Chapter 4
I own nothing of the Twilight franchise.
BPOV
The next morning I found myself easing my way down the staircase, as I was way ahead of schedule. I hadn't seen Edward up until now, sprawled out across the couch, one arm and one leg dangling off of the side. I admired the way his natural highlights were shown in the way the sunlight was beginning to filter through the window. I ran my eyes along his body, down his legs, and back up to his face. I nearly jumped when I saw his green eyes on mine.
Despite my musings, my voice was ice cold. "You slept down here all night?" His words from the night before had cut me deeper than I'd like to admit. I knew he was never comfortable with my friendship with Jasper, and regardless of how it made me feel, I respected his wishes and kept my distance.
He scrubbed the heels of his palms over his eyes as he spoke, "I was afraid if I stayed upstairs, I wouldn't have been able to accommodate your desire for solitude."
I hummed at him as I strode past the couch and into the kitchen to brew my morning pick me up, which also had the benefit of putting some space between the two of us.
I glanced into the sink as I passed it, eyeing the bottle and glass. The sight took me right back to the previous night. I huffed a sigh and as I filled the machine with coffee grounds, he spoke, "Bella." His voice was far closer to me than I expected. I turned around to find him sitting in one of the stools at the island. He cleared his throat and shifted his gaze so that he wasn't quite looking at me. He seemed to be debating whether he should let his next words escape or not.
He had shadows underneath each eye that only seemed to be darkening by the day and his beard showed signs of neglect, like he hadn't groomed it the entire weekend.
His voice interrupted my thoughts, "Did you sleep alright?"
I had a feeling that wasn't what he originally intended to say, but I didn't feel compelled to voice my opinion. Instead, I shrugged my shoulders briefly and lied, "I slept fine."
His eyes fell on mine, then danced across my face, taking swift inventory of my features, "I heard you tossing and turning all night."
I slinked around the island and he turned in his seat to meet me halfway. He opened his legs, silently inviting me to stand between them, but I remained in my place just out of his reach. No matter how much I craved the comfort of his touch, I couldn't bring myself to move any closer. His words last night left a void in me that his touch could not even begin to fill. "Then why bother ask?"
I watched as he squeezed his eyes shut and pinched the bridge of his nose, releasing an irritated breath, "You know Bella, I'm trying."
I cocked my head at him, a dozen responses racing through my mind at once, none of them kind. Maybe if I had slept a bit more, I would have been successful in biting my tongue. The words flew out of my mouth before I could consider stopping them, "This is your idea of trying?" I folded my arms across my chest, and shifted my body further from his, "You think coming up with some meaningless small talk the morning after accusing me of sleeping with Jasper, of all people, is trying?"
Suddenly not wanting to look at him any longer, I shook my head and walked past him. As I jogged up the staircase, I heard the scrape of the stool on the tile as Edward proceeded to follow me. His voice boomed behind me, "No running today, Bella. You have to face this."
His words stopped my dead in my tracks. I had just reached the stop of the staircase when I heard it. His footsteps ceased as well.
My breathing had become deep and erratic, and it took nearly all of my energy to keep myself halfway calm. I turned slowly, my eyes falling on his. He was stood at the foot of the steps, bracing each hand on the banister.
I spoke sharply, "I don't have to do anything! I've done everything! I respected your feelings, I pushed Jasper away for you. I did everything in my power to show you what I wanted," I began pacing a few steps and tugged my fingers through my hair, "You became everything to me, Edward." I trailed off as a dull ache radiated through my chest. Taking a deep breath, I stopped my pacing and stood at the top of the staircase, peering down at him. My eyes were weary as I watched him, searching for any type of reaction. His face was a mask of coolness as if I hadn't spoken a word, but the look in his eyes said otherwise.
He scratched the scruff along his jaw as he studied me, "What you wanted..."he walked up a few of the stairs, as his eyes bore into mine, "Do you no longer want me?"
I spoke in nearly a whisper, resisting the urge to roll my eyes at the way he picked my words apart, "All I know is I want this to stop."
Slowly he moved up the remainder of the staircase, and I felt the surge of electricity between his body and mine, though it was only for a moment, so fleeting I wasn't even sure I felt it. I kept my eyes trained on the beige carpet as he closed the distance between us.
