhill since your mom got laid off."
Percy bristled. "She's just part-time. Shut up!"
Sally came bouncing down the stairs as if summoned by the mentioning of her name. "Kids, kids, kids, kids, kids," she chanted giddily. "The president is coming!"
Jason sank down in his seat as Percy patted his shoulder reassuringly. Jason's father was the mayor of Point Place and was probably dragging his son to every boring meeting and get-together involved with the president's arrival.
"The President of these United States: Gerald R. Ford. The 35th… 9th… 40th… Oh, I don't know, he's the president!" Sally giggled.
Hazel played with a golden curl of hair. "Why in the world would President Ford come to Point Place?"
Will shifted awkwardly on the dryer as he answered, "We're a whistle stop along his New York-campaign trail. My dad's a 'famous' celebrity who's endorsing him."
"Mine, too," Piper gasped excitedly. "So, Apollo Solace is really your dad? That's amazing! You know, in the You-Understand-My-Suffering kind of way."
Jason groaned as he all but melted into the couch. "Can we stop talking about this? Being the son of the mayor was bad enough before the president came to town."
Piper winced. "Oh, you poor thing. I am so sorry."
"Look, you three. The next time you know a president is coming to town, please give me a little more notice," Sally complained as she was marching back upstairs. "I need to vacuum. Percy, you tidy up this basement. Oh, a pie! Gotta bake a pie!"
Even as she closed the basement door, the group could hear Sally Jackson talking to herself.
"The president, huh?" Percy said after a moment.
Leo leaned over the couch with a sly grin. "You know what we should do?" He asked conspiratorially. As everyone leaned in, he shouted, "That door thing again!"
Frank and Jason leaped up eagerly, ready to try the cool "magic" trick again.
(***)
Paul, Sally, and Percy were sitting at the dinner table as Reyna perched on the kitchen counter reading a Cosmopolitan magazine. Despite Sally's constant offerings, Reyna refused to eat with them (something about staying in shape for lacrosse). She was only staying so she could hide from her annoying little brother Octavian who was always killing stuffed animals. If Percy didn't know any better, he'd have sworn Octavian was going to grow up to be a serial killer.
"So, how's the car?" Paul asked.
Percy shrugged. "It's great."
Paul raised an eyebrow at his son. "By 'great', I hope you mean you've rotated those tires like I asked you to?"
"Dad, don't they rotate every time I drive?" Percy deadpanned.
Paul rolled his eyes as Reyna snorted.
"Tuna casserole? Again?" Paul asked, changing the topic.
Sally sat up straight and smiled sweetly. "Well, how about we don't pay the car insurance and we'll all have steak." When her husband dug into his tuna casserole with renewed gusto, she relaxed again. "Just imagine, President Ford coming here. Ah, Paul, we need to get rid of the oil stains in the driveway!"
"Sally, it's not like he's coming to our house. And I wouldn't want him to anyways," Paul grumbled.
"Oh, hush!" Sally gasped. "How can you say that? You voted for Gerald Ford."
Reyna quietly flipped a page of her magazine. "No one voted for Ford."
Paul waved his fork excitedly in Reyna's direction, happy to have someone agreeing with him.
"He's still our president," Sally argued.
"Percy," Paul said, effectively shoving Percy unwillingly into the middle of a political debate between his parents, "say that your job was sent to a plant in Guatela-something-or-other. Now, are you going to vote for the man that let that happen?"
Percy stared wide-eyed at a spot between his parents, hoping he would miraculously turn invisible.
Sally rolled her eyes. "President Ford isn't taking my job, he took Nixon's."
"Percy," Paul insisted much to Percy's dismay.
"I think that, uh," Percy said hesitantly, "that everyone's political opinion is valid and worth hearing."
Reyna clapped slowly and dramatically. "That's great, Perce. Use that line when you run for Miss America."
Percy almost flipped her off. Almost. Before he remembered that he was in the presence of his politically differing parents and that he would be grounded for a month.
(***)
The gang stood against the back wall of the auditorium as the principal spoke at the podium about the presidential visit. None of them looked too impressed about the whole ordeal.
"Settle down," the principal shouted. "Now, concerning the can goods drive: Motor oil is not a food." There were several boos from the gathered students. "It's not and all your booing is not going to make it one. As you all know, President Ford will be visiting our fair city and I know that some of you -" he paused to stare meaningfully at Percy and his group, "out there might be planning some sort of 'social statement' type protest."
Nico snorted. "Who cares if Ford is coming?"
Several of their group nodded in agreement.
"Hey, it's better than when the Oscar Mayer Wienermobile drove through," Percy admitted.
Annabeth rolled her eyes. "They didn't even stop. They just threw out a bunch of hot dog whistles at us."
Leo snickered perversely. "Two girls in a phallic RV, driving around handing out things you blow. iMaravilloso!"
