A/N #1: This particular chapter is dedicated to my Timeless friends, Once Upon A Whim, TheVelvetDusk, and quertygal for their very generous input and invaluable insights. I couldn't have done it without you, my friends :)

Chapter 27

The minutes passed excruciatingly slowly after Julie left, and much as he was dreading sleeping by himself, Wyatt decided he couldn't stay on the sofa all night (no telling how early Jamie would be waking up). Going upstairs, he shed his clothes, and sliding under the covers, flinched at the cold emptiness of the king-sized bed without Lucy in it. Some time later, the faint chime of a new text message broke the lonely stillness of his bedroom, startling a dozing Wyatt, who clumsily grabbed for his phone where it lay on the small table beside the bed, nearly dropping it in his haste. With shaking hands, he looked closely at the tiny brightly-lit screen, and could have cried with happiness when he saw it was a text from Lucy:

I'm ok. Will text you tomorrow. Please get some sleep.

Wyatt shivered at the nearly-overwhelming wave of relief he felt as he read her brief, polite message more than once, several times, in fact (thank God for Julie Baumgardner). He immediately replied:

Thank you, Lucy

He had been so afraid that she would refuse to even see Julie, let alone listen to anything she had to say. Wyatt owed his friend a huge debt of gratitude for intervening on his behalf with Lucy, and even though it was nearing midnight, tapped out a quick thank you:

Just got a text from Lucy. I don't know what you said to her, but I am so grateful that she seems willing to at least text back and forth. Julie, I can't even begin to thank you enough for talking to Lucy for me. You're a lifesaver, and I owe you BIG TIME. Whatever you want, it's yours, Mrs. Baumgardner.

In spite of the late hour, she responded almost immediately, and Wyatt smiled for the first time in hours at her text:

Damn right I saved your ass, so don't screw this up, Wyatt Logan! I love you, you big idiot :), now try and get some sleep...

Feeling more at peace than he had in days, Wyatt thumbed through his pictures and found one of his favorites of Lucy, one that he had taken on Christmas Day. Gazing lovingly at the image of a smiling, radiant Lucy proudly wearing her new necklace, Wyatt pressed the phone to his heart, and closing his eyes, he solemnly promised, "I love you so much, and no matter what it takes, I will make this right with you, Lucy Preston, I swear," and turning off the lamp beside the bed, almost instantly fell deeply asleep, eager for tomorrow.

Early the next morning, Wyatt was awakened by his drowsy son patting him on the cheek. Wearing a puzzled expression, the five-year-old asked, "Daddy, where's Miss Lucy?" Lifting the covers, Wyatt waited until Jamie hopped in and snugged up beside him before answering. "Miss Lucy wasn't feeling very good last night and went home, buddy, remember?" and although he felt bad about being less than honest with his child, no way was he even going to try and explain what happened. What could he say? "Son, Miss Lucy went home last night because your father let his terrible temper get away from him and acted like a psychotic asshole and really hurt her feelings, if not broke her heart..." Yeah, sounded about right, if he wanted to mess up his kid for life.

"I don't think Miss Lucy will be coming back today, but you will probably see her at school tomorrow," he consoled the child, and was relieved when Jamie nodded and fell asleep. Now that he was wide awake, however, Wyatt lay quietly with his sleeping child curled against him, and began thinking of all the things he wanted to tell Lucy when she began texting him today, hopefully sometime soon. He had made just about the worst mistake of his life by keeping certain things from her, and if not for Julie, might have single-handedly destroyed the most important thing to him in the world (besides Jamie) as a result. It was agony to wait, but judging from the devastated expression on Lucy's face when she walked out of his home last night, Wyatt more than deserved every second of suffering he would willingly endure waiting for her to make the first move (please, God, help me to find the right words to say what's in my heart).