His tone was flat and his voice was quiet, "And you think I don't? Do you think this is how I envisioned our lives together?"
Shaking my head ever so slightly, I began to shut down.
Sensing the shift in energy, he spoke softly to me, "I know I took things too far last night. It's just, every time I saw you two alone it-it drove me crazy. He's my brother, I know him. I know how he feels about you."
I furrowed my brow at his words, "And what is it that you think you know?"
"I know he's wanted you since the moment he met you," his voice became even softer as he continued, "I know he doesn't think I deserve you," his Adam's apple bobbed as he swallowed, "and maybe he's right, maybe I don't deserve you. Maybe I never have."
My mind was spinning at his words. I always knew deep down how Edward felt about this but it was still hurtful to hear him say it.
He began to approach me, forcing me to take a step back. "I'm not ready to let you go," the layers of meaning behind his words sent another familiar ache blooming across my chest, "i know you have to leave soon and I'm not going to hold you up. But I'll be home early tonight. We need to talk about this."
Incapable of uttering another word, I gave him a hazy nod and turned away from him, a futile attempt to hide my tears.
I had just gotten through my fourth client meeting with Rosalie before she addressed the elephant in the room. I was collecting my laptop and notebook when she spoke, "Wait a minute, Bella."
Stopping my movements, I glanced up watching her across the desk, "Hmm?"
She flipped her platinum blonde hair over her shoulder as she eyed me, "I've noticed a change in you, which is certainly more complicated than a couple of rough mornings," she sighed, seemingly choosing her next words carefully, "We've worked together for a long time and I consider you a friend, of sorts."
I nodded my head in the affirmative, slightly flattered at her words, "I do too."
Her nod was brief, "Which is why I feel compelled to tell you that, if there's something going on," she shot me a pointed expression, "you can talk to me about it."
I shook my head, more at myself than at her, and resumed gathering my belongings, "I'll keep that in mind, thank you."
Though her offer seemed genuine, at this point all I wanted to do was be alone. As if she could read my mind, Rosalie stood and stalked her way to the office door, shutting it with a thud. She returned to her desk and raised an eyebrow, as if daring me to try to leave.
Defeated, I leaned back in my seat and crossed my legs. "I'm really not in the right head space to talk about it but, Edward and I have been having some trouble. For a-a uh couple of months now, I'd say."
Rose hummed at me and her eyes softened, but only marginally, "Trouble?"
I combed my fingers through my hair and cast a glance around her office, as if my next words were written across the bookshelves. My response was distant, even to my ears, "We've just been fighting," I hesitated before continuing, "a lot," I finished lamely.
She leaned forward, lowering her voice "At least you do that."
I tilted my head at her, not entirely sure of what she was implying. Mercifully, she didn't leave me hanging, "Means you care enough to."
I shrugged, considering that she may have a point, "I suppose so, but we can't go on like this Rose. I'm exhausted...we're exhausted. I can see it in his eyes, every time I look at him."
The shrill ring of Rosalie's office phone tugged us both back into our surroundings. She shot me an apologetic smile, "That's my four o'clock," she reached across the wooden surface and gently placed her hand over mine, "Everything will be alright, we'll pick this up later, yeah?"
Relieved, I gave her a small smile. Though it wasn't much to write home about, and I highly doubted there would be any follow up to this conversation, it was the warmest exchange I've had with Rose. Once she retracted her hand, I silently gathered the rest of my things so as to not disrupt her conversation.
Despite her words, I left her office just as foggy as I was when I entered.
Edward had made good on his word. From the end of our street, I spotted his car in the driveway. I checked the clock to see it was only thirty minutes past six.
I pulled into the driveway and braced myself for whatever lie ahead of me. For both of our sakes, we cannot drag this out any longer. That was one thing Edward was right about. I shuffled from the car, into the house which was in complete silence. I locked the door and called out for my husband, "Edward?"
There was a beat before I got a response, his voice was thick, "Upstairs."
Resigned to the reality of the situation, I trudged up the stairs to find him sat on the bed. He was still in his suit, his tie loose around his neck. His eyes found mine immediately, and he addressed me softly, "For some reason I thought you might not come home tonight."
