Chapter 15

Prussia couldn't sleep. He tried to close his eyes, tried to force his mind to keep quiet. He sat up, running his hands through his hair. His mind raced. He sighed, standing, and walked to his window, looking out into the long, deep night. He felt sick. He glanced back at his arm, still bandaged, but almost healed. He was getting stronger. It had been several days, and he hadn't left his room or spoken to anyone. He hadn't slept or eaten. It wasn't Russia's doing. He didn't want to talk to anyone. He didn't want to eat. He couldn't face them, any of them, especially Latvia and Lithuania.

He sighed, watching the faint lights of the city flicker in the night. The stars shone above the mournful buildings, sparkling happily. Prussia turned away. He slumped into a chair at his table, tracing the knife mark with his fingers. The table had been stained red permanently. He hated it. He hated everything. He'd betrayed his people. He'd agreed to let them be killed in exchange for the back of someone who couldn't die. He closed his eyes. He would still fight. Quietly, carefully. He wouldn't let Russia hurt any of them again, but he would help his people. He would make it possible for them to get to West. He wasn't sure how, but he would find a way.

He turned, hearing a knock on the door. He looked at the clock on the wall. It was 5 am. He sighed, unsure if he wanted to answer. Another knock.

"G-G-Gil?"

"Latvia…" Prussia whispered, sighing. He stood, walking to the door. He had to face him. The boy could say whatever he wanted. He deserved it. He opened the door slowly, letting a stream of dim light through the dark room. Latvia stood behind the door, his blond hair messy. He wore a loose tee-shirt, blood-pricked bandages clearly visible on his shoulders, and sweat pants. Prussia forced himself to look at him, the boy's eyes turned to him, shining with tears.

Prussia nodded him inside and closed the door, encasing the room in only the dim starlight again.

"G-G-Gil… are you mad at me?" Latvia bit his lip, looking down, rubbing his hands together nervously.

"What?" Gil asked, stunned.

"I'm sorry I cried…. I'm sorry, I tried n-not to I really did, it just-"

"Shush." Gil knelt, looking into Latvia's face. "What are you talking about, I'm not mad at you."

"You haven't come to talk to me since… everything… and Liet won't talk to me, and Estonia won't talk to me, not that he ever talks to me, and Belarus is mad at Russia, and Ukraine is trying to get them to be friends again, and Hungary is scary and you're locked in here and you all hate me, and I'm really sorry…"

Prussia sighed, shaking his head. "No one hates you."

"I'm, I'm, I'm really, really s-s-sorry I cried." Latvia brushed his eyes with his wrist, biting his lip harder, trying not to cry.

"I'm not mad at you for crying. I'm not mad at you at all…" Prussia shook his head, trying not to look at the bandages on Latvia's shoulders. He sighed, touching Latvia's shoulders, gently. "Does it still hurt?"

Latvia nodded, "Not like Liet…"

"I haven't talked to him yet."

"You haven't talked to anyone, Gil." Latvia almost snapped.

Gil sighed, "I know. Does Liet hate me?"

Latvia bit his lip, "I don't know."

Prussia sighed, "He probably should. I should have given in to Russia sooner, I shouldn't have let him hurt you… I just…"

Latvia looked up at him, "He's not mad because you didn't give in sooner…"

"Why is he mad then?" Prussia wasn't sure if Latvia knew the answer, but he asked anyway.

"He's mad that you gave in at, at, at, at all, Gil! We're all mad you gave in! What are you d-doing! Russia's a monster, he's killing your people and you're just going to let him!?"

Gil took a step back, standing, shocked. He'd never seen Latvia angry before.

"You have no idea what he's done to me and my country! I may listen to him, but I hate him too! Why… why, why would you join him? Why would you agree to become c-c-com-c-communist? Why!?" Latvia slammed his weak fists against Prussia's chest.

Gil held Latvia's wrists. "Latvia… stop…" He looked away as the little country struggled against his grasp.

"Let go!" Latvia pulled his arms away, looking up at Gil, tears in his eyes.

Gil released Latvia's hands, looking down at the small country, who shook with anger.

"I hate it, Gil! I h-h-h-hate it!" Latvia brushed away tears again. "I hate it when he uses me! I know I'm small… I'm not as strong as you and Liet, but I hate it when he uses me!" He brought his wrist to his eyes again, trying to stop crying.

