A Witch's Shinobi 3
Chapter 3-Filler Chapter
Sunagakure no Sato,
"Who wants ice cream?" Kakashi asked.
"ME!"— the kids jumped up and down even Gaara is drooling.
The silver haired man gave them an eye smile before unsealing his 'special' scroll.
A poof later, eight tall glasses of Ice cream (monster size) appeared on the table. The chibis are vibrating in effort to not jump and grab each cup.
"Strawberry for Mika-chan and Temari-chan, chocolate for Sasuke-kun and Shikamaru, cookies and cream for Gaara-kun and Blueberries for Kankuro and Naruto-kun while Black Forest is mine." Kakashi gave the kids their ice cream, making the chibi's eyes sparkle—and the fuck, is that a bunny on Mika-chan's background?!—"Dig in."
"Papa, you're the best!" Mika exclaimed as she took a bite of her ice cream sundae. "Mmm! Delicious! Nothing beats the desert sun's heat beside ice cream!"
"Likewise." Gaara agreed as he took a bite of his ice cream.
Happy humming's were heard inside the Hokage Mansion as the kids happily ate their dessert. The Yondaime Kazekage Sabaku no Rasa is torn being horrified or amused upon the display.
"Anyway, does Temari-chan and Kankuro remembers?" Naruto asked out of the blue.
"I'm actually asking for an Oblivate but knowing you two, you won't allow us to forget." Temari replied. "Its more bits and pieces but enough for me."
"Same with me. But please, just erase that time in Kazekage Tower? Please?" Kankuro begged.
"Of course not." The sharingan users replied immediately making the Puppet User cry on the floor.
"You three are so mean!"
"Ya know, Daddy is the only one needed along Neji then we're back to the normal team." Mika commented as she inhaled her ice cream. "Wanna spread some chaos!"
"When and where? Do we have proper gears? Do I need to sign anything? Who are the ones we will troll?" Naruto asked, his ever present Magical calligraphy pen is out.
" Alternate Kannabi Bridge. Yes, we do and its more than enough. Nothing, I already did and Hari. We are going to Troll several Konoha Shinobi and several Iwa Nins but more Leaf Shinobi. We can invite some Suna nin if we would like." The ravenette answered. "Whose with me?!"
"ME!"
0000
Universe 78009,
Near Kannabi Bridge,
Mika and Co arrived in an alternate world. They are all in their adult forms (22) and wearing their old gears.
"So, who's ready for some chaos?" Mika asked, adjusting her military cap with Konoha insignia. "We are going in twos, I think.''
"I believe I would accompany Sasuke towards my younger self's location. Mika and Naruto, go to the cave. Shikamaru along Sand Siblings, you will be our eyes and rescue team." Kakashi told them.
"Alright." Shikamaru along the Sand Siblings replied.
"What shall we do when we saw Tou-chan?" Naruto asked.
"Hiraishin the hell out and confused them. The chaos will start once Obito is well enough and we could prevent Rin-chan's death. I had something for the Three tails and we are Seal Masters, ya know?" Mika answered as Naruto gave his father-in-law an eye roll which earn him a head slap.
"Ow! C'mon! They would not confused me with Tou-chan!"
All eyed the Hokage Robe he's wearing.
"Minus the fact you are wearing your cloak that reads 'Nanadaime? With the same design as the Yondaime even he is not the Yondaime yet? I don't think so. Use the orange and black one, Darling!" Mika told her husband.
"Okay, okay."
Once they wore their hitai-ates and checked the equipment, they all scattered.
Cave,
"Naru, destroy the rock!" Mika ordered which her beloved husband did.
Obito Uchiha is still conscious even if half of his body is buried under the rock and with an empty eye socket. Mika fed the thirteen year old Chuunin with Draught of Living Death before starting on re growing the destroyed body parts.
"Good thing Reverse System is available for me to use, ttebane. If not, this is going to be painful." Mika commented as Naruto cut his wrist and mixed his blood and chakra on the vial of Pepper Up potion.
"Indeed. How long this will take?"
"More than five minutes. I just need to regrow his eyes so chibi Kakashi won't need to return his Jounin Gift."