"And let me tell you, Mr. or Mrs. Punk," the principal was saying as they tuned back in, "protesting accomplishes nothing." A light went off in Jason's head. "Sure, you might see a chance to prove your manhood or show that you're 'cool'." A light turned on in Percy's head. "But this is our president, darn it! No shenanigans, you understand?" Another light went on in Leo's mind. "If that's your kind of attitude, you might as well go home right now."
The exit sign over Frank turned on as he turned to leave with a smile before Hazel stopped him.
(***)
Apollo Solace, Tristan McLean, and Fred Chase were standing around the Solace's living room sipping on scotch as they conducted a meeting. Mr. Chase was in charge of the presidential rally and had been invited over to discuss the president's arrival.
"President Ford will be arriving at noon," Tristan McLean said casually.
Apollo opened his mouth to reply when Will and Leo walked into the living room. Leo immediately grabbed a hold of a deviled egg from a tray near the door.
"Hey, dad," Will greeted awkwardly.
His father waved him off. "Not now, Sunny. We're discussing adult stuff here. Why don't you and your friend head up to your room?"
The two teenagers glanced at each other in surprise before racing for Will's bedroom upstairs.
"The most important part of our presidential rally is the townspeople's Q and A section," Apollo continued nonchalantly.
Fred Chase sat forward. "We need to find the right person. A working-class guy, just your average Joe. Someone, someone…"
The lamp over Apollo's head lit up.
"That Ramirez-Arellano's girl! What's her name? The tough one? Rena? Raya? Reyna? Yes! Reyna!" Apollo shouted in excitement. "That's genius, Fred!"
Fred glanced around in confusion. "That's not what I was…"
"No, she's perfect!" Apollo insisted. "Her mother's worked for the Department of Defense for years, so she'll know what she's talking about! She's opinionated but she's pretty so she'll get away with it! Genius!"
(***)
The cool, unfazed black eyes stared into Fred Chase's soul as he attempted to explain his - or Apollo's - reasoning behind their - Apollo's - decision. "We, of course, thought of you. We'd like for you to ask President Ford a question. So what do you say?"
"I say no thanks. Now get off my porch," she replied without blinking.
From behind her came a young man's voice, "I'll do it."
"Shove it, Octavian," Reyna shouted in annoyance.
Fred gulped as he realized the only thing scarier than a bored Reyna was an annoyed Reyna. "You keep working on those fortunes, Octavian. Just imagine, Reyna: you, the common civilian, get to have your opinions heard by the most powerful man in America. Take advantage of this opportunity."
The porch light over Reyna's head turned on.
"Turn that light off," she shouted at Octavian who squeaked in fear before quickly turning off the offending light.
(***)
The guys stood around in the Jackson's basement discussing the president's visit. Jason paced behind the couch as Leo, Percy, and Frank watched him quietly.
"Look, you guys, we have to do something memorable," Jason finally said.
From an old supply room, Nico emerged with a beer in hand. "Yeah, you need to do something that says we will not pay homage to a corrupt political system. Something that would make our founding fathers proud, man."
Leo clapped his hands together. "Let's streak!"
"Bingo!" Jason pointed to Leo as he went to sit in the lawn chair.
"Awesome!" Leo exclaimed. "I've always wanted to do that. Just run buck naked through a sea of people. Be free and shake it around. Who's in?"
Percy's hand shot up without a second thought. "My parent's are going to kill me but it's totally worth it, man."
"Will people be chasing us with torches and pitchforks?" Frank asked warily.
Jason glanced around awkwardly. "Uh, no?"
"Then I am in," Frank said with a smile.
Nico snorted. "Count me in. Might as well add public nudity to my list of misdemeanors."
(***)
Reyna was eating lunch in the school's cafeteria with Piper and Jason when Percy and Annabeth joined them. Jason was staring at Piper with a look of complete adoration as she blushed. Reyna was trying not to throw up from the two pining teenagers.
"I don't see how they expect us to eat this crap," Percy complained as Nico and Leo made their way over. "Hey, guys, the rally is tonight."
Nico smiled knowingly as Leo laughed maniacally.
Reyna narrowed her eyes at the guys as Piper and Annabeth each raised an eyebrow. The boys responded with matching secretive grins, except Jason who hid his growing blush from Piper.
"What are you dumbasses planning?" Reyna asked suspiciously.
"Are you going to look like a bunch of idiots?" Annabeth asked before they could answer.
Leo chuckled darkly. "A bunch of naked idiots."
Annabeth groaned as Reyna busted out laughing. Piper's blush darkened as she realized what Leo was insinuating.
"Dear god, you guys are going to look like complete idiots," Reyna said through the laughter. "I can't wait to see that! Who's the genius that came up with this idea? Leo?"
Leo's face showed how proud of himself he was for his idea.