Folding my arms across my chest I leaned against the doorframe, deciding this was as close as I needed to get. "Why would you think that?"
He let out a humorless and brief laugh before responding, "I need to tell you something."
His words sending a chill down my spine. He seemed suddenly aware of the way his statement came across and tried to clean it up, "It's not what you think."
I bit my lip harder than I intended but I barely registered the pain, "You know, Edward if either of those statements were meant to calm me down, I want you to know you've failed miserably."
He groaned and swept his eyes over me, and he spoke almost just to himself, "I've been failing in a lot of ways, haven't I baby?" His eyes blazed a slow path down my body, his gaze lingering on my skirt clad hips. Then he ripped the bandage off, "The nights I've been coming home late, I wasn't with clients."
That was a punch straight to the gut. I stumbled backward into the hallway a bit. Sure, I had my suspicions, but there's nothing like confirmation. His face showed alarm at my reaction, but he kept talking, "I just didn't...I didn't want to be here. I would go to the bar and have a couple drinks, blow off steam, you know?" He looked at me expectantly, as if I were supposed to see the harmlessness of his actions. My expression remained as blank as I could manage, which is what I presume spurred him on. "I didn't want to deal with what we've become."
Tears welled in my eyes, as if there was a direct line from his words to my lacrimal glands. I clutched my sides, as if it would hold me, "Am I that horrible to you?"
He shot off the bed and was cradling my face in his hands in record time, "No Bella, Christ, I hate seeing you cry," he swiped his thumbs under my eyes and forced me to look at him, "I figured it would just be better without me here, I needed-"
My emotions were all over the spectrum. A streak of rage slithered its way along my spine. I slapped his hands off of my overheated cheeks, "You accuse me of running away but you, you're the coward. You worried me, you let me sit here night after night and think you were-" my chest was heaving at this point, "Why bother tell me now? Huh?" I shoved his chest causing him to take a step back, probably a result of shock rather than my strength, "Why didn't you just keep your little routine to yourself? Why?" My voice was a vile hiss at this point.
To his credit, he had the decency to look remorseful. "Babygirl-" He reached for me, which proved to be futile. I didn't allow for him to offer further explanation, my rage continued bubbling over the surface. "Don't! Don't call me that, don't come any closer." My heart rate accelerated far beyond what was healthy.
He proceeded to ignore my demands, and did the exact opposite of what I said. He rushed me, pulling my face into his chest and began rocking me slowly back and forth. I wanted to fight, I wanted to push him away, but I was out of steam. Placing his lips in my hair, he murmured, "I swear to you I wasn't giving up on us. I just-"
I stiffened in his arms at his words, as they seemed to reignite my flame. Carefully, I fidgeted out of his embrace, determined to look him in the eye when I hurled my next question.
"Are you alone?"
He furrowed his bronze eyebrows at me and allowed his gaze to fall to the floor. He began to remove the tie from around his neck, if only he could shed the weight of my question along with it. He spoke carefully, "I'm not sure I follow."
A frustrated breath escaped my lips as I looked him over, "When you go to the bar instead of coming home, are you alone?"
He swallowed hard, tossing the tie on the dresser. "Not always. Jessica goes with me, or sometimes Emmett comes along."
It took great effort for me to maintain whatever sense of calm I had leftover. "Jessica goes with you."
He nodded, "Yes, but there's nothing more than that. A couple of drinks and conversation. I swear to you Bella, I would never betray you in that way, never. And-and when Emmett goes with me it's-"
I huffed, and put my hand up, requesting him to stop talking. My voice was cold and hollow as I addressed him, "Give me a minute. Please."
To my surprise, he stopped his explanation immediately. I didn't spare him a glance as I stormed into the bathroom, barely turning the door behind me. I washed the tears from my skin and tried to cool my cheeks. I was a disaster, inside and out.
Once my eyes were clear, and I was clad in a pair of sweatpants and a T-shirt, I stepped back into the room. Edward was no where to be found. I listened for movement, and I heard the sliding door to the back patio glide along its track. Determined to finish this and with a fresh wave of melancholy, I headed down the steps and found him leaning against the patio railing, a cigarette hanging from his lips. His shoulders stiffened, signaling to me that he was aware of my presence. I stepped out in the evening air, the smell of smoke overwhelming my senses.
