Korr blinked at Caboose for a time. "You...do not...understand the question?" he repeated, hoping for clarification that made sense.
"Nope!" Caboose confirmed happily.
Noticing Korr grinding his teeth, Parei decided to intervene before things grew worse. "Which part, precisely?"
"Lain," Caboose explained happily. "Why would it be important if Polt and I built roads? ...that's what 'lain with' means, right?"
"In a manner of speaking," Pala muttered with a snort, her amusement briefly managing to reduce her hostility.
Korr's tense expression faded back to neutral. "Ah, colloquial issues. You are from off world, after all." He rubbed his chin as he thought how to rephrase his question. "Have you copulated with Polt?"
"Cop-you-later?" Caboose asked in confusion. "But we're not in law enforcement."
"Were you in a relationship during the last full moon?" Parei interrupted, seeking a more direct way of approaching the issue.
"Oh yeah!" Caboose declared happily. "Well, I think we were. We were good friends before that and went on walkies together mornings and evenings-"
Polt's eyes widened as she noticed Korr and Parei's eyes hardening at that terminology, even as Pala's glowed with wicked glee.
"But that full moon Polt wasn't feeling well," Caboose continued. "When she told me it was because of the moon, I was going to destroy it so she felt better, but she said the feeling wasn't a bad thing."
The fear on her family's faces at how casually Caboose discussed destroying the moon in no way brought comfort to Polt. The fact that Eldest Palaka showed no visible reaction beyond her hand covering her mouth wasn't much comfort either.
"So I helped her deal with what the moon was doing to her instead!" Caboose declared happily. "And that night she taught me what love is! And that's how she became First Lieutenant!" Caboose nodded happily even as Agent Smith's jaw dropped, looking between horrified and bemused, though leaning more towards the former.
"Freckle, just vaporize me now," Polt murmured under her breath in a whimper, hopefully only loud enough to reach her own ears. While everything of what Caboose had said was technically accurate, it was the absolute worst way he could have explained it to her family, and in the worst order.
Korr looked torn between trying to rip Caboose apart for 'turning his daughter into a pet' or turning Polt over his knee for 'taking advantage of an innocent'. Parei looked like she was about to faint. Pala was glancing between Polt and Caboose as though they'd both grown an extra head each just to make out while carrying on the conversation...as well as trying to determine who best to hide behind when the inevitable explosion occurred.
Palaka burst into uncontrollable laughter, catching everyone off guard. "Oh goodness, I haven't had a good laugh like that in ages," she managed to get out as she calmed down. "Not since my first mate passed in the ancient wars, he always knew how to make me lose control…" She turned to Cerea. "Keybearer, am I correct in assuming that Caboose, while gentle and loving, is intellectually of greater similarity to male centaurs than other species?"
Cerea sighed ruefully. "Master holds great wisdom in him...but his intelligence oft times is indeed sorely lacking."
"I make do," Caboose allowed warmly. "As long as I try my best, don't let my mistakes get me down, and am surrounded by people who care about me and understand me, then I'll do okay."
Seeing several stunned looks, Palaka chuckled to herself. "I see what you mean. Young Caboose, am I correct in assuming that Polt 'teaching you about love' occurred before you aided her with the moon's effect?"
"Uh huh!" Caboose confirmed happily. "Kuku had been talking to me about marriage, and I'd wanted to make all the girls I cared about my marriage friends, but they had trouble explaining things. So I asked Polt, since she'd been able to explain lots of things to me when we were on walkies-"
"Is a leash involved on 'walkies'?" Palaka interrupted.
"Only when Polt holds it. I get lost and turned around easily."
Palaka smirked as she saw Korr and Parei starting to calm down, and Pala beginning to pout. "Now, you were saying about Polt explaining love and marriage to you?"
"Oh! Right!" Caboose gathered his thoughts. "Polt told me being marriage friends required love, but didn't know how to explain love to me. So I thought about how I felt about all the friends I wanted to be my marriage friends, and asked her if that was love. She told me it was, which was a big relief for me, because now I knew I could say I love them all."
"So what's she doing here?" Pala interrupted, pointing to Zombina.
[It was determined from your discussion in the gym that this discussion would involve the nature of the bonds between Captain Caboose, First Lieutenant Polt, and the other Blues,] Polt's Freckle explained. [This unit contacted the unit assigned to Second Lieutenant Zombina, requesting her presence in case her input would be viable.]
Palaka's eyebrow shot up. "And how did you come to be Second Lieutenant?" she asked archly.
Zombina chuckled, her tone between proud and nervous. "Well, same way Polt became First Lieutenant, more or less. But…" She squirmed a little.
