AN: HAPPY ST. PATRICK'S DAY!
HERE IS MY FIRST CHAPTER!
Chapter 1. - Sidelined -
Lightning sat in his blacked out trailer. He was racing in his third race of the season.
"All right! Focus, speed… I am speed." Lightning said as he closed his eyes "One winner, forty-two losers…"
"Are you ready?" Mack asked as he banged on the trailer "It's time to go."
"Yeah… I'm ready!" Lightning said as he activated the trailer's ramp "Let's do this!"
He rolled down the ramp. Half way down, Lightning sank down on his left front tire.
"Ka chow!" He exclaimed "Are you guys ready? Cause lightning is about to strike."
Cameras flashed all around Lightning as he rolled down the ramp.
"Lightning!" called Kori Turbowitz "Do you have any comments about the race?"
Kori was one of a few reporters allowed in the restricted section.
"Who knows." Lightning said "There are many risks in racing. I may win, come in last, or not even finish."
Only a year ago, Lightning would have made an egocentric comment saying there was no reason for him to lose the race.
"Thank you for your comments." Kori said before turning to the camera car filming her. "That was the Piston Cup point leader, Lightning McQueen."
"McQueen!" called another reporter "Is it true that you're dating a Porsche?"
Lightning smiled in response. Because he wanted to protect Sally from the media onslaught, Lightning was trying to keep his relationship with her a secret.
"I have no comment on the subject." Lightning said "No more questions please, I have to get ready."
Lightning drove over to his crew chief, Doc Hudson.
"Hey Doc!" Lightning said, parking next to the retired racecar "Is the pit crew ready?"
"Yep. They're making final preparations now." Doc said in his usual gruff manner "You ready?"
"Yes. It was such a boring ride, I slept most of the way." Lightning said "So I got nothing to complain about. When we drove into town, I saw an ad for burial plots. It made me think… that's the last thing I'll need!" (An: yes the jokes are starting!)
Doc looked at Lightning blankly. *crickets could be heard chirping*
"You're not complaining about something." Doc said ignoring the bad joke "That's a fucking surprise."
"Is not!" Lightning said "I thought you wanted to cut down on the cursing this year."
It was always funny for Lightning to hear someone venerable as Doc using bad words. Doc was like any other racecar/crew chief, he liked to swear. When Doc was around other racecars and/or in company of friends, he rarely censored himself.
"I was planning to do that, but I changed my mind." Doc growled "If you knew how to race, maybe I wouldn't have to swear as much."
"I told you, I was slipping in the corners!" Lightning laughed as Doc glared at him "You can't blame me for my poor performance in last week's race."
"No excuses." Doc growled "If you want to win the cup this season, you have to start racing better."
Lightning's response was to sigh, he knew Doc was right.
Soon: Lightning and Doc looked over to the Dinoco camp. They watched Sapphire and her crew chief preparing for the race.
"Is that Sapphire's new crew chief?" Lightning asked "She looks a lot like Tex Dinoco."
"Yeah, Sapphire fired her old crew chief after it was determined that he caused her accident." Doc said "That's Victoria, she is Tex's daughter. She's new to the Piston Cup, but she was one of the top crew chiefs in the Touring Car League… do you ever pay attention at meetings?"
"I sometimes pay attention... I can't help it. I get board and my mind starts to wander." Lightning said "Sapphire looks like she has fully recovered."
Two women rolled up to Sapphire. The family resemblance was so strong; there was no doubt they were Sapphire's sisters. Strip and Lynda rolled up to their daughters. Strip calls them 'his jewels'; Sapphire, Diamond, and Ruby. After Lightning turned down Tex's offer. The much coveted sponsorship went to Strip's oldest daughter. Sapphire is a spitting image of her father but without the huge spoiler. She has two Piston Cups to her name. Diamond and Ruby don't race, but they enjoy the sport. Last year, Sapphire had a severe wreck and was sidelined for rest of the season. She hasn't fully recovered, but she is getting stronger every race. Even in her injured condition, she is still considered a top competitor.