I addressed him softly, "I thought you quit."
He pinched the offensive white cylinder in his fingers, pulling it away from his mouth, the smoke tumbling out behind it, "I did."
I hummed, disappointed that he had resumed this habit. He knew how much I hated it. It just gave me another reason to worry about him.
His tone was clipped, though I knew it was because he was overwhelmed, "It calms me down. We can't all be marathon runners, Bella."
His comment stung. He was clearly still mad at me for being at Jasper's the other day. We hadn't cleared that hurdle.
I walked over to stand by his side. I fiddled with my wedding ring as I spoke, "Jessica, she's your boss, right?" I paused, trying to organize my next thought. Edward's green orbs were trained on me as he absently blew the smoke away from my face. He took another pull from his cigarette. Annoyed with his constant movement, I plucked the cigarette out of his mouth and stubbed it out beneath my feet. He sighed, releasing the rest of the grey substance, but didn't protest.
Edward cleared his throat before answering my inquiry, "Yes. She got promoted last year."
I nodded, remembering attending the small celebration she held. That was another tense evening for us, I relived the events in my head as I spun my wedding around my finger. Though it's beautiful, it is larger than I want, but Esme had helped him pick it out and I didn't have the heart to reject it. "How am I supposed to believe that it's nothing more than drinks and conversation?" I paused and crossed my arms across my chest. "Even if that's the case, I know what that turns into."
Edward grimaced at me, furrowing his brow even further. "Just because I'm not here with you, doesn't mean I'm out there sleeping with someone else."
Deep down I believe him, whether that's foolish or not, but the dishonesty I've been faced with these past few months has left me unsure.
I grimaced at the obvious double standard, "So it's okay for you to insinuate that I've been with Jasper but I can't question whether you're sleeping with someone else every night, instead of coming home to me?" I threw my hands up in the air in exasperation.
Edward shook his head harshly and began patting his pockets for his pack. He proceeded to light another one, shielding the flame from the wind as he contemplated his answer.
His brow was furrowed as he exhaled harshly, "It's not the same. I know he wants you. I watch him fall more in love with you every time he lays his eyes on you." He took another short pull from his cigarette, "I can't bare it. The thought of you together makes me..." he trailed off, tapping off the cigarette into the ash tray.
I raked my fingers through my hair, "I don't care what you think Jasper wants, you know me. You should know me. And-and that should be enough."
His eyes were pensive as they focused on my face, as if he were memorizing every detail. Every freckle, every line. As if I could disappear at any moment. In a flash he stubbed the cigarette out and pushed his hands in my pockets before he spoke, pulling me into him, "You're right, it should be."
He left off the final part of that statement, but I filled it in for myself. It should be, but it isn't.
I leaned away from him as best I could, scanning his expression. I swallowed hard and bit my lip. As my teeth pushed deeper into my skin, Edward slipped one hand up to my face, freeing my lip with a gentle thumb. He spoke to me softly, "As far as Jessica goes...I've said it before and I'll say it as many times as I need to, there will never be anyone else, but you."
I turned my head completely to side, nudging his thumb away from me and gazing across our yard to the neighbors. It felt as though he was completely brushing off his offense. At first he seemed remorseful, but that seemed to only be momentary. A misjudgment perhaps.
Edward sighed deeply and stepped away from me. He began pacing the patio.
I pushed my hair behind my ears and spoke the kindest words I could muster, "If that's true and-and if you care at all, about fixing us," I took a deep breath, "These late nights stop now. I will not share my husband."
This caused Edward to freeze in place. He turned his head to me, his eyes remained unreadable, but his expression showed frustration. "Is that how you feel? That you've been sharing me."
My eyes hardened, "Sharing may even be too strong of a word. It would imply that I have some part of you."
Irritation swept across this beautifully angled face, "I've only been giving you as much as you've been giving me. You set the pace here Bella."
I stepped toward him, jabbing a finger toward my chest, "I set the pace? I'm here! I'm home every night, waiting for you!"
Edward barked out a laugh which lacked any trace of actual humor. "Sure, you're here physically. But mentally, emotionally?" He ran his hand along his scruff as he spoke, "You left me a long time ago."