It had been a while since Lucy had slept alone in her own bed, and to her dismay, she discovered that sleeping with Wyatt Logan had apparently flat out ruined her for solitary slumber. Lucy desperately missed sharing a bed with him, the way he tended to curl himself around her so protectively each night, the gentle warmth of his breath against the back of her neck, waking most mornings to slow, sweet kisses. Abruptly, she was extremely angry at Wyatt for risking what they had together, and it took a few minutes of deep breathing to calm herself down. Her anger began to subside as rapidly as it cropped up though as she considered some of the things that Julie had shared with her last night. Because Wyatt had seldom talked about Jamie's mother, and she was loathe to pry, Lucy didn't have the slightest idea how much he dreaded the momentous, obviously depressing (if not painful), "Jessica" days, and not for the first time, fervently wished she had known this sooner. Not to mention he had kept hidden the fact that he had a ferocious temper, which, in hindsight, was something she would have preferred to be aware of (knowing Wyatt, he probably considered a hot temper to be a serious character flaw).

As much as Wyatt keeping information like this to himself annoyed and frustrated Lucy, she had to admit, however, it was pretty much in keeping with what she knew of him. Wyatt Logan definitely didn't possess a talkative, gregarious personality like that of his best friend, Dave Baumgardner. On the contrary, he was usually a very private man, quiet and thoughtful, and Lucy doubted those personality traits would be changing any time soon, nor did she necessarily want them to. However, going forward, she realized it was crucial to both her and their relationship that Wyatt make an effort to be more open with his thoughts and feelings. Otherwise, Lucy feared this type of situation could sabotage their future together at any time.

Glancing at her phone, she saw it was still quite early, but Lucy had a feeling that Wyatt might already be awake. She herself had slept only fitfully, alternating between longing for Wyatt and recalling flashes of his angry words. Setting the phone down on the bed, Lucy went into the bathroom and stared in dismay at her reflection in the mirror above the sink. She looked awful, pale and drawn, with lovely purplish-colored shadows under her bloodshot eyes, and if Amy caught sight of her looking like this, she'd instantly suspect something was wrong. Splashing some warm water on her face, Lucy was troubled at the thought of, if not outright lying to her sister, then certainly misleading her on purpose. But it couldn't be helped–at the first hint that Wyatt had (in her mind) mistreated her big sister, Amy Preston would show Wyatt what the word "nuclear" meant to her. Even worse, once she ripped him a new one, Amy would never forgive him, and Lucy couldn't let that happen, not if she and Wyatt were to have the future she desperately hoped for.

Padding over to the window, she peeked out and sighed in relief that Amy's car still wasn't parked out front. Little sister must not have come home last night, and Lucy was grateful for the reprieve. Climbing back under the covers, she grabbed her phone, and taking a deep breath, decided to see if Wyatt was awake and finally ready for some honest communication.

Hey, you awake?

A soft smile involuntarily graced her face at his almost immediate reply:

Yeah, just laying here in bed with Jamie, who went back to sleep.

Lucy's heart ached at the bittersweet mental image his words conjured up. Any other Sunday during the past couple months, she would have been sharing Wyatt's bed when the five-year-old wandered into his dad's room, as he did most weekend mornings (did Jamie wonder where she was?). Lucy loved cuddling up with the Logans, she and Wyatt talking in soft murmurs as his small son slept between them. It was a loving, wonderful way to start their day, and she felt bereft being here by herself in her own lonely bed. A small thing, perhaps, but just one of the many reasons Lucy was willing to work hard at mending this rift between the two of them. She looked down absently as her phone chimed.

Lucy, are you there?

Yeah, sorry, just thinking. Is Jamie ok? Did he ask where I was?

Oh, ok. He's fine, except for missing you, and you should know he did ask for you last night and then again this morning. I told him you weren't feeling very good and went home. I know that's not really a lie, but it's really not the truth, either. Lesser of two evils, maybe?

I miss him, too, very much and can't wait to see him at school tomorrow.

That will make him so happy...Um, Lucy, can I just say something?

Sure.