"Racecars make your way to the track!" the loudspeaker called "Final call… Racecars make your way to the track!"
The call echoed along pit lane. As always, Lightning's stomach twisted nervously.
"It's time for me to head to the track." He said "I'll see you in five hundred laps Old Man."
"Good luck Rookie." Doc said as Lightning rolled out onto the track "Just don't screw up like you did last week."
"Thanks for reminding me." Lightning said "I don't think I'll ever be able to live that down."
Lightning lined up beside Sapphire.
"You look good today." He commented "However you are not going to beat me this week, because I am speed."
Sapphire laughed
"I can't believe you're still using that goofy saying." She responded playfully "If you want to beat me today, you're going to have to be fast. Besides, didn't I show you boys what racing was all about… or have you forgotten who won last week's race."
All the racecars around her chuckled.
"Focus Lightning." Doc's voice cut into the friendly banter "Remember Kid, float like a Cadillac…"
"…And sting like a Beamer!" Lightning said finishing the now famous quote "I'm ready, let's do this!"
Dexter Hoover raised the green flag over his hood and then dropped it quickly. Lightning shot onto the track along with all his competitors. Half way in to the race: Chick deliberately sideswiped Lightning. Sparks flew in all directions as Lightning bounced off a retaining wall. Lightning's collision with the wall set off a chain of collisions behind him. Dexter Hoover waved a yellow flag.
"We got a yellow." Doc said "Bring it in, I want to look at you."
"It's just a dent and a cut." Lightning said "I'm bleeding, but it's not that bad. I want to stay on the track."
"If you're bleeding you need to come in. You don't want to be black flagged for not attending to an open wound." Doc said "It's going to take the grounds crew a few laps to clean up that mess."
"Copy that." Lightning said "I'm heading in."
Cars that were in the massive pile up, but wasn't injured or injured badly, headed to their pits. Medics arrived and started attending to the cars that needed medical attention. Due to the yellow flag: Chick ended up behind Lightning as they drove down pit road. Lightning's pit was in the middle of pit lane. Chick's pit was right in front of Lightning's. As soon as Lightning reached his pit box the pit crew started to clean the wound.
"Ouch!... Damn that hurts!" Lightning exclaimed as Chick reached his pit box. "Chick! You fucking dickhood! Stay in your fucking lane!"
As usual, Chick ignored Lightning. Lightning knew that he would be fined for using profanity. Unlike Doc, Lightning rarely cursed. This time however, he couldn't help himself. Using profanity during a race wasn't against the rules, but it was considered unsportsmanlike conduct and it was strongly discouraged. Racecars, pit crews, and crew chiefs that were caught using profanity normally faced a stiff fine. Thirty seconds later: Chick tore from his pit, while Lightning remained in his.
"Come on… go faster!" Lightning said "I have to catch up with Chick."
"The crew is working as fast as possible." Doc said "We're still in a caution, you're not going to lose your position."
Once the crew had Lightning's wound cleaned up, Doc could see it wasn't that deep so he had the head pity spray a liquid bandage over the cut.
"OH! THAT BURNS! BABY HIPPOS… DUCKLINGS!" Lightning exclaimed. As much as he wanted to curse, he couldn't do it, and it didn't help that there was a track official standing six feet away from him. "PUPPIES, PUPPIES, KITTENS, KITTENS, BABY HIPPOS… DUCKLINGS!**… FUDGE NUGGETS!"
"Interesting curse words. You're ready, get back out there!" Doc said, Lightning tore from his pit "And watch your language, you don't want to be fined for using profanity."
"Well, it might be too late for that. I didn't see that official standing next to me when I yelled at Chick." Lightning commented "Besides, you have no room to talk. How many times have you been fined for cussing? And it's only the third race in the season."
"Just get your rear fender up to the leaders." Doc growled "I know it's going to be pointless but, I'm filing a complaint against Chick."