Those words sent a windfall of emotions within me. Did he have a point? Was I the catalyst for all of this? Was any of that an excuse for his behavior? I felt as if the wind had been knocked out of me. I stepped as far away from him as the railing would allow me. I gripped the faux wood behind me as if it could anchor me to the earth.
Edward watched the way his words were absorbed. His eyes scanned my form slowly and I half expected him to say something but those thoughts were dashed away when I watched him turn away from me. He began to walk back into the house, only hesitating for a beat or two in the doorway. Seemingly thinking better of it, he continued into the house, leaving me more alone than ever.
—
I stayed on the patio and watched the sunset until all color in the sky had disappeared. I wasn't sure what Edward was doing but I knew he was home as I hadn't heard his car leave the driveway.
A chill had begun to fill the air, that I could no longer withstand. Resigned, I pushed myself to my feet and made my way into the house. As I stepped inside I heard the soft murmur of Edward's voice upstairs. I didn't allow my mind to wander as to who may be on the other end. I simply didn't have the energy or the will.
I stopped in the kitchen for an apple and a glass of water. I hadn't eaten anything since lunch, but given tonight's events, I didn't have much of an appetite.
I took a seat at the island, mindlessly consuming my poor excuse for dinner. I watched the glowing green numbers on the stove. It was a quarter to ten and I was entirely exhausted. I finished my water, setting the glass in the dishwasher and dropping the core in the trash. I collected the garbage and carried it outside, setting it in the can.
I slipped back into the house quickly, goosebumps covering my arms. Locking the door behind me I turned to find Edward at the top of the staircase, watching me.
I let out a light gasp. These Cullen men seemed to have a knack for sneaking up on me. I huffed a sigh and started up the staircase, Edward stepped out of my way and took hold of my wrist as I began to pass him.
I kept my head forward, feeling his breath waft across my cheek. It seemed he had brushed his teeth as the foul cigarette scent had disappeared.
His voice was as gentle, as his touch, "I didn't mean to startle you. I thought you were leaving."
Though understandable, I was having trouble keeping up with his shifts in mood. I pulled my arm out of his grasp, "And where would I be going?" I knew I didn't need to say that. I should have just continued past him with nothing more than a goodnight. I was starting something I had no idea how to finish. But part of me, the very angry part, was daring him to hurl another accusation at me.
He knew it and was smart enough not to take the bait. We both knew the answer, I didn't need him to say it. He spoke quietly, "I'll take the guest room tonight. I know our bed is better for your back."
I nodded in a hollow attempt at a gratitude, "Goodnight, Edward."
—-
The week has passed with very little interaction between the two of us. Though Edward had been coming home every night on time, we weren't eating together, sleeping in the same bed, or speaking beyond what was absolutely necessary.
We had passed each other in the kitchen this morning without greeting.
The vibration of my phone across my desk pulled me out of my work, which had been my saving grace from the disaster that was my home life. I gazed at the screen, a smile crossing my face as I answered.
"Hi, dad."
Charlie's gruff voice spoke, "Hey kiddo! Got tired of only talking to you through text, figured I'd call to see how you were doing."
"I'm alright dad, just wrapping up something's at work."
He cleared this throat, "You've been working long hours."
I hummed, knowing he was aware that some was off but he wasn't going to push the matter, "I know dad, I'm just getting ahead of things for next week."
He grumbled something but as I suspected, left it alone. The rest on the conversation continued without a mention of Edward. Charlie was never a fan of my husband and therefore was never interested in the topic of my marriage, outside of how I was doing.
The conversation was wrapping up as a tap on my door drew my attention. Jasper met my eyes with a bright smile, and I beckoned him inside. He came in quietly and took a seat across from me. I bid my dad goodbye and turned my attention to my new found company.
His smile faltered a bit as he really looked at me, "You look tired."
I laughed and stood up to shut the door, muffling the noise from the hallway, "That's because I am."
He hummed and looked me over as I took my seat again, "I wanted to apologize for the other night. I should not have said anything, and I'm sorry."
"It's okay Jas, I'm not upset with you."
He combed his fingers through his blond curls, a hesitant expression crossing his face, "You should be. It's not my job to rub salt in the wound."
