Disclaimer:I do not own any Batman Begins/Dark Knight characters. All other characters are mine.
Seems like a lot of people liked the fluff. (Could you tell I was listening to sappy music while writing it :) )
Thanks again for reading, favoriting or reviewing, anything you do to follow these two adorable psychopaths.
Stay amazing! XOXOXO- Improbable Dreamer
Cat hummed to herself, an off-tune rendition of 'Mr Brightside'.
Overhead the sun was glaring off the damp street, another rarity in Gotham; sunshine. Cat rolled her purple jacket to her elbows, enjoying the warmth on her skin, and strolled down the sidewalk in a bopping rhythm.
Around her, the city of Gotham was in complete chaos. Joker's message wasn't only a death-threat for the tattling Coleman Reese, but a 'call-to-arms' for heroic citizens to do what was right. Old rifles were pulled from cupboards, suicidal persons had jumped into their cars to intervene Reese on the road; ultimately Joker had managed to turn the entire population against the committed protectors of the community, even a few cops prioritised an entire hospital over one business man.
Cat's clacking heels paused beside a car, a cherry-red Audi A5, and she surveyed the sports car in interest.
"Pretty." She sighed in awe, and stroked a hand up the scarlet exterior to rest on the driver-side door.
From her navy backpack, she pulled out a wire coat-hanger and a pair of pliers. Cat twisted the hanger into a straight rod, leaving a defined hook at the very end. A wooden doorstopper also came out of her backpack, this she jammed between the upper part of the door and the car and tapped it in with the heel of her hand. Flecks of red paint helicoptered to the asphalt, and after a few moments Cat was able to pry the door a few millimetres away from the car.
She inserted the rod through the gap, guiding it down into the body of the car. Cat was pressed against the vehicle, and so had no visual guidance whatsoever to the small lock button. It took her a few tries, but eventually she pressed the button with the rod, and swung the door wide open. The smell of new car hit her and Cat clapped in triumph, sliding into the leather seat and gripping the wheel happily. She turned the radio on full volume, smiling when 'Sugar Sugar' by The Archies crackled through.
She had a simple task; cause some trouble, inspire some chaos. According to group behaviour, if one person riots against the police and targets Reese, more people should follow.
The Audi raced through the downtown, windows open and mediocre singing mingling with the sounds of bustling traffic.
"You are my candy girl, and you got me wanting you!" Cat sang heartily, turning the police radio at her hip on.
'-We got surveillance on the target, all units to 51st street travelling westbound'. She obeyed the orders with a grin, making a left at the intersection and straining her neck for the escorted policeman. Cat almost felt sorry for the GPD, they just had rotten luck when it came to armed escorts.
Three cars ahead of her, she recognised the black van with yellow lettering, that was a licensed police vehicle. As expected, it was escorted by 2 police cars blaring deafening sirens and warning all to keep their distance; Caterina took this as a personal challenge.
"Like the summer sunshine pour your sweetness over me!" Cat continued to sing, throwing her head back to enjoy the wind streaming through her long hair.
A red car surged past the police van, pulling a few feet ahead with a squeal of tyres. If there was a single policeman interested in road safety at that moment, Cat would've been pulled over for ticket. Luckily it wasn't until Cat yanked on the steering wheel, spun the car on its back wheels suddenly, and continued to accelerate backwards that she was even noticed.
She pulled out her Glock 17 handgun, sung the final verse, "You are my candy girl", and shot the grey 4X4 through the windshield so that it spiralled out of control in front of the GPD van. The van swerved suddenly, striking the curb with a flurry of sparks and sending the following cars into a state of panic. There was a violent stacking, a sandwich of smoking cars and twisted metal, the van continued its ascent and accelerated as hard as it could away from the wreck.
Cat wedged her boot's heel into the accelerator, undoing the laces so she could easily slip into the back seat while the car drove. With the handgun held against the rear window, she fired another two bullets that struck the van's rear-view mirrors and sent them tumbling under the van's hood.
"Suspect vehicle is being driven by a white female, operating vehicle erratically and visibly armed. Yellow team converge down Maryland avenue."
