I'm sitting in the living room. A bottle of scotch half full in front of me as I hold the glass in my hand.

"Oh, Clark" I hear her moan from our bedroom "Don't stop!"

I keep silently crying as I gulp down my drink. Do I really need to be here for this? It's not like I'm watching them, but at least I had the decency to not do it in our own home.

"Oh, yes, YES" Bridgette cries, I can hear his grunts too.

God, I don't want to but I really do deserve this pain in my chest.

With a shaky hand, I try to call Adrien as I know I need to keep myself distracted. I know I deserve to listen and to cry until I die but God, I really can't. I can't. Not her...

"Hello?" My cousin's voice can be heard on the phone.

"Hey, buddy" I greet in a quiet tone, I shut my eyes trying to make the noise stop. I really want to leave. But every time I ignore it, I just grow more aware of it.

"What's up, Felix? What's the matter? Are you alright?" That's my little cousin...always so worried for others.

"No...not really?" I admit, letting out a somber chuckle.

"Tell me, what's going on?"

"I- erm, Brid is fucking another guy right now." I sigh, heavily. "Like, literally in our bedroom."

"What?! How- Why would you even tell me that? God, the image. I can't-"

"Adrien, I need to talk, please, I can't leave and I feel this heavyweight in my chest that's becoming heavier and heavier by the minute. And I know I deserve it but it's too much, Adrien, it's way too much. God, did I do this to her?" I say, starting to ramble.

"Alright, well, how did this happen?"

"Remember Lilian?"

"That girl who is always throwing yourself at you that you've been cheating Bridgette with for the past 2 years?" He asks, in a neutral tone.

"How did you know?"

"I'd love to say that I'm an observant guy, but truth is, I saw the text messages on your phone a little after you and Bridgette's first anniversary as a married couple."

"Jesus...wait, does that mean Marinette knows as well?"

"No, I didn't tell her. She would've killed you in that instant and I don't think Bridgette would've like that" He pauses "But I did tell Bridgette about it. She's like a sister to me and- and I couldn't bear for you to break her heart once again."

"How-how did she react?"

"Do you want me to tell you the truth or a version of the truth that will let you sleep at night?"

"God! Bridgette! That's it, God, I'm so close. You're so fucking tight, baby" Clark cries from the bedroom which makes me shiver.

"Felix?" Adrien calls, bringing me back to the conversation.

"The truth, please," I beg.

"She...well...she was shocked. Like, she couldn't move at all and I could see the light leave her eyes. Do you know that mischievous spark that she always has? Yeah, well, it was fading. But like, she suddenly came back, you know? It was the oddest thing, she blinked twice and smiled at me as if nothing was happening. She said: Thank you for telling me, please don't tell Mari, I'll handle it."

"No..."

"I'm not done, you wanted to hear the full thing, now listen." He takes a deep breath and continues, "I asked her if she was sure, and I offered to confront you, her smile grew wider and her eyes became watery, she said: I've had my suspicions for a couple of weeks, I just need for him to notice me again." His voice becomes shaky. "she said: I'm sure it is all a misunderstanding."

"Adrien..."

"She was broken, Felix! But she came back to the party as if nothing had happened. She laughed at your jokes, she smiled at you and never left your side for the rest of the night. She has been a model wife and you thank her by fucking the first girl that throws herself at you?"

"I'm sorry."

"You better be sorry, because you know what?" I've never heard him so mad before. "Because you deserve to be listening to that. Imagine what it was like for her, every single fucking night! You deserve to cry over her, you deserve to think that you lost her. And I say think because I know that realistically, she will never leave you. She loves you too much for that."

"I know I screwed up, Adrien" I start talking, once I know that he's done yelling at me. "I really do, and I came to an agreement with her. I have a year to win her back."

"Oh yeah? Well, how's that going for ya?"

"Well, she's fucking her employee right now so, not very well."

"Listen..." He sighs "I'm sorry, okay? I shouldn't have lost my cool, but I've waited 2 years to tell you these things...you know?"

"It's okay I-" I get cut off mid-sentence by the sudden appearance of Clark into the room. "Eh, sorry, can I help you?"

"Yeah, I was wondering if I could get a glass of water, a man's gotta recharge, am I right?"

"Get it yourself."

"No, I'd love for you to get it for me." I stand up.

"Listen, Adrien, I'll be back in a second, I need to give this idiot a glass of water."

"Oh...okay?" I hear him say as I lower the phone. I walk over to the kitchen cabinets and I take the glass, fill it with water and hand it over to the shirtless bastard that's staring at me with a smug smile.

"Thanks, I appreciate it."

"Whatever," I mumble.

"I told you, dude, you should let her go."

"Well, I won't, dude."

"Hey, I was just trying to piss you off right about now, but I mean it. Your marriage is too damaged, just let her go and if she truly loves you she can come back or something. It seems like both of you need a break."

"Thanks, but I don't tend to listen to men that fuck married women for marriage advice, you know?"

"Your loss, dude. She deserves to have some fun, and you've fucked up too much to live your life as if nothing has happened." He takes a long sip, emptying the cup. "Thanks" he winks at me and I scoff.

I see him walk away back to the bedroom, my bedroom. And what's worse, Bridgette's giggles and laughter can be heard from inside the room.

God, if I really want her back, I need to step up my game. I walk quickly over to where I left the phone.

"Hey, are you okay?"

"No, not at all. I need to win her back. I am not going to live like this. I know it's selfish, but she's the love of my life."