(***)
"Make way for my presidential pies," Sally chirped as she carried a tray of pies to the table where Reyna sat writing in the Jackson's kitchen. "We've got cherry, apple, and blueberry. See? It's red, white, and blue! Isn't that cute?"
Reyna nodded hesitantly.
Piper entered with a piece of paper that she nervously placed in front of Reyna. "Um, my dad told me to give this to you. Please, please, don't kill the messenger."
"What is it?" Reyna asked suspiciously.
The tanned girl took a small step away from the vicious looking girl in front of her. "It's, uh, your question for President Ford?"
"But I'm working on my question for President Ford," Reyna said quietly.
Piper stood her ground even though she was terrified that the girl was going to stab her at any moment with the pen in her hand. "Well," she swallowed, "this is the one my dad's committee made you?"
She grimaced as she realized how all her statements were coming out sounding like questions.
Reyna read the question aloud, "'What has been you favorite parade?' Oh god, the hell is wrong with that damn committee? I can ask President Ford whatever damn thing I want. It's my right and I am not going to be a puppet for your dad's asinine committee. If they wanted an idiot they should have asked for Leo or Percy."
As if summoned by his name, Percy walked through the kitchen door and almost walked back out when he sensed the tension building. His mother grabbed his arm before he could make his escape. Before he could argue, she was handing him trays of pies to be placed on the dining room table right in the middle of No Man's Land. Percy gave his mom a pleading look but she was already retreating to the main dining room, pretending to be busy.
"Look, I didn't write the question,' Piper explained desperately. "If you're going to get mad, get mad at Mr. Chase or my dad. Even Mr. Solace wanted you to ask whatever you wanted."
"Tell your father he can get bent," Reyna spat before turning back to her question.
Paul strolled in through the sliding door with a gentle smile. When he caught sight of Percy's terrified face as he inched his way toward Reyna with a tray, though, his smile vanished. When Reyna got into one of these moods it was always best to give her space. The door made an audible click in the tense quiet as Paul closed it and Piper jumped in surprise.
Her face said it all. Paul sighed before opening the door for his niece who proceeded to scurry out.
Percy hesitantly placed the tray on the table, careful to avoid eye contact before he shot back to the living room door.
'Hey, dad," he said from the far side of the room, "can I borrow your trench coat?"
Paul nodded his assent and Percy bolted from the room.
"Sorry, Mr. Jackson," Reyna muttered as Paul went to grab a beer from the refrigerator.
(***)
Annabeth had to remind herself what it was she saw in Percy when she stepped on to the Jackson's driveway to find five guys in nothing but trench coats.
Jason and Percy wore matching shit-eating grins as they each held a Snoopy and Nixon mask, respectively. Leo was bouncing excitedly in place as Frank looked around in embarrassment.
Nico held up his Oscar Mayer whistle. "Alright, here's the plan. We all put on our Snoopy masks, Percy you put your Nixon mask on, and then I'll blow my whistle. That means we go."
"You sure you want to add this to your list of criminal offenses? I mean what if you go to jail?" Jason asked.
The Italian shrugged nonchalantly. "Hey, man, remember, it's not a matter of if I go to jail. It's a matter of when. I figure if it's inevitable then I may as well make the most of it. Go big or go home, right?"
"Can you not go big and go home? Home is not so bad, yeah?" Frank spoke up only to be relatively ignored.
Annabeth laughed as Leo shifted from foot to foot in anticipation.
"Can we go already?" he said. "I'm itching to let loose the hound here."
Sally came out to see them off. "Well, look at you boys. What is with you young people and Columbo?"
She threw her hands up as she shook her head. The guys said a quick goodbye before jumping into the Vista Cruiser. Annabeth waved them off with a small sigh.
(***)
Outside the rally, the guys were waiting around when Leo spotted Will sitting a few rows down talking to some random guy. Despite Nico's protests, Leo took off down the aisle.
He heard a snippet of conversation that sounded suspiciously like flirting before he could interrupt them.
"Hey, are you hitting on my boyfriend?" Leo shoved the guy away despite the fact that the guy was practically twice his size.
Will groaned. "No, Leo, he's not."
"You wanna go, ese?" Leo shoved the guy roughly. Leo started to take off his coat to fight before remembering that he was stark naked underneath. He angrily tied his trench coat tighter. "You're so lucky that I'm naked, pal!"
The guy scoffed as he moved on. Will rolled his eyes at his boyfriend's stupidity.
Frank gasped. "Whoa, there's a lot of other guys in trench coats. Are they streaking, too?"
"Uh, no," Jason chuckled. "They're with secret service, man."
Looking at all the intimidating presidential security, the guys started to squirm uncomfortably. The reality of what they were about to do finally sunk in.
"Maybe we should sit down?" Percy suggested.
Everyone agreed quickly.