First of all, I know that nothing can undo what happened last nite, and there's no way to take back my hateful words, but please, please, believe me, I am SO sorry. Yesterday morning got off to a bad start for me, as you know, and by the time we saw each other at the end of the day, I was already stuck in a not so good place, and if I had brain one in my thick skull, I should have recognized the warning signs...

When several moments passed silently after she received this text, Lucy stared at her phone in anticipation before cautiously prompting:

Can you explain, please?

Please don't take this the wrong way, Lucy, but the reason I was so messed up yesterday morning was because I had just woke up from a very intense dream about Jessica.

Her breath caught painfully at his confession (hey, she wanted him to open up to her, and only a naive fool would expect that meant nothing but good things).

I'm not sure how to take that...

Let me try to explain. At first, I was happy to see her in the dream 'cause I have very seldom dreamed about Jess in the five years since she died, and weirdly, she looked and sounded exactly like she did the last time I saw her.

Was that what upset you so much?

Not really, oddly enough, but I guess it was probably part of what eventually made me feel so bad. In the dream, I was sitting on a bench at the playground, watching you push Jamie on the swings, and suddenly there she was, sitting beside me, talking about Jamie, and it was just so real, one of the realest dreams I've ever had. And, uh, I don't know how you're gonna take this, but if I'm going to be truly honest, um, you were pregnant in my dream...

Lucy stared at her phone in stunned silence (Pregnant? What the hell?) before responding:

What? Pregnant? That's a pretty big jump, considering we've only been dating a few months...

I know, but Lucy, full disclosure, this dream wasn't the first time I've thought about having a child with you...

And for a few glorious seconds, Lucy blushed at the delightful mental image of carrying Wyatt's child before rapidly tapping out:

Really? You've thought about us having a baby?

I have. But that's probably a discussion for another time...

Wyatt watched his phone intently for a moment or two with a sinking feeling. Maybe he should have kept his "wanting to have a family with Lucy" hopes to himself, and decided it might also be a good idea to keep quiet about his son calling her "Mommy" in the dream. He patiently gave her a little longer before sending:

Lucy? Still with me?

And breathed a deep sigh of relief when she replied:

Yeah, sorry, truthfully, just trying to figure out how I feel about starting a family with you anytime soon, Wyatt, after what happened. I hope this doesn't sound cruel, but a baby is absolutely the last thing we need now.

Not cruel at all, and I agree with you 100 percent.

Good. What did Jessica say in the dream that upset you so much? Or was it just seeing her that did it? If that's not too personal?

No, it's ok. I think the first thing she said was 'Wyatt, you've done a good job raising our son' or something like that. And then she smiled, and I could feel the tears sliding down my face, even though I was still asleep. I remember asking her how it was possible that I was dreaming about her, but she just frowned and said she didn't know. I think I started to get upset when she seemed confused and asked if I was glad to see her. That made me feel guilty.

Wyatt paused, then hit "send," needing a minute to compose himself. He had tried very hard all day yesterday to put the disturbing dream out of his mind, and it was torture to make himself relive it. But it was the very least that Lucy deserved after the way he had treated her. Whatever it took, no matter how much it hurt Wyatt or made him uncomfortable, he owed her that much. Finally, she replied:

I can see how that would upset you. Then what happened?

Jess was watching you and Jamie across the playground with a sad look on her face and told me, 'Wyatt, I know he loves her, and I'm glad, but please don't let him forget me' and then said something like she carried him for 9 mon and loved him for 8 mon and how that has to count for something...

Wyatt sent the message, worrying if he should reveal the last words "dream" Jess spoke before his alarm went off. He must have delayed too long because after another minute or so, Lucy prompted:

Wyatt, is that all?

He hesitated before deciding she needed to hear everything. It was the only way he could even hope to earn her forgiveness, with complete honesty from now on.

No. The last thing Jess wanted me to promise her before my alarm went off and I woke up was to please make sure Jamie remembers who his first mama was.