Main Kannabi Bridge,
"SENSEI! STOP CACKLING LIKE A MAD MAN OR ELSE I'LL TELL RURU-SAN THAT YOU ATE THE REMAINING BANNA PUDDING!" Sasuke shouted as he watched Kakashi having an ongoing contest with one Namikaze Minato while chibi Kakashi gape in sheer disbelief on the older Uchiha.
"Sasuke! Its been a while since I have this kind of fun!" Kakashi gave his adopted son an eye smile as he slit a random Iwa nins neck.
"I don't care and I won't be cleaning blood on your clothes. Again." Sasuke took both chibi Kakashi and Nohara Rin and unleash Susanoo on the battle field. His Eternal Mangekyo Sharingan swirled in life. "And stop playing with the Dobe's father."
"Ehh, whichever way we will land in T and I later."
The Uchiha raised an eyebrow.
"Oh, you mean you are going to land in T and I." Sasuke said. "And once Ruru-san heard about this. . ." he trailed off.
"YOURE SO GOING TO BE IN THE DOG HOUSE FOR A MONTH, BAKASHI-SENSEI!"
Shikamaru's Location,
"Mika is coming along the injured. Gaara, kill the idiots.'' Shikamaru ordered as Temari and Kankuro collected the injured Konoha Shinobis. "Temari, how many injured?"
"Two hundred fifty and counting, Shikamaru! We also counted dead but none of them are Konohas'." Temari replied.
"Hm," the Nanadaime Head Strategist snapped his fingers. The floating green pillow next to him transformed into bunch of knives and stabbed the Iwa nin trying to assassinate him. "Troublesome. Michaela."
"Good work on activating the perfect cube. I'll handle it from here, Nara-sama." Mika glance on her partner. "Could you please stand by Nanadaime-sama's side along the Crow."
"Of course, Hime-sama." Shikamaru bow his head politely before vanishing.
The ravenette glance then nodded to the Sand Siblings.
"My name is Michaela Hatake-Uchiha, I am a Healer and please listen to me. The idiots who would try to escape the healing would be bound by chains and no, I'm not into BDSM even if we had the same bust size of Lady Senju." Even with paranoia, snickers could be heard in the area.
"You look like an Uzumaki." One of the ninja commented, a Shiranui by the looks of it.
"Oh come on, take a look, will ya?" Mika decide to humor her patients as she unleashed an army of Kage Bushin. "I knew of Kushina Uzumaki. We are not the same. Look closely in here," she pointed her black hair with white highlights on the bangs. "In here," yup, her violet eyes are more almond shape. "and most of all, here," she made her boobs bounce a bit.
"See? We're different."
Laughter spread in the entire Healing area even if they are surrounded with death and destruction.
Konoha,
"Why do I feel I wanted to kill someone brutally that would make even the Nine Tail fox proud and horrified at the same time?" Jounin Kushina Uzumaki asked out of the blue while eating some ramen with Mikoto Uchiha.
"You're just thinking too much, Kushina." Mikoto replied.
"Maybe," the red head agreed.
0000
Mika rolled her eyes as two blondes appeared in front of her, bathing in blood and chunk.
"We are going to burn those clothes. Report."
"Iwa nins are neutralized, Hime-sama. Kannabi Bridge destruction is made possible of Rasengan of Namikaze Minato and my Rasenshuriken. Varia Squad were all un injured as Cloud and Storm manage to kill several kumo assassins. How about you, Hime?" Naruto reported.
"Team Minato's Uchiha Obito is now Stable. However, regrowing half of his body along his eyes—complete with Sharingan is a pain in the ass procedure. I may not be Tsunade-hime, I did my best. All three hundred back up Shinobi of Konoha are well and healthy. If Iwa is missing its remaining five percent squads, you could blame that on me. They're so annoying,. Dattebane." Mika shrugged her shoulders, ignoring the gaping Team Minato. "Are you sure you are un injured, Sky? Do remember I would not hesitate to chain you in bed."
