CHAPTER 8
Enjoy!
The words in italics indicate past events.
Disclaimer: As you have guessed, I don't own House.
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Cuddy's eyes widened at the familiar voice. She looked up in shock, mouth open.
"Close your mouth Cuddy, you're not catching flies." House said. But that was the best thing he could think of to say. What was Cuddy doing here and had he just been busted? He didn't have an answer to the former but the latter was definitely true.
"Dad, what's going on?" Danny being quite shy, hid behind House's leg. He clingged onto his leg like it was a life line.
"Hey kiddo, it's alright. She's not going to bite. Dr Cuddy is a friend of mine."
Cuddy had never heard him speak so gently to anyone in her life. The words sounded so loving and caring. This couldn't be House.
"Dr Cuddy, do you mind if we go outside? Dan's not too good with crowded areas?"
"S-sure House, theres a bench outback"
They walked out the double patio doors towards a picnic bench positioned by a still lake. She still hadn't quite got over that House was acting so kindly.
They sat down and Danny crawled onto his lap. It was approaching 9:00 which was his bed time so he was tiring.
"Before you fall asleep on me, let me take your tie off. Are you cold?" House asked as he loosened Dans tie.
"Mmm a little" House grabbed his rucksack and pulled out a jumper and slipped it over Danny's head. He was trying to stall time, hoping Wilson would find them and then they could run off. Pretend this never happened.
"House, what's going on?" Cuddy finally popped up. She had finally managed to string a sentence together. However, she was still in shock and slightly confused.
"Dr Cuddy, this is my son" He pointed down towards the little boy resting on his lap. "Daniel James House. Danny this is my boss and friend, Dr Lisa Cuddy."
Danny looked at Cuddy and smiled.
"Hi Daniel, it's nice to meet you." Cuddy said.
"Do you save people like Daddy?" House had to swallow back a sarcastic comment.
"Yeah she's my boss, she has to run the whole hospital." 'And me' House added to himself.
At this point, Wilson finally turned up but stopped at the sight of Cuddy. Like a B rated comedy, he stared from one to the other.
"Unc! This is Dr Cudd-Cudd ..."
That brought Wilson back to the land of the living.
"Cuddy"
"Yeah! Daddy says that she's a Doc like you are." Danny jumped in. He had no clue why everyone around him looked glum and slightly scared. He didn't understand what was wrong.
"Wilson knows?" Cuddy was starting to get angry now. Was she the only one that didn't know? Did his team know? Maybe they thought it was just some funny joke.
House looked to Wilson for help. He was trapped by Cuddy and needed help getting out.
"Cuddy look, it's a long story okay? I'm Houses a best friend. Of course I knew. But no one else knows at the hospital."
"And I would like it to stay that way" House added in a near whisper.
"So nobody else knows about Daniel?" She questioned, her anger was starting to die down again.
"No, it's just Wilson and now you. Look, this is going to take a while to explain and I need to get this little one" House looked down into his lap to see that Dan had fallen asleep against his chest. "to bed. It's been a long day for him and I'm sure you need to get home to Rachel"
Cuddy nodded in agreement. She'd completely forgotten about Rachel with this bombshell.
"Okay, But House?" He looked up at Cuddy. "I don't want to leave this. I might as well know now."
He looked down into his lap staring at his sleeping son. He looked so peaceful and innocent when he slept. He acknowledged Cuddy with a nod.
Wilson finally decided to pop up in to the conversation.
"Look, we usually take Danny out for the day on Saturday as it's both our days off. Why don't you bring Rachel to the park next to the hospital tomorrow morning? I can keep an eye on them both." He suggested to them both. He knew House would kill him later but it was the best he could do to try and sort this out.
House acknowledged that it was a plan at least. The park was on mutual ground and he wouldn't have to do this by himself. He would have Wilson.
"Sounds like a plan, only if it's okay with House?" She didn't want to force anything onto him but she needed to know.
"Yeah, it's a good idea. We'll see you there." There was a slight anxiety held in his voice. He really didn't want to have to go through everything again.
They stood to leave, House transferring Danny to his left hip.
"Do you want me to take him House?" Wilson offered but got shot down.
"Stop mother henning Wilson! I've got him." It was meant to hold anger within the words but Cuddy detected non.
"We'll see you tomorrow Cuddy" They both said in unison and headed off in different directions.