Cat threw the police radio out the window and twisted herself back into the front seat, waiting for the car to pass the ahead island of grass that would give her about a 3 second window of opportunity. Missing the mark would kill her instantly like a bug on a windshield.
She pulled the backpack to her front and hugged it close to her chest, counting down the seconds.
10
9
8
Cat twisted her body slightly so that her shoulder was at an angle optimal for jumping, she tucked her legs into her chest and brought her chin down.
7
6
She kicked open the driver-side door, her hair instantly rushing behind her in the sheer speed.
5
4
3-
-She sprung from the seat, diving towards the dirt with her eyes watering. Her landing was perfect as she hit the ground hard, shoulder-first, and continued to roll for several feet. Despite landing on the soft earth, her clothing was ripped to shreds. Half of her torso was exposed and bleeding with terrible road-rash, both of her kneecaps had skin removed, and a large gash painted her face from her forehead to her cheekbone.
Cat lay there on the side of the road as the van rushed past, tattered, bleeding, but alive and smiling. A few seconds later she heard a horrendous crash, her Audi was pancake flattened beneath the heavily armoured GPD van, and left a mountain of shattered glass and gleaming red metal.
A ringing sound jolted her heart again, and she almost died for the second time that day. Her cell phone was wrapped in a thick shell of duct tape, and turned on brightly when she pressed the button.
'Still alive? -J'
Cat laughed in ecstatic relief, her head landing on a clump of dirt as she gazed at the periwinkle sky. After a few gulps of air, she turned her attention to the phone again and took a selfie, pursing her lips and winking at the camera.
'A little…tyred'
She made herself laugh, and sent the photo and the wonderful joke across.
When she regained a steady heartbeat and the feel of her legs, Cat pulled an outfit from the backpack and began to change. The nurse outfit was slightly…less sexy than she thought it would be. A simple white gown with short sleeves and a tie around the waist, rather unflattering as it gave her body a square appearance.
'Waiting. -J'
"Yeah, yeah." She muttered, annoyed, and wriggled her feet into ugly nurse sneakers that were as comfortable as they were ugly. As a final touch, she pulled her unruly hair beneath a wig of a honey blonde ponytail, smoothing it over her head until it was horridly neat and dull.
Cat stood up, smoothing the wrinkles from her skirt. Considering she'd just jumped from a moving car, a little concealer across her facial cut was all that was needed to hide it.
"I am fucking incredible." She sang, sometimes a little self-congratulation was necessary.
Cat waved down a passing car, filling her eyes with fake tears.
"Oh, thank goodness." She gushed in a heavy Russian accent, sitting down beside the middle-aged woman who had pulled over. "These cars came from nowhere, I barely escape."
"Need a ride?"
"Gotham General, I need to help evacuations."
The lady had chestnut brown hair barely passing her chin, and wide green eyes lined with heavy makeup. "Sure thing, honey." She nodded, turning the car back onto the main road. "I think you're a hero, just a real hero."
Cat glanced away with a smile, feigning modesty.
"What's the, uh, chain for?"
Cat forgot she still had the chain belt around her waist, replacing the white sash that usually accompanied the outfit. "Oh," She looked down, "I forgot my…sash, luckily I had this thing lying around." The lady seemed satisfied, and completed the drive with mind-numbing small-talk.
Finally they pulled up into the hospital carpark, several policemen were guarding the entrance and Cat's driver strained her neck to view the armed men.
"Doesn't look like they need your help."
But Cat had already ducked out of the passenger door and waved 'goodbye' to her driver, surpassing a smile as she saw her backpack sitting in the shotgun seat.
No, it wasn't an explosive.
Cat felt an odd emotional response when the lady pulled over for her; grateful, indebted. The backpack had several hundred dollars' worth of jewellery in it, some light shopping while Cat perused the street for a car to steal. The jewellry shop was unattended and sparkling with possibility, the old man behind the counter didn't count as he was incredibly generous when she showed him her handgun.
Maybe she was going soft, all this emotional crap with Joker was bringing out her gooey side.
Cat didn't care, she wanted to be drowned in emotional crap if it was with him.
She fingered the silver pendent around her neck, the only part of the steal she'd kept for herself, and walked up to the burly policemen with confidence.