"You know, darling, I really don't mind the last part," Naruto wiggled his eyebrows as a flirty smile adorned his lips., ignoring the chokes of disbelief and groan of annoyance of their audience. Waltzing towards his wife, he whispered in her ear. "Especially you in one of your sexy Nurse Uniform~"
The ravenette giggled.
"Oh my, oh my, how naughty, My Lord. Why don't you behave so I might give you a little reward later on, hmm?" half lidded emerald green eyes full of lust stared on his reddish blue ones. "Will you?"
The slightly shorter blonde growled under his breath before pulling his wife for a soul shattering kiss.
"Fuck, they're at it again." Shikamaru groaned before firing a Suiton on the couple who were about to start ripping clothes. Ignoring indignant yells from the said couple. ."Stop making out in the middle of the battle field!"
"I'm horny, shut up!" Naruto/Mika shouted.
"I don't care!" the Nara replied. "Focus on the mission first, Sky-sama, Hime-sama then I don't care if you use Tsukuyomi for your more kinky methods! "
The Uzumaki-Namikaze(Potter-Black) couple stop grumbling.
0000
The return in Konoha were met with shock and awe since Mika decided to use a portkey for fast delivery. Once every Shinobi is send on the hospital, Naruto gleefully gave the report of Varia Squad on his alternate father's hands. Once the spectacle wearing blonde gave the said written report, it poof out of existence revealing it's a shadow clone all along.
"We do not have a Varia Squad, Minato-kun. If we had, I would never send your Team in the first place." The Sandaime Hokage told the Team Minato after their oral report. "Who is the Leader of this Squad?"
"According to the Nara, it was one Hatake-Namikaze Kakashi. His team is made of one Naruto Uzumaki-Namikaze, Mika Hatake-Uchiha-Namikaze, Sasuke Black-Uchiha and Nara Shikamaru. The other three are called Sand Siblings whose names are Subaku no Gaara, Temari and Kankuro. By observation, all of them are S-Class Shinobi's and I had a guess that Naruto Uzumaki-Namikaze is a Jinchuuriki. What Biju is still unknown." Minato replied.
"Where are they?"
"Ichikaru's?"
000
Ichikaru Ramen Stand,
"Oi, Teuchi-jiji! Five bowls of miso ramen, kept 'em coming!" two cheerful voices made the ramen owner smile as a pair of blonde and raven couple appeared and sat down the stool.
"Ya know, its so unfair that the two of you could inhale so much ramen not get fat." Temari said as she sat beside her brothers.
"Why don't you try converting those carbs into your chakra system like the Akamichi's? That's what I do add to the fact that most of my attacks are wide scales." Mika replied after swallowing her ramen.
Temari gave her a dead pan look.
"Do I look like a chakra tank on you? I swear you focused all your fat on your boobs."
"Oi, don't insult my boobs, Temari! My son feed on this, ya know?" the ravenette gave an air of superiority, making her Squad mates laugh at her.
"I swear the kid is about to faint when you hugged him." Sasuke dove on the counter when Mika threw a kunai on his head. "What?! its true! Bolt has been complaining about suffocation and how its bad to be placed on his death certificate if ever."
"My son will only die in old age, Teme. Blame his mother on that." Naruto rolled his eyes then froze.
"Hey, did anyone of us brought some ryo?"
Collective blinking was his answer before turning to the owner.
"Teuchi-jiji. . . you do accept hard gold, don't you?"
000
Minato was in the end of his patience. Its been a week and he still cannot find even the hair of the VARIA SQUAD. Its already bad enough they are skipping around, there are even rumors that HE is cheating on Kushina!
How prosperous!
"You know, I'm not Minato! See those whisker marks that my wife loves along the eyeglasses? This is getting annoying, dattebayo!" speaking of the devil, the older blonde finally caught Naruto.
"FISHCAKE!" He shouted, making the said Ramen named kid glared at him.
"Fuck you, Tou-chan. My name means Maelstrom, not fishcake even if I worship the said food of the Gods and the National Food of Uzushiogakure! " The Jinchuuriki huffed and folded his arms on his chest. "I know I inherited your coloring but c'mon? we're not that similar."
Minato raised an eyebrow.
"Because of you, my friends are accusing me on cheating Kushina."