[Captain Caboose,] Zombina's Freckle intoned, [please temporarily disable audio receptors in helmet.]
"Okay!" Caboose agreed happily. "...how do I do that?"
[Activating favorite music track,] Caboose's Freckle intoned. Caboose began to bob his head to a tune only he could hear.
Zombina let out a sigh of relief, knowing she wouldn't have to explain it in front of Caboose. "It...started with this," she said calmly as she pulled out the small jar Caboose had given her at the start of their date. "As a gift for a date, he made this for me. Mortuary putty altered so I could use it as makeup, to cover up the stitches and scars. Not to hide them...but to show the beauty of the girl I used to be." She stared at the small jar. "I don't have blood anymore...but when he applied it so gently, I felt my face heat up. When I saw him bring out who I used to be...I swear I felt my heart beat again. And...and when we went to the hotel and he held me in his arms, I…" She blinked her eyes...and everyone was stunned to see tears there, tears she should not have been able to produce. "I felt alive…"
Without warning, Caboose reached his hand out to her. Stunned, she reached out and took it. "You...you heard?" she asked in shock.
"I can't hear you still," Caboose answered warmly. "But I saw tears. I thought you needed comfort."
Agent Smith chuckled softly. "Casts him walking on water during his date with Miia in a new light," she murmured thoughtfully. Seeing Palaka giving her a curious look, she smirked. "He claimed he knew where the stones were...on the bottom."
"Well...you certainly are interesting, then," Palaka observed. Seeing Caboose turn towards her, she knew the music had been turned off. "However...I wish to test you as a warrior, if you have no objection."
"I like sparring!" Caboose declared happily.
Lala stared at the door into the room Caboose and Palaka had gone into to spar. Palaka had insisted on privacy for it, so everyone but Cerea - who was still bedridden - and Cerea's mother who kept her in bed were gathered around to await the outcome of the sparring. Lala, however, was less interested in what happened within than in what she'd overheard in the infirmary...and what she was putting together now.
Caboose was a mystery to her. One who walked endlessly in the land between life and death, the reaper always at his heels yet never able to claim him. Shrugging off things that would be lethal to other mortals as though they happened everyday - which they did - and were of no moment. This part was mystery...but two new facts pointed towards a possible answer, one she would think about. To walk easily on water suggested the blood of a god in his veins, which would explain his ability to shrug off the reaper's scythe. To bring the dead back to life, if even for a moment, said he was able to tap that power. The question Lala was left with...which god was Caboose tied to? The answer to that would tell her what to do next.
Without warning, the door burst open and Palaka rushed out. Both her inner and outer kimonos were folded in her arms, revealing a battle leotard underneath that hugged her figure well enough to show that she was in at least as good condition as any of her present descendants. "Goodness!" she gasped out, her cheeks bright red. "No wonder you staked a claim so quickly, Polt!"
"Huh?" Miia and several others demanded in confusion.
"You...you asked to spar against him without his armor?" Polt managed to gasp out, causing several of those gathered to gasp.
"And he agreed to it," Palaka managed to say, fanning herself with one hand. "Woof! Felt like I was centuries younger just getting a whiff of him. Was afraid I'd lose control if I actually tried to grapple…" She glanced towards Polt. "I don't suppose he'd-"
"I don't date family members of marriage friends!" Caboose stated as he stepped out, back in his armor. "Miia says that would be awkward."
"A pity," Palaka allowed as Polt sagged with relief. The idea of trying to compete with the Grand-Eldest for Caboose… "Well, I see no reason not to sign, so bring me the paperwork while I still have control of myself, Agent Smith."
Polt's eyes popped open in surprise. "G-Grand-Eldest? You're going to sign?"
"If being with him makes you feel a fraction of what I felt with my first mate - or anything like what seeing him without his armor made me feel just now - I'm not about to let anyone else in the tribes try and complain," Palaka confirmed as she signed the papers Agent Smith presented her with. She then pulled Polt into a warm embrace. "Little one...be happy, be well, be loved...and send us baby pictures." Before Polt had a chance to responde to any of that, she grabbed Pala by the ear and began to march out. "Now let's go before Pala gets a whiff in there and starts an incident. Her self-control…"
As Pala yowled as she was dragged out, Parei gave Polt a warm embrace before following the Grand-Eldest. Korr gave Polt a proud pat on her shoulder, then followed at as well.
"Here you go!" Caboose offered helpfully as he pushed a plush couch up behind Polt.
"Thanks love…" Polt managed to get out before fainting in relief, right onto the provided couch.