"Excuse me," Her accent was Australian now, and thoroughly convincing given that she'd travelled Australia for a few days with her parents. "I was asked to help with the evacuations."
"Sorry ma'am, no one in or out, Commissioner's orders. All the patients have already been evacuated."
"I see." She replied, thoughtfully, tucking a loose strand of honey blonde hair behind her ears. "But my doctor asked for me specifically, I need to get in there."
"I'm afraid I can't allow that."
"I'd like to see you stop me."
"Huh?"
The heel of her hand flew forwards, striking the first cop with a strong blow to the vagus nerve (located on the neck, just below the ear). He fell to the ground, his neck twitching and his arms in erratic spasms. It was a few seconds before he fell unconscious, the time it took his partner to process the current situation.
"Stand down." He commanded, brandishing a handgun at her chest with a shaky grip. Cat laughed, sprung forwards, and pulled his head into her chest by her right elbow. With her free arm, she reached around his head and slid her forearm under and across his throat. Cat locked her hands together, dropped the choking elbow slightly, and pulled up and into the cop's throat to cut off his air supply.
"When will you cops stop underestimating me?" She tutted as he flailed under her grip, his face changing from fire-truck red to a deep purple in moments.
Eventually his thrashing ceased, and Cat dropped him beside his unconscious partner. She mock saluted with her index and middle finger, before marching through the double doors and into the hospital's main lobby.
It was eerily quiet within, clipboards and medical supplies littered the floors like unwanted garbage and every single room was uninhabited. She spun on the spot, taking in the many interlocking corridors and stairways trailing to two more levels. Cat had never specified a meeting place with Joker, she'd simply assumed he would be waiting in the front lobby.
There was an overhead 'bing', as the speakers came to life, and a familiar voice echoed around the empty corridors.
"Could Nurse Morgan please make her way behind the front desk, Nurse Morgan to behind the front desk. Thank you."
Cat laughed and looked up at the corner speakers, testing his patience.
"Nurse Morgan who is not deaf, please come behind the desk. Thank you. Your ass looks great in that dress. Thank you."
She finally gave in, laughing, and walked up to the empty front desk. Scattered papers and a dishevelled cup of stationary was all that occupied the space, however, and she leaned forwards to glance behind the wooden desk.
Someone grabbed her from behind, lifting her into the air by her torso and spinning her on the spot.
"S-s-t-t-o-p." She hiccupped against the rushing air, to be finally put back on her feet and turn towards her attacker.
Cat laughed for the third time, tears springing from her eyes and her stomach clenching with the strain.
"Oh my…Fuck!" She wheezed with sore cheeks. "You said you were going to be a doctor."
Joker was wearing an exact copy of her nurse dress, complete with an 'obnoxiously red' shoulder-length wig and comfortable nurse shoes. He cocked his head, the gruesome smile of his face paint only adding to the hilarity of his ensemble.
"I thought you would be the doctor."
"M-me?"
Cat held up the passes they had secured a few days before. One from a Miss Abbot, a nurse with deep red hair and thick lips, and the other Doctor Bradley, a short balding man with a mole on his cheek.
"You thought I would be-" she paused to read the names, "Doctor Robert Bradley, while you assisted me as Nurse Dolly Abbot?"
He tucked a strand of red hair behind his ears, indignant.
"I could be a Dolly, you've definitely got the chin for a Robert."
She stamped on his foot, hard, and marched down the corridor with her nose in the air.
"Wait, Robert, I'm sorry," Joker ran up behind her. "You are the sexiest woman alive and you know it."
Cat swung her hips as she walked, glancing over her shoulder with a sultry smile and a nod.
The 'absolute circus' that was the two of them finally stopped outside a hospital room, the only room Cat had seen to be closed. On the door, there was a plastic pocket attached with Velcro, and a few information papers slipped inside. Cat read the first briefly, noting the written name and ailment info.
'Harvey Dent. Severe burns to left side of face'
Joker opened the door with a flourish, bowing his head. "After you."
"Thanks Dolly."
She pecked his cheek quickly, before entering the small hospital room to meet the last patient left in Gotham General.