She didn't understand. First of all, how had House managed to keep this a secret for so long. His son looked about 7. That was a hell of a long time he was hiding away his private life. She'd never been to his home but they went out for drinks and dinner sometimes. What would he do with Daniel then? Furthermore, she couldn't grasp how soft and loving House had been. When talking to Daniel, there was nothing but kindness in his voice. She thought it was impossible for House to ever hold that for anybody. Even to his patients he was arrogant. But she did have to admit, he had a way with children that she couldn't understand. For example, the autistic child. He just knew how to get him to trust him. But the one big mystery to her was about Daniel's mum. Where was she?
House and Wilson arrived at the apartment. They needed to talk but first they needed to get Dan to bed. He was completely shattered and remained sleeping throughout the car journey. House went to put him to bed and kissed his son goodnight. He then hobbled back to the living room.
"So, what do we do?" Wilson questioned whilst grabbing two beers out of the fridge.
"Run away to the Caribbean? It's suppose to be a good hiding spot." House was trying to break the seriousness of the situation but it was a feeble attempt.
"She's going to want to know where Danny came from" Wilson completely ignored House's comment, although it did sound tempting.
"I know." They sat in silence for a while. Just staring at the opposite wall. Jen had decorated the apartment with paintings and photographs. House kept his eyes on the nice cottage painting. They had agreed that when they retired, they would move to the middle of nowhere, surrounded by fields. Somewhere where nobody would be able to judge or put pressure on them. It sounded like heaven to House. But now that wasn't going to happen.
"Are you going to tell her about ... you know ... what happened" Wilson carefully broached. It seemed to make House snap.
"I don't want any of this Wilson! I don't know okay? I don't know" House took a swig of his beer. He knew she would interrogate him but he didn't want any of this. And Wilson knew that.
"I think you're going to have to House." He looked at House. "I'm sorry." He wanted to protect him from the pain bringing it back up will cause. It was not going to be an easy few days.
"Let's watch some tv." House grabbed the remote and switched on the tele to some all night monster truck rally. He resigned to the fact that he was going to have to tell Cuddy what happened.
By 12:00 they had both fallen asleep, slumped on the sofa. Both still in their rumpled suits.
—
House was the first to awake. His leg was close to cramping. His pills weren't in arms distance and he knew he couldn't stand yet without going timber.
He tried to massage the cramp out. Sleeping on the sofa was never a good option. Especially now that he didn't take Vicodin. He let out a groan as the muscle continued to cramp.
Wilson had been awoken by all the movement and the light groans coming from his right side.
"How bad House?" Wilson was instantly worried by the grunting next to him.
"Pills" He managed to gasp out as it started to turn into a full blown spasm.
Wilson dashed to the kitchen then to House's jacket pocket where he saw the little bottle. He next ran to his bedroom where House kept the heating pad.
He hurried back and handed him the tablets and put the heating pad on his leg.
House swallowed the tablets and sighed at the feel of the heating pad, still trying to massage the muscle.
The spasms started to die down after ten minutes into a ache. The pain lines on his face started to unfold as he sat up.
"I'm going to head back to my place to get changed, will you be okay?" Wilson asked, seeing Houses pain die down.
"Stop fussing and go home. You smell." House snarked.
"Well you're definitely okay then. I'll see you at 10."
With that, he left. House stood up and tested his leg. It seemed to be able to hold his weight. He found his cane and hobbled to the bathroom followed by the bedroom. Maybe he could get another hours kip. It was only 7 and Dan wouldn't wake till 8 on a Saturday.
He managed to fall into a restless nap until somebody decided to jump on him.
"Nnnnnn go watch tv for a bit." House mumbled.
"But I'm hungry Daddy." Why was he so cheerful in the morning? He definitely got that trait off his mother.
"There's some breakfast bars In the cupboard. Daddy needs sleep." It was Saturday therefore he didn't mind letting Dan entertain himself for a while.
"I want bacon though." He was trying his luck he knew but it was always worth a try.
"Dannnnn." House warned. Just another 30 minutes. That's all he wanted. Dan jumped off the bed in a grump and headed off. House was already asleep when he closed the door.
He awoke next time to bacon. 'Shit, it's 9:30.' He grabbed his cane and limped to the kitchen to see Wilson and Danny eating bacon sandwiches.
"Here comes sleepy bum. Coffee?" Wilson poured some and slid it over.
"You know, I think you would make an absolutely fabulous house wife one day. I can really see potential."
"No more Mrs Wilson's for me. Sorry to disappoint you dad." Wilson snarked back at him. Danny loved his uncles and dads conversations. He found them funny and was trying to hold back a laugh.
"Anyway, Dan we need to talk about something, okay?" Dan knew his dads voice tones and facial expressions off by heart. He knew he was being serious. He hadn't done anything wrong he thought, so it must be something else.
"Do you remember Dr Cuddy from last night?"
"The doctor! Like you and James!" Danny jumped in.
