Smith managed to recover her wits as Caboose served up a hearty breakfast. "As I was saying, it is strictly against the law for a human to engage in such activity with a demi-human during their Homestay if she is a virgin-"

"Why?" Caboose asked curiously.

Smith paused, having not expected that question. "Excuse me?"

"Why is it against the law?" Caboose clarified. "It seems like a silly thing to classify as harm. Tucker never seemed to think of it that way."

Smith rubbed the bridge of her nose. She hated going over this part of the treaty. "Demi-humans have a much higher female-to-male ratio than humans do, and the various races of demi-human are much more strongly connected to their instincts and…animal nature." She cleared her throat awkwardly. "During early contact between humans and demi-humans, some unscrupulous humans took advantage of these facts to…tame and domesticate some demi-humans. Their governments…did not take this well." She silently prayed Caboose wouldn't ask anymore-

A loud crunch drew Smith's attention to the kitchen. A cast iron frying pan had been reduced to a crumpled ball of metal in Caboose's hand. "…can I get a new frying pan?" he asked hopefully. "That story got me kind of angry, and I think I broke this one." He opened his hand, and powdered flakes of metal fell to the ground. "Yeah, definitely broken. I'll get the dustpan."

Smith swallowed convulsively. At least I never have to worry about him mistreating any girls placed with him…intentionally, she thought to herself. Still, I'd better make sure any girls I send to him are either incredibly durable, or very obvious that he should be gentle with them. Clearing her throat, she spoke aloud again. "At any rate, you can see why it became a significant part of the treaty that any such contact between humans and demi-humans in human lands is…strictly regulated, and expressly forbidden with those who come here…inexperienced."

"Yeah," Caboose agreed easily as he continued to prepare Miia's breakfast plate. "If anyone treated one of my seventeen sisters like that, I would have words with them." His voice suddenly turned much darker, more menacing and resonant as he lifted an exceptionally sharp knife. "And when I was through, they would have no words left." His voice then returned to normal. "More coffee?"

"P-please," Smith managed to stammer.

"So what happens if the law is broken?" Caboose asked curiously.

Smith steadied herself to respond. "If a human offering a homestay were to do such a thing to a demi-human they were hosting, they would be arrested and their 'guest' deported back to their country of origin. In your case, though, it would just be the deportation, since you have diplomatic immunity as a guest hero on planet, on the condition you carry no active weapons with you." Though with how strong you are, you plainly don't need any,she added silently.

"So humans can't hurt demi-humans, and demi-humans can't hurt humans," Caboose concluded. "What about Freckles?"

"Beg pardon?" Smith asked curiously.

"Under the law, is he a human or a demi-human?" Caboose clarified.

Smith blinked. "I…I'm not sure," she concluded. "I suppose it would depend whose orders he was following, since he's technically classified as a weapon."

"And in autonomous mode for defending the base?" Freckles inquired robotically.

Smith jumped slightly, having forgotten Freckles was there with how quiet he'd been, and having forgotten he was intelligent. "Then you would qualify as a security system, and the one injured would be at fault."

"Understood," Freckles proclaimed before shifting upright.

"So you understand what I'm saying, Caboose?" Smith asked carefully.

"Yes," Caboose confirmed. "No Bum chika bum bum with Miia, or she gets taken away."

Smith sighed. That was probably the best she was going to get. "So what do you intend to do today?" she asked curiously.

"I dunno," Caboose answered easily. "We usually stay indoors."

Smith frowned. "The whole point of the homestay arrangement is to introduce the guest to human society, and vice versa. You really should go out and about some of the time."

"Okay!" Caboose agreed readily as Miia came in, wearing a pink overshirt that clung to her wet body. "Miia! How would you like to take a walk around town today? We could even get ice cream, and maybe churros!"

Miia's eyes lit up excitedly. "Darling, you're asking me on a date?" she squealed happily. "Yes!" With that shout, she threw herself at Caboose, wrapping him in a hug with her arms and coils.

"Yay!" Caboose declared happily as he started making his breakfast portion. "I have no idea what you just said, but you're happy! I did good!"

Smith sighed ruefully. As good a job as this was doing for the cause overall, she wondered if it was worth the headaches on top of her already heavy paperwork load.

Caboose smiled as Miia sing-songed about how happy she was to be on a date with him. As they walked, he read over the HUD of the rules regarding such outings. Though in truth, it was only one rule.

Stay with her and assist her at all times.

This was apparently so for all demi-human species, with only a few exceptions, but Caboose didn't understand what an 'exception' was, so he decided to ignore that part for now. He also didn't understand the second rule. What was a 'love hotel' anyway? …maybe he'd ask Polt about it if she was available to run together that afternoon.

So far, the date had gone wonderfully, if Miia's expression was anything to go by. They had gone to a diner, Caboose had managed to win a snake plushy for her at an arcade, and they'd taken photos together.

In fact, there was only one thing Miia found somewhat disappointing about the date. "Darling, how come you never take your armor off?" she asked curiously. "You didn't even take it off to eat.

