THE soft sound of snoring filled the den. Beside her, Blueflower was fast asleep, tucked against her, with her nose buried into Sedgestrike's chest. For once, Blueflower's angelic presence failed to quell her fears. Her breaths escaped her rapidly as Pikestar's threat loomed over her like a dreadful shadow. To lose the ones she loved… or to lose the ones that dared to question the Order… the impending loss weighed heavy on her heart, but her spirit prompted her to rise. Getting to her paws, Sedgestrike knew that she could not ignore her destiny any longer. It was standing before her, monstrous, waiting to be realized.
I need some air, she thought. Leaving Blueflower, Sedgestrike carefully exited the den and set foot onto the moonbleached clearing within camp. To her surprise, waiting for her in the center of the clearing was Redleaf. The medicine cat's yellow eyes glowed with expectations, as if he was waiting for her to emerge all along.
Sedgestrike hesitated, expression souring. She was not keen on speaking with another member of the Order so soon after witnessing their malevolence. "What do you want?" she rumbled.
"To speak with you," Redleaf mewed candidly. "This may be the only chance I'll get." The stocky medicine cat slowly lumbered across the clearing, head low. He flicked his tail for Sedgestrike to follow.
Eyeing him quizzically, she was baited by his cryptic words. "I'm listening," she mewed warily, closing the distance between them, careful to keep her voice low as she followed him beyond the Fallen Cypress. They were going to Mother Lake.
Pushing through the thicket of marigold and reeds, they set foot on the shore that separated camp from Mother Lake. The sand was cool, untouched. Mother Lake was a beacon on par with the Great Cypress. When Marshstar first found the massive body of water many, many moons ago, he knew in his heart he found their home. Even now, as Sedgestrike gazed from the shore to the glittering surface of the lake, she felt at peace. It was a comforting feeling, like crawling into hernest after a long day of work, or getting groomed by someone she loved. Mother Lake instilled these feelings in all MarshClan cats. Sedgestrike sighed softly, allowing the calming aura to soothe her, until Redleaf's voice broke her meditation.
"Let me see your paws," Redleaf ordered. His accusatory stare was fixated on her paws.
"What?" Sedgestrike narrowed her eyes. Why was he acting like she did something wrong?
Redleaf didn't wait for permission, he lunged for her front paw, grappling it with his own to roughly turn the scarred palm up to the sky, for all the stars to see. Sedgestrike yanked her paw back with a hiss, only to pause when she saw disappointment clouding the medicine cat's broad face.
"What's wrong with you?" Sedgestrike snapped, bringing her paw back, shuffling them self-consciously. She felt violated. Exposed.
"I was hoping it was all a ruse or rumor… I was hoping you didn't actually take the mark." Redleaf bowed his head. His voice held a storm of emotion.
"I had no choice," Sedgestrike spat. "You should know. You're one of them." Why was he acting remorseful over this? Wasn't he a part of the Order too?
Redleaf cast her a baleful glare. "You don't realize the consequences of your actions, do you?"
Sedgestrike bristled. The last thing she wanted was to be scorned after being tortured by endless nightmares. "I haven't slept well since this happened. I'm surrounded by cats that pledge allegiance to a higher power that wants to rid of StarClan… and as it turns out, those same cats are probably all murderers," she rambled angrily. At this point, she was breaking. She didn't care if this was a twisted ploy to see if she truly was loyal to the Order. She was done.
Redleaf was silent, staring at the stars, musing.
"Is that what you wanted to hear?" Sedgestrike scoffed, spitting. "Congratulations, you got what you wanted. You can go let Whitestar know how I really feel."
"Sedgestrike… If I was really loyal to Whitestar's plans, I would've never made an attempt on your life back when you were in my charge, after the fall."
Sedgestrike took a step back, eyes wide. She felt her blood run cold as she remembered hacking up the mysterious white flowers. Boneset, Fernstream called them. "S-so you did try to kill me," she realized, breathless.
"Your mother nearly had my head for it." Redleaf shook his head. "But I couldn't bring myself to give you a high enough dosage to do it. I… I couldn't kill you. All my life, I've wanted to save cats. I never thought the day would come where I'd have to kill one."
"You don't have to kill me," Sedgestrike mewed, feeling vulnerable. She really could have died that day. In an instant, her life would have been gone. She never realized just how fragile she was until now. "Why… why would you even want to?"
"I've tried to explain to your mother since before you were born why—"
"The prophecy," Sedgestrike hissed.