"Yeah, well today we are going to go to the park to meet up. You're going to have to be good for me and leave me to it if I say so."
Dan nodded.
"She has a daughter that you can play with though." Wilson piped in.
"Cool, but girls smell." That broke the tension and they all started laughing again.
"Yeah kid, keep thinking that for the next 20 years and we will be good." House laughed.
—
They made it to the park for 11. Cuddy was already there, watching Rachel totter around. She had had plenty of time to think of questions. Laying in bed last night, she couldn't sleep. Thoughts of House and his son swimming around.
She saw them coming towards her and shifted on the bench to make room.
"Hello Dr Cuddy." Daniel chirped up. Now he knew that Cuddy was a friend of his dads and uncles, he was less shy.
"Hello Daniel, it's nice to see you." Rachel came over to see what was going on.
"Danny, this is Rachel. Dr Cuddy's daughter." House introduced. Dan looked all shy again at the lively toddler and hid behind Wilson.
"Hey, why don't we go play on the swings. I'll push you both." Wilson took them off and gave a reassuring nod to House.
Once alone, House looked back to Cuddy.
"I guess you want to know somethings. I think it will be easier to talk if you ask me questions." He really didn't want to go through this, but he told himself that this had to one day be done.
Cuddys mind went blank for a few seconds. She blurted our the only thing she could think of.
"Does your team know?" House turned towards Cuddy, a little amused by the question.
"Is that the best you could think of? And no, we answered that one last night." Damn of course he did. But at least it had given her time to think.
"Who's Daniel's mother?"
'Fuck, no not this one, Cuddy please' He mentally begged.
With a sigh he started. "Daniel's mum is called Jenifer Greyson- House. She's my wife."
"You have a ... a wife!" She blurted out. House lifted up his hand to reveal a thick, silver wedding band. It glistened in the warm sun.
"I take it off when I go to work so no one notices. I keep it in its original box so when I leave I put it back on." He told her.
Cuddy was positive they had had a conversation about marriage and House was furiously against it. What over lies had he been telling?
"When did you meet her?" Cuddy followed up.
"First of all, her name is Jenifer. Not the cats mother. Secondly, it was Wilson's fault."
12 years earlier ...
"House, you're wallowing in you're own self pity. You need to get out of this filthy apartment and do something before you rot in here."
Wilson had come over to try and cheer House up. He had been shut in his apartment for 4 days now since loosing his latest patient. Normally, House wallowed around for a day or two but he had become attached to his last patient. It had been a chronic pain patient. He had shared empathy and sarcasm with the man. The place stank. The curtains were drawn and there was an assembly of beer bottles and dirty plates on the counter.
"What if I like wallowing?" Even House thought it was a feeble attempt at a comeback.
"Look, I did some googling and found a concert that's on tonight. A blues band. Thought it would be right up you're street. It starts in an hour so get dressed." Wilson demanded.
"I'm a grown man Wilson, what if I don't want to go? What will you do then? Call my mum?"
"House, it's blues. I know you've been waiting for a concert to come to Princeton for ages. Now go and get your sorry ass into some trousers."
"Yes mum" House replied before sulking into his bedroom. He would of put up a bigger fight but it was blues after all.
They arrived at the concert hall. It was called a concert hall but more looked like a barn house, done out with a stage and some seating. They grabbed some drinks before plonking themselves near the back.
When the band came on, there was a loud cheer. But House didn't notice. His eyes went straight to the girl on the piano. Her hair was tossled and wavey. It was loosely thrown up into a pony tail to keep it out of the way. But it was the way that the brown locks shined in the dim lighting towards House that kept him focused on her. She wasn't petite but curvey, wearing a tight white T-shirt and a pair of denim jeans that complemented her figure.
At the end of the night, the young woman came up to the microphone.
"Hi folks, I hope you're enjoying tonight." There was a big cheer from the crowd. "But we are looking for a volunteer, someone who can play an instrument. Crowd interaction and all that." Her voice was playful and carried to the back of the room where House stood with Wilson at the bar. Something inside of House melted at the sound of her voice. It was a slightly southern accent but carried no harshness to it.
Of course Wilson had noticed House staring at the pretty woman and had the guts (only after quite a few beers) to shoot his hand straight in the air.
"Oh ho, I think we have a very eager volunteer."
"I volunteer my friend!" House'd head swivled to look at Wilson in shock and anger.
"Oh go on House, I know you like her" he winked.
"Well, come on up." House hobbled up to the stage, shooting daggers at Wilson whilst he did. Maybe he could try and get her into his bedroom at the end of the night at least.
"What do you play, sir?" She asked.