"Kaa-chan had Adamantine Chains. You had a Death Wish if you try on cheating her. . . not that you would do since you are head over heels in love with my mother." Naruto rolled his eyes. "Did you already propose before picking out your dream house?"
Seeing the older blonde flush in embarrassment, he gave him a deadpan look. "Figures. Kakashi-sensei and Ero-Sennin speaks the truth. My father is an oblivious idiot which I inherited until Mika-chan beat self-preservation in my head. Let me tell you, it took a month before it was ready."
"Followed by three broken ribs, an concussion that even the old fox had been difficult to heal and too many torture scenes Anko Neechan will love." Mika appeared next to her husband followed by the rest of VARIA Squad. "Hi, father in law! How do you do?"
"Father-in-law?!" Minato exclaimed.
"It seems Dobe's father is also a Dobe." Sasuke rolled his eyes as he scratch his hair. "Does all geniuses are like this?"
"Hey, Bolt and Rica came out normal, 'ttebane!" Mika exclaimed.
"On older generation, Mika-chan. And even in ninja standards, your spawn is on another category all together. Why did I assign Bolt in the genin Team of Sarada and Itachi is beyond me."
"Because we made you drunk so hard that you found yourself naked in the Forest of Death. I did warn you not to drunk up straight Asgardian Mead, Teme." Naruto answered.
"That was you?!" the Uchiha glared at his best friend.
"Yes, me. Your wife even had a video stash somewhere and everyone –I mean everyone had a copy." The eyeglasses wearing blonde cackled as Sasuke chased him, CHIDORIon hand.
"COME BACK HERE, DOBE! I'LL FINISH WHAT I SHOULD HAVE IN THE VALLEY OF THE END!"
"Onii-chan! Bring back my husband half alive!" Mika shouted as she heard the usual Chidori & Rasengan duo. "They will cool down in three hours. So, what up, Father-in-law?"
"The Hokage wants to speak with you." Minato replied.
Mika blinked. "But you are already speaking to us, Yondaime-sama."
"Please stop joking, Uchiha-san!"
"I became Uzumaki-Namikaze when I married your son, Papa Mina. You can call me Mika or Michaela like anyone else, ya know?" the raven smiled at him. "Let's take this on the Hokage Tower, okay? Sorry for giving you too much stress, Papa. We just want to lighten the mood."
"Lighten, my foot. I bet my entire fortune that it never crossed your mind that you are making his hair turned gray." Gaara commented.
"Shut up, Raccoon."
"Make me, Slug."
"Did I just saw a silhouette of a slug and a raccoon behind them?" Minato asked in a deadpan voice at the only sane looking shinobi in the group.
At Temari since Kankuro were pulling a sleeping Shikamaru via –is that a floating pillow?!
Shikaku would give his first born to have that.
"Minions, time to go~" Kakashi commented, hiding his Platinum Icha Icha. The said minions paused and straighten since they knew the silver haired Rokudaime is being serious.
"Hai!"
0000
Hokage Tower,
"Hiya, Nonno~! You called us according to Papa Mina?" Mika skipped towards the table and sat on its edge.
"Indeed, milady. May we know who are you? Also, we thank you for helping Team Minato and my shinobis." Hiruzen spoke.
Mika giggled.
"No problem, Nonno. We are all bored to death and wanting unleash from frustrations, dattebane~. I feel better now when I unleashed several high powered jutsus. My body makes too much these days."
"Are you sure you're not pregnant? You're like that when you are carrying Bolt." Shikamaru asked.
"No, she's not. I could have known immediately and her own Magic would tell her so." Sasuke replied, his Rinnegan activated.
"Oh, you're here. And stop with the pregnancy talk. Its too early for me to be pregnant once again." Mika waved her hand. "Where's my husband, Nii-chan?"
"I threw him to your Mother-in-law."
Everyone turned their eyes on him.
"You are plain Evil, Sasuke-kun. Throwing your brother-in-law at Kushina-neesan." Kakashi spoke.
"Hn,"
"Please stop bullying my husband."
"But it's my hobby."
"Choose another one."