"If you want to." Lightning responded "I doubt the officials will do anything."
Late in the race: Lightning was in sixth place.
"All right Rookie." Doc said "It's time to get serious. As soon as you pass the start/finish line, I want you to go for the lead. Be careful, Chick is in first."
"I understand." Lightning said "Just keep me informed if he tries anything."
As soon as Lightning passed the starter's stand, he unleashed a blistering amount of speed. Moments later: Lightning easily passed four cars and ended up behind Chick. Chick was incredibly hard to pass, he was a master at blocking. If the racecar managed to get around him, he would then attempt a PIT maneuver on him. Which by the way, was not an illegal move. It too was considered unsportsmanlike conduct and carried a bigger fine than cursing. However, Chick had a silver tongue and he could talk his way out of almost anything. Much to the frustration of the racecars, the racing league rarely punished Chick for his bad behavior. On lap four hundred and ninety-nine: Lightning and Chick were racing side-by-side. Going into the final turn, Lightning used the corner of the track as a slingshot and accelerated. He flew down the home stretch and won the race by two car lengths. Lightning had already crossed the finish line, when Chick rammed into his back right fender. Losing control, Lightning spun out in the infield grass. He groaned in pain as he made his way back to the track.
"Are you okay?" Sapphire asked when she pulled alongside "Do you want me to call a medic?"
"No, I'm fine, but thanks for asking." Lightning said painfully "Where did you finish?"
"Third." Sapphire said "I simply didn't have it today. Come on let's do our cooldown laps. I don't know about you, but I'm exhausted."
By the time Lightning and Sapphire finished their laps, Doc and Victoria were waiting for them at the gate.
"You okay Kid?" Doc asked "You took a beating out there today."
"I think everyone took a beating. The race was very physical." Lightning said "Holey crap, my side is sore."
"Let me see it." Doc said "I want to make sure you're going to be okay."
"Whatever you say Doc." Lightning replied, turning gingerly. "I'm so glad we're going home for two weeks."
Doc saw that the wound was now caked in dry oil, dirt, and other debris from the track. There were no races for two weeks after the first three races in the season. It allowed the racing officials to have meetings and discuss potential problems for the coming year.
"Well I have good news." Doc said after examining the wound "Although the dent is larger from the last time I saw it, it's not too bad. Come straight back to the trailer after the award ceremony, I need to clean that up before we head home."
As Lightning, Chick and Sapphire headed to the stage:
"You should wear a condom over your hood." Lightning said angrily "Because if you act like a dick, you should dress like one."
Chick immediately got into Lightning's grill
"What's the matter punk? Can't handle racing the champ?" Chick taunted "Why don't you go back to fucking whores in your trailer?"
"At least I can pleasure them. I've heard your dick is so small, you could fuck a Cheerio and not break it." Lightning snapped "If you have a problem with me, write it on a piece of paper, fold it, then stick it up your fucking tailpipe."
"Boys cut it out! You are supposed to be professionals… Start acting like it!" Sapphire demanded as two security guards separated Chick and Lightning "Lightning… calm down. *she lowers her voice.* He's not worth getting into trouble over. Chick is pissed off because he was fined ten thousand dollars for hitting you after you crossed the finish line."
"I'll probably end up being fined as well." Lightning said "I dropped an f-bomb on the track after Chick hit me… I couldn't help it…it hurt! Since I just yelled at Chick, I'll probably get in trouble for that too."
"I wouldn't worry too much about it… You know it's not that uncommon for racecars to have shouting matches after the race. Emotions are pretty high." Sapphire said "You and Chick didn't throw punches at each other, like Kevin Racingtire(Shifty Drug #35) and Billy Oilchanger(Octane Gain #58) did last week. That fight, got them a four race suspension and they were fined five thousand dollars each. If you don't want to end up like them, I suggest you let it go."
"You're right, Thanks Sapphire." Lightning said after taking a deep breath. "Now come on, let's go get our awards!"