I shrugged lightly, offering him a warm expression, "Water under the bridge." Jasper's words the other night were truly the least of my concerns.
"So you wouldn't be opposed to grabbing lunch with me?"
I nodded, my mind immediately flashing to his potential transfer. I masked my disappointment at the thought with a bright smile, "Of course not, I was just finishing up here anyway for the morning."
—-
I was halfway through my tortellini when Jasper broke the cheerful energy we had created, with only a facial expression.
He leaned back a bit in his seat across the table. I slowed my chewing and mirrored his actions.
Jasper looked me over as he seemed to piece his thought together, "I've thought about the transfer a lot and...I think it's best if I take it."
My eyebrows raised at the thought that this wasn't even a conversation for him. His mind was already made up.
He shrugged at my expression and took a drink from his water, "My whole life is here," he swallowed and continued on, "But there's nothing really for me, here. The pay would be better and it'd be a nice change of page. Maybe that's what I need, you know? But I value your opinion Bella, you know me better than anyone."
"Nothing for you here?" I paused, crossing my legs and leaning toward him a bit, "Jasper your whole family is here, your-your friends, I'm-" I hesitated, thinking better of my next choice of words. It may not be appropriate to separate myself from friends and family, seeing as I fit into both of those categories. I shook my head clear of the thoughts and looked him over, his expression had a color of discomfort, "I just-I just want you to do what's best for you but I-I feel like I just got my best friend back. And I know that's selfish of me and it's not fair. But you asked me how I felt and-"
He cut me off with a brief laugh, "Bella, relax. That's your opinion and I don't want you to apologize for it."
I shot him a sheepish smile, "Right, I just-everyone would miss you." I took another pull from my glass of water.
Jasper nodded thoughtfully, "Not everyone."
My eyes widened slightly at his response, "That's not true, Jas. Of course he would, he's your brother."
"I don't think so, Bella. Too much tension between us these days." He checked his watch, noting the time, "We should head back, Swan. We've got about twenty minutes," he glanced out the window to his left, "and it looks like traffic picked up out there."
I nodded my head and began fishing for my wallet, when I saw Jasper getting up from the table. He raised an eyebrow at me, "I asked you to lunch, I've got it." I sighed, shaking my head at him lightly, "Thank you."
—-
I patted the tears from my eyes with Jasper's handkerchief, and spoke through my fit of giggles, "Jasper, stop! My mascara is going to be ruined by the time we get back."
My blond companion flashed me a grin as he weaved through traffic, "You know it's true! You had the coordination of a toddler."
Rolling my eyes playfully, I nudged his arm with my elbow, "And I still do, I do not need a reminder." We pulled up to a stoplight and Jasper turned to me, meeting my eyes. "Feel better, Swan?"
I neutralized my expression, "How did you know something was wrong?"
He reached across, covering the hand that was on my lap with his own, "It was written all over your face. Have you two spoken this week?"
Jasper may have been out of the loop the past few months, but he knows how Edward and I choose to handle conflict. Arguments or silence. I shook my head, "We haven't, no."
He hummed, turning his attention back to the road, and began to accelerate through the now green light. He looked pensive for another moment before he spoke, "I can talk to him. Ease his mind."
I felt my eyes bug a bit, "No, you don't need to do that. This isn't your fight."
Jasper shook his head, "I would argue that I've probably be a central part of Edward's, uh, grievances."
I cringed at the fact that Jasper didn't have the full story. I hadn't yet told him about Edward's night caps, but now did not seem like the right time, seeing as we were nearly back to our building. I didn't want to get either of the rest of our afternoons off to a poor start. I smiled at him, squeezing his hand a bit, "I appreciate that, really. It's between us though, and I will handle it."
He still didn't look convinced but relented anyway, "If you say so, Swan."
—-
10:45pm. Edward had yet to return home, all the while his phone has done nothing but go straight to voicemail. I drained my third glass of wine and wiped the tears from my cheeks with the sleeve of my robe. Edward's blatant ignorance of the one thing I asked of him the other night. The one thing.
I continued pacing the kitchen, counting the tiles in the floor. I was desperate to distract myself from the pit that had formed in my stomach.