"You know, maybe I should stay back and hold onto your trench coats? I mean, you guys can't exactly come back for them. And it is my fault, so I'll take the bullet and hang back," Jason hedged.
Nico rolled his eyes.
Piper sat next to Jason and leaned into whisper in his ear. "Kill me now so I don't have to deal with the fallout, alright? Reyna's going to ask her own question against my dad's wishes."
Jason's eyes widened in amazement. "You let Reyna ask the question? Your dad thought he could control Reyna? I tell you what, if this goes exactly how I know it's going to go, then we can sneak out that side door and wait this out in the basement."
She mouthed the words, 'Thank you'.
Apollo Solace entered from a side entrance and made his way up to the stage. Once he stood behind the podium the audience quieted down.
"Ladies and gentlemen, the President of the United States of America: Gerald R. Ford," he introduced in his deep voice.
The audience clapped politely as the president approached the podium.
As the president began his speech, Percy caught sight of Annabeth standing beside her parents who were both in bright American flag jumpsuits for some reason. Annabeth sidled up next to him at one point with a tired sigh.
"You gonna streak?" Annabeth asked casually.
Percy smiled his trademark lopsided grin. "You want us to distract the crowd from your parents fashion failure, right?"
"Shut up," she grumbled before adding slyly, "I just thought its been awhile since I've seen you naked."
"You've never seen me naked," Percy said with certainty.
Annabeth laughed. "Like a zillion times. When we were kids you were always running around the neighborhood naked and screaming 'wee-wee, pee-pee!'"
Percy hung his head in embarrassment as Mr. Solace stepped back up to the podium. "It is now time for the Q and A portion of our program. First up, I'd like to introduce Miss Reyna Ramirez-Arellano. Miss Reyna is the daughter of the infamous Bellona Ramirez-Arellano who, as we all know, worked for the Department of Defense. She is a remarkable student in high school and a loving sister to her two siblings. And despite the fact that her mother was laid off, she has managed to make the best of this terrible situation. I give you, Reyna Ramirez-Arellano!"
Will sunk lower in his seat. He knew that look and was shocked that his dad would be so reckless with the President of the United States.
"Mr. President," Reyna announced.
Sally and Paul stared at Reyna nervously while Apollo smiled giddily from where he was seated. Leo smirked in amusement as he waited for Reyna to speak. But before Reyna could continue, Percy slapped on his Nixon mask and threw his coat off onto Annabeth's face. He ran into the center aisle with his fist raised high.
"Wee-wee! Pee-pee! Wee-wee! Pee-pee!" Percy shouted dramatically. He raced out the door, followed closely by the secret service agents as his friends looked on in disbelief.
With a smirk, Reyna shook her head. "Hey, Gerry, here's my question: How the hell could you pardon Nixon?"
The audience cheered and Mr. Solace barked out a laugh while Mr. McLean shook his head in disgust.
(***)
Hours later, Paul sat in his favorite recliner while Reyna lounged on the couch.
"You did good today, Reyna," Paul said after a moment.
She gave him a small smile but refused to look at him. She had never done well with genuine compliments from adults.
Percy came through the front door with his lopsided grin in place.
"Hey, son," Paul said with a knowing raise of his eyebrow.
Reyna snorted as she sat up to look at him over the back of the couch. "Hey, Nudist."
Percy chuckled nervously as he headed for the basement. "All right, well, I'm going downstairs."
"Next time," Reyna said before Percy was out of earshot, "don't wear black socks. You looked like an ass."
Percy chuckled good-naturedly as he made his way to the stair landing. He was greeted with the sight of his best friend and his cousin making out on the couch. "WHAT?"
Jason and Piper shot away from each other with looks of guilt and shock clear on their faces.
"Hey, man, good to know you didn't get arrested," Jason tried with a nervous chuckle. "That was really funny stuff!"
Percy flailed his arms out in front of him in baffled anger. "My cousin? My cousin, man? And, Pipes, my best friend? Really?" Percy looked around in frustration. "What is this world coming to? First Will and Leo of all freaking people; Hazel's practically dating the dorky foreign kid; and now this? And I'm still not with Annabeth? What the hell?"
He stormed back up the stairs as Jason started laughing at him. Piper looked offended at first but the more Jason laughed the harder it was for her to stifle her giggles.
(***)
Percy and Annabeth sat on the hood of the Vista Cruiser in the Jackson's driveway. Annabeth bumped her shoulder against his.
"How could they not catch you?" Annabeth asked with a laugh.
"Nobody wants to tackle a naked guy," Percy answered.
Annabeth nodded in agreement.
"Did you," Percy started to ask. "Um, did you see anything?"
"Well… Maybe just a bit. But, you know, not the bit," she answered.
The two sit in silence for a moment before her words sink in. "Wait, what do you mean bit?"