Caboose hesitated. "…ever since I was little, people have acted strangely around me when they see my face, or my body," he explained softly. "I didn't like it. When I joined the Blues, I got this armor, and no one could see me. All they saw was Blue. That made me happy. I like being Blue. I like being Caboose. I don't want to be 'Mike' again."

Miia smiled softly. She could well understand his desire to hide. She was often judged by humans for having the lower body of a snake. "It's okay, Darling," she reassured him softly as she wrapped her arms around his shoulders. "You'll always be Darling, be Caboose, to me. And when you're ready, I promise I won't judge you for your looks."

"Thank you, Miia," Caboose replied warmly. "Sorry we couldn't do karaoke. Those rooms were too small."

Miia couldn't stop the sweat drop on the back of her head at that. "It's alright. I wasn't really having that much fun there, anyway." Caboose's solution to the small private karaoke room had been to ask Freckles to come in and sing a song. That had not ended well.

"Oh!" Caboose piped up suddenly. "That store is for all species!" He pointed to a sign outside a boutique that declared, 'All Species Welcome! Approved by Interspecies Exchange Bill Assessment! Come on in!'

Squealing happily, Miia eagerly pulled Caboose into the…lingerie boutique. Caboose continued to smile happily under his mask, showing absolutely no sign of discomfort. He vaguely remembered his sisters dragging him along to shop for such things the few times there was enough money for such niceties. A family of twenty generally didn't have that much spare cash to spread around, and there were a lot of hand-me-downs. He'd developed surprising sewing skills helping his sisters fix up older outfits to look newer and fit better. He wondered if he could still do that. He hoped they were getting by without his soldier pay, since the Freelancer Program that paid the Reds and Blues didn't exist anymore…

Since Caboose was so lost in his idle thoughts, he didn't notice any stares he was getting, and nearly didn't notice Miia approaching with a pink and purple bra of two different designs. "Hey, Darling, which do you think looks better? I don't wear bras too often, so I don't know." She reached up to the neckline of her shirt to pull it down, intending to offer proof of her 'not wearing bras often'.

Before she could, however, Caboose immediately started talking. "The pink one with white frills presents an innocent, cute appearance, while the dark purple one with the black lace is more sultry," he recited from his memory of his sisters talking about such things. "I don't know about better, though. I think that has more to do with proper sizing than colors or design…but I think the pink and white goes better with your red hair and scales. Doesn't clash as much as the purple."

Miia's eyes widened in surprise. "You know a lot about this!" she gasped in awe.

"I helped my sisters with this a lot," Caboose offered readily. "I picked up a few things. Oh! Be sure to try it on before buying, no matter what the size says. Measurements are never exact unless they are custom. At least, that's what my oldest sister always told the others."

"Can you help me try it on?" Miia asked, setting the purple one aside and hanging onto the pink one.

"Okay!" Caboose agreed happily. "My middle sis said I was great with bra clasps!"

After helping Miia try on the bra and discovering that she liked it – or possibly liked having an item of intimate apparel she could ask Caboose to help her put on and remove – the pair continued on their walk through the city. As they were walking, a pair of humans staggered out of an alleyway. The man was pale-skinned with scraggly brown-blonde hair, dressed in purple, brown, and black. The woman was over-tanned with bleached blonde hair and somewhat oversized lips, dressed in red, green, and grey. Both seemed somewhat tipsy.

Caboose and Miia were both ready to ignore the pair as they walked along. "Say, Darling-" Miia began.

"Whoa!" the man suddenly shouted. "What is that?" The pair began to laugh. "She called him darling!"

"Talk about gross!" the woman declared as the pair continued to laugh.

Miia's body began to tense, and her tail started to shake like a rattle.

"Hello!" Caboose suddenly greeted the pair warmly. "Nice to meet you! I didn't know there were so many kinds of demi-humans!" He turned towards the man. "Are you her homestay host?"

The laughter of the pair immediately turned to anger. "Oy!" the man yelled out. "Are you calling my girl a freak?"

"You said it," Caboose responded quickly. "I asked about a homestay. Oh! Is she your homestay? I can't really tell which of you is which."

The man snarled angrily. "You're gonna pay for that!" he roared out, lunging forward with his fist pulled back.

"Darling!" Miia called out worriedly.

The man's fist connected with a sickening crunch…and the man's eyes widened as he let out a cry of pain, clutching his crushed fingers.

"Demi-humans aren't supposed to hurt humans," Caboose pointed out. "I know it's hard to tell under the armor, but I am human."

"We are human!" the woman snapped out as she rushed to the man's side.

"…oh," Caboose responded calmly, his voice having turned menacing. "Then you were just being mean to Miia because you could. Freckles!"

The ground shook as Freckles marched up, the pair of humans shrinking back in fear at his approach. "Yes, Captain Caboose?" he inquired.

"How can I tell someone they are incredibly ugly without giving offense?" Caboose inquired carefully, his voice still menacing.

"Targets acquired," Freckles declared, locking onto the pair.

"Hmm…a missile impact might improve their appearance…" Caboose grinned under his helmet as the pair turned and ran. "Freckles, sic 'em!"

"Engaging pursuit!" Freckles declared as he took off after his fleeing prey.

Caboose turned back to Miia. "So!" he continued in his normal voice. "Ice cream?"