Redleaf nodded. "The Place of Eternal Night came to me, whispering of a litter of kits that would come together to bring Their true power to fruition." His yellow eyes were distant as the stared across Mother Lake. Sedgestrike could tell he reliving the past. "When I discovered that it would be my own apprentice… I was heartbroken. Fernstream showed such promise. She could've restored MarshClan back into the paws of StarClan… but instead, she ignored her calling and left her position as my apprentice to be mated with Shaleheart." The bitterness in Redleaf's tone was scathing, acidic. His face even puckered as if he sucked on a sour rind. "And now here you are, and your siblings, and I'm forced to countdown the moons until our whole way of life gets flipped into the abyss…"
"So you tried to kill me to prevent the prophecy from happening, but you didn't have the guts," Sedgestrike scoffed, shaking her head. "Tch. You know what? You're worse than Whitestar. At least she follows through with what she wants. You scorn my mother for not taking responsibility of her destiny, yet you can't even shoulder it yourself!"
Redleaf winced but remained silent, chin lowering.
"You said you want to save cats, yet you join the Order of the Destined Paragons. You serve the Place of Eternal Night. You refuted your calling just as much as my mother did!" Sedgestrike was livid. She doubled her size as every hair on her pelt bristled. Some feral instinct in her begged for her claws to come unsheathed and lay into the hypocritical medicine cat, but she ignored the impulse was a soft hiss.
"You're right," Redleaf rasped, shutting his eyes. "I am just as much of a failure." He was quiet for a moment before raising his chin again and staring into Sedgestrike. "But I am trying to make up for it now."
Sedgestrike narrowed her eyes. "What do you mean?"
"You need to leave MarshClan, Sedgestrike. You and your siblings must go. If you stay, you'll surely bring ruin to us." Redleaf's voice was growing hoarse with desperation. "Whitestar is close to discovering the truth. The Place of Eternal Night is growing impatient with me—it will not be long before They unveil the prophecy to Whitestar, if They haven't already."
"You mean… run away?" Sedgestrike felt her innards liquify with the thought of leaving her home, her friends, her family… Blueflower. She feared if she opened her mouth to speak, she would throw up, so she sat in shock.
"It's the only option. You can't deliver MarshClan to the Eternal Night if you're not here to do so." Redleaf's voice rose an octave, not with hope, no… He almost sounded delirious. "Start a new life—a free one!"
"No!" Sedgestrike snapped, glaring at him. Once her initial shock dissipated, it was quickly replaced by outrage. "The Place of Eternal Night won't stop until They get what They want. Leaving MarshClan would only seal their fate." She curled her lip in disgust at Redleaf. "I might be the only one that knows what the Order has been doing that is willing to do something about it. I'm not going to take the easy way out. I'm not going to run from my destiny."
"So what?" Redleaf growled. "You wish to fulfill it?"
"I'm going to fight it!" Sedgestrike declared, rising to her paws. "If you weren't such a coward, I'd be dead right now." She narrowed her eyes at him. "I'm meant to be here, you see? Me and my siblings."
Redleaf flattened his ears, growling softly. "It's not like they'll help you anyways. You're alone, Sedgestrike."
She smiled softly, lowering her gaze. "That's fine. Unlike you, I'm not afraid. I can do this on my own."
Getting to his paws, Redleaf was breathing heavily, almost wheezing with disbelief. "Y-you're mad!" he sputtered. "Don't mistake your stubbornness for a strong will! Your pride will doom us all."
"We've been doomed, don't you see?" Sedgestrike murmured ruefully. "The Eternal Night has only grown stronger. Cats like you come into power and give Them what They want. Don't force your shame onto me. You are just as guilty."
As Sedgestrike moved to walk away, she heard Redleaf rustle to follow. Neither had more words to say. The damage was done, on both ends, and the cats established what they stood for. Redleaf wanted her gone, whether by death or departure. Sedgestrike, well, she was ready to fight. The battle had only just begun. She knew what she had to fight for, she knew her enemies. The only thing she did not know was where to start…
By the time the two cats arrived back in camp, the first light of daybreak was shining. The indigo sky was stained with pink and pale blue, running like rivulets through thin, silver clouds to chase away the stars. Humidity cloistered the marsh, bringing out dewdrops and prompting cicadas to sing their song gleefully, knowing a hot day was on the horizon. Sedgestrike revelled in the first glimpse of morning. A new day, and with it would come the Blossom Festival.
Ignoring Redleaf's baleful glare as he retreated to the medicine den, Sedgestrike smiled. She refused to be quashed by Pikestar's threat or Redleaf's lament. This was her life, she was going to take charge of it. She would change MarshClan for the better, and hopefully… she would have Blueflower by her side.