"MICHAELA!" Naruto's scream alerted them as the Nanadaime Hirashin the fuck towards his wife followed by an insane laughing red head. "Help me! Dad, your wife is insane!"
"Mama Shina is the best, dattebane~" Mika commented as the said red head turned her attention at her. "Hello~"
"You are the one said to be Minato's mistress." Kushina said.
"Unfortunately, I never understand why they keep comparing you to me, Mama Shina. After all, we do not have the same bust size."
". . . ."
"Daughter-in-law or not, I'm going to kill you, dattebane!" Kushina shouted while being restrained by the two blondes and with Gaara's sand.
"Why are you offended, Mama Shina? My boobs only grew this big after I gave birth to my eldest son." Mika asked innocently.
"Mika-chan, stop teasing Mom!" Naruto plead.
"'Ugh, fine~"
"The two of you are insane." Shikamaru gave the Uchiha twins (Term for Sasuke and Mika) a head slap each. "Bad Uchiha. Bad."
"We are not dogs, NARA!"
"While they are trying to kill each other, may I know why you want to speak with us, Sandaime-sama?" Kakashi spoke.
"We wanted to know what is your motive here. I admit we are thankful for your meddling in the Third Shinobi War. However," Hiruzen stared at his mismatched eyes. "We does not know your objective."
"The kids are bored." The silver haired male replied honestly. "In addition, their bodies are trying to accommodate their adult chakra systems since the whole gang are thrown back in their younger bodies. I wont tell the whole story but the gist of it, our original world dimension is been destroyed. With Mika-chan and Naruto's final attempt, we manage to go back in time. In another dimension since our original one is erased. Permanently."
"Then that means. . ." Both Minato and Kushina stared at Mika and Naruto.
"Indeed, Bolt and Rica. . .don't worry, we are working our best so when they are born, everything will be okay." Naruto wrapped his arm around his wife and kissed her temple. "Along the next generation. . "
"And wrapped some loose ends in Magical Britain." Mika entwined her fingers with Naruto. "They are part of my past that I want to end early."
0000
In the middle of the talks, Uchiha Fugaku along Mikoto and Shikaku Nara appeared.
"Tsk, troublesome." Shikamaru commented who was taking a nap via Shima—his pillow—beside Temari.
"Hi, Father," Sasuke greeted his parents. "Mother."
"Hi, Uncle Fugaku, Aunt Mikoto~" Mika waved her hand. "Ohh, Ita-chan!"
"Are we talking about my brother?"
"Of course not unless we magically had your son in here along Sarada and Bolt, why not?"
"Stop cheating, Gaara!'' Naruto shouted as he threw his cards on the table. "And no using Sharingan, mangekyo and most of all EMS in Poker!"
"What are you saying, Ruto? I don't have EMS." Sasuke smirked as he laid his cards coolly. " . . I had the Rinnegan. Royal Straight Flush."
"CHEATER!" Kankuro and Naruto dived Sasuke who casually did a substitution justu with Shikamaru.
"Gaah! Naruto! Kankuro!"
"Mooh, I LOST." Mika pouted as she skipped towards Kakashi who was having an intense discussion with Kushina and Minato. "Daddy, I'm bored~"
"Take a nap. We are leaving in three hours since Harri said we need to go back." Kakashi's fingers automatically rake her hair as she used his lap as her pillow.
"Okay~"
Minato chuckled softly as Mika immediately fell asleep. Sapphire blue eyes met Fugaku's own who cannot decide if he would disown Sasuke or not.
"Changing the future in order to save them. . . it's such a hard task, am I correct?"
"Indeed, Father." Kakashi replied as he kissed Mika's forehead. "But we will do our best to save our new future. . . for the sake of the next generation."
00000
"This week is just a filler," Mika complained as they returned to their Konoha.
"But do admit you did enjoyed your week, Ojou-chan." Stella smiled at her Master as Kakashi is currently in his room, taking a bath.
"Indeed. Anyway, any idea about Utakata-niisama?"
"Of course, I have."
"Eh?! Tell me! Tell me!"
The white haired homunculi smirked.
"Utakata-sama is currently taking his time travelling towards the Land of Fire. . .~"