After an uncomfortably lengthy pause, during which Wyatt was berating himself for telling Lucy that last part, she texted back:

Wyatt, please don't take this the wrong way, but just so I understand what you're saying, it would seem your subconscious is starting to consider me as your son's second mother. Am I way off base here, or does that sound about right? And I'm no therapist, but if that's how you really feel, then is it possible that in spite of how much you love me, and I know in my heart you do, you feel guilty about me maybe some day becoming your child's stepmother? Because Jessica is dead and I'm not?

Despite the happiness he felt at Lucy's warm reassurance that she knew he loved her, Wyatt was sharply taken aback by her exceedingly blunt question about Jessica, and as he was struggling for an answer, Jamie stirred against him, and blinking open drowsy dark blue eyes (great timing, son), whispered hopefully, "Morning, Daddy, I'm hungry. Can we please have waffles?" Wyatt smiled gently at the five-year-old, "Sure, buddy, why don't you go use the bathroom while I get dressed and then we'll go downstairs, okay? And don't forget to wash your hands," he instructed. Wyatt watched fondly as Jamie eagerly scrambled out of bed and headed for the bathroom. His phone chimed again:

Wyatt? You still there? Did my question make you mad? I'm sorry if it did, but I'm just trying to figure out what was going on with you yesterday.

Dammit, she was already starting to misinterpret his messages (stupid texting). He nearly dropped the phone in his hurry to reply:

No, Lucy, no, I'm not mad or even bothered by your question at all, honest. Jamie just woke up and asked for waffles, so I guess I better rustle up some breakfast for the little guy. Sorry, but I have to go now. Lucy, I'm so grateful you texted me this morning, I really am. If you want to, maybe we could text some more later tonite after he goes to bed. If you don't feel like it, I understand. Thank you, Lucy.

As much as he wanted to add "I love you" to the text, it was probably still too soon. Although he wished his son had slept a little while longer, Wyatt felt somewhat better now that he had briefly heard from Lucy. He missed her so much already after just one night. His roomy bed had never seemed so solitary before, not even after Jess died. And it was about so much more than their very satisfying intimate relationship. Wyatt had very quickly gotten used to sharing a bed with Lucy, and he loved the way she felt in his arms at night when she was all warm and sleepy and trusting. The word 'trust' gave him pause. Wyatt closed his eyes in despair as he wondered how long it would be before Lucy trusted him again with her heart. Just then, Jamie ran out of the bathroom with a proud grin on his face, "All done, Daddy! Now can we have waffles, please?" and when his dad answered in the affirmative, cheered, "Yay! Hurry, Daddy, my tummy's empty," and Wyatt resigned himself to an endless day without Lucy as he pulled on a long-sleeved tee and sweats. He tried not to think about how many hours it might be until he would hear from Lucy again. Like a moron, Wyatt had been so worried the past couple of weeks about getting through this particular day because it was Jessica's birthday. What a fool he'd been, because now, the day before him seemed even more interminable and sad than he had feared. "Hurry, Daddy, I need some waffles," his son shouted up the stairs, and sighing in resignation, Wyatt went downstairs to get this day started.

Lucy lay back against the pillows and tried to process everything that Wyatt had surprisingly discussed with her. Scrolling back through their conversation, the first thing that struck her was that he had freely confessed his desire for more children, and in his mind, it was clear he had chosen her for their mother. While she had secretly considered wanting to start a family some day with Wyatt Logan, they hadn't had that specific discussion yet since they had only been dating about three months, so she hadn't been sure exactly how he felt about the subject, up to now.

Holding the phone against her heart, Lucy let herself feel the tiniest scrap of hope for their future before continuing to read the messages. She had to admit, although she had guessed from his emotional behavior yesterday morning that somehow his wife was involved (despite not knowing the significance of the date January 15), his frankness when relating the details of his dream had pleased Lucy. In her mind, it was far better to know about stuff that had the power to hurt their relationship, even if Wyatt's pain and bewilderment were simultaneously easy to discern and uncomfortable to witness.