"Latvia…"

"You don't get it, Gil… you haven't been here long enough…" Latvia bit back the tears.

"What do you mean…?"

Latvia couldn't keep the tears back anymore. "Do you know how he broke Toris?"

Gil didn't answer. He didn't want Latvia to know about Lithuania's back.

Latvia looked up at him, sighing, "No, it wasn't giving him th-th-those scars. He thinks I don't know, but I, I, I, I do. I'm not stupid. I'm small, but I'm not stupid."

Gil sighed, looking down at the little blond, who's tears were streaming down his face.

"Gil…"

Prussia closed his eyes, sighing again.

Latvia looked up at him, "He used me."

"What?" Gil wasn't sure he understood.

"When he… when he broke Liet…" Latvia wiped away more tears, "He used me…"

It felt like someone had punched him. "He… what?"

"Just like he use-use-used Toris to get to you." Latvia looked away, "But Toris doesn't hate him. After everything, he doesn't hate him."

Gil shook his head, turning back to the table and chairs. He sat, putting his head in his hands, resting his elbows on the table. He heard Latvia slowly walk over and sit in the opposite chair.

"T-T-Toris says that Russia's bosses are cruel to him… that's why he's cruel to us…" Latvia looked down, "But I still hate him."

Prussia sighed, "You should be careful what you say, Latvia. The walls in this place have ears."

Latvia looked down, biting his lip. He looked up at Prussia after a long pause, "Gil?"

"Hm?" He kept his face in his hands, not looking up.

"N-n-n-now that y-y-y-you're on Russia's side…are-are-are you going to hurt us?"

Gil looked up at him. He'd never considered that side of joining Russia. "Nein," he shook his head, "Never, I couldn't-" He sighed, "I couldn't do that."

"What if he tries to make you?" Latvia trembled.

"I still wouldn't."

Latvia nodded, slowly. He stood, limping towards Prussia a little. He touched his bandaged arm. "Are you ok?"

Gil nodded, "You?"

Latvia smiled sadly, "Toris isn't the only one who's used to it…" He whispered.

Prussia closed his eyes, the words stung. He looked up into Latvia's big blue eyes again. "Do you need those changed?" He nodded to the bandages.

Latvia nodded, "Estonia can do it…" he was trembling again.

Prussia debated arguing with that, but he didn't want to see what was under the bandages. He wasn't sure he could live with it.

"I should go…" Latvia turned away from Prussia.

"Wait," Gil stood, turning to Latvia, putting his hands on the boy's arms gently, looking down into his face, "Are you sure you're all right?"

Latvia sighed, "None of us are 'all right', Gil. But I'm fine." He nodded, looking up into Prussia's face. He hugged him.

Prussia was surprised but hugged the little country back, very, very gently.

Latvia smiled up at him, walking out of the room without another word. He left the door open, light streaming into the dark room.

Gil sighed and went to close it. He stopped as a figure appeared in it, silhouetted by the light from the hall. Gil looked down.

"Hey, Priss."

Prussia sighed, then looked up at Lithuania, standing straight, pulling his arms behind his back. "All right, go ahead."

Lithuania shook his head, walking into the room and closing the door, "Go ahead with what, Gil?" he shook his head and went to sit on Prussia's bed.

Prussia looked at him over his shoulder and stepped closer. "You have every right to be angry with me after what I let you go-"

"I could have taken a hell of a lot more. You shouldn't have given up so easily." Lithuania shook his head, frustrated. He looked up at Prussia.

"I couldn't let him keep-"

"Since when did you get so-" He couldn't think of the right word.

"Oh, I don't know, maybe since I found out that I'm responsible for millions of deaths!? Maybe since seeing how absolutely terrified Poland is of me? Maybe since I effectively signed the death warrants for any of my people that try and get away from Russia? Maybe since-"

"Stop." Lithuania stood, looking into Prussia's face, "I get it. We all, get it. We've all done what we had to do to keep Russia happy, to keep him from hurting us more, but…" he shook his head, "I can't believe you actually…" he stopped, trying to calm down, "You need to talk to Poland."

"I thought you didn't want me to," Gil tried to sound angrier than he was.

"Yeah, that was before you decided to turn communist."

"Your country did."

Lithuania rolled his eyes, "Sure, my country did, but I didn't. You just did. I didn't go through the trouble of protecting Latvia just so you could give up so easily."