"Felix..."

"I know, I know it's stupid for me to win her back when I've clearly lost her, alright? But I don't know what else to do! I love her! I love her so much and I know I don't deserve her, I know I do. But I am nothing without her, I am who I am because of her..."

"Okay, then stop moaning about it and grow a pair of balls."

"You're right. Thanks, Adrien."

"No problem, what are you going to-" I end the call and walk over to the bedroom. I don't bother in knocking as I come in, really mad.

"Listen, I understand if you want to leave but you said I have one year and I want to win you back so Clark, leave my house right now! Brid, I'm taking you to the park, we're going to go to your favorite spot and-" I can't continue my pathetic rant as I look at them. They're fully clothed. Bridgette's hairdo remains intact and her makeup is flawless. She does not look like a woman that has been passionately fucked for the last two hours. "I- eh- what?"

"I was low-key wondering how long it would take you to just interrupt us" Clark admits, laughing.

"Yeah, maybe we're just really good actors," Bridgette says, she's laying down on our bed which, by the way, is still made!

"I don't understand," I admit.

"Truth is, I did want to cheat on you, but more than actually cheating on you, I wanted for you to feel what I felt."

"Powerless," I comment, understanding.

"Exactly, kitty." she smiles at me, finally standing up. "Thanks, Clark, for your help."

"My pleasure, baby. Anytime you need to fake sex or...have real sex. I'm here for you." She laughs and kisses his cheek.

"I'll keep it in mind, thank you." I'm still in shock as I see him leave the room and possibly the apartment. "I'm sorry I hurt you, alright?" She brushed a strand of hair behind her ear, not looking at me. "I know I went too far but I didn't want to sleep with anyone else and-"

I can't listen more of her unnecessary apology so I kiss her hard to keep her from talking.

"You're not mad?" She asks me, brushing our noses together.

"Marry me, Bridgette." She giggles.

"We're already married silly"

"No, I mean it. Sign the papers right now and let me make things right."

"What do you mean?"

"Bridgette, I love you so much it hurts, I've loved you for more than a decade. But I didn't honor my vows or my promises. Let me make it up to you."

"Felix..."

"Marry me, Bridgette," I demand, in a quiet, pleading voice. "Please, let me truly call you mine." She moves her head side to side, indicating her negative response.

"I will sign the papers, but I won't marry you, Felix."

"But-"

"I can't. I- quite frankly, I don't want to."

"But I thought-"

"I know how it's going to play out, alright? You're going to love me good for like, what? A year, maybe two after we get remarried. And then you'll leave me for another woman, again."

"No, that won't happen, I swear. I love you too much to make you go through that again. Believe me, after tonight, I know what it felt like for you. God, I wanted to kill him and then myself! I swear I won't-"

"But you will, I know you will. Because it is in your nature to not love me completely."

"What do you mean?" She walks over to the bed and sits down, letting out a sigh.

"You loved Ladybug, and you only loved me when you found out I was her."

"Brid, we've been through this, that is not true, I already held feelings for you but I was too blind to see them. I was stubborn!"

"I don't believe you, though! It took you forever to figure out Ladybug and I were the same person. Do you know how long it took me? Only a couple of seconds."

"Bullshit."

"It's true. We were sort of talking about our civilian lives and you said my name by mistake. I remember it vividly, you said: I had a busy morning, to be honest, and this girl didn't make things easier. She has her moments, but I do hate her. From the moment you said that phrase, I knew it was you. Because it hurt so much to hear you say you hated me. It was the first time you really broke me. I knew at that moment you would never love me so imagine my surprise when you years later asked me to marry you!"

"I-I'm sorry I said that alright? But I was talking to my crush and-"

"Exactly! Ladybug is the woman you thought you'd marry, but you didn't. That's why the passion was not there, at least for you because I still want you as much as our wedding night."

"Bridgette..."

"No, I'm sick of this. Please go sleep on the couch, we'll talk about the divorce tomorrow and-"

"No." I declare.

"Listen, Felix, I am signing those papers and-"

"I said no, Bridgette!" I've started to cry and quite frankly, I feel like a child having a tantrum but I know that the moment one of us leaves the bedroom and if I give in to her wishes, I'll lose her forever. "I won't lose you!"

"Stop being so selfish!"

"But I love you!"

"I know you do and I'll always love you but you fucked up!" I fall onto my knees. Powerless, she wanted me to feel like this, well, she was successful.

"You said I had a year..."

"Yeah, well, I changed my mind-" she looks at me, and I don't know how I must look like for her to kneel down in front of me and hug me. "I'm sorry, okay? But you broke us, and I can't live this lie anymore. I can't pretend everything is alright."

"You said you'd never leave me" I cry, hugging her back, desperate.

"I know I did, I know."

"Please stay, I love you."

"I'm sorry" She stands up, I cry harder. She leaves the room.

I fall asleep on the floor, and I know I will never get her this close to me again.

I'm suddenly standing, I blink in order to focus my vision, condom still in hand, I'm about to throw it into the hotel bin. Where am I? I look to the side and Lilian is in the bed, naked.

"Are you sure you can't stay for a little longer?" She asks, her once sweet voice now feeling poisonous to my ears.

What the fuck is going on?

Hey! Yeah, I know, super quick lol but I had inspiration and I thought, why not?

So, I have some ideas on how the next chapters will work but I'll see! Thank you again for your support and don't forget to review! 

I love you all, 

Lia