Good Lord, what kind of feelings had he been struggling with for the past five years since the tragic loss of his young wife? No wonder Wyatt had become physically ill from the aftereffects of his dream about Jessica (more like nightmare, in her opinion). Lucy tried to imagine dreaming so vividly about her deceased parents, to the point where they actually spoke to her, and just the thought kind of freaked her out. And to top it off, according to Wyatt, dream Jessica had begged him to keep her memory alive for their son. My God. Lucy couldn't even begin to comprehend the many levels of guilt Wyatt must be carrying around that they would manifest themselves in such a brutal manner.

But what, she wondered, could Wyatt have to feel guilty for? Hadn't Jessica been killed in a car accident while Wyatt had been at home with Jamie? Her mind drifted back to the day she and Julie had gone shopping for dresses to wear to the Christmas Gala and their conversation about Jessica. She had to give her friend credit: Julie had totally called it about Wyatt keeping his feelings concerning his wife's death all "bottled" up, and in her opinion, what could possibly happen if the bottle blows up. She had also surmised that perhaps one of Wyatt's dreaded "Jess" days could have been the catalyst for his meltdown yesterday. In spite of herself, Lucy smirked. Julie Baumgardner might only be in her late 20's, but she was quite a perceptive woman, wise beyond her years, and turning out to be a very reliable friend to Lucy. Impulsively, she scrolled through her texting history and sent a message to the blonde:

Morning. Thanks again for coming to see me last nite. You're a good friend, Julie.

Within seconds, her phone chimed with the other woman's response:

But is it a GOOD morning, Lucy? Cause I'm dying to know, and for once (ha), I didn't have the nerve to text either of you. So, help a girl out here...

Lucy snickered when she read the message. Julie Baumgardner was something else, all right, and after the thoughtful, valuable advice she'd given her (and Wyatt), Lucy didn't hesitate before sharing with Julie the highlights of her text conversation with Wyatt from this morning, even the part about babies. She marveled at her friend's lightning-fast texting skills when she replied at length less than a minute later:

Wow! Wow! Wow! Lucy Preston, that must have been some conversation. First, Wyatt basically confirms he wants you to have his child (swoon). Then he actually tells you all about that terrible Jess dream that obviously set in motion everything leading to his temper tantrum. Gotta say, I'm really proud of Wyatt. Of course, none of this in ANY WAY excuses how awful he treated you, but Lucy, I'm not sure if you understand what a breakthrough this is for him. Not only did he sincerely apologize, but willingly shared something with you. This is so big! Thank you, Lucy, for giving my friend a second chance. You won't regret it.

Lucy frowned at her phone, slightly uneasy with her friend's enthusiasm, and had to remind herself that Julie and Wyatt had been very good friends for years now, which of course, influenced her to some degree, before telling her:

I'm glad you're happy, Julie, but please slow down, this morning was just the first step. Yes, I do feel a bit better now, but even though I miss him and Jamie so much, and I want to forgive him, it's gonna be a while before I can forget something like this. Julie, he bruised my heart badly, and I'm afraid I will have to learn to trust him all over again. I do love Wyatt, so much, and I'm willing and ready to work hard for our future together. But I'm not naive enough to think we can fix this in a day or even two.

Her friend's response, when it came through, was definitely more subdued than before:

Lucy, I'm so sorry, and of course, you're right. Trust is a fragile thing, and rebuilding your trust in Wyatt WILL take time, I know. Guess I'm just so excited that you're even willing to start the process at all. Good luck, Lucy, and if you need me for anything, please let me know :)

That's ok, I know what you meant. Thanks, Julie, for being my friend, and Wyatt's too.

Without warning, Lucy yawned fiercely, and suddenly exhausted, thought that maybe a little more sleep was a good idea. Carefully putting her phone on the night stand, she slid under the covers and quickly dozed off. What felt like five seconds later, a groggy Lucy felt her sister perch herself on the side of the bed, and heard her ask, "What are you doing here, Luce? Are you not feeling well? Is there something wrong?" Lucy reluctantly opened her eyes to see a faintly frowning Amy staring at her expectantly, concern shining in her blue eyes, and groaned inwardly at her chances of getting through this conversation with Amy convincingly. Her sister wasn't stupid, and Lucy was a terrible liar.