"Everything really" House replied, a little arrogantly.
"Well, someone's a little self centred. So Mr Brains, what's you're favourite?" She asked. She couldn't help noticing his deep blue eyes. They were like electricity that coursed through her veins.
"Piano"
"Well you will be playing with me, I'm Jen, and you are?"
"Erm House ... No. Greg."
They took the seat on the bench. She leaned over and whispered "you can play, right?"
He chuckled and responded "you'll see"
It was music that flowed out of them, the melodies they shared that night. The way that they each knew what the other was doing, where there fingers perfectly landed to create such passionate music. It was that, and the look in each other's eyes, that brought them together.
At the end of the evening, she placed her hand on his lap and leaned into whisper. "Yes, I think you can play."
"So, you met at a concert nearly 12 years ago from now?" Cuddy responded at the end.
"Yeah, that's kinda how we hit it off. I'd never believed in love at first sight until then. I just felt a connection, a bond that we shared. I loved Stacy, but I knew we would never work and I knew that the love we shared was conditional." 'Why am I telling her all this?' House questioned himself. He all of a sudden felt open. His walls came flying down. That was the affect Jen had on him.
"So, when did you marry then?"
"3 years later to that day. We had a small ceremony with her parents and her best friend, my mum and Wilson." House answered. He smiled, thinking about Jen in her wedding dress. He had nearly cried tears of joy when he saw how stunning she looked.
Cuddy noticed this. He saw a spark in his eyes. It was at that point she knew that this woman was the love of his life.
"So, when was Dan born?"
"2 years after the wedding, Wilson nearly fainted at the sight." He let out a chuckle again. It was very funny at the time.
"So, where's Jen now?" Cuddy questioned. She found it mysterious that their was no sign of her now.
House took a deep breath, trying to steady his emotions. He looked over to see that Daniel was far enough away to not over hear.
"She's" House rubbed his forehead. "she's in Mountain Lake Convalescence Home. Has been for the last 4 years nearly." He stared down at his shoes.
Cuddy was lost for words. She wasn't expecting that. His wife was cooped up in a nursing home. How though? Should she push him or not? But the urge to know be became desperation.
"God" she paused to take a breath. "How? I mean ... why?"
House started to take deeper breaths. He had never had to explain it and the memory never got easier. Despite what people said.
"Jen was in a accident, she was badly hurt."
Cuddy didn't want to interrupt him but he seemed on the verge of tears.
"Do you remember when that train derailed just outside New York?" House asked her.
"Yeah, it was awful. Hundreds dead and several left severely injured. It was so tragic." Cuddy was yet to catch on where House was going with this.
"She was going to a concert to perform solo. She had just had her big break"
"Greg! I got the news, an agent has signed me on and says I could be performing to thousands!"
"It was her 5th performance playing solo and she had become well know in the classical industry. It was her first gig in New York. She was so excited."
Jen gave Greg a long embrace and then picked up the small toddler running around the apartment.
"Mammy" Dan said and pressed his little chubby finger against his mums nose.
"Hey my little monster, you look after daddy okay?" The toddler nodded his head furiously."Make sure daddy looks after you as well." She gave Greg a mock stern look." I love you sweetheart." She put the restless toddler down and went back to Greg.
"I'll see you guys tomorrow. I love you."
"I love you too, stay safe." Greg replied.
She turned to leave but then added. "No late all nighters with Wilson. The apartment stank of pizza last time!"
"Yes dear." House shouted back.
With that she left the apartment.
"She was on that train. A piece of debris collided with her head." He couldn't look at Cuddy, it was too painful. His heart wanted to shatter into little fragments. Become irreparable.
"Jen, ... she s-suffered substantial brain damage"
"I'm so sorry Dr House, she will never be able to function without a series of specially trained support staff. Her brain was severely damaged, leaving Jenifer completely dependant on people to feed, dress and move her. She will require nursing home care. I truly am sorry."
House nodded to the doctor. As soon as he had left he burst into uncontrollable sobs and gasps, head buried on the side of the hospital bed. Hand intertwined with Jens.
"God, House. I'm so so sorry. I never expected ... thought." She was scrambling for words but couldn't find the ones that could even would start to console House. When House looked up, she saw a different type of pain in his eyes. She saw pure emotional pain and heartbreak. I single tear spilled over onto his cheek.
"I ... I can't do this Cuddy. I need to clear my head." House grabbed his cane and headed off abruptly in the opposite direction.
"Hey Daniel, will you look after Rachel for a bit? I need to go see if everything's alright." Wilson noticed House hobble away, trying to fight the tears and Cuddys gobsmacked expression.