Sapphire smiled hugely and followed Lightning to the winner's circle. After the award ceremony: Lightning grinned and waved to the crowd despite the pain it caused. After about ten minutes, Lightning headed back to his trailer.
"Oh! Damn that hurts." Lightning said as he put the trophy down "I would've been back sooner, but everyone wanted pictures."
"I see nothing has changed." Doc said "You're still a media darling… Now get your butt over here, I need to clean that wound."
Doc already had his mechanical arms extended.
"Do you know if I got fined for swearing on the track?" Lightning asked as Doc started to clean the wound "Chick got… *Lightning hissed as his wound burned.* fined for hitting me… *hisses again.* I know that's supposed to burn a little, *hisses a third time* but it's actually making my eyes water."
"Your wound is very dirty, so I've made the solution a little stronger than normal. It should stop burning in a few minutes. I'm going to spray the area with an antibiotic, last thing we need is you getting an infection." Doc said, Lightning jumped when he felt a cool mist being sprayed on his side "I'll let that dry for a few minutes. As for being fined, I haven't heard anything. So either the officials didn't hear it, or they thought it was justified. However I wouldn't recommend any more swearing on the track… Now, how does that feel?"
"A little better." Lightning said yawning "It's still painful, but I'm guessing it will be painful until you get the dent out."
"Unfortunately yes. It's too deep for me to do anything with it right now." Doc said "I'll have to work on it when we get home."
"Today is one of those days where I hate being a racecar… By now you would think they would have come up with a pain killer that doesn't increase speed." Lightning moaned "Are you sure that there's nothing you can give me? My whole side is throbbing."
"I'm sorry Kiddo, but there isn't." Doc said "I would spray some Biofreeze on it, but you have a cut... I can't spray it on an open wound… an ice pack is the only thing I can do. I have several in my trailer. Sit there and don't move, I'll be back in a moment."
"Sit there… don't move… I wish Doc wouldn't treat me like a five-year-old…" Lightning muttered to himself as Doc rolled to his trailer "… Chick's fault… beat the crap out of him…"
Lightning was still muttering to himself when Doc returned with an ice pack wrapped in a magnetic sleeve. He gently attached the sleeve to Lightning's side.
"There that should help." Doc said "Do you need help getting into your trailer?"
"No thanks, I'll manage." Lightning said as he slowly backed into the trailer "Chick is getting rougher every race."
"I've noticed that. It seems the racing officials are encouraging his bad behavior. They even had the balls to dismiss my complaint I filed earlier." Doc growled angrily "If that son of a bitch does something like this again and the league doesn't do anything, I'm filing criminal charges!"
"Don't worry about it." Lightning said "It's no big deal."
"Yeah it is." Doc said "Now let's go home."
The three haulers: Mack- pulled Lightning's trailer. Abby, Mack's girlfriend- pulled Doc's trailer. The third hauler: Daniel- pulled the pit crew's trailer, all headed out to the interstate.
AN: "A silver tongue" Is used to define someone who has a clever way with words. They have the skill to convince someone or can sweet talk someone into doing something.
**Adam Savage -MythBusters- Episode "No Pain, No Gain"
COMMENTS:
Guest 2
WOW! Long time no talk or chapters here but it's been worth the wait. Nice to see you back again. A well specified life as a car be it male or female. Hope you've been OK. I look forward to your new story- Yes, it's been a while. How have you been? I've been busy and crazy. I wanted to get everyone up to speed so, I wouldn't get people asking if they are human or not. I also wanted to introduce the "Mechanical arms idea" before I got into the story. Since this is a rewrite, i was wondering if I would get any comments. I'm planning on posting chapters twice a week. Hopefully on Sundays and Thursdays.
I do not own Cars or any of its characters. PIXAR AND DISNEY CLAIM THAT RIGHT. READING ENJOYMENT ONLY
Please read and review! I need criticism and encouragements! Rated M for language and sex