A knock on the front door drew me out of my musings. I rolled my eyes, tightening the robe around me, storming to the front door. On top of everything, apparently he's forgotten his keys somewhere. I tore the door open, only to be shocked at my husband not being there.
"Swan?" Jasper's face showed alarm at mine, now red and tear stained. He stepped into the house, and I backed away without another thought, allowing him further inside. He shut the door behind him quietly, studying me, "Honey, what's going on? Where's Edward?" He leaned around me, peering into the kitchen, looking for any sign of company. His gaze froze for a moment, no doubt
registering my wine bottle on the counter. "Ed?", he called out.
I began walking back to the kitchen, Jasper following, "He's not here."
I observed as he set my planner on the counter, I must have left it in his car earlier. I hadn't even missed it. "He out of town?"
I barked out a laugh, making my way to the cabinet to grab him a glass. I got on my tip toes, attempting to reach the third shelf. I felt hands wrap around my sides, "Swan, hey," he eased me off of my mission and turned my around to face him. "What's going on? Is Edward okay?"
I folded my arms across my chest, the alcohol was really hitting me more Han I realized, "Not sure. Maybe I can call Jessica and find out."
He cocked his head to the side in confusion, "Bella, come on. Talk to me, I'm here."
I nodded, "You're right. You're here and he isn't." I shook my head clear of unsavory thoughts, "Edward accused me of sleeping with you," I monitored his expression. He seemed disappointed but not surprised in any way. I continued, "He doesn't come home most nights, tells me he's with clients. But the-" tears began to well in my eyes at the blatant rejection from the man who promised to love me through anything. Jasper took his thumbs, swiping them under my eyes to catch the tears before they could fall. I sniffled, "The other night he told me that that entire time, he was with Jessica. His-his boss. Apparently they head to the bar every night after work, for drinks and conversation, nothing more."
Jasper's lips hardened into a straight line, clearly trying to refrain from express his frustration or upset me any further. He leaned back against the island, his eyes falling from my face to the floor. "How long has this been going on, Bella?"
"Oh! And sometimes Emmett tags along, which of course, was a fact meant to mitigate my reaction."
His voice softened, "How long?"
My shrug was futile as I looked him over. He was dressed in basketball shorts and a sweatshirt. He must have stopped here on his way home from the gym. "Months, not sure."
I watched his honey eyebrows furrow, he mumbled to himself, "Unbelievable," he cleared this throat, "Why didn't you say something to me sooner?"
I returned to my wine bottle, deciding that more alcohol was probably not what I needed. Slowly, I dragged myself to the fridge and pushed it inside, turning back to face him. "We weren't really talking, which was my fault entirely. And I never wanted to bother you. Not with that."
Jasper approached me, "Bother me? You wouldn't have been bothering me," he raked his fingers through his hair, "You don't deserve this Bella."
My head was beginning to spin. I touched my hand to my forehead, "I think I need to lay down, Jas."
He sighed, "Are you alright?"
I nodded lightly, blinking a few times, "Yeah, I just went a little heavy on the Pinot Grigio."
Jasper snorted a brief laugh at me, breaking the seriousness of the moment, "How many did you have?"
I held up three fingers. He continued to laugh at me, "Come on," he extended his hand to me, and guided me to the living room. I sat myself down on the couch, as jasper shut the lights off. He began pacing the floor in front of me, mumbling to himself.
I watched him for a few moments before speaking, "You're going to burn a whole in my carpet, you know."
He paused his pattern and met my eyes. "I'm staying. Until he gets here, I'm staying."
I shook my head at him, "No, I'm fine, really. It would only upset Edward when he does get home."
Jasper's eyes burned into me, "You shouldn't be here alone in this state. I am not interested in Edward's feelings, particular not when he's the cause. He should be home with his wife," He took a deep breath, in an attempt to calm down, "Swan, the only way I'll leave is if you ask me to, because you want me to. Otherwise, I'll be right here."
My eyes watered all over again at Jasper's words. I shrugged my shoulders, really not wanting to be alone but nonetheless wanting to avoid Edward's wrath. But before I could make up my mind on the subject, I heard a car door shut in the driveway.
Thank you so much for reading. Sorry for the cliff hanger but I will be trying to update more frequently. I hope everyone is doing well.