"Okay. Is daddy upset?" Daniel asked with sweet child innocence.
"He will be alright. Your dad had to do something very hard today. He just needs sometime alone."
Wilson left Daniel and Rachel on the roundabout and went to sit with Cuddy. She had her head bowed in her hands. It looked like she was trying to prevent it falling off.
"Wilson, he was in so much pain." She sobbed. She was the one now struggling to overcome the sudden tide of emotions. "When Tr-trying to tell me what happened, he nearly broke down." Cuddy stuttered.
Wilson took Cuddys hand in his and squeezed it. "I think that's what he's gone to do now." He said with sadness. He looked around, trying to spot House but couldn't.
"House thinks the world about Jen. She accepted House for who he truly was. It was the first time no one had tried to change him and really loved him for just being him." Wilson offered.
"Why didn't he tell me? I would of tried to help. I could of done something for them. Used my power to get the best care."
"It was nothing malicious Cuddy. There was truly nothing that you could of done. He had 3 neurologists review her case and it all cane back the same. She was on the verge of becoming a vegetable. Everything that could of been done to had been. The only option for him was to make her feel as comfortable and loved as possible."
How could she of been so naive? It hurt her even thinking about the amount of pain House must of been in and probably continues to live with. Every time he goes to his sons parents evening, or to the park. Even waking up every morning to see the space on the bed next to him empty. To realise he was alone now.
Wilson continued on with his answer to Cuddy.
"House just wanted to keep his personal life separate from the hospital. He's not the same man at the hospital when's he at home. He didn't want Jenny and Dan getting dragged through shit because of what he had done. He didn't want them being treated like crap because of him. He strongly believes that none of them, especially his son, deserve to take on others hate towards him. He just thought everybody would go 'that's Houses son. He must be a right little shit.' "
For the first time since last night, Cuddy was starting to understand. He had a life outside of work which she had been too ignorant to acknowledge. She'd only seen House cry once and that was during the infarction. But she now understood that deep down, there was this caring, emotional man that only a select few were gifted to see.
After his great escape, House had slumped by a tree next to the lake. It was almost peaceful here. It felt comforting and private. His tears freely fell, matching the rippling water. He felt safe to cry there. No one was looking.
After a while the tears started to disappear. It was time to go back and face Cuddy again. He picked up his cane and hobbled back to the park.
"Daddy! Will you come play on the swings with us?" Danny shouted over to him. He hobbled over to his son and embraced him in the most loving way he knew. A big old bear hug.
"See what I mean?" Wilson whispered. Both of them watching on at the intimate moment.
House walked over with a Danny and Rachel in tow.
" I think these two have had a good time" House said looking at the two smiling children.
"Dan stinky!" Rachel giggled. She wondered over to Cuddy and sat on her lap. House took a seat and Dan sat next to him.
"Do you want to see a picture? I mean of Jen? Not my private areas. They're reserved." House asked Cuddy.
"That'll be nice House. And I definitely don't want to see your special area thank you." He reached into his pocket and grabbed his wallet. Hidden away from nosy on lookers was a wallet size picture. He took it out and passed it to Cuddy.
Her eyes immediately met chocolate brown eyes and hair of a smiling young woman. She was holding a child with deep blue eyes and chubby cheeks. Dan looked about 18 months old. Houses arm was wrapped around Jen and he was looking down at his son with a cheesey grin. It looked impromptu. Probably Wilson's idea. They were all sat on the sofa.
"It was Danny's second Christmas and 'Santa' had got him a sponge bob. He" pointing at Danny "was pestering for a talking spongebob ever since he learnt how to talk. It drove us nuts." He chuckled to Cuddy.
"Daddy, what has Dr Cuddy got?" House gestured for the picture and placed Danny on his lap.
"This was your second Christmas, and that's mummy and daddy holding our little monster" House started tickled Danny and squirmed.
"Daddy, can we have ice cream?" Danny asked after House stopped tickling him.
"James! Take us to the ice cream pallor! Your paying of course." House snapped his fingers and climbed off the bench.
"Yeah Unc! You're paying!" Danny imitated and ran after his dad.
"You coming Cuddy?" Wilson asked. "It looks like I'm paying" he faked sighed but was smirking.
"Ice cweem!" Rachel giggled.
"I think Rachels already made that decision." Cuddy grinned and grabbed Rachel's hand.
"See, he's not completely different. Still expects me to pay." He chortled.
They walked to the car, but Cuddy stopped and picked Rachel up. She looked at the squirming child. Holding Rachel as tightly as possible, she kissed her hair. At that moment, she released just how lucky she really was to have her little girl. To have everything.