"Uh, hey, Amy, you're home. What time is it?" she asked innocently in a raspy voice, trying to buy herself enough time to at least wake up properly. "It's around 3:00," her sibling confirmed, and as Lucy pulled herself up against the pillows, visibly winced and blurted out, "Damn, girl, you do look terrible. Are you sick?" and Lucy hastily put both hands on her forehead and answered, "No, I'm fine. After Julie dropped me and Jamie off at Wyatt's yesterday, my head started pounding really bad, and I decided it might be quieter for me here than at his place, especially since you usually go out on Saturday night," and managed a wan smile. She struggled not to flinch as her sister's gaze sharpened, but Lucy must look pretty terrible indeed because Amy only patted her leg, and thoughtfully asked if she needed anything.

"No thanks, I think I'm going to take some more ibuprofen and grab a hot shower, maybe have a piece of toast or something," and Lucy was relieved when her sister merely nodded and kissed her cheek before leaving the bedroom. Lucy closed her eyes and slid down under the covers before reaching over and picking up her phone. There were no new messages (guess Wyatt is waiting to hear from me first). And naturally, Lucy's head truly was starting to ache, probably from sleeping so soundly in the middle of the day. "Oh, what a tangled web we weave..." she thought ruefully before getting out of bed. It seemed Lucy really did need some pain reliever, a long shower, and maybe a bite to eat, in that order.

At least she had fooled Amy for the time being, not that Lucy was proud of that fact. But it was all part of whatever effort it took to get her relationship with Wyatt back on track. Lucy found she was looking forward to texting him this evening. She missed him so much already, and hoped the sooner they were able to clear up at least some of this mess they were in, the closer to rebuilding their bond they would be. Glancing at her phone, Lucy calculated it would more than five hours yet before Jamie went to bed. She sighed. It was going to be an endless wait until then.

The afternoon passed quietly (tediously) at the Logan home. After making the requested waffles for his son, Wyatt decided to pass the lonely hours by doing some housework and catching up on their laundry, mind-numbing tasks that were just boring enough to allow him to seriously concentrate on what he and Lucy could discuss later today. He also set Jamie to straightening up his room, and after a quick lunch, they headed for the grocery store to pick up food for his son's lunches and their supper this week (wonder if there's any chance Lucy will be here to share any of our meals?), and made sure, just in case, to buy enough to feed the three of them.

Wyatt thought wistfully about Lucy all day, and the hours dragged until it was finally time for his son's bath before bedtime. After he was dried off, in his pajamas, and had brushed his teeth, all surprisingly accomplished without a single protest, Jamie hopped in bed for his story, and nearly broke Wyatt's heart when he plaintively informed him, "Daddy, you are a good daddy, but I really wish Miss Lucy was here cause I miss her." Wyatt cleared his suddenly choked up throat before tenderly kissing the little boy's cheek and carefully tucking him under the covers. "I wish she was here, too, son, very much, but remember, you should see Miss Lucy at school tomorrow," and was relieved Jamie flashed him a sleepy dimpled grin and said, "Okay. Good night, Daddy, love you," before rolling over. Wyatt stood and after turning on the Spiderman night light, pensively gazed down at his child for a moment before going downstairs to wait to hear from Lucy.

A/N #2: Well, that was an eventful 24 hours for our favorite couple. And fair warning, just like in real life, it will take some time for Wyatt and Lucy to make their way back to each other, but they will, I promise. Finally, with this chapter, First Steps has officially broken the 100,000 word mark, a feat I never dreamed was possible when I started writing the story back in June. My deepest appreciation to everyone for their support and encouragement (especially emilycares) in the form of favorites, follows, and wonderful reviews. When I start to doubt myself, I go back and read over some of the reviews, and am instantly uplifted. So, to all of you, thank you, thank you, thank you! :)))