"I couldn't let him hurt you?"

"Do I look like I care!?"

"And how could you not? I heard you-"

"Yeah, it makes him go easier on you if you make noise. Not that I would expect your pride to be all right with that. I'm not stupid Gil, I knew what I was doing. I expected you to hold out longer!"

"I couldn't watch him do that to you! I couldn't! Not after Poland! I couldn't be responsible for that, I-"

"You weren't, I volunteered! And besides, I didn't do it for you."

"Latvia knows." Gil almost snapped.

"What, that I protected him? I know it annoys him, but-"

"He knows… about your scars."

"W…" Lithuania looked away, suddenly quiet, "…. How?" He whispered.

"He didn't say… just that he knows."

"So…" Lithuania sighed, "The one person who I actually cared about not knowing…"

"And I know Belarus knows. And I know you and Belarus-"

"Watch yourself, Gil." Lithuania looked up at him, standing, facing Prussia, "What do you know?"

"I saw you two upstairs." Gil shrugged, "I knew Belarus was creepy, but I didn't know she was 'dances with ghosts' creepy."

Gil jumped, taking a step back. He hadn't expected Lithuania to slap him.

"Sorry… but you deserved it."

Prussia nodded, "Yeah, probably." He shrugged, bringing his hand to his stinging cheek.

Lithuania sighed, sitting back on the bed. He looked out of the window as the sunrise started to dye the clouds bright orange. He glanced back at Prussia, who said nothing, only watched him, waiting for him to continue. He sighed again, "Belarus and I… we were married for a while. Our governments broke it off… very much like Austria and Hungary actually…" He looked down, "We don't … see each other much, not here. Not… now that we're both stuck with Russia. But sometimes… when it's late and everyone else is asleep… we go upstairs, and… we get to see each other…"

"And the ghosts?"

"There is so much you don't know, Gil, so much." Lithuania shook his head, "This house…" He looked around the room, "Every room in this house has a story… every back hallway, ever piece of wood and stone…" He sighed, closing his eyes, "Russia… Russia doesn't understand the difference between cruelty and teaching-"

"Yeah, I got that-"

"Because what he does to us... how do you think he learned? Do you think Peter 'the great' was kind to him?" Lithuania sighed.

"He made his country strong."

"Oh, yes, he certainly did that, by killing people." Lithuania half laughed, frustrated. "Peter was a monster. Worse than Russia. He tortured and killed his own son and guess who had to watch? Guess who got to deal with Peter's rage once he figured out that Ivan couldn't die?"

"So? We all have our dark sides, that doesn't forgive-"

"Forgive, no? But you've already forgiven him, haven't you? Or did you lie to Russia just to get him to stop hurting me? Because if you did, he'll make both of us regret it, and you won't be able to stop him this time. You really screwed this up, Gil. You're an idiot, sometimes."

"Like you're perfect!" Prussia crossed his arms indignantly.

"Perfect? No. But I have half a brain. I never… You'll find out. You joined Russia, you're a communist now, and everything that comes with it. He'll probably let your arm heal, then… then you'll join him. And if you think, that you're going to get out of helping him, you're wrong. He will make you."

"Yeah, no. I won't let him-"

"The first time he asks you to help him beat Poland, let me know, so I can stop you."

"W-w-I- what?"

"Oh, you thought he was just going leave you alone to do whatever you want?" Lithuania laughed darkly, "No. You're going to help him now. You're on his team. You're going to do whatever he asks you too. You belong to him, remember?"

"Watch it." Prussia snapped.

"Or what? You'll hit me?"

Prussia looked down, taking a step back. "Get out."

Lithuania sighed. "Gil…"

"I said, go."

"See?" Lithuania stood, turning to leave, "Just like Russia."

"I. Am nothing. Like. Russia." Gil turned to Lithuania, closing his hands into fists.

"I hope not. I really, really hope not."

A/N: Aaaaaand the plot thickens. Gil doesn't know as much as he thinks he does, and Lithuania is worried he's becoming like Russia... and Latvia actually got angry! (so did Liet, obviously). Gil's not doing so well at making friends at the moment. It's a good think Lithuania is pretty patient. But even Liet isn't too pleased with Prussia...

And... obviously, more Poland soon! (very soon... possibly next chapter soon!)